You know what? I’ve got me some pretty bad insomnia right now. I’ve always been able tp sleep like a baby before. This must all be part of some crazy left-wing plot to deprive me of my much needed rest adn casue mi tpynugs tooo grt rllly bd. Dmn U Nancy-Boy Pelosi and your San Francisco values!

UPDATE: Now it appears that my typing is fine excetp wneh K srtat rto cmoplnai abotu ti. Clearly a nefarious plot by the Democratic Party to deprive me of my much needed cmoplnaign baout ny por tpynigs. Dmn U Nancy Pelosi, and your little dog too!

I’m confused; can we take credit for this or not?

UPDATE 2: Well, that sucks. I just remembered that I’ve always had insomnia, and my typing has always resssemblld dat uf a fvie yr olde. I think it might be worse that I can’t blame Pelosi (as opposed to being the victim of some bizzare sleep deprivation/bad typing mind control experiment).

PENIS

Uh, it’s PENUS.

Why does the Wank kind of look like Toby from the Office in that picture. Goodbye, Toby, its been nice!

PENIS

MUST CREDIT DRUDGE

He then said “I am a Democrat and here is my energy plan” and he held up a picture of an old VW Bug with a sail attached to it. He paraded around he house floor with the sign while the crowd cheered.

Stay classy GOP. I’d love to have a link to that picture so the very next time some WATB bipartisan concern troll shows up, I can shove it (the picture and not my PENIUS) in their faces and scream SUCK. ON. THIS.

Also, beer would be nice.

Hmm, a debate in Congress where one side got pissy, turned off the lights and mics and left… golly, this sounds familiar. Musta been a dhimmicrat last time it happened too.

How the FUCK did we get to being a country where the GOP indulges in this kindergarten bullshit!??!?!??!?!!!!?!

Now I know why I don’t have the flying car and trips to the moon I was promised as a kid.

THIS WHOLE FUCKING COUNTRY IS FIRED!

He then said “I am a Democrat and here is my energy plan” and he held up a picture of an old VW Bug with a sail attached to it. He paraded around he house floor with the sign while the crowd cheered.

I would like to imagine that the VW Bug was pink, that the hippies drawn as driving it have The Onion cartoon’s style stink flies hovering around them, that as he carried the poster around he had one hand on his hip and he was swinging his hip and chanting ‘la-di-da oo-ee lookame I’m a gay Democrap’, thus pretty much bringing Homer Simpsons’ more obnoxious moments to life on the House floor.

But in general I like the idea of the Republicans getting used to be a clownish, abused, disrespected, unlistened-to minority in Congress.

Uhh, yeah those goopers are the growedup party all right. Not like those shrill and un-serious Democrats!

I’m confused. I mean, it’s sad they can’t get their little bill heard.

But, umm, last I heard you couldn’t filibuster everyone going home.

They say they’re talking about energy, but didn’t they just vote no on a solar energy bill? And the use it or lose it amendment to energy related oil prospecting leases?

What’s their plan?

A VW Bug with a sail on it is still 500% better than anything those shit heads have to offer. “No srsly, if u let us drill on teh beachez teh majikal sykologee fairees will make it all bettr!”

Useless twerps.

The fact is, Pelosi is both a joke and dangerous to the nation! Her weird ideas on energy will sink America’s economy permanently, all because of a fairy tale spun by the odious, idiotic, fat Gore? Who has waxed rich on his fantasies. This is unbelievable! How can American patriots allow this ultra leftist idiot to screw up the mightiest economy in the world? Pelosi represents all the worst aspects of effete Californian decadence. People like her will expose this nation to attack and destruction by all the dark forces running around blowing up people, by the dozen. Harry Reid is no better. His infamous “the war is lost” speech not only exposed him as a cretin, because he was hopelessly wrong, but also indicated the lengths he and Pelosi will go for purely political purposes! These two are essentially traitors who should be summarily cast out of Congress, by American voters. In another country, less kind than this one, they would be tried for treason.I cannot believe Americans will allow these egregious idiots to be re-elected in November? And adding Obama to that pair will sink the ship comprehensively! He’s cut from the same leftist, defeatist cloth as they are. Please people, wake up! America needs leaders who are strong, determined to defend this country against all who would attack it, or our allies, and committed to maintaining the free market systems and private capital ownership that made the US great! The Dem leadership is bent on making America militarily weak via their pathetic pacifism and on destroying the economy via their belief in fairy stories. Another Dem congress and president would also introduce Socialism on a large scale too? This cannot be permitted to come to pass. I cant believe that people want petro jobs and money to stay in this country, cause hardships to other countries making them fund their own activities ie terrorism etc etc by drilling more in the USA. Lets all just pay 10 bucks a gallon or stay home and just wait until all the greens save the world. In just a short time (with current progress)those who know better than we little people will have the whole world living in peace and harmony oh yah and carbon free. Come on people we need it all and we needed it 10, 20 or 30 years ago-so lets just be good sheep, cant we all just get along ? Unbelievable. I’m a working man. Working men need oil. It’s a simple situation. We need to drill for oil and gas. Queenie Pelosi wants to arrogantly wield dictatorial power to feed her ego. As Marie Antoinette said, “Let them eat cake!” Well, the same for Pelosi who is now on vacation and my family and I had to cancel ours because of her and her idiotic pea-brain mentality — she shuts down the cameras and turns the lights out. This is despicable behavior by any congressman whom, incidentally, I pay for. These bums work for me, I don’t work for them! It’s time to turn her lights out! Working men need oil, I need oil!The media (except you guys, Fox & Rush) only want to air the “Bush Bashing”. Funny how the demos are saying “change we can believe in” when the only change they have brought about since taking control in ’07 is one financial disaster after another! Then they turn around and blame it all on Bush. How much audacity does that take?!! It’s time for change alright; let’s hope the American people wake up and get this country back to what we had for the last 7 of 8 years in a row… a THRIVING ECONOMY! Hopefully Fox will get their cameras rolling and let the people know what’s going on right now! Show them the truth! Show them how the Demos don’t care if they can afford to drive to work! Show them how the Demos would rather go on one of their many extravagant vacations (that they can all EASILY afford thanks to the hard-working American taxpayers) than to bring about a resolution for the American people?s livelihood and welfare! SHOW THEM and TELL THEM THE TRUTH that NEVER gets told on ABC, CBS, CNN, NBC! Vote the Demos out so we get it all changed back to the way it was! Good grief, soon they will want to change our motto to “In Obama We Trust”! Heaven knows they want to take God out for good. Hopefully, the people will once again see through all the media’s predisposition to persuade, promote and progress liberal propaganda, and rise up and vote the Demos out for good? for the good of the American people. Drill, Drill, Drill now.

Good to see Confederate Wanker still has the conservative action plan handy.

“When confronted with a crisis, you must (1) wet pants in fear and (2) commence whining.”

Jesus Christ, when Glenn Reynolds calls you an over-reacting idiot, you’ve clearly gone waaaay over the bend.

Hey Gavin, OT but I think you need to sharpen your Photoshop skills to work this into your next Daffy Ab Hugh (sp?) post:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/7538510.stm

Wow, just had my first WCEE (wordpress-comment-eating-event)

anyway, i was saying, Gaving, OT but you should work this into your next Daffy post somehow:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/7538510.stm

My blog’s locked out too, as is alicublog. Obviouslu there’s a conspiracy against bloggers who make fun of conservatives.

But this blog works–that’s very suspicious. Are we sure that Sadly, No! isn’t part of the conspiracty?!?

My keyboard is also part of the conspiracy–it keeps throwing in odd letters and leaving others out.

I blame Rush Limbaugh.

[…] News » News News Being A Chronicle Of The Sad Decline Of Confederate Yankee2008-08-02 08:14:02Turning Nancy Pelosi and the … as Republicans continued to debate energy policy […]

I see TIDOS Wankee and the Congressional Rethuglicans maintain the high standards for which they are justly famous.

According to Atrios, sitemeter is to blame.

Well, someone pissed in Gary’s cheeto bowl.

Nancy Pelosi and House Democrats fled the House of Representatives, turning off the microphones and the lights as Republicans continued to debate energy policy without them.

We’ve come a long way from the Downing Street Memo basement meeting and Tom Delay sending Homeland Security after the Democrats, haven’t we?

And from the days when the Republicans were screeching that Democrats hated families because they were going to make the representatives show up for more than three days a week.

Sort of.

But this blog works–that’s very suspicious. Are we sure that Sadly, No! isn’t part of the conspiracty?!?

It’s well known that Sadly, No is actually part of the Burt Prelutsky media empire.

I demand to know why Gary Ruppert’s comment didn’t get eaten up by WordPress. A McInsane Brown Shirt conspiratorial censorship operation to preserve conservatoid ramblings and disappear the words of liberals? That’s the most reasonable explanation.

And now a few words from our sponsor-kitty.

Damn it, wordpress! Pick on some gary your own size.

I’m just kind of bummed that I keep ending up actually on this guy’s site. I need to just read the post here and not click on the link. Makes me want to wash out my computer, and that would be bad. In the “Ghostbusters” sense of the word.

Wow, that’s what must’ve happened to my blog when the wingers started really hating me. Good thing I still just don’t give a shit.

Why does Sitemeter hate the Internet so much? According to Not Atrios, apparently Sitemeter rolled out an upgrade or patch or something yesterday which conflicts with Internet Exploiter. I, a virtuous Firefox user, have experienced no outages nor have I ever had a comment eaten by Worthless WordPress. In short, neener neener.

Johnny Coelacanth said,

August 2, 2008 at 16:26

Why does Sitemeter hate the Internet so much? According to Not Atrios, apparently Sitemeter rolled out an upgrade or patch or something yesterday which conflicts with Internet Exploiter. I, a virtuous Firefox user, have experienced no outages nor have I ever had a comment eaten by Worthless WordPress. In short, neener neener.

I use Firefox as well and had no problems with blog outages… however, WordPress still hates me.

I can’t get here on Firefox this a.m. It gets hung up on the sitemeter thing. I had to use Safari, in which WordPress hates me, but it doesn’t hate me in Firefox. As if I know anything about these confounded InternetsTubes.

I can’t get here on Firefox this a.m. It gets hung up on the sitemeter thing.

I’ve had that happen several times over the last few months, so for me it had nothing to do with this disastrous update they did.

Teh Sadly is working fine for me today, or at least as well as it ever does.

“I can’t get here on Firefox this a.m. It gets hung up on the sitemeter thing”

Weird. I’m using Firefox right now. Are you using 3.0.1?

At any rate, even the liberal New York Times is wondering if Google is suppressing teh noble anti-Obama bloggers.

Did Google use its network of online services to silence critics of Barack Obama? That was the question buzzing on a corner of the blogosphere over the last few days, after several anti-Obama bloggers were unable to update their sites, which are hosted on Google’s Blogger service.

Carissa Snedeker, of Silver Springs, Nevada, whose Blue Lyon blog was affected by the temporary freeze, says she doesn’t buy Google’s answer and still believes that Obama supporters “flagged” her blog. Yet she is mostly upset at Google.

“What frustrated me was that Blogger didn’t give us the benefit of the doubt,” said Ms. Snedeker, adding that she has been publishing her blog for three years. “It would have taken a human five seconds to figure out we are not spam,” she said. Her blog is now hosted on WordPress.

He then said “I am a Democrat and here is my energy plan” and he held up a picture of an old VW Bug with a sail attached to it. He paraded around he house floor with the sign while the crowd cheered.

You Republicans are just jealous that people stopped listening to your grand idea of “stacking corpses” as a means of Energy policy.

As if I know anything about these confounded InternetsTubes.

The saddest thing about the recent indictment is that it threatens to deprive the Senate of its internets doyen. Who will explain intertubularity to us if Stevens is gone?

Drat. Here’s teh link to the NYT tech blog which posted that story.

Wait–that huge Gary Ruppert paragraph *isn’t* from a Malfunctioning Robot (TM)? Does that mean I don’t have to read it?

Wait a minute. So ConWank is all, ‘I have some meager anecdotal evidence that Obamanazis are shutting down the wingnut intertoobz’ and then Instafuckwit is all, ‘I have some meager anecdotal evidence that no they’re not’ and then ConWank is like, ‘The big bossman has given me my marching orders. I will now put my tail between my legs!’

That about it?

“Wait–that huge Gary Ruppert paragraph *isn’t* from a Malfunctioning Robot (TM)?”

I thought it was a joke too. But it’s too unhinged and sincere sounding. I call real* Gary.

*your mileage may vary

They don’t call him the Blogfather for nothing.

But in general I like the idea of the Republicans getting used to be a clownish, abused, disrespected, unlistened-to minority in Congress.

“whiny”, don’t forget “whiny”, El Cid.

“whiny”, don’t forget “whiny”, El Cid.

I can’t speak for El Cid but I took “whiny” as a given. They’re whiny regardless of whether they’re a minority.

I see TIDOS Wankee and the Congressional Rethuglicans maintain the high standards for which they are justly famous.

My guess is that he is predominantly a Wanker rather than a Wankee.

Shorter Yankee: It sucks being on the losing team, and there isn’t enough tissue in the fucking world to dry my tears.

Oh, and to all the folks being abused by WordPress: for the love of God, when are you going to learn to copy your text before hitting “post”?

Me, the wordpress issue isn’t having your comment deleted…it’s having it sent into moderation, never to reappear until after the rest of the world has moved on.

Johnny Coelacanth: I have Firefox version 2.0.0.8 (hey, that’s what year this is!). I’ve been advised to upgrade. Anyway, it’s working fine w/ S,N now.

Here’s a couple small facts for Gary Ruppert and I won’t even write an endless paragraph. The U.S. has 3% of the world’s oil reserves. The U.S. consumes 20% of the world’s oil production. Try to do the math, wingnut. Even T. Boone Pickens will tell you, “we can’t drill our way out of this”.

As someone who has spent about 30 years in the “awl bidness”, I would suggest that if Mr. ruppert wants to drill so bad he should give a call to Transocean or Diamond Offshore and attempt to secure the services of a drilling rig. He might find out there ain’t none available. They’re all working right now…drilling.

We’re working on the moderation bug, trying to turn off the ‘moderation’ function entirely.

I’m only catching two or three comments a day in that queue, as opposed to the spam queue, but Seb, Brad, et al. are also manually rescuing comments, so I have no idea how many it’s grabbing in total.

Is there a links per comment threshold set up now, Gavin? If there is and I know it, then I can try to remember to stay under it.

Great, thanks for the picture of the Nazis, Cuntfederate Dickyanker. Feel free to blame the liberal conspiracy the split second the internet tubes do something you don’t understand. That should make it about once every three seconds.

Me, the wordpress issue isn’t having your comment deleted…it’s having it sent into moderation

Okie-doke. I guess I misunderstood the issue.

The new spam catcher is also much more accurate than it was at first.

The spam has been incredible lately, btw. There’s a constant heavy drizzle spiked with downpours of about 10 messages per minute — about as fast as you can hit ‘select-all’ and ‘delete’ and refresh the screen. But it’s necessary to go through all the message to make super-sure there aren’t any falsely-flagged real ones in the queue, etc.

Anyway, believe me, we’re just as inconvenienced as anyone else. I’m in there twenty times a day, and I know someone else is in there a lot of the times when I’m not.

Is all this spam coming being generated by just a few crap ass companies?

for the love of God, when are you going to learn to copy your text before hitting “post”?

Hey, I do! But-but-but it hurts my feelings when that rude comment pops up and then I have to refresh the page and post it again! And sometimes even again after that! Somebody call the waaahhmbulance!

A links-per-comment threshold? Well, the system is sort of a black box. It’s designed so that it will err on the side of flagging at first, and will ‘learn’ what’s really spam as comments are (manually) de-flagged. I didn’t know this until I started wrestling with it last week.

There probably isn’t a hard, inflexible threshold for links, but it seems to grow suspicious, at this point, of comments with more than one. The irony of course is that if people don’t challenge the spam definitions, the system won’t ‘learn.’

I just wish it paid more attention to the sender. Then it would take a single manual ‘not spam’ decision and people would have carte blanche to do anything they wanted…

Is all this spam coming being generated by just a few crap ass companies?

Most of it is from a single company! It’s hitting each post in turn with X number of spams, then apparently turning around and doing it again.

Wait, I’ll go find one.

They’re actually pretty impressive as postmodern poetry, what with the sheer number of them and the disposability of the objet d’art, the ‘death of the author,’ the fragmentation of meaning, and so on down the line. Not that no one has ever thought of that before.

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Spaminess: 99% | 2008-08-02 18:05:31 | Post: Dammit, Malkin, I Don’t Even Know What You’re Pretending to be Outraged About Anymore +

My comment got deleted. But I guess I used some bad words — “stupid” and “braindead” and “Look before you leap”. I guess that is withering language to be disappeared in ConYan world

Thanks for the info. But then pushing the system to make it learn from this end (the commenters’) will make much work at your end (the site proprietors’).

webkinz cheat codes

My Cheeky Dog needs snacks now and I’m all out of Kinzcash! Gimme the cheat codes!

It’s obviously a lefty plot, ’cause I haven’t had any trouble accessing my blog.

Must just be those evil warmonger blogs.

Hmmm. I honestly don’t see this as a bug, but rather as a feature.

Yay Google…

mikey

CY is right about EVERYTHING….

http://www.observer.com/2008/media/soldiers-charged-conspiracy-murder-iraqi-detainees-are-tnr-diarist-scott-beauchamps-compa

EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!!!

There are some pretty funny comments over there. My fave: “Stop blogging, you ignorant cracker.” It’s also hilarious, that the self-assured CY fan-boys shut right the fuck up when it was discovered (yet again) that they are all drooling idiots.

pwned. I hate it when I forget to switch my screen name back.

My comment got deleted. But I guess I used some bad words — “stupid” and “braindead” and “Look before you leap”. I guess that is withering language to be disappeared in ConYan world

Not on this issue, but another a while back:

“I promise your head will NOT explode if you admit you made a mistake!”.

Deleted…

Touchy soul.

How does one go about hiring a spammer? I’ve got a garage full of giant penis geeble gobble I need to move…

Insane cock brother.

Hmmm, that reminds me of a song.

“Andy Roddick Bulge” is a great name for a band, IMO.

So Gavin, I should stop posting those? I just was under the impression that everybody needed as much cheap Viagra as I did.

I can’t access Democratic Underground today. Googlag KonSPEARasy!

So Gavin, I should stop posting those? I just was under the impression that everybody needed as much cheap Viagra as I did.

Oh, the Viagra is fine. It’s the Hentai Horse Cock Payday Loans that are getting a bit heavy in the air.

Like, do we not all have one of those already? I mean.

I can’t access Democratic Underground today.

I haven’t been by there in years – I guess last time I looked, it had a lot of gushing about how John McCain should be Kerry’s VP pick.

I found that site sort of comforting long ago, like in early 2002 when the country was still balls-out gibbering crazy and DU seemed like sanity. Even with the dozens of numerology threads and stuff. After a while, the kneejerk paranoia – pretty much the flip side of CY’s here – got to me. Is it still the same madhouse it always was?

Yuh-huh, Blogger going pear-shaped is EXACTLY like the Stormtroopers making barbecues out of Camus & Dostoevsky & Twain – no doubt whatsoever about it. Put your ear up to the screen, & you can actually seem to hear the Horst-Wessel-Lied yowling eerily out at you. No, really.

Okay, really not.
I find it a mite wacky that many of the blogophiles decrying this heinous leftist cyber-plot also have proclaimed their intention to switch (or have already) … to WordPress … the same one that blows goats, betrayed Jesus, threw the 1912 World Series, ate the last piece of chocolate cake & shot JFK. Pardon my confusion, but uh,what da foock?!?

Spam should be a crime – one punished with prohibitively long terms of hard labour, under a “One Strike You’re Out” law. THAT shite is de facto censorship, since time wasted deleting & sifting through it is time stolen from reading worthy material. A bonafide dictatorship of the idiotariat, & the motherfuckers that do it are doing it for literally a penny or three at a time. Floods of it probably mean that their pimps have cut their per-unit rates.

It’s the Hentai Horse Cock Payday Loans that are getting a bit heavy in the air.

OK… I’ll save those for an emergency…

And remember, ladies and gentlemen, with every short-term loan of $200.00 or more, you get an original, SIGNED Hentai Horse Cock Poster. Signed by the artist AND the Horse.

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Why our Spam Filter aren’t learning??

mikey

“We’ll know for certain by seeing whether he deletes the hilarious comments mocking the post”

Yes, he deleted mine even though I was just trying to be helpful and suggest that he retool and set up the blog as a Dune fan site called Butlerian Jihad Watch. Now, he just posted a comment in which he says that a New York Times article convinced him that these Obama bloggers are up to something. Yes, he is citing the NYT now. The publication that they think tried to get Donald Rumsfeld killed by publishing a fluff piece on his vacation home. This must be a bad day for him.

Jeez, back in my day hentai horse cock payday loans spam offered signed hentai horse cocks. In 3D. It’s just been downhill ever since they elected Taft.

Oh god. It just occurred to me that Yankee in that picture looks like an inbred version of Daniel Craig. Maybe he can play Jim-Bob Bondy, Redneck Spy and Non-Womanizer.

Hey:

Mr. Free Speech Defender himself deleted my comment about what a good conservative he is.

And now I can’t leave comments. I get a message saying that the post isn’t open for comments.

Should I give him the benefit of the doubt and attribute it to a technical error? Or should I just jump in with the Nazi book-burning comparisons?

WordPress loves me in IE, but I can’t access Orcinus or World-O-Crap with IE.

This is a pain in the ass. I like to skip about merrily from site to site. Why do the innertubes hate me?!?!11/1!

Also, a recent wind storm blew my grill over. Can y’all help a sister out?

I guess I should mention that this entire episode cements his standing as very good conservative.

Congratulations, CY.

Mr. Free Speech Defender himself deleted my comment about what a good conservative he is.

And now I can’t leave comments. I get a message saying that the post isn’t open for comments.

Yeah, I love it when wingnut bloggers yell about liberals threatening free speech—and then delete every comment that disagrees with them. Meanwhile, conservative idiots like ruppert remain her at S,N! , ripe targets for mockery.

Speaking of comments – heres Wankee hisself at the end of the thread for that post:

Why are Obama supporters thought to be responsible? Why not right wingers, possibly reprising Nixonian dirty tricks?

Frankly? Because they were though(sic) to have been behind a similar situation noted in this article in the New York Times. At the time, anti-Obama blogs were thought have been targeted on Blogspot roughly a month ago, and Google “would not explicitly rebut the idea that it had been tricked” with he(sic) blog shutdowns. When emails started coming in again yesterday that another round of shutdowns were hitting anti-Obama blogs on Blogspot, it was easy to make the assumption that the culprits were back up to their old tricks.

That assumption turned out to be wrong, for which I apologized.

Wow. A month ago there was a brouhaha about Blogger “shutting down” anti-Obama blogs. Because Google “would not explicitly rebut the idea that it had been tricked” – obviously they were guilty of silencing free speech and criticism of The One. He’s only apologized because this situation, exactly the same as last time is somehow different.

In a couple weeks he’ll probably be wondering why he apologized – because by then it’ll be yet another incident in Google’s long running campaign in support of the ObamFührer

Well, I think it’s perfectly understandable that Mr. Yankee would delete comments and close off debate because you liberals weren’t being politically correct enough and you offended him.

I mean “civil”! You weren’t being “civil”!

Two totally different things! And one is OK and the other isn’t based on a totally consistent and reasonable set of criteria!

Liberals. Hmf.

This must be a bad day for him.

No shit. This is being roundly mocked absolutely everywhere, by which I mean the blogs I read.

Are you sure that the one about short declamation pieces is spam?

I can’t get cellphone transmission through the canyon. I blame Obama supporters.

My satellite TV sometimes goes fritzy. I blame Obama supporters.

They haven’t denied it.

The Politico Crypt piece is worth reading for the updates. More than just the wind-power VW bug (I think it had a Darwin Fish on it too).

Right at the stroke of five Georgia Rep. Tom Price announced that House Republicans were ending their impromptu protest on the floor of the chamber, ending a five-plus hour rebellion with a round of “God Bless America.”

Well, congrats to the [R]’s that stayed until 5 PM when they could have knocked off early, but I am not surprised that they could not stay one minute later.

BONUS: Since it’s Politico – the comment thread is well populated with die-hard 28%’ers – and it’s approaching Future History Zombie Thread in length. It’s even populated with what appear to be parody trolls:

BUSH WHERE ARE YOU. DECLARE MARTIAL LAW AND GIVE THE REPUBLICANS IN THE HOUSE A VENUE FOR THEIR GRANDSTANDING

Posted By: | August 01, 2008 at 01:13 PM

Teh Awesum.

Meanwhile, conservative idiots like ruppert remain her at S,N!

Gary went through with the sex change?

The thread at Politico – re: Pelosi’s Politburo is LONG (1916 at the time I checked) but it’s so rich in comedy gold that you can just select a spot at random and find a howler within a couple of comments:

Maybe a new title for Pelosi should be “Dictator of the House”. I have never seen such a blatant abuse of power in the House. The Dems are WRONG.

Posted By: JimC. | August 01, 2008 at 03:47 PM

Yes. How dare the Speaker of the House adjourn the House on the same day that had been scheduled for months now?

Or how about the Grand Unified Omnibus of Wing-itude:

We have to defeat these communists!.. There I said it!.. Someone has to. The Democrats are COMMUNISTS and they must be defeated. Universal Healthcare!, Trillions in taxes!, Military Budget Cuts (except when they want to add SPINACH!), Promoting Defeat in Iraq!, Constitutional Rights for Terrorists!, NO DRILLING!, Property Confiscation, Anti-Gun 2nd Amendment, The Fairness Doctrine (which doesns’t include the print or tv media) Anti-1st Amendment.. etc.. and these people call themselves Americans!.. are they Kidding me!.. My family didn’t fight in wars and die for a communist takeover via the political process b.c. the U.S. Military and the 2nd Amendment protect us… Go McCain!

Posted By: Rob | August 01, 2008 at 07:08 PM

I don’t know why they’re blaming Obama. I heard it was the Lamont campaign.

I wish there was a rule that before you could use words like communist or fascist in a public forum you had to learn what it actually meant.

And real, genuine sanctions for getting it wrong.

C’mon, it’s not like that’s a terrible burden. Knowing what the words you are using actually mean? Seems like maybe just a minimum requirement…

mikey

Why stop at communist and fascist?

How about liberal? Leftist? Extreme leftist?

Activist judges? Traitor? Treason? Radical?

Islamofascism? Political correctness? Feminazi?

The right-wing rag I work for used the word “Islamofascism” in a front page promo for a book review in the Religion section. It is so embarrassing to work here some times.

…except when they want to add SPINACH!

I was unaware that Communists were using spinach to subvert America.

“Fascist” doesn’t mean “anyone I disagree with”?

Spinach?

Islamocommiefascisthomomexifemispinachism must be defeated, or else!

I note that CF apologized but left the photo of Nazi bookburning in place, just for those who do not read to the bottom of the post.

McCain Green Screen – ‘Super McCain Bros’.

“Spinach?”

Indeed. Popeye hates America.

I took some “Laura”* brand generic anti-depressants, and now I feel better.

* Sold by the Carlyle Group and Bu$hco Enterprises.

You’re right, Hoosier. They could really simplify all their complicated name-that-enemy-of-freedom-and-democracy if they just substituted the word “boogyman”…

mikey

except when they want to add SPINACH

That spinach thing is going to bother me all day long. What does he mean? Is spinach some new slang for benefits?

I love spinach, with a splash of apple cider vinegar and diced hard-boiled eggs. Does this make me a communist? Maybe so. I, for one, welcome our spinach-adding overlords.

Anti-Gun 2nd Amendment

The 2nd Amendment is anti-gun? Wha?

Well, perhaps that is the “Universal Right Wing Forgiveness Clause”…

See, if you spout anything they see as lefty, or “commie”, they hate you and want to kill or imprison you.

The secret code, however, is if you also want to add spinach. This dood gave it away. They’re gonna be pissed.

Let’s give it a try, shall we?

I think we ought to impeach dick cheney for war crimes. But first I think we should add spinach!

Yep. That oughta do it…

mikey

Military Budget Cuts (except when they want to add SPINACH!)

Seriously. This guy has to be a parody troll.

Re: The spinach thing… I’m just taking a stab at it, but the genius might be referring to this story.

Or not. The rant isn’t exactly coherent.

“The right-wing rag I work for used the word “Islamofascism” in a front page promo for a book review in the Religion section. It is so embarrassing to work here some times.”

However, you might be the perfect candidate to bring the whole thing down from the inside.

By “spinach” the poster seems to mean something like “pork”. Perhaps he uses it because Democrats, as radical Muslim sympathizers and hippie vegans (according to him) don’t like pork?

That makes absolutely no sense, but I can’t think of any interpretation that does. I’m guessing that the link two posts above is the correct answer.

… you might be the perfect candidate to bring the whole thing down from the inside.

I try. I do the wire pages. When I have time, I edit Nedra Pickler’s items into news stories.

He pulled my post which went like this:

I have received information that Confederate Yankee rapes and kills young boys at his NAMBLA hideout.

Correction: Apparently the NAMBLA thing is inaccurate, but it could have been true.

It’s not just spinach. Seriously, anywhere in the 1977 comment long thread is within half a dozen comments of a winner:

eg. This S,N! post is 8:02 today:

The Year of the Rope will solve this issue. Americans: Decide now, which end of the Rope is to be yours?

Posted By: Misterfixit | August 02, 2008 at 08:06 AM

The previous post, Debbie the Sack Kicker Schlussel is 12:28

OK folks- let us keep this GOING!! If you want to see our country run properly, and not stolen and destroyed by a bunch of despotic evil swine democrat *****s, keep the pressure on them- not only by pestering congress- but put pressure on the brain dead twits who for some unholy reason continue to support the pary apparatus: Boycott democrats in your neighborhoods. If you know a business person who is a dem (a productive dem? actually, a few exist) tell them you will be glad to shop in their establishment when the threat to freedom has been removed- and do not go back until pelosi and company have been censured and removed from office for dereliction of duty and treason. If YOU are a business person- do not answer calls for help from democrats. Let their toilets stop up and overflow. Let theri refrigerators sit broken. Do not deliver their groceries to them. Do not fix their cars. Do not write prescriptions to them….we THE PEOPLE can prevail over these evil god damned swine!!

Posted By: rimple dwimple | August 02, 2008 at 12:32 AM

It’s like two or three weeks of Freepi stitched together into one long bit of crazy.

Oh, and here’s another obvious parody troll:

this is a stalinist tactic. the bolsheviks leave and the mensheviks are left in the dark again.

Posted By: a.b. normal | August 02, 2008 at 08:52 PM

“I have received information that Confederate Yankee rapes and kills young boys at his NAMBLA hideout.

Correction: Apparently the NAMBLA thing is inaccurate, but it could have been true.”

It would be irresponsible not to speculate … ! … oh dear God, is THAT what he’s been grilling in his backyard?! CHILDREN???//?

I too had my comment yanked, because I dared to correct him on his use of Occam’s Razor in one of his replies (which he subsequently edited out without saying so).

Of course, I also told him he needed to grow a pair and actually own up to his f*ck-up instead of offering a weak mea culpa and blaming his rash pronouncements on some anonymous emailers. Talk about a total tool…

From The Department Of Unnecessary Information Department–

I keep trying but I’m too goddamn stoned.

Dirty bastard…racist scum…chinless douche…

There.

That’ll show ‘im. Chinless…douche…

I found that site sort of comforting long ago, like in early 2002 when the country was still balls-out gibbering crazy and DU seemed like sanity. Even with the dozens of numerology threads and stuff. After a while, the kneejerk paranoia – pretty much the flip side of CY’s here – got to me. Is it still the same madhouse it always was?

Sam, its still a barrel-load of crazy over there. Top 10 Repub. Idiots is still a laugh now and again, but the rest is kind of our equivalent of CY and his ilk. I occasionally lurk, but usually its too depressing.

I occasionally lurk, but usually its too depressing.

Thanks for the update. It seems like that place is the repository for all the weirdness that infects leftie discussion boards. FDL has gotten a bit like that, but somehow has kept it more or less under control – maybe through the commenters’ greeting / flattering posts drowning it out.

If you want to make your spam into something interesting but spam poems leave you cold, you might want to try out the EnBW Spamrecycler.

Like Grandpa said: when life hands you shit, grow roses.

John McCain
he crashed a plane
or rather, he crashed three.
The first
a splash!
Was quite a day
Jet underwater
Corpus Christi Bay.
The next
In Spain
Powerlines – a shattered plane.
Look, they said
just for fun.
Is the twice-crashed pilot
really an admiral’s son?
The record shows
that yes, indeed
McCain’s own dad
was a Navy VP!
Two jets down
why wasn’t he grounded?
A football game!
His heart, it pounded.
Army-Navy game in Philly
Public transportation’s silly
So to the game alone he flew
in a Navy jet paid for by you
Engine trouble
flyboy down
Plane number 3
impacts the ground.
He would go on
to lose more two
A carrier mishap
anti-aircraft fire
Crashes, however, these were not
so we oughtn’t blame the arrogant snot

Looks like he deleted a whole slew of critical comments, closing down the thread with this bit of sophsitry:

Posted by: Ken Lowery at August 2, 2008 11:03 AM
Why are Obama supporters thought to be responsible? Why not right wingers, possibly reprising Nixonian dirty tricks?

Frankly? Because they were though to have been behind a similar situation noted in this article in the New York Times. At the time, anti-Obama blogs were thought have been targeted on Blogspot roughly a month ago, and Google “would not explicitly rebut the idea that it had been tricked” with he blog shutdowns. When emails started coming in again yesterday that another round of shutdowns were hitting anti-Obama blogs on Blogspot, it was easy to make the assumption that the culprits were back up to their old tricks.

That assumption turned out to be wrong, for which I apologized.

Note the subtle use of the passive voice? “Thought to have been” this, ‘thought to have been” that. The best is that he uses a NY Times article about a previous blog-freeze to support his “assumption” … an article that actually explains that it was a Google problem.

Meanwhile, the unchanged headline and supersize Nazi book-burning picture remain front and center.