Beyond Fucking Parody

So it’s come to this: Americans may not vote for Obama because he eats well and he exercises. No, really:

Too Fit to Be President?
Facing an Overweight Electorate, Barack Obama Might Find Low Body Fat a Drawback
By AMY CHOZICK
August 1, 2008; Page W1

Speaking to donors at a San Diego fund-raiser last month, Barack Obama reassured the crowd that he wouldn’t give in to Republican tactics to throw his candidacy off track.

“Listen, I’m skinny but I’m tough,” Sen. Obama said.

But in a nation in which 66% of the voting-age population is overweight and 32% is obese, could Sen. Obama’s skinniness be a liability? Despite his visits to waffle houses, ice-cream parlors and greasy-spoon diners around the country, his slim physique just might have some Americans wondering whether he is truly like them.

A few points:

  • This isn’t the Journal’s op-ed page. Rather, it appeared in their weekend section. This is allegedly a “news” feature.
  • Are you fucking kidding me. Obama is now being criticized for not being a colossal fat-ass. That’s funny, because the right just loves to ridicule Al Gore and Michael Moore as colossal fat-asses. But Obama? He’s not a colossal fat-ass so that sucks too!!! For past precedent of this sort of thing, I refer you to the 1872 Supreme Court decision of the Rubber v. Glue case.
  • No, seriously: are you fucking kidding me.

And yes, there is more:

According to Sen. Obama’s Chicago physician David Scheiner, the senator works out regularly, jogs up to three miles a day when he can, and has “no excess body fat.”

Dr. Scheiner didn’t disclose his patient’s exact weight, but medical observers estimate that the 6-foot-1.5-inch-tall senator appears to weigh at least 10 pounds less than the roughly 190 pounds that the average American man of his height weighs. The Obama campaign declined to comment for this article.

Though Sen. McCain cannot lift weights due to injuries he suffered as a prisoner of war in Vietnam, he “walked the Grand Canyon rim to rim in August 2006” and hikes whenever he can find the time, according to John D. Eckstein, an internist in Scottsdale, Ariz., who treats Sen. McCain. At roughly 165 pounds, his weight is slightly above average for a 5-foot-7-inch man his age, according to nutritionists.

So: McCain is in worse shape than Obama and it’s not because he’s OOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLD… it’s because he’s tough! And he was a POW! And while Obama is lifting sissy-ass weights with his pals in Europe, McCain is hiking the Grand Canyon while eating apple pie!

Can we get any stupider? I mean that as a serious question.

But too much time in the gym can cause problems, as Sen. Obama learned last month after he made three stops to local Chicago gyms in one day, for a total of 188 minutes. The marathon workout session sparked a widely circulated Associated Press article titled “Obama Becomes a Gym Rat.” In it, the reporter wrote, “Sometimes it’s hard to tell if Barack Obama is running for president of the United States or Mr. Universe.”

Republicans have recently picked up on the senator’s fitness regimen. On Wednesday, the McCain campaign launched a new ad titled “Celeb” that compares Sen. Obama to Paris Hilton and Britney Spears. In a memo to reporters explaining the ad, McCain campaign manager Rick Davis wrote, “Only celebrities like Barack Obama go to the gym three times a day.”

Plus, I hear he windsurfs.

In case you guys were wondering why I felt so down yesterday, it’s because articles like this one keep popping up in our mainstream press corps. It’s like the bastards have learned nothing from the past eight years and are happily going along with the GOP’s identity-based smears yet again. Just shoot me.


Gavin adds: Oh, but stay alive for a couple more minutes, because the Amy Chozick Affair just got a lot stupider

 

Comments: 144

 
 
 

I suppose Obama really should be taking out his stress not at the gym but by guzzling malt liquor and smoking blunts.

If i were Obama’s chief adviser I would tell him to show up at his next presser wearing a big giant clock around his neck. Just to fuck with the idiots. This may be one reason he hasn’t hired me so far.

 
 

Sorry, Brad. I’d read your post, but “Ouch, My Balls!” is on the picture box.

 
 

Everything is a liability when you’re a Dem. Being too fat, too skinny, too smart, too dumb, too young, too old, too rich, too poor, too good looking, too ugly, too optimistic, too pessimistic, etc. Why one might almost think the media doesn’t like liberals…

 
 

That article is so fucking stupid, I can’t believe it hasn’t caused the world to self-destruct into a black hole of stupidity.

And I realize that probably means there will be even stupider articles before this is over. We still have months to go.

 
 

[…] and weights of Obama, McCain, W and other Presidents. I found this via Kevin Drum but the crew at Sadly, No does an excellent job “analyzing” it. I mean really Amy Chozick, is this what you dreamed of writing when you got in to journalism? […]

 
 

Thers is on to something: Barack Obama has failed to learn from The Nutty Professor.

 
Yaoi Huntress Earth
 

This is just grasping for straws. That’s all.

 
 

As a fat guy, I’m thrilled to find out that fat is the new “it” thing. Now I’ll be able to win Britney and Paris away from that skinny Negro, Obama, who’s making a play for them, or so I hear….

 
Leon Trotsky, Exile-in-Mexico
 

And here, I would think having a presidential candidate that takes care of himself would be an inspiration to the assorted fat-ass motherfuckers in the electorate to get off their duff and fucking exercise.

But nah, let’s make it a negative so you can keep eating shit, America.

Anyway, I agree with Yaoi here, this is just one more grasp at straws. Next they’ll be complaining about the pearly white teeth Obama has, and the brazen insult it is to our noble British-American families and their ugly fucking teeth.

Obama may also have such nice teeth the better to eat us with, of course.

 
Craig Pennington
 

Can we get any stupider? I mean that as a serious question.

You mean it as a serious question, but the US media will read it as a serious challenge!

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

The range of “normal” BMI is 20-25
At 6′ 1.5″ and 190 lbs, Obama has a BMI of 24.7

As for tall and lanky presidents, “you might have to go back to Abraham Lincoln” in 1860, says presidential historian Stephen Hess. “Most presidents were sort of in the middle.”

Fuck. Could this be more wrong?
The current occupant is 6′ 0″ and 190 lbs
His dad’s about the same height, and had a problem with bulimia.
Reagan – 6’1″ and 190 lbs
LBJ – 6′ 3″ I don’t know what he tipped the scales at, but he don’t look like he was fat to me.
JFK – 6′ 1″ and 175 lbs

So yeah – Clenis was a bit chubby and Carter was a bit short.

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

Too early to close tags.

 
t Winslow Howell
 

I, for one, will never vote for someone who has “no excess body fat”. Nor will I vote for someone who ” hikes whenever he can find the time”.

Ron Paul, or maybe Ralph Nader, will get my vote this election.

 
t Winslow Howell
 

Sorry, meant to say, –
Serious leaders like Ron Paul or Ralph Nader will get my vote…

Enough of this silliness already.

 
 

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Why the F*** did we not hear this about His Royal Highness George W. Clearing Brush Avid Bike Rider & Supposed Pretzel Choker Bush Jr?

Bush promotes fitness, goes biking

USA Today | 5/05/2007

BELTSVILLE, Md. (AP) — Just before climbing on his mountain bike Saturday, President Bush urged people to get up off their couches and walk, jog, pedal and swim.

“It doesn’t take much time to stay fit — 30 minutes, five days a week,” Bush said at a Secret Service training facility just outside Washington where he went for a bike ride.

May is National Physical Fitness and Sports Month, and June will mark the fifth anniversary of the HealthierUS Initiative. The president launched the initiative in 2002 to encourage people to do physical activity every day, eat nutritious food, get preventive screenings for disease and make healthy lifestyle choices.

“I love exercise,” said the president, who was wearing navy biking shorts and a green T-shirt. Before he left for the ride, he lifted up his blue-and-white mountain bike to prove he was strong and fit.

…Bush traded in his running shoes for mountain bikes about three years ago after pain in his knees kept him from jogging. At 60, he is a devoted mountain bike rider, regularly leaving the White House for rides on Saturday mornings or after church on Sundays.

Most of his cycling is at Beltsville, but he also bikes occasionally at the Marine base at Quantico, Va., Camp David at Catoctin Mountain Park and at his ranch at Crawford, Texas. He also sneaks in rides during presidential trips.

As he delivered his statement on exercise, Bush gave a rare glimpse of the wooded area in which he cycles. He typically rides his bike out of the media’s view.

Bush has a six-day-a-week exercise regimen that includes pedaling his mountain bike at up to 18 miles an hour for 15 miles to 20 miles a week, according to his last physical examination, in August 2006. He also does low-impact “hill work” on a treadmill and free weight resistance training and stretching.

 
 

Love the helpful illustration included with the story, including the relative height and weight of various presidents/candidates. Of course, Clinton is shown jogging, pasty white thighs and all, and Obama looks ready for a pick-up game on some city playground, complete with the requisite basketball, but Bush and St. BBQ are shown in suits.

No hidden agenda there at all.

 
 

And I realize that probably means there will be even stupider articles before this is over. We still have months to go.

Oh yeah. The real Swift Boating of Senator Obama will not start until after the convention. And then…the ugliness will probably be unprecedented.

 
 

Check out the art accompanying the article. Two of these things are not like the others.

 
ananagryoldbroad
 

I hate to break it to what’s-her-ass who wrote this middle school level horseshit,but even Larry The Nitwit Cable Guy lost 50 pounds on Nutri-System. I saw his commercial with Dan Marino in the wee hours a few nights ago.

This is the level of nitpicking insanity you find in my son’s middle school. You can’t wear GAP clothing because some little dipshit decided it means “Gay and Proud”. If you wear purple,it means you’re gay or lesbian. If you wear Adidas sneakers you’re “ghetto”,low class.
If your hair isn’t parted in the right place it’s a reason to pick. If you have the wrong color bag or backpack you appearently deserve to be shoved around. The shit is relentless and endless. And really fucking backwardass stupid,petty and a ginormous waste of time. It also (and this is what it’s designed to do imho)stands in the way of anything positive or progressive. It’s ridiculously difficult to raise a kid to be a decent human being in that environment,it pisses me off. Most parents of kids this age have no fucking clue what goes on either. It IS different than even 10 yrs ago. Especially if your kid is a target.

I think we’re gonna have to deal with this crap the way you deal with spoiled brats. You cannot play nice and ask them pretty please to stop it. This is where liberals get hung up. When compassion and kindness and restraint are seen as weaknesses to be exploited and taken advantage of,you gotta add more to the arsenal than taking the high road.

 
 

This is just grasping for straws. That’s all.

Which is what the WSJ does. Two words: Peggy Noonan.

 
 

“Too Fit to be President?” = “HE’S BLAAACCCKKK!!!”

 
 

Somebody bring me a cheeseburger, and a new Rolling Stone.

Okay, I’m done. Time to go to work.

 
 

We all know that America worships hefty people. All the current celebrities are hugely fat. Oprah’s constantly trying to gain weight and the supermodels are all suffering from obesity. Thin people just can’t catch a break.

Wow.

 
 

The fact is, here is more evidence that Obama is a vain presumptuous eleitist while McCain is a regular guy who eats at Dunkin Donuts, which I patronize since theyy removed the pro terrorist Rachel Ray ad.

Guess who wins in the Heartland?

 
 

Why the F*** did we not hear this about His Royal Highness George W. Clearing Brush Avid Bike Rider & Supposed Pretzel Choker Bush Jr?

Same with the “experience” argument. Being Senator – not good enough. Figurehead Governor – AOK!

Same with the “authenticity” argument. Acting naturally – not good enough. Pretending to be a cowboy while being rich scion of powerful family – AOK!

All variations on “It’s OK if you’re a Republican”

 
 

Too bad the Heartland doesn’t have the balls to secede. It’s would be nice to get rid of their welfare-loving asses.

 
 

Pathological obsession with exercise? Never seen that before.

Bush awoke a little before 6:00 a.m. on September 11, pulled on shorts and an old T-shirt and laced up his running shoes. [CBS, 11/1/02] At 6:30 a.m., Bush, a reporter friend, and his Secret Service crew took a four-mile jog in the half-light of dawn around a nearby golf course. [Washington Post, 1/27/02, Washington Post, 09/11/01]

At about the same time Bush was getting ready for his jog, a van carrying several Middle Eastern men pulled up to the Colony’s guard station. The men said they were a television news crew with a scheduled “poolside” interview with the president. They asked for a certain Secret Service agent by name. The message was relayed to a Secret Service agent inside the resort, who hadn’t heard of the agent mentioned or of plans for an interview. He told the men to contact the president’s public relations office in Washington, DC, and had the van turned away. [Longboat Observer, 9/26/01]

 
 

This day was starting out so nicely but now I’m afraid I’m going to have to kill WordPress.

 
 

Huh. I just assumed he had a working thyroid gland, unlike my fat ass, and went on with my life. I’ll vote for him anyway since it’s probably not his fault.

I’m fat, but I’m not bitter about skinny people as long as they’re not mocking me to my face, and even then it’s not so much skinny as “asshole” that I’m bitter about. But clearly I can expect these people to go back into the closet now that Fat Is In and we, with our majority, are marginalizing them. Right?

 
 

“Anyway, I agree with Yaoi here, this is just one more grasp at straws. Next they’ll be complaining about the pearly white teeth Obama has, and the brazen insult it is to our noble British-American families and their ugly fucking teeth.”

And this judgement is different from the one being criticised how, exactly?

 
Leon Trotsky, Exile-in-Mexico
 

It’s about teeth instead of fat? So one is based on calcium, and the other is based on adipose tissue?

 
 

Dear AMY CHOZICK,

Thank you for your recent article. It is an impressive work of non-substance and subliminal messaging. We regret to inform you, however, that Michael Scherer has been hired as our head fluffer. Should we have any further in this department, we will certainly keep your resume and portfolio on file for future consideration.

Sincerely,

McCain 2008

 
 

So, the WSJ, in its rush to become the Talk Soup of newspapers, basically says they’d prefer Jabba the Hut over Obama.
I agree with Jon Stewart. I don’t want a president who I can sit down and throw back pints and shoot the shit with while we ogle the waitresses. I want a President who is devastatingly, nay embarrassingly, more intelligent and capable then I am. When the hell did McPresident become the gold standard?

Shorther Amt Chozick: “That Barack Obama is so fit and healthy and has such nice teeth. Why isn’t he playing professional basketball, or football, and leave the important jobs to the (white) normal Americans?”

 
 

“I suppose Obama really should be taking out his stress not at the gym but by guzzling malt liquor and smoking blunts.”

Like all of “them”.

Oooo, the racism, double-standards and hatred just drips from this piece.

No matter what, you’ll never be good enough to rule us Obama!

And with all that said, as several others have pointed out, this is pathetic. Frankly, I do think the general voting population is tiring of this shit. They’re poor enough now that the stupid shit is secondary to the more important issues. Whether or not Obama can fix those issues to said voters’ approval or not isn’t the issue. As long as he seems like the serious candidate who is at least addressing them, I think the dems hold the lead. Let the rethugs and their house organs keep wailing this vapid shit. It only works against them now.

 
 

Who wouldn’t prefer Jabba? He’s a smart businessman who keeps his slaves in line – just what the Republicans promote in their platform.

 
Leon Trotsky, Exile-in-Mexico
 

Well, it certainly can’t be worse than their former military advisor, Grand Moff Tarkin. I mean, cripes, “fear will keep the neighboring star systems in line”? That may play at the RNC, but America should’ve known better. And now Alderan pays the price.

 
 

OMG! No wonder she wrote that article…just look at the poor thing:

Amy Chozick

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

Check out the art accompanying the article. Two of these things are not like the others.

The photo is even better. The caption is “Barack Obama jogs off the stage after speaking in Mitchell, S.D.” and looks like it was taken with some pervert’s upskirt shoe cam. Six foot one and a half inches? More like sixty feet one and a half inches.

 
 

188 minute workout — how else is he going to keep the arugula off his thighs?

 
 

Wait a minute, THAT’S the reason the past 8 years have been such a disaster. W exercised too much.

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

Some voters say that even this adds to Sen. Obama’s somewhat superhuman persona. “I mean, really, who quits smoking and doesn’t gain any weight?” says 30-year-old Stella Metsovas, an Obama supporter in Laguna Beach, Calif.

Stella Metsovas has a good point. I mean if I had a two pack a day habit and just quit cold-turkey, I’d be looking at getting new pants every other week until the end of the year. How bad was Obama’s smoking habit anyways?

Sen. Obama is not without vices. According to Dr. Scheiner’s medical report, he has quit smoking “on several occasions and is currently using Nicorette gum with success.” People close to the senator say he began smoking nearly three decades ago and smoked about five cigarettes a day.

Five a day! Two packs a week if his flavor country expeditions are higher on the weekends. Why hasn’t he ballooned to seventy gajillion squillion pounds?

 
 

Well, it’s the WSJ…it’s not the outlet considered particularly critical of, and investigative towards, obviously pro-Republican content. I mean, hey, it’s a RUPERT MURDOCH JOURNAL!

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

Well, it’s the WSJ…

As Brad pointed out – this isn’t an op-ed, something the WSJ has rightfully gotten a lot of criticism for. This piece is supposed to be a news item, something the WSJ usually gets praise (“despite the editorial section”) for. Also, page W1. Cover story of the week-end section, usually given to a piece that’s had at least a little bit of effort put into it.

 
 

This the noise machine ramping up. It is literally a pack of monkeys throwing shit at random. Occasionally a piece sticks.

 
 

Yes, but WSJ was bought out by Murdoch about a year ago. ‘Nuff said. It should really be no surprise to anyone here that the newspaper that businessmen once turned to for serious financial news and commentary has now turned into another New York Post.

 
 

Some voters say that even this adds to Sen. Obama’s somewhat superhuman persona. “I mean, really, who quits smoking and doesn’t gain any weight?”

Umm.. anyone checked for lizard eyes?

Also, The Onion predicted this months ago. My link got ated, but you can see it in Election ’08 section of the video page. Click on the picture of Hillary shoving a fork in her face.

 
 

“Only celebrities like Barack Obama go to the gym three times a day.”

Only celebrities like George W. Bush do nothing at their ranch three months out of the year.

As much as these morons love to whip this stuff out, their complete devotion to Bush makes them hypocrites every time.

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

I remember there being a lot of noise about that, and I also remember not worrying about it since the WSJ editorial page really couldn’t go any further right than it already was.

There is supposed to be a divide between the news staff and the editorial staff (and supposedly the publisher too). I haven’t been following the WSJ, so I don’t know if this Chozick piece is representative.

 
 

Please pick up the pieces of my brain that were strewn across the room as a result of reading the original article.

Afterward, please place them back in my head and ship my corpse to Australia or wherever he happens to be so that my zombified corpse can attack Rupert Murdoch.

 
 

Only celebrities like George W. Bush do nothing at their ranch three months out of the year.

That isn’t true. For ten or fifteen minutes he has to put on gloves and pose with brush.

 
 

Bad plan! Murdoch no haz brain to eat. Hungry!

 
 

I don’t know if reading this stuff if good for my health. Just reading Brad’s post, I want to go find a Wall Street Journal editor, strap them into a chair, and smack them in the face for about a year.

 
 

Everyone knows you can’ have a President be all obsessed with jogging and exercising and whatnot.

Bush awoke a little before 6:00 a.m. on September 11, pulled on shorts and an old T-shirt and laced up his running shoes. [CBS, 11/1/02] At 6:30 a.m., Bush, a reporter friend, and his Secret Service crew took a four-mile jog in the half-light of dawn around a nearby golf course.

 
 

The fact is, posts here are proof that liberals are intolerant, violent and racist and ignorant of reality. They are also biased.

 
 

Only celebrities like George W. Bush do nothing at their ranch three months out of the year.

Bush replied, “All right. You’ve covered your ass, now.”

 
 

The current occupant is 6? 0? and 190 lbs

the chimp 6 feet? No way, hosay. 5’10, TOPS…

 
 

Correction: This article did not appear in the mainstream news. It appeared in the print version of Faux News, aka the national edition of the New York Post.

Yeah, they used to be the best newspaper in the country if you ignored their editorial page. Now, not so much.

 
 

You had me worried until I saw it was in the WSJ. And in 1965 we never saw pro-capitalist articles in Pravda. You do know who owns the WSJ, right? And I do mean right!

 
 

I think we’re gonna have to deal with this crap the way you deal with spoiled brats. You cannot play nice and ask them pretty please to stop it. This is where liberals get hung up. When compassion and kindness and restraint are seen as weaknesses to be exploited and taken advantage of,you gotta add more to the arsenal than taking the high road.

Yeah, let’s just beat the shit outta ’em, get ’em usta the ‘real woprld,’ kick ’em in the nads if they won cooperate…Yeah!!!

 
 

Is Obama strong enough to

make blockquote work?

EOF

 
 

Can Obama make a href= work?

 
 

And here, I would think having a presidential candidate that takes care of himself would be an inspiration to the assorted fat-ass motherfuckers in the electorate to get off their duff and fucking exercise.

If the 2000 election taught us nothing else, it should have taught us that Americans don’t think this way. At all.

 
 

Why can’t I get Obama to let me use a href= ?

He keeps defeating my deeply insightful links with wax on wax off efficiency.

 
 

Ok, on a slightly related note, as in similar wingnut insanity, American nutters invaded Canadian news comment threads on the gruesome local murder story that is now global. (Some loonie decapitated a bus passenger in the middle of the prairies.) So the wingnuts a) get all critical of the bus passengers and police for not preventing the crime, calling them cowards and so on; b) make outlandish claims about what they would have done Rambo style; and c) start hammering away that the perp must be a Muslim terrorist. A handful of prolife wingnuts also weighed in, with graphic comparisons between what the loonie did to the victim and what abortionists do to fetuses “so why are you hypocrites upset?”.

I suggested that the wingnuts STFU and crawl back under their orange coloured rocks and they whined to the moderator that my comments were abusive so my comments were removed and theirs remain.

Armchair warriors are a sensitive bunch!

 
 

The picture with the article is un-fucking-believable. Shorter version of the article: Don’t vote for the n****r.

 
 

Shouldn’t the question be whether McCain is too short to be president?

 
Malfunctioning Chattering Wingnut Media
 

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[…] Via Sadly, No!, the Wall Street Journal is anxious to tell you of yet another way in which Barack Obama is Not A Normal Guy: […]

 
 

We all need to get over the concept that the media is going to push this shit from now until the election. It’s gonna happen, and it’s gonna get way stupider.

There should be no change in the protocol: MOCK THEM.

 
 

his slim physique just might have some Americans wondering whether he is truly like them.

which “some” would those be? The ones who will vote for George Bush forever and ever because he’s fat like they are and can’t run to catch a bus? Oh wait, he’s not fat either. I guess the fact that he’s dense and thick and can’t articulate simple thoughts makes up for the lack of flab.

Obama’s got to bring a flaw to the table. Fat, stupidity, a cod piece, something. Maybe he should start smoking and eating more corn dogs in public.

Good thing America isn’t a nation of crack addicts.

 
 

Sorry, Brad. I’d read your post, but “Ouch, My Balls!” is on the picture box.

Go ‘way! Batin’!

 
 

I like the “fair and balanced” headlines just below Amy Dipshit’s article

Related Articles from WSJ.com
• Obama’s Bad Turn Aug. 01, 2008
• Obama Says Republicans Will Try to Scare Voters Jul. 31, 2008
• McCain ‘Proud’ of Ad Comparing Obama to Britney Spears Jul. 31, 2008
• Obama Campaign Scolds McCain for ‘Celeb’ Ad Jul. 31, 2008

 
 

may as well blurt more outrage…my excuse. I haven’t gone to sleep yet.

Obama needs to spend more time at Fudge Hauses eating big German sausages like McCain!

 
ananagryoldbroad
 

Um no Woody,that’s NOT how you deal with spoiled brats. You don’t beat on them,seriously,is that the best you could come up with? That isn’t what I meant at ALL. Nice assumption there.

Any parent with a lick of sense knows that you don’t coddle or beat a spoiled brat. Jesus.

 
Functioning Carl's Jr. Robot
 

Welcome to Carl’s Jr. Would you like to try our EXTRA BIG ASS TACO? Now with more MOLECULES!

 
 

Write to Amy Chozick at amy.chozick@wsj.com

letting her know what a shallow dipshit you think she is and cc her editors.

 
 

The Great Garbage Avalanche of 2505 will reveal the Glenzilla article about the the dead Anthrax scientist

“Surely the question of who generated those false Iraq-anthrax reports is one of the most significant and explosive stories of the last decade.”

(I’d link to http://www.salon.com/opinion/greenwald/2008/08/01/anthrax/index.html but my WordPress fu has become compromised and I’m tired of typing notes into oblivion)

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

I was giving some thought to the “Celebrity” ad and have decided that either Britney Spears or Paris Hilton would make a better President than Old Man McCain. I don’t think I’m the only one either.

 
 

Too bad the Heartland doesn’t have the balls to secede. It’s would be nice to get rid of their welfare-loving asses.

They tried, remember? We didn’t let them. Sometimes I wonder if it was worth it.

 
 

OH NOES!!! Is America ready for a 6’1″ 180 pound President??? It’s like he’s a fucking Watutsi or something!!!!

 
 

OK. We have a press (particularly the WSJ) which has idolized an imbecilic, pig ignorant, puerile, rich frat boy for the last 8 years, in part because he was a bicycle riding fitness nut. Now we have an itelligent, well educated, community activist who is from a disadvantaged background and being fit is a bad thing? I think I will go stick my head in the oven now. Oh shit! It’s an electric oven. I will think of something….

 
 

Britney Spears or Paris Hilton would make a better President than Old Man McCain
They are certainly smarter and better informed.

 
 

Well, a poisonous tree frog would make a better president than McCain. And be more attractive to boot.

 
 

Oh shit! It’s an electric oven.

Try getting into the bath and throwing your iPod in.

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

Unfortunately, neither Britney nor Paris is over 35. Also, they’re both too thin (notwithstanding Britney’s MTV Award show appearance last year) to be President.

 
 

DrDick –

You can still bake yourself to death with an electric oven. It just takes some perseverance.

 
 

… American nutters invaded Canadian news comment threads on the gruesome local murder story that is now global. (Some loonie decapitated a bus passenger in the middle of the prairies.) So the wingnuts a) get all critical of the bus passengers and police for not preventing the crime, calling them cowards and so on; b) make outlandish claims about what they would have done Rambo style; and c) start hammering away that the perp must be a Muslim terrorist.

Pam Atlas is on this case. It looks like she posts on any bizarre murder reported anywhere in the world with the hope and expectation that the perp is a Muslim. She posts a couple of updates implying that the authorities are not revealing the perp’s ethnicity. Finally, a commenter writes that the killer is a Native American. Pammy, of course, neglects to add a further update to clarify.

http://atlasshrugs2000.typepad.com/atlas_shrugs/2008/07/man-beheaded-on.html#comments

 
 

To keep thumping an OT horse:

…the public had implanted into their minds that Saddam Hussein was not just evil, but a severe threat to the U.S., likely the primary culprit behind the anthrax attacks. All along, though, the anthrax came from a U.S. Government/Army research lab.

http://www.salon.com/opinion/greenwald/2008/08/01/anthrax/index.html

 
 

RE the bus beheading story, one of Pam’s readers had this to say:

Even if the offender wasn’t muslim, it can still be traced to them.
When anyone does something, whose blamed? Hollywood and video games. If they’re seriously blamed, I’m sure a certain group is responsible for embedding the idea of doing this into peoples heads. If there weren’t so many beheadings, and video’s all the time, I don’t think the thought or idea to do it by hand would be in most peoples minds! If a non-islamic person strapped bombs onto themselves, where did they get the inspiration from?

Like Abbas said, he taught the world terrorism.

 
 

It’s so funny that the right is always whining about how Obama’s just full of empty rhetoric but when I read their smear articles, I see this kind of bullshit. Exhibit A: The McCain ad comparing Obama to Britney Spears and Paris Hilton. Do they actually think that is going to work? And this is coming straight from McCain’s campaign! Didn’t anyone ever tell him that he needs to leave that kind of utter horseshit to the 527s, Michelle Malkin, Ann Coulter and Bill O’ Reilly? They are probably not satisfied with McCain because he’s stealing their thunder!

Let me state what 2/3rd of the country already knows: The GOP is like a huge meta-corporation who’s lost their star marketing man – Rove. (Though I’m sure he’s still injecting his slime into the narrative whenever possible.) From my conversations with them, the other 1/3rd of the country are made up of single issue idiots who are severely lacking in critical thinking skills.

The Republicans look more and more petty and ridiculous by the day. After all the lying, scheming and poisoning of the public debate over the past decade, they are probably never going to regain power again. Thank God.

 
 

on the bright side, i think the public isn’t drinking the Kool-Aid like they used to.

 
 

Quality journalism. Top-notch.

Amy Chozick in today’s Wall Street Journal:

“I won’t vote for any beanpole guy,” another Clinton supporter wrote last week on a Yahoo politics message board.

Amy Chozick, starting a thread at the Yahoo “Presidential Election 2008” discussion board, July 15, 2008:

Is Obama too skinny to be president?

Does anyone out there think Barack Obama is too thin to be president? Anyone having a hard time relating to him and his “no excess body fat”? Please let me know. Thanks!

Please read the responses, including the full quote from the person she quotes in her article. She went fishing and found one response that served her purposes.

 
 

Nice find, J—. Send it to her editors and maybe Glennzilla. Good thing Amy’s question wasn’t leading or anything. (Posting on Yahoo message boards? That journalism is some hard shit.)

 
 

Not just stupid, but also contextually flawed to the point where a retraction is in order, Digby points out.

 
 

Also, so far as we know, Obama hasn’t fallen off a bicycle.

 
 

“This is where liberals get hung up. When compassion and kindness and restraint are seen as weaknesses to be exploited and taken advantage of, you gotta add more to the arsenal than taking the high road.”

Context isn’t everything, it’s the only thing. In the right setting even a fist in the face is an act of compassion. Our conservative brothers are so immersed in their ignorance and illusions that it would be a true act of love to repeatedly strike them about the head and face. Metaphorically speaking, of course. Unless the context changes.

 
a concerned citizen
 

Anonymous, you raise a good point — right wing 527’s have to feel pretty left out right now. If the McCain campaign does this identity stuff now, 527’s can’t do it later without making it impossible for McCain to take the high road. McCain gave up all plausible deniability the last couple of weeks and got zero to show for it.

It speaks of a real lack of organization and planning on the Republican side, and a huge amount of desperation. I can’t imagine what’s going on in McCain headquarters right now but it things are definitely FUBAR. If they had any sense of strategery, they would’ve just let the Europe thing blow over a little bit and then get ruthlessly ugly with surrogates. Up until the conventions is a window of time when the Republicans can get really nasty before a lot of the narrative goes out of their hands and then they have to at least pretend to be serious for a while. And they’re totally blowing it — the timing is off, the attacks have been pathetic and have come from McCain instead of surrogates. We should all be quite pleased about that.

And we all owe a big debt of gratitude for Hillary for giving Obama experience against every reasonable line of attack against him. She’s the reason why today’s talking point, 3 months before the general election is something as silly as “is Obama too fit to be president?”

They can still definitely unleash some ugly stuff over the next few weeks but I don’t see them pulling out something brilliant on the fly when everything they’ve planned seems totally half-assed and isn’t working. Remember, the Swift Boat thing started in May, and Bush always kept distance from it. These things take time and distance. They’re running out of time and gave up all their distance.

If you want something to worry about, worry about the Florida-style voter roll purges in Colorado and other places. That is some scary stuff.

 
 

Is it a problem for Obama that he possesses two arms and two legs? Can voters truly relate to a man who arrogantly flaunts his full set of limbs?

BREAKING: Obama made a speech in which he pronounced all the words correctly. Is this the end of his bid for the Presidency? Can America truly stomach an elitist weirdo who knows how to talk? We interview a random anonymous nut from the Myspace forums to find out!

 
 

I can’t believe that article. I mean, I really can’t believe it. That someone got paid for writing it and no one got fired, I mean.

God, do we need Obama.

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

Amy Chozick, starting a thread at the Yahoo “Presidential Election 2008? discussion board, July 15, 2008

WTF?! She’s been working on that turd for more than two weeks? Geez, Amy Chozick, and I thought Shapiro was slow.

 
 

Brad–I haven’t read the entire thread, but I sure understand where you’re coming from. My wife is totally convinced that Obama will win in November–she says “people can’t be THAT stupid.” I recall 2000 and 2004 (and in-between and since) and sigh “yes, they ARE that stupid.”

What I read here and at sites like “YouAreDumb.net” reinforces that conclusion.

Sadly, yes.

…bc…

 
 

It’s like the bastards have learned nothing from the past eight years…

They learned that they get pay raises if they write shit like this and fired if they don’t. Their corporate masters lurves them some GOP, even now.

 
 

They’re gonna throw everything at him and see what sticks. It’s like the visiting the injured troops thing. He didn’t visit the troops so he has no time for the troops, but if he did visit them he would be using them as campaign props. When this stupid article doesn’t stick, we’ll see articles about how he’s an unhealthy smoker. It’s how the ratfuckers roll.

 
 

W got around the problem by concentrating all the fat in his head.

 
FAT-ASS MOTHERFUCKERS
 

We don’t want inspiration. We want food!

OM NOM NOM NOM NOM!!!

 
 

Thing that gets me about Obama is that he is a faux black man.

Raised by a white mother and white grandmother on the island of Hawaii, is he as culturally non-African-American as they come. So why did he drape himself in “blackness”? Why move to the south side of Chicago and involve himself with a racially oriented church? Why break up with the white girl because he was uncomfortable with her whiteness, and instead marry a dark skinned black woman?
How come we don’t see Obama’s mother? It appears that he is uncomfortable with his white heritage. Or perhaps he realized that as a “white” man in black clothing, he could best ascend to a position of visibility and prominence. Something about this guy comes across as playing the poseur.
But then again, perhaps that what all politicians do.

 
 

I’m afraid the scrawny Senator from Illinois is unelectable. Unlike me, he has a beard.

 
 

And William, he has those giant ears. They’re nice handholds for dipping into the bacon grease dressing, but they simply won’t do on a preznit.

 
 

“Something about this guy comes across as playing the poseur.”

That’s funny, Harry. I was thinking exactly the same thing about you.

 
 

Rove is overweight. So is Grover Norquist. As in FAT.

The WSJKR means fat republicans are over if Obama gets in. Even whoopi goldberg is trying to lose weight.

 
 

Here’s a fascinating comment posted at the WSJ on that story — sorry if the formatting doesn’t work:

Lawnguylander

*
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* Guest
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Post
Posted:
Fri Aug 01, 2008 2:22 pm
Post subject:
Re: Does physical appearance affect your impression of the president?

(1 rating)
nesarad wrote:
How sad when our reporters actually print such ignorant comments as “I won’t vote for any beanpole guy.” And we wonder how W. won another term, and why the rest of the world laughs at us.

What’s even sadder is how Amy Chozick dug up this quote in the first place. She didn’t just happen upon it in a a Yahoo forum. She went fishing for it by initiating her own thread:

Quote:
Is Obama too skinny to be president?
15-Jul-08 06:04 pm

Does anyone out there think Barack Obama is too thin to be president? Anyone having a hard time relating to him and his “no excess body fat”? Please let me know. Thanks!

And here’s the response she got from either a random nut or some wag and deemed newsworthy:

Quote:
Re: Is Obama too skinny to be president?
15-Jul-08 10:21 pm
Yes I think He is to skinny to be President.Hillary has a potbelly and chuckybutt I’d of Voted for Her.I won’t vote for any beanpole guy.

To which Amy responds:

Quote:
Re: Is Obama too skinny to be president? 16-Jul-08 09:12 am
Love your response and your username (onlinebeerbellygirl). Would you mind shooting me an email so I can ask you a few more quesitons? My email is (redacted by me) Thanks so much!

-Amy

Someone’s not fit to be a journalist.

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

Raised by a white mother and white grandmother on the island of Hawaii, Yup, Hawaii – the whitest state outside of the lower 48.

So why did he drape himself in “blackness”? Harry, just stop. The idea that twenty-something Barack Obama decided in Reagan’s America to move to Chicago to build up black street cred so he can make a run at the White House is positively Jack Wheeler-esque. I mean if that’s the kind of story you believe in, then watch out for all that fluoridated water – it’ll sap your precious bodily fluids.

 
 

Sorry, see someone beat me to that — but boy can I cut and paste!

 
 

That’s Lawnguylander. He comments regularly here.

So does Gary Ruppert. What are you doing over there, Gary? You’re supposed to be sharing the good news about John McCain at liberal blogs.

 
 

How come we don’t see Obama’s mother?

Some people consider it rude to wheel a corpse out during a campaign event.

/insert obligatory McCain joke

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

Sorry, see someone beat me to that — but boy can I cut and paste!

Well I went and added my own two cents to lawguylander’s at WSJ (and forgot to close a tag too! Yayy me!). I suggest everyone do the same. Maybe if these hit piece writers know that they’re being watched, they’ll at least try to come up with better hit pieces.

 
Ann Althouse Lives On Cheese & Crackers
 

Harry: You’re kidding, right?

 
 

You did noticed where Drudge, Newsweek, Time and others have gone lately over Obama’s body and his supposedly “compulsive exercising,” no?

 
 

How could he possibly be healthy. HE SMOKES!

He smokes. He’s a muslim. He has gay sex with drug addicts. He does drugs. I still think that all of this is just a practical joke to show how stupid liberals really are. They would vote for anybody if they told them what they wanted to hear.

 
 

[…] Um, wow. You know that Amy Chozick piece in the Wall Street Journal that asks whether Barack Obama might not be fat enough to be President? […]

 
 

Sorry if I should have credited you with that discovery, J-. I did at Digby though and hopefully some of them will go to the WSJ article and comment on the origin of the quote and how terribly funny it is that the source is “onlinebeerbellygirl.” The more noise the better. And there will be consequences if news of Chozick’s lax standards reaches the new managing editor (appointed after the News Corp. takeover). He’ll send out a memo banning reporters from this type of quote fishing under their real names so fast it’ll make your fucking head spin.

 
 

It’s time to go after McCain:
He’s senile
He is a cancer time bomb
He collaborated with the enemy and received special treatment for it in Vietnam.

 
 

his slim physique just might have some Americans wondering whether he is truly like them.

“OmiGod! Just who is this Barack Obama fellow? He’s not like us Americans, he’s not F-A-A-A-T!!!”

Anybody remember what GW Bush’s body fat content is?

 
 

I can’t believe it! Barack Obama appears to have a physical stature that is similar to Abraham Lincoln! And we all know what a putz he was. Worst. Prezinent. Evah!

I’m glad this was pointed out to me. We certainly don’t want to relieve the incompetent presidential nightmare that was known as “Honest Abe.”

 
 

Anybody remember what GW Bush’s body fat content is?

Oh, it’s gargantuan, but solely concentrated ‘twixt his ears.

 
 

Simple explanation Barack is a smoker who is hopefully successfully kicking that habit. The worse time for a smoke is stressful situations.Considering the stress of the campaign trail his choices are replace eating for smoking,which is not good because you gain weight and your clothes no long fit, or replace the nicotine rush with a adrenaline rush.This is the choice Barack has made.
The campaign should purchase Barack a “Total Gym” that they can cart around so he can work out in his hotel suite ala Chuck Norris and Cristy Brinkley .

 
 

Do over without links so as to sidestep the spam blocker: No apologies, please, Lawnguylander. I just assumed you had done the same Google search I did this morning. I see via World O’ Crap that Steve M. at No More Mister Nice Blog found the same Yahoo discussion independently as well.

And as you say, the important thing is to get journalists to do their job.

 
 

Does anyone out there think Barack Obama is too thin to be president? Anyone having a hard time relating to him and his “no excess body fat”? Please let me know. Thanks!

We have now officially attained Idiocracy.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0387808

 
 

Also, what Teh Buddha said. Namaste bro!

 
 

John H. Farr: You’ve not been keeping up with media much in the last, oh, 15 years or so, have you?

 
 

Thing that gets me about Obama is that he is a faux black man.

Harry: You don’t, what’s it called, “get it,” do you?

What, he’s not “black enough” for you? And your point is, Obama is somehow exploiting his “blackness,” ironically, in a way that’s not authentically “black”? Or WHAT?

Man. I feel a rant coming on.

 
 

Simple explanation Barack is a smoker who is hopefully successfully kicking that habit.</I.

As long as you’re chowing down on the environmentally-unsustainable, ethically-abhorrent, unregulated and in every other way totally unsupportable consumption of meat, you can bite my ass about holier-than-thou smoking Nazism.

 
 

Dammit, tag forgetty.

 
 

[…] Sadly, No! and No More Mister Nice Blog) Share and […]

 
 

[…] you read the skinny on that absurd Wall Street Journal hit piece on Obama’s weight yet? If you haven’t, click on that link before going to Sadly, No! to learn how great […]

 
 

obama is awesome. u guys should check out me and my friend’s blog. we talk about the environment, apple, technology, basketball, and ludacris

http://hamexpress.net/2008/07/28/review-of-ludacriss-the-preview/

 
 

[…] she quotes Chozick’s piece. And uses both quotes. Nearly in […]

 
 

[…] pretty much all they got. Obama’s arrogant, he’s popular… plus, he exercises and he’s thin. Speaking of thin… (Not that this crap still can’t […]

 
 

[…] he’s too healthy and works out too much. No, really. No, really. NO, […]

 
 

Please tell me this is from the Onion.

 
 

Yeah, they used to be the best newspaper in the country if you ignored their editorial page. Now, not so much.

 
 

(comments are closed)