30
Furrygate: The Furrying
It’s been a rough week for Dan Riehl, Steve Gilbert and their fellow dumpster-diving, countertop-appraising Stinkertons. In pursuing the riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma that isn’t the military record of Barack Obama’s great-uncle, they’ve had their ears boxed by a WWII vet, been easily proven wrong in their speculative fantasies and come this close to breaking bread with Holocaust deniers as they parsed the differences between stops on the Nazi roadmap to the Final Solution.
It really couldn’t get more embarrassing for these people, could it? Well, it could, but we’d have to imagine a twist to this story so far-fetched as to beggar belief. Like, say, if the eager investigator on Gilbert’s ‘Sweetness and Light’ blog who sent harassing emails to WWII vet Ray Kitchell and his son Mark:
—– Original Message —–
From: cigarskunk
To: [mark kitchell]
Sent: Wednesday, May 28, 2008 6:38 PM
Subject: Searching for Charles W PayneDear Sirs,
In light of the recent controversy over the military service of Barrak Obama’s grandfather, Charles W Payne, I was hoping to contact you to get some kind of verification of his membership in the 89th.
I’ve checked the records of http://www.kshs.org/genealogis…..p;branch=N and they only list him as being in the Navy.
I would like to get a second source to confirm that Obama is still lying on this subject as my grandfathers, father and uncles all served in WWII, Korea and Vietnam and I don’t particularly care for politicians lying about the service of family members to further thier political agendas.
Thank you in advance!
From: [Mark Kitchell]
To: cigarskunk
Subject: Re: Searching for Charles W Payne
Date: Wed, 28 May 2008 18:52:48 +0200You are the one who is lying. Mr. Payne served in the 89th Divison, 355th Infantry Regiment, Company K.
…Turned out to be a sexual fetishist who regularly commissions artwork of himself as a cigar-chomping skunk getting its knob sucked by a menagerie of voluptuously drawn cartoon rabbits, gophers and other assorted mammalia. If he turned out to be a regular attendee of ‘furry’ gatherings so desperate and noxious in his social interactions that members of that oft-maligned subculture shunned him as a pariah.
Which is preposterous, of course. There’s just no way a person like that could be one of the leading figures in the Wingnutosphere’s ongoing Great Uncle investigation. It would be far too surreal if… Wait, what’s that you say?
No, you must be jok-
OMFG. You are fucking kidding me.
Above: Art hiked from Crush Yiff Destroy
(h/t: Archer 813 in comments.)
Gavin adds: Props and apologies to our furry commenters Cargo and Simba. From Crush Yiff Destroy comes an encomium, excerpted below:
In August, Cigarskunk came to CYD in order to assert his heterosexuality and to explain why the furries hated him: He was 100 percent straight, he smoked, he was conservative, and he brought females to conventions, because he was not gay. He stated, restated, and then stated some more that he really loved women and was totally straight, and then went on to call everybody else gay. Literally; he responded to every negative post by calling the poster a closet homosexual or a homophobe, and he did so in the kind of haughty manner that makes you want to plunge your hands through your computer screen and wrap your fingers around the throat of the person on the other side.
After babbling endlessly that he wasn’t gay and everyone else was, Cigarskunk began to ramble about cigars and how great they were. It was fetishistic: “Cigars, cigars, cigars, by God, I love cigars. My favorite color is cigar-brown. Cigar smoke, cigar smell, cigar taste; cigars are fucking great. I really, really like cigars. Cigars make my day. Cigars have a Zen-like quality to them, and they’re so damn good. Ooh, yes, cigars. I think about cigars all the time. I fucking love cigars.”
Rest assured, by the time his ass was banned in record time (after a mere 3 posts), everyone knew that he really, really, really loved cigars. Afterwards, Cigarskunk pounded out essays of staggering length, detailing how everyone at CYD was a lunatic and all the hate was heaped upon poor little him. Plus, cigars were great. Everyone pointed and laughed.
D.N. Nation said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:14
Oh please. Next thing you’re going to tell me is that Glenn Reynolds, the intrepid lawyer, citizen journalist, and macho firearms connoisseur is all into, oh I dunno…robot love, or something.
r€nato said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:14
Bah. It ain’t kinky unless there’s two wetsuits and a dildo up the arse.
Desert Rat said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:17
You know, when you’re way too crazy for the freaks that are into furries, it’s well past wetsuits and dildos levels of crazy.
r€nato said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:18
Are you trying to tell me there is some sort of symbolism associated with a homophobic rat-winger who loves to suck on a cigar?
Your Uncle Bastard said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:19
How incredibly accurate that he refers to HIMSELF as “a whore”.
WTF is it with these wingnutjobz? Is it really that cognitively painful to quit pretending you’re not a fur-lovin fag? He’s not a skunk, he’s a BEAR.
r€nato said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:20
an open-minded, alt-lifestyle conservative who demands tolerance for his ‘beliefs’ and ‘life-choices’.
I am speechless.
PS said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:22
In honor of Mr Kitchell, I offer this proposed response to trolls everywhere:
Pickbuttrickoff
Try it, with emphasis on the second syllable.
[For those with short-term memory issues or returning from a brief absence: PCBUTRYCOF -- Please crawl back under the rock you came out from]
EK said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:24
This is some top notch citizen investigative journalism.
Righteous Bubba said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:26
I maintain that the cigarskunk emails are fadgeries.
Cargo said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:29
I am a furry, longtime reader of S!N. Most of us are pretty liberal. But there’s a few… and cigarskunk is more of a loon than most.
not even an mba said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:33
You know, when I first read the name cigarskunk I thought about how appropriate it would be to add to the wignut help thread, but now I just want to point out three things:
1. Whatever weird perverted fantasies gets their rocks off, so long as only consenting adults are involved.
2. Although cigarskunk may have helped do the digging, the creepy littl freak isn’t the one who called a WW II vet a sheehanite or posted personal information about the Kitchells.
3. BWAHAHAHAHHAHA
r€nato said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:37
Yeah, forget about, you know, all the evidence to the contrary which proves that Obama was NOT lying. He’ll settle for anyone, anywhere - even some homeless person - who will tell him what he wants to hear.
PeeJ said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:39
But what about teh children!?!?!? He’s a pedofurry!
bughunter said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:39
Dude! What happened to the [NSFW] tag? Really, help us malingerers out here a bit more.
That said…
BWAAhahahahahaha!!! *gasp* HahahahaHAAAAhaaaa-aaaa…
*thud*
WereBear said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:39
We have a WINNAH!
The competition was fierce. But we have a title holder for “Most Personality Issues Within a Single DNA Container.”
Give ‘em a cigar… no wait.
Better not.
fadgeophile said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:40
I’m still trying to maintain a reality wherein these type of people don’t exist.
Susan of Texas said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:41
I guess this gives a whole new meaning to the term rat-fucking.
Susan of Texas said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:43
cargo and any others, I apologize in advance and retrospect. There’s no way I’m going to be able to not go for the funny.
Travis Disaster said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:43
This is the greatest thing ever. Thank you, Sadly, No! Thank you.
John Cole said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:43
I think I see a CPAC Blogger of the Year Award in this guy’s future.
tontocal said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:44
I took a gander of an actual pic of this ’skunk’ guy and I must say, my penis just threw up.
Jude said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:44
Holy jeebus.
Oh dear god, don’t ever do that again without warning us. I’m gonna go wash my eyes out with bleach now.
Sophist, FCD said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:45
Ahem:
lulz!
…that is all.
Susan of Texas said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:45
And many awards from National Review and think tanks.
Maybe he’ll get a fancy candlestick like Jonah.
EJ said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:45
You’d think this was all some elaborate prank, but in all honesty, who could make something like this up?
HumboldtBlue said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:46
Wow, wow, double-wow and another furry wow because, well, just wow.
“I would like to get a second source to confirm that Obama is still lying on this subject as my grandfathers, father and uncles all served in WWII, Korea and Vietnam and I don’t particularly care for politicians lying about the service of family members to further thier political agendas.
We call them “The Fighting Furballs.” Or, as Susan so astutely pointed out, rat-fuckers.
D.N. Nation said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:46
I see Cigarskunk has gone with Wild Cherry Pepsi instead of the usual wingnut beverage of choice. He’s out there.
Additionally, to prove my point for me, Glenn over at Instapundit is talking about attending some meeting about space issues and taking pictures of actual females at said event. Aaaaaand the beat goes on.
Dr. Loveless said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:46
Years ago, when I still hung out on Usenet, it was discovered that one of the wingnuts who posted regularly to my favorite newsgroup also frequented alt.sex.colostomy. Until now, I considered her the end-all definition of “right-wing gasbag,” but God help me, I think Cigarskunk tops her.
So to speak.
Susan of Texas said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:50
And conservaties say they don’t like them there furriners. Little did we know.
ShouldKnowBetter said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:50
I can’t deny it’s funny-even though some of my friends are furries. Sigh. Bless ‘em.
But furries or not, they’re good folk. What they sure as hell are not is WWII-vet hounding, hate-mongering, slandering, holocaust-deniers.
Susan of Texas said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:51
Do you suppose they have partners with Muppet fetishes, or would that be considered crass commercialism?
salvage said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:51
I have never been so agog and aghast at the same time.
I’m agoghast.
Woman With Perpetually Raised Eyebrows said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:51
Welcome to the 2008 Republican Convention, may I have your name and reservation number? Thank you, and what is your sexual perversion? Speak up! I can’t hear you. Oh, I see. Will you be requiring any live animals for that? Very good. I will put you in the “non-criminal” wing. It’s rather empty at the moment…
Cargo said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:51
Susan of Texas - oh don’t worry - we’re used to it. We have been laughing at Cigarskunk for years.
And it is funny! Sex is funny in general. :) Most of furry is hanging around with friends and sketching. It’s more just a geeky smart bunch of people to hang around with, many of whom have rather odd sexual imaginations. Annnd, yeah, some are wingnuts. But far far far more are moonbats. :)
tb said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:52
The entire thing is fucking moronic- these brain-damaged scumbags don’t even know what they’re trying to prove.
not even an mba said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:53
I don’t understand furries and have little or no empathy for them, but I do feel bad that this piece of shit cigarskunk is going to be their public face for a while.
Gavin M. said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:53
Sorry for the embarrassment, Cargo. I added an update.
Legalize said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:54
Oh. My. Fucking. Christ.
not even an mba said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:55
still,
BWAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH….
HAHAHAHAHA….
hahahaha.
Righteous Bubba said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:55
Sex is funny in general.
Now that I know it’s universal I think I can put all the laughter behind me.
Susan of Texas said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:56
I love hanging out with geeky smart people, so I can understand that. And your tolerance of the teasing is admirable. (So much so that I’ll refrain from the “coughing up a furball” joke I was going to make).
Cargo said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:56
haha, Gavin! Thanks. :D
I love S!N and have been reading you guys for years. There are more furries than you could possibly know, lurking in your IT departments and your datacenters. We are everywhere.
Righteous Bubba said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:57
We are everywhere.
It would be so awesome to hire a gang of furries to beat up my enemies.
Cargo said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:58
Susan of Texas - I am a weasel, not a cat!
Jennifer said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:59
Ok, not to sound narrow-minded or anything, but if there’s anything this sexual fetish for cartoon animals says to me, it’s this: we really are nearing the end of empire; decadence on this level suggests that far too many people have both too much money and too much time on their hands. I’ve got $100 that says you’d never find a subsistence farmer or hunter-and-gatherer with this type of fetish.
D. Aristophanes said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:59
Also, no offense meant to sometime commenter Simba. The image, though of this guy in his skunk suit harassing Kitchell about his WWII brother-in-arms … is just mind-blowing. To say the least.
pedestrian said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:00
As a gay man who has had to endure being lumped with Larry Craig, I sympathize with our furry friends.
serena kitt said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:02
Is this a both/and blog, like Pandagon? Because if it is, then i don’t have to decide which disturbs me more: that this guy is pressing World War Fucking II vets to swiftboat Obama, or that he’s a right-wing fetishist who enables the sex police.
Also, on general principle, i find cigars gross.
Cargo said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:02
Jennifer, humans wanting to take on the characteristics of animals is one of the oldest forms of artwork known. The hunter-gatherers were MORE furry than we are.
Righteous Bubba said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:02
I’ve got $100 that says you’d never find a subsistence farmer or hunter-and-gatherer with this type of fetish.
Um, do you know farm kids? I confess I don’t know one with this fetish, but they fuck animals. The boys anyway.
Also given the way magical thinking works you doubt some shaman dressed as a bear fucked someone?
Gavin M. said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:03
[Updated again, with a quote from CYD.]
D.N. Nation said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:03
The guy I shared a dorm room with junior year of college eventually shared it with a fellow who liked to sketch himself as a wolf with a massive package. He would then put these pictures up all over the room. The only time I visited, he had about 20 up.
I can appreciate the boldness, I guess, but…uh, no.
o'scrod said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:04
Looks like they’re trying to Swift-boat Obama, a scam that worked with Kerry because, as I’m sure you all know, Bonkerites pegged him as a liberal elitist intellectual and liberal elitist intellectuals have no cred as soldiers while Bush who evaded service is pegged as authentic everything.
If they don’t get Obama this time they will keep trying. What can Obama do to cut Karl Rove’s spore off at the pass? The Answer:
A public baptism in the Red River, Obama going full immersion while wearing a white shirt and black slacks, the preacher lowering him in face up, holding the back of his head and praying loudly some authentic sounding praises to the non-denominational Lord.
The media event of the century, delivering undenialbe cred and generating a wave of sympathy that will carry him to the summit of global power.
Subsistence Hunter said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:06
I’ve got $100 that says you’d never find a subsistence farmer or hunter-and-gatherer with this type of fetish.
You all are bloody lucky being mocked on the internet! I barely ever had enough stain to smudge a buffalo on a rock and I considered myself a king.
Frowny McBeard said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:07
Being that I have a friend who’s on Second Life as a wolf, furries make me less antsy than they used to. As long as they aren’t EbonLupus.
I will never be OK with adult babies or babyfurs, though. Not going to happen.
Your Conscience said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:08
Y’know, I’m all for making fun of this asshat for his idiotic position on Obama’s great uncle. I’m tickled to death that the 89th Infantry folks wouldn’t give him the time of day. Want to mock his wingnut ideology? Go to town!
But making fun of him for his (admittedly weird) sexual preferences? That comes too close to ad hominem for my taste.
As somebody above said, as long as it’s between consenting adults…
PS: Cargo, I salute you for being willing to argue for the other side.
r€nato said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:08
There is nothing at all gay about a guy who can’t stop talking about how much he hates queers and how much he loves a cigar in his mouth.
I repeat, that’s not at all gay so stop saying that it is!
r€nato said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:09
Well, Your Conscience, it would not be quite so mockable if he wasn’t also a troops-hating, Bush-loving, queer-hating right-winger who demands that others respect his alternative lifestyle.
The Reality-Based Dave said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:11
“I guess this gives a whole new meaning to the term rat-fucking.”
That needed a spew alert!
****************************************
“I would like to get a second source to confirm that Obama is still lying on this subject as my grandfathers, father and uncles all served in WWII, Korea and Vietnam and I don’t particularly care for politicians lying about the service of family members to further thier political agendas.”
OK. Let’s see proof that every one of his fucking elder male relatives served in battle. Every. Fucking. One.
No? None of my buisness?
FYYFF!!!*
Fairy Ruppert said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:11
With all of your reactions, I can’t wait to get home and see this. The first link is blocked by the proxy. Is it NSFW, because if it’s safe I can use the red LAN.
Susan of Texas said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:12
It is (I hope) like mocking Limbaugh for taking Viagra. ED’s not funny for guys with health problems, but I’m afraid that won’t stop me from calling him names like limp, flaccid, lackluster, and so on.
r€nato said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:12
Fairy, there is an image or two in the OMFG link which are definitely not work safe, think Goatse… a small Goatse but it is there nonetheless.
Fairy Ruppert said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:13
That comes too close to ad hominem for my taste.
Ummm…this is S,N! Ad hominem mockery is why we come here.
pedestrian said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:15
Ad hominem mockery is why we come here.
I come to meet scat fetishists. I mean, for the poop jokes
Jennifer said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:16
Well, to be fair, there are a lot of other things I am sure have never occured to your average subsistence farmer or hunter and gatherer. Like going into therapy. The only people who have enough time to worry about why they aren’t as happy as they could/should be are those that have enough to eat and a roof over their heads. And a whole list of other things: radon gas, bicycle helmets, etc etc etc. But I still say all of this stuff falls under the heading of “irrefutable signs of the end of empire”.
FupDuck said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:17
I for one welcome our new furry overlords!
not even an mba said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:17
re: CYD update.
Anxiously awaitng the General’s letter of supprt to cigarskunk.
Heterosexually yours,
not even an mba
Righteous Bubba said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:20
But I still say all of this stuff falls under the heading of “irrefutable signs of the end of empire”.
Sure. You expect your Defenders of Empire to be drawn from the pool of people who wouldn’t be burned at the state if the Empire had its way. Perhaps also from the pool of the smart and the capable, but I’m a dreamer.
Righteous Bubba said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:21
state
Of course I meant steak.
D. Aristophanes said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:23
’stayKKK’?
pedestrian said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:24
Actually, I think you meant stake
*ducks*
Righteous Bubba said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:25
*ducks*
It was my gift to you! Enjoy!
kid bitzer said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:26
as usual, people misuse the term “ad hominem”.
clearly, what we have here is “ad animalem”.
to be specific, “ad mephitem”.
Cargo said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:27
Incidentally, CYD is generally a bunch of dicks too, but even they make fun of Cigarskunk.
not even an mba said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:27
Actually I think pedestrian meant
*goose*
Gerald Curl said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:28
You know, I can live with the furry/cigar fetishes, but damn I hate grown men who wear jean shorts.
seventwentyfour said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:29
Next thing you know someone will be telling me that was actually Michelle Malkin in a feathered blonde wig playing the lead in “Farrah Fart-its.” Republicans are determined to ruin every kink out there by mere association.
Stephen Ockham said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:30
Heh, yeah. I second everything that Cargo has said.
I’m a non-active member of the fandom (ie, I don’t go to cons or dress up) and a longtime reader of SN. And I know about this guy long ago. Douche.
But really, what a cliche; the massively hyprocritical, barely-supressed homophobic raging homosexual republican wanker/pundit trope, but at least the furry part spices it up a little so it doesn’t taste like a rerun.
As odd as furries seem to the rest of you, winger-furries seem odd to us (thats right-wing furs, not Winger-fans :P, inside jokes ftw).
Simba B said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:32
I left a comment on his FurAffinity journal linking to this post.
Maybe he’ll come by and provide us with some amusement.
Sarcastro said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:32
Furries abusing rodents? Say it ain’t so!
not even an mba said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:32
GC,
I believe there actually shants.
Here’s a helpful hint:
Shants are great for people who can afford shorts, but can’t quite afford pants. .
Sarcastro said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:33
Linky no workee?
http://www.ghastlycomic.com/d/20051204.htm
not even an mba said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:33
Wordpress ate my link. That’s from Urban Dictionary.
Doctorb Freud said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:35
Sometimes a guy dressed up as a giant skunk smoking a cigar is just a guy dressed up as a giant skunk smoking a cigar.
gbear said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:36
He’s not a skunk, he’s a BEAR.
OK, pretty late to the reply to this comment, but this guy is a homophobic freak, not a bear. The gay bear movement does not have dressing up as furry animals as a defining trait (although there are probably bears in the furry groups). There are a lot of bears that are as freaky about cigars as this guy, but we don’t go visiting gay web sites and start calling everyone we disagree with conservitards, and he probably wouldn’t visit a bear website or gathering if his life depended on it. He would be a stand-out flake in any group. I hearby denounce and reject him as a bear. Yuck.
mitch said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:43
BWAHAHAHAHA!
That’s fuckin’ gold, man.
Doctorb said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:43
Jennifer, I think it comes back to Maslow’s hierarchy of needs — someone worried about digging up yams (physiological needs) isn’t going to bother with a lot of stuff like that (I think “dressing up as a skunk and getting a blowjob while sucking on a cigar” is somewhere between “love and belonging” and “self-actualization” but I’m not really sure). Probably farmers don’t have drawing-cartoons-of-themselves-fucking-animals fetishes because, you know, “hey I have a farm, and on that farm there are some animals, and if I want to have sex with animals I can make that happen, what with the advantage of knowing how to close doors and such”.
Fairy Ruppert said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:45
It’s posts like this that make me want to hit the tip jar again. This is some high quality S,N!
gbear said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:46
If I may edit myself, I’m not calling him a freak because he’s a furry, he’s a freak for being a gay-obsessed homophobe. The kind that can think of no worse insult than to call someone gay. I really hate that crap.
Righteous Bubba said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:48
Those interested in the outer limits of human depravity could do worse than read Suttree in which watermelon-fucking plays a crucial role. I look forward to Fruity conventions. Uh, not personally though.
Simba B said,
May 30, 2008 at 22:48
By the way, this is his FA journal about the whole thing. I think you have to be registered to post comments, sadly.
borehole said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:02
If you think those e-mails were bad, imagine what a nuisance cigarskunk would’ve made of himself if Kitchell had been run over by one of those construction vehicles that repaint highway dividing lines while lying face-down dressed in black.
Le hiss!
tigrismus said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:04
From Simba’s link: “Obama has kept his grandmother under lock and key since the primaries started, preventing her from talking to the media at all.” THAT KIDNAPPING BASTARD! That does it, I’m voting for McCain, he only would’ve called her a cunt.
JoshA said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:05
I honestly thought you guys were kidding at first. That is hilarious.
mat said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:06
Funniest article ever about “furries”…
dim-witted badger said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:06
fucking pelicans
and skunks
and cigars
Arky H8r of VurdPress said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:08
I can’t really add to the above snarkfest and Susan of TX’s one liners are about to kill me. But I just wanted to say that I keep two e-mail accounts. I got the second one because the username for the first one causes people to raise one eyebrow and look at me askance. Hence the second one that is just my first initial last name.
I would not send a complete stranger (and an elderly one at that) an e-mail from my personal use account because it would automatically piss them off, no matter what the content of the actual message. But then, I’m only an occasionally classy homo and not a fRightWing Virile Chomper of Cigars.
Also: Smoker’s Rights is the dumbest damn “issue” EVAR. I have never met a person who took this “issue” seriously who wasn’t a whiny assed wet shit. If I ever bitch about my RIGHT to smoke, you may assume that world peace has broken out, disease and suffering are no more and the Supreme Court has ruled that not only is every form of discrimination punishable by a punch in the face but members of groups that have suffered from discrimination must be given a million dollars.
And then someone please shoot me in the leg so I’ll have something real to bitch about.
justme said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:09
Aaaand since nobody else has…
Fuck you, I’m a dragon!
I kid because I love.
FuriousGeorge said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:09
This day is now officially better than 1000 Christmases.
Tom Hilton said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:12
Hey, could I get a third source to confirm that Obama is lying about this? Because those first two, y’know, didn’t.
Mister DNA said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:13
I’ve always thought of cigars as breath fresheners for people who eat shit.
Grand Moff Texan said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:20
No, he doesn’t want to suck a dick, does he?
Sheesh.
.
The Muppet Babies said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:21
We’re afraid. Very afraid.
r€nato said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:23
Funny how you don’t hear anybody advocating for Farter’s Rights.
Terminal Flatulence said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:23
Oh yes you do!
JK47 said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:24
Oh my god, this thread is hilarity overload. I can’t even deal with the heinous awful hilarity of it all. If you guys haven’t read the link to the “Encyclopedia Dramatica,” I highly recommend it. It contains choice excerpts like this:
Cigarskunk wrote his own Wikifur entry, where he took credit for single-handedly popularizing skunks in the furry community as if convincing a gaggle of mouth-breathing social retards to spank it to a new kind of rodent is some sort of accomplishment.
Blue Buddha said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:24
Cigar smokers don’t die. They just smell that way.
WereBear said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:25
Sometimes a guy dressed up as a giant skunk smoking a cigar is just a guy dressed up as a giant skunk smoking a cigar.
Fantastic. Because, ya tool along thinking Freud was taking things waaaay out of context… and then there’s wingers. They are so completely Freudian I feel they must lead to a academic revival of his theories.
Blue Buddha said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:26
…or Masturbate in Public Rights.
r€nato said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:29
or Blow Jobs in Men’s Rooms Rights. *tap tap tap*
Terminal Flatulence said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:29
…or Masturbate in Public rights.
Skewz me? Bill O’Reilly? Kristol? The entire rightwing punditocracy?
fadgeophile said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:30
Okay, I apologize for trying to not think furries exist.
I just have this image of people getting it on in giant sweaty mascot suits, which doesn’t suit my palate.
No offense, fellow SadlyFurries. My loyalty to the community far outweighs my ignorance to alternative lifestyles.
fadgeophile said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:32
JK47-
I clicked that link and saw no Encyclopedia Dramatica, but I did see this:
Words fail me…
R. Porrofatto said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:32
If by god he really, really likes cigars, he might also consider really really liking, or at least acquiring a taste for, cancer of the lips, tongue, mouth, throat, esophagus, larynx, lungs, pancreas, and bladder. Not to mention heart attacks, vascular disease, and emphysema. If nothing else, the hospital stays will allow him time to draw his own skunk blowjobs.
Blue Buddha said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:33
“We cum in peace. We cum for freedom.”
r€nato said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:37
I don’t know how anybody who likes to smoke cigars, ever gets any pussy without paying for it, in one manner or another - that is, either you’re rich and chicks like rich even if you’re a troll, or you have to pay a hooker to get near the va-jay-jay.
Those things STINK and they make your mouth and breath STINK.
I am so stealing that one.
Kielbasamarmot said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:38
Kielbasa, kielbasa, kielbasa, by God, I love kielbasa. My favorite color is kielbasa-red. Kielbasa smoke (the smoked kind anyway), kielbasa smell, kielbasa taste; kielbasas are fucking great. I really, really like kielbasa. Kielbasa makes my day. Kielbasas have a Zen-like quality to them, and they’re so damn good. Ooh, yes, kielbasa . I think about kielbasa all the time. I fucking love a kielbasa in my mouth.
JK47 said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:40
Okay, obviously I’m not so hot at HTML. Let’s try this again:
Encyclopedia Dramatica.
Fairy Ruppert said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:40
Cigarskunk wrote his own Wikifur entry, where he took credit for single-handedly popularizing skunks in the furry community as if convincing a gaggle of mouth-breathing social retards to spank it to a new kind of rodent is some sort of accomplishment.
ALright. I’m going to have to leave work early. This is getting to be too hilarious.
fadgeophile said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:42
S’allright, JK. That colon thing was too funny.
Smut Clyde said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:43
I don’t particularly care for politicians lying about the service of family members to further thier political agendas.
Undead Irony has risen from the grave, thirsting for human blood!
Grand Moff Texan said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:44
I’ve always thought of cigars as breath fresheners for people who eat shit.
Hence they are de rigeur in the business world.
.
Blue Buddha said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:45
Speaking of
big brown dickscigars, Happy Suck on This Day everyone!JK47 said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:46
Can you imagine someone trying to explain the concept of “furry fandom” to WWII Veteran Ray Kitchell?
Candy said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:56
In my non-smoker’s opinion, (good) cigars are marginally better smelling than cigarettes, but that is like saying cat shit smells marginally better than dogshit.
I had a landlord who smoked Swisher Sweets and the hideous stench used to come into my apartment and get in the curtains. He looked a lot like Cigarskunk. Probably a relative. Maybe even an uncle.
10,000 Perverts Who Have Otherwise Exhausted the Internet's Resources said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:57
Look folks, it’s been fun, but this makes it clear where we need to go to meet like-minded perverts.
We’re going to Ace of Spades HQ, and then we’re swinging by the Free Republic, and then we’re gonna hit up Red State and TownHall. Those motherfuckers are down for some strange.
Adios muchachos.
Smut Clyde said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:57
humans wanting to take on the characteristics of animals is one of the oldest forms of artwork known.
I believe that this is central to your point.
pedestrian said,
May 30, 2008 at 23:58
Can you imagine someone trying to explain the concept of “furry fandom” to WWII Veteran Ray Kitchell?
He should have introduced himself that way in his letter. It probably wouldn’t have gone over any worse.
steve said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:00
Funny how assholery can transcend communities. . . .
Chorizobadger said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:01
I love a sausage in the mouth as much as the next furry, but yeesh.
Susan of Texas said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:04
Remember, a sausage in the hand is worth two in the bush.
bago said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:05
The internet is made of extra win today.
Bratwurstocelot said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:06
Claiming to have invented skunk fetishism is not only kind of sad but is also much like saying Miss Mam’selle Hepzibah never existed.
Jim said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:11
Or the Uncanny X-Men.
gainsayer said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:11
I like cigars, but only platonically.
It’s true though, many cigar smokers are bourgeois golf-shorts wearing Rush-wannabe asshats.
Righteous Bubba said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:14
Or the Uncanny X-Men.
The bottom of that page asserts a link to Pogo.
Kathleen said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:16
I love how literal the handle “cigarskunk’ turned out to be.
Mister DNA said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:19
When I worked as a bartender ages ago, there was an asshole who would come in and order a Crown & Coke and then pull out a Swisher Sweet. All this was done in a conspicuous manner, so that everyone would notice the classy dude who diluted his premium beverage with flavored sugar water and smoked candy-flavored cigars. How could we not be impressed?
It should go without saying that he was a lousy tipper.
annejumps said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:22
Yeah, I dunno. For some reason, there’s a subset of furries who are about as misogynist, homophobic, racist, and crazy-libertarian as you can get (even the gay ones). I suppose the thinking is that their deviations are the only acceptable ones.
Righteous Bubba said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:23
I love how literal the handle “cigarskunk’ turned out to be.
It’s like if I went around calling myself “lazyjerk”. How stupid would that be?
(Lex) Twilly Spree(Azagthoth) said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:28
Hey, any Sadlys here around the Kansas City area? It’s Gay Pride Festival weekend. I’m going tomorrow, would love to meet up with anyone else around here! (Seriously, I would love to meet up with ANYONE around here who doesn’t go to “Jesus Camp”, Sadlys more than anyone else, as always.
“Funny how assholery can transcend communities. . . .”
Steve, you need to make up some t-shirts with that one. Brilliant, man.
Susan of Texas said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:31
How stupid would that be?
Stupid enough to pester an old veteren about a bunch of bull? Then stupid enough to get slapped around by a bunch of septuagenarians, and insist on coming back for more?
Jim said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:33
The bottom of that page asserts a link to Pogo.
Oh, no question - there’s otherwise no reason why a sexy skunk lady would be named Hepzibah.
I just meant, as far as wide exposure of the idea of a person finding a skunk sexually attractive, Chris Claremont and Walt Kelly both had cigarskunk beat by decades.
RobW said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:34
Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar. The key word here is “sometimes.”
Susan of Texas said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:35
I blame Hollywood.
Susan of Texas said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:35
hollywood
pedestrian said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:37
Seriously, I would love to meet up with ANYONE around here who doesn’t go to “Jesus Camp”,
Did I ever tell you all that I was the inspiration for that film? Well not really, but the preacher kid with the rat tail was my former pastor’s son and they shot the movie out of my old church.
RobW said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:38
Jim, not to mention Warner Bros.
Remember Pepe LePew, the cat-rapist?
pedestrian said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:41
Let’s face it, that skunk on Bambi?
H-A-W-T
Pepe Le Pew said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:42
Pepe LePew, the cat-rapist?
Prove it, SVU.
tfo said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:44
I don’t comment here, but I love Sadly, No! THIS MUCH for posts like this.
Also just because we understand CigarSkunk loves attention, he’ll be on display June 2nd and 3rd on the main page of ED.
xoxo
tfo
Righteous Bubba said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:45
Those Cute Little Bearzie Wearzies
Academic Germanic-sounding Pedant said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:45
It’s like if I went around calling myself “lazyjerk”. How stupid would that be?
I have no idea what you mean.
Mrs Tilton said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:46
Susan von und zu Texas…
I guess this gives a whole new meaning to the term rat-fucking
… wins this thread and every thread that will ever be written in the whole future history of the intarwebs.
Doctorb said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:46
I’m not a furry, but I just realized that if I were, I’d want to be named Sir Ocelot.
Blue Buddha said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:49
Here we are at almost 150 posts, and I’m surprised no one pulled out this quote yet:
“Freud said sometimes a cigar is just a cigar. Oh, yeah? Well sometimes it’s a big, brown dick with a white collar business criminal asshole sucking on the wet end of it.” — George Carlin
Sadly LYING said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:49
Sadly, No! is a bunch of lying liars; CigarSkunk made FOUR posts at CYD before he became too odious to tolerate… FOUR, not three! Why are you lying about his record?
I can now safely ignore your thesis and focus on your egregious mathematical errors. FOUR!
Smut Clyde said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:50
Furries schmurries. I’m more concerned about those Slimies who hang out at Pharyngula.
Mrs Tilton said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:51
Gbear,
he’s a freak … that can think of no worse insult than to call someone gay
Oh, I don’t now, Gbear. It would be sort of a nice world if the worst thing one could say about another is that he’s gay!
WereBear said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:53
Furries are cute.
Slimies, now, there’s a whole other story.
Which I can’t tell.
pedestrian said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:55
Slimies? Is that an amphibian fetish? Because if you ask me, salamanders are just asking for it with their bright eyes and their soft, supple skin.
Cuddlefish said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:58
And cephalopods? Mmmm, tentacles…
Righteous Bubba said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:00
Annelida, Annelida men have named you
You’re so like the creature with the mystic slime…
WereBear said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:01
Scum enchanted evening, you will meet a slime mold.
Marita said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:03
I’m guessing it’s more of a cephalopod thing, pedestrian. They do like their squid over in those parts.
And BTW pedestrian… all the other Boston Sadlys are sending me their e-mail addys… you don’t want to be left off of the cool kids list, do you? (e-mail to my screen name at mit.edu).
penispuppy said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:03
What would you call my fetish?
Smut Clyde said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:04
It occurs to me that Cigarskunk’s military enthusiasm might have been inspired by the Sensational Alex Harvey Band:
"Oh Stewardess, I Speak 'Nut" said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:05
Did someone say, ‘goose”?
http://www.mongdori.com/forums/read.php?2,1313
Evan said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:10
“I guess this gives a whole new meaning to the term rat-fucking.”
I don’t even know why there are any more posts. Susan of Texas totally won this round. Nothin but net.
LittlePig said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:17
What would you call my fetish?
Well, that gives ‘weiner-dog’ a whole new meaning.
Jennifer said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:21
What would you call my fetish?
I think I’d call it “Dick”.
Mark B said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:23
I like anthromorphic animals in comics, even sexy ones like Omaha, the Cat Dancer. Acting it out in person is a little creepy, but hey in private between consenting adults … whatever floats your boat. I think it’s revealing that he’s an outcast even among the furries.
christian aaron said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:23
As always, i just want to point out that it’s not only the “right-wing-nuts” that are doing the finger pointing traitor-calling crazy making crap. Larry Johnson’s No Quarter blog went nuts over this and every other issue the right wing has… and they’re suppposed to be Democrats. Dunno what to say except the crazy is everywhere….
Jennifer said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:24
Slimies? Is that an amphibian fetish? Because if you ask me, salamanders are just asking for it with their bright eyes and their soft, supple skin.
Maybe Hugh7 or whichever one it was will drop by and inform us about his foreskin restoration system that utilizes the soft, supple skin of the salamander. Available in many different colors and patterns!!!
JK47 said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:31
I wonder if Cigarskunk has ever gotten it on with his obvious kindred spirit, Dafyyd ab Hugh. I imagine the Wingnut Furry Blogger community must be pretty small, so they must have crossed paths at some sordid point.
I bet after sex they’d lie in plushy repose, smoking cigars and sharing a giant sammich.
fillerbunny said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:36
My vote for most disturbing post and links this decade.
George said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:36
tontocal said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:44
I took a gander of an actual pic of this ’skunk’ guy and I must say, my penis just threw up.
As long as your penis didn’t throw up a little bit in your mouth you’re OK.
Doctorb said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:36
LA LA LA I CAN’T HEAR YOU LA LA LA
MzNicky said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:37
Okay, wait just a minute here. Do I understand that these people get dressed up like animals and then have sex with each other? Like that extra-creepy scene in “The Shining”? And they have conventions? Or do they just fantasize about themselves being cartoon animals having sex with anthropomorphically “sexy” other cartoon animals? Am I gettin’ this right? And then one a these critters actually rhapsodizes on about cigars while bashing gays and then Internetually harasses an octegenarian WWII vet? What in the HELL is goin’ on here?
And you know what else? This is one of the VERY few times since I entered geezerette-hood that I’m GLAD I’m old and don’t know what the h-e-double hockey stix this is goin’ on about!! GLAD, I tells ya!!
I pray for the sweet release of death.
Jon H said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:42
By the way, it would be a nice thing if you obfuscated Kitchell’s email address in the blog post, so that spammers can’t scrape it off the page.
He’s already dealing with furries, no point adding injury to insult.
WereBear said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:42
Remember the Monty Python skit about men dressing up as mice and having cheese parties?
I remember when I thought it was a joke.
OneMan said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:46
fillerbunny! So nice to see that handle!
“The fire, it burns somehow.”
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:47
WereBear said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:42
Remember the Monty Python skit about men dressing up as mice and having cheese parties?
Yes, now that you mention it. They started the whole thing.
Alkali Bill said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:48
“He also begun publication of the furry fanzine, Skunk Aficionado, featuring 40+ full sized pages of art, comics and stories, as well as a full color 11×17″ centerfold…”
And at that point, that point, the internet was dead, as there was simply nothing left to say.
Gavin M. said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:51
[Done!]
El Cid said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:53
I am really, really, really sorry that the intertoobz ever taught me that a “furry” was some category of humans of similar interest who were common enough to rate frequent references by an abbreviated term in which common understanding of the definition was implied.
Just really, really sorry.
MzNicky said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:55
What would you call my fetish?
Arthur?
J— said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:56
By the way, it would be a nice thing if you obfuscated Kitchell’s email address in the blog post, so that spammers can’t scrape it off the page.
And I would imagine the earlier post too.
Spores and Fungus said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:57
Scum enchanted evening, you will meet a slime mold.
Species-ist!
rkrider said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:58
who was it that said, “If the right wing ever got therapy, they’d cease to exist?”
WereBear said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:00
I don’t know, but that’s brilliant!
I predict years and years of expensive Adlerian therapy.*
*MST reference
Snorghagen said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:00
The creepiest fetish I’ve ever encountered is that one where people dress up in strange costumes, assemble in large buildings, and spend all day doing pointless, repetitive tasks.
Jennifer said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:01
You know what I think is just hysterically funny?
I would like to get a second source to confirm that Obama is still lying on this subject as my grandfathers, father and uncles all served in WWII, Korea and Vietnam and I don’t particularly care for politicians lying about the service of family members to further thier political agendas.
I’m just wondering what all those manly men in his family who bravely fought in all those conflicts would think about his furry proclivities. “Sweet savior on a stick, you mean I fought for this country and narrowly escaped death many times to protect my progeny’s right to beat it to Disney characters? What the fucking FUCK!!!”
g said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:07
why isn’t he following in the footsteps of his noble family men?
Susan of Texas said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:13
The military shaves your hair, and have you ever tried to get a date looking like a naked mole rat?
FGFM said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:15
Safe for Canada!
Admissible:
1. Co-ed Sexxtasy V.2
2. Genus, No. 34
3. Here Come The Lovejoys
4. Maid in Heaven Supers VSOP
5. Secret Lovers
6. Skunk Aficionado, Issue 2
Doctorb said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:15
I think dressing up as a skunk qualifies you for a Section 8.
Fairy Ruppert said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:16
I think this is the same guy.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:17
Snorghagen said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:00
The creepiest fetish I’ve ever encountered is that one where people dress up in strange costumes, assemble in large buildings, and spend all day doing pointless, repetitive tasks.
Why do you mock my life? Waaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh!
Fairy Ruppert said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:19
He looks a lot like in this picture, so I think they’re both Sean Foltz.
Milo Johnson said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:20
Dammit, this is starting to cost me a lot of Diet Dr. Pepper as well as causing nasal pain! Seems to me this guy sounds like he should be a member of the White House press corps, or at least an unofficial member with a perpetual one-day pass and some occasional overnighters.
Mon Mothma said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:22
I think this is the same guy.
Many Bothans died to bring us this information.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:23
Caerphilly a-Gogo
x_eleven said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:23
I am one of “those people”, and I would like to “thank” Cigarskunk for stuff like this:
and this:
Learn to keep your fandom affiliation where it belongs, and stop insinuating it into areas where it is not relevant. You’re making us look really really bad here, goddamnit!
GoatBoy said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:24
This isn’t going to turn into Giant Sammch II is it? Because I refuse to apologize for hooting at those who know how much woolite gets fatty cum out of fun fur.
I just can’t.
Fairy Ruppert said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:26
Many Bothans died to bring us this information.
That article about Cigarskunk and Herb is fucking hilarious.
robert green said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:28
seriously. first i read the first paragraph. spit take. second para–spit take, cough, recover, spit take again, snarf. the update–snarf into a double spit take, soda back UP the nose and then snarfed. first comments led to some amount of vomit in my mouth. swallowed that, read cargo, felt bad, then boom, new update, blew a french fry on the way down back up into my nasal passage. got it out, thought a bit about this, spit take x3 followed by a hollow laughter that fed into a severe case of hiccups.
went to the wikifurry page. why, dear FSM, why? laughed so hard i peed someone else’s pants. spat johnny blue (probably 20 dollars worth) on my screen and keyboard.
overall, this thread has probably cost me 500 dollars and possibly my esophagus.
also, has anyone seen my sanity?
Pinko Punko said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:32
I feel like I am broken now. What is this strange world???
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:33
Your sanity is over in the corner, pointing and laughing.
Mon Mothma said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:43
Oh, MzNicky, furries are nice enough. They certainly aren’t worse than S&M aficiandos, and some of those bondage types make very good neighbors!
pedestrian said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:45
spat johnny blue
You drink Johnny Walker Blue?
Seriously?
Snorghagen said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:46
I know not, but it is rich in funk and amply endowed with the perverse and the bizarre. Let us colonize this place, and let us celebrate by copulating in peculiar ways.
tigrismus said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:47
some of those bondage types make very good neighbors!
They never help out when you need it, though: “Oh, I’m pretty sure I’ll be tied up.”
Grover StL said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:51
Sure he pines to make love with small furry animals (or as if he were an animal? I’m still not clear on this) but at least he still supports W, the war and a tasty Cuban. Leave him alone you dirty fucking hippies.
Blue Buddha said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:53
Really. While I like to keep a bottle of 12 year Macallan around, I’m not the type to just casually sip Walker’s top label.
not even an mba said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:53
Well, lots of stuff here.
1. What would you call my fetish?
I wouldn’t I here it comes when you call.
2. spat johnny blue
You drink Johnny Walker Blue?
I believe that was an euphemism. Meaning he doesn’t swallow.
Lesly said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:55
Please tell me this is coincidence and there are two Cigarpunks.
not even an mba said,
May 31, 2008 at 3:00
In a dystopian future, filled with totalitarian corporate profitocracies, the opressed have but one thing to call their own. An alternate universe of flavor country they reach by sticking flaming phallus in their mouths and suck as hard as they can. Escaping the drudgery of the everyday world into one where everyone wears leather pants and has a mohawk. It is this world that is the backdrop of the new science fiction genre cigarpunk.
The sky was the colour of a TV tuned to a show where everyon was smoking cigars.
Johnny Coelacanth said,
May 31, 2008 at 3:05
It’s cigarskunk, so no. Somewhere on the CYD message forums, Cigarskunk says he is not a furry, “he just likes collecting furry art.” He collects furry art, goes to furcons, posts on furryfandom message boards. Not a furry.
Blue Buddha said,
May 31, 2008 at 3:07
Just like he’s not gay, despite waxing poetically about sucking on a
big brown dickcigar.pedestrian said,
May 31, 2008 at 3:07
The sky was the colour of a TV tuned to a show where everyon was smoking cigars.
That’s the beginning of a Bulwer-Lytton finalist, it is.
Candy said,
May 31, 2008 at 3:10
Mister DNA said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:19
It should go without saying that he was a lousy tipper.
No surprise at all. I should mention that the landlord in question ripped me off for the deposit my mother and I paid him, after she died suddenly of a heart attack when I was four months pregnant and unemployed. (For a while there, my life was like a good ole country song.) I had left the place much cleaner than I found it, too.
He died a couple of years ago. Even though the scurrilous wrong the old bastard visited upon me happened almost 17 years ago, occasionally I think about digging him up and pissing on the remains. Anyway, Cigarskunk’s resemblance to that rat-fucker makes me loathe this rat-fucker all the more.
pedestrian said,
May 31, 2008 at 3:12
He collects furry art, goes to furcons, posts on furryfandom message boards. Not a furry.
Maybe its the same thing that keeps Larry Craig from being gay: nobody ever taps back.
Johnny Coelacanth said,
May 31, 2008 at 3:17
I suppose Mr. Skunk’s (snicker) objection is that he doesn’t dress up; he doesn’t have a fur suit. So, he’s not a furry, he just likes whacking to pictures of his favorite, Fifi Le Fume.
Lesley said,
May 31, 2008 at 3:25
I wish I hadn’t clicked on those links because I had a nice meal planned and now I’ve lost my appetite.
What a sick fuck sad sack!
Johnny Coelacanth said,
May 31, 2008 at 3:28
One more post from me. Skunky’s live journal is a thing of wonder.
Bitching about his job? Check.
Complaining about how stupid his bosses and coworkers are? Check.
Mocking his stupid, shiftless, lazy clients? Check.
The best part? He’s a social worker.