15
Department Of Chumplification
One of the minor Acelings over at Ace of Spades HQ, one Dave in Texas, has become informed that this week’s infamous New Yorker cover is “satire to show how bigoted and ignorant the red-staters are,” and is moved to correct the notion that right-wingers are bigoted and ignorant:
…The New Yorker sucks canal water. It’s a pimp-rag read by snooty snoots and the effete.
We’ve also noticed the degree to which jazz music has been infiltrated by high-hat British snobs like Duke Ellington and Count Basie. Next thing you know, the hoity-toity rooty-toots will be. . .well, if you don’t wish to be jolly, then definitely don’t click this link.
But here’s ol’ Confederate Yankee again, explaining the class struggle in which The Heartland (™) has been consumed since exactly the cover date of March 29, 1976, when a certain Saul Steinberg watercolor changed the American landscape forever and for all time:
[The Obama cover] is tasteless and offensive, but then, much of the content of the New Yorker falls into that category if you live outside the neo-Copernican worldview of a magazine that sees Manhattan as the center of the universe.
And by ‘tasteless and offensive’ he means not just the centerfolds, not just the Dykes of Dalton spread or the fatefully wah-hoo Butts of Barnard series that saw so many bright young women disinherited without a penny, but the articles too. It has articles, right? No, yes — articles. About arugula, and things like that.
What are the odds, do you think, that Confederate Yankee has ever picked up a single ding-dang issue of The New Yorker in his entire dang-dong life?
Those of us outside of that self-involved hemorrhage of land between the Hudson and East Rivers are simply part of a bitter and clingy “not us” to the magazine’s erudite familiars.
Indeed, they should change the name of the magazine to something which reflects its urban parochialism.
But then, Pam Atlas lacks even his degree of self-knowledge:
The New Yorker is calling their latest cover “satire”. I call it wonderful.
Obama is not laughing I hear. Why not? En the gonif brent a hitel.1 :)
[...] I say blow it up and make campaign posters out it. It rocks!
Ol’ Pam’s commenters help to twist it into the full Möbius:
This will be turned around by them saying it was a right-wing attack. Well, I think it perfectly captures these two black racist, Muslim-terrorist-loving, America-hating assholes.
New Yorker Magazine at the Newstand: $6.95
AK-47 on the Black Market: $800
American Flag burning in the Fire Place supplied by Presidential Advisor William Ayers : FREE!
Obama’s Native Costume from his hometown Souk: 17.5 DinarsWhen the New Yorker’s attempt at “Satire” backfires because it turns out to be 100% TRUE: PRICELESS!
Looks like the “joke’s” on them!
Some may call the New Yorker’s cover “satire.” Some may call it “wonderful.” I just call it the plain, ol’ TRUTH!
As for Ms. Obama, methinks the lady (we use the word loosely!) will protest too much!
Somewhere on the Internet is the perfect self-congratulatory blar-har post saying that the New Yorker cover is not funny because conservatives would never fall for such fat-handed and tone-deaf satire — that the cover’s ludicrous broadness only further underscores the elitist liberal bias against conservatives that is so sadly rife in our lib-lib-liberal media. It is not necessary to find it, because we know it is there.
Update: Oh wait.
Obama was right: Another hateful, bigoted attack from … the New Yorker?
posted at 7:52 pm on July 13, 2008 by Ed Morrissey[...]
One side in this cycle certainly seems obsessed by identity politics, but so far it isn’t the Republicans. [...]
The New Yorker is attacking conservatives, but Obama’s the one taking offense (and for good reason). Obama warned that the Republicans would obsess over his ethnicity, but so far only the mainstream Left has made it an issue.
Oh, okay. Guess that’s that, then.
1 Yiddish expression, lit.: “On the thief, the hat burns.”
NobodySpecial said,
July 15, 2008 at 4:08
Pam Atlas speaks another language?
Why does she hate ‘Murika?
Erik Pontoppidan said,
July 15, 2008 at 4:10
Obama is going to be creamed this November because of his parties opposition to offshore oil drilling.
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/2045378/posts
MzNicky said,
July 15, 2008 at 4:10
Used to be a Dave in Texas that commented regularly at RightWingSparkle. Real ignorant piece o’ chunkmeat. I bet it’s the same jackass. I’d check it out but I’ve rigged up the laptop to give myself a good sharp shock anytime I click the link to a wingnut site.
Five of Diamonds said,
July 15, 2008 at 4:12
Those of us outside of that self-involved hemorrhage of land between the Hudson and East Rivers are simply part of a bitter and clingy “not us” to the magazine’s erudite familiars.
I live in Manhattan, and this is very insulting. We are not a hemorrhage of land, but more of a burnt-vomit bucket of land.
Erik Pontoppidan said,
July 15, 2008 at 4:13
A good indication that the Republicans will recapture Congress in November.
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/2045230/posts
pedestrian said,
July 15, 2008 at 4:16
I live in Manhattan, and this is very insulting. We are not a hemorrhage of land, but more of a burnt-vomit bucket of land.
I believe that the correct term is a penis of land.
J— said,
July 15, 2008 at 4:17
[in the voice of Juan, Alfonso Arau's character in Romancing the Stone]
Dave in Texas? The Dave in Texas?
Matt said,
July 15, 2008 at 4:22
A good indication that the Republicans will recapture Congress in November.
This Message Brought To You By The Republicans. Of course they write things like that. Columns entitled “We’re Fucked. Oh, God, We’re Fucked” don’t really rouse the faithful, you know?
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
July 15, 2008 at 4:24
Did those bigoted and ignorant the red-staters ever get suckered into giving Cornfederate enough money to buy a new grill, or whatever he actually spends money on?
bayville said,
July 15, 2008 at 4:30
Nobody knows funny like Pammy Atlas and Confederate Yankee.
“Git-R-Done!”
Snorghagen said,
July 15, 2008 at 4:30
Yes, the New Yorker does have articles, but they don’t really count as content since they’re almost all words with very few pictures, so they’re real hard to follow.
mikey said,
July 15, 2008 at 4:36
Wholly Fuck.
I’m pretty sure I can’t identify any landmarks from here.
Every signpost just says “There be Monsters”.
I don’t recognize this place. Through the looking glass indeed, down the rabbit hole and into some place where lies have more currency than than the truth, and it’s important to be offended by EVERYTHING, where there’s no requirement for evidence, just repeating a story is enough to make it true.
Where peace is evil and war is good, where you defend freedom with torture and you break your own laws for the good of your people.
Where you occupy nations in order to liberate them, and destroy families to make people stop hating you.
I not only don’t recognize this place, I don’t know how to live here. This is madness, legislated, organized, carefully orchestrated madness.
And even here, on this board, sometimes I feel like I’m the only one who sees it…
mikey
comsympinko said,
July 15, 2008 at 4:37
Brain cramping…pain excruciating…aaaarrrgh…
PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF JEBUS MAKE IT STOP!!11!!1!!!1
sunny said,
July 15, 2008 at 4:38
And if the Obama campaign just completely ignored this? A good dozen wingnut voices would be on the airwaves saying “The New Yorker showed a picture of Barack & Michelle at a flag burning. The Obama campaign did not deny that this really happened!”
Mike in Teh Heart...er Shoulderland said,
July 15, 2008 at 4:39
The cartoon would have been better if it was inside a freeper’s thought bubble. :)
Teh Freeps apparently haven’t heard that it’ll be a minimum of 7 years before any of that offshore oil finds it’s way to the pump, if ever . (The Pacific part, along with ANWAR , might go direct to Asia) .
Here’s some genius economic analysis I found while wading through the above-linked freeper muck :
…..The whole mortgage mess can in part be traced back down to the price of gas. If someone is paying $300 more a month in gas then that’s $300 difference in what may have been their mortgage payment. Got to keep their jobs though even if they lose their houses”
Uh, sadly, no ! The “mortgage mess” started back when gas was $1.00-$1.25/ gal . Just took this long to get noticed by the normally oblivious.
Erik Pontoppidan said,
July 15, 2008 at 4:48
“The Pacific part, along with ANWAR , might go direct to Asia) .”
Not if the American people hold there elected representives accountable and demand that the oil ALL OF IT goes to American and America only!
As an American and a Patriot I could care less about the needs of other nations and their people. I care about America and her people. America needs to take care of itself and let these other nations take care of themselves.
DrDick said,
July 15, 2008 at 4:50
I think encountering Atlas Jugs and Confetti Brain Yankee in the same post have turned my brain to slush.
Erik Pontoppidan said,
July 15, 2008 at 4:53
America has if I remember an article I read correctly about 112 billion barrels of recoverable oil concentrated in Alaska and off our coasts.
If we tap into these reserves America will be the world’s second largest oil producer after Saudi Arabia
We then need to by law keep all of this oil for ourselves and then America will be completely energy independent, which means not having to rely in Middle Eastern despots for our oil and it also means lower, MUCH LOWER, gas prices.
D.N. Nation said,
July 15, 2008 at 4:56
Why do knuckledragging freaks give a shit what The New Yorker says? Especially when, as you noted, they’ve probably never read a damn article?
Mike in Teh Heart...er Shoulderland said,
July 15, 2008 at 4:56
“As an American and a Patriot I could care less about the needs of other nations and their people. I care about America and her people. America needs to take care of itself and let these other nations take care of themselves.”
lol!
As money-grubbing bastards , we could care less aboput the needs of
otherthisany nation and their people . The executivesand major shareholdersneed to take care ofthemselvesourselves, andlet others ….Screw you!- Teh Oil Companies
Leon Trotsky, Exile-in-Mexico said,
July 15, 2008 at 4:59
But the free market demands you lay off the oil companies with your stupid nanny-state laws, Erik. If they want to drill into Alaska and then sell all the oil they get to Iran, fuck you, you stupid fucking rube, they’ll make their fortune that way.
Christ, if you’re going to be a leg-humping idiot for the corporate elites, at least realize ahead of time your elites will fuck you over.
D.N. Nation said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:02
BTW, don’t hate on Buncombe County. Redneck wankers like Confeddie are far outnumbered by the hippies.
D.N. Nation said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:04
No. Aaaaaaannndd….no.
Mike in Teh Heart...er Shoulderland said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:08
Erik,Gary,In some places , Fisheries(x $) + Tourism (x $) + Etc (x $) > Oil (x $) , so a spill could cost more than the oil produced . ( & of course the cost of that will be born publicly, while the profit is private)
Besides, we’re in a better bargaining position if we still have those reserves. Let the other guys use up all their oil. ..&… The Alberta oil sands are starting to produce (> Saudi Arabia) , so it’s probably all moot . ( If we don’t don’t piss off Canada entirely)
Snorghagen said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:09
Believe me, I see it. I’ve been watching it getting worse for years. And believe me, I understand how potentially dangerous it is.
Erik Pontoppidan said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:09
I am a supporter of merchantilism which was advocated by Alexander Hamilton which is to put it briefly free market capitalism within our national borders (ie Nationalist capitialism) and economic protectionism outside our borders.
This postition has historically been a Conservative postition advocated by the likes of Presidents Grover Cleveland, Teddy Roosevelt and Calvin Coolidge under which America emerged as the greatest industrial manufacturing nation in the world.
The only three Republican candidates who supported this position were Duncan Hunter, Tom Tancredo and Ron Paul all three of which unfortunately lost the Republican primary.
SomeNYGuy said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:10
You are not. In at least that one fact you can rest assured.
SomeNYGuy said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:12
Oooooooh!!!!! And it’s concentrated!!!!
That means we can, like, add water and get, like, ten times as much!!!
Right?
GeoX said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:14
Oh yeah, by all means, blow up the picture and wave it around like lunatics at rallies. That will make you look sober and rational and not at all like the religious right crazies who cite Onion articles about gay indoctrination as Teh Truth. This seems like an excellent plan with no downsides.
D.N. Nation said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:15
Sure, why not? Why you’ve decided to suck the GOP teat is beyond me, though.
SomeNYGuy said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:18
The role of Erik PompousIdiot seems to have been assumed by a rather ungainly and thick-tongued understudy in his last couple of scenes.
D.N. Nation said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:19
Erik Pompousdouchy has morphed into a sad knock-off of both SowellFan and Gary.
Mike in Teh Heart...er Shoulderland said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:19
mikey , ( & anybody else , so inclined)
check out our little project
http://humanityagainstcrimes.blogspot.com/
We’re workin’ on a few things not so little. ;)
bago said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:20
We then need to by law keep all of this oil for ourselves and then America will be completely energy independent, which means not having to rely in Middle Eastern despots for our oil and it also means lower, MUCH LOWER, gas prices.
Wait, so by limiting our markets and engaging in mercantilism we get cheaper goods? Want to explain that one to wal-mart?
vaara said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:21
Can anyone pinpoint the exact date when it suddenly became OK for patriotic Americans to hate New York again? I mean, yeah, as long as the WTC site was actually still smoldering, the simpering simpletons of sycophancy (a.k.a. the wingnutoblogowebosphere) were forced to keep their animus toward the 212 under wraps.
Now, not so much.
Douglas Watts said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:23
Obama is going to be creamed this November because of his parties opposition to creamed corn.
Me said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:24
Erik Pompousdouchy has morphed into a sad knock-off of both SowellFan and Gary.
As I noted in another thread, he’s also posting links to rightwing websites on a blog that specializes in following links to rightwing websites and killing everything they see once they get there.
Erik, your people are begging you: stop giving the enemy a roadmap, you numb fuck.
Erik Pontoppidan said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:24
While I may not agree with the RNC about free trade, a strong minority of Republicans support merchantilism. The most prominent of which are Duncan Hunter, Tom Tancredo and Ron Paul.
Merchantilism has as a mentioned above, historically been a Conservative and Republican position. Ron Paul mentioned this numerious times during the Republican debates.
I do however agree with the Republican party on most other issues such as.
1. Border security & enforcement of our immigration laws.
2. the Second Amendment.
3. Pro-life.
4. Sanctity of marriage.
5. War on Terrorism and National security.
6. Lower taxes.
7. Smaller government, less spending, less regulation.
Those and many other issues would in effect classify me as a Republican.
Douglas Watts said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:24
Can anyone pinpoint the exact date when it suddenly became OK for patriotic Americans to hate New York again?
Black people live in New York and act like they own the place.
Nuf sed.
Douglas Watts said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:26
Those and many other issues would in effect classify me as a Republican.
What about the latent homosexuality?
Snorghagen said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:26
Bullshit. Grover Cleveland advocated a dictatorship of the proletariat, permanent revolution, and wall-to-wall sex. You sleep through high school history class or something?
Gary Ruppert said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:28
The fact is, Erik? Get the fuck out of here. I own the exclusive trolling rights to this blog, and I won’t allow that to be infringd on.
Heartland.
Douglas Watts said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:28
Grover Cleveland had non-consecutive-term White House sex.
Even the Clenis has been thwarted in this Olympic sport.
vaara said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:30
And Calvin Coolidge was secretly into snowballing.
Douglas Watts said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:31
And Calvin Coolidge was secretly into snowballing.
Which explains why he forbade the Boston Police to go on strike.
Erik Pontoppidan said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:31
Erik, your people are begging you: stop giving the enemy a roadmap, you numb fuck.
My fellow Patriots are more than capable of handling themselves I assure you. They have the ability to defend their positions with facts and refute liberal arguments just as well as I do.
Me said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:32
1. Border security & enforcement of our immigration laws.
2. the Second Amendment.
3. Pro-life.
4. Sanctity of marriage.
5. War on Terrorism and National security.
6. Lower taxes.
7. Smaller government, less spending, less regulation.
Eh, I might give you No. 2. Guns continue to be an integral part of American life, and there’s no end in sight. You win.
On everything else on that list, your party has objectively been an utter failure, even when they controlled the entire apparatus of government. Yeah yeah, facts are stupid things, blah blah…
Douglas Watts said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:35
1. Border security & enforcement of our immigration laws.
2. the Second Amendment.
3. Pro-life.
4. Sanctity of marriage.
5. War on Terrorism and National security.
6. Lower taxes.
7. Smaller government, less spending, less regulation.
–
Not so much on all those “other” Amendments …
R said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:37
It heartens me that, given the Sadly, No! tendency toward satire, you’re able to recognize satire. I’m sure that Lord Atrios will soon label you “wankers” or “concern trolls” for the crime of disagreeing with his highness, but I encourage you to do as Bush I, and stay the course.
Me said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:39
They have the ability to defend their positions with facts and refute liberal arguments just as well as I do.
Which is why this site will live on. As you were.
Righteous Bubba said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:39
Dave in Texas!
Also.
Douglas Watts said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:43
R — The only people who will not see the satire in the NewYorker cover are those who bought hats with a Confederate Flag on them after Spike Lee’s movie Malcolm X came out that said … “You’ve got your X, I’ve got mine.”
“Larry the Cable Guy” was ultimately based on that hat.
D.N. Nation said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:43
Erik Pontoppidan-
You’re boring as fuck.
Rightwingsnarkle said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:44
Used to be a Dave in Texas that commented regularly at RightWingSparkle.
Yup, that’s the one.
Class A #1 Wingnut Chickenshit with a gun fetish and uncurable case of MILF lust.
Me said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:44
I’m sure that Lord Atrios will soon label you “wankers”
I’m sure that Lord Atrios won’t trouble to rouse himself from his couch long enough to write anything more than “Open Thread”, so you can set your mind at ease.
Douglas Watts said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:48
Class A #1 Wingnut Chickenshit with a gun fetish and uncurable case of MILF lust.
And that narrows it down … how ?
Erik Pontoppidan said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:48
3. Pro-life
The Supreme Court last year banned partial birth abortion thanks to President Bush’s two outstanding appointees.
4. Sanctity of marriage.
Gay marriages bans have been voted in the Constitutions of 27 States thanks to Republicans.
5. War on Terrorism and National security.
No further terrorist attacks have occured on American soil in 7 years and Afghanistan and Iraq have been liberated and now have democraticly elected governements and thousands of terrorists have been either killed or captured.
6. Lower taxes.
Bush tax cuts ring a bell?
Have we done as good as we should have? No. Maybe next time we’ll vote out the rinos and have true Conservative Republican candidates. But we still do better than the Democrats at enacting a Conservative agenda.
Jennifer said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:49
Heh. Jon Stewart got Rickrolled by John Oliver on the Daily Show.
In other news, kitty brought me another rat this evening. A big one. Unfortunately, it wasn’t dead and she let it go, being more interested in being petted than in dispatching it. Thank goodness she didn’t bring it inside, though I find the idea of the rat lurking around in the side yard almost as bad.
Jennifer said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:51
Hmmm. It appears that I am not the only vassal here who is less than enthralled with Lord Atrios.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:52
D.N. Nation said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:43
Erik Pontoppidan-
You’re boring as fuck.
Does that mean you’re denying credit for this particular finger puppet, D.N.?
Douglas Watts said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:53
Gay marriages bans have been voted in the Constitutions of 27 States thanks to Republicans.
Cross-reference to State Constitutions that allowed human slavery?
Just wondering.
Douglas Watts said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:55
Have we done as good as we should have? No. Maybe next time we’ll vote out the rinos and have true Conservative Republican candidates. But we still do better than the Democrats at enacting a Conservative agenda.
Re-stated without comment.
Jennifer?
Lesley said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:56
— articles. About arugula, and things like that.
arugula and Abu Ghraib.
Lesley said,
July 15, 2008 at 6:03
I remember Dave very gay in Texas.
Me said,
July 15, 2008 at 6:06
It appears that I am not the only vassal here who is less than enthralled with Lord Atrios.
Jennifer, for me to be “enthralled” with His Lordship, he’d have to…do something.
Brandi said,
July 15, 2008 at 6:20
They have the ability to defend their positions with facts and refute liberal arguments just as well as I do.
That badly, huh?
J— said,
July 15, 2008 at 6:22
Mike at Flopping Aces is onto something:
Of course! Why didn’t anyone think of it before?
R said,
July 15, 2008 at 6:23
Well, whether Atrios deserves his “lordship” or not, he does wield a lot of influence. He’s also been campaigning hard the past day against anyone thinking the Obama cover is ha-ha.
One of the reasons I’m a Sadly, No fan is the fact that they’re proud liberals who stand up against boring liberal orthodoxies. So I’m just encouraging them to keep on keeping on.
Rightwingsnarkle said,
July 15, 2008 at 6:24
Anyone smell the hand of Hillary here?
Yup, because she always said that if she didn’t get the nomination, she was going into publishing.
GSD said,
July 15, 2008 at 6:25
Why would Bush lackeys claim success for the notion that no attacks have occurred on US when they constantly tell us that Bin Laden has declared Iraq as the central front in Al Qaeda’s war against the US?
-GSD
Some Guy said,
July 15, 2008 at 6:27
“AK-47 on the Black Market: $800″
Umm.
You can probably get an AK-47 on the “black market” (even though they’re legal again in the US, but then you can’t make it SCARY!) for about $100 or less. Seriously, do you have any idea how many of those things are floating around the planet?
Oh looky! A new toy!
“We then need to by law keep all of this oil for ourselves and then America will be completely energy independent, ”
Pffffff! Hahahaha! Riiight. That would SO TOTALLY HAPPEN!
But golly, Mr. Troll, wouldn’t that be Socialist Marxist Communist Big Government trampling on the Free Market’s rights to make money?
Then he keeps posting! Too fun!
“No further terrorist attacks have occured on American soil in 7 years”
Dead Americans don’t count unless they were on this side of the Magick Line.
” and Afghanistan and Iraq have been liberated and now have democraticly elected governements”
Granted they’re useless puppet governments who sit back and suckle off the American taxpayers, but we’re pretty sure that one day they’ll get bored of that and starting walking and talking on their own. Seriously, any day now.
I could also point out that the democratically elected governments in the Middle East have actually gotten more fundamentalist and anti-American, but that might make your brain hurt to have to think something with more depth then, “Bad. Good.”
“and thousands of terrorists have been either killed or captured.”
But so have thousands of Americans… oh, right. See above.
vaara said,
July 15, 2008 at 6:29
… and when every single act of violence perpetrated by a brown person since 9/11/01 has been attributed to Teh Mooslims? Most notably Seung-Hui Cho. Remember Pammy’s little jihadette against him?
Me said,
July 15, 2008 at 6:30
R, dude, I’m totally on your side. I’m sorry I didn’t make it more obvious.
g said,
July 15, 2008 at 6:50
The only three Republican candidates who supported this position were Duncan Hunter, Tom Tancredo and Ron Paul all three of which unfortunately lost the Republican primary.
so they were too stupid even for Republicans. Right.
bayville said,
July 15, 2008 at 6:56
A scientific “revelation” from the new Big Big Thinker at AEI:
Arthur Brooks, author of Gross National Happiness: Why Happiness Matters for America—and How We Can Get More of It, offers John J. Miller a revelation:
“People who call themselves conservative or very conservative are about twice as likely to say they are very happy people, as are those who say they are liberal or very liberal.”
Sources Brooks uses for this “revelation” include the late philosopher Buck Owens, comedian Bill Engvall and the Branson Cowboy - John Davidson.
And of course, Ronald Reagan
g said,
July 15, 2008 at 6:56
Those of us outside of that self-involved hemorrhage of land between the Hudson and East Rivers (are simply part of a bitter and clingy “not us” to the magazine’s erudite familiars) are ready to avenge the carnage of 9/11
OK, fixed it.
g said,
July 15, 2008 at 6:56
How do you do strikethrough again?
Douglas Watts said,
July 15, 2008 at 7:00
I don’t understand why anyone could not like the island of Manhattan and the boroughs of New York City. They are, to a great extent, the sum of all the hopes and dreams and fears of a great …
never mind.
g said,
July 15, 2008 at 7:03
anyone smell the hand of Hillary here?
Yup, because she always said that if she didn’t get the nomination, she was going into publishing.
Yes, and she had her eye set on publishing a snarky metropolitan literary magazine. Of course! It’s the keystone of her empire!
g said,
July 15, 2008 at 7:05
refute liberal arguments just as well as I do.
OK. Well then. so they should basically give up, then.
J— said,
July 15, 2008 at 7:07
Use the term “strike.”
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
July 15, 2008 at 7:07
How do you do strikethrough again?Spell it out, “s” and “/ s” don’t getter done.
[strike] and [/strike]
g said,
July 15, 2008 at 7:13
thanks, thunder
J— said,
July 15, 2008 at 7:13
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© is making sense!
g said,
July 15, 2008 at 7:15
I have to confess, I saw the cover at the start of this post, and I unexpectedly laughed so hard I spit my [alcoholic] drink out, and then choked on it, and then peed my pants.
It was the “hurry-cane done got mah char-coal grill” that got me.
I hate you.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
July 15, 2008 at 7:19
J— said,
July 15, 2008 at 7:13
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© is making sense!
Don’t get spoiled or nothing. I don’t wanna set expectorations too high.
gbear said,
July 15, 2008 at 7:24
OT. The choppers were buzzing St Paul today practicing security for the republican convention. Fuck it was annoying. Cops with their sirens blaring chasing down the road with a chopper flying shotgun, choppers getting up close and personal with the office towers downtown, and a fucking chopper hovering over my house for about 15 minutes this evening. I’m painting a big ‘Fuck You’ on the roof of my garage.
Rightwingsnarkle said,
July 15, 2008 at 7:30
I’m painting a big ‘Fuck You’ on the roof of my garage.
May I suggest “John McCain eats shit?”
Twernt Nuthin said,
July 15, 2008 at 7:40
Shouldn’t this latest cover be labelled post-satire instead? All those comedic elements have been bouncing around the blogosphere for months.
gbear said,
July 15, 2008 at 7:42
May I suggest “John McCain eats shit?”
It’s only a one car garage.
Some Guy said,
July 15, 2008 at 7:44
“People who call themselves conservative or very conservative are about twice as likely to say they are very happy people, as are those who say they are liberal or very liberal.”
Yeah, but how many dogs would say they’re ‘Unhappy’?
Seriously, when you’re political world view consists of, “Kill the ragheads, keep them darkies outa my country, and no new taxes.” how hard is it to be satisfied?
Oop. There I go being all elitist and Eats coast, again.
karen marie said,
July 15, 2008 at 9:24
how disappointing.
i wanted to post this quote from h.l. mencken over at ace of spades hq but “page not found” came up twice after clicking “access comments.
“The larger the mob, the harder the test. In small areas, before small electorates, a first-rate man occasionally fights his way through, carrying even the mob with him by force of his personality. But when the field is nationwide, and the fight must be waged chiefly at second and third hand, and the force of personality cannot so readily make itself felt, then all the odds are on the man who is, intrinsically, the most devious and mediocre — the man who can most easily adeptly disperse the notion that his mind is a virtual vacuum.
“The Presidency tends, year by year, to go to such men. As democracy is perfected, the office represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people. We move toward a lofty ideal. On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart’s desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.” (Baltimore Evening Sun, July 26, 1920)
i suppose the irony would be lost on them.
lobbey said,
July 15, 2008 at 12:05
Oh, thats how you do it?Good to know.JanSchoenmakers said,
July 15, 2008 at 12:14
It’s fucking depressing to see all the racism and xenophobia PLUS the profound hate against all that is intelligent, responsible and economically, ecologically and socially sustainable.
It’s just unbelievable how many scumbags in this nation seem to have an ineffaceable urge to self-destruct and take the rest of the world with them in a spiral of dumbness, ignorance and hate.
Somebody stop this madness, please?! How about sending all those bigoted wingnuts to Alaska…let them drill for oil up there in the snow…with sticks and screwdrivers!
W. Kiernan said,
July 15, 2008 at 12:30
Erik Pontoppidan: I do however agree with the Republican party on most other issues such as… 5. War on Terrorism and National security
In other words, you don’t ever want to catch Osama bin Laden. You don’t even want to make a show of trying. It’s off to
IraqIran instead!luneylegume said,
July 15, 2008 at 12:49
Thucydides made a similar observation on the advent of the first first world war .
Arky - Sexual Orient Express said,
July 15, 2008 at 13:17
“On the
thiefderanged bimbo, thehatstoopid burns.”Unless I’m mistranslating the word “stoopid.” Could be “implants.”
alec said,
July 15, 2008 at 13:27
Somebody stop this madness, please?! How about sending all those bigoted wingnuts to Alaska…let them drill for oil up there in the snow…with sticks and screwdrivers!
And let ‘em practice that self-reliant shit they like to think they’re so big on in an environment where inherited money and connections still won’t save your ass from bears.
I like this idea more and more the more I think about it.
Ken Peggs said,
July 15, 2008 at 13:39
1. Border security & enforcement of our immigration laws.
2. the Second Amendment.
3. Pro-life.
4. Sanctity of marriage.
5. War on Terrorism and National security.
6. Lower taxes.
7. Smaller government, less spending, less regulation.
Hmm.
1. Kick em out….
2. …by any means neccessary…
3. …filling their jobs with new Americans, purpose-bred!
4. So long as we don’t get distracted in confusing ways.
5. Then take them out, remotely…
6. … which will pay for itself…
7. …at which point we can turn out the White House lights, power down the furnaces, and dismantle Washington. MISHUN ACCUMPLISHED!
Fixed.
WereBear said,
July 15, 2008 at 13:42
Of course, these very happy people don’t have a fuckin’ clue.
See: the hopelessly deranged.
WereBear said,
July 15, 2008 at 13:42
Also, vis a vis: Mikey
Arky - Sexual Orient Express said,
July 15, 2008 at 14:45
Dear Sir,
I would like to object in the strongest possible terms to your proposal that we poison Alaskan wildlife by feeding them fReichtards.
Yours Sincerely,
Abernathy Backnforth.
p.s. Harrumph!
TR said,
July 15, 2008 at 14:46
Of course, these very happy people don’t have a fuckin’ clue.
Ignorance really is bliss.
jjcomet said,
July 15, 2008 at 15:13
Geez, Erik, if you’re going to use the term “mercantilism” as if you really understood what it meant, perhaps you could trouble yourself to spell it correctly? And how does your support of the GOP square with their focus on free trade, which is the diametric opposite of the “economic protectionism” you champion? Do you ever wonder, if mercantilism is such a marvelous economic system, why the world abandoned it so long ago?
D.N. Nation said,
July 15, 2008 at 15:15
That’s correct. Heh. Indeed. We’re winning! Read the whole thing.
inkadu said,
July 15, 2008 at 15:21
On why conservatives say they’re happier than liberals:
Conservatives are think denying they are unhappy is the same thing as being very happy. Just like they think denying Iraq is a disaster will pave the road to victory.
And so on.
pedestrian said,
July 15, 2008 at 15:23
Erik, I know you are trying out for stupidest parody troll ever, but would you mind spelling it Mercantilism? I get it. I appreciate the smug chuckle you are trying to treat us to every time you misspell your core political issue. It just isn’t that funny.
pedestrian said,
July 15, 2008 at 15:33
Thucydides made a similar observation on the advent of the first first world war .
Um… what?
Anyone smell the hand of Hillary here?
What do you imagine her hand smells like?
Money? Crown Royale? Snatch? Cyanide? CEO spunk?
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
July 15, 2008 at 16:05
You pedantic spelling Nazis leave Erik Pont d’Avignon alone. Maybe he really means Natalie Merchant-ilism, a fidicuary philosophy espoused by 10,000 Maniacs.
notMicroZealous said,
July 15, 2008 at 16:07
“People who call themselves conservative or very conservative are about twice as likely to say they are very happy people…”
“To be stupid, and selfish, and to have good health are the three requirements for happiness; though if stupidity is lacking, the others are useless. ” Gustave Flaubert
J— said,
July 15, 2008 at 16:08
What do you imagine her hand smells like?
Money? Crown Royale? Snatch? Cyanide? CEO spunk?
As the guitar player says, there’s a lot of pretty thoughts that I ain’t thunk.
The Really Real Erik said,
July 15, 2008 at 16:08
I have one message for all your dirty LIE-berals:
You are all, and I mean ALL, nasty poopyheads.
Poor Excuse For A republican said,
July 15, 2008 at 16:14
Some Guy said: “Oop. There I go being all elitist and Eats coast, again.”
Fixed: “There I go being all elitist; I eat toast”
The dirty elitism of liberals takes many forms. Us in the heartland must make sure all our bread is White and Untoasted. If those things were good enough for Jesus, they’re good enough for me!
Basharov said,
July 15, 2008 at 16:27
People who call themselves conservative or very conservative are about twice as likely to say they are very happy people, as are those who say they are liberal or very liberal.
Jonathan Swift described this state of affairs succinctly as “the supreme felicity of self-deception.”
Fats Durston said,
July 15, 2008 at 16:39
“No further terrorist attacks have occured on American soil in 7 years”
Dead Americans don’t count unless they were on this side of the Magick Line.
You forget! The Magick Line growed up around the U.S.
fortressembassy in Baghdad. Were those attacks on this American soil not by terrorists?eruvande said,
July 15, 2008 at 16:55
I’d like to shake the hand of the person who wrote the anti-troll Greasemonkey script for Sadly, No.
All I have to do is copy “Erik Pontoppidan” into my little scripty-poo, and refresh the page, and from then on out, all he says is “I farted.”
Gary Ruppert farts a lot.
eidos said,
July 15, 2008 at 17:22
…much of the content of the New Yorker falls into that category if you live outside the neo-Copernican worldview of a magazine that sees Manhattan as the center of the universe
Inveterate Wanker’s analogy is a bit messed up here. He should have said “pre-Copernican” (geocentric) rather than “neo-Copernican” (heliocentric).
OneMadClown said,
July 15, 2008 at 17:41
People who call themselves conservative or very conservative are about twice as likely to say they are very happy people, as are those who say they are liberal or very liberal.
This may have something to do with the fundamentally different worldviews of conservatives and liberals….
Liberals, often being possessed of some level of compassion and empathy for others and a modicum of social awareness, have a harder time being “very happy” while they know that others are suffering, the environment is in peril, our human rights are being violated, etc.
Conservatives, generally displaying a callous and nigh-sociopathic disregard for anything beyond the wants and desires spawned in their own withered, black little turd-hearts, can sleep like babes while the rest of the world burns, just as they “got theirs”. “Very happy” is considerably easier to achieve on a daily basis when you don’t give a flying fuck about anyone but yourself.
Caveat said,
July 15, 2008 at 17:46
Here’s how I think the New Yorker (been reading all my life and I don’t live in New York) blew it.
They should have had an inbred, uneducated slob from the Fartland imagining the Obamas that way. Or maybe a member of one of ‘those’ organizations in full regalia. You know, a dream bubble a la Dave Berg.
That would have made it clear to the bottom feeders who live among us that it was a rib. Trouble is, jokes aren’t funny if nobody gets them or if people can’t laugh at themselves, the wingnut contingent being central to my point.
.
Righteous Bubba said,
July 15, 2008 at 17:49
Trouble is, jokes aren’t funny if nobody gets them
“Nobody” in this case being a proportion of people and not nobody. Fuck them.
Caveat said,
July 15, 2008 at 17:56
I stand corrected, RB.
Let me rephrase that: A joke isn’t funny if the intended audience, woefully lacking in a sense of humour due to its inability to interpret things other than literally as well as its stubborn inclination to rationalize and thereby perpetuate a state of denial.doesn’t get it.
Righteous Bubba said,
July 15, 2008 at 18:12
A joke isn’t funny if the intended audience
Well here’s the sticking point. The intended audience is New Yorker readers, who will, in all likelihood, get it. It might perhaps take one mental gyration further than the usual chuckle over a cliche juxtaposed with some new-fangled piece of technology or culture.
ohioans everywhere said,
July 15, 2008 at 18:40
Pam’s Yiddish is terrible. Not only is the phrase properly rendered as Afn gonif brent das hitel, it’s used to describe a situation when a guilty wrongdoer suspects that his or her guilt is well known (i.e., a burning hat) even if no accusations have been made.
jim said,
July 15, 2008 at 21:51
1 - Biggest influx of illegal immigrants in living memory - heckuva job, Georgie! With borders as big as America’s, you’d literally have to draft every adult in the land to stand guard to make it a reality - & it’d STILL fail hard. Oh, & thanks for reminding me that McCain is now campaigning against HIS OWN BILL on immigration - you are such a pal.
2. You mean like when they had Blackwater confiscating all those guns in NO after Katrina? THAT “the Second Amendment”? Only reason it still exists is that folks haven’t been using Republicans for target-practice - once their hides are threatened it’ll become the same Charmin as the rest of the Constitution, & you know it.
3. Not if that life is post-partum though - & definitely not if it’s dark-skinned &, oh, say, Iraqi or Afghan. Yeah, & that whole death-penalty thing kind of screws the pooch on “Pro-life” too - it’s been considered pretty much barbaric in the rest of the industrialized world since before you were a gleam in Daddy’s eye. Deal. Can’t you at least TRY to be honest & say “anti-abortion” instead? Baby Jesus won’t cry, I promise.
4. Having a party so packed with divorcees & known pedos as your Home Team for marriage-protection is sort of like asking David Duke to chair the NAACP: bonus points for chutzpah but WOW do you ever look fucking stupid doing it with a straight face. Do hard drugs much?
5. Tried to sell out Port Security to Dubai. Didn’t do jack to get bin Laden. As noted above, that Embassy in Iraq IS American soil, by law, so you can STFU about the “no attacks since 2001″ horseshit too. You’re also omitting the simple truth that what the US is doing in Iraq IS terrorism, as defined in any half-decent dictionary - they were minding their own business, you kneecapped their entire country & are now propping up a pack of crooked bastards who are keeping them in 24-7 misery, while forbidding them from running any non-US-approved parties in their “elections” … feel more secure yet?
6. Ooh, I think we have a winnar!!!111!1one! I bet all the people losing their jobs & homes will be SO grateful that the tax base no longer supports silly things like emergency aid or shelters, too. Besides, only liberal elitists use things like roads, power-plants or water anyways, right? The Glorious People’s Free Market will get you all a pony that craps caviar any minute now, right? Oh, & just like his “Read My Lips” Pappy, he’ll jack taxes sky-high the minute he’s told to, shrugging with the same goofball smirk on as ever - the American public is shit on his shoe as far as he’s concerned: he obeys those who own his ass & knows that ANY major disobedience to their wishes is a guarantee of either a shiny set of handcuffs, or a 9mm hollow-point Retirement Plan.
7. LOL! DHS is like a tutorial in how to waste mountains of public money while accomplishing fuck-all. Is that FISA amendment part of the “less regulation” master-plan too? Americans can only WISH their government would get smaller, but funnily enough, every GOP regime keeps expanding its scope & authority exponentially. You feel like rolling those dice one more time, honey? It’s your life.
Bonus points for being a mercantilism-cheerleader.
Too bad you’re already so far in hock to China - what makes you think they’ll let you welsh on them with isolationist policy, or that you even have that option at this late date? Consult your calendar - it is NOT 1937 anymore.
birdseatbugs said,
July 15, 2008 at 23:19
No. No, no, no, NO. We have entirely too many wingnuts here as it is, we don’t need any imported wingers.
sagra said,
July 15, 2008 at 23:23
Mikey, your post made me think of this quote from “They Thought They Were Free”
sagra said,
July 15, 2008 at 23:30
Q: Eric hates the free market captialism that made our country strong because: a) he’s a Marxist, or b) he hates America. Discuss.
blucas! said,
July 16, 2008 at 0:18
I like how all they hate New York so much, but are happy to raise the specter of 9/11 whenever it suits them.
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
July 16, 2008 at 1:52
Q: Eric hates the free market captialism that made our country strong because: a) he’s a Marxist, or b) he hates America. Discuss.
Erik Pont d’Avignon, l’on y danse!
I’m surprised no one’s laughed at the notion that increasing trade barriers on oil will reduce the price of gas. If you produce more oil than you use, then sure blocking up trade’ll let you get away with Venezuela-like gas prices. If you’re demand for precious black gold is insatiable - not so much. Perhaps SowellFan can explain this for us with the law of economics.
Jon Swift and Others on Satire-Gate (The Obama New Yorker Cover) said,
July 16, 2008 at 8:48
[...] I admit it. I am afraid I thought the infamous cover was hilarious. It didn’t occur to me till the condemnation started rolling in that it could be detrimental of Obama in the wrong hands. I can’t imagine that anyone with a sense of context (or humor) could possibly have taken it as anything but a knock at those who buy into attempts to demonize Obama. But I understand the concern of those such as Jesse Taylor at Pandagon who perfectly well understand the intent while still feeling concerned that the cover might just give legs to the rumors. (And if you don’t believe thatthere is a segment of the public who prepared to swear that the cover is an absolutely literal and accurate accurate depiction of the secret life of the Obamas , see here, here, and here.) [...]