14
Stoop!d Murray
best way to heat Pop-Tarts.
Iain Murray, one of the Britwankers over at America’s Shittiest Website™, apparently had his bs-meter removed at the same time they carved out a large chunk of his cerebral cortex. The result, of course, is that if he sees a shiny little bauble of wingnuttery lying around somewhere on the web, he picks it up with glee and parades it around as if he had found the Hope diamond. To wit:
Latest from the U.N. Human Rights Commission [sic] [Iain Murray]
What’s the biggest human rights issue in the world? The establishment of a military junta in Zimbabwe? The callous indifference of the Burmese government to the suffering of their people after the cyclone? The tyranny in Uzbekistan? Of course not. In a move that will gladden Lyndon LaRouche’s heart, they have decided that the British monarchy and unwritten constitution need to be challenged.
Oh, you mutter, there must be some mistake here (other than Murray’s fucking up the name of the Human Rights Council). And there is (in addition to Iain’s parents’ decision to bring him to full term).
And it’s a mistake that is readily apparent to anyone who can ask the Great Gazoogle to take him or her to the original source material, which is, in this case, the Report of the Working Group on Universal Periodic Review of the United Kingdom. Now go to page 17 of the Report and you will find this recommendation:
To consider holding a referendum on the desirability or otherwise of a written constitution, preferably republican, which includes a bill of rights (Sri Lanka)
You may wonder why “Sri Lanka” is in parenthesis at the end of that recommendation. That’s because Sri Lanka — and Sri Lanka alone — made the suggestion. Wander down a little further in the report and you’ll see this — in big, bold letters so that even wingnuts can’t miss them:
All conclusions and/or recommendations contained in this report reflect the position of the submitting State(s) and/or the State under review thereon. They should not be construed as endorsed by the Working Group as a whole.
Ah, so it’s not a recommendation of the Human Rights Council or even the Working Group but only a suggestion from the U.K.’s great friend and ally Sri Lanka. Actually, the former colony might have a little grudge to bear against the U.K. You see, after widespread criticism of the human rights record of Sri Lanka’s authoritarian regime, Sri Lanka recently lost its seat on the U.N Human Rights Council. And the U.K just won a seat on that council.
Does Iain remind anybody else of the kid you told in elementary school that bacon grease was really good for your hair, only to see him the next day at school, followed by all the neighborhood dogs, his hair all shiny and reeking of smoky pig fat?
El Cid said,
June 14, 2008 at 17:32
The problem with you leftists is that you refuse to recognize clear and present dangers just because some fact or two stand in the way.
christian h. said,
June 14, 2008 at 17:53
Don’t be such a contrarian!
I’d say that Iain must be one of those decentists who are too stupid even for Harry’s Place, but that would imply such a thing is possible. So forget that.
El Cid said,
June 14, 2008 at 17:57
Oh, by the way, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, and when I say bad news I mean pointing out the onrush of the apocalypse, last night at the moving picture show there was a trailer for…
…for…
God, I just can’t say it.
F*** it.
Glenn Beck is going on a live “comedy tour” which will be simulcast in movie theaters around the country, in what I’m sure will be just the biggest blockbuster sell-out show in this country since “Applications of Statistical Techniques to Epidemiological Studies of Progressive Kidney Deterioration 2006 World Tour 3D With Special Guest Stars The Old Dudes Who Sang ‘Macarena’”:
On the bright side, somewhere in the wreckage, some comedy will be found by the forensic examiners of the horror.
And those scientists studying interactions of subatomic particles too could benefit, because possibly doing those experiments during the show would reveal what would happen as seconds stretched into minutes, minutes stretched into years, and 2 hours became a hellishly unending forever.
Dr. BDH said,
June 14, 2008 at 17:57
It’s always craptastic when you follow the link to NRO. My favorite today: KLo quotes Darth Cheney going all Rudy! on the occassion of Tim Russert’s death by immediately bringing up…9/11! It’s like interviewing a one hit wonder who has to mention that one top 10 hit no matter what the question. It’s a good thing KLo and the boys had their irony lobes excised along with their cortices and bs meters, ’cause it ensures they’ll always highlight the conworld’s most embarrassing attributes.
mikey said,
June 14, 2008 at 18:07
Waitaminute here.
England doesn’t have a constitution?
Well, how do they know who to discriminate against then?
mikey
Monkay said,
June 14, 2008 at 18:09
It’s not as though there wouldn’t be plenty to write about if they bothered to get the facts right in the first place; it seems that it is a goal to get the facts wrong while supporting the party line. A quick look at the site, and I read that stem-cell research is like alchemy, and has no medical value; OK, oppose supporting the research with tax money if you want to, but at least do a little research of one’s own and see that there is a lot of potential for the stem-cell research . . .
Percyprune said,
June 14, 2008 at 18:59
England doesn’t have a constitution?
Incorrect. We have an unwritten one.
zeppo said,
June 14, 2008 at 19:00
Well, all I can say is that it is a good thing indeed that I haven’t experienced “the real Glenn Beck. The imitation one is way too much for me.
ifthethunderdontgetya™²³®© said,
June 14, 2008 at 19:08
Broder.
We didn’t know what kind of a journalist Tim would be — or even whether he was serious about being one. It didn’t take long to figure out that he would be one of the best — and most fearless — in the business.
Matalin:
As the Bush administration assessed how to respond to criticism of how the U.S. went to war in Iraq, Cheney’s then-chief press aide, Cathie Martin, listed their best option as putting Cheney on “Meet the Press.”
Martin wrote in a memo that the show “is our best format” because “we control the message a little bit more.”
~
ifthethunderdontgetya™²³®© said,
June 14, 2008 at 19:30
Ooops, I seem to have mixed up Mary Matalin and Cathie Martin.
I don’t know how that could have happened.
Marsupial said,
June 14, 2008 at 19:46
England doesn’t have a constitution?
Incorrect. We have an unwritten one.
Interesting… We used to have one.
D.N. Nation said,
June 14, 2008 at 20:06
UN Human Rights Council = Wankery
Murray’s right about that. Not about anything else.
henry lewis said,
June 14, 2008 at 20:28
In Canada, we have a ‘notwithstanding clause’.
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
June 14, 2008 at 21:01
England pre-dates constitutions by several centuries, however noticing the fact that all her citizens were dropping like flies due to a lack of constitution, it was constituted that they take morning constitutionals, possibly with a stop for tea and crumpets.
Pre-dating the constitution you exclaim. That’s ridiculous, Old Ironsides fought in the War of 1812! Be that as it may, you might remember that old saw there will always be an England. Well, clearly then it follows that there must have always been an England, making the nation possibly even older than Cher.
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
June 14, 2008 at 21:04
Would someone please explain what any of this has to do with Lyndon LaRouche.
noen said,
June 14, 2008 at 21:17
It’s not a bad idea though, these constitution things. Getting rid of the monarchy once and for all would be a good idea too. So would elections, do they still have those? It may be too late though as the UK seems to me to be a fait accompli police state already. Maybe they will have the honor of a real shooting revolution in the UK because that is what it will take to dislodge the fascists now in charge.
Crazy Ass Wingnut™²³®© said,
June 14, 2008 at 21:29
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
June 14, 2008 at 21:04
Would someone please explain what any of this has to do with Lyndon LaRouche.
Everybody knows Lyndon LaRouche is a crazy ass!
Monkay said,
June 14, 2008 at 21:29
you might remember that old saw there will always be an England. Well, clearly then it follows that there must have always been an England
Logic can be fun!
Lesley said,
June 14, 2008 at 21:35
David Frum pleads David Frum’s case against those who blame GW Bush in the National Post
the paragraph that stands out…it could be one of the wingnuttiest statements of the century.
Suicidal Zebra said,
June 14, 2008 at 21:51
We got rid of the Monarchy one weekend in 1642. It didn’t take, Parliament didn’t have anyone to blame when things went tits-up as they so often do. Hence the current situation, where the Monarchy has power with the proviso that they would never use it, and Parliament governing on the understanding that they would never do so good a job as to make the public think that oversight, even if only theoretical, is unnecessary. I’d take perpetual political detant over an elected head of state any day.
England hasn’t done too badly with a system dependant on cynicism to keep it stable, with more and more freedoms being gradually recognised by Parliament. The only problem occurred during the last war, when the Monarchy had the bad taste to be useful.
Proud American said,
June 14, 2008 at 21:57
Just, wow. So this is the liberal left fever swamp? You loons are laughable. McCain is gonna win. Nothing but hate and envy from you and your hero Osama.
ifthethunderdontgetya™²³®© said,
June 14, 2008 at 21:58
Lesley, that is a fine example of the Chewbacca Defense.
With the additional bonus that the patently ridiculous strawman argument in question is in fact exactly what wingnuts do when they discuss race.
Simba B said,
June 14, 2008 at 22:03
Just, wow. So this is the liberal left fever swamp? You loons are laughable. McCain is gonna win. Nothing but hate and envy from you and your hero Osama.
You’d better hope he does because I don’t think your bedsheets could survive a black President.
Snowwy said,
June 14, 2008 at 22:13
Simba just said it better than I could.
fardels bear said,
June 14, 2008 at 22:14
Lyndon La Rouche’s particular brand of nuttiness blamed the Queen of the UK for all the world;s problems: She was responsible for the international drug trade, all war and the temporary popularity of the Bay City Rollers.
Fozzetti said,
June 14, 2008 at 22:18
Perhaps England could go with a written constitution and an Elected Monarchy. Think of the fun there would be in running for Queen or King!
Lesley said,
June 14, 2008 at 22:22
Bush could enter Frum’s house, shoot him in the head and nuke his pets and Frum would find a reason to defend him.
J— said,
June 14, 2008 at 22:31
Murray knows the power Sri Lanka wields over the United Kingdom, on or off the council. They have the tea, Ceylon black tea, and they who control the tea, control the ukverse.
g said,
June 14, 2008 at 22:35
Do trolls get those little magnetic kits in boxes, and put their talking points together on their refrigerator door?
MzNicky said,
June 14, 2008 at 22:37
the temporary popularity of the Bay City Rollers.
I always used to get the Bay City Rollers mixed up with REO Speedwagon. I dont know why.
Karl Rove said,
June 14, 2008 at 22:38
Do trolls get those little magnetic kits in boxes, and put their talking points together on their refrigerator door?
That level of creativity and originality would be highly unpatriotic.
The Corner Quint said,
June 14, 2008 at 22:39
You have city hands, Mr. Murray. You been countin’ money all your life.
MzNicky said,
June 14, 2008 at 22:40
The S,N! InternetsTubular apparatus seems rather sluggish and weird today. Have anything to do with the downstairs threads that are teetering with hundreds and hundreds of comments each?
I blame The Fool, and of course Bush.
mikey said,
June 14, 2008 at 22:47
Yeah, dood. Sure, and there’s so much for an American to be proud of these days.
mikey
Some Guy said,
June 14, 2008 at 22:57
Ya gotta love the troll logic.
Wingnut: The Sun most definitely revolves around the Earth, because I’m pretty sure the Bible says so.
Us: Umm, that’s actually quite not true, hump.
Wingnut Troll: ZOMG THE LEFT IS FULL OF THE HATE AND INTOLERANCE!! CIVIL WAR!!
In other news, I’m looking forward to the towering President Barack Obama Monument being erected between the Washington Monument and the Capital building, towering over the landscape a good few hundred meters taller then anything else in the city. So say we all.
Suicidal Zebra said,
June 14, 2008 at 23:10
Elect one person to rule with nearly limitless power and negligible oversight? Who do you think we are, American’s?
Patkin said,
June 14, 2008 at 23:17
But this is a naïve understanding of how the human mind works.
Whereas,
“they hate us for our freedoms!” is a nuanced, complex geopolitical comprehension of both human psychology and social dynamics.
Fucking loser.
Lesley said,
June 14, 2008 at 23:26
Off topic, the last scene of the season finale of BSG was filmed 10 minutes walk from my place. It brought tears to my eyes.
Lesley said,
June 14, 2008 at 23:32
this is a naïve understanding of how the human mind works.
if I could hack into the Post I’d make this the title of Frum’s essay. This would also be a suitable tattoo for his forehead.
Smut Clyde said,
June 14, 2008 at 23:36
Applications of Statistical Techniques to Epidemiological Studies of Progressive Kidney Deterioration 2006 World Tour 3D
Meta-analysis is hawt. I would do it.
Smut Clyde said,
June 14, 2008 at 23:38
As it is, I have sworn a vow of monogamous commitment to multidimensional scaling.
Mrs Tilton said,
June 14, 2008 at 23:49
Murray is far from stupid. He’s worse than that.
He won’t be smearing bacon grease in his own hair any time soon, but he spends his days urging koolaid drinkers to smear it in theirs. And why? Quite simple: for money. He has a family to feed and isn’t too scrupulous about how he feeds it.
Aside to Percyprune: actually, most of the UK constitution is written; it’s just that you won’t find it all between a single pair of covers. The glaring defect of the UK constitution is nothing to do with whether it is written down. It is that, for the most part, UK courts can’t strike down legislative acts as constitutionally repugnant.
Brandi said,
June 15, 2008 at 0:23
In other news, I’m looking forward to the towering President Barack Obama Monument
Nude, on a unicorn.
Smut Clyde said,
June 15, 2008 at 0:23
At least Murray regards it as a serious human-rights issue when a government is oblivious to the suffering of some sector of its population in the wake of a storm. Isn’t this encouraging?
D.N. Nation said,
June 15, 2008 at 0:29
You can blame me for many things- Iris, Jason Ambrose, Matt McMahon- but you can never blame me for this troll. He’s on his own.
ifthethunderdontgetya™²³®© said,
June 15, 2008 at 0:38
D.N. Nation said,
June 15, 2008 at 0:29
You can blame me for many things- Iris, Jason Ambrose, Matt McMahon- but you can never blame me for this troll. He’s on his own.
Can we blame you for shoelimpy and annie angle?
Nayagan said,
June 15, 2008 at 0:46
“Murray knows the power Sri Lanka wields over the United Kingdom, on or off the council. They have the tea, Ceylon black tea, and they who control the tea, control the ukverse.”
I think SL’s biggest tea customer is Russia. But it is that damn good. A whole cup will bring prescience and also enslavement to the mandates of the golden path. (Perhaps even convinced Ian Botham to drink less beer)
justme said,
June 15, 2008 at 0:46
When I was a kid, we had a scratching post that suffered that fate.
Doctor Missus Marita said,
June 15, 2008 at 0:49
Hey Boston Area Sadlys -
I need e-mail addresses from you people (I’ve gotten some of you to respond, but am missing a bunch). If you don’t e-mail, you won’t be invited to the par-tay.
[e-mail me at marita at mit.edu]
justme said,
June 15, 2008 at 0:49
Some Guy,
You’d best watch out, or these folks are going to put a hurt on you.
justme said,
June 15, 2008 at 0:54
or is that who brings presents to the poor kids?
Tom said,
June 15, 2008 at 0:54
I think the main problem with the US Constitution is that only 5 of our Supreme Court justices have read it.
justme said,
June 15, 2008 at 0:58
And can somebody please relate to mister Murray just what an incredible hoot it is to defenestrate oneself from thirty or forty stories up?
Mehitabel the Abyssinian said,
June 15, 2008 at 2:20
It certainly works for me.
jim said,
June 15, 2008 at 4:08
So this is the liberal left fever swamp? You loons are laughable. McCain is gonna win. Nothing but hate and envy from you and your hero Osama.
Those loveable trolls – they never let an annoying externality like reality besmirch the beauty of a juicy Talking Point. They’re like the modern-day versions of Bertrand Russell, that is, if he’d been drifted repeatedly in the back of the head with a 2-by-4 & fed lots of mescaline.
Any response to the proximity of malevolant asshats NOT involving a generous dose of weapons-grade fear & loathing is to be regarded with profound suspicion.
Mock them, whether they know not what they do or not.
White Male, Jew of Liberal Fascism said,
June 15, 2008 at 4:32
It should be noted that Iain Murray’s accusation is fairly standard wingnut fare.
Ann Coulter harangues the New York Times for being outrageously liberal— but fails to mention that the outrageous quote she is screeching about came from somebody’s guest op-ed column.
Bill O’Reilly chides the Daily Kos for saying something outrageous— but fails to mention that the quote came from some anonymous commenter.
And now the wingnuts are screeching about some of the comments at Obama’s blog, which has a totally open policy for commenting.
I kind of suspect that a lot of the outrageous blog comments are actually made by rightwing trolls— remember how they used to plant comments supposedly by leftwingers which would call Bush “Chimpy McHitlerburton”?
Wingnuts are consumed by such zealotry that they see no reason why little things like truth and facts should cloud the horizon.
justme said,
June 15, 2008 at 4:52
Meh, I’m drinking some Sri Lankan tea right now. It’s quite mediocre, really, but it keeps me out of the vodka.
The Tea Must Flow.
Percyprune said,
June 15, 2008 at 9:56
A pedant writes:
Actually, it was 1649 when we did the monarch in. When the Civil Wars began in 1642 Parliament was careful to state that it was not fighting the King so much as as his ‘evil advisors’. Their propaganda announced that the Parliamentarians were Charles’s loyal subjects, fighting to protect the King and preserve the monarchy. And most Parliament men believed that, at least in part. The issue of regicide did not appear until much later in the wars, after Charles had escaped and tried to raise his standard again (and yet again). But then Charles, who could so easily have come to an accommodation, was largely the architect of his own downfall.
As for what came after, Cromwell was offered the crown and to his credit refused. He was the classic model of a godly and upright man of principle seduced by power. He was no liberal, of course, given as he was instrumental in quashing the proto-liberal movements such as the Levellers. He was a man of the ‘middling sort’, of what Gore Vidal would call the ‘Property Party’. He is a grand example of what happens when the Conservative propertied classes achieve unfettered power.
He held the country together exceedingly well until his death. Competent tyrants do that. However, the country did not have a tyrant of equivalent talent and stature to replace him, which is why the Republic went tits up at the end.
You mean, just like the planet Naboo? How did that work out for them?
(add smileys as appropriate)
Porlock Hussein Junior said,
June 15, 2008 at 11:13
Dragon King Wangchuck mentions that there will always be an England. Which brought on a reminiscence and a new and unpleasant thought.
There are still numerous fans of Flanders and Swann scattered through these colonies, who will strike up a chorus of “Glorious Mud” or “I won’t eat people” at — well, at the drop of a hat. And some may remember the new patriotic song they wrote for England. (Not for some “Britain”!)
With typical English reserve, the refrain was:
“The English, the English, the English are best!
I wouldn’t give tuppence for all of the rest.”
Their intro delved into existing songs, scorning “Jerusalem” and examining the logic of “There will always be an England”. Flanders questioned what was so remarkable about that: So what? — there will always be a North Pole, he said — unless some dangerous twit comes along and melts the thing!
!!
Did he know he was a prophet? And should the English be worried about the omen?
Percyprune said,
June 15, 2008 at 12:06
Don’t forget that Flanders and Swann’s ‘Song of Patriotic Prejuduce’ ended with a rumination on the non-English world:
Professor Illuminata said,
June 15, 2008 at 17:00
Umm…
Percyprune said, “[Cromwell] was the classic model of a godly and upright man of principle seduced by power.” and later “He is a grand example of what happens when the Conservative propertied classes achieve unfettered power.”
Given Cromwell’s behavior in Ireland, I’ll happily grant the second point, but have grave reservations about the first…
Percyprune said,
June 15, 2008 at 19:29
Cromwell’s actions in Ireland are evidence of his Godliness. He was fighting a religious war against a foe he sincerely believed to be the Antichrist. The depredations of the Ulster Uprising were still fresh in the memory, and whatever the truth of stories about Papist atrocities, Cromwell and his army viewed the Irish much as modern conservatives view Jihadis–as barbarian monsters to be conquered and enchained. The term ‘Beyond the Pale’ was invented specifically to describe these people. It did not help the Catholic cause that the plundering army of Owen Roe O’Neill and the obdurate agitations of the Nuncio Extraordinary, Giovanni Rinucinni, served only to confirm in the minds of Godly that the Irish were a foe to whom no quarter could be given.
Sir Craig said,
June 16, 2008 at 0:18
Damn, the things you learn here – my entire knowledge of Oliver Cromwell and the whole trashing of the monarchy comes from the old Monty Python bit.
Kip W said,
June 16, 2008 at 3:12
I’m guessing that Petulant American has to sleep in a bag, because he wears his white sheets out.
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
June 16, 2008 at 14:27
“The English, the English, the English are best!
I wouldn’t give tuppence for all of the rest.”
That reminds me of that Chris Rock movie where by some freaky accident, he ends up being a nominee for President. Only in the movies will you find crazy ideas like a black man running for President. Well, anyways, the chilling line in the movie, supposed to be funny but way too close to real, is how his opponent ends all his speeches:
“God bless America, and no place else.”
JDinDC said,
June 16, 2008 at 16:37
“T’was whispered Napoleon paid Josephine’s rent.
‘Nonsense,’ said Bonaparte, ‘She lives on her own apart.
In her own apart-ment.’
Percyprune said,
June 16, 2008 at 18:16
Such models of friendship are precious and rare,
Though the friendship of models is not!
sagra said,
June 16, 2008 at 21:58
The other 4 prefer it over both Charmin and the quilted brand.