Joyeux Noë*
When I scroll down the page looking at Newsbusters every day, it’s like five or six wingnut heads going “robble robble robble robble robble.” Next, my feed reader recommends Atlas Shrugs, which sounds like an irregular clattery noise and a constant wild, cigarette-timbred scream — like an adult in a high chair tumbling down the semicircular master staircase of a Long Island faux-marble mini-mansion, forever.
But back to Newsbusters, I noticed this morning that they were going “robble robble,” and felt that I should say something back.
Fox News Panelists Excoriate NYT’s ‘Mortgage Bonfire’ Hit Piece on Bush
By Clay Waters | December 23, 2008 – 10:14The roundtable on Monday night’s Special Report with Brit Hume on FNC was not kind to the New York Times’s hit piece on Sunday’s front page that blamed President Bush and only Bush for the mortgage meltdown, ignoring the Democrats in Congress who protected the irresponsible push for more “affordable housing” by Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac (as Times Watch noted yesterday).
Nina Easton, Washington bureau chief of Fortune magazine, pronounced herself “flabbergasted when I read this story, flabbergasted….You cannot write a story about affordable housing policies and blame it on George Bush instead of the Democrats. I mean, it’s just, it’s outrageous.”
And there’s more from there, including a choice quote from our man Krauthammer. What I don’t understand, though, about all of this blame-shifting — which started in September or thereabouts, and is now matured into an advanced game of self-referential wingnut counter-counterattack — is what they intend to do when someone, at long last, forces them to explain their math.
Above: Figures in dollars
This is just a cursory, throw-it-out-there sort of thing, and there’s a lot to be checked, added and/or corrected (like the Fannie Mae/Freddie Mac figure, which reflects the bailout total), but we have here a certain bold elegance of proportion that I am confident would not fully be lost to a more rigorous analysis.
Also, ‘Clay Waters’ is a total porn name. Also, I should sort of explain the basics of credit default swaps, to whatever extent I’m smart enough to understand them, because they haven’t been well explained — with one caveat among several being that there’s more to the problem than just CDS exposure.
Imagine, let’s say, that you could take out insurance policies on things that you didn’t own, for instance on other people’s cars. If a car that you bet on gets into an accident, you get paid — while the owner gets nothing and indeed never even knows that you exist. Imagine also that you could sell these insurance policies on other people’s cars without owning any equity in them, either, and also without the knowledge of the owners, or anything like that.
Imagine further that once you bought or sold one of these insurance policies, you could turn around and trade it to someone else, who could then repackage it and trade it to someone else, etc., and so on and so forth, many times over, with everyone betting and hedging and side-betting with greater and greater exposure on other people’s cars, in Tulipomanic fashion. This market is almost completely unregulated and without standards, such that if someone sells you an insurance policy and then sells their end of the contract to someone else, who then sells it to someone else who goes bankrupt, you end up screwed, and too bad for you. Imagine roughly 60 trillion dollars** of obligations tied up in such schemes, and in schemes-upon-schemes, and who-even-knows-what.
It’s like that, except with mortgages instead of cars — and whoopsie, as no one could ever have predicted, the housing bubble collapsed, sending defaults up and real estate prices down, and making lots of sad faces.
Aah, what the hell, I can’t resist: Here’s Dr. Krapphammer:
CHARLES KRAUTHAMMER: The only surprise I had in reading this was why it took the Times so long to get around to blaming the entire collapse on George Bush. After all, they blamed everything else on Bush, I mean, from, you know, the droughts in Kansas to Hurricane Katrina. Look, the truth is that there are two realities here. One is that we set as a national goal 30 years ago expanding home ownership, especially for low-income and minorities, and it was accelerated in the Clinton administration, and the Bush administration, Bush, who defined his ideology as “compassionate,” continued it. And the other truth is that in his administration he continued but he did try to regulate the out of control Fannie and Freddie, who were really at the root of this explosion. We had Franklin Raines in 1999, the CEO at the time, boasting that they had lowered the down payment requirements and were now going to lower the interest rates paid by these lower income subprime people, which was obviously a huge risk, and it was ignored, and it led ultimately to the calamity that we’re in today.
Sure, no, let’s pass it even further down the chain. We believe that ultimately, the fault rests with the manufacturers of Tyvek and drywall, for there would be no mortgage crisis without their eager connivance at the very root of this breakdown, without their shortsighted goal of grossly expanding the number of new or renovated houses on the market, increasing real estate inflation, as it were, while flagrantly abusing the financial system by expecting it to guarantee a mortgage for any new house they felt like insulating or covering the inside walls of. No wait, we blame the contractors, or wait, no, the landscapers. No, their helpers, the little Mexican guys.
If people like this were in a truck driving off a cliff, they’d be arguing with the cliff with their big, loud talking mouths all the way over the edge, whereupon they’d argue briefly with the oncoming ground.
Merry Christmas and fappy holidays (Chappy Chanukkah and a Riiste-Tet [cf.]), and I’ll try to check in soon!
* [It’s spelled that way because it’s ‘Joyeux,’ and then there’s no ‘l’ at the end, har har urk ow pelted with sardine cans agh.]
** Not a typo.
Love him? Hate him? How do YOU feel about our soon to be former President? Take part in a chance to immortalize your views in book form by visiting http://goodbyegeorgew.com/ and letting your opinion be read!
Check out the following article about http://goodbyegeorgew.com/:
A Movement for Participatory Democracy Sends Honest Goodbye to George W. Bush
Time and again the U.S. Constitution has been trampled since 9/11 under the jackboots of the George W. Bush Administration and an all too complacent U.S. Congress. In the wake of the landslide election results nearly routing the Republican Party from Washington, the time has come to take back our rights. One place to start is at with the momentum being built by http://www.goodbyegeorgew.com.
A veritable national movement is being facilitated by Kate Wheeler and her daughter Ashley who came up with the idea for this site as a way to speak out and release the frustration so much of America has felt after 8 years living under Son-of-Bush. The Goodbye to George W. Movement, as Wheeler calls it seems to be picking up speed rapidly.
“We just started the site and dozens of people have already written their letters. We think that the American People and the world need this. It’s a chance to tell Bush what they really think, a catharsis after so many years of a White House that promoted hatred and fear,” Wheeler said.
Wheeler pointed to the concept of homeland security as the ideological militarization of U.S. mentality. With the U.S.A. Patriot Act and subsequent legislation, Constitutional limits were taken off of federal law enforcement.
For example, the FBI has been requesting reading lists from libraries and bookstores; librarians and booksellers are prohibited from even speaking with a lawyer regarding the unconstitutional FBI requests.
According to the American Civil Liberties Union, by early 2008 more than one hundred anti-war protests had been attacked by authorities in recent years.
“Freedom of expression and democracy are among the values that the founding father amended to the U.S. Constitution and they are what has motivated us to launch the site,” Wheeler said by phone from her home in Georgia.
The Goodbye George Movement that Wheeler and her daughter initiated with http://www.goodbyegeorgew.com sets a challenge, in a real sense, to put participation back into U.S. politics. In the United States people may turn out to vote but beyond that are infrequently given forums for the ongoing voicing of their opinion to policy makers.
“We see the Goodbye George Movement as the beginning of the end to politics-as-usual in our country. Today people are writing what the really think to President Bush. We are going to keep on top of Obama as well to see that the change this country needs really happens,” Wheeler concluded.
The letters written at http://www.goodbyegeorgew.com are not only a historic undertaking as a step toward making American politics more democratic, they will also be preserved as part of history in the form of a book that Wheeler plans to publish. Copies will be awarded to the first 100 letter writers.
Gavin you poor naif. First, you know very well facts don’t enter into it. As long as they have a semi-plausible sounding explanation that blames anyone but them, that’s their story and they’re sticking to it.
Secondly, it’s not really the dems they’re blaming. No, it’s those fucking low income shitbags who are mostly not as white as normal people that are the real target.
Merry fucking Jewonacrossmass.
A four year old child is eating an ice cream cone on a park bench. You, twenty feet away, see a raccoon waddling around. You call to the child, “Hey, Connor or Gant or whatever your trendy soap-opera-ish name is, come look at this raccoon!”
The kid jumps up and, as a result, the ice cream is dislodged from the cone and falls to the ground. The kid stomps over to you and tearfully yells, “See what you made me do!”
That’s Krauthammer’s “analysis.” Plus ca change, plus c’est la dick-head.
I actually watched this segment when I returned home last night. Even though tipsy with holiday cheer (and boozeahol) I still managed to aim a few Merry Fuck Yous at my tele screen.
What a bunch of lying ass cramps these people are, not that it’s surprising. Will they suffer from constantly feeling Bush’s cock in their lying mouths when it isn’t there after January? Whose GOP cock will they suck on now to replace the feeling of ghost cock?
I am worried.
The only surprise I had in reading this was why it took the Times so long to get around to blaming the entire collapse on George Bush.
Eight years?
Republicans are completely not responsible for anything bad which happens when they are in charge of government, not even when they have an absolute majority over all branches of government, 2002-2006.
Any of those bad things are the fault of liberals and Democrats.
However, they are completely to be thanked for all the bad things which did not happen, such as all the imaginable terrorist attacks which did not happen as opposed to the completely out-of-their hands and totally not their fault in any way attacks which did occur, which are Bill Clinton’s doing.
No, their helpers, the little Mexican guys.
RUPPERT!
When history is written and Krauthammer’s grandkids are called up and asked to comment, I hope they say that Grandpa was a molester, too.
Gavin-
Why put yourself through this? Also, from that link to the House o’Bozell:
WGAS?
Also Merry Christmas all.
Anything bad that happened during Bush’s presidency was the result of Teh Clenis. Anything bad that happens during Obama’s presidency will be the fault of Obama. This logic is sound because it is central to my point, and additionally, shut up, that’s why.
I am sorry, Gavin, but you simply cannot use these “Facts” to refute a wingnut position. It is a well known truth that “The Facts” have a definite liberal bias and therefor cannot be trusted.
Either Obama traveled back in time and did it, or else it was Clinton. Or Carter. Or Johnson.
P.S. Gavin, I’d say your numbers are pretty good, relative to the competition.
Also, the fun started back in April. It’s just becoming more and more compelling for wingnuts to point the finger at everyone but themselves as the repercussions reverberate.
Why can’t we just wave this in Krapphammer’s face:
http://www.vitaltrends.info/economy/what-went-wrong-with-housing.html
OTT, but since there’s already been substantial link activity here today, this Name Bristol Palin’s Baby Contest at FDL is a fucking howler:
http://firedoglake.com/2008/12/22/water-cooler-wheres-bristols-baby-and-what-will-she-name-it/
OnTT, facts are stupid and for stupid people so you’re stupid you dickhead.
I’m pretty sure that Barney Frank and Chris Dodd said some things a couple of years ago that, absent context, can be construed to appear as if they purposefully engineered the whole mess. You can provide all the graphs and numbers and shit you want, but I’ve got quotes.
Slam dunk, motherfucker.
Slam dunk, motherfucker.
The wingnut logic perfectly encapsualted. Random anecdotes trump any and all statistical, quantitative, or any other kind of so-called “facts” you might present.
pls dunt fid teh trolls kthxbai
This 4’6″ lady told me it was all the liberals fault, and the blacks, so you can talk all the damn words and write down your little damn numbers all you want.
“Dickheads.” You have to add “dickheads,” El Cid.
Dickheads.
Heh. Chris Dodd! Heh. Chris Dodd! Heh. Chris Dodd! Heh. Chris Dodd! Heh. Chris Dodd! Heh. Chris Dodd! Heh. Chris Dodd! Heh. Chris Dodd! Heh. Chris Dodd! Heh. Chris Dodd!
Et a tout le monde, Joyeux Kenzabur? ?e!
Er, then, make that:
Wow, Craphammer very conveniently forgets Phil Gramm’s tireless efforts to get Glass-Steagal repealed; you know, the piece of legislation that came out of the last depression and was supposed to hamstring banks enough so they couldn’t cause THAT shit to happen again…
Whenever I have questions about economic issues, macro or micro, the first person I turn to for answers is a psychiatrist who writes a vague and dubiously topical opinion column for a newspaper.
Well, first I turn to Frasier Crane, a psychiatrist who talks on the radio, but he’s usually quite busy, so…
According to Phil Gramm, his legislation improved the situation, and in no way did deregulation put the market in danger. And unlike you people, he talks in good, Southern-accented English, and he talks out loud, which makes him right, and not all number-centric and sentence structure Yankees like you must all be.
STOP WAGING WAR ON MY FESTIVUS, DAMNED LIBERAL DEMONCRAPS!!!
I’m still imagining the sudden stop in the right-wing talking when the ground wins the argument.
It’s a sweet sound.
STOP WAGING WAR ON MY FESTIVUS, DAMNED LIBERAL DEMONCRAPS!!!
We’re just airing our grievances about your pole.
The Community Reinvestment Act did not force anybody to lend money to anybody. All it did was state that a geographical location could not be used to automatically exclude a loan applicant who was otherwise financially qualified.
If telling a lie 1,000 times doesn’t make it the truth, these people will try 10,000 times.
We’re just airing our grievances about your pole.
Too big for ya? (heh) I always get that complaint.
Off thread but…..I just read that your precious black J*sus is gonna be sworn in using the same Koran that Abe Lincoln used.
> The wingnut logic perfectly encapsualted. Random anecdotes trump any and all statistical, quantitative, or any other kind of so-called “facts” you might present.
Don’t forget the final, Ace trump card that any nutjob/wingnut/whacko uses to prove anything: their “gut feeling”, along with their “average Joe” credentials.
I never get over laughing at the Carter economic timeline that the whackjobs believe in.
Carter caused the bad economy from 1977-1982, but raygun produced the great economy from 1982 to 1990. Then Carter caused the terrible economy from 1990 to 1993, then Clinton caused the bad economy from 1993 to 1995, then raygun caused the great economy from 1996 to 2000, then Clinton caused the crappy economy from 2001 to 2003, then chimpo caused the great economy from 2003 to 2007, then congressional Dems caused the crappy economy from 2007 to present.
Naturally, Obama will become the prime causal agent a few nanoseconds after noon on Jan 20, 2009.
Rugged, if they’re complaining about it being too large it’s a sure sign you’re overpaying.
Rugged, if they’re complaining about it being too large it’s a sure sign you’re overpaying.
Ok, now you’re playing to my insecurities…
Aw, I kid because I love.
It’s worse then that.
Let’s say you are a relatively conservative lending institution. You keep out of the credit default swaps and such when they start in the late 90s. You continue to keep out of them, foreseeing a collapse. But you have a duty to your shareholders to make money. And other banks are making scads of cash.
You can either watch your bank fail as your profit rate isn’t as high as the market demands, and hope to outlast the tulip fanciers. Or you can buy in and hope you are smart enough to get out just before the collapse.
There actually were a few very prominent wall street types that called the crash several years ago and refused to buy in. They all failed before the crash, since they just couldn’t outlast the mania.
Of course, most people bought in, and then weren’t smart enough to get out.
I would like to thank Marco for the phrase “ass cramps”.
I would like to wish all Sadlys a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.
I don’t wanna do the “Feats of Strength”..
I gave up on nutbusters long time ago.
Could Cumhammer & his ilk just once acknowledge that they’re dealing w/ people or human beings here, rather than adjectives?
“I would like to thank Marco for the phrase ‘ass cramps.’”
Ass Cramps would be a great name for a college band.
So would Crass Amps.
In the lyrics of FEAR: “Fuck Christmas!!”
And to all you pathetic bourgeois ninnies wishing each other a “Merry X-mess: “Wise up, dipshits, before it’s too late!”
Merry X-mess: “Wise up,
dipshitsdickheads, before it’s too late!”Fixed for meme-relevance.
In the spirit of teh Holidays. I would like to offer congrats to Red Sox fans for landing Mark Teixeira.
Oh wait.
You can either watch your bank fail as your profit rate isn’t as high as the market demands, and hope to outlast the tulip fanciers. Or you can buy in and hope you are smart enough to get out just before the collapse.
Fail, because depositors are going to look at you paying 2.5% interest per annum, and Shittybank paying 4.5% because they’re making money hand over fist, and yank their money out and deposit it there.
Cuz, you know, that’s the money you’re lending out to mortgagors for their home loans. In effect, you’ve become George Bailey (nice tie in to the season, eh?) only without the resources to slap some cash on the counter when the shit hits the fan.
RUGGED, I find your tinsel distracting.
Umm, it sounds like Mr. K. may have failed to actually read that NYT article. There were LOTS of references to people who were not ignoring the huge risks. Many of them were fired by the Bush admin once they started pointing out the problems. May I conclude by saying that Mr K. must be a total moron.
Bush pardons meth dealer:
http://edition.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/12/23/bush.pardons/
We’re just airing our grievances about your pole.
Too big for ya? (heh) I always get that complaint.
Yea, I’m sure, for the right price.
In the spirit of teh Holidays. I would like to offer congrats to Red Sox fans for landing Mark Teixeira.
Damned undocumented Latinos taking all the slugger jobs in the American League…
The Community Reinvestment Act did not force anybody to lend money to anybody. All it did was state that a geographical location could not be used to automatically exclude a loan applicant who was otherwise financially qualified.
The conservative talking point about the CRA causing the housing crisis angers me more than any other at the moment. I hear it from coworkers. I hear it from classmates. I hear it from random people on the Internet. I cringe when the topic of the housing crisis comes up, because you know what words are coming. The utterly predictable words that vary only slightly from conservative to conservative.
“Oh, well you know who really screwed us over, right? It was Clinton, back when he forced banks to lend to unqualified poor people.”
It never fails. It’s getting to the point where I might bloody up the next person who says it, and I won’t regret it even as I spend the next year or two in jail.
I can spend the next thirty minutes explaining that Clinton didn’t get the CRA passed, he only made some moderate adjustments to it; that the CRA doesn’t force banks to lend to unqualified people; that it allows lenders to hold customers to the same standards as ever, minus geographical ones; that “predatory lending” and CRA lending are two very different things.
I can explain all this, and I leave with the nagging feeling that I would have gotten more satisfaction from just beating the shit out of the other person.
actor212 said,
…
Yea, I’m sure, for the right price.
ahem.
Naturally, Obama will become the prime causal agent a few nanoseconds after noon on Jan 20, 2009.
Again, I clearly remember our retarded canaries in the coalmine blaming Obama for the economic catastrophuck like three months before the election.
Let me also congratulate Angel owner Arte Moreno for re-signing Mr., Mr., Teh, Tess, Tex…Oh, never mind.
Yea, whatever.
& 212, thanks for the fiz.
OT, but one of the pardons that George Wanker Bush issued today included this name:
Delano Abraham Nixon of Neosho Rapids, Kan.
Let that one roll around in your head for awhile.
Coming at this from a different, and surely less funny, angle – the NYT article that has the robble-heads a’robbling is one in a series of articles looking at the financial crisis. At that linked page, there are 15 articles. I’d say the Times has done just a bit more than “blamed only Bush” about this.
Delano Abraham Nixon.
[Rolls about in cranial cavity for some time.]
Dan?
You liberals mark my words, George W. Bush will go down in history as a great President and statesman. So what if he has a 30% approval rating currently, Harry Truman had an even lower approval rating, and now he’s widely respected as the man who ended the Second World War.
Everyone thought that Abraham Lincoln would be considered one of the worst President’s of all time, now he’s widely considered the greatest of our Nation’s Presidents. It took half a century, but history finally redeemed Abraham Lincoln, and history will do the same for George W. Bush.
President Bush will be remembered as the man who confronted terrorism, when so many of his predecessors considered it a lost cause. He will be remembered as the man who prevented another terrorist attack on American soil for 7 years during this time of war. He will be remembered as the man who deposed two tyrannical regimes, and brought democract to, two undeseving, ungrateful nations.
He will be remembered as a war President, who despite his faults, defended the Nation he swore to protect, and led this country safely through one of its darkest hours, despite the undermining and the smears by the leftist fifth column.
Yes my liberal friends, history will redeem President Bush, just as it redeemed Abraham Lincoln. 50 years from now, President Bush will be widely considered one of our Nation’s Great Presidents.
And despite our many politcal differences, I want to wish you all a Merry Christmas.
I’m thinking it’s short for Franklin Delano Roosevelt Abraham Lincoln Richard Nixon. Campbell Jr.
I just read that your precious black J*sus is gonna be sworn in using the same Koran that Abe Lincoln used.
Actually he’s going to use the original Koran that Muhammad Ali actually wrote, er, dictated, or something.
RUGGED, I find your tinsel distracting.
More religious persecution….(Lard, why hath thou forsaken me?).
We should only hope all these people are as honorable as this guy:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081223/ap_on_bi_ge/madoff_investor_suicide
tigrismus said,
December 23, 2008 at 23:22
In the grand Republican tradition, I am claiming the semantic differential.
He will be remembered as the man who prevented another terrorist attack on American soil for 7 years during this time of war.
Well, there was that anthrax thingie. Oh, and the DC snipers. And the Wellstone assassination. Bankers nuked the economy. And the rabid pelicans, of course.
But, yeah, total hero.
You liberals mark my words, George W. Bush will go down
Fixed for accuracy.
We should only hope all these people are as honorable as this guy:
Honorable??? Republicans????
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!
And despite our many politcal differences, I want to wish you all a Merry Christmas.
Shove it up your Kwanzaa candlestick, Commanderfascist.
You liberals mark my words, George W. Bush will go down
I’ll bet the little woman thinks “It’s about frikkin’ time!”.
Hey troofie, remember you owe us a bunch of apologies for your various transgressions/mistakes/existence, as well as denouncements of your repig heroes for not resigning after 911 and/or the financial meltdown they were responsible for.
Nah, she hates it when he tries to do that.
The drunk idiot has NEVER figured out how to find the Little Man in the Boat…
mikey
You liberals mark my words, George W. Bush will go down
I’ll bet the little woman thinks “It’s about frikkin’ time!”.
Actually, I had a barfight in mind…
I’ll bet the little woman thinks “It’s about frikkin’ time!”.
“I am happy now that George calls on my bedchamber less frequently than of old. As it is, I now endure but two calls a week, and when I hear his steps outside my door I lie down on my bed, close my eyes, open my legs and think of
EnglandLynne… O Sister!”Should we start to call that “the Truman Gambit”
The cluelessness among the Pundit “Elites” is breathtaking.
Seriously, there is a point to be made that Clinton got the ball rolling with his triangualtion philosophy of seeking concensus with the radical Right Congress at the time. For example, Clinton’s re-appointment of Greenspan, elevation of uber-scumbag Bob Rubin as Treasury Sec & spokesman for all things financial and his embrace of de-regulation of banking & telecom industries.
But Jimmy Carter! In other words it’s Lincoln’s fault for freeing the slaves.
BTW. the amount of CDSs traded has now exceeded $1 QuadTrillion. So the above chart underestimates the damage this elaborate Ponzi scheme has caused.
You’re right, DrDick, the guy was a Frenchman
BTW. the amount of CDSs traded has now exceeded $1 QuadTrillion.
I am unfamiliar with this number.
How many zeroes does it include?
mikey
It’s one trillion x 1,000. There are only 15 zeroes following the 1.
Or you could just make them read (I’m thinking toothpicks propping their eyes open ala A Clockwork Orange) the Bush appointed Republican FDIC Chairperson, Sheilai Bair, who says it with much more authority.
My recommendation is to force them to read that and only then beat the shit out of the dickheads. For bonus points, you could wish them “Merry Christnas” while bashing their tiny little heads.
It’s one trillion x 1,000. There are only 15 zeroes following the 1.
Or 24 zeroes, if you live in a long form country.
From a Sept. 30, 2008 report in the AsiaNews.it.
Written by Maurizio d’Orlando
Later on in the same piece.
Pope Joey Rat likens homosexuality and gender reassignment to spiritual pollution.
Well Krauthammer (the world’s sexiest pundit….ROFL), does have a point about th drought in Kansas. Culturally, the drought is only growing. Ahh, the Krauthammer.
OK, I’m sick and it’s Christmas. Please keep me company. The Bing Crosby will kill me slowly otherwise.
Oh yeah? Well I estimate the possible value of all derivatives as $600,000,000,000,000,000,000,000.
I believe the true cost is 3.2 angelpintillion.
Cherubim or Seraphim?
If we make a few assumptions:
1) financial instruments are fungible
2) 3/4 of the CDS are the responsibility of US citizens or corporations
3) the total owed on CDS paper is $500,000,000,000,000
then we can figure out the “proper” level for the DJI. I put the numbers into Excel and came up with:
-355,443.5
Therefore, the DJI only has to fall another 363,863 points for the economy to straighten out!
chimpo will be vindicated! He will be looked upon fondly by citizens in the future as they go about their daily Soylent Green gathering expeditions.
African or European?
You don’t get the right calculations by doing a bunch of stuff with numbers, Dickheads. You do it by talking to the real people, the real people who work and who don’t go back-packing and who aren’t the blacks. That’s how you do proper figgerin’.
Having just returned home from my job (for now, still!) in commercial real estate finance, I must once again shake my head at the idiots who believe that the Community Reinvestment Act created the world’s biggest real estate bubble.
Furthermore, it’s time we got the goobermint off the backs of everyday worrking peeple!
> You do it by talking to the real people, the real people who work and who don’t go back-packing and who aren’t the blacks
What are these curious things called “jobs”?
Jim Zorn Palin, if you were born to Sarah Palin, your name would be:
Chalk Revelations Palin
I must once again shake my head at the idiots who believe that the Community Reinvestment Act created the world’s biggest real estate bubble.
It’s all those pesky blacks buying houses in my neighborhood, I tell ya’. Bring back redlining and that $6.5 quatro-tup-dilly-tillion will reappear in the value of credit default swaps.
Loneoak, these are the same people who believe Saddam sneaked his WMD off to Syria (because he did it at night, when we couldn’t see him).
Rush and company can sell them anything.
Meanwhile, in the Race to Teh Buttocks front, Wal-Mart has settled wage theft claims of around half a billion. These clearly supports the contention that unions are solely responsible for the decreasing economic power of the working class in Merikuh.
..just think how much Wal-Mart would have had to steal if those had been union workers working off the clock! damn unions!!!
I think we need to update the automakers’ bailout so that that Wal-Mart settlement comes out of those fat lazy retired GM workers’ pensions.
No wait, we blame the contractors, or wait, no, the landscapers. No, their helpers, the little Mexican guys.
D’oh! I knew I shouldn’t have demanded payment in (mortgage/kumquat futures/dead peasant) derivatives! Sorry guys! My bad.
Btw , Lou Dobbs made up that Mexican crap . I’m Swiss/Onondaga. I only look like a (blond) Mexican 😉
Are you kidding? They’re already blaming him.
Clinton fucked up half of poor shrubby’s 8 years, and Obama traveled back in time and knocked over the other half.
*sob*
IT’S NO FAIR!
*sob*
financial instruments are fungible
Hey, I scour the woodland lookin for medicinal fungi…they’re “financial instruments” are they? Tarnation, I’ll never get the hang of this modern jibber-jabber.
How much of that is derived from ergot?
[garbled speaking from offscreen]
…
Seriously?
Gonna be a loooooong trip, brothers and sisters.
Might be time to break out the ether.
[more garbled offscreen sounds]
Yes, you can get still get it.
NAPA.
Filed under starting fluid.
Hug anybody who doesn’t run. We’re gonna need the good vibes.
First, I’d like to wish everyone a merry solstice.
Second, I’d like to know how many of these failed mortgages are actually heavily leveraged investment properties rather than actual first time home buyers.
In as much as today is Festivus and all, I’d like to air my grievances, starting with the papists. Here’s a wonderful faith-hate song we sing in my Aryan church:
Do the Hokey Cokey
Put your left leg in
your left leg out
In
out
in
out
shake it all about.
Do the Hokey-Cokey and you turn around
That’s what it’s all about.
I like Cokey
I like Cokey
I like Cokey
Knees bent
arms stretched
rah
rah
rah.
Put your right leg in
your right leg out
In
out
in
out
shake it all about. . . .
Put your left arm in
your left arm out
In
out
in
out
shake it all about. . . .
Put your right arm in
your right arm out
In
out
in
out
shake it all about. . . .
I like Cokey
I like Cokey
I like Cokey
Knees bent
arms stretched
rah
rah
rah.
Put your whole self in
your whole self out
In
out
in
out
shake it all about. . . .
I like Cokey
I like Cokey
I like Cokey
Knees bent
arms stretched
rah
rah
rah.
What kind of voodoo do all these poor black people know that they forced these Wall Street titans to give them $700 billion in houses for no money?
Righteous Bubba Palin, if you were born to Sarah Palin, your name would be:
Gamebird Kelp Palin
El Cid Palin, if you were born to Sarah Palin, your name would be:
Icepick Motor Palin
MzNicky Palin, if you were born to Sarah Palin, your name would be:
Log Justice Palin
RUGGED IN MONTANA Palin, if you were born to Sarah Palin, your name would be:
Froth Moonshine Palin
The Palin name generator has different results if you don’t add Palin to the end of the name input, eg:
RUGGED IN MONTANA, if you were born to Sarah Palin, your name would be:
Buster Taint Palin
Your mileage may vary.
Gamebird Kelp Palin
Totally believable.
ooh, I’d give my right arm to be Buster Taint!
Buster Taint?
I’m sorry, we are not gonna tolerate violence against women.
Now you kiss and make up with Sarah’s taint…
mikey
mikey Palin, if you were born to Sarah Palin, your name would be:
WMD Cessna Palin!
w00+!!11one!
Smut Clyde Palin, if you were born to Sarah Palin, your name would be:
Gravel Blood Palin
Goddam it, I’m a Piper man. You ever try to land one of those fucking high wing cessnas in a crosswind?
Flare and float, float, float, oh shit, I’m no longer over the runway, I’m in the NEXT GODDAM COUNTY!!
mikey
Icepick Motor Palin
That’s the coolest one, but it’s pretty clear that the Palin Name Generator’s got my number.
I’m in the NEXT GODDAM COUNT(R)Y
(you and the WMDs)
The fact is, I like the way you move, daditditdit.
Sirius Lunacy, according to the Wikipedia:
There was an article in the SF Chronicle about the folks who carried multiple properties as investment last year:
Yep.
Sat here and watched the whole thing unfold.
But here’s my question.
All of a sudden, I get this sense that I’m supposed to have some kind of sympathy for the idiots who MADE these loans.
Here’s a hint, dickheads. All y’had to do was say “no”. Oh, what, GREED got in your way? Well, hey, FUCK you.
Suck. On. This.
mikey
Well, this is fun. Someone care to draw this to her attention?
Ack. Try this instead.
Gary Ruppert Palin, if you were born to Sarah Palin, your name would be:
Shank Piston Palin
Gary Ruppert, if you were born to Sarah Palin, your name would be:
Bush Gator Palin
the graph is Gigantor Bum with Tiny Crack
Simba B said,
December 24, 2008 at 5:24
Ack. Try this instead.
Speaking as the practical chalk “break it down” d00d I am now pretending to be, where did the poop go?
Truly we cannot comprehend the Elysian fields of teh stupid that Krauthammer has ascended. Alone he travels the sunny uplands, fields of waving plants of some kind, waving in a field like manner.
THE POOP IS IN THE SHOES!!!
http://thepoorman.net/2008/12/23/chickenhawk-of-the-year-2008/
So. We need to be on the watch for a shoe-pooper terrorist, or am I mixing my metaphors?
so then credit default swaps are essentially dead peasant insurance for the new millenium?
SHOE POOP THERE IT IS
FYWP!
FYWP.
Imagine having a whole warehouse full of blank paper, printing presses, $100 engraved plates and train cars of ink.
Oh, and nobody bothering to check the bills…
I think a Jenga metaphor works pretty well.
Not by might, nor by Urim, nor by dreams: therefore I will send thee to shame. Which covenant he made narrowed rests round about, and in thy land, and unto wizards that peep, and that followed, cried, saying, Hosanna; Blessed is the pen of the LORD their God am holy. And if he be missing, then shall this man thus speak blasphemies? Who can heal thee? Thy prophets have daubed it?
THE POOP IS IN THE SHOES!!!
Told you not to piss off the cat.
Oh yeah.
We’re the Peeps that peep.
Magic peeps. Who, uh, PEEP.
Peeping peeps. Who peep.
Um,ok?
Ok, I didn’t want to say anything about this earlier, because I’m a liberal and I’m all hell-bent to destroy Christmas and wanted to make sure none of you could order these for Christmas gifts…but now that it’s too late to have it overnighted in time for the big day, there is, in fact, a 2009 Sarah Palin calendar, now marked down to an attractively low price!
And hey, it’s already got a “pre-drilled hole” for hanging!!!
Drill baby, drill!
Santa Claus is in the red:
It’ll take some time to get ahead.
All the elves have bid adieu
So now he just brings reindeer stew.
Santa Claus is in your head
St. Nicholas is in your head
You make the game, you stay the same
You rearrange him til he’s fed
Unlock the door, throw away the key
There’s someone in your head but it’s not he
Told you not to piss off the cat.
Ummm…..that’s not cat poop………..it’s BADGER POOP!!! Run, damnit, run like you’ve never run before!!!
Would someone from SadlyNo please rip rapist Dennis Prager a new one?
Please?
Would someone from SadlyNo please rip rapist Dennis Prager a new one?
Not my type, but I am pretty sure that you could find some boys down at the local leather bar who would be glad to oblige.
M: Wasilla Stickblade Johnston or Russia Animadverto Johnston.
F: Crystal Joy Johnston or Lady Wolfjager Johnston.
That should be Russia Domoanimadverto Johnston.
Ahem.
comsympinko Palin, if you were born to Sarah Palin, your name would be:
Loin Falcon Palin
I’ll ignore the disgusting misogyny and just make a pragmatic appeal: sex with an unenthusiastic partner is *bad*. I experienced this sometimes with my first real girlfriend, before learning to read the signs and not initiate sex when she clearly didn’t feel like it. Going through with it is no fun psychologically or physically.
The tree’s knocked flat
The bulbs are smashed
Up on the roof
Some thing has crashed
The stocking’s full
Of fleshy bits
And gore and goo
are where dad sits
Gone’s the plate of
Blood and brain
Zombie Santa’s
Come again
“comsympinko Palin, if you were born to Sarah Palin, your name would be:
Loin Falcon Palin”
According to the Ex Meus Secundum Palinominative Matrix, your name would be Romanes Eunt Domus Palin.
There once was a “man” was called Prager
Who drank way too often of Jaeger
Thought women were whores
And his friends were all boors.
The point of his life remains vaguer.
I like it.
It’s got a savage, meaty effect. Mmmm….savage meat….acchhhhbbbllllggghhhh…
Dooes me win teh intrnits???????????
Dennis Prager , if you were born to Sarah Palin, your name would be:
Blitz Harden Palin
It’s “misogynist”
Say it, learn it; live it too.
Go and sin no more.
Please forgive me if I’m being redundant:
Youre a bum
Youre a punk
Youre an old slut on junk
Lying there almost dead on a drip in that bed
You scumbag, you maggot
You cheap lousy faggot
Happy christmas your arse
I pray God its our last
The boys of the nypd choir
Were singing galway bay
And the bells were ringing out
For christmas day
I could have been someone
Well so could anyone
You took my dreams from me
When I first found you
I kept them with me babe
I put them with my own
Cant make it all alone
I’ve built my dreams around you
The boys of the nypd choir
Were singing galway bay
And the bells were ringing out
For christmas day
Merry fucking xmas, all.
In the grand Republican tradition, I am claiming the semantic differential.
You, sir are no Charles E. Osgood.
The feline poo is in your shoe
Your shoe is full of feline poo
You raise the scoop, you shift the poop
You re-arrange it till it’s clean
You lock the door, And throw away the key
The cat will still get in and pee.
And if the kitty’s box gets full up way too soon
And if there’s nothing left to spoon
And if your head explodes with odors in the room
You need to change the litter pretty soon
The problem seems to be that these damn financial types don’t understand munnies.
We need to get some practical people in there, like plumbers.
Would someone from SadlyNo please rip rapist Dennis Prager a new one?
After reading Prager’s offering, I’m convinced that he wrote that just so he’d be linked to by outraged feminist blogs. It’s just too obviously stupid and transparent. “Women must submit to their husbands in a biblical fashion!” Please. even the mouthbreathing Christianists aren’t that troglodytic.
commie athiest, ya brung a tear ta me eye. That’s my very favoritest xmas song of all!
The problem seems to be that these damn financial types don’t understand munnies.
Once you pull off the bandages you will begin to see our monetary system’s crumbling foundations.
There are about ten pages of Thomas Perry’s “Dance for the Dead” that ought to be on everyone’s reading list. This isn’t the first time outta the gate for the big shitpile.
Pages 73-83 or so, if memory serves.
But every page of “Metzgers Dog” is not to be missed.
Perry Rocks…
mikey
Clinton fucked up half of poor shrubby’s 8 years, and Obama traveled back in time and knocked over the other half
So, would the Krauthammer-produced SF flick be “Black to the Future” or “Barack to the Future”?
hey, when ya gotta go…
it was those fucking pelicans, I tell ya.
vise peeper palin,
signing off
it ought to be vice peeper, though.
The problem with writing for the moment is that it’s unclear whether our future Googloid robotic masters will be down with the Hamburgler. It’s still the best opening paragraph of the month.
I iz in ur munniez
Crappin’ on u
Seems I share my Buster Taint Palin moniker with RUGGED. Well, I had it first, bucko.
At least I won’t abuse the cruise control.
The verses of “We Wish You A Merry Christmas” are kind of threatening enough, especially when ol’ Bing sings them. Give us the figgy pudding! Right now! We won’t leave until we’ve got some! So give it right now! Fucking figgy pudding now bizzzzzzitches!!
Ahh, that song cracks me up.
Dear Sadlynauts,
The Washington Times is reporting that the hot, hunky, headline-stealing, sizzling Barack Obama topless photo… oh, sorry. Got carried away there.
Anywho, they’re reporting that Brent Bozell spent hours examining that photo of Obama and came to the conclusion that it was staged.
Stay with me now, because the real story is this:
The Washington Times thinks that Former President Ronald Reagan, who was both a swimsuit model and a lifeguard in his younger days, was a veritable icon of presidential pulchritude.
The verses of “We Wish You A Merry Christmas” are kind of threatening enough, especially when ol’ Bing sings them. Give us the figgy pudding! Right now! We won’t leave until we’ve got some! So give it right now! Fucking figgy pudding now bizzzzzzitches!!
On a not unrelated note, I was alarmed to hear the Parliament song in which they exhort the listener to “give [them] the funk”, further adding that they “want the funk”, “need the funk” and “gotta have that funk”. It seems to me that an organisation with such an adequate supply of funk as Parliament – indeed, it’s hard to imagine a more funk-endowed group – should not be selfishly demanding additional funk from its more funk-poor supporters, particularly in these funk-strapped times. It’s sadly typical of our times to see the super-funk-rich hypocritically advocating socialistic funk redistribution when it suits their own needs.
Maybe the initials FM/FM remind them of all the hot poontang they missed out on while the lascivious DFH cadres were playing those wicked-ass FM stations in the background on their Quadrophonic Hi-Fi’s (you know, the ones that played entire albums at a time of raunchy or ultra-far-out primo rawk) to accompany their prurient fornicatory exploits.
Or maybe they’re just racist/elitist pin-dicks.
How sad am I?
It took me ALL DAY to get the joke behind the title … after it was explained in the post. I’m not even drunk OR stoned, damnit.
Got Yuletide loot in the form of a new ‘puter – hot diggity dog – it’s sort of like having a baby, if babies were born in the midst of their Terrible Twos. Wee-hah! Which cyber-Pampers will I get to change next?
Between THIS bundle of joy & doing a 12-hour graveyard-shift on JC’s birthday, I’m so fuckin’ full of holiday cheer I may have a tinsel-related aneurysm.
So … all I’ve got to say is: ho ho HO!!11!1
Not to mention that whole bizness of getting down just for the funk of it.
Indeed. Getting down should always be done with a view to sustainable community stability, rather than short-term funk gain.
I’ll ignore the disgusting misogyny and just make a pragmatic appeal: sex with an unenthusiastic partner is *bad*.
In Prager’s defense, who would be enthusiastic with him?
Actually he’s going to use the original Koran that Muhammad Ali actually wrote, er, dictated, or something.
There is strong evidence that the Koran was ghostwritten by Bill Ayers. There was a nautical reference.