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Dekaffiyenated: Rachael Ray Terror Tie Unravels
Doop-de-doop, readin’ the Internet…
Iran fights national threat from neckties
Apparel ‘contradict the nature of culture’
May 22, 2008
WorldNetDailyIran is considering a new campaign to fend off the latest threat it has faced – men’s ties.
“Imports of some apparel are not banned but serious action should be taken to stop the import of ties which contradict the nature of Iranian culture,” Asghar Hamidi, the nation’s customs bureau deputy head, told the Fars news agency.
The wearing of ties has been banned in government offices in Iran since the 1979 Islamic revolution because it represents a “westernization” of the Iranian culture. However, before that the U.S.-backed shah had promoted ties.
Following the shah’s fall from power, members of Iran’s Basij militia would go so far as to patrol streets with scissors in order to snip ties that men were brave enough to wear, AFP said.
Never have we witnessed such absurd and backwards behavior.
Oh wait.
Dunkin’ Donuts Pulls ‘Kaffiyeh’ Advertisement
Sun, May 25, 2008 at 8:34:09 am PDTReceived from Dunkin’ Brands Customer Service this morning (along with two more hate mails from Rachael Ray fans):
Thank you for expressing your concern regarding the Rachael Ray advertisement. In the ad that you reference, Rachael is wearing a black-and-white silk scarf with a paisley design that was purchased at a U.S. retail store. It was selected by the stylist for the advertising shoot. Absolutely no symbolism was intended. However, given the possibility of misperception, we will no longer use the commercial.
They left the same note in the comments for Exurban League, where there is a serious infestation of snarling moonbats.
For more on the mainstreaming of the kaffiyeh: Where Some See Fashion, Others See Politics – New York Times.
UPDATE at 5/25/08 8:48:27 am:
As Dunkin’ Donuts pulls the ad, the idiots are snarling and ranting over here too: Crooks and Liars – Dunkin’ Dumbasses.
It’s actually a good thing this affair won’t be dragging on any longer, because there’s only one inevitable pun left unused.
Above: Dum-o!
Marita said,
May 26, 2008 at 0:12
All this talk of donuts is making me crave a maple bar. Hmmmm….
His Grace said,
May 26, 2008 at 0:18
Are you guys crazy? We can’t let Adema..Ada..Adimej—the Iranians get the edge on us in the garment wars! The commies almost made us buy our plot with all those Che Guevara t-shirts back in the 80s, but we fought back with designer jean imports to Moscow via western Europe.
bargal20 said,
May 26, 2008 at 0:20
I wish someone could convince Muslim terrorists or Mexican illegal immigrants to start wearing confederate flag bandannas. It would be fun watching wingnut heads explode.
Blue Buddha said,
May 26, 2008 at 0:22
Meghan McSame wears a
keffiyehshemagh.* crickets *
mdhatter said,
May 26, 2008 at 0:23
Paisley?
JK47 said,
May 26, 2008 at 0:25
Rachel Ray’s plan:
1. Wear black-and-white scarf
2. ???????
3. Islamofascism sweeps the globe!
Yum-o!
Principal Blackman said,
May 26, 2008 at 0:34
If only the Dunkin’ Donuts folks had told ol’ Chuckles to go pound sand….
Me said,
May 26, 2008 at 0:35
members of Iran’s Basij militia would go so far as to patrol streets with scissors in order to snip ties that men were brave enough to wear
They actually sound quite reasonable by comparison to our own loonies.
Libertarius ShadowLord said,
May 26, 2008 at 0:36
“Absolutely no symbolism was intended. However, given the possibility of misperception, we will no longer use the commercial.”
Don’t those LGF’ing idiots recognize that the company is calling them morons?
McDonalds did a “worm meat disclaimer” in the past, base on the ‘misconception’ of children’s gossip. The company is dropping the ad, not because there’s anything wrong, only because morons get worked up by it. Remove the ad and morons go back to huffing spray-on gun cleansers. Far from gaining respect from corporate america, the LGF’ing idiots have confirmed the worst expectations of Unibrow America.
Jennifer said,
May 26, 2008 at 0:36
On the plus side, in a show of support pasty Malkinites everywhere will increase their consumption of deep-fried dough, which will speed up the clogging of their arteries.
mikey said,
May 26, 2008 at 0:39
Ok. I’m starting to get it.
Some Saudis blew up a good sized chunk of New York.
So the conclusion? All muslims are evil terrorists, an implacable threat to america, apple pie and mom.
Ok. Not only are ALL muslims bad, and there’s nothing more evil you can be than muslim, but any CLOTHING you wear that might be identified with muslims makes you an evil terrorist.
What’s next? Bomb our own deserts?
Sneak into the zoos at night and poison the camels?
These people make drooling idiots look like Rhodes Scholars…
mikey
Some Guy said,
May 26, 2008 at 0:42
This has been bothering me for years. “Little Green Footballs” IS a booger joke, yes? Classy.
Well, another victory for the paranoid delusionals. I’m reminded of. “I captured a wee girl! I’m the bravest man in all England!”
mikey said,
May 26, 2008 at 0:48
Little green footballs are speed pills.
Greenies were dexedrine if I remember correctly. The dexamyl spansules were the vaunted “Brown & Clears” from the seventies. Those things were nothing short of amazing…
mikey
Lesley said,
May 26, 2008 at 0:49
if only the two sides would see how alike they are, they could merge into one powerful force of apparel banning nitwits.
J— said,
May 26, 2008 at 0:49
Is Ray some kind of double or triple agent? Is Dunkin’ Donuts some kind of front, or a front of a front? Check her out at this event wearing a red scarf. Red! You know what the message is there, right? They got tripped up with the keffiyeh, but what else have they managed slip through? Who will get to the bottom of this?
g said,
May 26, 2008 at 0:52
What message is he giving wearing that Hawaiian shirt? I’m sure if given enough time I can discover some anti-American, pro native brown-skinned person message.
g said,
May 26, 2008 at 0:53
So you follow the link to Crooks & Liars where Charles says they’re are “snarling and ranting” about it…..snarling, not so much. Laughing their asses off, yes.
Gavin M. said,
May 26, 2008 at 0:56
I switched the pic for a screen-cap, but here’s the Hawaiian-shirt image:
http://www.sadlyno.com/archives/7706.html
JK47 said,
May 26, 2008 at 0:58
I always thought “Little Green Footballs” was some sort of racist slur against Asians. Anybody?
JK47 said,
May 26, 2008 at 0:59
Why is Chazmo wearing clothes that give aid and comfort to the Aloha-fascists?
Some Guy said,
May 26, 2008 at 1:04
Aloha Akbar?
So he’s promoting either heavy drug use or eating your boogers. Strange.
mythago said,
May 26, 2008 at 1:05
Paisley is an Islamofascist symbol? Are they, too, tied into the Great Homosexual Conspiracy? I thought the homos had a deal with us Jews! How DARE they!
Libertarius ShadowLord said,
May 26, 2008 at 1:17
I thought LGF was a reference to hand grenades.
fuck ‘em, let’s call ‘em boogers and to hell with ‘em.
tigrismus said,
May 26, 2008 at 1:18
The paisley keffiyah makes me realize that each and every winter I sport a succession of warm, woolly keffiyahs for months on end. Not only that, I even have several light silky ones for warmer weather, giving me year-round keffiyah-coverage. TASTE THE TREASON.
Susan of Texas said,
May 26, 2008 at 1:19
Hawaiian are nativists who want their governenment to reflect their culture, and are therefore terrorists. Bell bottoms, peasant blouses,denim and sandals are hippie. Scarves are terrorist if they are not hanging from a ponytail. Colorful or revealing clothing is for the lower classes. And what are you left with?
The same thing Grandma and Grandpa wore.
Snorghagen said,
May 26, 2008 at 1:26
I didn’t know that.
Judging from a search on Google Groups, Johnson has been using ‘Little Green Footballs’ as a sort of brand name since at least the early 1990s – long before he got into whackaloon politics. Evidently he’s never explained the meaning of the phrase, which is understandable if it refers to speed.
SamFromUtah said,
May 26, 2008 at 1:32
So the conclusion? All muslims are evil terrorists, an implacable threat to america, apple pie and mom.
Yes, and I’ve been outraged at how this assumption is allowed to slide by just about everybody. E.g., the response to the whole “Obama’s a MUSLIM!” flap has been “Nuh-uhhh!!!” instead of “He isn’t, and even if he were, so what?”
Remember when Keith Ellison blew up congress with a suicide bomb? Neither do I, because it didn’t happen.
Not only are ALL muslims bad, and there’s nothing more evil you can be than muslim, but any CLOTHING you wear that might be identified with muslims makes you an evil terrorist.
And it can do that even if you don’t know it’s Muslim clothing! This kind of superstitious stupid is infuriating, isn’t it? Reminds me of the hysteria in the 1980s over backwards Satanic messages that would, even though incomprehensible, creep into your subconscious and turn you evil.
gbear said,
May 26, 2008 at 1:33
What’s next? Bomb our own deserts?
Here ya go, mikey!
http://www.bombpop.com/treats/Products.aspx?categoryId=1
Oh wait, that was with one ‘s’. oops.
Libertarius ShadowLord said,
May 26, 2008 at 1:34
Rules for Little Green Footballs:
#1) The Cork Stays On The Fork.
Woodrowfan said,
May 26, 2008 at 1:42
“Little Green Footballs” are hand grenades. I thought it meant boogers at first as well, especially given the “intelligence’ of the average LGF minion.
Libertarius ShadowLord said,
May 26, 2008 at 1:44
The cork stays on the fork, especially in New Y-ooo-ork.
No dork can remove the cork unless replaced with a sp-ooo-ork.
Where is that blasted fork?
In New York! In New York!
And what is on that fork?
A cork! A cork!
Who removes it?
A dork with a spork! A dork with a spork!
Morons blog and despise New York, but the cork stays on the fo-ooo-ork.
Idiots web-threaten and wave sporks at donut do-ooo-orks.
Marita said,
May 26, 2008 at 1:47
Psst… Boston-area Sadlys who are social… I’m trying to gather your e-mail addresses. So ummm… if you could e-mail me at [myscreenname] at mit.edu that would be freaking awesome.
SamFromUtah said,
May 26, 2008 at 1:47
A dork with a spork! A dork with a spork!
LOLz!
And I’m jazzed somebody liked the name “Libertarius ShadowLord” enough to use it.
Pinko Punko said,
May 26, 2008 at 1:49
Chazmo knows no decency. Check out his very low bar for his “You Are An Idiot” redirect.
Pinko Punko said,
May 26, 2008 at 1:50
Sorry that’s “You Are A Idiot”-
Pinko Punko said,
May 26, 2008 at 1:51
YES I AM close the tag, save the world
mikey said,
May 26, 2008 at 2:01
Sorry to interrupt, but it sure looks like Phoenix got down ok.
Who says we can’t do powered landings on Mars?
Um, other than history….
mikey
Smut Clyde said,
May 26, 2008 at 2:15
The rationale seems to be that in this case, the offending scarf may have been a perfectly innocuous piece of black-&-white retail therapy, but it was still necessary to create an uproar to thwart the insidious Islamic menace — otherwise Islamic headware might become mainstream, and tolerated.
I can see the point. As bargal20 alluded upsteam, no-one created enough of an uproar when people first started wearing the confederate flag, and now a symbol of treason and slavery is taken for granted.
Yay Phoenix!
Pinko Punko said,
May 26, 2008 at 2:15
Fabric, donut, coffee.
Any questions?
Amlodhi said,
May 26, 2008 at 2:22
Can we demonize the sarong next. Ok…I’ll start.
1. Brown people wear them.
2. Men wear them and THEY ARE SKIRTS11!
Blue Buddha said,
May 26, 2008 at 2:24
I bet iss ‘cuz dey dinnit use that commie metric system, an’ used the good ol’ Merikan system of measurements, like Gawd intended us too.
* spits on ground *
Lesley said,
May 26, 2008 at 2:36
Fabric, donut, coffee.
Any questions?
My mission if I choose to accept it?
Blue Buddha said,
May 26, 2008 at 2:36
This donut will self-destruct in 10 seconds.
Another Kiwi said,
May 26, 2008 at 2:54
Alright, wingnuts take an innocuous ad off air. Phoenix lands on Mars. My right eye won’t stop twitching.
Something is going on here, I just know it.
Smut Clyde said,
May 26, 2008 at 2:58
My mission if I choose to accept it?
Flying fucks are involved.
Blue Buddha said,
May 26, 2008 at 3:00
From LGF’s wiki entry:
Yep, that clinches it. I think mikey’s right that it’s a reference to drugs. If not dexedrine, then some form of blotter acid, as there are a zillion and one forms of LSD with the name of [color][shape].
Kathleen said,
May 26, 2008 at 3:01
I knew this place would be filled with tiki-dhimmis.
You won’t be allowed to drink you Mai Tai’s when the Taliban takes over.
THINK ABOUT IT
Gundamhead said,
May 26, 2008 at 3:16
Heroic Charles is fighting the good fight, all right. Although I can’t help but notice he isn’t wearing a flag pin in any of his pictures. Further, that Hawaiian shirt is kinda gay. It also raises some red flags that he looks like Ward Churchill after being drained of his life force by a demon , an undead, or perhaps a mad scientist of some sort. Double agent?
not even an mba said,
May 26, 2008 at 3:30
When the islamo-elitist revolution comes we’ll all be wearing scarves and eating Dunkin Donuts, because nothing says poncy book-readin’ college boy like donuts.
not even an mba said,
May 26, 2008 at 3:30
Well, scarves are kindy poncy.
mikey said,
May 26, 2008 at 3:34
And hey, you do enough speed, you’ll have teh secks with ANYBODY…
Um. If you can at all…
mikey
Arky H8r of VürdPress said,
May 26, 2008 at 4:02
I’m sorry, has anyone discovered why all fRight Wing guys look like shit? Not just unattractive but like they were already borderline and decided to make things worse.
I know it’s not that important but, damn!
As you were.
Tommykey said,
May 26, 2008 at 4:18
I didn’t read all the comments above, but my guess was that because green is the color of Islam, the symbolism of little green footballs was of Islam being kicked around.
Tommykey said,
May 26, 2008 at 4:24
I just e-mailed Dunkin’ Donuts criticizing them for pulling the Rachal Ray ad. I called on them not only to reinstate the ad, but to increase its usage!
SamFromUtah said,
May 26, 2008 at 4:33
has anyone discovered why all fRight Wing guys look like shit?
Part of it – by no means all – is that anybody who isn’t more than normally attractive looks out of place and weird on TV, at least to a cradle-to-middle-age American TV viewer like me.
The big question is why the hell do they keep putting these guys on TV?
whateverdude said,
May 26, 2008 at 4:39
That photo of Charles Johnson makes him look like a badly-aged version of the wife on “Little House on the Prarie”.
“Any more flapjacks, honey?”.
R. Porrofatto said,
May 26, 2008 at 5:45
It was selected by the stylist for the advertising shoot.
Obviously, the only thing left to do is hunt down that stylist and demand to see his/her countertops. Wouldn’t be surprised if the name “Hussein” was involved somehow.
(Lex) Twilly Spree(Azagthoth) said,
May 26, 2008 at 6:13
OMG…Charles Johnson was on TV? And he looks like that? Well…as if his credibility could get any lower with me according to what he writes (and the hordes of freaks he leads), well that pic actually did it. Dunkin’ Dumbass? And then some! As if his redirects of links from “hostile” sites could be any more seizure inducing (or just his lame joke of the IDF site reroute), can this guy sink any lower into the pit of scum he has created?
Well, come to think of it, his “lizards” aren’t likely to like that he even considered talking to “Commie News Network”…..HAHAHA! Now I’ll have to hear him speak…. can I possibly stand it?
(Lex) Twilly Spree(Azagthoth) said,
May 26, 2008 at 6:16
Snorhagen–he has had Little Green Footballs since the 90s? WTF did he use to write about? Zappa quotes and his bicycling? Dang, I write for 2 sites devoted to mocking his and I didn’t even know any of this, or about the grenades, nor did my co-writer at both sites, The Sphinx….we even joke about it….this is hilarious!!
Thanks, BTW.
SomeNYGuy said,
May 26, 2008 at 6:43
That Charles Johnson is one homely woman.
Tom said,
May 26, 2008 at 7:17
This is where I do all my fashion shopping. Perhaps someone can recommend it to Charles and Michelle.
http://www.neofactionapparel.com/usahome.html
Billy Joe said,
May 26, 2008 at 7:31
Charles Johnson looks like a middle aged woman. Why doesn’t he just put his hair up in a bun and get the transformation over with?
urbaniak said,
May 26, 2008 at 9:52
The anti-Western tielessness epidemic is worse than you thought.
http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c186/simonquilty/simon_reynolds_johnson.jpg
Me Again said,
May 26, 2008 at 11:33
Dunkin Donuts is now owned by the Carlyle Group. No, really! They bought it in ’06.
Arky H8r of VürdPress said,
May 26, 2008 at 13:48
When little Charlie was 11 he lived in Okinawa. One day he and some friends found a grenade and because no boy with a pulse could resist such an opportunity one of his friends pulled the pin and tossed it down a little hill.
The noise was MUCH louder than they expected so they ran, right into a soldier who screamed at them until they crapped their pants and their shoes were full of pee and the soldier was laughing too hard to keep shouting. As they squelched their away in shame they swore each other to secrecy. But little Charlie was a future fRight Winger so he went home, changed his and day dreamed he used the little green football to kill every commie in the world and the hot chicks who came to congratulate him all looked a little like his mom.
And we all lived happily until Al Gore invented the Internons which means there is nothing to shield the world from Poopypants Johnson unless someone has invented a WingNutFilter and not told me about it. Bastard.
The End
Snorghagen said,
May 26, 2008 at 16:40
No, Johnson’s use of the phrase ‘Little Green Footballs’ predates his Muslim-bashing by many years.
He used the phrase, but the blog doesn’t seem to go back that far.
Judging from comments on the Usenet, Johnson was producing some sort of software that he called Little Green Footballs as far back as the early 1990s (and maybe earlier, for all I know). I’m not sure exactly when he started his blog. The earliest mention I found of it was a few months before 9/11, though I didn’t look too hard. His site doesn’t seem to have any archives and he’s blocked out access through the Wayback Machine.
And as far as his appearance, he’s always reminded me of Whistlers Mother.
justme said,
May 26, 2008 at 18:42
I wondered about the origin of the lgf moniker some time ago. There are only three or four pills of suitable shape and color, the most obvious being prozac.
Can’t these idiots find something with at least a grain of relevance or accuracy to whinge about? Do they really need to be told that everybody in the middle east wears these things, our soldiers included?
Jeebus. That’s the kind of stupid that’ll cause a rash what leaves scars.
Doctorb said,
May 26, 2008 at 23:43
Seriously, the more these idiots go on about stupid shit like this, the better. It greatly reduces the danger of anyone taking them seriously, but it doesn’t involve stalking injured children. So nobody’s hurt, except maybe Rachel Ray, who seems to be doing just fine (and in fact I dislike her a little *less* because of this). I guess Dunkin Donuts has wasted an ad, but that’s because they’ve chosen to give a shit what crazy and stupid people say.