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Shorter Bob Owens

Only Supply is Dampening The Run On Guns Obamee’s a’comin’ t’ git our guns!! T’ git our guns!!! Stock up all th’ ammo y’can!!!! WOLVERINES!!!!!!! ‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™


Shorter Bob Owens

Obama Mentor Frank Marshall Davis an Admitted Child Rapist The National Enquirer and right-wing blogs are the only news organizations with the guts to tell THE TRUTH about Barack Obama and his gaylord butt buddy poet pal who is gay and into the homo sex. ‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton […]


Shorter Bob Owens

AFP Revises History Watch me cherry-pick numbers in order to obfuscate the fact that hundreds of Lebanese civilians died during Israel’s 2006 bombing campaign. ‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. Gavin adds: You know, life’s short, and I haven’t been able to grasp what he’s trying to accomplish here without […]


Wolverines! Ah, I mean an actual Wolverine! Mommy, get my Anarchy Ouchy Kit!

Pew pew pew, now fall down Federal Government, I shot you! Bob Owens, The Website Formerly Known as Confederate Wanker: Shock the system I’ve said before that what wingnuts lack most is creativity and I think nothing better demonstrates that than the coked-up fantasies wingnuts come up with to describe their idea of what real […]


Q.E.D. (Quod Erat Dumbfuckery)

ABOVE: Bob Owens Shorter Bob Owens, Confederate Wanker Everybody’s A Racist Now The election of a Negro to the White House is definitive proof that there is not a single racist left in the United States and for Obama to say that there are still racists in the United States is definitive proof that he’s […]


Alex, I’ll Take “Racial Slurs” for $100

ABOVE: Confederate Yankee Bob Owens on patrol for Black Bart* One of the favorite memes of the right-wing nutjob-o-sphere is that liberals and blacks are the real racists and that, in reality, the true champions of diversity and racial harmony are conservative white guys who, believe it or not, spend almost every waking hour mulling […]


Please, God, Stop Bob Before He Breeds Again

ABOVE: Bob Owens demonstrates his own patented method of self-defense Shorter Bob Owens, Confederate Wanker Left-Wing Think Progress Advocates Stripping Citizens of Constitutional Rights Without Benefit of Trial, Conviction, or Notice of Even Being A Suspect or Any Other Kind of Goll-durned Notice and Not Even with the Chance to Sit Down and Sip on […]


Ad Verecundiam, Mr. President? For Shame!

Obama makes the common fallacious appeal to authority here, while throwing in some ad hominem and the appeal to ridicule: “I really have no response to that. The last I checked, Sarah Palin is not much of an expert on nuclear issues,” Obama said in an interview with ABC News. Logical fallacies much, Mr. POTUS? […]


A Foolish Consistency is the Hobgoblin of Little Minds

ABOVE: Bob Owens demonstrates his own patented method of self-defense We briefly interrupt our extended coverage of wingnut wunderkind James “Great White Hope” O’Keefe to bring you breaking news from the backwoods of North Carolina where Bob “Confederate Wanker” Owens has improvidently waded into the “fucking retarded” brouhaha involving Rahm Emanuel. Apparently Rahm referred to […]


Scott Brown’s Body

It’s been a while since we checked in with Bob Owens, aka the Confederate Yankee, or as I’ve decided to start calling him, the Dixie Doodle Dumbfuck (DDD): Slowing Brown Down (If He Wins) … while many have come to view a Brown victory as their last, best hope to derail socialized medicine, there is […]