This is the sort of thing that I’ve always dreamed the Ole Perfesser would write. But now that he’s actually written it, I’m at a loss for words. It has become completely impossible to parody this dweeb more than he already parodies himself:
IN THE MAIL: David Levy’s Love and Sex with Robots: The Evolution of Human-Robot Relationships, No doubt this will set off a storm among the narrow-minded robophobes out there. Stand up to the haters!
Glenn, we’re not “haters” – we’re “laughers.” As in, we think your obsession with downloading your brain into a robot body just so you can boink hot cyborg babes is utterly ridiculous. And thus, we’re laughing at you.
UPDATE: Oh lordy, it’s even worse than I’d imagined:
“Love with robots will be as normal as love with other humans,” Levy writes, “while the number of sexual acts and lovemaking positions commonly practiced between humans will be extended, as robots teach us more than is in all of the world’s published sex manuals combined.”
Levy goes on to imagine a world of robot prostitutes, or “sexbots,” which would offer people a chance to practice their technique before entering a human relationship. “With a robot prostitute,” he writes, “the control of disease is implicit — simply remove the active parts and put them in the disinfecting machine.”
That’s the most romantic thing I’ve ever heard. No wonder Glenn’s so eager to get it on with these cyberbabes.