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Teh Gay Is Teh Hilarious
ABOVE: Steve Crowder’s Glam Shot You just know that the good times are gonna roll when a post at Big Andy Brietblart’s Group Blob and All-Night Buffet-Style Wingnutateria starts off like this: I’m sure that I’ll get some heat for this, but I feel it is timely to say … When wingnuts apologize before they’ve […]
Mark Noonan To Gays: “Stop Making Us Hate You, You Stupid, Stupid Fruits!”
The man, the myth, the Noonan: Way to Bring us Together, Obama Yep, we conservative Christians are just a bunch of hijackers… HARTFORD, Conn. (AP) – Sen. Barack Obama told a church convention Saturday that some right- wing evangelical leaders have exploited and politicized religious beliefs in an effort to sow division. “Somehow, somewhere along […]
The Gays Have Hatched a Gay Secret Gay Plot to Make Everyone Gay
Yes, it turns out that those wacky homosexuals are trying to convert everyone to gayness again. Lucky for us, the American Familiy Association is on the case: Activist: Gay Straight Clubs About Promotion, Not Protection By Jim Brown March 13, 2006 (AgapePress) – A pro-family advocate says leaders of Gay Straight Alliance clubs in schools […]
Football! Soccer! Let’s Call the Whole Thing- Absolutely Fucking Amazing!
The secret commie mind-control device that is turning every single one of your children gay right now. Bernie Goldberg, National Old Men Yelling At Clouds: The Anti-American Pastime* Bwahahahahaha! *Snort* Bwahahaha! And then, with the Bwahahaha! Oh man, my poor sides. One second. Just roll the PFFT- Shorter (or the last port before Jungle): Hurgle […]
This Is The Reason We Can’t Have Nice Things
Whenever I do the blog thing, after a while — and it’s happening again — I inevitably get sucked into an Althousian vortex of distracting bugfuckery and I end up with a half dozen incomplete drafts; not, I think, because I have ADHD but because, unlike George W. Bush, I’m curious about too many things. […]
Taming of the Slut
1. You’re a Slut. 2. Your slutty sluttiness. 3-10. SLUT! WHY ISN’T THIS MAKING YOU GO MAKE MENFOLK SAMMICHES AS IS YOUR PLACE?!? Jeannie DeAngelis, American UnghUnghUNNNNH!!!: Sextra Credit and the Rehabilitation of Sluts* Oi. This election season. I mean, every time the Smiler opens his mouth is a wonderful gift from Snark Heaven, but […]
Obama Must Have Been the Most Badass 10-Year-Old Ever!
If I can just get ten Obamas in a row, then the 2008 election never happened. (P.S. Thanks Tintin) Jack Cashill, American Conspiracy Theory Breeding Ground: What the Mailman Knows about Ayers and Obama What the mailman… Sorry, one sec. What the mailman knows about Ayers and Obama… … Congratulations. Tha may very well be […]
Thesaurus is Unconstimatutional
OMG! Writing iz Hard! How U ErrAz Pen WRiTng on Com Putter Screen?!? Iz Impossible! (Burp) (Fart) Mona Charen, National Depantsing: Gender-Specific Writer The crappy in-program proofreader on my discount word processing program is a secret liberal plot to steal my freedom to write terribly. Sigh. I write for free for a comedy website in […]
Would You Say This Loss Feels Like Having Something Shoved Down And/Or In Something?
The question is purely academic in interest, I assure you. Ed Whelan, National Review Online: Ninth Circuit Panel Affirms Anti-Prop 8 Ruling So as you may have noticed from the hordes of QUILTBAG people fucking outside of your home (all of your homes and every home, multiple of your homes if you are John McCain), […]
Just Because Rockets Shoot Out His Butt Doesn’t Make Him A Launching Pad
Sometimes John prefers not to eat with the otherinmates This was going to be a shorter, but I think that it violates some basic tenet of shorterism to use the title as the shorter, even if the title is, fairly clearly, gobsmackingly stupid. We’re talking here “IF CORPORATIONS AREN’T PEOPLE, HOW CAN THEY BE GREEDY?”, […]