Dec
11

To Kill A TBOGG




Posted at 4:42 by HTML Mencken

Blogspot can no longer contain the somewhat popular TBOGG; teh tboggan has slid over to a new home at FDL.

Because we love, we thought this would be a great time to…well, make his head explode. So to honour TBOGG, the balance of this post will be in Canadian English, which we’ve noticed makes him bloody well annoyed when he encounters it — or approximations of it — in the leaden prose of The Jane Galt Centre’s Randroid Blogging Programme, Ye Olde Charmaine Yoest (Infection), or, especially, America’s Worst Mothre — er, Mother.

Oh, he’s wincing! Well, steady ol’ chap. Because — wot’s this, eh? — we have still more to hurt his soul! Oh yes. While it’s not meh’ul by any means, nor orchestral manoeuvres in the light or the dark, it’s a vid guaranteed to make the world’s funniest blogger hate us forever.

It’s TBOGG favorite, Aimee Mann…with Canadia’s finest rock band, Rush!

Bwahahahaha! We love you, man!

70 Comments »

  1. Ricky Fuckin Reardon from Revere said,

    December 11, 2007 at 4:46

    Subdivisions. In the shopping malls. In the backs of cars. Be cool or be cast out.

  2. Capt. Trollypants said,

    December 11, 2007 at 4:46

    I don’t get it.

  3. Jethro Tull said,

    December 11, 2007 at 4:48

    Let me sing you Songs from the Wood !!!

    … hello … ?

  4. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

    December 11, 2007 at 4:48

    HTML, shouldn’t you give a warning re: take your air sickness pills, before clicking the yout00b?

  5. The Temples of Syrinx said,

    December 11, 2007 at 4:49

    These three priests used to beat off to Ayn Rand novels inside us all day during the 1970s. Then they left.

  6. The Trees said,

    December 11, 2007 at 4:51

    That song Rush wrote about us was really stupid. The oaks are supposed to be taller than the maples. It’s just the way they are. And the maples don’t mind. Fuckin’ canucks.

  7. Righteous Bubba said,

    December 11, 2007 at 4:53

    Would Ric Ocasek wear the kind of shirt Geddy Lee is wearing? Giraffe people say no.

  8. Notorious P.A.T. said,

    December 11, 2007 at 4:53

    Candadian English? Can Marie Jon’ be far behind?

  9. Ruth Buzzi said,

    December 11, 2007 at 4:53

    that guy singing looks like me if I hadn’t eaten for 3 months and was a guy.

  10. Caveat said,

    December 11, 2007 at 4:55

    Rush? Our finest rock band? Not. Those guys used to play in the bar across the street from our place on Yonge in the early ’70s. The Gasworks. Meant we had to go farther for our jugs of watered down, overpriced draft for the week they were there. Not that we drank much in those days nudge nudge wink wink…

    The Tragically Hip is a good band today but in those days, BTO was where it was at, Hoserwise…

  11. John Lennon said,

    December 11, 2007 at 4:58

    Every fucking time Rush puts out a new record they always say that it is “getting back to the basics of good old rock and roll” compared to … the last billion albums … which presumably weren’t “good old rock and roll.” I blame Margaret Trudeau’s formerly wet vagina.

  12. John Lennon said,

    December 11, 2007 at 4:59

    oh. when I said fucking I meant to say fooking. sorry ’bout that.

  13. HTML Mencken said,

    December 11, 2007 at 5:01

    Aimee was so hot back then. I would have never told her any of that ‘hush, hush! voices carry!’ crap. I’da been all like, ‘hey baby, shout it loud.’

  14. Arky - Cthulhusexual said,

    December 11, 2007 at 5:10

    Unlike children, Rush should be heard and not seen.*

    Of course you could say that about 99.9% of the bands I like.

    *Slight ? for Neal Peart

  15. Malignant Bouffant said,

    December 11, 2007 at 5:11

    Another doubleplus suckfest. Don’t think for a minute I didn’t know better than to make that telebision screen go.

  16. Anne Laurie said,

    December 11, 2007 at 5:20

    TBogg’s been doing yeoman work from his new Borg subsite, but the comments just haven’t been up to the old TBogg standard. Something about having to click back & forth on the readmores, and then hope the hallway monitors remember your registration… by the time you scroll down all those neatly sectioned and subdivided comments, it’s kind of enervating, at least for us typists on dialup. Maybe the medium really is the message, because it’s been, well, much more polite and pausing-for-thought and inclusive and stuff, which is everything a good progressive should encourage, right?

    Ah, well, TBogg’s loss seems to have been Sadly’s gain. Maybe you guys only have cheap well drinks and taped music, but nobody has to wear a tie and jacket. Or shoes. Or pants.

  17. fardels bear said,

    December 11, 2007 at 5:25

    First, I haven’t been able to enjoy Tbogg since his move. That site freezes up my browser for some reason. And the one time I could get in, I couldn’t register for comments and leave my witty snark like, uh, this comment.

    Second, there is nothing wingnutty about Rush. Jeez, Neil writes some Randian lyrics thirty years ago and y’all won’t let him live it down. For the past 25 years he’s been writing stuff like this:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5g4mQk96Aw

    Which is pretty much an anti-capitalist rant. So leave them alone!

  18. gbear said,

    December 11, 2007 at 5:31

    TBogg’s been doing yeoman work from his new Borg subsite, but the comments just haven’t been up to the old TBogg standard.

    agreed. Right now it feels like he’s taken the blog on a mall tour. He needs to get it back into the clubs.

  19. Rightwingsnarkle said,

    December 11, 2007 at 5:38

    I’m with gbear on tbogg. I fear change.

    As for that video, what do you call a mullet when the back part’s been tied up in a ponytail? Is it still a mullet, or is it something else?

  20. g said,

    December 11, 2007 at 5:41

    So, what’s for dinner, mikey?

    Here we have chicken parmesan (chicken breasts coated with fresh breadcrumbs, browned in oil and then baked with tomatoes, basil, and parmesan) buttered noodles and swiss chard sauteed with raisins and almonds.

  21. gbear said,

    December 11, 2007 at 5:44

    I had a ham and cheese sammich. Slim pickens around here.

  22. Left_Wing_Fox said,

    December 11, 2007 at 5:45

    Here’s some more Canadian Goodness:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ty41BuLsc1A

    and

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ENN_0nrAg8

  23. mikey said,

    December 11, 2007 at 5:54

    Dammit. I’m not invested. Jane’s OK with me.

    But I click on the new TBogg, and firefox just freezes. Pukes. Dare I say it, squirts and looks for a moment of rest.

    Can’t read it, can’t comment, want to play but can’t.

    Dinner was a full on hose job. I wanted to make something pork. Took out a center cut pork chop this morning. Still frozen solid tonight. Yikes. Took out some chicken tenders, defrosted ‘em, made an Alfredo and fettuccine, dropped in some garlic and frozen peas, onions and the defrosted sauted chicken, and it all came out ok.

    Pork tomorrow, dammit…

    mikey

  24. tbogg said,

    December 11, 2007 at 5:55

    I. Hate. You. Guys.

    But thanks for all the links back to America’s Worst Mother&#153. Them was the days on the intertubes when Glenn Ryenolds was still working on his catch phrase:

    “Heh. Yo mama.”
    “Heh. I’m naked.”
    “Heh. In deep doo-doo.”
    and who could ever forget: “Heh. Things in picture may be dorkier than they appear.”

    Of such things, legends are made.

    Thanks guys.

    By the way, I’m going to have to charge you for the Glenn Reynolds stuff. Jane will send you a bill.

  25. mikey said,

    December 11, 2007 at 5:55

    Damn, g, that chard sounds righteous.

    I’ll be right back…

    mikey

  26. g said,

    December 11, 2007 at 6:03

    Chard was good. Basic recipe said toast pinenuts and saute chard and onions in olive oil, then add raisins and water to sweat.

    I didn’t have pinenuts, but I had some almonds toasted in sugar left over from making a Thanksgiving pie. So I went all sweet-and-sour like the Sicilians do, and added a tablespoon of red wine vinegar to the water that you sweat the greens in at the end.

    Came out good.

  27. Lesley said,

    December 11, 2007 at 6:05

    I’d say “it’s aboot time” except we don’t pronounce “about” that way, and FDL sucks!

    I hope the money’s good TBoooogg!

  28. Lesley said,

    December 11, 2007 at 6:10

    I didn’t think there were many wingnuts in Canada.

    atheist hasn’t been introduced to our christian fundie Prime Minister aka Little Bush.

    you’re on your way to getting rid of yours and ours is just getting started. (another good reason to move to Canada if you’re a lefty…we need all the votes we can get)

  29. Malignant Bouffant, welfare leech, said,

    December 11, 2007 at 6:11

    A) Rush sucks. Get over it, it’s 2007!!

    B) At the House of Bouffant, the ham ran out yesterday, & there are only the heels of bread left. So I chopped a couple of onion slices, grated some cheese, opened a can of tuna (feline roomie gets the juice squeezed from the can) and mixed it all up w/ mayo & Trader Joe’s Thai Yellow Curry Sauce (great stuff, all purpose!!) Would’ve added worcestershire sauce to the tuna pre-mayo & curry, but the cupboard is bare. If I decide to leave the apartment for cigarettes (instead of rolling up butts for the rest of the evening) I may go to the 99¢ Only Store as well for 20 oz. of fake Oreos for dessert. (Feline associate likes them too, she’ll lick one to death.) Only 50 minutes ’til the 99¢ Store closes. Decisions, decisions

  30. Harry Cheddar said,

    December 11, 2007 at 6:13

    I find the new TBOGG 2.0 to be cutting edge, iconoclastic, and not at all a sanitized corporate sellout. Rock on Firepups!

  31. g said,

    December 11, 2007 at 6:15

    Bouffant, you could do a killer savory bread pudding with the ham, the onions, the cheese and the heels of bread – all you’d need would be some milk and an egg.

    Fake oreos? You mean Hydrox? i loves me some hydrox cookies. they’re a guilty pleasure. Just like vienna wafers.

  32. Notorious P.A.T. said,

    December 11, 2007 at 6:25

    I didn’t think there were many wingnuts in Canada. I guess those guys are everywhere.

    They’re like roaches; they’re everywhere.

  33. gbear said,

    December 11, 2007 at 6:26

    g- There are fake Oreos that are so fake that they are fake Hydrox. Now I want some too (or else I want to be licked to death)(umm, not by you, g).

  34. Malignant Bouffant, wingnut-type-food eater, said,

    December 11, 2007 at 6:26

    No, no. Hydrox are real Hydrox, & pre-date Oreos, I b’lieve. I’m talking something made by Stauffer’s (w/ an “a,” not the Nestlé subsidiary) they’re 20 oz. for 99¢, best deal in the 99¢ store. And taste just as good as Oreos, plus the cookie part isn’t as hard.

  35. gbear said,

    December 11, 2007 at 6:30

    well live and learn.

  36. Malignant Bouffant, wingnut-type-food eater, said,

    December 11, 2007 at 6:34

    Bread pudding makes me nervous. Even if I made it, it would make me nervous. The eggs have been in the fridge for nine+ months since my mother died (I don’t like eggs, but I might want to throw them at someone, so they’re sitting next to the nine-month old yogurt; Do Not Want either.) & there aren’t many heels left. May be cheese & onions if I eat again.

  37. Malignant Bouffant, wingnut-type-food eater, said,

    December 11, 2007 at 6:37

    Sugar & lard, little chocolate flavor, that’s all that counts. But not tonight, the window of opportunity is closed.

  38. g said,

    December 11, 2007 at 6:37

    gbear, I don’t lick anyone to death. I prefer to think of my licking as rejuvenating.

  39. Malignant Bouffant, Puritan, said,

    December 11, 2007 at 6:43

    OK, food chat is icky enough (other than as a chance for me to demonstrate my lower class, unhealthy tastes in an effort to shock the hippies) let’s not enter the world of, you know, that stuff.

  40. g said,

    December 11, 2007 at 6:44

    Hey, y’all, being serious now, if you happen to be in the habit of lighting candles for a little mood or decor enhancement – do me a favor and light one for a 16 year old kid I know who’s been in a coma for 4 weeks.

    I get these email updates from time to time and got one just now.

    Kid’s family are friends of friends – we used to see them at a regular New Years Eve party we attended, but our really good friends who are the hosts moved away, and although we like all the regular guests, we are not as connected with all of them equally.

    This family are not close friends, but OTOH, we enjoy them when we see them. We heard about 2 weeks ago that their 16 year old son was suddenly and terribly stricken down with a heart attack while running on the track at his high school. He’s been in a coma ever since. After 4 weeks, they are finally weaning him off the respirator and running MRIs to see how the trauma has affected him long-term.

    Just saw they posted a new photo of him from a couple months back – wearing his hair in a mohawk for something, looking a little embarrassed and weary, like “Why do I have to pose for this picture???”

    It made me cry.

    Anyway – the family is more religious than I am, in a new age Jewish kind of way, but they and their friends are lighting candles for him. So if you happen to be lighting a candle tonight, think for a minute of ZK, and hope that he gets well.

  41. mikey said,

    December 11, 2007 at 6:55

    It’s just another reason to understand that the godlets are fulla shit.

    The world is a harsh place, if you needed me to remind you after tuberculosis and SIDS and AIDS and Cancer.

    But it’s a particularly harsh place for kids. Why? Um, well, either kids are vulnerable to all manner of risk, or god’s an asshole. Me? I’m gonna go with #1. YMMV.

    I saw lots of children give up their lives, their health and their innocence. Nothing to be gained, nothing to be earned, no upside at all. Brutal times, and people without options get spent, chewed up and spit out and wrecked and wasted and no, in case you were hoping, nothing in return.

    My own life was thrown into a crazy mess. I had to learn to be something I didn’t even want to know, and know things I never wanted to learn. And when it was all done? I didn’t know who I was, and couldn’t understand where I fit in.

    Children get torn and wasted, followed closely by women, and the sick and disabled. What do you want? A world that is fair, and honest and kind?

    Don’t know where to even look for that…

    mikey

  42. billy pilgrim said,

    December 11, 2007 at 6:57

    Why do people hate on Rush so? I mean, you don’t have to like the band, music is about taste, but boy, it’s like wingnuts near a Library….

    btw, I got an important birthday coming up on wednesday, I could use a simple classy, no fuss meal for the lady…. mikey (anybody else?) – got any suggestions?

  43. g said,

    December 11, 2007 at 7:04

    What’s the lady like? Is she vegan, meat-eater, picky, adventurous – what?

  44. porgy tirebiter said,

    December 11, 2007 at 7:06

    No no no no no no NO NO. This is impossible. I refuse to believe it. Lalalalalalalalalalala….

  45. Lesley said,

    December 11, 2007 at 7:06

    *directs billy pilgrim to Brad’s romantic dinner service.*

    I recommend the Italian, heavy on the alcohol.

  46. gbear said,

    December 11, 2007 at 7:07

    g- a candle has been burning here all evening. It is now dedicated.

  47. mikey said,

    December 11, 2007 at 7:08

    billy.

    Two words.

    Carbonara. French bread. Red wine.

    Ok, that’s more than two words.

    But it’s easy, delish and one dish…

    mikey

  48. gbear said,

    December 11, 2007 at 7:10

    porgy tirebiter

    ‘He’s SO good with the servants.’

    Thanks. I’m going to have your theme song in my head for days now.

  49. Malignant Bouffant said,

    December 11, 2007 at 7:13

    Well, I hope he pulls through. Sounds like he’s improving. And those young people can usually pull through this sort of thing better than we aging wretches. Saw on the tube recently a woman in her thirties who had a heart attack, was oxygen deprived & comatose, & her husband eventually decided to take her off the respirator. She woke up &, while not in perfect shape, seems to be on the road to recovery.

    Hell, I used to help a woman cheat on her husband & she’d been in an accident that put her in a coma for several weeks, & was pretty much normal afterward, though I didn’t know her before the accident. (Except that her husbnd was English, & helped in her rehab, leading to her using some English turns of phrase on occasion.)

  50. baba durag said,

    December 11, 2007 at 7:17

    g: candle lit. good thoughts flowin’.

  51. ahem said,

    December 11, 2007 at 7:18

    I’d say “it’s aboot time” except we don’t pronounce “about” that way, and FDL sucks!

    sore-ry. (You do say ‘sore-ry’. But I have a thing for Canadian accents. Even Newfies.)

    and g, good thoughts your way.

  52. g said,

    December 11, 2007 at 7:23

    Kewl, gbear.

    billy – here’s something easy and cheap and impressive.

    Whole roast chicken, roast potatoes and salad.

    Go to the grocery store and buy a whole chicken. They’re usually in a wrapper marked Foster Farms and they’re about 3 pounds. [or you can spend more and get an organic or kosher one.] At Vons you can buy them for 99 cents a pound when they’re on sale.

    Buy some potatoes, a sweet onion, and another vegetable – maybe a pepper, or a zuchinni, or mushroom. Buy a bag of baby salad greens.

    Get yourself a pyrex baking pan. Or a foil one you buy at the store. Spray it with spray oil, or rub it with oil or butter. Turn your oven on to 500F.

    Take the chicken out of the wrapper, get the guts out and throw them away. Rinse it inside and out. Use some paper towels to dry it off.

    Get a lemon, cut it in quarters and stuff them into the cavity. Or an orange, if you don’t have a lemon. Put a garlic glove in there, too. Or some chunks of onion. Also some herb leaves – whatever you have.

    Salt and pepper it. Put it in the baking pan breast up.

    Cut some potatoes into chunks. Maybe some onions, too. Or some red or green bell peppers. Or some zucchini. Strew these around and alongside the chicken.

    Put the chicken in the hot oven, legs first. After 10 minutes,open the oven. Stick a wooden spoon with a long handle into the cavity and kind of shake the chicken around to make sure it’s not sticking to the bottom of the pan. Stir the vegetables. Turn the pan 90 degrees (sideways). Put it back in.

    Take it out after another 45 minutes.

    Let it rest on the cutting board. While it’s resting, make a nice green salad with the freshest veggies you can get. If you’re not creative, then buy a bag of baby green and some little grape tomatoes. Buy some nice croutons or some toasted walnuts or something else to give a little crunch. If you like it, crumble up some bleu or goat cheese, or cube up some ordinary mozzarella.

    Make – DON’T buy – a salad dressing. Put 1-2 tablespoons of vinegar in a little dish. Add a teaspons or so of Grey Poupon or other dijon mustard, salt and pepper. Mix it up with a fork. Add in about 4 tablespoons of really good olive oil.

    Carve the chicken and serve with the roasted veggies and the salad with the vinaigrette.

    Perfect with red or white wine. Good with beer. Fine with Coke, milk, Hawaiian Punch or Kool Ade,

    Ice cream for dessert.

  53. g said,

    December 11, 2007 at 7:25

    Oh, and like mikey said – french bread. Good to sop up the juices.

  54. Paddy Mac said,

    December 11, 2007 at 8:03

    If you guys would actually, um, listen to the most recent Rush album (which, BTW, was released in 2007, not 1977) you’d hear one slam after another against organized religion. Mr. Peart said that it came from his travels, which took him across the American South. He came back scared, and resolved to do what he could to stop the fundies. Sound familiar?

  55. g said,

    December 11, 2007 at 8:26

    f you guys would actually, um, listen to the most recent Rush album

    Sorry. With all due respect .I’m too old.

    Going to be now, y’all. Billy, try the roast chicken. Everyone else, light a candle for ZK.

    Catch you tomorrow.

  56. Malignant Bouffant, despiser of Rush, said,

    December 11, 2007 at 9:56

    It doesn’t matter if the lyrics are anti-religious, they’re bound to be awkward, ar best, & the music still sucks. Hell, a lot of hippie-dippie, acoustic, sensitive music (well, maybe not a lot) has good lyrics, but I’m still not listening to that crap. Next thing you’ll be telling me to give the Eagles®™ another listen.

  57. Thers said,

    December 11, 2007 at 9:59

    Sorry. With all due respect .I’m too old.

    I’m too young.

  58. Doug Watts said,

    December 11, 2007 at 10:19

    Neil Peart is gaii.

  59. bob said,

    December 11, 2007 at 15:11

    Rush sucks. Ass. Lots of ass. Neil Peart sucks. Ass. Lots of ass. Geddy Lee sucks MAJOR ass. Alex Lifeson also sucks ass. LOTS of ass. Rush lovers can go suck ass together. Have I told you how much ass Rush sucks?

  60. Nimrod Gently said,

    December 11, 2007 at 16:00

    Aimee looks a lot healthier 20 years ago.

  61. Brando said,

    December 11, 2007 at 17:02

    People will never learn that Rush grow stronger with each disparaging word and Ayn Rand reference. They feed on negative criticism like a Japanese garbage monster about to destroy a polluted Tokyo. And they still kick ass.

    That said, I am glad that wasn’t the video of the rapping skeleton from “Roll the Bones.” That one’s more embarrassing than catching your parents having sex.

  62. billy pilgrim said,

    December 11, 2007 at 18:05

    Thanks for the food ideas.

    Brando and me, roaming the internets, defending Rush from the heathenocity.

    Candles lit for ZK.

  63. Caveat said,

    December 11, 2007 at 18:47

    Here’s a quick and easy birthday dinner:

    Blanch some leeks (the first few inches from the bottom up, cut off the root end) for a few minutes, then while hot pour on some olive oil and lemon juice or vinegar, a bit of salt and pepper. You can add some chopped red peppers or capers if you like. Chill, that’s your salad served on some radicchio or romaine. Easy peasy. You can use asparagus if you don’t like to take a leek.

    For dinner, get a few nice big shrimps, frozen are fine, saute them in butter with lots of garlic, put aside.

    Make a fresh tomato sauce – chopped tomatoes (deseeded and peeled if you feel like it), You can use canned too. Saute chopped red onions, black olives, lemon peel, anchovy paste (about a tsp) you can throw in some chopped blanched bacon if you like. Add chopped tomatoes. Cook for about 20 minutes or so until it’s mushy, then add some pressed fresh garlic (my Italian friends always adds garlic at the end, he says it makes the flavour better). You can make all this a day ahead and keep it in the fridge.

    Cook some green fettucini.

    Put the tomato sauce on, put a few of the shrimps on top, grate some Reggiano over all and serve with some nice wine and garlic bread. Yum. Quick and easy.

    For dessert, fruit salad, whatever is fresh with some lemon yogourt (Liberty Mediterranean is the best) on top makes a nice fresh dessert. You can have a few cookies if you like, sugar cookies or cat’s tongues or something.

    And more wine.

  64. Batocchio said,

    December 11, 2007 at 20:30

    Good lord! Run away, Aimee!

  65. Kevin Hayden said,

    December 12, 2007 at 0:00

    g: Sorry. With all due respect .I’m too old.

    Thers I’m too young.

    I’m too impeccable in my tastes, and Rush doesn’t taste anything approximating a chicken. Boiled chicken sphincter is better.

  66. Gordon Lightfoot said,

    December 12, 2007 at 0:10

    Joni, KD, Neil, Celine and I plan a benefit for TBOGG’s basket houndies. It’ll be called The Wreck of the FiFi Fitzgerald Concert. We heard they nearly drowned recently in some slinky mood poodles.

  67. Mehitabel the Abyssinian said,

    December 12, 2007 at 1:12

    Boiled chicken sphincter?!
    [performs happy-joy dance].

  68. HTML Mencken said,

    December 12, 2007 at 20:09

    TBOGG loves Aimee Mann, hates Rush. That’s why I included the video.

    As for me, since I’m a person with Bad Taste, I’ve always liked Rush.

    But all that’s neither here nor there. What sucks is that Andrew Fucking Northrup has done such a bangup job of labeling Rush as Randroid that it’s become a cliche. But in point of fact, Neil Peart hasn’t been a Randroid since the late 70′s — listen, for instance, to “The Big Money” from 85′s Power Windows LP and tell me it’s straight from the heart of McArdleville. All Northrup knows is that 2112 is an Anthem rip-off, ergo Rush is perpetually Randroid just like, since three or four early Zeppelin songs referenced Tolkien, their entire oeuvre must be in homage of the fucking Hobbit. But then, I suppose they teach such methods of extrapolation at Groton (or was it Phillips Exeter?) and Harvard.

  69. Evan said,

    December 13, 2007 at 20:22

    Thank you, HTML.

    What he said.

  70. Sadly, No! » Britain’s Worst Mothra Mothre Mother said,

    February 21, 2013 at 12:49

    [...] been a while since we left a flaming bag of poop on our pal TBogg’s doorstep, but we couldn’t help tweeting the author of the [...]

Leave a Comment

  • Things of Interest

  • Meta Goodness

  • Clunkers

  • httpbl_stats()