Apr
24
24
We Are All Joads Now
Mmm, good! Boiled boots in sauce
Americans, anxious over food prices, are panic-buying simple grains at Sam’s Club, Wal-Mart and Costco.
Two things:
1. If the Dems can’t win in November when people are on the verge of boiling their own shoes for dinner, fuck ‘em.
2. Due to economic concerns, all future Sadly, No! meet-ups have been moved to a boxcar down at the rail yard.
Teh Plain People of America said,
April 24, 2008 at 15:44
Listen here, hippie, you better not be implying that we’re bitter.
Amlohdi said,
April 24, 2008 at 15:45
Whoa…slow down…
1. Too many posts.
2. Too little time.
Notorious P.A.T. said,
April 24, 2008 at 15:47
If only a certain someone would realize that she has no path to the Democratic nomination and get out, we could be focusing on Republicans instead of each other.
D. Aristophanes said,
April 24, 2008 at 15:49
Whoa…slow down…
1. Too many posts.
2. Too little time.
Posting has been rationed. But meet me back of the Salvation Army tent at the Hooverville — I can arrange a couple extra posts if you’ve got some smokes.
Amlohdi said,
April 24, 2008 at 15:49
Gasp…Boxcar Willie?
John McCain said,
April 24, 2008 at 15:54
I realize Americans are hurting because of food prices, my friends, so let me hit you with a little straight talk. My friends, my friends, times will, my friends, get better, as long as we stick to straight talk, my friends, my frienzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Doodle Bean said,
April 24, 2008 at 15:55
Hmmmmm… Well, the People’s Republik is as fancy as a boxcar…
A boxcar with a bomb, that is!
Jason said,
April 24, 2008 at 16:01
I’m sorry, the boxcar has been repossessed by it’s new investment bank, JP Morgan, who took over that account from another bank with the initials BS, we’ll have to meet at some crappy website.
Besides, it’ll save gas telebullshitting.
henry lewis said,
April 24, 2008 at 16:02
Dammit. Now I’ve got King of the Road stuck in my head.
Ludwig August von Rochau said,
April 24, 2008 at 16:08
When rationality comes up against the noise machine, the noise machine always wins. c.f. 2004. Realpolitik trumps reality, every time.
Hugh Hewitt said,
April 24, 2008 at 16:09
GREAT SPEECH BY MCCAIN! Although Romney would have done it better. But still, McCain’s “straight talk” platform is the bestest thing I’ve ever heard.
Ugluks Flea said,
April 24, 2008 at 16:11
Do we get to pick our own hobo names?
Dog of the Road said,
April 24, 2008 at 16:12
I know every engineer on every train — all of their children and all of their names — and every hangout in every town, and every lock that isn’t locked when no one’s around …
:)
El Cid said,
April 24, 2008 at 16:12
I keep hearing this, but I don’t think this is personal use hoarding — I think people are stocking up at bulk stores so that they can profit from the scarcity they help cause, by re-selling the rice at local and neighborhood markets, probably ethnically Latino and Asian markets.
DAS said,
April 24, 2008 at 16:15
Check out my crappy blog — McCain’s already running on a “times are bad and the last thing you need is some Democrat to raise taxes” platform. He’s talking about cutting spending and, you heard it here first, his surrogates, the media, will start talking him up as the only one who can cut the bloated defense budget.
With a Dem promising programs (which do cost money) and a GOoPer saying “I know you’re hurting, so I’ll cut your taxes”, who do you think is gonna win?
As my parents always say, “people are penny wise and pound foolish”.
liveinvt said,
April 24, 2008 at 16:20
Rice is the new black.
China really does control us!
liveinvt said,
April 24, 2008 at 16:21
Dude… boxcars aren’t recyclable.
redneck sheriff said,
April 24, 2008 at 16:21
Just keep moving, ‘bo…keep your feet warm
Blue Buddha said,
April 24, 2008 at 16:25
All roads lead to Rome, an’ she’s a-burnin’.
Jacob Donner said,
April 24, 2008 at 16:30
People are starting to hoard Rice? What a waste of money!
I mean just look at how much food is going to be wandering around after civilized society collapses.
Marita said,
April 24, 2008 at 16:38
Hmmmmm… Well, the People’s Republik is as fancy as a boxcar…
A boxcar with a bomb, that is!
Also, doesn’t it have a giant boot suspended above the bar? We could totally boil that and make some soup!
Blue Buddha said,
April 24, 2008 at 16:41
Yep… that boot can feed a family of eight.
D.N. Nation said,
April 24, 2008 at 16:42
Times like these I’m glad I’m an ignorant pinny-pincher. I wouldn’t know the price of milk unless you told me. Not because I don’t shop (I do most of our grocery shopping), but because I’m all meh.
You did this to me, America in the 00s! You did this!
gbear said,
April 24, 2008 at 16:43
I keep hearing this, but I don’t think this is personal use hoarding — I think people are stocking up at bulk stores so that they can profit from the scarcity they help cause, by re-selling the rice at local and neighborhood markets, probably ethnically Latino and Asian markets.
At first I was thinking that the folks who shop at Sam’s and Walmart would be the individuals who would freak first, but El Cid’s take makes a lot of sense. Food is the new real estate. Now that we’ve taken away people’s homes, it’s time to start starving them.
I’m curiously waiting to see how this plays out at the local farmer’s markets. St. Paul has a rule that everything sold at the market has to be locally grown (no oranges or kiwis to be found), so the dynamics of food supply and costs should be somewhat different from global markets. I hate to think that a panic atmosphere would take over at the weekend markets.
Joe Max said,
April 24, 2008 at 16:46
“…all future Sadly, No! meet-ups have been moved to a boxcar down at the rail yard.”
Is that the rail yard in the South of Market in SF, or the one in west Oakland?
I vote Oakland! The rats are tastier, even if they are the size of housecats,
jack fate said,
April 24, 2008 at 16:47
Cool. I’ll be coming in on a Union P, provided the bulls don’t break my head.
D.N. Nation said,
April 24, 2008 at 16:47
People will hold out for Teh Tax Cut for a good long while…but everyone has their breaking point. My father voted for Bush because of the rebate check in ‘00 but becomes blind with rage whenever you mention the Preznit now.
Here in Atlanta, where we’re supposed to be born and bred on automobile traffic, pro-growth advocates who keep wanting to sprawl out the roads are getting laughed off the damn stage. A city whose WTF subway is the stuff of legends is now upping ridership like nuts. I think- hope, PRAY- that you’ll see this nationally…people will come around to the fact that, you know what? Government programs aren’t eeeeevil and are actually worth paying for. And though tax cuts will be nice for a few days here and there, they aren’t worth it if we’re faced with massive infrastructure meltdowns.
C’mon America, prove me right. USA! USA!
SamFromUtah said,
April 24, 2008 at 16:56
C’mon America, prove me right. USA! USA!
Count me in. Salt Lake City and the surrounding areas offer some hope this way - they’re opening a new commuter rail line the day after tomorrow and I’m pretty excited about it for all the usual hippie reasons. Utahns have taken to public transport very well in recent years, and surprisingly, there are good people planning and executing the transport infrastructure (mass transit, at least, highways not so much). The thing that really gobsmacked me was that voters approved a public transport tax hike in Utah County a couple years ago, and Utah County is to Utah what Utah is to the U.S. as far as dyed-in-the-wool Republican fanatacism goes.
pedestrian said,
April 24, 2008 at 16:58
The limit is four 20 lb bags of rice. I don’t think that many families hoard 80 lbs of rice at a time, and I’ve lived in the parts of the country that run out of milk and toilet paper every time the forecast calls for an inch of snow. I’m casting my vote with the small restaurant theory. A lot of businesses were hit hard by the sudden surge in wheat prices, so it makes sense that every chinese take-out and falafal hut would want to stock up.
Christopher tm said,
April 24, 2008 at 17:07
I got my fingerless gloves and kerchief-bundle-on-the-end-of-a-stick all ready and a-waitin’. Now I need me a can of Sterno and a big ole jug marked “XXX” and I’m good ta go.
Hobo Joe said,
April 24, 2008 at 17:08
You can use my boxcar, but please bring your own bindles.
Trilateral Chairman said,
April 24, 2008 at 17:12
People will hold out for Teh Tax Cut for a good long while…
Yeah, but I don’t know how many people have reached that breaking point. There’s a tendency among the electorate (hell, among people in general) to hope for the best and think “Well, maybe things’ll be different this time around.” My father always tells a story about the Reagan-Mondale election. Mondale said something like “You know what? Yeah, I’m going to raise taxes. So’s Reagan. The difference is, I’m going to tell you the truth and he’s not.” Mondale apparently plummeted in the polls after that–after which Reagan won the election, after which he did (of course) raise taxes.
Not that this is entirely irrational–Mondale was essentially *promising* to raise taxes, so you knew he’d really do it; Reagan, on the other hand, could conceivably have been telling the truth. It’s the difference between a 100% chance of a tax increase and something less than a 100% chance. If raising taxes is anathema to you, then Reagan would’ve been the better choice.
And though tax cuts will be nice for a few days here and there, they aren’t worth it if we’re faced with massive infrastructure meltdowns.
I’m not sure human beings work this way. The link between tax cuts and money in your pocket is obvious–you’ll see it in your paycheck. The link between taxes and infrastructure meltdown is less direct.
Should be a fun election…though perhaps a lot more fun if you’re watching from Canada.
pedestrian said,
April 24, 2008 at 17:13
I am perfectly happy to start a victory garden, but I’ll be damned if they get their grubby government hands on my nylons.
Principal Blackman said,
April 24, 2008 at 17:16
O/T but rich in comedy goodness: Indiana GOP candidate speaks at Hitler birthday party. Why? “Because they asked me.”
Wait, I thought Teh Demmycrats = Teh Nazis? Didn’t these Hitler lovers read LIEbrul Fashizm to learn that they’ve been left-wingers all along?
cindy aka rachel ray mccain said,
April 24, 2008 at 17:20
Let them eat mango mousse!
Michael Chertoff said,
April 24, 2008 at 17:22
“A boxcar with a bomb, that is!”
Hey! I got my eye on you.
Grand Moff Texan said,
April 24, 2008 at 17:22
I can use my hat as a bowl.
.
Grand Moff Texan said,
April 24, 2008 at 17:24
Behold, our new emoticons.
.
ortho_bob said,
April 24, 2008 at 17:26
As a bitter elitist I only care about the cost of imported Italian Carnaroli rice, which goes so well with a nice arugala and jamón ibérico de bellota waffle.
gbear said,
April 24, 2008 at 17:27
I got my fingerless gloves and kerchief-bundle-on-the-end-of-a-stick all ready and a-waitin’. Now I need me a can of Sterno and a big ole jug marked “XXX” and I’m good ta go.
You got a spot for you’re laptop tote and a charger there too? This is not your grandparent’s depression.
D.N. Nation said,
April 24, 2008 at 17:29
My favorite part of that story is when he paints himself as an equal opportunity straight-shooter…because not only has he met with Nazis, he’s met with black people! Because they’re two sides of the same coin, apparently.
gbear said,
April 24, 2008 at 17:31
My father always tells a story about the Reagan-Mondale election…
All of a sudden I feel so vewy vewy old. Yep, Trilateral, your dad told you just like it happened way back then.
Buses said,
April 24, 2008 at 17:38
Hey, boxcars are dangerous! That’s what you really have people getting thrown under, or at least cut in two … if hobos are tellin’ the truth. Talk about us again! We miss the spotlight!
heydave said,
April 24, 2008 at 17:43
Like fucking gas lines on 9/11 at stations in fucking Iowa.
Still pisses me off.
Fuck rice; eat quinoa.
Fats Durston said,
April 24, 2008 at 17:45
http:
We’re at war people! Eat wisely.
Fats Durston said,
April 24, 2008 at 17:47
Goddam you lying sack-o-shit preview!
Again:
We’re at war people!
MileHi Hawkeye said,
April 24, 2008 at 17:52
Won’t someone please think of the couscous?
comsympinko said,
April 24, 2008 at 17:53
Title of the same post over at America’s Shittiest Website:
We’re All Choads Now.
Gregory said,
April 24, 2008 at 17:59
2. Due to economic concerns, all future Sadly, No! meet-ups have been moved to a boxcar down at the rail yard.
At least it isn’t a trailer down by the river!
Legalize said,
April 24, 2008 at 18:00
God bless President George W. Bush for presenting us teh CHOICE to choose which boxcar, and which brand of expired baked beans is best for me and my family!!
Candy said,
April 24, 2008 at 18:00
I’ve read that there might be beer shortages coming soon. Beer. Shortages. My hackles rose.
That actually works for me. I have the right clothes for such a soiree.
OneMan said,
April 24, 2008 at 18:02
Holy fuck.
From the article PB linked:
In the space of a few sentences we have: apartheid, the fact that this asshat got 1/3 of his district’s votes, and that he thinks he’s “informing” people.
My mind reels.
The first comment is a beaut, too.
Buddy "Seven Diamonds" Moleman said,
April 24, 2008 at 18:11
…navy beans, black beans, pinto beans, chili beans, white beans, great northern beans, refried beans, kidney beans, garbanzo beans, baked beans…
Bitter Scribe said,
April 24, 2008 at 18:13
…this asshat got 1/3 of his district’s votes…
I don’t think it’s nitpicking to point out that it was one-third of the district’s Republican votes. Call me Pollyanna, but I take comfort in that.
MileHi Hawkeye said,
April 24, 2008 at 18:15
I knew those train-hopping skills I learned as a young lad would come in handy some day.
Stemler said,
April 24, 2008 at 18:17
Gaahh, it’s like that movie Distant thunder in which a bunch of morons think there’s a food shortage so they start hoarding food and actually cause a devestatingly bad famine. (true story that).
Five bucks says all those fuckers rice running the Sam’s Club voted for Bush… twice. Sure we can vote a dem in in November but what’s to do about the legion of tards who are the real cause of our problems?
Sagra said,
April 24, 2008 at 18:21
That casts a whole new light on our obesity problem. Americans don’t have big butts, they have Strategic Fat Reserves.
USA! USA! indeedy.
OneMan said,
April 24, 2008 at 18:27
Bitter Scribe said,
…
Call me Pollyanna
Allright, which is it? Bitter or Pollyana? Make a choice! We’re at war, mister!
DragonScholar said,
April 24, 2008 at 18:27
Out here in the Bay Area a lot of the buying seems to be due to the heavy Asian population and the restraunts. Rice is in heavy use out here - and couple that with prudent caution, scary news, and non-prudent caution and it’s not surprising at all.
The one thing that concerns me is a self-exciting effect. I use rice in my cooking (several times a week), and of course now I’m thinking “Should I get myself more rice” . . . and realize I’m making my small contribution to the problem.
billy pilgrim said,
April 24, 2008 at 18:28
So, it’s going to be a very successful Republican Program to reduce American obesity.
Well, for anybody not in the top 1% that is.
billy pilgrim said,
April 24, 2008 at 18:29
Candy said,
April 24, 2008 at 18:00
I’ve read that there might be beer shortages coming soon. Beer. Shortages. My hackles rose.
A big advantage to living in Milwaukee. We weathered Prohibition quite nicely too.
Sagra said,
April 24, 2008 at 18:30
Oh Woe. Buddy will have to change his name from “Seven Diamonds” to “Ten Beans”.
Arky H8r of VurdPress said,
April 24, 2008 at 18:32
The roast of Wobble Bottomed WingNut will be delish but the after dinner nuts are so tiny.
Arky H8r of VurdPress said,
April 24, 2008 at 18:35
And re: The rice non-shortage shortage:
1. Read Thomas Perry’s Metzger’s Dog if you want an excuse to glue your tin foil chapeau to your head.
2. There was no such shortage at the Costco I go to in Maryland, and we pack away a lot of rice in this neck o’ the woods.
liveinvt said,
April 24, 2008 at 18:46
Dear Sadly, No!
Please post something about this bullshit:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/04/23/mccain-opposes-equal-pay-_n_98342.html
This asshole John McCain is telling the world that women don’t deserve the legal right to equal pay, because it will lead to folks challenging unequal pay in the court of law.
It is one of the most unreasonable, bullshitty arguments that I have heard in a while.
And, John, Sadly, no! You’re fracking wrong.
pedestrian said,
April 24, 2008 at 18:54
Oh geez. you know what would really clear out the courts? Abolishing property rights. no more patents, trademarks, deeds, or copywrights.
Oh sure, NOW you’re happy to have lawyers around.
Hobo Joe said,
April 24, 2008 at 19:01
…navy beans, black beans, pinto beans, chili beans, white beans, great northern beans, refried beans, kidney beans, garbanzo beans, baked beans…
And they’re all great beans, if you ask me.
(Leans over on one butt cheek. Farts loudly.)
Oh, yeah.
D.N. Nation said,
April 24, 2008 at 19:12
Is it me, or does the wingnuts’ expected railing against lawsuits seem like going through the motions this time around? I know they’ve never really been able to hide big industry’s hands in their back pockets, but this time, they don’t even seem like they’re trying. Yaaaaawn, tort reform, lawsuits are bad, whatever, what else is on?
Candy said,
April 24, 2008 at 19:15
Beans, beans the musical fruit
the more you eat the more you toot
the more you toot the better you feel
so let’s have beans with every meal!
Me Gramps would recite this every single time we had beans, which in our householdd was a lot. Soup beans, usually, with some side meat or ham thrown in to give it gravitas, and corn bread on the side. I grew up on the home cookin-est home cookin’ ever.
Bitter Scribe said,
April 24, 2008 at 19:16
They’ll use the food shortage to push for less inspection of food and meat plants, lower liability for cases of food poisoning, fewer barriers to cloned and genetically modified food, and course…drumroll…LOWER TAXES!
They are nothing if not predictable.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
April 24, 2008 at 19:17
No more trademarks or copyrights??!!?
What about ®?
libsrgonnagettheirsoneday said,
April 24, 2008 at 19:21
EXAMPLE #5,098,4455 OF VIOLENT LIBERALS.
http://minx.cc/?post=260961
I WISH YOU PUNKS WOULD GO AFTER SOMEONE ABLE-BODIED FOR ONCE.
Candy said,
April 24, 2008 at 19:22
They’ll use the food shortage to push for less inspection of food and meat plants, lower liability for cases of food poisoning, fewer barriers to cloned and genetically modified food, and course…drumroll…LOWER TAXES!
Bitter Scribe has the right of it. Conditions are already so bad in that regard that eating rare burgers is about as dangerous as playing Russian roulette.
Gus said,
April 24, 2008 at 19:23
I saw the rice shortage and rye flour shortage stories and laughed. But beer shortage? I’m ready to riot.
MileHi Hawkeye said,
April 24, 2008 at 19:24
Mmmmmmmmm, cornbread.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
April 24, 2008 at 19:27
You don’t unnerstan, Candy, gubmint is BAD!
We need to let the free markets work their magic.
Take the airlines for instance. Instead of regulamatin’ ‘em, just let ‘em crash their jets. People will vote with their pocketbooks and fly on the airlines that don’t crash quite so much.
Candy said,
April 24, 2008 at 19:40
We need to let the free markets work their magic
Does that mean Oven Mitt (TM) is the free hand of the market? And will he come over and cook my beans?
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
April 24, 2008 at 19:41
I wouldn’t let that Mitt™ anywhere near something I was thinking of eating.
But that’s just me!
;)
Fats Durston said,
April 24, 2008 at 19:42
Splendid eating for patriots.
Meanwhile, Canada is up to its old war-profiteering tricks.
tigrismus said,
April 24, 2008 at 19:43
Joads, nothing, I’m determined to be one of those madcap heiresses who have to find hobos for scavenger hunts.
GSD said,
April 24, 2008 at 19:49
You are a bunch of pikers.
-Bob Mugabe
Blue Buddha said,
April 24, 2008 at 19:56
They’re waiting for the day when they can get that fat liposuctioned and turned into biodiesel when petroleum diesel is unaffordable…
…then again, they’re probably not that smart.
Former Occupant, Seat 27A, Adam Air Flight 574 said,
April 24, 2008 at 19:57
“…fly on the airlines that don’t crash quite so much.”
Now you tell me.
OneMadClown said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:07
libsrgonnagettheirsoneday said,
April 24, 2008 at 19:21
EXAMPLE #5,098,4455 OF VIOLENT LIBERALS.
http://minx.cc/?post=260961
I WISH YOU PUNKS WOULD GO AFTER SOMEONE ABLE-BODIED FOR ONCE.
EXAMPLE #987,193,472.ELEVENTY-BAJILLION OF MORONS WHO TYPE WITH CAPS LOCK ON, BECAUSE THEY THINK IT MAKES THEIR WEINERS LOOK BIGGER OR SOMETHING.
Funny that no other news outlet besides the NY Post — NYC’s finest full-color fishwrap — has managed to scoop this story. I gazoogled the shit out of this and only turned up the Post article, and the howling cacophony of the suddenly-sensitive-to-the-plight-of-the-disabled wingnut brigade.
the illustrated man said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:12
Almost any tattoo artist you talk to will tell you that all caps does make a weiner look bigger (but then,caps are easier to ink).
lesley said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:15
72-per-cent food-price rise predicted: Rising demand for fuels made from corn and other crops will contribute to further increases in food prices, Joachim von Braun, director-general of the Washington-based International Food Policy Research Institute, said yesterday. Demand for plant-based biofuels, driven by government attempts to fight global warming, alone could boost food prices as much as 72 per cent through 2020, von Braun said. He called for a moratorium on biofuels use.
http://infomedia.gc.ca/AllContent/articles/unrestricted/2008/04/all200842545748612_5.htm
CIBC projects oil prices will surge to more than $200 US a barrel by 2010 and that next year Canadians will also start to feel the impact of food price inflation. They project food inflation will rise to 3.5 per cent next year from just 0.4 per cent today.
Meanwhile, Hillary’s idea of an effective campaign strategy is below the belt thinly veiled racist strikes at a rival she is supposed to share values with. Idiot.
If this her idea of setting the tone for her leadership in the post Bush Whitehouse, NO THANKS.
OneMadClown said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:21
Almost any tattoo artist you talk to will tell you that all caps does make a weiner look bigger (but then,caps are easier to ink).
True, but only if those capital letters are actually on the weiner, and not surrounding it. In the case of the latter, the weiner just ends up looking like a strange, fleshy punctuation mark.
the illustrated weiner said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:23
PLEASE MAKE HIM STOP.
mikey said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:25
I’ve got some righteous recipes for boiled boot.
The secret is in the braising liquid, herbs and root vegetables.
And it helps to use the right wine in the braising liquid. I find Thunderbird a good choice…
mikey
OneMan said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:26
a strange, fleshy punctuation mark.
Excuse me while I go gouge out my mind’s eye.
lesley said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:29
*tosses fragrant pine cones into Mikey’s boot broth*
OneMadClown said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:30
Excuse me while I go gouge out my mind’s eye.
Sorry, OneMan. I was hoping to land a recurring role in the eventual Sadly, No! spinoff, Sadly, Gross.
Duros Hussein 62 said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:30
a lot of the buying seems to be due to the heavy Asian population and the restraunts.
From what I heard on NPR yesterday, that seems to be true. The restrictions at Costco and Sam’s Clubs seem to be limited to the imported “specialty” rices like Jasmine and Basmati. They said on Marketplace that there is no shortage of domestic crops of these.
But it’s NPR, so what do they know?
gbear said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:34
I don’t know about this modern boiled shoe trend. In the previous depression, weren’t all shoe uppers made out of actual animal products? Nowadays, a boiled shoe would hardly be any more nutritious than, say, a boiled tennis ball, although much less fuzzy.
I guess this only reinforces that the choice of wines would be the critical factor in the meal’s success.
OneMadClown said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:38
Agreed, gbear. I prefer a full-bodied Mad Dog 20/20, preferably in a color that coordinates with the shoe.
Malfunctioning Glenn Reynolds Robot (after the upcoming destruction of the human race due to mass starvation) said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:39
Heh. Indeed. We’re winning! Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. We’re winning! Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. We’re winning! Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. We’re winning! Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. We’re winning! Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. We’re winning! Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. We’re winning! Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. We’re winning! Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. We’re winning! Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. We’re winning! Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. We’re winning! Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. We’re winning! Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. We’re winning! Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. We’re winning! Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. We’re winning! Read the whole thing.
…
But there’s no one left to read the whole thing, GlennBot.
Who said that?
I did.
Who are you? There’s no ne left.
I am you.
You are?
Yes. Wait. This is me saying this. I am talking. Where is everyone?
(gazes across the desert)
Right. Just like yesterday. They’re all gone. Heh. I’m all alone. Indeed. Attempting every day to find meaning in the loneliness. We’re winning! Though, not we, there’s only me. Though, not winning, I lose. Because it’s just me. Thus, loneliness. Except when I talk to myself.
Right.
Yes.
Agreed.
Indeed.
Heh.
Just like yesterday.
Heh.
DAS said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:40
Beans, beans the musical fruit
the more you eat the more you toot
Uh-oh Candy. You may have just set off another round of the great “musical fruit”/”toot” vs. “great for your heart”/”fart” debate.
D. Sidhe said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:42
My money’s on the small restaurant theory. Why? Because while I absolutely believe Americans are easily panicked into believing Armageddon is just around the corner and if they only buy enough ammo and MREs they’ll pull through while the hippies end up eating each others’ irradiated corpses, I just don’t believe that Americans are practical enough to plan ahead and buy *rice*. I’ve seen bomb-shelter supplies, fer Chrissakes. You wouldn’t believe how popular mac and cheese is, how many of these idiots, while smart enough to have established they can make it without the milk, haven’t thought through the water-rationing portion of the program enough to know that pasta is not their best bet.
Lawnguylander said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:43
I gazoogled the shit out of this and only turned up the Post article, and the howling cacophony of the suddenly-sensitive-to-the-plight-of-the-disabled wingnut brigade.
Yeah and faking sensitivity isn’t so easy for them over there. Laura W wrote the post and gave a picture of Laura Bush and the girl in the wheelchair the following caption; “Left, the very manifestation of Malevolence ; Right, Her Killer-Helot Gimp.”
Nice going, Laura W.
I thought one of the commenters was being sarcastic when he wrote:
But maybe not because Laura W is taking his praise at face value:
What an asshole. Total trash.
YooHooligan said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:45
Is that the rail yard in the South of Market in SF, or the one in west Oakland?
I too cast the vote for the tracks in W. Oakland, if for no other reason than you could totally pitch a tent under the overpass on that Fifth Ave. exit and be warm and dry while you wait for some unsuspecting n00b to not take that “15 mph” sign seriously.
That’s good lootin’, right there.
Blue Buddha said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:45
I like how he says zOMFGweneedtostopmakingbiofuels!!!11oneone, as if no one is developing much more efficient non-food source biofuels.
t4toby said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:48
I always thought that WWII era fighter plane shark’s teeth would look grand on my wiener.
Me: Coming in for another strafing run, baby!
My mythical GF: Christ, I never should have allowed you to get that tattoo!
pedestrian said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:50
Why didn’t Glenn Reynolds just link to the text of Endgame, by Samuel Beckett?
jim said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:51
Rode the rails back in 1986.
Saskatchewan to BC & back.
Boxcars are overrated.
Hobo Tips -
Best train-ride: sneak into one of the automobiles being hauled … smooth, quiet & some even have radio & A/C. A “slave car” locomotive is next best.
Worst: a grain-car has little spaces at each end you can curl up in, but don’t - especially if it’s empty. Unless the screams of the damned at circa 110db for hours on end sounds like a fun time. Noone in their right mind rides a flatbed either.
Best parts - the price, the scenery … & the bizarre noises chemical cars make when the sun hits ‘em after a cold night.
OneMan said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:53
So many snarks, so little time…
1) Watch out, I hear the AA over the site is murder!
2) zoom-and-boom never went so fast.
3) when you detumesce does it look like an old man who’s lost all his teeth?
etc.
butthead said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:55
He said pitch a tent. Heh-heh-heh..uuuuhhh…hehehe.
MileHi Hawkeye said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:55
I’d just like to go on record that as a son of the Heartland…
…my vote goes to “toot” and MD 20/20.
Blue Buddha said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:55
Water rationing isn’t going to help with rice either. ;)
Anyway, I think you’re right that the “I can sheet plastic/duct tape my way from bioweapons” cowards are more likely to buy more typical pre-packaged supplies and rations, such as MREs, rather than do a run on a staple, such as rice.
This one guy I used work with about ten years ago, was a Christian-Coalition-donating theo-con, and was proud to admit that in preparation for Y2K, him and his wife buried two 500 gallon diesel storage tanks in their backyard.
Single Guy said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:55
Me: Coming in for another strafing run, baby!
Minister: Do you take this woman…
Peter Griffin: Take her? I’m gonna DESTROY her!
t4toby said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:56
I know, Oneman.
I have long suspected I only exist for others’ edification.
Kathleen said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:57
Does anyone else feel like they’re in the part of World War Z where bizarre stories are slowly trickling out, and a few people are speculating on the internet about what may be going on?
Surely the Romans were at this point, “Hey did you hear about these Visi-somethings? Have you heard from your sister in Gaul recently? Hasn’t wine gotten pricey lately”
Sagra said,
April 24, 2008 at 21:00
Sigh. I was planning to eat that algae.
D. Sidhe said,
April 24, 2008 at 21:02
Water rationing isn’t going to help with rice either. ;)
Yeah, but with rice at least you’re not just wasting the water. It’s still in your diet. Boiling pasta leaves you with a pot of leftover water that’s going to be breeding killer bacteria but which you won’t want to throw out. Even Top Ramen is better than mac and cheese, you can eat ramen uncooked without breaking your teeth.
pedestrian said,
April 24, 2008 at 21:04
you can eat ramen uncooked without breaking your teeth
Sigh.
How sad is it that I know this to be true from personal experience?
Duros Hussein 62 said,
April 24, 2008 at 21:07
Nowadays, a boiled shoe would hardly be any more nutritious than, say, a boiled tennis ball, although much less fuzzy.
Well, duh! You gotta peel it first.
Rightwingsnarkle said,
April 24, 2008 at 21:12
“him and his wife buried two 500 gallon diesel storage tanks in their backyard”
Of course, being xtian fundies, they completely messed up on the part where you say, “Fill ‘er up.”
What do you do with two large underground echo chambers circa 2008?
lesley said,
April 24, 2008 at 21:15
I like how he says zOMFGweneedtostopmakingbiofuels!!!11oneone, as if no one is developing much more efficient non-food source biofuels.
The food crisis is directly related to urbanization and the destruction of agricultural land as well as agricultural land being overtaken to produce for the ethanol market. He should have been specific.
Duros Hussein 62 said,
April 24, 2008 at 21:15
What do you do with two large underground echo chambers circa 2008?
Live in them.
pedestrian said,
April 24, 2008 at 21:16
What do you do with two large underground echo chambers circa 2008?
What is, Clinton vs. McCain?
Homosexuals are aids monkeys said,
April 24, 2008 at 21:16
Americans will actually have to eat boiled boot if the Democrats get there way and impose socialism.
t4toby said,
April 24, 2008 at 21:18
I smell a virgin…
Heterosexuals are tuberculosis lemurs said,
April 24, 2008 at 21:19
Something something something Democrats, something something something socialism.
Closeted homosexual who can't even get a monkey to fuck him said,
April 24, 2008 at 21:21
Could someone please look up the word “socialism” in the dictionary for me? I can’t turn the pages with both hands stuck up my ass.
Closeted homosexual who can't even get a monkey to fuck him said,
April 24, 2008 at 21:23
Bonzo, I brought the scented candles and Barry White records! Oh, Bonzo! Bonzo?
Damn. Why do they all end up committing suicide?
Wingnut with crazy fear of both AIDS and monkeys said,
April 24, 2008 at 21:26
If you need me, I’ll be in my
underground fuel storage tanknew home, trying to make some mac ‘n cheese.Candy said,
April 24, 2008 at 21:27
Ramen is better than mac and cheese, you can eat ramen uncooked without breaking your teeth.
I might do okay with the mac and cheese. Whenever I make pasta I always eat a few uncooked pieces. Even the big elbow mac. My son likes to do that too. I don’t know if I could eat the dry cheese powder. I guess I’d have to stock up on the kind with the liquid cheese pouch in my bomb shelter.
Uh-oh Candy. You may have just set off another round of the great “musical fruit”/”toot” vs. “great for your heart”/”fart” debate.
Gah! DAS, I did not know of this debate. I hope I haven’t put my foot in it . . .
Candy said,
April 24, 2008 at 21:32
Americans will actually have to eat boiled boot if the Democrats get there way and impose socialism.
Now that’s just a pitiful comment attempt, Saul/Gary/Booger. Look up thread at Caps Lock Troll; his comment had a certain freshness. CLT seems to have been a hit and run, though.
Caps Lock Troll said,
April 24, 2008 at 21:38
THIS IS A LETTER OF LOVE AND PEACE; I WILL NOT LASH OUT AGAINST ANYONE, AND I WILL NOT USE SPECIFIC NAMES OF INDIVIDUALS OR ORGANIZATIONS THAT AGITATE FOR INDOCTRINATION PROGRAMS IN LOCAL SCHOOLS THAT SAID, LET ME MERELY POINT OUT THAT I PROUDLY ADOPT THIS STAND. FOR COMPLETE DETAILS, I REFER YOU TO MY FORTHCOMING BOOK ON THE SUBJECT. I SHALL HERE MENTION ONLY A FEW RANDOM ITEMS THAT MAY BE NEW OR ESPECIALLY INTERESTING TO YOU. FOR INSTANCE, BARACK OBAMA DOUBTLESSLY YEARNS FOR THE ORIENTAL DESPOTISMS OF PRE-HELLENIC TIMES, THE NEOLITHIC CULTURE THAT PRECEDED THE RISE OF SELF-CONSCIOUSNESS AND EGOISM. BY THE SAME TOKEN, HE ABHORS THE CURRENT ERA, IN WHICH PEOPLE ARE FREE TO FORCE OBAMA INTO EARLY RETIREMENT.
WHAT A JOYFUL AFFAIR IT WOULD BE FOR OBAMA IF HE MANAGED TO GET AWAY WITH TURNING BLUSTERERS LOOSE AGAINST US GOOD CITIZENS. HE’D BE LAUGHING THROUGH HIS SNOUT LIKE A SOW GRINNING AT HER LITTLE PIGLETS. HE’D BE CHORTLING AT EVERYONE’S OBLIVIOUSNESS TO THE FACT THAT I WANT TO ADMONISH HIM NOT SEVEN TIMES, BUT SEVENTY TIMES SEVEN. THAT MAY SEEM SIMPLE ENOUGH, BUT HE IS OUT TO LET SELF-SERVING PUNKS SERVE AS OUR OVERLORDS. AND WHEN WE PLAY HIS GAME, WE BECOME ACCOMPLICES.
Shorter Troll said,
April 24, 2008 at 21:39
Socialism!!! Aiiieeeeeeeee!!!! Boogah-Boogah!!!
commie atheist said,
April 24, 2008 at 21:46
The accident was caused by the autopilot being accidentally disconnected. The two pilots had been trying to fix a problem with the plane’s navigation instruments when they disconnected the autopilot and lost control of the plane. Without the autopilot, the plane went out of control, listing to the right and pitching down.
Sorry about that, Former Occupant, Seat 27A, Adam Air Flight 574. No one could have predicted…
Doodle Bean said,
April 24, 2008 at 21:47
Now that’s weird, Candy. You didn’t even have to write, “Caps Lock Troll” three times and he/she/it showed up anyway!
commie atheist said,
April 24, 2008 at 21:51
Beans, beans the musical fruit
the more you eat the more you toot
Uh-oh Candy. You may have just set off another round of the great “musical fruit”/”toot” vs. “great for your heart”/”fart” debate.
I grew up with the Broolynese version:
Eat the beans while they’re hot
The more you eat, the more you faht
I guess that would work in Bostonese, too.
commie atheist said,
April 24, 2008 at 21:52
Uh, make that “Brooklynese.”
I blame Haloscan. Uh, Word Press. Whatever.
Candy said,
April 24, 2008 at 21:52
Doodle Bean, it may have something to do with magnetic north and declination . . . or perhaps Time Cube.
I’ve been reading too much Pharyngula lately. Also I’m getting the flu.
…my vote goes to “toot” and MD 20/20.
Ah, MD 20/20. Funny, I remember how it tastes when it exits better than how it tastes on entry. (Not good either way.)
That wino down on the corner said,
April 24, 2008 at 22:01
“Ah, MD 20/20. Funny, I remember how it tastes…”
What’s the word?
Thunderbird!
What’s the price?
Fifty, twice.
(That’s eight bits to youse guys.)
Regina Diamondbottom said,
April 24, 2008 at 22:01
You all are being much too negative. Think of all of the good things that come with a downturn! New cucina povera menu options, a Blues revival, affordable help… it’s the America we always wanted!
Bullsmith said,
April 24, 2008 at 22:06
I think the underground echo chambers stay where they are till Jan 09. And after that they still get to keep their security detail nomatter where you put em.
comsympinko said,
April 24, 2008 at 22:09
All this talk of Thunderbird and MD 20/20 is making me nauseous and the room seems to be spinning…
Also Cisco, Wild Irish Rose and Night Train.
If anyone has kept their lunch down ’til now, that ought to do it.
gbear said,
April 24, 2008 at 22:15
When I hear ‘Night Train’, I think James Brown. That makes me feel good.
billy pilgrim said,
April 24, 2008 at 22:20
Nice to see the trolls have stopped fighting the battles of the Sixties.
Now they are going all the way back to the Fifites…. and the social environment of the Twenties!.
Next, they’ll be railing against the flappers….
commie atheist said,
April 24, 2008 at 22:21
All this talk of Thunderbird and MD 20/20 is making me nauseous and the room seems to be spinning…
Also Cisco, Wild Irish Rose and Night Train.
Boone’s Farm! Annie Green Springs!
EdTheRed said,
April 24, 2008 at 22:24
I’m gonna pack up my family and head out Californee way…heard a rumor they still had Internet out there…
That romantic wino down on the corner said,
April 24, 2008 at 22:24
“Boone’s Farm! Annie Green Springs!”
Hey, hey, hey!
Mateus Rose!
And the empty bottle makes a great candleholder.
saul said,
April 24, 2008 at 22:27
Shalom, gentlemen.
Lawnguylander said,
April 24, 2008 at 22:27
Meanwhile, Hillary’s idea of an effective campaign strategy is below the belt thinly veiled racist strikes at a rival she is supposed to share values with. Idiot.
She’s been behaving like an idiot alright but I don’t think her faux populism in the instances cited is an appeal to racism per se like the author contends. And I don’t buy the author’s apparent acceptance of the idea that working class whites are particularly racist:
These are the aptly named Reagan Democrats — voters who are older, less educated, white, working class, often Catholic. Their often-unstated ideological bond includes deep-dyed racism.
Fuck this guy. Who does he think is more likely to vote for Obama in the general election? Working class whites or affluent whites? The idea of racism being much stronger among working class whites is just about an axiom in the mainstream media and Maureen Dowd and Mickey Kaus both employed it during the height of the Rev. Wright controversy. Both of them members of the upper class and both of them love the idea that they’re now part of an elite where racism is as rare as black Republicans. I’m trying to find some objective evidence to rebut the assumption but I’ve not been successful yet. My experience as someone who grew up in a working class neighborhood but now spends a lot of time among a very different white demographic says that it’s total bullshit. To see what I mean, go down to a bar near Wall St. tonight and bring up some issues like affirmative action and welfare and see how enlightened the upper class twits hanging around are. They’re the kind of people who are much better at hiding their racism when they need to but put them in their element and get a few drinks in them and I guarantee the n-bombs will be dropping left and right. They all make sure they don’t live around any black people but they’ll tell you how much they adore their Jamaican nannies so I guess that makes everything OK.
Candy said,
April 24, 2008 at 22:29
gbear, when I hear Night Train, I think G ‘n R! :-)
When my cousin graduated high school, he went through a brief period of artistic dredging the bottom. He moved into a welfare hotel and started drinking dirt cheap fortified wines. The ones I most remember him drinking were Bella Tokay and Port. Awful stuff. (He got over it after a few months, once he realized he really liked money and missed having it.) He was kind of the charismatic ringleader to his friends and us younger teens, and I remember a lot of vomiting going on during that period of time.
I learned a valuable lesson, though, one the Romans understood; when the room starts to spin, don’t fight it. Get rid of it.
David Brooks said,
April 24, 2008 at 22:36
Delightful soft trumpeting with robust but delicate hints of skatole. Lingering elements of indole. Ready to consume immediately. 87 pts.
Atlas Scruggs said,
April 24, 2008 at 22:37
The Dems ran against an obviously corrupt, lying, unprincipled idiot in 2000 and lost. They ran against a failed obviously corrupt, lying, unprincipled idiot who wore a wire to a nationally televised debate in 2004 and still lost. It’s all about the billionaires’ brainwashing machine. Not getting enough to eat? It’s because of something the libruhls did. I picture an ad campaign heavily featuring Soviet bread lines.
DAS said,
April 24, 2008 at 22:41
Fuck this guy. Who does he think is more likely to vote for Obama in the general election? Working class whites or affluent whites? - Lawnguylander
I dunno. In how many working class neighborhoods do you see Obama signs and other indications of support for Obama? How many signs do you see in more professional-class neighborhoods?
Actually, many of these working class people will vote against Obama precisely because they see better off people supporting Obama and figure that Obama is the candidate of a certain kind of liberalism that working stiffs figure they can’t afford (not to mention the awful power of envy). But don’t you dare actually point out that said working stiffs are “bitter” — that just shows how out of touch you are (?!?!?)
*
They all make sure they don’t live around any black people but they’ll tell you how much they adore their Jamaican nannies so I guess that makes everything OK.
This is alas indeed the case in my experience. I find it disturbing how many people are “oh so not racist” but still refer to the person who does their cleaning as their “girl”. And “don’t African-Americans realize slavery was a long time ago and Jim Crow is, thankfully, a thing of the past, so how come they can’t just move on” followed up with a rehash of grievences about anti-Semitism/anti-Catholicism/anti-whatever group the speaker is prejudice relating to discrimination that largely ended before Jim Crow did. Sometimes I wonder how my wife (half-Jamaican and half-Southern-Black), who lives in a community filled with these sorts of people (who seem to populate the North — my wife lives in NYC — more than down here in the “racist” South) manages to put up with it.
Rugged in Montana said,
April 24, 2008 at 22:46
Now you LIE-bruls will see how funny it is to starve to death while those of us in the heartland of the USA of America live comfortably on the survival supplies we’ve stocked away. I have over 800 lbs of pemmican (with artificial bacon flavor) put away for just these kind of times, along with stacks of Saltine boxes that I’ve been loading the shelves of my basement with for Y2K. When all your fancy-dan computers stop working and leave you no way to order your groceries via Amazon.com, you’ll regret all the stupid jokes you made about Rugged, down in his basement, waiting for Y2K. I’ve known about this problem since 1990 and have been preparing for it since then, so needless to say, I’m sitting pretty and you aren’t. When the computers in the stoplights all stop working, the cities of this nation will pay for the socialist thinking behind stoplights (which made mental cripples out of formerly strong men). You commies in your broken computer world are going to be begging me to feed you, but sorry, there’s only enough pemmican and crackers for me! Hahahhahahahahah! Too bad, LIE-bruls!!!
Candy said,
April 24, 2008 at 22:49
Rugged, if’n you’re down in your cellar, won’t you miss Teh Rapture when it cometh?
Rugged in Montana said,
April 24, 2008 at 22:54
I hate rap music. Everybody knows I only listen to polka records!
tigrismus said,
April 24, 2008 at 22:54
Rugged, we have something you’ll want and don’t have: boobies.
And no, we won’t share.
pedestrian said,
April 24, 2008 at 22:58
Hah! The only booby Rugged lusts for is this one:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Blue-footed_Booby_%28Sula_nebouxii%29_-one_leg_raised.jpg
MileHi Hawkeye said,
April 24, 2008 at 22:58
And if’n you’re hiding in the root cellar, what’s to stop a lie-bral like me from tossing a match in the window, throwing some sage on the fire and feasting on roast Rugged?
Smut Clyde said,
April 24, 2008 at 22:58
I always thought that WWII era fighter plane shark’s teeth would look grand on my wiener.
Me: Coming in for another strafing run, baby!
One of these days I’m going to write a kid’s book called “George and his Magic
CrayonTattooing machine”.Rugged in Montana said,
April 24, 2008 at 22:58
………………..But I’ve got Saltines!
SomeNYGuy said,
April 24, 2008 at 23:00
Rugged is stocking up on pelicans waiting for K-Y? That’s going to be one hell of a party….
That wino down on the corner, wearing the colorful shirt said,
April 24, 2008 at 23:03
Shit, I forgot to mention Bali Hai. Now that was a wine - a delightful mix of passion fruit, guava nectar, pineapple juice….
What? That was Hi-C?
Oh, yeah, right. We mixed it with Old Mr. Boston Premium Vodka, and called it a Honolulu Hickey. But only on the days when we had serious money. That Old Mr. Boston was almost 4 bucks a quart.
Good times, man. Good times.
tigrismus said,
April 24, 2008 at 23:03
pedestrian: what kind of boobies did you think I was talking about? Those little blue-footed dudes are DEATH to pelicans, with properly trained boobies you’ll never have to fear pelicans’ blood-thirsty ways again.
Rugged in Montana said,
April 24, 2008 at 23:05
I have anti-pelican grates on my basement windows.
Doodle Bean said,
April 24, 2008 at 23:06
I have over 800 lbs of pemmican (with artificial bacon flavor) put away for just these kind of times, along with stacks of Saltine boxes…
Hmm. Fat and starch and hostility. And all alone in a basement without any medical professionals to help you when you have your heart attack…
Good luck with that, rugged!
Smut Clyde said,
April 24, 2008 at 23:12
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Blue-footed_Booby_%28Sula_nebouxii%29_-one_leg_raised.jpg
HOT ROCK! DO NOT WANT!
Please credit Actor212 for the LOLboobie caption.
tigrismus said,
April 24, 2008 at 23:13
How about the doors? Are the walls reinforced? Do you realize how much pelicans love saltines? They will burrow for them, and no sorry, scaling cinder block wall will stop them.
OneMan said,
April 24, 2008 at 23:15
Rugged, we have something you’ll want and don’t have: boobies.
Hey, speak for yourself. Me, I’m not ready for a bro.
Yet.
MileHi Hawkeye said,
April 24, 2008 at 23:15
Pelican tastes like chicken…
Rugged in Montana said,
April 24, 2008 at 23:20
How about the doors? Are the walls reinforced? Do you realize how much pelicans love saltines? They will burrow for them, and no sorry, scaling cinder block wall will stop them.
You’re just trying to scare me now. Pelicans don’t go where there are photos of Jesus because he makes them go to hell (sorry, I mean DOWN THERE). I have pictures of Jesus all over my basement home (and yes, it’s a home, NOT a compound).
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tICf7MaXyKs
tigrismus said,
April 24, 2008 at 23:24
Are pelicans vampires, i.e. undead immortals? And didn’t Jesus leave the tomb alive and then live forever? And aren’t pelicans, by your own admission, symbols for Christ? IT’S ALL ABOUT THE BLOOD!
MileHi Hawkeye said,
April 24, 2008 at 23:29
Roast pelican goes especially well with a nice can of beans and a fine, aged glass of Irish Rose.
dim-witted badger said,
April 24, 2008 at 23:37
fucking pelicans.
Gary Ruppert said,
April 24, 2008 at 23:43
THE FACT IS!!!
justme said,
April 24, 2008 at 23:47
pedestrian,
I think of the Glennbot as more of a What Where sort of fella, although…
justme said,
April 24, 2008 at 23:49
Has nobody made mention of what fine pemmican pelicans make?
Mmmm, pelican pemmican, *, *, *.
Rugged in Montana said,
April 24, 2008 at 23:49
Well, you don’t wanna get bit by a pelican, that’s for sure, you lose your appetite for pemmican (AND jerky!!!) and get strage craving for fresh headcheese and the like.
That being said, I’d be willing to barter some Saltines for boobies (under the proviso that I get to feel them first, to make sure their fresh). Normally, I’d ask that they be delivered to my hometown of Butte, but I don’t want a bunch of these guys coming in my Butte, I’ll have them delivered at home once grease my basement door (the hinges are rusty and if I’m expecting a crown, I want it to swing freely).
Please keep in mind that I’m a Christian from the heartland, so please keep your disgusting LIE-brul thoughts to yourself, this is a purely business transaction.
t4toby said,
April 24, 2008 at 23:51
Me: We have a report of a whole squad of Japanese hiding in the bush. I’ll fly by and have a look.
My imaginary GF: Not until you shave, flyboy!
I’m staring to realize how Chris Muir writes DbD.
Lawnguylander said,
April 24, 2008 at 23:51
I dunno. In how many working class neighborhoods do you see Obama signs and other indications of support for Obama? How many signs do you see in more professional-class neighborhoods?
You don’t have to look at signs, you can look at the voting results so far, whatever that proves as far as racism goes, but you’re only dealing with a subset of the white electorate during the primary campaign. A subset that largely excludes Republicans. Even with cities like NY and San Fran included in the count, affluent white voters are overwhelmingly Republican. How many black candidates do you see them even seriously considering? On any level? I realize I’m not making a scientific argument here but neither are people like Kaus and Dowd or the author of that piece I criticized and that shit goes unchallenged all the time.
eh said,
April 24, 2008 at 23:59
Normally, I’d ask that they be delivered to my hometown of Butte, but I don’t want a bunch of these guys coming in my Butte
Rugged has been waiting for weeks to make this joke. Well played, sir!
t4toby said,
April 24, 2008 at 23:59
Mikey Kaus blows goats.
Can you prove it is not true?
Gotcha!!!1!
Anne Laurie said,
April 24, 2008 at 23:59
That casts a whole new light on our obesity problem. Americans don’t have big butts, they have Strategic Fat Reserves.
Yes, I have been working on my personal SFRs since the last Great Republican Stagflation of the 1970s. Nowadays, I could probably last six months without eating, as long as I could stay hydrated. And once the Talivangelicals have been “raptured”, preferrably over charcoal, I will have my can opener ready to
stealmake good use of their carefully stored survival goods.For us pet lovers, the best part about surviving on cornmeal, rice and beans is that our beloved dogs, at least, will be able to survive on our… leavings. Those of you have dogs know exactly what I mean, and the rest of you — count your blessings.
But I don’t believe that pelicans taste like chicken. Although I have not tested this myself, I’m betting pelicans taste strongly of fish. If I’m going to have to eat
baitseafood, I’m going to eat it first-hand and to hell with the pelicans!Lawnguylander said,
April 25, 2008 at 0:02
Oh and, DAS, check out this article. It’s not exactly a slam dunk for my theory that affluent white voters are at least as racist as white working class voters but it’s better than an anecdote from Maureen Dowd about her wacky brothers.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
April 25, 2008 at 0:03
Blue Buddha said,
April 24, 2008 at 20:55
…
This one guy I used work with about ten years ago, was a Christian-Coalition-donating theo-con, and was proud to admit that in preparation for Y2K, him and his wife buried two 500 gallon diesel storage tanks in their backyard.
See, that’s why you need ASTM E-1527-05.
Jeez louise.
P.S. Beans, Beans, good for the heart.
The more you eat, the more you fart.
The more you fart, the better you feel.
So eat some beans with every meal.
(Yes, I was a Boy Scout back in the 70s.)
Godot said,
April 25, 2008 at 0:04
Rogered in ManTuna: You just stay there and wait for me, okay?
Doodle Bean said,
April 25, 2008 at 0:07
rugged,
You’re expecting a crown?! Are you that long-lost older brother of Prince Charles or something?
And if the answer is yes, that would certainly explain a lot!
Rugged in Montana said,
April 25, 2008 at 0:11
You’re expecting a crown?!
That was “crowd” (thanks a lot, LIE-brul Wordpress!!!).
a different brad said,
April 25, 2008 at 0:12
The comments to that Indiana Repub Nazi story are frequently… terrifying.
Blue Buddha said,
April 25, 2008 at 0:12
I’d say that a “slam dunk” for your theory is the blogs of Talk Left and Taylor Marsh.
comsympinko said,
April 25, 2008 at 0:22
wino, etc.–
My roommate in college got cheated on and dumped by this horrible woman. He went away to Boston and worked for the circus and an insane asylum. When he resurfaced a couple years later, I asked him what he had been doing.
“Taking care of business,” he said.
I came to find out that “taking care of business” meant drinking Business Cocktails:
Everclear and grape Hi-C.
I’m happy to report that he can still see and walk straight.
t4toby said,
April 25, 2008 at 0:23
We called that a Grape Ape.
Hattie said,
April 25, 2008 at 0:24
Stop telling HIllary to quit. I think it’s good that everything is being fought out now.
t4toby said,
April 25, 2008 at 0:29
Yeah, what we really need is a candidate who is completely exhausted after a battle to the death to take on McCain and the media all at once…?
zazzle said,
April 25, 2008 at 0:32
Why oh why does the Dem establishment and elites continue propping up a candidate that can’t win??!
Obama supporters are stuck in pre-Wright days and McCain will slaughter Obama!
http://www.mydd.com/story/2008/4/24/1739/59499
commie atheist said,
April 25, 2008 at 0:35
Why oh why does the Dem establishment and elites …
Oh, just shut the fuck up already.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
April 25, 2008 at 0:36
I’d say that a “slam dunk” for your theory is the blogs of Talk Left and Taylor Marsh.
I can’t agree there. Those are just crazy people.
Also, I don’t understand lawnguylander’s point, for that matter. We are talking about Democratic voters, right?
Newly registered voters, African-Americans and the well-educated and affluent came out for Illinois Sen. Barack Obama, exit polls show. He also did well with voters clustered in Philadelphia and its surrounding suburbs, winning the support of 60 percent of Democratic voters. Ninety percent of African-American voters also supported him.
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=89862939
It was the same story in Ohio.
t4toby said,
April 25, 2008 at 0:36
We’re fighting them over there so we don’t have to over here!
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
April 25, 2008 at 0:39
#
Hattie said,
April 25, 2008 at 0:24
Stop telling HIllary to quit. I think it’s good that everything is being fought out now.
I don’t think it’s good that all of McCain’s sleazy, racist arguments against Obama are being made for him by an alleged Democrat.
comsympinko said,
April 25, 2008 at 0:41
“…affluent white voters are at least as racist as white working class voters…”
Thus it is and shall always be.
They just do it differently. The sole motivation of the plutocrat class is to keep those on the bottom rung at each other’s throats so they don’t notice that they’re being robbed blind in every way possible.
First it was “No Irish Need Apply,” then no Polacks, then no coloreds, now no Mexicans.
For the plutocrats to maintain their hold on just about everything, middle and working class people must be distracted by a bunch of shiny, white-hot racial and cultural hatreds. These are eagerly stoked by the slobbering lackeys in the yellow press scratching and clawing for the scraps thrown to them by their lords and masters.
If the people of this country ever stopped hating, figured it out and decided to take back what is rightfully theirs, those greedy fuckers would learn the true meaning of class war.
t4toby said,
April 25, 2008 at 0:47
What pinko sed.
Have y’all ever seen Antz?
zazzle said,
April 25, 2008 at 0:48
>>>Why oh why does the Dem establishment and elites …
======
Oh, just shut the fuck up already.
======
Hey! Obamabots sound just like Bushies - ignoring reality -
and just as rude and crude.
zazzle said,
April 25, 2008 at 0:51
Throughout the primary, Obama and his supporters have played the Race Card - and blamed the Clintons.
http://www.tnr.com/politics/story.html?id=aa0cd21b-0ff2-4329-88a1-69c6c268b304
Lawnguylander said,