I am for ponies. They drive the Iraq War.

Do something as simple as checking the “label” of the item to see where it’s made.

Like the American shirts made in the Northern Mariana Islands. It may be slave labor, but, dammit, it’s our slave labor!

Yep, just as easily as checking the label…

India, Laos, Pakistan, India, China, China, China, Mexico, India, Honduras, China, Guatamala, Saudi Arabia…

The only place in the entire town that has any clothing still made in Canada is Mark’s Work Wearhouse, and even that selection has been shrinking the last 6 years.

The funny thing is that only the store brand is made in Canada. The jeans sell for about $30 a pair. The “Brand Name” jeans they sell are $30-70 per pair, yeat all of them are made overseas in potential sweatshops.

Screw Free Trade. Give me Fair Trade: Charge overseas companies tariffs that they can eliminate by increasing their environmental and labour standards to the stricter standards of the importer. I want to be sure that when I buy a shirt that says “Made in China”, that I’m actually improving the quality of life for workers in that country, rather than participating in the race to the bottom.

“Where is the outcry from the Left?” I mean, I realize it’s only been nearly eight years since the WTO protests in Seattle, but if you’re going to rhetorically ask “where is the outcry from so-and-so” on your internet thingie, doesn’t it make sense to spend fifteen seconds on Google first?

My Dad has refused for years to buy stuff made in China, mainly due to their labor laws. I was all about the “made in the USA” label, at least until I learned about the Northern Marianas.

Holy crap, where do you find these fools? It’s like you’re digging for the platonic ideal of retarded writing. He bitches about the passing of good old days when there was a repairman for every appliance. He asks and answers his own questions. His spell check feature is “strangely slient” about errors. His only authority is Wikipedia. He formulates strange phrases (“boxing character ‘Rocky Balboa’ of the movies”). He blames the nebulous “regulation” without telling us if it’s child labor laws or workplace safety rules that he dislikes. What a freaking perfect storm of stupid.

The “I am for business” line is like the Madden soundbites in his many and varied videogames, where he says, “To win this game, one of the teams is going to have to score some points!”

Thanks, scoop.

OK, I found a way to relate the two unrelated posts herein. How about if the top girl-on-girl adult movie of 2002 is “Checking the Labia.” Get it? Get it? Har!

I am for engines. They move my car.

“Where is the outcry from the Left?” I mean, I realize it’s only been nearly eight years since the WTO protests in Seattle, but if you’re going to rhetorically ask “where is the outcry from so-and-so” on your internet thingie, doesn’t it make sense to spend fifteen seconds on Google first?

Aren’t the same people who whine about the lack of “outcry from the Left” on this subject the same ones who’ve been telling us to shut the fuck up and sit in the corner and be good quite citizens for the last six years, when they’re not accusing us of being buddies with assholes like Pat Buchanan (and therefore tainted with his anti-Semitism) who are right on this particular subject but neverthless should rightfully be shunned as modern-day Know-Nothing nativists?

And no, they don’t spend any time with Teh Great Gazoogle, any more than CNN does.

I am for fiber. It moves my bowels….

mikey

I am for feet. I walk on them.

Me, I’m against business, as I hate the economy.

Also I’m against the use of money to exchange for goods and services. If the barter system was good for Jesus it’s good for me. How many heads of cattle for a new car?

An Ode To My Legs, Upon Which I Walk:

I’ve got two legs from my hips to the ground
And when I move ’em they walk around
And when I lift ’em they climb the stairs
And when I shave ’em they ain’t got hairs

I am for female genitalia.

Um, at least I used to be.

Dammit…

mikey

It drives the U.S. economy.

It puts the lotion in the basket.

I am for feet.
Iamb for feet!

I am also for beer, because it tastes like beer.

I’ve got two legs from my hips to the ground
And when I move ‘em they walk around
And when I lift ‘em they climb the stairs
And when I shave ‘em they ain’t got hairs

And when I tattoo ’em, they’re green and blue
And when I count ’em, let’s see. One. Two.
When I hike in shorts they get a rash
When I get drunk with my machete, they get a gash…

mikey

I am for slave-drivers. They drive the slaves.

I’m pro-business too!

I’m pro-business!

Me too!

Ken, John, Bernie: If any of you pikers were really “pro-business”, you wouldn’t have gotten caught.

Or at least you’d have come up with better lies after you were caught.

Pikers.

Can I just say here that if the people who populate the eHarmony television commercials are representative of the people I might meat on that site, I’m gonna stick to weird building projects, the intert00bz and masturbation. Because those are some unpleasant looking folks….

Sorry.

You were saying?

mikey

I witnessed the physical manifestation of wingnuttia in my neighbourhood today. A middle-aged loudmouth, not watching where he was going on a two-lane pedestrian walkway, kept slamming into oncoming people. At every slam he’d curse the people he slammed into as if his bumbling idiocy was their fault.

When nuts say they are “for” business, what they mean is they are for war, because war drives the economy. (See: Dow 14,000.) I believe it was Santa Clausewitz who said, “War is just the extension of commerce by other means.”

C’mon, Sadlynauts. Help me out here. The nomination for Funniest Blog that is currently getting the most votes is the nom for DUmmie FUnnies. Do I have to horrify you with an example of their humor?

OK, don’t say I didn’t warn you. Take this:

John Edwards received a cucumber cream facial treatment at the Pink Sapphire Salon. However even Edwards has his limits since he turned down their offer of a banana yogurt enema.

Badda—-BOOM!!!

If you all don’t go over there and add your nominations, or vote for the S,N! nominations that are already up, I’ll post another one of DUFU’s jokes.

I’ll do it. I will.

I am for the Bills kicking the Cowboys’ ass tonight.

OK Marita, ya got me. Of course, you won’t read this post until tomorrow, if then.

I am for humour in bear alert notices to the public.

(I added my nomination for SadlyNo.)

Labelling products. Feh. Another liberal idea, and look where it’s gotten us? We have to read “Made in China” on everything. I told you liberals were bad!

Yeah, maybe, but do you even realize how many perimeter and area defense weapons can be made from drano?

Ok. I’m in a very dark place tonight.

But I’m going to pan-roast a duck breast, make a winter squash puree with cinamon and maple syrup and bake some dinner rolls.

And then, I’ll be all peaceful and accepting and shit…

Sure….

mikey

Second mikey’s take on e-harmony. Can’t hit the mute button fast enough. Fucking pod people/

I am objectively pro shoes for industry.

shoes for today,
shoes for feet, feet for legs,
shoes for brakes.

Damn, mikey, I was gonna invite myself over to help you out with that duck breast but it sounds like a wrong turn on the way to the bog carries the risk of intimate contact with a homemade Claymore. Yikes.

I am objectively pro jerk-people finding each other.

Lost damsels forage,
Men hunt sex for large trailer,
Schmoes find true love.

Me, I’m against business, as I hate the economy.

Me too. The Economy had sex with my wife, and then ran over my dog when it was leaving my house.

Noises for Teh Leg.

Fuck the cowbell. What this world needs is more theremin.

I am objectively pro gigantic self-propelled bar-b-q’s

Ginormous grill,
Cooking v-396 hemi,
Hot dog on gear shift.

http://www.allamericanclothing.com/

Good outfit, I’ve ordered many times. Somehow I don’t think that would satisfy teh wingnuts, cuz’ all these clothes are union-made.

Joba, if I could wear a pair of those Duck Coveralls every goddam day?

Otherwise I wanna live in the tropics.

A pair of shorts, or those serious goddam coveralls.

Everything else is just pretense…

I am for hamsters. They drive the intertubes.

I am for external use only. In the case of accidental ingestion flush with water and seek medical attention.

I am for gerbils. They power the Richard Gere rumor mill.

I am for skin.

It gives me an excuse….

mikey

here’s a label ol’ cliff should read:

http://www.lepow.com/tag/

Oh, sorry. Clif is a good guy. My bad.

Fuck the cowbell. What this world needs is more theremin.

No, we don’t. I once saw a cowpunk band that prominently featured a theremin. They covered “Free Bird”. Fucking nailed it, too, and trust me, I know that solo. Everything else is just…lacking.

And I’ll back up them duck-hunting coveralls. Warm and snug, yet plenty of freedom of movement, which is extremely important when hunting the wiley duck. Or, more acurately, avoiding the wiley game warden because your shotgun isn’t properly choked off.

Or you’re fishing with Salutes in bottles….

mikey

http://nosweatapparel.com/ is another one

Gawd. You’re all drunk here! Drunker than me!

Damn.

That sucks.

For YOU!!

(Go Indians)

mikey

I bought a pair of No Sweat black and white sneakers several years ago. Still wear ’em. They’re well made.

Taiga Works‘ Gortex and fleece apparel is made in Canada. It’s better made and cheaper than the made-in-China crap Mountain Equipment Co-op sells. It also comes with a lifetime guarantee.

I am for business. That’s why I sell crack…

Personally, I am all for water – it cures my hangovers!

I am for motherfucking asswipe right wing retards learning when (and infinitely more importantly, when NOT) to use “quotes”. like that there, for instance, is fucking wrong.

i’m also for people paying me millions of dollars to do very little except sit around drinking johnny walker blue label, or maybe a 35 year old glenlivet.

Whatever it is, I’m against it.

g,
Nope. I quit drinkin’ almost three years ago, now. I am stoned, however, and I may go watch Horse Feathers for the seven millionth time. “Everyone says I love you…”

I am for sex, when I am involved.

I am also for drinking.

I am conditionally for theramin, the condition being it cannot be playing “freebird”.

I am for Bruce Springsteen.

The Cleveland Indians.

And Gigawatt amplifiers.

That go to _______________.

Sure….

mikey

I am for women who don’t know what chloroform is…

or a delicious roofie colada.

In bad mood. Various reasons.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Sx0Qc18RHE
Enjoy Pumaman.

I am for the war,against the troops.

Chloroform because that is the only way you can get you some, akadad and some guy?

Although I s’pose you’d “get some” in prison…

I am also for the invisible hand of the free market,caressing my nether regions.OOH! a significant gain in my private sector….

Chloroform because that is the only way you can get you some, akadad

I’m glad to see you got the joke…

Mark Steyn outdoes himself – see TBogg.

I am for stuff too. Notably, I am a for apple, and j for jacks.

I am conditionally for theramin
I tried some of that theramin once, but it just kept me awake for 36 hours.

I is for looking with.

I am for dirt. It absorbs the manure.

I am for manure. It grows the flowers.

I am for paintings by Colin McCahon.

I am 4’5″. Because seven ate nine.

I am for hyacinths but not hyacinth girls. Ugh, click with caution.

I am floored:

“A more basic point is made very robustly by Kathy Shaidle: Advanced western democracies have delivered the most prosperous societies in human history. There simply are no longer genuinely “poor” people in sufficient numbers. As Miss Shaidle points out, if you’re poor today, it’s almost always for behavioral reasons – behavior which the state chooses not to discourage but to reward. Nonetheless, progressive types persist in deluding themselves that there are vast masses of the “needy” out there that only the government can rescue.”

http://corner.nationalreview.com/post/?q=YzgyZWFiOTkxMTJiMTBlMGNkYTgyOTViZGIxNjQ0YjY=

Yes, Owlbear, and did you know that (Canadian) Kathy Shaidle lived on welfare (disability) benefits for four years because she suffers from lupus? Yes, the same Kathy Shaidle who despises the poor and subsidized health care, had this to say about her experience at a Family Benefits office in Toronto:

“I hated that office,” she writes. “And as ashamed as I am to admit it, most of all I hated the shabby, beaten-down clients…. When my interview was over, I hoped for a sudden deus ex machina, a lightning-flash vision that would reveal, through my tears, Christ in the faces of the frozen, unblinking clients I was leaving behind. But instead of God’s voice, the only sound was the scratchy bellow of another client’s name being mispronounced over the loudspeaker.”

Poor Kathy. But what’s a freshly showered good Catholic girl with lupus gonna do, rail at God for the lupus that drove her to the welfare office, as well as her plain appearance? (Yes, she’s bitter about that, too. If she had Coulter’s good looks she might get a teevee gig on Fox.) Blame the poor!

At least she had some shame about her hatreds then.

It seems Kathy’s self-hatred has evolved over time. In the 1980s she was part of the peace movement and marched with thousands of others to protest the arms race. Today she blames the poor for their misfortunes, admires George Bush, his glorious war, and the American free market health care system.

I’m guessing her need for welfare was the turning point in her self-loathing.

Of course, Kathy will never move to the USA because Canada’s health care system takes care of Kathy’s medical needs without Kathy having to spend much. If she’s like most Canadians, her health insurance (probably OHIP) costs between $35 and $75 a month – that is if you’re not on welfare or unemployed. Those folks don’t have to pay for health insurance.

The government insurer won’t reject her like some private outfit because she has lupus.

Your eligibility for Ontario health coverage is not determined by whether you have a job or are unemployed, or where you pay your income tax. It is based solely on your meeting one of the above citizenship or immigration categories and on you making your permanent and principal home in Ontario.

Yep, all you need be is a resident to receive coverage and how much you pay depends on whether you are employed or not. If you are employed (as most people are), it’s still a pittance. I know, I’m an employed Canadian and my insurance costs me $35.00 a month. With that I get a semi-private hospital room, as many doctors visits a year as I need, all surgery not deemed to be cosmetic, and 80% of my prescriptions covered plus a whole lot of other stuff.

Weird how she hates what she directly benefits from, eh?

I should add that Kathy has a huge crush on Mark Steyn and he’d reject her if she admired social welfare programs.

Here’s Kathy’s essay on applying for welfare benefits. Although she’s honest about her background and the grinding shame that accompanies poverty, her lack of self-awareness and compassion (for self) is profound.

Do something as simple as checking the “label” of the item to see where it’s made.

Excusez moi, cheri, but what ees zees “label” of which you speak? Must I wear ze trenchcoat like Alain Delon, so we can whisper in ze shadows about zees? I ‘ave not ‘eard of a “label”, you see, for in my poor country (vive la France, cheri) we only ‘as labels. And labia, of course, being far more sexee zan you un-‘appy Americans.

Au ‘voir, cheri, I must go and ‘ave a baguette and some champagne wiz my friends Pierre and Jacque and Eloise. Good luck wiz ze “label”-checking.

There simply are no longer genuinely “poor” people in sufficient numbers. As Miss Shaidle points out, if you’re poor today, it’s almost always for behavioral reasons – behavior which the state chooses not to discourage but to reward.

Owlbear, it’s quite simple: because of Teh Capitalism, there are no longer any losers, only winners! Hurrah! Ponies and blow jobs for everybody! All that blather about ‘survival of the fittest’ and ‘competition in a free market’ and all that, oh, okay, I know that’s part of the conservative prayer book, but really, what happens in the markets today is that there are winners, winningers, and winningest, and the only ones who suffer do so because they’re not following the rules.

So it’s all hunky dory, y’see?

You are for business, eh?

Well, I got yer business right here!

I am for winning the cold civil war. It’ll drive the Right nuts(ier).

I’m also for theremins. They are the soundtrack to the future.

I’m for business unless you own your own and can’t afford insurance. Then, get a REAL job, mofo. Maybe working for some foreign-owned company, I hear they’re doing pretty well.

Kirk, I am for you.

Business drives the economy alright.. Into to the ground that is

“In the last 10 years I have never seen such an explosion in Chinese products.”

they’re exploding now? is it the plastique paint?

they’re exploding now? is it the plastique paint?

I think it is of no small import to this great nation that THE CHINESE INVENTED EXPLODING STUFF!!!

I don’t like sex and drugs
I don’t like waterbugs
I don’t like Burker King
I don’t like anything

And I’m against it!

I am faw yeahs owd.