Add it to the Dictionary!!!
Posted on March 8th, 2006 by Brad
OK, so Brad is wicked drunk right now.
But!!!
He thought of some extra-kewl definitions to add to the Wingnut Debate Dictionary. Here they are:
1.) Glennocidal Tendencies: the belief that the mass-slaughter of human beings based on their race or ethnicity can be both “unavoidable” and “provoked.”
2.) Glenndetured Servitude: the act of sucking up to Instapundit in the hope that he will link to your blog. Glenndentured servants often suffer from extreme Penis Glennvy and are fond of writing “Welcome Instapundit Readers!”
You may credit both entries to Brad R. of Sadly, No! Thank you… Cheers!!!! 🙂
We gotta be careful, these might be used on Glennzilla!
I love Glennzila. I want to have like a million of his babies.
“Welcome Instapundit Readers!”
Huh. I know I’ve led a sheltered life up to now, but those words go together like “Please scrape your fingernails across this blackboard for the next 4 hours!” or “Somebody smash my kneecaps with a ballpeen hammer!”
What would go less with the sentiment of, “I welcome you”?
“Welcome, painful throbbing headache!”
“Welcome, hungry mutant zombies!”
“Welcome, Andre the Giant, my new Proctologist!”
“Welcome, shameless self-promoting blogwhores!”
Nah. None are as incongruous as the original.
Man, I wish I could be wicked drunk right now. Why does Brad get to have all the fun?
I, for one, welcome our new politically-independent libertarian oversheep.
Man, I cherish the moments that Brad is drunk enough to start referring to himself in the 3rd-person.
Could this be the beginnings of Steel Reserve: Episode III?
Just the memory inspires me to blog the next time I drink.
Wouldn’t “inglenntured servitude” scan better?
I’d rather have a painful throbbing headache than have to pretend to be nice to InstaPundit’s readers.
Glenn Reynolds Wrap (n): An incident in which you have succeeded in getting not only FOX News, but the Pentagon itself to run with one of your memes (see foreign policy, Tinkerbell Theory of).
Welcome, InstaPunsterbunnies!
Of course, one good thing about Instapungents is that they can’t directly comment and so your mind’s eye is spared the vision of Glennolds being thickly surrounded on all sides by hoards of blood-sucking little Instapantload vampire hatchlings pullulating on the orange carpet of the reading corner.
Well, it was spared that vision until just now, at least.
I must go wash. Unclean, unclean…
How about
Glennlivid; a fine single-malt sense of false outrage, aged for 12 years in some Tennessee basement.
And Glenndust: a fine aerosol spray of fatuousness you can use to polish your furniture or cover any political issue in a lovely patina of inanity.
How about “enormous, Glenndacious, disembodied anus”?
And can one get wicked drunk by association?
I normally go out of my way to suck-up to bigtime liberal bloggers, in order to get the highly esteemed blogroll link, and will almost never ever say anything bad about them; but seeing as how my blog doesn’t fit into any of the four blogroll categories here, I don’t have a problem with mentioning that “Glenndentured Servitude” really kind of sucks. You get credit for the first, but that second one is too much of a stretch, even for a drunken sot, and isn’t particularly specific to Insta (seeing as how I’m an admitted blogroll suck-up).
Then again, if you’re ever planning to add a “Bloggers Drunker Than Us” category, I will gladly eat all these words if it meant I had a shot at getting on the board. And if it’s based solely on the amount of alcohol consumed while blogging, I don’t see how I could miss.
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