Scenes From A Malkin II: Electric Boogaloo

The past week has found the WingNet standing, as in a waking anxiety dream, in the middle of a gaping crowd wearing nothing but its tattered underoos.

But as Digby mentions, the more blatantly they reject sense and reason, the more meretriciously they seem to get away with it. Ol’ Malkin shows how it’s done in this long-overdue apology and correction from Saturday.

michellemalkinphotox9.jpg
Above: “I’m sorry you feel that way.”

Shorter Michelle Malkin: “I was minding my own business when…”

Corrections
By Michelle Malkin

On December 26 and December 27, I linked to a photo publicized by radio talker Scott Hennen and Power Line of Sen. John Kerry in Iraq. Milblogger Ben of Mesopotamia, an Army Captain in Iraq, had posted the photo and recounted on Dec. 18:

On Saturday night, a colleague emailed me and told me to bring my camera, as Senator Kerry was scheduled to give a press conference here in the Palace. At 2100, he entered a conference room wearing his leather flight jacket. Unfortunately, there was no media there, except for the enlisted soldiers from AFTN (Armed Forces Television Network) who had to be there. His aide looked around, saw that this just wasn’t happening, and quickly escorted Kerry out before I could take a picture.

Finally, the next morning, Senator Kerry ate chow at the Dining Facility. Normally when a Senator/Representative visits, he is joined by a contingent of soldiers/Marines/airmen from his home state. Despite the fact that the MP unit responsible for Green Zone security is an Army Reserve unit from Massachusetts, not a single soldier went to sit with him. (By contrast, Bill O’Reilly, host of that terrible shoutfest on Fox, had over 400 soldiers waiting in line to meet him on Saturday).

Shorter Michelle Malkin: “Then, as I was dancing in sparkling light wearing my tiara, TPM Muckraker flung itself into an unhinged tantrum of fact-checking.”

After TPM Muckraker wrongly accused milbloggers and conservative bloggers of faking the photo, TPM Cafe’s Greg Sargent published a heavy-breathing investigative report on the context of the photo:

…it turns out that Kerry was at that table to conduct an off-the-record breakfast discussion with two reporters, so there would have been no reason whatsover for troops to be sitting with them. In fact, Kerry and the reporters even sought out empty seats, I’m told.

The two reporters who met with Kerry that morning are Marc Santora of The New York Times and Mark Danner of The New York Review, The New Yorker and other publications. Both Santora and Danner confimed to me that they met with Kerry — on the morning of Dec. 17, according to Kerry’s office and to Danner. (The person who posted the photo also confirmed that it was taken that morning.)

Danner confirmed to me that he’s the guy with his back to the camera, saying his jacket and the back of his head looked the same as in the photo. He added that his position in relation to Kerry was the same as the photo showed. And here’s what Danner had to say to me about the empty seats: “If there were empty seats it’s because we sought them out. We wanted an empty table so we could talk. It’s that simple.”

Shorter Michelle Malkin: “But I believe the real blame in this matter rests with John Kerry.”

In this particular instance, it appears, Kerry was not spurned by the troops. I stand corrected and apologize for the error.

I do not apologize, however, for linking to milblogger Ben’s first-hand account of Kerry’s visit or for printing letters I received offering other accounts of Kerry’s visit like this one:

My brother is an Air Force Col. serving on Gen. Casey’s staff in Baghdad. I emailed him yesterday to ask if he had seen the picture of “Mr. Lonely.” He had seen the pix and the following is what he wrote back: “The picture on the website of the Senator is from the same chow hall I use. We call it the DEFAC (Dining facility). The night prior I was in the chow hall with the Senator, he came in just behind me and sat a few tables over. Everybody avoided him like the plague.”

These accounts from the unedukated troops in Irak may explain why Kerry was huddling in a safe, off-the-record cocoon with New York journalists in a Baghdad mess hall in the first place.

Shorter Dan Riehl: “Ooh, it’s even worse than we thought: If the troops wanted to have breakfast with Kerry, then he decided to sit alone.”

Dan Riehl reacts to the TPM Cafe report:

The Distinguished Gentleman from Massachusetts traveled halfway around the world on tax dollars, allegedly to support the troops he ticked off with a poorly crafted joke – and rather than spend just a little bit more time with them, he opted to have breakfast with reporters from the New York Times and The New York Review, instead.

Shorter Bryan Preston: “Let this be a lesson to our ‘friends’ on the left, who invent silly conspiracy theories while we on the right debunk them.”

Shorter Ed Morrissey: “Um, sorry about the Kerry thing. Boy is my face red. But it’s not like 300,000 right-blog readers can actually influence real-life events or anything, which is why it’s, uh, not our fault if Jamil Hussein is, you know, tortured or killed because of…um, the Associated Press, which has a lot of explaining to do as far as I’m concerned.”

Bryan Preston responds. Ed Morrissey responds.

Shorter Scott Johnson: “Say, here’s some more unsubstantiated conjecture, courtesy of an anonymous emailer. But journalism isn’t all work and no play: Prepare to smile as I indulge in a humorous aside!”

Scott Johnson responds:

Our emailer comments that Senator Kerry’s off-the-record breakfast meeting on December 17 may have taken place “because no one showed up at [Senator Kerry’s] press conference the night before.” I add only that, despite his being a serial defamer of the American military in the course of a long public career, Senator Kerry is actually admired, popular and sought-out by the troops, just like Bill O’Reilly!

Shorter Little Green Footballs: Blargh! Let nuclear death be the Final Solution to the International Jewish Muslim Conspiracy! Oh, say, this episode ought to be a lesson to the mad conspiracy-mongers on the left. My stars, what a bunch of mad conspiracy-mongers. Shriek! Gibber-gibber! Nuke Mecca, assassinate Pelosi!

Little Green Footballs corrects:

Consider this a correction, and a note that it now appears the original report was inaccurate; if Sargent is correct, Kerry was talking to some reporters and deliberately sought out an empty spot. We’ll just agree to forget about the numerous weird theories thrown out by the left-wing blogs on the way to this proof.

Now, if only TPM and the fevered left-wing blogosphere would hold, say, the New York Times–has anyone seen a correction yet for the Carmen Climaco debacle?–as accountable for its errors as the rest of us.

Shorter Michelle Malkin: “…And as I stand here absolved, I hereby pledge that I will devote my life to finding the real perpetrator.”

***

I relayed information from multiple sources–CPATT, Centcom, and two other military sources on the ground in Iraq– that the Associated Press’s disputed source, Jamil Hussein, could not be found. As I noted on the 4th, the AP reported that the Ministry of Interior in Iraq has now said a Captain Jamil Hussein does work in the al Khadra police station. I regret the error. But no blogger should apologize for raising legitimate questions about AP’s transparency, its reliance on local foreign stringers of dubious origins, and information that sources such as Hussein have provided the AP. I will continue to pursue some of the unresolved issues related to this.

 

Comments: 29

 
 
 

Malkin & Co. in sum: Our sources are propaganda outlets, and we are too.

[Gavin, I think Shorter LGF might need to be pulled out of the blockquote box.]

 
 

If the malkin thing wants to be some kind of honest analyst of media accuracy and honesty, as opposed to a political hack with a specific ax to grind, well, that would be honorable. But she’ll have to begin to care about Europe, Africa (I hear some shit’s afoot in Somalia these days), asia and maybe even Russia and it’s former sattelites. But as long as she is only braying about the coverage in Iraq and Lebanon, and only in ways that it seems to diverge from her tightly held beliefs, she cannot hope to have any credibiltity outside of Right Blogistan, which, as we so well know, is not refered to as the “Echo Chamber” for nothing…

mikey

 
 

Oopss. I’m not Jeff anymore. Sorry…

mikey

 
Smiling Mortician
 

Bah. My outrage overload has slipped into the red zone and now I’m just exhausted. What with Ann Althouse showing up all agog over in the other thread and The Malkin adding layer after wafer-thin layer of shit to her Peelable Onion of Vicious Denial, well, hell, I’m running out of time to sputter in response.

But I’m intrigued by the notion of the Unhinged Tantrum of Fact-Checking. I might be able to find some time for that.

 
 

“But I’m intrigued by the notion of the Unhinged Tantrum of Fact-Checking. I might be able to find some time for that. ”

I have a mental picture of an unhinged Smiling Mortician, his hair all in disarray, in a Frankenstein type lab wearing a white coat and muttering to himself as he maniacally checks the facts…..

I love this blog.

 
 

Recipe for Wing Net: One part Homer Simpson, two parts Holy Grail’s Black Knight, one large dodo egg, dash of paprika and salt to taste.
Cook at 375 degrees on middle rack until half-done.
Serve.

 
 

My domestic dictatorship is being overthrown by my son, who is ousting me to play World of Warcraft on my much speedier computer.

I am much too much the doting parent.

 
 

You may not have noticed, but I am trying to pick a blogfight with you because traffic just fell off from my last one.

 
 

Electric Boogaloo is one of the best movies ever.

 
 

Nothing that hiding the RAM sticks can’t fix, Candy.

 
 

has anyone seen a correction yet for the Carmen Climaco debacle?

Without conceding to the use of the word “debacle,” yes.

 
 

If I actually thought that was teh REAL Ann Althouse, Id probably go all ad hominem on her ass, drop a few “bitchez” and drop a few C-bpmbs. And, of course, call her “Ann Outhouse.” Just to kick teh bee hive, don’tchaknow.

 
 

Yeah, you’d show her, Marq. I’m sure she’d cry.

 
 

Man. If I was a lawyer, and the case for my client hinged on only the most irrational, stubborn interpretation of the evidence … my dream jury would be:

Michelle Malkin
Scott Hennen
Ben of Mesopotamia
Ben of Mesopotamia’s brother
Dan Riehl
Bryan Preston
Ed Morrissey
Scott Johnson
Charles Johnson
Any three regular readers of the above bloggers

 
 

Arrrgh. It’s a mobius strip of wingnuttery.

 
 

Arrrgh. It’s a mobius strip of wingnuttery.

One of the most chilling scenes I ever saw on film was in Microcosmos when a group of caterpillars predisposed to latching on to the butt of the one in front formed a circle, and it was obvious that they’d die like that, brown-nosing around a little patch of dirt until they starved or were eaten by some lucky and hungry bird.

 
 

If the case for your client hinged on the most irrational stubborn, interpretation of the evidence, you’d want George W. Bush as your jury foreman.

 
 

Gee whiz, I did a mikey and stuck with the Althouse up there.

 
 

One of the most chilling scenes I ever saw on film was in Microcosmos when a group of caterpillars predisposed to latching on to the butt of the one in front formed a circle, and it was obvious that they’d die like that, brown-nosing around a little patch of dirt until they starved or were eaten by some lucky and hungry bird.

Put that clip on a loop and run The Benny Hill Music “Yakety Sax” in the background and you have the perfect audio/visual metaphor for Right Blogistan.

 
 

Gee whiz, I did a mikey and stuck with the Althouse up there.

That was unintentional? Because that slayed me.

 
 

Or slew, to be meticulous.

 
 

That was unintentional? Because that slayed me.

Yes, I’m as pretentious and vacuous as Althouse.

 
 

What got me sniggering was the thought of her chilled by the lot of the clueless brown-nosing caterpillars working endlessly over the same patch of ground but never seeing any similarity to herself, which is what I thought was your implication.

 
 

I dare say, does anyone have a photo of Malkin sitting at a mess table by herself in Iraq?

 
 

which is what I thought was your implication.

Oh, I can totally see it. Really. But the sad fact is that I actually found that scene horrifying and meant to refer to it in relation to the non-Althouse echo-chamber…Oh look: tea cozies!

 
 

No, it does sound horrifying, and I think we can all take a lesson from it. But it I still found it terribly funny posted under the name, as if she were to post she finds Altmouse unbearably banal.

OMG you tea cozy tempter… Wait, what? “All of our tea cozies are unavailable at this time.” You bastard! AIIIIIEEEEE!

 
 

The Malkin adding layer after wafer-thin layer of shit to her Peelable Onion of Vicious Denial

That was worth the price of admission, right there.

 
 

Who is this Ann Althouse person anyway?

 
 

“But no blogger should apologize for raising legitimate questions about AP’s transparency, its reliance on local foreign stringers of dubious origins”

Foreign stringers? I’m sorry, but exactly who’s the “foreign” correspondent in Baghdad, here? Maybe she’s referring to Iraqi journalists? The ones who a) tend to, but not always, come back alive? b) who tend to, but not always, avoid attracting attention to their sources, so that said sources don’t end up in a garbage dump full of holes the next morning?

Fuck you, Michele. Take off the flak jacket, wear bright-colored clothing and don’t cover your hair. Drive yourself across to the west side of the Tigris and do some “Salafist-in-the-street’ interviews. We’ll wait.

 
 

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