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Adventures In Actual Journalism, #156,024
According to the friendly and helpful Officer Nicola Dalliday of the Bedfordshire Police Department, deranged hateblogger Lionheart is indeed to be arrested on suspicion of displaying written material contrary to Sections 18(1) and 27(3) of the Public Order Act of 1986.
Sadly, No! regrets the implication that he might have been making the whole thing up. We do, however, stand by our claim that he deliberately lied about the seriousness of the offense, as well as our claim that he is a lunatic racist dimwit who constantly uses his blog to smear an entire culture, compare dark-skinned foreigners to savage animals, and fulminate non-stop for all-out war against anyone who disagrees with his apocalyptic Christian world view.
We wish Lionheart and his attorney, a race-baiting, hate-mongering former associate of the National Front, all the best in defeating this charge, despite the fact that his guilt can be established by looking at any random entry on his website. We join Mr. Bennett in affirming that the case of his former drug-dealer client should in no way be compared with that of Samina Malik. Just as he says, she “of course” was “glorifying terrorism” with an “incitement to violence” for which “she was rightly punished”, whereas his client is a martyr of free speech who merely has “the courage to speak out against Islamist militancy and terrorism” and who should “be handed medals and bravery awards”. We hope our readers will join us in wishing this heroic man a swift and easy victory so he can go on writing about the entire Muslim religion in terms eerily reminiscent of the way Julius Streicher wrote about the Jews, as befits a true English patriot like himself.
There! That wasn’t so hard, was it? We’ll even let him have the last word:
This situation that I now face, is a situation that ever single blogger around the World now faces as we speak out against the ‘Evil’ of this generation that is calling for another Holocaust and the destruction of our civilization, the civilization in the future where our children and grandchildren reside.
I have not called for murder or bloodshed, but I have said if they want a war can we not let them have it!!
If someone wants to kill me and take my country over is it not my right to ask that question considering my life and my country is at stake?
jeff said,
January 7, 2008 at 16:45
In fairness, Sections 18(1) and 27(3) of the Public Order Act of 1986, kindof suck.
bulbul said,
January 7, 2008 at 17:04
From his blog:
I’m almost afraid to say it, but brothers and sisters, could it really be that we have found a match for the Great Swanksta?
bulbul said,
January 7, 2008 at 17:06
… on second thought, we may have uncovered the true identity of Gary Ruppert.
Jim said,
January 7, 2008 at 17:07
In other news, Ini Kamoze is being held on suspicion of glorifying gangsterism.
dBa said,
January 7, 2008 at 17:11
Is he in the UK military? Because he looks too short to fit in that uniform.
El Cid said,
January 7, 2008 at 17:14
O noez! Now dey gon arrest da TV and all them music videeos.
billy pilgrim said,
January 7, 2008 at 17:23
wow.
Actual research and stuff.
I remember when newspapers used to do this kind of thing…[wiping a tear]
Olexicon said,
January 7, 2008 at 17:28
Lionheart is pictiured with a Knight who says “nee”
g said,
January 7, 2008 at 17:29
I went to his site. Those Muslim women are throwing gang signs, aren’t they? Oooh, scarey!
What’s that red and black thing over on the right?
Legalize said,
January 7, 2008 at 17:42
“I have not called for murder or bloodshed, but I have said if they want a war can we not let them have it!!”
Using two exclamation points makes everything I’ve said twice as valid!!
J— said,
January 7, 2008 at 18:03
His attorney.
jp said,
January 7, 2008 at 18:12
Whew. That is some prime, grade-A wingnuttery going on over at Lionheart’s site.
Also kind of creepy is his hard-on for the Queen.
g said,
January 7, 2008 at 18:21
What? His lawyer is against the metric system? AND Muslims?
actor212 said,
January 7, 2008 at 18:23
What is this “journalism” of which you speak?
Senator Ted said,
January 7, 2008 at 18:24
If he goes to jail maybe they can teach him punctuation and sentence structure.
Leonard Pierce said,
January 7, 2008 at 18:28
I think my favorite thing is that he says “If someone wants to kill me and take my country over is it not my right to ask that question considering my life and my country is at stake?”, but he hasn’t actually asked a question, nor is there any indication in any of the prior paragraphs as to what question he might be talking about.
zhak said,
January 7, 2008 at 18:33
zomg! mr bennett looks like Bill Nighy’s evil twin!!
Jake H. said,
January 7, 2008 at 18:36
Actually calling the police department? This sort of thing is very poor form. You’re supposed to just sprinkle in lots of “some say”s. Also, you should really put something like “Some say he’s accused of threatening Muslims, of which Democratic U.S. Presidential hopeful Barack Obama could be one.”
Jim said,
January 7, 2008 at 18:41
Also, “my life and my country is at stake” – that’s two nouns, singular verb. Which one is he valuing at nil?
Robert M. said,
January 7, 2008 at 19:05
I wish this soul-wizened, hate-mongering cockroach all the best in his upcoming trial. It’s important to have even these guys able to speak their peace–even if only as an example of what terminal paranoid xenophobia looks like.
SamFromUtah said,
January 7, 2008 at 19:05
Leonard Pierce – there is actually a question buried in that mess, but it’s a little hard to extract –
is it not my right to ask that question [...] ?
The piss-poor punctuation and faux-archaic/formal style work together to camouflage it.
SamFromUtah said,
January 7, 2008 at 19:06
…sorry, misunderstood. I thought you were saying that that sentence was not, itself, a question. Pardon.
Righteous Bubba said,
January 7, 2008 at 19:13
Sam, that’s the meta-question. We are seeking the question wrapped within the question. CHURCHILL IN YOUR FACE.
Righteous Bubba said,
January 7, 2008 at 19:14
Look! It only took me seven minutes to not notice Sam’s self-correcting blogospheric ways!
Percyprune said,
January 7, 2008 at 19:49
It’ll be interesting to see what rhetoric the Daily Mail decides to deploy here, assuming it covers the case.
I have a basic rule that all Daily Mail readers are cnuts. As a rule of thumb it hasn’t failed me yet.
(Though to be fair, the paper has been a consistent crusader against the lunacy of Scientology. I grudgingly doff my cap to them on this one narrow issue.)
Moonbootica said,
January 7, 2008 at 20:20
Little surprise that other British right wing reactionary blogs are jumping all over this, decrying the ‘PCIslamoCommiePinko’ conspiracy.
in the British blogosphere the right wing fuckheads seem to be more prevalent, which is depressing.
they whine about how they cannot say nasty words and how the left-liberals are craven.
example here
Percyprune said,
January 7, 2008 at 20:40
Their heroes are the Richard Littlejohns and Garry Bushells of the world who parrot the Murdoch line.
If you want some entertainment read how Will Self gave Littlejohn a rhetorical kicking in a BBC radio interview several years back.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/1390395.stm
LA Confidential Pantload said,
January 7, 2008 at 21:15
Who’s the Klan-type dude in the picture? The guy with the KitchenAid headgear?
kiki said,
January 7, 2008 at 21:42
Ah, the Daily Mail. I was reading it over someone’s shoulder on the bus this morning.
In the UK news at the moment is the Norovirus, or winter vomiting bug, which is apparently afflicting tens of thousands in Old Blighty. Ask any news source and they’ll tell you that it causes diarrhea and vomiting. In the Mail today, however, was the revelation that it actually causes “uncontrollable projectile vomiting”. There’s nothing like sobre, unsensational reporting, and that was nothing like sobre, unsensational reporting!
Still, it does conjure up some pretty funny images of stereotypically staid, bowler-hatted Brits hurling all over each other from 50 feet, their facial expressions unchanging, in every office and street in the country.
And what the hell is “controllable vomiting” anyway?
El Cid said,
January 7, 2008 at 21:45
Or, why are people suddenly vomiting “uncontrollable projectiles”? Is this some new Muzliim weapon?
Righteous Bubba said,
January 7, 2008 at 21:51
And what the hell is “controllable vomiting” anyway?
Ask my kitty. Sometimes he starts making that glorp glorp noise that signals outgoing stomach goo and nothing comes of it. He can, perhaps, Save Britain.
englishwoman said,
January 7, 2008 at 22:00
Speaking of Richard Littlejohn (we were, weren’t we?), there was a game amongst the sane part of the British blogosphere to write Daily Heil-style reviews of his book.
http://preview.tinyurl.com/2l6ja9
We aren’t all insane on this side of the pond, promise.
Patkin said,
January 7, 2008 at 22:07
Personally, I hope he rots in the clink.
englishwoman said,
January 7, 2008 at 22:10
oh – you have to order the reviews by ‘most helpful first’. Otherwise it doesn’t really work.
Perhaps my personal favourite:
“Devastating. Through a series of extravagantly counterintuitive detournements, deliberate solecisms and a fresh and shocking schizoid logic, Littlejohn delicately intimates his troubled relationship with his own sexuality and his anomie in the face of a late capitalist society that has yet to afford him either respect or love. A startling account of spiritual desolation.”
Mehitabel the Abyssinian said,
January 7, 2008 at 22:36
Ask my kitty. Sometimes he starts making that glorp glorp noise that signals outgoing stomach goo and nothing comes of it.
Gets your attention, doesn’t it?
Righteous Bubba said,
January 7, 2008 at 22:51
Gets your attention, doesn’t it?
It’s fairly unwelcome attention as I tend to try to heave him towards the most cleanable area, so maybe that has something to do with his iron will. Poor Max. He did get a nice set of decorations to mangle over xmas.
Smut Clyde said,
January 7, 2008 at 22:55
[Samina Malik] “of course” was “glorifying terrorism” with an “incitement to violence” for which “she was rightly punished”, whereas his client is a martyr of free speech
Oddly enough, Samina Malik was not charged or convicted of either of those things, although her trial was used by the prosecution and the police as an exercise in mud-flinging.
Is Tony Bennett really a solicitor? Hard to believe he hasn’t been struck off.
actor212 said,
January 7, 2008 at 23:01
kiki said,
January 7, 2008 at 21:42
And what the hell is “controllable vomiting” anyway?
It’s probably the weapons-grade form of the “smart puke” some fraternities at the War College have developed.
tigrismus said,
January 7, 2008 at 23:09
“Controllable vomiting” means you can make it to a suitable receptacle in a timely fashion and under your own power.
Jim said,
January 7, 2008 at 23:34
“what the hell is “controllable vomiting
Could be a fun weekend.
Smut Clyde said,
January 7, 2008 at 23:49
Two words: Roman Shower.
Paddy Mac, Irishman from New York, said,
January 8, 2008 at 0:37
“We aren’t all insane on this side of the pond, promise.”
Hey! That’s OUR line now! Tony Blair might’ve been a warmonger, but he could construct entire grammatical sentences and deliver them, too.
moondancer said,
January 8, 2008 at 2:22
The picture: Dress uniform for Blackwater Intl.
Steve said,
January 8, 2008 at 3:39
Even better than the radio interview with Littlejohn is this review of his book in the New Statesman:
http://www.newstatesman.com/200107230051
I more or less wet myself the first time I read that.
cowalker said,
January 8, 2008 at 8:20
My son is actually a student at the same college where Rachel Corrie was a student.
I would employ every trick in the book, from worldly, detached advice to impassioned appeals to family ties to prevent him from going to Israel.
However, if he ignored me, apparently unlike conservative parents, I would not blame the college for his decision to become an activitist outside the U.S.
Chairman Meow said,
January 8, 2008 at 23:53
Steve,
Thanks, now I’ve got to find some new trousers to change into…
Israel Palestine Blogs » Blog Archive » Charles doest protest too much said,
January 30, 2008 at 0:35
[...] CJ’s tortuous condemnation of various fellow wingnuts has finaly been noticed else elsewhere in the blogosphere. From: LGF Watch in Israeli-Palestinian conflict, LGF Watch | Fatal error: Call to [...]
Mosuki said,
September 1, 2011 at 16:17
Wow,what a cool photo.
Handsome guy!