This year belongs to the Blue Jays!

And by belongs I mean they may have their first over .500 season in three years.

They are, of course, screwed by being stuck in the same division as the Yankees and the Red Sox, the latter having already squandered all my good will to the point where I hate them as much as the former.

They are, of course, screwed by being stuck in the same division as the Yankees and the Red Sox, the latter having already squandered all my good will to the point where I hate them as much as the former.

I’m honestly all in favor of instituting a salary cap, even though it would hurt the Red Sox. The NFL system- where every team has a shot at competing every three or four years (unless they’re run ineptly like the Detroit Lions)- is vastly superior.

Must be something in being a ‘moderate’ which makes one without conviction.

Christ, man, get some. And, honestly, being a Sox fan in the big city isn’t especially difficult, nor particularly brave. Hell, after ’04, I barely zipped my pants for a month walking to and from the subway (the B cap securely resting on my head) and I’ve been known to strike matches on New Yorkers’ jaws to light cigarettes I didn’t smoke — and they didn’t do much about it. Even the year before I took the abuse and laughed — Aaron Boone? You think this is the worst I’ve ever felt? Hah! I remember Buckner. I was 8 when Bucky Fucking Dent ruined my childhood. What could you possibly say to me that can hurt me?

I do have to say, though, in Josh’s defense, I appreciate that he didn’t jump on the Nation bandwagon just because it went Hollywood. If I ever meet Jimmy Fallon, though. There’ll be words.

Enjoy watching Wily Mo strike out 175 times this season.

I type that, as I sit here, in my Mattingly jersey, worn to mark the solemn occasion that is opening day.

The Yankees are a bunch of over-the-hill washed-up players making +200 million dollars this year. Sadly, yes. They have abandoned the team style and concept championed by Buck Showalter and Gene Michael and have reverted to the free-spending, halcyon days of the 80s and Stump Merrill. Unfortunately, I’m unable to not root for them, having pin-striped blood and all. I even watched Pride of the Yankees last night.

Tbogg has an excellent baseball post up, as well.

Here’s to ya Brad, may your Sox finish second.

Yeah with Pedro, there is always the chance of a dwarf being in the locker room. Man I miss that guy…

The Yankees are a bunch of over-the-hill washed-up players making +200 million dollars this year. Sadly, yes. They have abandoned the team style and concept championed by Buck Showalter and Gene Michael and have reverted to the free-spending, halcyon days of the 80s and Stump Merrill.

Also, Giambi and Sheffield still use steroids. I’m sorry, but it’s true.

I was worried that the Theo Epstein soap opera was going to have negative aftereffects on the Sox this season. Brad, can you tell me fo shizzle that there is nothing about that whole mess that’s going to keep the Sox from being a contender this year?

Of course, living now in Chicago, I have a vested interest in the Cubs going all the way, so that I can say that all three of “my” teams have broken their long-ass losing streaks… but since my wife hates the Cubs more than I hate the Yankees, I can’t actually voice that view around the house. And anyway, deep down it has to be the Right Sox all the way.

I’m sick of Sox fans complaining about the Yankees payroll. Granted it’s a lot more, but as a Twins fan, I drool at the thought of the team Terry Ryan could put together with $125 million.

Man I miss that guy…

In his prime, he was the great pitcher ever to wear a Sox uniform. And yes, that includes Roger “I’m Still Dominant at 42 But I Swear I’m Not on the Juice” Clemens. His ERA+ in 2000 was a ridiculous 285, and his career ERA+ stands at 166- 22 points higher than the second-place holder, Lefty Grove.

I was worried that the Theo Epstein soap opera was going to have negative aftereffects on the Sox this season. Brad, can you tell me fo shizzle that there is nothing about that whole mess that’s going to keep the Sox from being a contender this year?

There are a lot of question marks, particularly about Foulke. But if he falls down, you can put Papelbon in as closer and call up Hansen to set up. Seems like a good option to me.

Now ChrisS — “Solemn occasion”. That’s Yankee all over ain’t it? It’s a duty. An obligation. A contractual codicil that the season starts and the Yankees must be triumphant, so Opening Day becomes an exercise with all the fun and mystery of the opening bell at the NYSE.

Enjoy the Mary in Center Field. Jeter’s going to have to run out 300 feet for the five-hop relays from Death Valley.

Brad — the NFL salary cap only seems like it breeds competition. Statistically, the percentage of different teams who’ve won championships and been competitive in the leagues have been practically the same in the NFL and MLB, relative to their payrolls.

It has as much to do with smart management, if not more, than it does with just cash.

Also, Giambi and Sheffield still use steroids. I’m sorry, but it’s true.

Sadly, no. They take Flintsone multi-vitamins.

And just to be pedantic (while correcting myself), I’m fact-checking Brad’s ass:

Although 2006 payroll numbers are not yet official, the Yankees again will easily be No. 1 in the majors with an estimated roster totaling about $190 million. Boston is second in baseball with a projected payroll nearing $135 million. … [who, “may not be championship caliber right now”]

190 x 10^6 is less than 200 x 10^6

Meh, I’m just pissed I have to wait until 10pm to watch Randy Johnson’s knees explode in a flurry of bone, tendons, muscle, and Big League Chew.

The NFL system- where every team has a shot at competing every three or four years (unless they’re run ineptly like the Detroit Lions)- is vastly superior.

Brad, I’m relatively confident that the major difference between the perceived competitiveness in MLB and the NFL derives from the number of playoff spots more so than any other factor. In MLB, 8 teams out of 30 make the playoffs, and in the NFL, it’s 12 out of 32. You’d see a lot more weirdness in MLB with a few more playoff teams. Not that I want that…

Brad — the NFL salary cap only seems like it breeds competition. Statistically, the percentage of different teams who’ve won championships and been competitive in the leagues have been practically the same in the NFL and MLB, relative to their payrolls.

That’s only because Bellechick and Pioli are (were?) fucking geniuses. Also, like you said, you have teams that are just really, really stupid (the Jets, the Bills, the Lions, the Browns, etc.). But you also have teams like Cincinatti who can invest their resources wisely and become a legit contender. What’s more, they can sign their star quarterback to a long-term deal, something that the Kansas City Royals could never have done with Beltran or Damon.

Chris- it’ll get over $200 million by the time they trade Robbie Cano for Chan Ho Park in July.

Enjoy the Mary in Center Field. Jeter’s going to have to run out 300 feet for the five-hop relays from Death Valley.

Sadly, yes. I thought that if the Sox signed him at 4/$40 they would be crippled with an aging singles-hitter with no defense. Then the Yankees exceeded my wildest dreams and, instead of letting him rot in beantown, signed him for more money.

That’s Yankee all over ain’t it? It’s a duty. An obligation.

Excuse me, I have to put on the vestments.

Chris- it’ll get over $200 million by the time they trade Robbie Cano for Chan Ho Park in July.

Not so loudly, please; Steinbrenner has very sensitive hearing. Besides, I hear Kevin Brown is making a comeback.

We respect the game and the lore. We’re like the Catholic Church. No names on the back of the jerseys, no disco demolition nights, no “idiots”.

Ah. So that must be why you have two known juicers playing first and right field. It must also be why A-Rod childishly slapped the ball out of Arroyo’s glove in the ALCS.

Jeter and Rivera are class acts, though.

(Sorry to pick on you, Chris, it’s nothing personal. But Yankees fans make me get all tribalist.)

Must be something in being a ‘moderate’ which makes one without conviction.

Puh- it ain’t the moderate, it’s the lack of humor. I’m pretty moderate, and am a diehard Cubs fan.
And if you don’t think that’s alright- I’ll fight you… you heard me; I’ve done it before.

It’s funny to see you guys argue who’s going to vie for the fake baseball pennant this year. Lose the DH, AL fans, and you can be part of the conversation again. My (biased) prediction: Giants win the West with a .500 record. Go on to lose Series in 7 to Minnesota. Barry plays 100 games, hits 35 homers, is hated by everybody but San Franciscans.

ChrisS,

True that. Nice post and good luck.

Gus,

Granted it’s a lot more, but as a Twins fan, I drool at the thought of the team Terry Ryan could put together with $125 million.

Yeah, maybe they’d be able to get Ortiz back instead of releasing him for nothing after ruining his swing for four years.

Brad,

What the A’s have done over the past 8 years or so is the Patriots approach — and they’ve been very successful with it (without the championships) — plugging in the right people at the right time and getting rid of higher priced talents. Or take the Marlins — they let their high price talent walk, get younger, suck for five years, their talent matures and they win another Series.

The Royals, taking a completely ignorant approach, eschew both the Oakland model AND they let high price talent walk without having developed new talent. They are the Arizona Cardinals of major league baseball. No salary cap is going to help them.

What the A’s have done over the past 8 years or so is the Patriots approach — and they’ve been very successful with it (without the championships) — plugging in the right people at the right time and getting rid of higher priced talents.

Very true. Although I think the Patriots are about to see it come crashing down on them. There’s a fine line between “thrift” and “cheap.” The Patriots finally crossed it this offseason.

Go on to lose Series in 7 to Minnesota.

Two words: Cleve. Land.

Yes, my prediction of 162-0 turned out not so right. But no contract issues (Grady’s Ladies are just delighted!), Westbrook finally winning 20 … Cococobagz wishing he’d stayed with a winner … ahhh, it’s good to have baseball again.

As a born-and-bred New Yorker who lives in Boston, I have to weigh in, even though I am clearly not the baseball fan everyone else on this thread is.

The Red Sox – Yankees rivalry is extremely funny to me because it really is only half a rivalry. In any group of 3+ Bostonians, there is at least a 50% chance of a spontaneous “Yankees Suck” being generated. Our citywide economy is largely dependent on the “t-shirts with sexually suggestive invectives against specific Yankees” sector.

Is their any reflection of this in New York? I feel like the average Yankee fan is as concerned about this feud as my dog is concerned with the fly that just alit on his left testicle. This is because my dog’s testicles were surgically removed several years ago.

That’s why I loved the purchase of Cap’t Caveman. I can imagine the anthropomorphized collective of Yankees fans saying, So, this Damon guy…he was a sentimental favorite of yours? Huh. We just bought him ’cause he was funny in that Dunkin’ Donuts commercial.

(Sorry to pick on you, Chris, it’s nothing personal. But Yankees fans make me get all tribalist.)
No worries, Brad. Most of my posts are tongue-in-cheek anyway, I know the Yankees have their negatives. For gawd’s sake we had a functional alcoholic play center for the 50s and 60s.

I’ve even used to Sox fans to define a worthy rival: I was in Seattle at the end of a weekend sweep by the Yanks. Two Yankee fans, myself not being one one of them, were pushing brooms down the concourse chanting, “sweep, sweep, sweep”. Total class. The larger point being, that if they tried that shit in Fenway they’d get hit with a tire iron. The Mariner fans were indifferent.

Besides, Sox fans are fun to get riled up, that persecution complex was getting pretty hefty, almost to rightwing proportions. I can’t imagine what it would be like if they lost that series. Watching the twit-in-chief, Bill Simmons, suffer almost makes me understand sadists.

Ah, Noo Yawkers. Their Governor is a Republican, their state is usually on the losing side in Presidential Elections. Their pro football teams are collectively mediocre, and their highly-paid basketball team is Beyond Bad. At least they can take solace in having the Best MLB Runner-Up Money Can Buy, and if we don’t win it this year, by G., we’ll go out and procure the best player on another team and win it next year! And keep that failed manager in place, BTW. Please? Oh, incidentally, thanks for the gratuitous insult of the Lions, who so desperately deserve it.

The Red Sox – Yankees rivalry is extremely funny to me because it really is only half a rivalry..

Uh, right. Funny how I haven’t heard much about 1918 recently. As a New Englander who lives in New York, I can assue you the rivalry goes both ways.

Is their any reflection of this in New York?

Yes. It’s whythey got Damon. While the Sox have developed a global fan base and bars across the country show their games (including a few here in Manhattan), the Yanks have gone back to what got them where they are — buying Sox players in an effort to turn the tables again.

As a born-and-bred New Yorker who lives in Boston, I have to weigh in, even though I am clearly not the baseball fan everyone else on this thread is.

Uninformed yet opinionated? You bet he’s a Yankee fan.

Lose the DH, AL fans Right, because baseball is SO MUCH BETTER when the pitcher gets one free out every 9 hitters. See this haunch? You may begin biting. I would also like to point out that the Yanquis inhale mightily.<rowr! ffft! teehee hee!/>

Close tag, not empty tag! Dangit!

Oh, incidentally, thanks for the gratuitous insult of the Lions, who so desperately deserve it.

One of the greatest running backs of all-time (who could have eclipsed even the legendary Walter Payton if he’d played for a few more years… still wouldn’t have been as good as Jim Brown though) retired because he was sick of playing for morons. That’s about as bad as it gets.

Not all SF’ers love Barry Bonds, rest assured. Some even prefer the ‘lesser’ Bay Area team. Just wish it would stop raining…

Some even prefer the ‘lesser’ Bay Area team.

I don’t get it. Oakland supports its football team more rabidly than any team besides Pittsburgh or Philly. The Raiders get more support than even the Niners, who are historically one of the greatest teams ever. But they can’t work up an ounce of enthusiasm for a ballclub that has defied expectations to win year in and year out? WTF?

Or, when viewed from another angle . . . perhaps the National League would like to consider joining pretty much every other level of organized baseball in the known universe and drop the sad spectacle of forcing pitchers to ground out weakly to the mound every two or three innings.

You can make your excuses for the DH, tigrismus … whatever. But for AL fans to ever call themselves “traditionalists” is to teh laff. Anyway, it’s a chicken-and-egg thing … if pitchers knew they absolutely would have to hit in the majors, they would work more on their hitting. As it is, the DH rule despoils pitchers’ hitting in the NL as well.

I have absolutely no statistical evidence or even anecdotal evidence to back that statement up.

I second ChrisS’s (could you pick a tougher screen name to possessivize?) characterization of Bill Simmons as twit-in-chief of Red Sox Nation. I third Gus’s (moderately less clunky to construct the possessive) bemusement at Red Sox fans bitching about the Yankees’ payroll. Cry us small- and mid-market fans a freaking river.

Also, this thread is surely a micro-harbinger of the baseball season ahead of us … incessant navel-gazing by the national media on the Yankees-Sox rivalry with occasional perfunctory nods to the many other interesting stories happening in other big league towns.

Does baseball turn me into Joe Scarborough? Sadly, yes.

Mobius – the rain. The rain. The rain. It never stops. The first two games of my son’s micro soccer season have been rained out. It is the big suck.

I know one guy from the city who’s an A’s fan. He is tolerated but kept at a distance. I have seen some wishy-washy confused people who claim to like both teams equally – they’re the ones in thos stupid half-hats split down the middle at the Bay Bridge Series … but they are not tolerated and frequently have their unattended pints ‘disappeared’.

Oh, and the Raiders don’t get more support than the Niners. The Raiders had like half their home games blacked out last season. The Niners, as truly wretched as they have been in the downward spiral that is the York ownership, have not had a game blacked out since O.J. was playing.

The first two games of my son’s micro soccer season have been rained out. It is the big suck.

YOU’RE A DADDY??!!! Now I’m really frightened…

Also, this thread is surely a micro-harbinger of the baseball season ahead of us … incessant navel-gazing by the national media on the Yankees-Sox rivalry with occasional perfunctory nods to the many other interesting stories happening in other big league towns.

I’m so on the Selig-less Brewers’ bandwagon this season.

could you pick a tougher screen name to possessivize?

I can only go by what my moms named me.

Yeah … I’m also the coach. Many are frightened, few are impressed.

Harrumph. Harrumph, I say! It won’t be traditional until they’re making the balls in Natick again.

Did I mention: harrumph?</cranky oldtimer impersonation>

ChrisS – I’m glad someone else pointed out the “uber-sleeper” that the Brewers are this year.

Fielder, Hardy and Weeks are the next big infield combo, provided they remain healthy. With improved pitching and more timely hitting, they’ll break .500 and compete for the wild card.

A lot to ask from this ballclub, to say the least, but what other time of the year can I be hopelessly optimistic!

At least none of you had to stay up until 2 a.m. to watch your (politically incorrect) team lose the season opener.

The Dead Ball Era. It had it all: weakly hit balls, more complete game shutouts than you could shake a stick at, rampant alcoholism, overt racism.

Okay, so I’m not that much of a traditionalist.

damn, I wish I had gotten here earlier and not missed the Yankee bashing thread.

Can I use this space to bitch about ESPN? They are supposed to be showing the Mets game, but instead it’s ESPN news on that channel. The Mets channel isn’t even on this cable system (Charter.) Last year they showed all the games as scheduled.

spencer – in Japan they have the same system, with one DH league and one real league. Also, in little league, Babe Ruth, American Legion, High School, etc. (all organized) pitchers hit.

I was at the bar last week and was schocked to hear people arguing for the DH. Hitting isn’t everything, and I would much rather see a 2-1 game that is over in 3 hours than a 4+ hour 10-7 game between the Royals and Devil Rays.

I guess it’s a matter of personal preference, but I just don’t get the appeal of games like that.

Plus, when I was a kid the rule was if you don’t play the field, you don’t get to hit.

Oh, and Mets pitchers are batting 1.000 this year so far! (and the Nats pitcher is 1-2)

J. Brida,
touché on Ortiz (though I don’t think he had a healthy season with the Twins), but I’ll take 3 consecutive playoff appearances with the Twins’ payroll. I’d like to see Theo do that with $55 mil.

F the Yankees! Go Cardinals.

Theyre already starting off the season great, its 5-0, Pujols is up with the sacks packed!

Man, listen to y’all! What a bunch of whiners! As a Washington Nationals fan, I echo Gus’ comment: if you’re Goliath’s younger brother, it’s hard to complain about Goliath. Some of us don’t even have an owner, much less hundreds of millions of dollars to t’ro around. Congrats, Sawx fans, you’ve won: now you find out that you’re as obnoxious as your hated rivals! Not only that, but you used their blueprint, about which you complained so bitterly for so long, to do it! Bwah ha ha! You have turned to the Dark Side!

/shadenfreude

Also, yes, there needs to be a salary cap, revenue sharing, etc. etc. that would make it more like the socialist NFL. Hey, it may be anti-capitalist, but it works, and it gives the rest of us hope that any given year can be “our” year – not so with baseball.

hahah Cardinals are totally killing the Phucktard Phillies. I bet digamma’s crying. It’s a beautiful day.

Sox fans are nowhere near as obnoxious as their hated rivals.

Honestly, even the worst wingnuts are not as bad as some Yankee fans.

And what was that blueprint anyway? The Yankees won by getting lucky that their owner was banned from baesball operations, so that people who actually had a plan could draft and develop players like Jeter, Rivera, Pettite, and Williams, and make some smart free agent acquisitions.

The Sox built their championship team around a core of a hitters, and finally got over the top by making a big trade and signing a big closer.

(I didn’t see the Sox benefiting from 7 years of every questionable umpiring call going in their favor, either.)

But ever since the Yanks’ payroll went all out of proportion (2001) they haven’t won.

And this year will be no different.

Ben,

/shadenfreude

That only works when you enjoy our suffering. The Sox recently won a World Championship — maybe you heard about it. Not a hell of a lot of suffering goin’ on here, save for a gripe here or there.

By the way, Brad simply and accurately recorded the Bomber’s payroll — I have yet to see anywhere on this thread any Sox fan bitching about Steinbrenner’s payroll. If they do in your presence, feel free to slap them.

Of course, you might also point out that the combined the payrolls of the last two World Championship teams doesn’t even match that of last year’s Yankee team.

(I didn’t see the Sox benefiting from 7 years of every questionable umpiring call going in their favor, either.)

Crymorenoob.

incessant navel-gazing by the national media on the Yankees-Sox rivalry with occasional perfunctory nods to the many other interesting stories happening in other big league towns.

Exhibit 1A, courtesy of the lazy writers at ESPN.com

The sense of entitlement of New York baseball fans is roughly equivalent in egregiousness to the worst sorts of Nazi child-molestors. Mets and Yankees fans are insufferable.

But nothing, *nothing* is worse than the mass pathology exhibited by the clueless, yuppiefied, fuckface, masochistic fans of the Chicago Cubs.

I was soo glad the Sox won last year; first for the sake of parity, second because it will inspire something Cubs fans havent suffered in a long time, jealousy of the other hometown team.

Perhaps I’m being slightly hyperbolic, but is it too much to hope that Cubs fans die and burn in hell? Idiots. Karma’s been telling them for almost a hundred years TO PICK ANOTHER FUCKING TEAM. But they dont listen. They *like* to suffer.

Sadly, No!

“Some” Red Sox fans are indeed as annoying as “some” Yankees fans, as long as we’re being selective. Hey, on another thread a Sox fan himself admitted as much (although I believe the comparison was between Red Sox Nation and some other obnoxious group).

Look, both groups are big enoug to have “good” and “bad” fans. I don’t believe that one is naturally more obnoxious than the other, but I do see a blatant hypocrisy when Red Sox fans complain about Yankees fans or the way they run their club.

How can you point out what the Yankees have done right w/o giving credit by saying they “got lucky”? It doesn’t matter who made the decisions, they made good ones. The Sox “made a big trade,” exactly the kind of thing they always complain about the Yankees doing. Fact is, only one club has as much money as the Sox, so it’s not like just because Boston does it, it’s somehow different than when New York does. Yes, I know there’s a big disparity, but it’s not as big as the disparity between the two of them and the rest of the league. That’s out of proportion.

“Every questionable call”? C’mon, every good team has that accusation, from UCLA (not that I like them at all) to Duke (I despise them) to the New England Patriots. There is no conspiracy.

Ben- you won’t hear me bitching about the Yankees’ payroll. Even so, I think a salary cap is in order, even though it would hurt the Sox too.

Fact is, only one club has as much money as the Sox,

Not exactly true! The Sox are second in payroll, yes (a mere 60 million or so less than number one), but come on. The Dodgers easily have the resources the Sox do. So do the Mets. The only reason the Phillies don’t is that they just don’t give a shit about their fans and don’t spend it. The Cubbies? More money than God. The Tigers could match payroll if they were so inclined, which they’re not. Texas, yep. Angles have been throwing around money.

I mean what makes a big market? Boston sells out every season and they have a passionate fan base — but they’re only the sixth largest media market. And they’ve only recently really opened up the pursestrings.

Mo Vaughn was right about a decade ago when the Yawkey trust still controlled the team and they were shortballing him, crying poverty. Vaughn said that they have money that’s older than dirt, they just ain’t spending it.

There are plenty of teams you can say that about these days.

Also, yes, there needs to be a salary cap, revenue sharing, etc. etc. that would make it more like the socialist NFL. Hey, it may be anti-capitalist, but it works, and it gives the rest of us hope that any given year can be “our” year – not so with baseball.

I have long been the main proponent* of limited trial periods for professional sports team owners. So they get maybe 3 to 5 years to get to the playoffs. If they fail, they are forced to sell the team to the highest bidder.

*Read: Blathered at uninterested people in bars

I have yet to see anywhere on this thread any Sox fan bitching about Steinbrenner’s payroll.

The post mentions it, but it’s hardly new for Red Sox Nation. The “evil empire” quote for example. I still like the Sox because of Big Papi, but Republican Schilling is starting to annoy me.

hahahahahaha they just introduced Bonds at Petco and even the apathetic Pads fans were booing to bring down the house … I love it … prediction: 2 dongs … GO GIANTS!

lesser in quotes because of the SF tendancy to look down on Oakland. (been on both sides out here.) Me, I’ll watch the Giants, but prefer the A’s. Niners are so bad it’s not worth it, and how can any Oaklander bear to watch the Raiders after Al (go to hell) Davis screwed around with our hearts. And the stadium.

And for the A’s there is a quite dedicated core out there. Just look.

Honestly, I always disliked the Yankees, and now I hate them even more. It turns out that my Alma Mater used to own the entirety of Yankee Stadium until 1971, when the City of New York decided to acquire the building by ‘condemning’ it and then reimbursing my university a paltry 2.5 million dollars. (It was worth at least 4.5 million when it was donated in 1962 by an Alum.) Oddly enough, the school is Rice University, located in Houston, of all places.

“I’m still your daddy, los cobages!”

I believe the more commonly used term is “bolco,” from bolsa de colostomía. And for emphasis, bolco de mierda, which is, of course, repetitive.

On Oakland v. San Francisco. The ballpark doesn’t help. Candlestick Park had character and AT&T/PacBell Park is a nice stadium. The Oakland Alameda County Coliseum is not made for baseball. That said, the general admission bleachers back in the day were much better than the Stick’s.

As my favorite Red Soxk is now a Red, I guess there’s no Cornroyo crowing tonight.

But Boomer Wells has a posse.

Year Two Thou-sand! (Clap clap clap-clap clap!)

Hey, watch out for the Devil Rays, we’ve got Carl Crawford and Aubrey Huff and, and…

Oh, never mind.

Bah. Giants lose opener. UCLA killed in NCAA final. But … DeLay gives up the ghost! Ultimately, not a bad day.

hahah Cardinals are totally killing the Phucktard Phillies. I bet digamma’s crying. It’s a beautiful day.

Nonetheless, I was there and you weren’t. And I got my picture taken with Chuck Pennacchio, who’s going to beat Rick Santorum in November. Which means I spent the day being both a better Cardinals fan AND a better Democrat than you.

Oh, and and Jimmy’s hitting streak is at 37.

Fitting that East Bay product Jimmy Rollins should be chasing East Bay and SF product Joe DiMaggio’s record hitting streak.

The batter swings — a mighty crack!
Displayed to all — alas, alack!
The umpire sneers, “Ye reprobate,
crack’s illegal in this state!”
Abashed, the platesman grabs his crotch,
and makes adjustments on the box,
he shifts his weight and kicks his heel,
and hope’s he’s clothed what was revealed,
the pitcher leans and spits a wad
the catcher lifts his eyes to God,
the vendors shriek and wave their wares,
“Hot dogs! Cold beer!”
they howl like bears,
And in the stands, the fans’ array,
they smoke, they bleat,
they honk, they bray,
Peanuts they buy, and crackerjack,
and I don’t care if they never come back,
O blissful diamond, how you shine
while overpaid announcers whine,
and beer commercials fill the air
while thousands while away their cares,
How could there ever hope to be,
a finer kind of poetry?

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