News Bulletin: We Have Never Been at War with Northasia, We Have Always Been at War with Westasia
The shock wears off and the flower fades. So long to bad rubbish, I say.
Pamela Geller, American Marmosat Consumption:
Obama’s Hypocrisy on Gays
So, apparently, I owe Jeff from last post a bit of an apology.
See, what I didn’t know at the time of Jeff’s bizarre attempt at playing “gotcha” with a satire news site was that his post was part of the new marching orders that have apparently trickled down the various ranks of Team Fucknuts to respond to Obama’s recent calling out of Vladimir Putin on his supervillain style attempts to criminalize any means for homosexuals to protest their government by basically changing their long standing rants about how Obama is evil for being too close to Putin to how Obama is evil for daring to argue against glorious conservative Putin and why doesn’t he bomb Middle Eastern countries for being homophobic.
Which I guess is the new attempted liberal-baiting justification for war now that “standing up for the rights of women in the Middle East” is universally accepted as the cruel joke it has always been.
So given the focus it’s no surprise that our old muslim-fearing friend Pamela Geller would be itching to-
Wait. Pamela Geller is reduced to shitting out articles for the American Thinker next to the random birthers and the people terrified of literal communists hiding under their beds?
Wow, guess being the chief inspiration to Norway’s worst single-gunman mass murderer and publicly supporting a UK neo-nazi organization because they promised to hate “pakis” more than her brood has really faded the poor girl’s star.
Can’t say it’s happening to a more deserving waste of human flesh.
Shorter (or the last port before Jungle):
- WAH! Obama’s not allowed to criticize the foreign dickweasel we’ve suddenly decided is ours because he hates the fags unless he criticizes these other foreign dickweasels we claim to hate because they hate the fags… I don’t know why the stupid liberals aren’t buying it. Don’t they care about gay rights?
Right, right. Her actual post.
Having been made a complete fool of by Russia’s Putin,
Jeebus fucking Christ, you’d think the whiplash of wingnuts flipping their positions and allegiances every five seconds would hurt after awhile.
Apparently, Putin, fresh from being the USSR born again due to his sheltering of an American whistleblower from the rough hands of authoritarian “justice” is now Capitalist Jesus again thanks to a new bill basically banning any queer activism, public education, Pride, or possibly even being out in a space where children are present.
Now some might think an entire hate movement changing their allegiance to support this fucker based on him being willing to completely abuse the queer community of his country might just ruin their credibility when they decide to concern troll their hate targets on queer issues.
But apparently, the various wingnuts who’ve been given these identical marching orders aren’t terribly concerned.
Obama is in schoolyard whining mode, making fun of Putin and calling him names while criticizing Russia’s stand on gays.
WAH! Putin, give us our leaker back. We want to punnnnish him. MOMMY!
Okay, maybe that bit is slightly accurate to reality, but seeing as how the wingnuts have been leading the anti-Snowden brigade for the last month now, I’m not terribly convinced it was that aspect that incensed him.
No, instead it seems it was the throwaway comments he made echoing the general international outcry over Russia’s claim to enforce their bizarre new anti-gay law against Olympic athletes at the 2014 Olympics in Sochi, the one which is particularly brutal to “foreign instigators”. And which might just impact athletes a little.
Because who cares about brutal American reactions to those who whistle blow about American war crimes when we can be smearing Obama on almost kinda supporting queers in the same bland way as the rest of the international community.
That’s logic.
This is beneath the office of the president
Let’s see, the last president lied to the entire globe in order to start two endless wars of choice that also resulted in torture becoming de facto American policy.
But it’s a president almost kinda criticizing a foreign kinda-dictator that is suddenly beneath the office of the president.
Do tell.
and once again demonstrates how out of his depth our buffoon-in-chief is.
Man, it’s kinda painfully obvious how much they want to “get revenge” for all the fairly accurate criticisms liberals laid on Bush, isn’t it?
I mean, you can say a lot of things about Obama, but buffoon certainly isn’t one of them. Nerd, cool guy, Vulcan, black man who is black, etc… but buffoon?
But hey, we used to note that Bush was slightly less dignified than a Rhesus monkey having an epilepsy, so the charge must be made, reality be damned!
In criticizing Putin, Obama groused that Putin has “got that kind of slouch, looking like the bored kid in the back of the classroom.”
And…?
I know the news media really wants us to be concerned about this “gaffe” and harrumph and not at all continue to focus on how the job market is still in complete disarray, there’s absolutely no safety net and conservatives keep chipping at what we do have, direct assaults are being made every day against the remaining illusions we might have had of living in a democracy, and minorities are being placed center in a vicious backlash by wanna-be fascists.
I mean, OH NOES, Obama snarked at another foreign leader and noted how his self-image as wild man often clashes with his reality of being a small-minded bigot with a short temper and an inability to handle not being in control of everything…
And suddenly I understand why the right-wing has realized they love him so much.
Can you imagine if a Republican president (say, George W. Bush)
A) Can you say Freudian slip?
B) Wait for it…
behaved in so sophomoric and pathetic a fashion?
Oh my yes. Can you imagine the outcry if George W. Bush had ever diminished a foreign president as illustrious as Putin like a raucous child? Or if he acted like an insane religious fanatic to foreign leaders? Or if he say harassed a foreign leader on camera by touching her without consent because hey, she’s just a silly woman anyways?
Gosh, that would be terrible. But certainly less terrible for mildly disparaging the self-image of a pompous dictator, which is wrong for reasons I am sure have absolutely nothing to do with unblinking worship of authoritarianism for authoritarianism’s sake.
The media’s response would have been indescribable.
Not really. It’s really pretty easy to describe. It kinda sorta already happened. Hence why you are trying to “revenge smear” Obama here with some blather about him being unprofessional for calling out a candidate poisoning sonuvabitch with some mild snark.
If that wasn’t awful enough,
Hey, no need to convert me. I’m totally on your side. Use of snark = Satan. I’m solid on that.
Obama audaciously declared of Russia:
Gotta love when the needless flourishes wingnuts add to their posts in order to seem smart reveal massive dog whistles.
Yes, do go on about how “audacious” Obama is. Strange how you make it sound like it has two p’s and ends with an -ity.
I have no patience for countries that try to treat gays or lesbians or transgender persons in ways that intimidate them or are harmful to them.”
Addendum to my earlier agreement. Clearly Obama is not just Satan, but also Hitler. Space Hitler. MECHA-SPACE-LAZER HITLER!
I mean, thinking that queers are people?!?
I just… no words.
Just all of my shame. And to think I used to be so proud to consider myself an American (/crying eagle tear drop).
Really? Russia is not mutilating and executing gays the way Muslim regimes do under the Sharia.
Yup, no blood on those shores.
Also, huh? Death penalty for being queer?
I wonder why American wingnuts aren’t using the far more public example of Uganda here? Oh well, no use dwelling on it.
And Obama supports most vicious anti-gay regimes in the world.
Yup, that he does!
I mean, I haven’t checked, but I assume such a SUPER-MEGA-ULTRA-HITLER must have surely said some vile things in support of homophobes around the globe.
Like with Uganda…
Er…
The gay community should be disgusted by such political exploitation.
And thus should more easily fall for our even more naked and obvious political exploitation. Just like women did for Sarah Palin or blacks did for Alan Keyes.
AND WHAT DO YOU MEAN, IT DIDN’T WORK?!?
The Muslim Brotherhood’s genocidal position on homosexuality is quite clear. Where is Obama’s condemnation?
So uh three things.
First, Obama is not God. It is not his job to sort out the world into things that are bad and things that are good and show his direct verbal approval to each of the correct things to let us know how to feel about things.
I mean, yes, he’s a man with a great deal of power and a supportive word from such a man can do a great deal of good for marginalized group members in feeling they have official support and their government takes their concerns seriously.
And he has the power to affect some good when criticizing foreign laws and attitudes.
But it’s not like the world will fall out if he doesn’t personally finger-wag at every homophobe on the planet. Because if he did, he’d be there for a fucking long time.
It’s not on him to be proactive on every bit of homophobia, but rather on us the queer activists to keep awareness on these growing issues.
Second, that being said, I’m sure Obama will criticize such a law when such a law actually happens. Currently the state of queer laws in Egypt (and yes, it’s pretty clear that the 180 on how “DEMOCRACY” Egypt’s revolution was is directly related in how long the wingnuts could pretend that that would mean they would accept an American-friendly dictator) is pretty shitty with an expectation of a hammer coming. But that hammer hasn’t come yet.
Whereas in countries like Uganda or Russia, there has been a hammer. A direct top-level law banning the ability of queer activists in country to even have the platform to change the laws that affect them. Or the ability of said queer activists to even live.
Things ain’t that bad in Cairo yet. And as such Obama hasn’t called them out.
And frankly, as a queer activist, I wouldn’t want him to yet. Not just because it would be feeding right-wing crap but because America is a poisoned name in the region right now. The last thing fledgling queer movements there need is some American shitbird making them seem like a puppet of a hated American president.
Instead for those of us on the outside who give a fuck, we need to instead ask the local queer community in Egypt what they need us to do in order to help them achieve greater social and political freedom.
Third, uh huh, yeah, this has nothing to do with: Ignore that actual anti-gay law, those muslims were looking muslimy in my general direction with their muslim name and high thread count (you know you get it). Sure. Pull the other one, it’s got bells on.
Mashregh News, a government-controlled paper in Iran, recently claimed that Israel “spreads homosexuality” around the world in its quest for world domination.
Yes, the Iranian government is a pack of fucking nuts reality-deniers. It’s sort of their thing. The majority of the Iranian people know it, they’re just locked in a brutal dictatorship.
And no, before you start, a war would be the last thing that revolution needs to break free. I know you all miss the days when Iran’s insane dictator gave prostate massages to America and the UK, but that’s not going to help a single queer individual… as if you gave a single fuck about that.
So what other examples do we have?
GayStarNews reported last June that the Indonesian city of Tasikmalaya in West Java is seeking to criminalize homosexuality, in accordance with Islamic law, sharia.
Oh my, one single city, thinking about criminalizing homosexuality. Clearly this is a much greater news story than a former superpower and a major international power actually criminalizing public support for homosexuality.
I mean, not to knock what is a fucking shitty situation for those in that town, but fuck, we’ve got various cities here in the states that are “seeking to criminalize homosexuality”.
Not to minimize that, but if you want us to be all nice and distracted from your big queer-hating Russian bear, it’s kind of expected that you’d actually have… well, something.
So what’s your big example that we need to ignore Russia and instead focus on muslimy muslims?
Last January, three Muslims in London were arrested on hate crime charges for handing out leaflets calling for the execution of gays;
No, not three bigots in England!
Why did I ever- wait, weren’t you the woman who supported a neo-nazi hate group in the general UK area and-
Where homosexual activity is legal in Muslim countries, some Muslims take the sharia into their own hands. Early in September, the Turkish Hürriyet Daily News reported: “A gay teenager was allegedly killed last month by his father and uncle in the southeastern province of Diyarbak?r in a murder that the boy’s rich and powerful tribal family subsequently sought to cover up, according to local members of the LGBT community.”
MURDER! Finally, we have something. Or at least, we have the same global sad story. Again, not to minimize, but religious bigots practically make a living killing our young in the queer community. Either by driving them to suicide, murdering them out of “religious obligation”, or claiming gay or trans* panic. The story is brutally, painfully, the same.
It’s what happens when conservatism runs rampant and patriarchal cultures treat their women and children as property and those who invite questions to that reality as sinful and wrong. It’s why last post’s Onion article is so darkly true.
But the sickest thing, beyond the fact that Pamela Geller for all her obsessive “bad muslim activity” collecting ways can’t even manage to come up with something half as bad as that happening in Russia, is that it’s so clear that she and her kind simply DO NOT CARE.
They couldn’t give a single fuck if an Iranian lesbian teen lives in fear of discovery by her “proper behavior” enforcing dictators. They do not give a fuck about those trying to seek asylum from the most homophobic places in the world and denied it by homophobic immigration officials. They do not care that refugees from these lands are denied any means to marry their partners in the States and gain citizenship. They do not care.
All they care about is distracting people from actual homophobic laws, smearing Obama, and trying to get that War on Iran they are sure will make their boners stand tall once and for all.
Cause most of all, they do not care that we can tell they are disingenuous assholes.
Because that’s how the concern troll strategy works.
Treating your troll targets like a bunch of fucking idiots who can’t possibly notice when a disingenuous asshole is trying to shame them for noticing real problems instead of obvious distractions.
Sorry to disappoint, but… Sadly, No!
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. I mean, I don’t think they even use the clutch when they switch allegiances like that, it can’t be good for their rationalization’s timing belt. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™
Fristicles!
FRIST!!
MWAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAA!
P.S. HA!
Heh heh heh…
DAMN YOU UPSIDE-DOWN WENCH!!
I SHALL HAVE MY REVENGE!!!
MWAHAHAHAHAHAH etc.
Yeah. Pretty much any time I see “muslim” repeated anywhere I have to double check that it doesn’t say the other word. Probably has to do with a background image of sheets.
And as for their rediscovered love for pooty-poot, I always figurd Junior loved him so much because pooty-poot had achieved Junior’s dream (and I know Junior would have been as pathetically obvious, too).
I have no patience for countries that try to treat gays or lesbians or transgender persons in ways that intimidate them or are harmful to them
Does this mean he’s lost his patience with the GOP congresscreeps?
The Muslim Brotherhood’s genocidal position on homosexuality is quite clear. Where is Obama’s condemnation?
The Muslim Brotherhood who just got thrown out of power and is the target of a violent crackdown, which we so far have refused to stop funding? What does she want, Obama to fly over and personally step on Morsi’s toe?
I’m just glad to know that conservatives are suddenly all about gay rights and women’s rights.
I mean, the last 30+ years of GOP policy had me kind of wondering.
What does she want, Obama to fly over and personally step on Morsi’s toe?
Nothing less than an atomic wedgie will demonstrate seriousness.
I’m just glad to know that conservatives are suddenly all about gay rights and women’s rights.
Standard fare for them, once they’ve finally completely lost a culture war, to claim that they were really on the other side all along. See also civil rights.
To be fair, right now they’re not there yet – they’re just saying “the hajjis are worse, and bitches and faggots should be more appreciative of the fact that at least we let them be alive.” (… did conservatives ever try this tack back in the fifties and sixties over civil rights when comparing themselves to the Nazis? I wonder). Nevertheless, at some point by the end of the century, they will get to that point* and that’s when we’ll know for sure that this particular culture war is over, and we’ve won.**
* Assuming their economically-minded partners don’t crash the nation completely first, in which case all bets are off.
** Fear not: there’ll be another culture war to take its place, other people to hate and marginalize.
FIST
And Obama supports most vicious anti-gay regimes in the world.
I’m assuming she meant to say “the most.”
And thus should more easily fall for our even more naked and obvious political exploitation
LOL. You have to love her expectations:
“In American politics, gay people should not vote for the people fighting for their rights over here. Rather, they should vote for the people fighting for gay rights over there, insofar as “over there” means “in Muslim dominated countries” since this offer does not apply in Uganda, Russia, or really any country other than the ones we already want to bomb. Furthermore, gay people in America should just trust that conservatives are, in fact, fighting for gay rights “over there,” despite the fact that the occupation of Iraq offers nothing to support that theory and much to contradict it.”
And coming up after our commercial break, a panel of straight and closeted white male Christian fundamentalists discusses the bewildering reasons why this form of marketing to the gay community hasn’t yet convinced them to vote Republican.
I actually agree we should bomb countries with homophobes. Let’s start with the United States.
Wow. That’s just…holy shit.
I’m going to start the bidding with looking under that table at an event and joking that he couldn’t find WMDs under it…while over 4000 service members died in Iraq. Not pathetic or sophomoric at all.
Releasing the name of a covert CIA agent whose husband exposed their lies about Iraq’s desire to develop nukes isn’t beneath the office at all.
–interview with CBS News’ Katie Couric, Sept. 6, 2006
–as quoted in Bob Woodward’s Bush at War
–at the 2000 Al Smith dinner
–in parting words to world leaders at his final G-8 Summit, punching the air and grinning widely as those present looked on in shock, Rusutsu, Japan, July 10, 2008
–Washington, D.C., Dec. 19, 2000
–to a divorced mother of three, Omaha, Nebraska, Feb. 4, 2005
** Fear not: there’ll be another culture war to take its place, other people to hate and marginalize.
My bet, furries.
I actually agree we should bomb countries with homophobes. Let’s start with the United States.
Let’s drop the gay bomb!
Now that we have regular postings, can we get the formatting of the page fixed so the articles are the focus of the page, so when I increase the font size, the side bar correctly goes off the side of the page? Please?
Thanks for the reminders.
It’s easy to remember Bush as an amiable dunce who never really had a clue what he was doing and had Cheney, Rumsfeld and the rest pulling his strings. It’s not even really wrong. But quotes like the above should be read every time the Bush subject comes up just as a reminder that yes, he really was a complete scumbag who was perfectly okay with destroying and ruining as many lives as he did.
“Is our children learning?”
I believe that Bush may have had some residual brain damage from all his years of drinking like a fish. It doesn’t rule out that he was an asshole before he started drinking, and that he’s still an asshole after he stopped drinking.
Marmosat: a United Kingdom geosynchronous satellite launched in 1993 by Ariane launch services. The ESA built satellite narrowcasts in the psyche spectrum, occasionally spurring old female teachers into acts of fetal violence.
Feral. Feral violence. Even though “fetal violence” is an interesting turn of phrase, FYNexus/autocorrect/fat fingers/ &c.
“Neither in French nor in English nor in Mexican.”—declining to answer reporters’ questions at the Summit of the Americas, Quebec City, Canada, April 21, 2001
“See, in my line of work you got to keep repeating things over and over and over again for the truth to sink in, to kind of catapult the propaganda.”—Greece, N.Y., May 24, 2005
“One of the great things about books is sometimes there are some fantastic pictures.”—U.S. News & World Report, Jan. 3, 2000
. “You know, when I campaigned here in 2000, I said, I want to be a war president. No president wants to be a war president, but I am one.”—Des Moines, Iowa, Oct. 26, 2006
“Now watch this drive!”
(Still my favorite Bushism).
Sorry, people. I call all your bids and push the rest of my chips forward on “dork impersonating Buck Rodgers landing on an aircraft carrier and proclaiming Mission Accomplished” as the all-time lowering of the prestige of the presidency. Obama would have had to appear on Dancing With The Stars wearing a zoot suit to have matched that one.
“There’s an old saying in Tennessee — I know it’s in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can’t get fooled again.” —Nashville, Tenn., Sept. 17, 2002
“You work three jobs? … Uniquely American, isn’t it? I mean, that is fantastic that you’re doing that.” —to a divorced mother of three, Omaha, Nebraska, Feb. 4, 2005
And yet again, we can see why conservatives spell classy with a k.
“It’s just a goddamned piece of paper!”
George Walker Bush, explaining the US Constitution.
However, Bush opened with:
“Major combat operations in Iraq have ended. In the Battle of Iraq, the United States and our allies have prevailed.”
Ah, that Mission Accomplished banner was only a clever ruse to give the “terrierists” a false sense of security.
He stood under a giant banner that proclaimed “Mission Accomplished”… That’s even WORSE than saying it.
Not to mention lying his ass off about his team of ethical cretins mounting that ugly-ass banner for him in the wake of the “MISSION FUBAR” Commandante Codpiece clown-show.
Except they never really give up, so they never completely lose. Where, rationally, it would seem that a war has been lost, they keep plugging away anyway. See civil rights. They’ve been denying proper representation (gerrymandering) and the vote (voter ID, insufficient polling places, scare letters, etc.) to primarily black US citizens for years, and they’re ramping it up, after John Robert’s “Day of Jubilee.” I would think that denying a voter the right to vote would be a worse crime than voting illegally. It’s certainly hapoened far more often, and more systematically. I still don’t understand why JEB wasn’t charged for removing hundreds of legitimate voters from the rolls in 2000. It should take more than one guy sending over a list of names to be removed (and not even exact matches, though names are not unique) for voters to be purged.
I saw this coming when Repuke’s went over there to give him handjobs for throwing Pussy Riot in jail. The real fun begins when elected whackaloons pick up on this shriekery and start blathering about Obama’s lack of civility towards bullet headed ex-spook and professional knee-capper Putin.
It’s gorgeous, in a sick twisted sort of way because the two semi-sane people left in the RNC would really, really, really like to at least pretend for five seconds that it isn’t the party of gay bashing, but the gibbering fucknuggets can’t leave that shit alone.
p.s. This really is me. Based on post zapping in the last thread it appears there was some confusion. Or perhaps I got banned for being funnier than the moderators. Har!
my fave: “Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB-GYNs aren’t able to practice their love with women all across this country.”
: “Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB-GYNs aren’t able to practice their love with women all across this country.”
That would explain why they can’t put food on their family.
“All right, you’ve covered your ass now.”
My total lack of surprise – let me show you it.
That would explain why they can’t put food on their family.
that’s my second favorite…
Like Name That Tune, I can reproduce my favorite GWB quote with just one word: “nucular”.
Like Name That Tune, I can reproduce my favorite GWB quote with just one word: “nucular”.
that’s pretty good strategery…
Here’s even more evidence of all Muslims’ unquenchable thirst for infidel blood:
http://www.thehindu.com/news/national/when-muslims-escorted-a-hindu-baraat/article5016421.ece
The gynecologist line makes me wonder what line Laura’s been feeding him.
Name-o-the-day, unlikely but real:
Randy Twaddle
http://www.usnews.com/news/blogs/press-past/2013/05/01/the-other-symbol-of-george-w-bushs-legacy
2012 called, it wants the insult back.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mission_Accomplished_speech
An argument of badgers.
I find my nit-pickery and suspicion suddenly vanishes when George W. Bush’s staff does some truly spectacular knob-polishing on behalf of their boss.
Today was brought to you by the letter L, the number 27, and the logical fallacy of Special Pleading.
http://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Special_pleading
Ask an Iraqi how fake their outrage is.
Dubya’s clusterfuck keeps killing them by proxy in downtown Baghdad to this day.
All the DU ammo blazed into Iraq will make sure more die for generations to come, too.
Oopsydaisies!
Dennis, I actually wrote a lot of that wikipedia page. You might notice it is the White House that hung the banner right behind where they KNEW Bush was going to be speaking.
Beach Kittens!
Many of us can indulge in buffoonery without becoming shills, pointmen or agents provacateurs for MIC disasters. Bush’s crimes really are remarkable.
Many people fear clowns. I join those people when the clown has an army at hand.
The White House claimed that the banner was requested by the crew of the ship, who did not have the facilities for producing such a banner. Afterward, the administration asked the press crew whether any of them were interested in buying a bridge.
Nothing fake about my outrage. I was outraged at the time, not just at Junior’s transparent (and, sadly, successful ) attempts to gather more power (he wanted to be a wartime prez, remember), but at the complete and utter failure of the “news” media to do their job. Not only did they roll over to show their bellies to Power, they aided and abetted everything the Cheney/Bush administration did.
As for the constant stream of IT’S ALWAYS PROJECTION that’s been going on since Clinton, at least (I tend to date it to Saint Ronnie, when the “news” media pretty obviously stopped doing their job), don’t get me started.
The White House claimed that the banner was requested by the crew of the ship, who did not have the facilities for producing such a banner. Afterward, the administration asked the press crew whether any of them were interested in buying a bridge.
are you implying that never in the history of the navy they *never* needed a large banner printed? because that is totes plausible…that the greatest military on the face of the earth has no large scale printing options open to them is just too unfathomable…
It’s the Kinkos’ at the PX. I thought everyone knew that.
Just because everyone says Bush was an idiot doesn’t mean he wasn’t an idiot.
I’ll ask Cindy Sheehan how fake her outrage is at the loss of her son and then being ridiculed and laughed at by the Bush minions.
Oh and viciously excoriated by right wing media everywhere.
I just thought it was rather hilarious that PamBam decides that Obama is sophomoric and pathetic compared to George W Bush.
That’s sort of like saying a decent wine is gross compared to Keystone Ice beer.
Obama is a bit pathetic, but no more pathetic than your average politician. Bush was just a completely ignorant dope who let Nixon’s old crew steer him into a ditch on a regular basis.
Maybe you can get Michele Malkin to peek in her windows to see what kind of counter tops she has.
Standard fare for them, once they’ve finally completely lost a culture war, to claim that they were really on the other side all along. See also civil rights.
I imagine Reince Priebus will be furiously beating off under the desk while he’s talking about the “gay plantation”.
Let’s drop the gay bomb!
“Somebody set up us the gay bomb!”
“Hello, gentlemen!! All your gays are belong to us!”
“What you say!!
“You are on the way to fabulousness, make your time.”
http://www.ronsonwriter.com/content/view/69/9
Pup, is that from England’s “Onion”?
I was wondering the same thing.
To me, the “tell” is the specificity of his meal. Once or twice a month, I terrorize one of the local Indian restaurants by descending like a one-man plague of locusts and I never count how many samosas I devour.
Learn something every day. Until today, the only dutch oven I knew about was, you know, the actual cooking implement. What a shitty* thing to pull on someone. That’s just nasty, and I’m someone who’s discussed intestinal parasites at the dinner table.**
As for his meal, I’m somewhat boggled. All that food (does sound good, just not in that quantity), and a gallon of beer?
*Sometimes literally, it seems. Bet they didn’t clean it up, either.
**I was in college, as were my tablemates. 3/4 of us getting bio-based degrees. The fourth was EE, and she did turn a rather delicate shade of green.
Huh. OK, I got pwned. Should have figured that meal was … a bit much.
I stand by my “dutch oven” remarks, though. Sheesh! Any guy tried that on me, he’d be bounced so fast he woukdn’t know what hit him.
Just because everyone says Bush was an idiot doesn’t mean he wasn’t an idiot.
Groucho Marx said something like that once.
That Dutch oven story doesn’t pass the smell test.
it’s wafer thin!
Obama should have referred to Putin as Pooty Poot in order to maintain the dignity level achieved by GWB.
Learn something every day. Until today, the only dutch oven I knew about was, you know, the actual cooking implement.
I’ve also heard it referred to as a “covered wagon”.
Learn something every day. Until today, the only dutch oven I knew about was, you know, the actual cooking implement.
I call it a couple of different things:
Best have a comfortable couch.
Signing your own death warrant.
Cruel and unusual punishment.
Just fucking gross and totally uncalled for and also something made famous by fat, hairy rednecks who can’t read 2 gud.
Not that I ever wanted to do such a thing, but I suspect if I did I wouldn’t live long enough to tell anyone about it.
It’s pretty impressive that the dutch oven chef even wants to remain alive. To be forever known as the person who farted someone to death must be weird. Mind you there might be job openings.
There’s a minor cottage industry that makes up names for things nobody does, or that haven’t been done enough to merit coining a term. Is it truly a “thing” if it’s all-or-mostly talk? (I’m looking at you, Hot Carl.) Of course, once it’s a thing, someone will try it.
Those People are said to do wacky disgusting things that juvenile boys must have terms to discuss, terms that at first elicit a “what’s that?” and never refer to matters at hand — the Urban Dictionary sentence is seldom spoken. This is how I learned about “felching” and the gerbil nonsense (I dunno the term, which surely exists). The former gets done, but why were we talking about it? –Homophobia. The latter does not, if Dan Savage is to be believed, but it’s a perenially hot topic for the same reason.
I pity the performers and prostitutes who get stupid requests fielded for no better reason than that asshole morons heard of this or that “thing,” the blumpkin or what have you.
Mmm, felchers.
Hey, let’s not forget:
“I’m the decider.”
When you are alone
A rusty trombone
Is a dream for some future day
Those lackin’ for lovin’
Will get no dutch oven
And wipe lonely tears away
More verses available here!
Except they never really give up, so they never completely lose. Where, rationally, it would seem that a war has been lost, they keep plugging away anyway. See civil rights. They’ve been denying proper representation (gerrymandering) and the vote (voter ID, insufficient polling places, scare letters, etc.) to primarily black US citizens for years, and they’re ramping it up, after John Robert’s “Day of Jubilee.” I would think that denying a voter the right to vote would be a worse crime than voting illegally. It’s certainly hapoened far more often, and more systematically. I still don’t understand why JEB wasn’t charged for removing hundreds of legitimate voters from the rolls in 2000. It should take more than one guy sending over a list of names to be removed (and not even exact matches, though names are not unique) for voters to be purged.
True. “Battle” is probably a more accurate description of what’s going on than what I said (“war.”) After a particular position’s become untenable for them in public, they hasten to say that they never really held it at all, and then their descendants complete the whitewashing. Thus, the narrative for slavery is that the South was totally going to end it, just give them a little more time… and a similar narrative now for MLK. Eventually you’ll get something like that for gay rights.
Of course, even as they’re doing the PR damage control in public, they’re still doing everything they can in private to continue the old agenda.
There’s a minor cottage industry that makes up names for things nobody does, or that haven’t been done enough to merit coining a term. Is it truly a “thing” if it’s all-or-mostly talk? (I’m looking at you, Hot Carl.) Of course, once it’s a thing, someone will try it.
Wait a minute… you mean nobody does the “Spitting Alpaca” in their bedroom?
Those lackin’ for lovin’
Will get no dutch oven
And wipe lonely tears away
It has to be said,
Alone in a bed,
A Dutch oven can be achieved.
Pull sheets to your brow
And pass wind, so that now,
You’ve given as well as received.
Well done!
When confronted by such competition, one has to rise to the occasion.
one has to rise to the occasion.
like a bolus of flatulence…
Strangeness from a Rebecca Watson critic.
John Revolta said,
August 19, 2013 at 8:36
DAMN YOU UPSIDE-DOWN WENCH!!
I SHALL HAVE MY REVENGE!!!
MWAHAHAHAHAHAH etc.
Snh snh snh…You gotta get up pretty early in the morning to beat me.
Hey, who am I kidding – it was my first chance to be frist.
And by the bye, BBBB, thank ‘ee for correcting my blue moon misconception – I was all excited, now I’m all not…
I would’ve beat you if it hadn’t been for that extra HA.
I think there’s a lesson there for all of us.
Type faster?
It couldn’t possibly be “no gloating,” because that would be no fun at all.
I dunno the term, which surely exists
It’s called a Richard Gere,
As you can see here.
It’s haunted him through his life.
The story’s not right,
Likely told due to spite
Or jealousy about Richard’s hot wife[1].
[1] Either if them.
Oh, also too.
Felching and other ridiculous terms serve the purpose of being an in joke to those in the know. Leads to awesome stuff like Jessica Chobot grossing out Fallout Boy.
Thanks to the Interwebs & The Sad Cafe, I’m blessed to have Pam scarfing her panda along with me when I quaff my java at work.
Completely OT: Has anyone been watching House Of Cards? (Netflix-produced series starring Kevin Spacey as charismatically slimy Machiavellian Blue Dog Democratic Congressman) Whaddaya think? Potent political commentary or trite melodrama?
I think I’m going with “the cynical bastard’s answer to The West Wing” so far.
Whar tha hail is everbuddy?
Seceding.
That’s one way to get a senate majority.
UH OH.
If your nation is very pious & your party turns its preachers against you, YOU’RE GONNA HAVE A BAD TIME.
Computer Cat
Pretty soon the only commenters left will be the ones who’ve been deputized.
Says the guy who posts here more often than all of the moderators combined.
Why don’t you start the exodus yourself?
Wankity wankity wankity wank…
I assume they are at the annual Sadly, No! picnic at the petting zoo. They are probably eating ice cream and talking about all of the fun things they will do without us.
Two factors lead me to comment less frequently. (1) the more I actually work, the less I post. (2) the less I drink in the evenings, the less I post.
So where I’m concerned, any theories specific to S,N! are pure twaddle.
So where I’m concerned, any theories specific to S,N! are pure twaddle.
Wait, you’re saying it isn’t all about Pennis? The hell you say!
The Daily Caller asks the important question, to wit, “Why does Obama hate the white bitches?”
“A Portuguese Water Dog can range in cost wildly. On average, one will pay between $1,400 and $2,000. President Barack Obama has this breed of animal,” according to an answer on Ask.com.
With the addition of Sunny, the Obamas now have two black Portuguese water dogs.
The Obamas do not have any white dogs.
Occam’s Razor, how the fuck does it work?
How dare you question trollboy’s narrative. Don’t you know that he knows you better than you know yourself?
Wouldn’t dream of it. We all know his narrative is entirely based on reality and he is the most earnest commenter EVER EVER EVER
The open war with the resident troll has gotten a bit tiring.
I appreciate the work the mods do and I realize shoveling up the droppings isn’t the most fun thing in the world, but since it is widely agreed that feeding the trolls makes them more persistent (to the point of visitors being told off for feeding the trolls) I am forced question the wisdom of duly appointed reps feeding the troll. Isn’t that the equivalent of throwing half a cow carcass at the SOB?
I ran out of bullshit. I just ran out, you see.
Oops. Neglected to change nym to Howard Beale.
) I am forced question the wisdom of duly appointed reps feeding the troll. Isn’t that the equivalent of throwing half a cow carcass at the SOB?
You’re right, I’ll delete the comment. For the record, he’s had fifteen comments deleted so far today.
Is Dennis really Jim Treacher?
With the addition of Sunny, the Obamas now have two black Portuguese water dogs.
The Obamas do not have any white dogs
uhhhhhhh…derp, daily caller…you can’t get an all-white pwd…they can be black & white or brown & white but not all white…that’s some viciously stupid commenting theys got over there…
you can’t get an all-white pwd…they can be black & white or brown & white but not all white…that’s some viciously stupid commenting theys got over there…
Can’t let canine genetics get in the way of the narrative.
we have two black & white dogs…what does that say about us? i bet the daily caller mangoproducers would automatically label me a lefty librul…
Can’t let canine genetics get in the way of the narrative.
and he’s still humping the ‘obammy ate dog!’ schtick…holy crap…
For the record, this is exactly the sort of comment that keeps the sad little needledick coming back for more. Please. Stop.
Must see
You all must watch this PSA about shoot first laws.
Hey, Kevin James is an underrated comic genius.
The Obamas do not have any white dogs
Fact is, Obama doesn’t hate white dogs, but rather white people.
“Whether Paul LePage is a racist, directly, I don’t give a damn, but the only way you can ever get to the theory that “Obama hates white people” is through a thicket of racial conspiracy theories in your own head.”–Hunter
And if Obama did get a white dog and had it fixed OMGOBAMACASTRATEDWHITEY!
OMG what if Obama put some kind of ropey thing around the dog’s neck and dragged the poor beast around?
In a sense, he castrated whitey the day he was first elected. First your berries are Barry’s, then he goes back for the twig.
And if Obama did get a white dog and had it fixed OMGOBAMACASTRATEDWHITEY!
srsly, you should go read the mangoes over there…one actually thinks (i know) that you have to order a pwd from portugese even though the piece says they got the dog from some place in michigan…which of course created some ‘derp! derp! detroit!’ and ‘are we sure it was born in the united states?’ jokes…
in the end, no matter what, theys gonna bitch about obammy’s bitchez…
Why are you imitating black dialect when you’re describing things white commenters are making, bbkf? That’s odd, and it makes no sense.
prolly because i’m not typing in a black dialect?
And German Shepherds only come from the Fatherland. Pitbulls come from pits! King Charles Spaniels are owned by a king named Charles …
Dumb motherfuckers do abound.
And German Shepherds only come from the Fatherland.
Le Woof.
Please, again, explain satire to me.
I like how his twitter handle is jtLOL so folks know they’re supposed to laugh.
I think the only “acceptable” dogs any more are labs and golden retrievers. And they have to ride in the back of a pickup truck.
Of course, if Obama got a black lab there would probably still be whining.
In a sense, he castrated whitey the day he was first elected. First your berries are Barry’s…
… and then he gives ’em to this guy!
(Also – don’t miss the wrinkly Aussie PENIS on the sidebar.)
Obama SHOULD have gotten an Afghan hound because secret Muslim.
I think the only “acceptable” dogs any more are labs and golden retrievers. And they have to ride in the back of a pickup truck.
And go get stuff when you throw it.
If he got a golden retriever it would show he is hoarding goooold!
Because gibber blubber argle bargle the new sheriff is -CLANG!
Something something Border Collie messicans something. Derp.
… and then he gives ‘em to this guy!
That damned video clip started playing on its own. (I saw the story elsewhere earlier today … poor bastard. The photo of his balls filling up that sweatshirt is indescribable.)
But about the videos that don’t wait for me to start ’em: I hate these. Been encountering them lately, for ex. the Colbert clips embedded at Hullabaloo. What can I do? It sucks to hafta scroll down and turn off one or more videos, somewhere in a lengthy series of recent posts.
I am kinda disappointed that I can’t download or print Marx and Satan without paying money.
It’s not that I care to understand Ted Cruz’s formative years. Sometimes I just like reading really shitty books ‘n’ stuff.
http://www.thechristianidentityforum.net/downloads/Marx-Satan.pdf
Gee.
And your point is?
Nymchange fail?…
But back to Marx and Satan: wow, young Marx wrote (unless he didn’t) some pretty decent goth/metal lyrics [poetry]: someone should set these to music:
So a god has snatched from me my all,
In the curse and rack of destiny.
All his worlds are gone beyond recall.
Nothing but revenge is left to me.
I shall build my throne high overhead,
Cold, tremendous shall its summit be.
For its bulwark – superstitious dread.
For its marshal – blackest agony.
Who looks on it with a healthy eye,
Shall turn back, deathly pale and dumb,
Clutched by blind and chill mortality,
May his happiness prepare its tomb
—
The hellish vapours rise and fill the brain,
Till I go mad and my heart is utterly changed.
See this sword?
The prince of darkness
Sold it to me.
For me he beats the time and gives the signs.
Ever more boldly I play the dance of death.
I so feel like shredding some wicked distorted guitar right now!
Yep, SLN was I.
Wurmbrand’s book is actually pretty cool. I shall enjoy the whole of it.
Part of me thinks it would be hilarious to start a rumor that border collies are specially bred to help ill eagle messy cans sneak into the US, just to watch the overflowing diaper brigade flop about squealing Tukrjebs!
But then I realize those dumbfuckopfs would start killing any dog that fit their idea of a border collie.
I think we should start warning the wingnuts about the 2013 Don’t Drink Bleach Act that Obama wants to pass through the Congress and sign into law.
Sheep dog took my jerb!
From the Ben Shapiro (meltdown per LGM) interview by Ed Driscoll: Ben: “As you mentioned, George Zimmerman was a Hispanic Democrat. He somehow turned into a white conservative.”
God only knows why Zimmerman was a registered democrat. But lo, he can be white and Hispanic at the same time. He can even be a conservative whose last registration was democratic … Nobody on the left or in the media “turned” him into these things. He was all these things before he murdered Trayvon.
Can Marx be so easily destroyed? Is this his Achilles’ heel? Would Marxism be discredited if men knew about his connection with Satanism? Do enough people care?
The short answer is no. The long answer is no because that is so fucking stupid and fallacious I’m surprised anyone who could put it forth seriously can also remember to breathe.
The fact is, gays are obsessed with poop. They like the smell of it because they like having sex in bathrooms, and also in the bum.
I think you can figure out what the point is, Mr.-Person-Who-Wants-To-Evade-The-Killfile-That-Provides-So-Much-Relief.
More relief is necessary.
It’s good to see VS getting some positive attention over there at lgm, too bad it degenerates into the usual.
Pop pop fizz fizz, oh what a relief it is.
It is indeed and thank you.
Also, Wurmbrand is a kickass name.
CRA, we have Wurmbrand the likes of which even God has never seen.
Mr. Shapiro: […] And if you look at conservatives, there — all conservatives want to be Paul Ryan. They want to sit there and look like an accountant and explain the ins and outs of the latest CBO report. Democrats have no interest in that. They all want to be Jerry Bruckheimer, right, who happens to be a Republican — but they all want to be a bunch of — a bunch of, you know, Woody Allen types who are going to sit there and tell you a story that changes your mind on some issue or another.
Is there Wurmbrand, Stilgar?
a rumor that border collies are specially bred
“Khorgi” sounds like an Arabic name to me.
someone should set these to music:
Imma hearing them in an Ozzy Osborne voice.
someone should set these to music:
This looks like a job for Nice Pete!
Sorry, but thats’ an error on my part with SLN above , not an attempt to evade the killfile, otherwise I wouldn’t copped to it in the first place., Kinda, I dunno, defeats the purpose, and a purpose lacking feats is a very pitiful thing, IMHO.
P.S. New Achewoods up!!
Badger Avoidance Sharing Tuesday:
0:26 of video that’s pretty nice, from my Monday commute. Aw, fuck it, dig?
.
Not that it matters, or I give a shit about that sad little (teenager killing) man, but my mother was a registered Republican when she died. She lived in Orange County, CA, see, and the only way to have any political voice was to be a member of the GOP.
Long way of saying the party one registers with doesn’t necessarily reflect one’s political beliefs.
Yeah, that’s some nice sky.
New post!
It’s a little aged, but I’m sure you can pick off the mold on the edges.
Note: this is Florida. There are still gun-loving, racist Democrats lurking around in local elections, especially outside of South Florida/lower Atlantic Coast.
Remember, when Charlie Crist, late of the Republicans, ran against Rod Smith, Crist ran as the anti-racist candidate and banned “Old Folks At Home” from the inaugural celebration.
Smith, who cut his teeth as a labor lawyer, ran ambiguous ads that left open the possibility that he was an old boy racist fucker.
Things have changed somewhat quickly here and a local race party flip is inevitable. Until it happens the Florida Dem Party will be the basket case to end all basket cases. Thank dog we’re not relying on them for anything and thank your union dues for the Florida AFL-CIO. /no snark
oh, I forgot to say, this is re: Zimmerman registering D a few years back
and those assholes know all about the above
Oh, and something something chicks
Something something eagle’s sore.