Take Two!
Posted on March 14th, 2006 by Gavin M.
Investigations continue in the Claude/Floyd Allen ‘evil twin’ case, which has so far baffled authorities.
If only there were some way to tell which one is the thief…
Previously, Claude Allen’s role as facilitator of the Bush Administration’s faith-based initiatives left those programs open for the sadly unused nickname, ‘The Allen-Parsons Project.”
Bradrocket adds: Unwelcome, Michelle Malkin readers!
Oh no, you di int! Michelle’s going to be so pissed off. I can hear the shrill fury already.
…*shudder*
DOCTORED PHOTOS????????????
LET THERE BE GLASS!!!!!!!!!!!!
Previously, Claude Allen’s role as facilitator of the Bush Administrators faith-based initiatives left those programs open for the sadly unused nickname, ‘The Allen-Parsons Project.”
You see? You see what can happen when you step away from the bottle?
Oh Gavin, are you Sirius? Don’t Answer Me.
Obviously, evil conservative twins running rampant over Target merchandise is a case for the amazing Lileks. Where’s his large-foreheaded ass on this matter? I can’t wait, it’d would be like some sort of wingnut crap bomb, with a noticeable “ding” noise going off in the blogosphere.
Like I said at PP’s unsafe haven: I don’t know what Michelle’s in high dudgeon for (okay, maybe because she might melt if at any point she isn’t), because this doppelganger shit is hella funny. The history of the Bush administration plays like one really protracted, really retarded episode of Passions. I’m still waiting for the part where Alberto Gonzales gets trapped in a well.
Isn’t Claude’n’Floyd a German term for feeling joy over the misfortune of others?
Something like that …
What you all may not know is that if you have an evil twin, your evil twin has an evil copy of all your credit cards!
Did you guys even notice that the ‘so-called compassionate Left’ links that Malkin cites are mostly from Livejournal? Who the hell trolls LJ for evidence? Unless you’re doing a research project on bad poetry written by 15 year-olds.
Oh, Gavin, you are the wind beneath my wings(who knew I had 70’s hair?). Even in spite of the New Jersey thing.
I think Claude is the evil twin. Right? I mean before he ripped off Target, he was still evil.
Claudenfloyd. That is so good.
Michelle asks why this is so funny.
I think the fact that a) someone is actually making Floyd the “evil twin” and that b) there is an indirect effort to blame this “evil twin” makes this funny enough.
But let’s also look at the long list of people who either criminally negligent or just criminals who were appointed at one point or another to the White House.
Ok, that’s not really funny, but it hurts so much it helps to dull the pain by laughing.
Michelle asks why this is so funny.
Michelle experiences what the rest of us consider ‘funny’ as an annoying sensation for which someone is to blame.
As a follow-up to the “why is it funny” question, there’s also the fact that the crimes occurred during Allen’s time in the Bush administration which means that he may have thrown away a $161,000/yr job over $5,000 of Target goods and, apparently, the good twin has admitted to doing it (http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/n/a/2006/03/14/national/a090125S48.DTL&feed=rss.news). Is it funny now?
It is both sad and funny, I just learned that the Germans call the Claudenfloyd.
It is possible that the evil twin, when arrested, continued to assert that he was his evil-and-republican twin brother, which the police would have every reason to believe and repeat to the SF Chron.
(I preferred the old photo because it reminded me of Mirror Mirror and evil Spock)
The reason it’s funny is that we’re all drunk on the blood of good Christian children.
I concur on the goatee, and present this as further proof of the absolute necessity of the goatee in determining evil.
nice dental detail
you should rotate ’em, I likes them both!
Michelle experiences what the rest of us consider ‘funny’ as an annoying sensation for which someone is to blame.
Gavin, I think you just won the internet.
You fools! All this time you’ve been posting comments on “Sadly, Yes!,” Sadly. No!’s evil twin blog!
Sadly, Yes! wanted this ridiculous story to get some mainstream attention, and now people will read this, share it (thinking it’s a “joke”), and eventually Jon Stewart will make fun of it on television, and then it will be free to wreak havoc with the truth!
You fools!
Which is the Flawed Allen?
If one is pinched does the other one yelp?
Enjoying this sooooooooooo much!
The craziest part of the whole story is that Floyd Allen was stealing sadistic ob-gyn instruments from Target while Claude was doping himself with laudanum and hallucinating about a mutant Michelle Malkin with abnormal genitalia.
It’s actuall Rumsfailed’s evil twin Monald that fucked up the occupation of Iraq.
And Rick Cheney who shot the lawyer.
I followed the link to Michelle Malkin’s site, and my first (unworthy, perhaps) thought when I saw her picture was,
“Holy crap! Does she realize she’s not white?”
Then I took myself to task for implying that one’s race should determine one’s politics. And then I thought, “But does she?”
I have a good twin.
Not surprising that the most unaccountable, buck-passing motherfuckers in the universe are now resorting to the evil twin defense. Next the dog is going to eat their homework.
Okay, I took a good look at the high school photos…the difference between Claudenfloyd is a lot like the difference between pre- and post-‘roids Barry Bonds.
Granted, the two have aged considerably in the intervening years, but if even an evil, terrorist, traitor spawn-of-Satan like myself can tell the difference, then surely his friends can.
Add the fact that the items being scammed were charged to Claude’s credit card, shave with Occam’s Razor, and Claude is your felon.