But Cha Are, Blanche, Ya Are
Posted on April 15th, 2011 by Tintin
Shorter Chuck Kraphammer, WaPoOpEd
The Grand Compromise
- It is not a criticism of the Ryan plan to say that it won’t decrease the deficit without tax increases opposed by Ryan, myself and all the other Republicans. This is because the Democrats will pass those tax increases anyway.
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™
Now I want a lollipop.
The hammer of the krauts
Will drive our ships to new lands
To fight the horde, the unwashed libs…
Randtopia, I am coming!!!!
Krauthammer forgot to mention that the Ryan plan also explicitly cuts taxes, making it strangely not amenable to the tax hikes Krauthammer says are implicitly agreed to.
Okay that is really hilarious.
Ryan’s plan won’t accomplish what he claims it will. However if you add the Democrats’ plans to it, then it will accomplish what it claims it will.
In other words the calculations and estimates he put in his plan are bogus, they don’t add up, and nothing he claims it will bring about will actually come about if we follow it. If we follow the Democrats’ proposal however, and allow the Bush tax cuts on the rich to expire for example, then Ryan’s plan worked! Even though he opposes that part and didn’t include it in his plan.
This could go on forever.
My plan won’t work, but yours will, so mine will too!
These guys crack me up.
So now you better stop trying to rebuild all your ruins
for peace and trust can’t win the day despite of all you’re unions
He’s just fucking with us now, right? Right???
So now you better stop trying to rebuild all your ruins
for peace and trust can’t win the day despite of all you’re unions
This made me, as the kids say, L.O.L.
On we speed, with slashing pen…
Our only goal, to prop up rich white men!
“Reagan proved that deficits don’t matter”
– Dick Cheney, 2002
“DEAF-A-SITS IZ THA PROBLEM! TAX CUTS! TAX CUTS!
– GOP, 2011
We are your NROverlords!
This will certainly qualify as an argument that has never before been made with such care or attention to detail . . .
The only thing we hate more than a tax increase is Medicare, so if we can please, please please have a budget that kills Medicare, we’ll eat a little tax increase.
hope she does it again this year! y’all have a good weekend…i will report on the fun times when i get back…
Onward to VICTORY!!!! Hope all have a fun time.
Oh, and remember to tell everybody that Rick Scott sucks.
Damn you, B4 and Thread Bear! Now I have to join in.
We come form the land of the talk radio
where the racists rant and the gasbags blow!
oh, fuck me…i couldn’t even read the article after seeing the headline…i might have town to run downtown and get a shirt printed up reading ‘why does rick scott hate the disabled?’ or something like that…
thanks for all the good wishes…this is one weekend that i hope to never miss…if you ever need inspiration (and frankly who doesn’t nowadays?) these are the folks to hang with…
So, Citizen_X and Thread Bear, when do we reform the band?
also…i am proud to keep my personal tradition of consistent tagfail intact…it is an event i could win the gold in every freaking time…
One cut makes you richer
One cut makes you poor
And the ones that Ryan gives you
Don’t do anything at all
Go ask Boehner, when you’re an orange vore
when do we reform the band
Euphemism? Because HOT.
I call dibs on the maracas.
I call dibs on the maracas.
very hot…
Ryan’s plan won’t accomplish what he claims it will. However if you add the Democrats’ plans to it, then it will accomplish what it claims it will.
In other words the calculations and estimates he put in his plan are bogus, they don’t add up, and nothing he claims it will bring about will actually come about if we follow it. If we follow the Democrats’ proposal however, and allow the Bush tax cuts on the rich to expire for example, then Ryan’s plan worked! Even though he opposes that part and didn’t include it in his plan.
Head. Hurts.
Y’are matey!
Go ask Boehner, when you’re an orange vore
You, sir, may be history’s greatest monster…
One cut makes you richer
One cut makes you poor
And the ones that Ryan gives you
Don’t do anything at all
Go ask Boehner, when you’re an orange vore
When you go chasing tax cuts,
To reduce the deficit.
It’s safe to say, dear GOPer,
You’re arguments are shit.
Just ask Krugman, he’ll school you, twit.
Put me down for second tambourine.
Needs moar cowbell.
How can anyone argue that implicit in a plan is something that it explicitly rejects? Can we set up the guillotines now for the courtier media? I’m sharpening my pike for Chuckie’s fat head right now.
, twit.to wit.There’s a twat in a chair
Who cares only about gold,
& he’s crawling up a Stairway To Butthurt.
When he gets there he knows
That the Wingnut Welfare flows
Free of logic & easily given.
Oo-oo-oo-ooh, & he’s crawling a Stairway To Bu-utthurt.
There’s lib trolls in the hall,
Who have facts oh-so-sure,
Thank God words have at least two meanings.
Clearcut trees by the brook,
Roast the songbird who sings,
All the best paying op-eds are horseshit.
Ooooooooooh, he gets paid to blunder.
Ooooooooooh, he gets paid to blunder.
There’s a feeling I get every time his brain sharts,
And my spirit is puking for mercy.
In my thoughts I have seen him blow smoke twixt our knees,
And the facepalms of those who sit sighing.
Oooooooooh, he gets paid to blunder.
Oooooooooh, he really gets paid for this shite.
And it’s whispered that soon if we listen to this goon,
The NRO will lead us to treason.
And a new night will fall for those not appalled
And the country will go down the boghole.
If there’s a wingnut in your Intertubes, yeah get alarmed now,
It’s not just snake-oil he’s pimping.
Yes, there are two paths to run on, but in the long run
One of them ends with you limping.
Ooooooh, he gets paid to blunder.
Your head’s desk-thumping and it won’t slow, it’s a low blow
This asshat’s calling you to join him,
Dear lefty, can you smell the Jim Crow, and did you know
These lies stink even from upwind.
And as we skim on down the page
Our loathing deeper than our rage.
There wheels a dickhead we all know
Who peddles FUD and wants to show
How Reagan still rawks like a hurricane.
And if you bitch-slap him very hard
The truth will come to you at last.
When shit gets real & hits the fan
To be a ‘Naut & a wingnut-troll.
……… & he’s crawling a Stairway … To … Butthurt …
implicit in a plan is something that it explicitly rejects
Creeping Hegelianism!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
……… & he’s crawling a Stairway … To … Butthurt …
well done, sirrah! an excellent song to keep me company as i drive today!
p.s.
The lyrics are all awesome.
……… & he’s crawling a Stairway … To … Butthurt …
At the top of the stairway, there’s jim, ready with a helpful push…
So, Citizen_X and Thread Bear, when do we reform the band?
I was thinking we could just get together on karaoke night.
We are your NROverlords . . .
So much win in just one thread!
It’s a world of tax cuts
A world of cheer
It’s a world of bankrupts
A world of beer
There’s so much we don’t share
That’s it’s time you’re aware
It’s a fucked world after all
From the last thread,
Luckily for the intended victim, he smelt something fishy before diving in
This is unusual in what way?
Holy crap, my typo in one of my above comments has me going all Grammar Nazi on myself… I can’t believe I typed “you’re” instead of “your”… if this continues, I’ll have to become a Freeper.
If I only had a brain…
I could wile away the hours
Conferrin’ with the powers
Consultin’ with the sane.
Someone could wipe away my slobberin’
While my prose was busy clobberin’
If I only had a brain
I’d spout all sorts of drivel
For any paying individ’le
No matter what the pain
(Jonah)
With those lovely thoughts you’re thinkin’
You are another Lincoln!
Can I have a brain?
(Chuckles)
Oh, I would tell you why
“The Left” are such a snore
I could think of things I never thunk before
And then I’d sit and think some more
You think I’m a bluffin’?
My head’s not full of stuffin’!
(I scoff in disdain)
If by chance you’re a fairy,
Could you be my huckleberry,
And give me a brain?
Ayn Rand, reviewed: http://www.balloon-juice.com/2011/04/14/atlas-shrugged-and-critics-wept/#comment-2533733
I cannot help myself:
If you keep asking questions, the Gov’nor’s gonna quit
If you keep asking questions, the Gov’nor’s gonna quit
And if the Governor quits, True America won’t fergit.
Lamestream media loves to distort and moan
Lamestream media loves to distort and moan
And if you ask about finance, we’ll say, “Leave Trig alone!”
Break:
And now you see ’em all come, asking “Is she gonna run?”
–It don’t matter which way she goes,
because the Heartland Queen or the Combover King
can beat the Kenyan from Chicago
Repeat first verse
Hey, a verse that needs no changes:
Poor man want to be rich
Rich man want to be king
And a king ain’t satisfied
Until he rules everything
So, Shorter Paul Ryan:
I’d love to change the world
But I don’t know what to do
So I leave it up to you
If this bill passed tomorrow
Would the wingnuts still whine?
For there’s no end to the butthurt
‘Cause there’s too many shit moats they gotta find
..needs work. Let’s see some more lighters out there!
“I’d like to teach the world to shill and pay me for a while. I’d like to buy the world.” -A Koch.
ok, now I”ve got to listen to badlands.
Given the Democrats’ instinctive resort to granny-in-the-snow demagoguery…
As opposed to granny-and-the-death-panels factual analysis?
Do these people ever fucking listen to themselves?
Ah, good old Charles Fartel. At the least, you’ve got to admire the dedication he shows in the way he gamely polishes each and every turd that comes down the GOP pipe, no matter how absurd or embarrassing a position it requires him to take.
Do these people ever fucking listen to themselves?
Probably not, and they certainly don’t remember anything they said two whole years ago.
yearsminutes?Folks are dumb where I come from,
They ain’t had any learning
Still they’re happy as can be
Doin’ things Objectively
Folks like us could never fuss
With schools and books and learning
Still we’ve gone from A to Z
Doin’ things Objectively
You don’t have to know how to count or add
To know that any kind of tax is bad
You don’t have to look in a book to find
How to do a favour and get paid in kind
Ù Ù Ù Ù Û
it’s a world of tax cuts, a world of cheer…
Noooooooooo! Must…bury…earworm!
Seriously, that ride is some sinister, evil shit, and the Disney Company owes me reparations for the damage to my aesthetic sense. I’ve had no ear for music since that ride scarred me at 5 years old.
The US is a poor nation and cannot afford to invade other countries and keep its older population alive; it is time for the
citizensrulers to prioritise.AHHAHAHAHA AWESOME.
Is this the real life?
Is this just fantasy?
Caught in a bubble
far away from reality.
Shut down your brain
Hear our refrain
You’ll seeeee…
I’m just a rich guy,
I need your sympathy
Because I’m
Grab it all
With both hands
Screw you all
I’m with Rand
You live in a shithole,
Doesn’t really matter to me….
…To me
& etc.
I call it “Wingtopian Rhapsody”.
♫More music!♬
Hey now, the Small World music benefits greatly from its multi-speaker deployment. As you ride your boat slowly from room to room, sound sources advance and recede. If there’s a eskimo kid with a banjo, it gets louder as you move toward him.
Once when I was nine or ten a slightly older girl (a stranger) corralled me into riding Small World with her. She wanted to hold my hand and kiss in there. With me, I guess, because she’d have control over the proceedings.
If there’s a eskimo kid with a banjo…
Wait, are we talking about “It’s a Small World,” Deliverance, or Wasilla?
“Wait, are we talking about ‘It’s a Small World,’ Deliverance, or Wasilla?”
If it’s a small, small world, what difference does it fuckin make?
jim WIN
BBBB WIN
Jennifer WIN
T&U, that was truly awesome. A brilliant political play that almost worked, plus now the R’s have to go explain to the teabaggers back home why they voted down the budget that makes Ryan’s plan look positively socialist. Even better, the budget they did approve destroys Medicare and Medicaid, I’m sure AARP will be very happy about that.
You must not have heard — AARP is evil now. It’s hard to keep up.
Kraphammer let slip the Republican secret strategy: Spend all the money, let the Dems take the heat for paying for it.
OBS, I really hope they go after AARP, That’s like taking on the NRA.
By the way, I’m sipping on a Bridgeport Hop Czar right now. Good stuff!
Hopping the Czar.
AHHAHAHAHA AWESOME.
Hoist by their own tard.
Send all available Whaaaambulances to DC, Code Red!
Why does the GOP hate the Tea Party?
At work so I have a slightly larger adjunct monitor.
The picture of Robin O’Berkeley and very professionally done p-shooooop-a-doop of Charles Strangelove show up in their entireties on one screen w/o scrolling.
I imagined the children. Broke my brain.
Help me.
I imagined the children. Broke my brain.
Help me.
Damnit, paleotectonics, I’m a doctor, not a miracle worker!
Why does the GOP hate the Tea Party?
Because they outlived their usefulness- they’ll court the remnants (100 ‘baggers show up in D.C.? *Nelson* HAHA!! */Nelson* ) of the Tealiban sometime in the spring of next year.
Re: Ryan(lack of)care. This charming graph illustrates the intended effect.
A savings of $600 for the gummint costs $6000 to the taxpayer. Such a bargain. The total cost goes up by just about the 30% profit margin of the private health insurance industry.
Who said wingnuts can’t do math.
A savings of $600 for the gummint costs $6000 to the taxpayer.
Silly, those aren’t taxpayers, they’re parasites addicted to an entitlement program.
Who said wingnuts can’t do math.
What is mere math to the
RandianRyandian Superman?Uh, is anybody out there?
No.
No.
~
Nobody here but us.
M. Bouffant said,
April 15, 2011 at 23:29
?More music!?
“Bachmann is the female Ann Coutler!”
~
I have a Lagunitas Gnarlywine bomber but am afraid to consume it by myself, maybe wifey will help me out tonight.
Louis: us, chickens, ain’t nobody here but
Somebody stop Scott Adams before he hurts– oh, screw it…don’t. This is too delicious.
AHHAHAHAHA AWESOME.
This fills me with mixed emotions. On one hand, I am filled with a measured amount of hope that some sort of spinal column has been detected in the party that is not clinically insane but I worry my hopes will be trashed with the next “compromise” for the the sake of “unity.”
Do the Dems know that they could pick up, oh say, 30 points or so in approval polls by simply acting like non-sociopathic human beings?
Do they?
Do they?
No.
SASQ
No.
SASQ
Maybe someone should tell them.
*sigh*
no.
what’s with the cranky? The death grip on the remote control for the t.v. will not make you powerful. Especially when it doesn’t matter to you what program is on. No, it won’t. Make you powerful. No.
nah.
Maybe someone should tell them.
They are well-paid not to recognize this.
Man. I’m cynical today.
A blogger, I forget who for the moment, recently said that the GOP will spend the entire 21st century undoing the 20th. There’s simply no other way to look at it. The day will come when Obama will allow the GOP to defund SS and Medicare through tax cuts then, when the emergency really does become real, to allow them to privatize it while bitchslapping liberals for criticizing his capitulation.
Anyway, potential good news and bad news. Good news: I may have a book deal from Simon and Schuster. The bad news: By May 1st, I could become the Lincoln Author, writing books in my car.
http://www.sacred-texts.com/neu/eng/fq/fq28.htm… sacred, eh? twixt, eh? which is ickier? twixt or pork? ugh. p.s. -I haven’t felt like bugs were crawling all over me in almost a year… if there is cockroaches climbing up my esophogas and out my mouth, I can’t feel them, so I don’t vomit up the dead ones, no shells stuck like pieces of popcorn behind my tonsils…no pressure surrounding me like a scrap metal compacter, no desire to climb out of my skin… no robot insects burrowing into my back, but…I.can’t.believe.you.don’t.shut.up. Don’t push it, Jimbo.
the GOP will spend the entire 21st century undoing the 20th.
This is it in a nutshell.
Somebody stop Scott Adams before he hurts– oh, screw it…don’t. This is too delicious.
Be careful: he’s a certified hypnotist and could make you believe you’re a chicken using the same powerful forces he used to make himself believe he’s a genius.
the GOP will spend the entire 21st century undoing the 20th.
I anxiously await them proposing free trade with the Empire of Japan.
“the GOP will spend the entire 21st century undoing the 20th.”
Lets all hope that Archduke Franz Ferdinand doesn’t get shot again.
he’s a certified hypnotist
Long Form Vault Copy please.
Shorter Krauthammer:
Sophistry rules ‘cos you can just make shit up.
“he’s a certified hypnotist”
That’s just what he wants his brainwashed minions to believe.
To dredge up a Letterman joke from 1985, I’VE BEEN HYP-MO-TIZED!
cockroaches. vomiting.vomiting, cockroaches. topics deteriorating, can’t.vomit.
the Metis didn’t drown, heh? ‘cuz, they wasn’t no metis, and if they had drowned, they’d be dead. I had to take yellow twice though, and the voices were right, it’s more peaceful when the water doesn’t make yer eyes sting no more.
and the need for educational reform holds true.yah, yah, yer not clever. although, the need for educational reform is true.
no.
constitutional questions?
“the Metis didn’t drown, heh? ‘cuz, they wasn’t no metis, and if they had drowned, they’d be dead.”
Maybe they haven’t drowned yet but they are treading water what with the bad trades and the Bernie Maddoff investments. They might just be the worst run organization in all of MLB!
I had one of those the other day too, nice big IPA.
I’ve done it before, on more than one occasion. You’ll be fine. And by fine, I mean tipsy. And by tipsy I mean drunk. Go for it.
Advice for FAA controllers, make the expensive private planes bid for a landing spot.
I bet they’d pay two maybe three-thousand bucks for accurate weather.
“Be careful: he’s a certified hypnotist and could make you believe you’re a chicken using the same powerful forces he used to make himself believe he’s a genius.”
THAT is funny. I demand an N_B/Scott Adams debate on whether of not dealing with wimmin is akin to dealing with children and the developmentally disabled.
You gotta wonder about a guy who uses aliases to refer to himself as a genius. That is just really weird and childish.
That is just really weird and childish.
Hmmm, it seems to me there may be a reason women always use monosyllables and emphatic gestures when talking to him that has nothing to do with their lack of intelligence. Now if we could only explain the cornered animal look those poor, poor women get in their eyes…
???? ??????? ??????? ?? ???? ????
You gotta wonder about a guy who uses aliases to refer to himself as a genius.
He had to. His real self is enough of a genius to know he’s no genius, but the sockpuppets are dumb enough that Dunning-Kruger works.
BONOBO TV!
http://tvpc.com/Channel.php?ChannelID=290
*bangs head against wall* please don’t force me to read through the blogspots again; hahahaha I should be concerned about the notsosubliminal images on my t.v.? Gawd. I should have a nap, which suggest the stickytape will be removed from my eyelids momentarily, not that you won’t wake me up every two minutes or shut up. ever. Ohh, I better see the end of this. I better.
What government agency would I apply to for certification as a genius hypnotist? Would my Webelos Badge fulfill the necessary requirements?
What government agency would I apply to for certification as a genius hypnotist?
HHS*, one of the most Repub-reviled agencies.
*Hypnosis and Humanoid Servility.
They might just be the worst run organization in all of MLB!
Ohhhh, I dunno … At least you know who owns the team, crummy as it may be. Here in L.A. they’re still fighting over the former Brooklyn Bums.
A picture is worth a thousand blurts.
Socky Adams:
Did not know hypnosis could be accomplished through the printed page. (Does this mean my hope to be able to strangle people through the Internet is closer?) He is a genius!
Comment nugget from Substantial’s NRO link.
Hey, that stupid Constitution is over 200 yrs. old! Fuck it too.
Plus which, funny because the droolers aren’t doing anything but debating/trying to destroy the New Deal.
Grant Swank’s mind-clouding abilities are legendary.
are we so blindly partisan now that we can’t use the iconic imagery of FDR without a debate on the almost 80 year old New Deal
It’s blindly partisan for someone to bring up the New Deal when discussing a picture captioned “Ryan’s New Deal?”
But, YOU GUYS….he’s SO DREAMY.
come on and tell me that when you look into those baby blue eyes that you don’t want to balance the budget on the back of the middle class so the JOB CREATORS and ACHIEVERS can get more tax breaks.
obs, the gnarlywine is something wonderful.
Ryan’s New Deal = door #3 = dick for you!!!H!!!!!!AAA!!!!L!!!!OO!!!!!LL
Why do they need to refer to FDR at all? They could have used one of the many conservatives who are popularly associated with forward-looking optimism, human decency, and economic justice, like Phil Gramm, Burt Prelutsky, or Ted Bundy.
Since all you libs claim your awful, dehumanizing & brutal ad hominem “snark” is excused by this being some sort of humor site, here are some examples of how it is done.
Dern, I though bonobotv was 200 channels of frikkin bonobos.
There’s not even one channel in DRC.
Lotta good movies though.
Jesse James Meets Frankenstein’s Daughter
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0060558/
Shorter National Review: okay, maybe we DID fuck the poodle – but, Your Honor, just look at what that poodle was wearing! It was ASKING for it!
Ryan’s Nude Eel = Ryan/Giant Slor 2012: Being Roasted Alive Never Looked So Good!
Prof. Mrs. Meade McAlthouse has weighed in on Madison, w/ pictures of awful people & their awful, correctly spelled signs. Damn teachers.
Ann must be saving the bile, or somehow thinks the signs are condemnation enough, but her claque is at it:
*Never before in human history, until the shame was excised! Which was, what, last wk. sometime?
This almost makes everything better.
Disagreeing with the left is the only sin left. We are morally obliged to agree with them.
Project much?
Let him who is without sin start fucking indiscriminately, because…damn.
I have no problem at all with fanatic cannibalistic ax-murdering sadomasochistic sociopathic satanist racist Jimson-weed-smoking hygienically-compromised squid-fuckers, just so long as they have Che Guevara posters on their walls.
This almost makes everything better II
let him who have understanding recon…
Wow, I haven’t been here in three months. Whose idea was those curtains? I like the wallpaper in the foyer though.
Is there a troll upstream? I’m too filled with lassitude to scroll upward.
We’re all trolls now.
But more importantly, if you go to this tweet generating site,
http://yes.thatcan.be/my/next/tweet/
and type in……….oh I’ll just pick a name out of…….here’s one….
krauthammer
ya get stuff like:
MSM conceit: GOP wins Newt 94, Brown 10), its two years can match Hillary Clinton’s statement…
Gridlocked in hell aka downtown DC with the… For tomorrow?
For Barack Obama administration in debt Plug in the month – WETA music critic.
Not that the lollypop ‘shop of Kraut-of-hammers isn’t good, but looking at the image of him now adorning his pieces, is he not begging to be depicted as some combination of sprockets and a vulture?
Like this perhaps?
He’s like some kind of visual onomatopoeia of the evil that he represents.
Vultures consume rotting garbage; Krauthammer produces it.
hunchback, sheer brilliance, that.
For “JonahNRO”, it serves up fare such as
and
most of which are considerably more coherent than anything the boy has committed to print himself.
“andrewbreitbart” returns
and
Wheee!!!
Although he’s not an engineer himself, Scott Adams has apparently spent enough time around engineers to have absorbed the “I know how to read a circuit diagram so I understand absolutely everything about how the world works” mindset. Only in his case it’s “I made a lot of money drawing a comic strip so I understand absolutely everything about how the world works”, which makes even less sense.
Although he’s not an engineer himself, Scott Adams has apparently spent enough time around engineers to have absorbed the “I know how to read a circuit diagram so I understand absolutely everything about how the world works” mindset.
Meanwhile, it’s not a circuit diagram, but an illuminated copy done by some poor monk.
It’s a pity there are no mutant cannibals to give Scott his just reward.
low sodium hunchback said,
April 17, 2011 at 2:14
Dern, I though bonobotv was 200 channels of frikkin bonobos.
There’s not even one channel in DRC.
I just posted because we have had discussions about the NY beotch and her prejudice against people jobless, and bonobos. Did you find the home channel? Lts of TV from around the whorl there, yuh know.
Maybe even Isle of Mann time trials.I hope..
We’re all trolls now.
Well, of course. But where is Art Chance posting now that he is kicked off Redstate.com?
Talk about kiss-and-tell.
I just posted because we have had discussions about the NY beotch and her prejudice against people jobless, and bonobos.
McMegan?
Latest shorter on PJM (not reading the actual article): “Ryan is a serious man with a serious plan; unfortunately, Americans are a thoroughly unserious people.”
Stupid fucking American sheeple, not knowing what’s best for them. Why can’t they just leave it to the adults!
“Ryan is a serious man with a serious plan; unfortunately, Americans are a thoroughly unserious people.”
Next post, a rant about the elitism of the left?
It’s a pity there are no mutant cannibals
to give Scott his just reward.Fiqqst.
Must share. Allegedly non-troll, non-shooped, genuine unretouched flier.
Ryan is a serious man with a serious plan
A serious canal?
It’s a pity there are no mutant cannibals to give Scott his just reward.
A Canticle For Dipshitz.
Perhaps…
Also,
Fucking win.
Although normally I would hesitate to get personal, Krauthammer is just such a putz. His face (for lack of a better term) screams “Weenie!”. In his case, it’s not just his eyes that are a window to his soul – you can see his whole shrunken, twisted, shrivelled, rotted, charred, spirochete-riddled pathetic remnant of a soul in that snapping turtle snout located where his mouth ought to be. He is both a pitiable and revolting caricature of a human being. He is almost (but not quite) beneath contempt. He is ugly and smells bad. Helen Keller would have clawed out her eyes at his approach, in fear that somehow they might begin to work again if only for a second. He disgusts me.