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Shorter Frank Gaffney
Above: Gaffney, Pam Atlas
- As the president of a leading conservative think-tank, I should like to sound an alarm about [cough cough] an international conspiracy of Semitic bankers.
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™
Orange Tom said,
June 24, 2008 at 4:11
Err….is labelling your bank’s policy “Sharia-compliant” really any different than putting the words “certified Kosher” on a Weight-Watcher’s frozen dinner?
Susan of Texas said,
June 24, 2008 at 4:21
Bankers want money? You’re kidding. Does anyone else know this?
um said,
June 24, 2008 at 4:24
Orange Tom- not to be contrarian, but methinks the equivalent of certified Kosher would be Halal.
Just ask all the Kosher Jews who nosh at Shawarma King!
Orange Tom said,
June 24, 2008 at 4:32
not to be contrarian, but methinks the equivalent of certified Kosher would be Halal.
Yeah, I get that, I’m just doing a “on the other hand” sort of thing, like labelling a movie “approved by Bill Donohue and the Catholic League” (shudder). You know, like “it’s ok for you, but not for me, these labels?”?
badger badger badger™²³®© said,
June 24, 2008 at 4:33
shrieking harpy.
Never forget!
P.S.
Dobson accuses Obama of ‘distorting’ Bible
By ERIC GORSKI, AP Religion Writer 44 minutes ago
COLORADO SPRINGS, Colo. – As Barack Obama broadens his outreach to evangelical voters, one of the movement’s biggest names, James Dobson, accuses the likely Democratic presidential nominee of distorting the Bible and pushing a “fruitcake interpretation” of the Constitution.
The criticism, to be aired Tuesday on Dobson’s Focus on the Family radio program, comes shortly after an Obama aide suggested a meeting at the organization’s headquarters here, said Tom Minnery, senior vice president for government and public policy at Focus on the Family.
The conservative Christian group provided The Associated Press with an advance copy of the pre-taped radio segment, which runs 18 minutes and highlights excerpts of a speech Obama gave in June 2006 to the liberal Christian group Call to Renewal. Obama mentions Dobson in the speech.
I meant, “Never FORGET, YOU FRUITCAKE INTERPRETATIONISTS!one1!
P.P.S. AP can kiss my badger ass.
lobbey said,
June 24, 2008 at 4:33
….. transnational Islamic order governed by a ruling authority, the Sunni’s Caliph or his Shiite counterpart, with Shariah as its foundational law or constitution.
As well as being unable to spell Sharia correctly, he couldn’t be arsed looking up what the Shia counterpart was. Bit lax, for a so called Islamic expert.
Some Guy said,
June 24, 2008 at 4:41
Gods, I thought that was Jack Perkins at first.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3I910e-UMv0
I do believe Pammy may well be the very first “butter mind”, although “butter face” do apply to her as well. You could grate diamonds with that mug.
Gerald Curl said,
June 24, 2008 at 4:52
Fuck, the combining of sharia and Pam Atlas flooded my mind with sound and images from that excruciating parody video she created, “My Sharia.” From hell’s heart I stab at thee!
the_millionare_lebowski said,
June 24, 2008 at 4:55
Patless Mam(maries)?
Tom said,
June 24, 2008 at 4:59
This can’t be! A conservative suggesting that capitalists might do bad things for money! Next he’ll be suggesting that we need the government to regulate our corporations.
EdsAppliance said,
June 24, 2008 at 5:14
It looks like Frank’s shoulder got some.
Inconstant Reader said,
June 24, 2008 at 5:32
I was completely distracted from Gaffney’s (deliberate?) ignorance of what “Sharia-compliant” means by Pam Atlas’s rantings about how Muslims believe Islam came into being to supplant Christianity and Judaism, not live alongside them.
Pammy, hate to tell you this, but your “Christian Zionist” friends think exactly that about Judaism. Go ask your slumber-party pal Ann Coulter about “perfected Jews.”
Pere O. D. Troll said,
June 24, 2008 at 5:45
Wall Street is forced to these thing’s due to the onerous regulations forced down their throat by the democrat party. In a true open market they would not have to look outside the US – they could make plenty of money from good old America.
The Jew controlled international banking cartel, by secretly funding the ivory tower liberal “economists,” can put another notch in it’s belt. When was the last time MacDonald’s sold the delightful McRib sandwich? They don’t anymore because it’s not kosher. Even great American institutions like MacDonald’s aren’t safe from you Moslem loving socialists. You won’t be happy until the Ayatollah is in the White House.
Jennifer said,
June 24, 2008 at 5:50
When was the last time MacDonald’s sold the delightful McRib sandwich? They don’t anymore because it’s not kosher.
And here I thought the McRib went away because it was straight-up disgusting. MMmmmm, reconstituted meat product compressed into the shape of a rib? Now THAT’S good eatin’!!!
(Note: I have never personally consumed a McRib, due to the factors I’ve outlined above. One of my friends got one once and told me later that it was disgusting…my response was, “who could have guessed?” I should note that this friend was not the sharpest knife in the drawer.)
Red said,
June 24, 2008 at 5:55
McRib sandwiches smell like bestiality.
Righteous Bubba said,
June 24, 2008 at 5:57
MMmmmm, reconstituted meat product compressed into the shape of a rib? Now THAT’S good eatin’!!!
That one took remarkable gall. Perhaps entrails as well.
Arky H8r of VürdPress said,
June 24, 2008 at 6:11
Um … Gavin, are you perchance in D.C?
Rightwingsnarkle said,
June 24, 2008 at 6:13
Hey, c’mon! The McRib was an innovation.
What’ll you dis next – Chicken McNuggets?
Righteous Bubba said,
June 24, 2008 at 6:15
What’ll you dis next – Chicken McNuggets?
You head to the coop and BOO! and the chickens flap around like crazy and then you pick up the tasty nuggets that fall off. Yum.
Abdiel said,
June 24, 2008 at 6:21
Did anyone notice Gaff[e]ney’s heavy reliance on someone named David Yerushelmi?
Ever heard that name before?
Yerushelmi heads up a project called Society of Americans for National Existence, an excuse to capitalize words unnecessarily in the hopes that would scare the Sand People enough to scram. Among his primary aims was (and presumably remains, although his site at http://www.saneworks.us has been under renovation for the last six months or so) to return America to its glorious first principles, an imagined utopia where only white men could vote. His Mapping Sharia project (www.mappingsharia.us), run by the uber-credible Dave Gaubatz–that’s the guy who swears up and down he found the WMD in Iraq, but the US Army allowed the Sand People to take them away–aims primarily at every single Muslim in America today in order to prove his or her connection to the Global Caliphate Conspiracy. Sound like a guy you want in your corner?
GSD said,
June 24, 2008 at 6:43
McRibs were made of the same product as Brickmaster siding. Which is the same as the filling in the zip-loc bag’s on Pammy Pooh’s chestal region.
Deeeee-lishus.
-GSD
Jennifer said,
June 24, 2008 at 6:46
McRib, McNuggets…I stopped eating all that fast food shit years ago, never ate much of it to begin with. The one remaining place I still would go, up until a few months ago, was Subway, which compared to the others offers relatively healthful food. But the last time I had one, as I said, a few months ago, there was no taste to it at all. The meat tasted like the cheese tasted like the veggies tasted like the bread…that was the end of that. Fast food aside, I find I’m becoming more and more finicky about what I will eat as time goes by…it all started with my Kroger jihad 5 years ago, when I bought, by accident, some of that shitty chicken Tyson injects with chemical brew, indicated on the package with 4 point type that it has been “enhanced with up to 15% broth” – “broth” being shorthand for preservative-laden salt water. The stuff was so shitty that even the cat wouldn’t eat it. And within a few months, it was the ONLY chicken available at Kroger. I filled out a complaint card, they called and I told them my gripe – that it not only tasted bad but that I wasn’t keen on paying $2 a pound or whatever for the 15% of the weight that was salt water, and what the hell did they expect customes on restricted salt diets to eat? Surprisingly, they listened and within a month were stocking non-injected chicken…as time went by, the non-injected chicken took over more and more of the shelf space to the point that they hardly stock Tyson chicken anymore. I’ve only gotten worse since then – I won’t buy anything with high fructose corn syrup (thank heavens for Hispanic immigrants – I can get Mexican Cokes at the Hispanic grocery), I won’t buy deli meat or anything injected with solution, now I’m on about all my beef, chicken and turkey being pasture-raised, which means I can’t buy meat at the grocery store at all anymore.
Most of the people in this country have forgotten what real food tastes like, if they ever were fortunate enough to have tasted it in their lifetime.
Orange Tom said,
June 24, 2008 at 7:48
The Jew controlled international banking cartel, by secretly funding the ivory tower liberal “economists,” can put another notch in it’s belt. When was the last time MacDonald’s sold the delightful McRib sandwich? They don’t anymore because it’s not kosher.
…unlike their completely kosher double bacon cheeseburger with pork slaw on the side!
Red said,
June 24, 2008 at 8:26
If you like meat and give a shit about where it comes from, look into buying a share in your friendly local meat CSA.
Stevenovitch said,
June 24, 2008 at 8:36
Is it me or was Pam Atlas created by rubbing two porno tapes together?
foo said,
June 24, 2008 at 10:17
Actually, it *is* a Semitic conspiracy, since Arabs are Semites (by definition)
White Male, Jew of Liberal Fascism said,
June 24, 2008 at 12:39
Hell, Sharia Law is good enough for Blackwater!
http://blog.foreignpolicy.com/node/9081
MzNicky said,
June 24, 2008 at 13:12
Could we take a short recess from discussing Pam’s breasts and the repulsiveness of fast-food and get an explanation of what “Sharia(h)-compliant” means?
My lengthy research (90 seconds on Google) indicates that
“Most UK mortgages involve the house-buyer borrowing the money and paying it back with some interest charged on top. No good for Muslims. To avoid the issue of paying interest, Muslim mortgages usually involve the bank buying the property and then the buyer purchasing it from them and renting it over a length of time at a slightly increased price.”
and
“Islamic law prohibits investing in businesses that are considered unlawful, or haraam (such as businesses that sell alcohol or pork, or businesses that produce media such as gossip columns or pornography, which are contrary to Islamic values).”
Anyone got any ’splainin’ they can do? Like the Chimp-in-Chief, I got a B in economics.
badger badger badger™²³®© said,
June 24, 2008 at 13:46
Here’s my research, Mz Nicky.
Smut Clyde said,
June 24, 2008 at 13:56
Pam’s breasts and the repulsiveness of fast-food
Has anyone else noticed how, when you throw up blood, it looks like coffee grounds?
Gavin M. said,
June 24, 2008 at 14:30
‘Fraid not; what’s up?
Micky Kaus said,
June 24, 2008 at 15:13
Has anyone else noticed how, when you throw up blood, it looks like coffee grounds?
My vomit usually looks like chevre.
tigrismus said,
June 24, 2008 at 15:38
I just threw up my own entrails and read my future: “the day’s only going downhill from here.” So thanks for that.
Olexicon said,
June 24, 2008 at 17:28
Shariah Carey?
Athenawise said,
June 24, 2008 at 18:43
I’m probably the last to notice, but Pammy Atlas has redesigned the banner of her homepage. It used to be some sort of golden stick figure holding up the world. Now it’s … Pammy, breasts and all! She also put her name above the title, like Jerry Bruckheimer.
MzNicky said,
June 24, 2008 at 19:59
Okay, I guess not.
bartkid said,
June 24, 2008 at 23:35
I think the last word has a typo.
Instead of “a”, it should be “oi”.
Doctorb said,
June 25, 2008 at 1:20
Maybe Boinker has some ugly, unsavory connotation we haven’t thought of… Might it be a vague sexual euphemism?
jackd said,
June 25, 2008 at 4:21
Chicken McNuggets?
You head to the coop and BOO! and the chickens flap around like crazy and then you pick up the tasty nuggets that fall off. Yum.
No, Righteous Bubba, that’s not how it works. Huge trucks pull into the McD’s processing locations every day, laden with live chickens. The birds are loaded onto conveyor belts that lead into the maw of a large machine with dials and gauges and steam and sprockets and stuff. There is a momentary surprised squawk from each chicken after it enters the machine. From the other end the McNuggets emerge.
bago said,
June 25, 2008 at 14:41
Nothing like the black chunky vomit.
Kip W said,
July 7, 2008 at 2:08
I believe that what enters the processing machine is the chicken coop, complete with the sawdust that lines the floor. I expect there is more sawdust than chicken, and I say that as someone who has tried the things. If you douse them in sauce, they taste like sauce.
scoop! the clarion fund is… « abdiel | islam on the wet coast said,
September 17, 2008 at 17:39
[...] the head of the Center for Security Policy. You might recognise Frank Gaffney Jr’s name as a primary agent of the movement against Sharia Compliant Finance (SCF). His main reason for opposing this easy and legal means to incorporate Muslim money into the free [...]