2
Fun With Other People’s Religions (Dep’t Of Corrections)
Between episodes of screaming at Muslims…
I told you you had one chance left to even prove you were part of the human race. The site does open, it’s not my fault you’re totally incompetent. Click on it again, you lying sack of pork infested, goat fucking, woman hating piece of shit.
Oh, and your comments will be moderated so if you want any face time, any publicity, anything, then you better clean up your act or you’ll flat out be banned instead of just edited. You’ve run out of chances. And I won’t hesitate to report you to our FBI, even though you’re in India. Got it asswipe? Keep in mind YOU came to MY blog and started the name calling shit and it’s obvious you can dish it out but you’re nowhere near man enough to take it.
Go ahead and report me, dickwad. While you’re at it, moron, prove the violence you claim I threatened. Haha–you can’t because I didn’t. Just keep in mind you came to MY blog and started YOUR shit–and I have the entire record.
…Miss Beth informs us that Miss Beth’s Stomping Grounds isn’t actually the main blog for the purpose of making fun of her:
It’s so nice when people give me publicity…even if they can’t be bothered to 1) follow directions to go to the main blog site and 2) don’t have the balls to go to the main blog site and 3) get their panties in a wad because they can’t stand the plain unvarnished facts and 4) when the actual author goes to their place to discuss things rationally with Gavin, still go after me, personally.
And we wonder why the country is fucked up?
Well, no, we actually stopped wondering that awhile ago.
By the way, it’s not muslims I hate–it’s islam–learn the difference, morons. EDIT–neither muslim nor islam is capitalized on purpose. DUH!
Above: We love Miss Beth but hate racist lunatics!
And, while reading the sewer filth coming out of your comment lines, I have never commented on your site–even though you seem to think I did. Why don’t you show me where I allegedly commented? While you’re at it, why don’t you compare writing styles between me and Ben? It’s obvious we’re two different people, even if you aren’t able to tell the difference. Sane people can tell the difference.
Well, fair’s fair, and we stand corrected. Apparently Ben — with whom we’ve been having a perfectly nice, civil discussion in comments — is actually ‘dajjal,’ who posts with Beth at Miss Beth’s Stomping Grounds, while Beth also posts with Ben, under the name ‘Ben,’ at Miss Beth’s Victory Dance, but posts alone at Miss Beth’s Workshop, with Ben (as ‘Ben’) and others at Take Our Country Back, and with some of the same other people, but not Ben, at Wake Up America. Ben also posts at Crusader’s Armory, Moderate Muslims for Peace(!?), and Islam Exposed, while Miss Beth also posts at StopHerNow, and The Victory Caucus. And by the way, oh my God, it’s this guy again.
The weird thing is that I’m positive I’ve missed a couple, and this isn’t even the same nest of Beths we usually make fun of:
I don’t know Beth, they can’t seem to comprehend that there’s more than one Beth on the planet.
[...]
And gavin I am Beth from Blue Star Chronicles. The woman who has this blog is also Beth, but a different Beth. We are friends and we both just happen to have the same first name. That doesn’t mean we are the same person. We are two different people. Are you able to understand that or do I need to type it slower to let it sink in?
Lady, you all need to type slower!
The corrections continue. We said earlier:
As with all known members of this particular interlocking axis of whoopingly-insane right-blogs (who are these people, and why are they taking up half the Internet?) there’s stunningly irrational stuff everywhere you look…
And someone — his name, ‘Ben,’ leads us to suspect it was Ben — replied:
“half the internet” is a wild exaggeration for which I invite you to provide some substantiation.
We checked, and he’s correct:
Above: The Internet (Inset: the Miss Beth™ family of blogs)
But there are a few things we can add as well, and here’s one of them. Beth writes:
How interesting none of you idiots can read a post, feel the only thing you can quote is [Old Testament] (show me [New Testament], moron) and can’t be bothered to go to the main site.
Why don’t you go get laid and relieve some of the stress off your micro brain while I go peruse some interesting cartoons by Lars. And flush another holy book.
I guess we’ll work on getting laid later, but as NickM notes, here’s Jesus from Luke 19:27:
But these enemies of mine, who did not want me to reign over them, bring them here and slay them in my presence.
Better flush us a Codex Sinaiticus too, Beth. You might want to hook yourself up with of those wide, industrial toilets with the extra whoosh.
Update: Whoa Nellie, I don’t know if she can even get a toilet this big.
[Hanx! J—]
Marita said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:16
For those of you who weren’t reading the last comment thread: GO VOTE!!!square root of 121!!!
TomMil said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:17
The names “Beth” and “Ben” are apparently the new pointy white hood.
tb said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:22
Being willfully half-literate doesn’t count as “on purpose”.
sophie brown said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:24
I didn’t know you could get a Ph.D. in paralegal studies.
SamFromUtah said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:24
neither muslim nor islam is capitalized on purpose. DUH!
More crypto-eliminationism - she’s destroyed their capitals.
Athenawise said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:25
She celebrated Islamofascism Week by removing the capital function from her keyboard.
roy edroso said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:26
I think they saw Kevin Drum’s “worst blog posts of all time” solicitation, and dreamed of the kind of publicity money can’t buy.
Their ability to spiel out acres of outrage over teensy-tiny points is positively Goldsteinian. Might they be a front organization?
TomMil said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:31
I’ve submitted a definition to the Urban Dictionary
Beth
An internet handle for any number of drooling, half-witted, racist bloggers.
Beth said, “…it’s not muslims I hate–it’s islam–learn the difference, morons.”
Source: TomMil, New Jersey
It’s under the review of the Editors
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:33
Gavin, perhaps you need to use a lighter touch.
;)
Kathleen said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:33
Does she get paid every time you “go to the main site”? wtf?
saul said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:35
The term Islamo-fascism perfectly describes the agenda of Iran and al-queda. Their goal is to establish a world wide Islamic caliphate, the goal of Nazi Germany was to establish a world wide German Empire. The end result of each would be very much the same, the entire world ruled by a fascist regime.
Lawnguylander said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:37
I think you wanted the first link to point to this post.
And further down in that comment Miss Beth lays out the wingnut version of free speech:
Kathleen said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:38
Lawnguy that is priceless.
mikey said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:39
Man. Ugly, snarling, defensive AND stupid. And wearing ignorance and hatred with a kind of pride I haven’t seen since Skokie.
Do you suppose they use that bitter, snarling tone because they know in their heart they are wrong? Because it’s kind of a weird response to a suggestion that tolerance and peaceful coexistence might be a better, more sustainable way to live than wholesale destruction and eternal warfare.
I mean, if you can get mad about that, bitterly, hatefully angry about NOT killing people and wrecking their shit, what does it ultimately say about who you are and whether I’d want to be your neighbor…
mikey
t4toby said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:39
Wow, a nest full of hornets with imaginary stingers.
Will you watch where you’re walking, Gav? Now thete’s a swarm of hornets around, pretending that they’re stinging things.
I’m, like, so totally annoyed.
And, TomMil: Kudos! (Whatever the fuck that means)
Kathleen said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:39
Saul - I think that McDonald’s wants to establish world-wide regime of Happy meals. Do you oppose Hambo-fascism? why not? Do you hate our freedoms?
El Cid said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:40
.????? ? ??
??? ???? ??? ????? ?
??? ???? ???? ????? ?????.
??? ??? ????? ????? ??? ?????? ?????? ??? ??? ??????? ?????? ?? ????.
?????? ???? ??? ? ??! ???? ???????? ?????!
Galactic Dustbin said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:44
Is she that “God’s Warrior” woman from that wife swap show? She seems to have the same sort of in need of Ridalin style of freeform communications.
Tim said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:46
I’ll bet “Saul” is really “Paul”
Galactic Dustbin said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:50
It’s so nice when people give me publicity…even if they can’t be bothered to 1) follow directions to go to the main blog site
Poor site design is NOT a badge of honor.
Hoosier X said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:50
Why do I get the feeling that debating with beth, beth or beth would be a lot like the debates I have when I’m baby-sitting my 4-year-old nephew and it’s time for bed.
Kitty say no!
Nicky, be reasonable, I don’t think the kitty is that adamant about you staying up longer considereing you tried to cut off his whiskers and then tried to ride him down the stairs.
Poop! Hee hee hee! Butt! Hee hee hee!
phleabo said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:50
So, you’ve completely fabricated this “Beth” person and her multiple personalities?
t4toby said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:52
I love it when “conservatives” say things like:
This is sort of equivalent to saying that the Catholics and Mormons want to establish a worldwide Christian Church together.
Don’t bother learning anything beyond what you are spoon fed, “rabbi”. I understand how hard the googles are to use.
But just in case you want a hint, try putting ‘compare sunni shia’ into Teh IntetOObz, and see what comes out. Who knows, you might learn something?
Hoosier X said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:55
Looks like she made an excursion to Big Lots and bought some commas, too. If somebody woul just explain to her the difference between hyphens and long dashes …
This is America! We speak English here, woman!
Lex said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:57
Wow, Beth is a great find. I hate to seem like I’m competing, but I found my own new wingnut moron last night. Actually, he found me on YouTube to tell me what a useless liberal loser I am…LOL.
I don’t know how to put links in here, but I just know that you folks here at Sadly, No, will not be able to resist the horror of Mr. L and his Tavern:
http://mrltavern.podbean.com/
His promo video is really just that horridly hilarious.
El Cid said,
November 2, 2007 at 20:58
Ana asif.
Marhaba, Beth. Kayf haalik? Ana bekhair.
Kalimaatik madhahhukaan.
t4toby said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:01
El Cid has gone off the deep end.
mikey said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:02
Ok, who runs this goddam blog?
You? Ok, listen up, funny boy. I never posted on your silly blog. I post under the name “mikey”. The mikey that posts on this piece of shit site is some other dude. That should be freakin obvious to anybody with half a brain, moron. Why you can’t tell the flippin difference between mikey and mikey I don’t know. Are you being intentionally obtuse? Does it somehow serve your homo agenda to pretend not to be able to tell the difference? Jeez, this is the worst thing that’s happened to me since an hour ago when my coffee got cold. I got so pissed I threw the cup against the wall and had to go out in the parking lot and scream at the people passing by for a good twenty minutes. But this. This is unbelievable…
mikey (this one, not that one that isn’t me even thought you have trouble telling the difference because you are a moron)
J— said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:02
show me [New Testament]
Pick your passage.
kiki said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:03
“Click on it again, you lying sack of pork infested, goat fucking, woman hating piece of shit.”
A sack of a piece of shit?
Beth is a pile of a load of dumb.
El Cid said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:05
Here we have, in sum, the entire New Right / Reaganite style which has dominated U.S. politics for the last 30 odd years.
Goat Fucker said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:06
I never considered myself particularly smart or anything, but after reading some of that funny talk from beth, I feel like a genius.
Maybe I should get a BA in biology to go along with my PhD in Economics?
J— said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:06
Apparently Ben…is actually …while Beth also posts with…. And by the way, oh my God, it’s this guy again.
Gary’s taking notes furiously.
flawedplan said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:07
Hi Sadly lovelies, I been away a few months, but am about to catch up. Where do I find the dog book?
Seitz said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:08
I didn’t know you could get a Ph.D. in paralegal studies.
Maybe they’re more educated, yet still dumber, than JDs.
Their goal is to establish a world wide Islamic caliphate
My goal is to win NCAA Championship in the 100M dash. Seeing as how I’m 34, not particularly fast, and out of eligibility, my chances of reaching that goal are roughly the same as the islamofacists chances of reaching theirs.
mikey said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:11
“Click on it again, you lying sack of pork infested, goat fucking, woman hating piece of shit.”
“Pork Infested”? Huh? First of all, I think that would have to be Pinko Punko. He of the holy snorkle. Second, I LOVE pork. Pork is not a bad thing. So why would “pork infested” be an insult. Seems to me, since practicing muslims don’t eat pork, if anything, in beth’s tiny world of hate and anger, “pork infested” would be a complimentary description, as it would clearly be describing someone other than a muslim.
Here we have, in sum, the entire New Right / Reaganite style which has dominated U.S. politics for the last 30 odd years.
Oh goody. I’ve perfected it. Can I get some of that sweet RM Scaife money and a cushy gig at peed-my-pajamas media?
mikey
Hoosier X said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:11
I’d say your chances are MUCH better because you actually exist.
BillyD said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:12
I bet Ben posts as Ann Althouse
t4toby said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:12
Seitz-
Do you live near KC?
kiki said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:17
By the way, I know the phrase “Islamofascist” is a handy catch-all term for real or imagined Muslim ooga-booga-men that we can use to ensure that we’re at least vaguely on the same page as the delusional freaks we’re berating - sorry, debating - but there are other phrases we could use that have a snappy ring and still portray the full hideousness of the Islamo menace. I think we should use phrases like “ultra-conservative Islam” or “extreme right-wing Islam” - hell, even just “right-wing Islam”. It’s accurate, and would really get Beth/Ben/Gary/pick-your-favourite-right-wing-halfwit’s goat.
Hoosier X said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:18
I looked at beth, beth or beth’s site for a minute and decided Gavin was being more than fair to the weird sisters. And it looked like - I may be wrong about this - it looked like beth, beth or beth is supporting Fred Thompson.
Can relatives use support of Fred Thompson to prove insanity and have someone committed? Just wondering.
Even my Reagan-loving Mom has enough sanity to see that Giuliani, Thompson, Romney and McCain are all delusional, evil, stupid and/or opportunistic. (I suspect she’ll declare for Ron Paul soon.)
t4toby said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:19
Bu..Bu..but..
You capitalized islam!
Hoosier X said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:20
I like it, kiki. “Conservative Islam” it is, from now on.
Dain Brammaged said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:21
LOL mikey, LOL.
TRex said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:25
I told you you had one chance left to even prove you were part of the human race. The site does open, it’s not my fault you’re totally incompetent. Click on it again, you lying sack of pork infested, goat fucking, woman hating piece of shit.
Oh, and your comments will be moderated so if you want any face time, any publicity, anything, then you better clean up your act or you’ll flat out be banned instead of just edited. You’ve run out of chances. And I won’t hesitate to report you to our FBI, even though you’re in India. Got it asswipe? Keep in mind YOU came to MY blog and started the name calling shit and it’s obvious you can dish it out but you’re nowhere near man enough to take it.
Go ahead and report me, dickwad. While you’re at it, moron, prove the violence you claim I threatened. Haha–you can’t because I didn’t. Just keep in mind you came to MY blog and started YOUR shit–and I have the entire record.
Goodness gracious!
It appears the Righty crowd have finally filled the vacant chair left when Ilyka Damen converted.
Legalize said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:25
What Saul, Beth, and the rest of the mouth-breathers repeatedly fail to recognize is that while Hitler was an actual fascist with the intent and apparant capability to fulfill his fucked-up-ed-ness, the half-wit fanatics running about in the desert haven’t the resources, nor the corporate machine (kinda inherent with fascism) to actually achieve anything of substance. Besides, with A-Rod leaving the Yankees, I aspire to play 3d base in the Bronx next year. Do any of you patriots have the moral resolve to stop my evil plot?
Southern Beale said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:26
Apparently Ben .. is actually ‘dajjal,’ who posts with Beth at Miss Beth’s Stomping Grounds, while Beth also posts with Ben, under the name ‘Ben,’ ….
I’m picking up a gay subtext here.
Galactic Dustbin said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:27
Everytime you captialize ‘islam’, God kills a kitten.
t4toby said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:29
Yeah, I think I’ll be ‘Beth’ whenever I troll for sex on Craigslist.
“I am not, and have never been, gay.”
Sure, Be(n)th, sure.
El Cid said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:29
“The Islamic Right.” Apt, particularly how it was the policy of the awesome, supremely wise U.S. foreign policy establishment to empower their thugs and clients across the Muslim world to eliminate any leftist Muslims they could.
And, of course, the same extremist right wing drug running terrorist warlord fundamentalist Islamic nuts hired by the liberal hawks and the Reagan right to destroy the secular government of Afghanistan were awesome “freedom fighters” then but terrible Islamo-fascists now.
Of course, if Islamo-Fascists were really and truly fascist, then Michael Ledeen and the NR types would love them.
THAT is your simplest way of knowing that they don’t really mean it when they use the term “Islamofascist”.
El Cid said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:29
By the way, “Islam” is not capitalized in Arabic.
El Cid said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:32
What would be really awesome would be to win the NCAA Basketball championship while simultaneously setting a record in the 100M dash.
not funny because it's true said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:32
http://www.bazelon.org/issues/commitment/positionstatement.html
El Cid said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:37
Hmm. How quickly will the Bush Jr / Cheney middle finger be delivered to this ruling?
But, of course, if AIPAC lobbyists argue in court that they themselves are unofficially helping to determine U.S. foreign policy, THEY ARE ANTI-SEMITES AND DERSHOWITZ NEEDS TO TORTURE THEM RIGHT NOW.
kiki said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:38
“I like it, kiki. “Conservative Islam” it is, from now on.”
Catchy, ain’t it? It stems from an exchange I had on another board where I challenged the resident trolls to name one substantive social issue on which their views differed from those of the right-wing Islamists they claimed to despise. They launched into a spectacularly cretinous bout of diversionary quibbling over the definition of the term “neocon”, but of course, they couldn’t name one.
I extend the same challenge to Sadly, No!’s knuckle-dragging set, of course.
t4toby said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:40
Did you just imply that I have really long arms?
Notorious P.A.T. said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:40
I’m just an ordinary person tired of the liberal stranglehold on this country.
Thank you, Beth, I needed a laugh today.
Clem said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:41
Gavin,
“Zoom?” Jesus Christ. In a childhood scrapbook, I still have the 1974-vintage, addressed-to-me “Zoom” postcard with a picture of Tracy on it. I was four, she was eight, it never would have worked. The show just wasn’t the same after she left.
“Zoom.” Christ on a pony.
saul said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:41
If the west doesn’t wake up and take this threat seriously the Islamo-fascists absolutely do have a chance of achieving their fascist goals. Right now most of Europe is ignorant to the threat as evidenced by recent polls which show that more Germans think the US and Israel are greater threats to world peace than Iran. Or maybe the Germans just miss their Nazi overlords and want to try and take over the world themselves and get their butts handed to them a third time. And one more thing about the similarity between the Islamo-fascists and the Nazis, they both want to exterminate the Jews. Hitler, Bin Laden and Ahmadenijad have all said that publicly. That is why Iran must be stopped at all costs from building nuclear weapons.
Dennis Savage said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:47
You left out a comma. Fixed.
sophie brown said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:48
I LOVED Zoom. When I was at Boston University in the late ’70s the original Asian Zoom girl was there. She was like so cool. We were like so in awe.
Hoosier X said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:49
Maybe they’re looking at the reality on the ground, and assessing who’s actually done more damage and more killing over the last few years. As opposed to the conservative methodology of repeating childish nonsense over and over again and pissing themseles and hiding under the bed.
Just a thought. An independent one. I made it up myself.
Where do you get your thoughts? Wal-Mart?
Hoosier X said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:51
If I upset you by disagreeing with you, I apologize. I’ll try to be more politically correct next time and consider your feelings.
Notorious P.A.T. said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:51
Their goal is to establish a world wide Islamic caliphate. . . The end result of each would be very much the same, the entire world ruled by a fascist regime.
That is more or less exactly like saying “vegetarians are trying to take over the world, and if they do they will force us to eat hamburgers.”
A caliph is a religious leader, one who puts his religion first. A fascist is a political leader, one who puts his state above all else. To the fascist, his country and its government are first, last, and all-important. In other words, you can not be a fascist AND believe that your religion is the most important thing in the world.
Shorter me: The term “islamofascist” is a term invented by idiots for idiots.
Bonus question for those who are against “islamofascism”: the term “fascism” includes characteristics such as nationalism, militarism, and corporatism. If you are against fascism, that means you are against those things too, right? And since you are against those things, what are you prepared to do to stop them right here in America?
Gavin M. said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:52
I was more into Bernadette, but it seems there are other reasons besides age that it wouldn’t have worked:
http://www.bernadetteyao.com/
a different brad said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:56
Just to make clear, I have no connection to the Beth referred to here;
Beth, are you confusing Gavin with Ann Althouse, who I am not?
Despondant Cantabridgian said,
November 2, 2007 at 21:58
Islamofascism’s Top Secret Plan for World Conquest:
1) Appear to be divided into mutually hostile governments, religious sects, and strains of nuttiness. This way they will never suspect that you are actually a well-armed and unified global caliphate plotting to destroy the West. Also, frequently threaten to unite all Muslims and destroy the West. Then they’ll never guess.
2) ???
3) VICTORY!!!
Despondant Cantabridgian said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:01
I wonder how old that second kid, the one in the blue and red striped shirt is these days? I’ll bet he’s downright legal!
Seitz said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:02
Do you live near KC?
Not particularly. Depends on how you define close. Chicago?
Or is this a joke I’m not getting?
Hoosier X said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:02
I’m assuming Step 2 is a carefully detailed plan that shows how they will do it (probably as detailed and as credible as the Protocols of the Elders of Zion), but it’s in Arabic so it came up as question marks.
Idiot said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:04
Hey! I like the term Islamo-Facsist!
Are you making fun of me?
a different beth said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:05
I didn’t write this, btw.
Emak Bakia said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:06
I’ll bet “Saul” is really “Gary” too.
Despondant Cantabridgian said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:08
Hoosier X, you are correct, but I can only assume that it is because you have islamified yourself, especially considering the X in your name. (Note: islamified is NOT capitalized. Heh.)
We could learn Arabic and decode their mystery plan, but that would be unpatriotic and too difficult. Besides, bombs make better telivision viewing.
Legalize said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:12
“Hitler, Bin Laden and Ahmadenijad have all said that publicly. That is why Iran must be stopped at all costs from building nuclear weapons.”
1. Hitler is long dead.
2. Bin Laden has nothing to do with Iran; in fact, Iran being a largely modern Shi’ia nation is entirely inapposite to the Suni bin Laden.
3. Ahmadenijad never said he wanted to exterminate the Jews, as has been repeatedly demonstrated. More importantly, Ahmadenijad has neither the capacity nor political support to pull off such a stunt.
4. Fascism has nothing to do with religious fanaticism, and everything with nationalism, corporatism, militarism, and the glory of the state above all else, as emobodied by an all powerful executive. Sound familiar? It should. Hint: it ain’t Islam, professor.
Hysterical Woman said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:16
I don’t hate christians, just christianity. I didn’t capitalize it for a reason.
Despondant Cantabridgian said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:17
Aw, Legalize, let the little tyke be. He’s just repeating what the grownups say.
Hey, saul, did you get any good candy this year?
El Cid said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:17
For the curious, the question marks came up when I tried to use Arabic script. Instead I transliterated into phonetics.
a different beth said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:18
I’m a different different beth from the different beth above.
People can have the same name morons-And I didn’t capitalize morons intentionally-DUH!
t4toby said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:21
There you go, Legalize, trying to explain aerodynamics to a mailbox.
And, Seitz, I was just wondering if I went to school with you. I guess not.
Thers said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:22
It isn’t right to call Beth “Beth.”
Call her “Althouse.”
t4toby said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:23
I suspected that, El Cid, but I didn’t see any durka durkas in the phoenetic translation, so I knew it wasn’t real islamo-fascist.
same beth said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:25
I’m actually a different beth from the others. Isn’t that obvious from my writing style? I’m batshit insane in a completely unique way. Morans.
Despondant Cantabridgian said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:25
Maybe the various beths could tell us what points they disagree on, eh? Because if they all think and write in exactly the same way, I could care less how many fingers are pounding this pulp out.
Legalize said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:26
“There you go, Legalize, trying to explain aerodynamics to a mailbox.”
Actually, my mailbox seemed to get the gist. A number of citation errors in its term paper, however.
J— said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:27
Hi Sadly lovelies, I been away a few months, but am about to catch up. Where do I find the dog book?
Hey, flawedplan. Good to see you. By dog book do you mean something like a guide to major breeds?
mikey said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:34
recent polls which show that more Germans think the US and Israel are greater threats to world peace than Iran.
No shit. Really? Gee, I wonder where they might have come up with such a wacky consensus. D’you suppose they might have looked around at the world to determine which countries were currently invading/occupying/attacking/bombing other countries, and determined on the basis of that history AND the current threats and saber-rattling that they are the nations most likely to do it again?
The US and Israel are dangerous, heavily armed thugish rogue nations who do not seem to have any internal restraints against launching deadly military attacks and invasions on any other nation they choose, for any reasons they choose. Used to be the US was the one to roll back aggression. Now we lead the league in aggression…
mikey
Oh, I don’t have the pie script installed on this machine (yet), so yeah, I responded to that weird little cretin saul, but if the little fucker tries to respond I’m gonna go back to ignoring him and his somewhat mainstream love of desert pastries…
Various oysterz and scallopz said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:36
It’s not the fans I hate, it’s the band!
Doodle Bean said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:39
I told you you had one chance left to even prove you were part of the human race.
Damn, Gav! She is onto your true identity!! Quick, activate your super-Turing mode stat!
Also, I like the term islamofascist, but only when used ironically. Especially in combination with other mutually-exclusive isms such as communism or feminism (Feminislamofascist, etc)
I will put in a serious plea now - please avoid using ‘right-wing’ or ‘right’ when referring to conservatives or wingnuts. There are lots of people out there who genuinely believe the Repugs are correct because they are called ‘right’.
How to I know this? I work with hundreds of them. Hearing something here such as, “They must be right because they are called ‘the Right’.” is not uncommon. Also, “those liberals are going to be left behind if they don’t shape up! Why do you think they are called ‘the Left’?” Yes, my workplace is a living hell if I think about it too much.
But please. Use basic framing and avoid the term ‘right’. Hanx!
Oh, and I don’t think ’saul’ is gary. He’s not wordy enough.
Beth said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:41
I’m not that Beth, you idiot! I’m that other Beth. Get a brain!
Hoosier X said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:42
I don’t hate Christianity.
I do have a very strong dislike for certain Christians. The ones who say God works in mysterious ways when they can’t rationalize the Bible’s contradictions, but have no problem speaking for God when it comes to gay marriage.
A tiny bit of consistency would help Christianity immensely.
Beth said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:43
I’m Beth; so is my wife!
beth said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:44
How could you confuse me with all those other Beths?
Is it not clear from my writings that I am the one and only true beth?
kenga said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:46
Now mikey - you should respect the Cock. Er, Glock …
Hoosier X said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:47
Doodle Bean,
Do they also say shit like “It’s Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve!” like its a Bible verse? Or like it actually means something?
Another one I like is “If men evolved from monkeys, why are there still monkeys?” Gosh, Einstein, you got me there!
You can’t say “It’s not rocket science” because everything is rocket science to these people.
beth said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:50
Beth bethbeth beth bethbethbeth? Beth beth beth bethbeth bethbethbethbeth beth bethbethbeth! Beth bethbeth!! Beth beth bethbethbethbethbeth beth bethbeth. Beth beth bethbeth beth bethbethbethbethbethbethbethbeth beth beth!!!!√121!!
g said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:50
Their goal is to establish a world wide Islamic caliphate, the goal of Nazi Germany was to establish a world wide German Empire. The end result of each would be very much the same, the entire world ruled by a fascist regime.
Wow - world domination to spread their way of life! That’s unfathomable evil!
[British Empire]
[Holy Roman Empire]
[Byzantine Empire]
[Spanish Conquest of the Americas]
[Crusdades]
lame man said,
November 2, 2007 at 22:59
Beth, I hear you callin
But I cant come home right now
Me and the boys are fightin muslims
And we just cant find the religious justification for hating millions of people
Just a few more footnotes in obscure religious texts
And Ill be right home to you
I think I hear the islamofascists callin
Oh, beth what can I do
Beth what can I do
flawedplan said,
November 2, 2007 at 23:00
Howdy J, I came by to find the 8,000 comment thread on Identity Politics we did early this year, need to do some studying, but went into fits of hysteria at this from Miss Beth:
No, that belongs on a shirt.
not that beth, the other beth said,
November 2, 2007 at 23:01
I think that you should all just come to my main site, so that I can show all of my friends named Beth that I do matter.
(Plus, I get paid by the hit for my ads.)
Beth's Uncle's Brother's Cousin's Barber's Dog Walker's Girl he used to date in the Eighties, who also happens to go by Beth. said,
November 2, 2007 at 23:03
All of the confusion about who the real Beth is should be obvious. Duh!
Smiling Mortician said,
November 2, 2007 at 23:04
There are lots of people out there who genuinely believe the Repugs are correct because they are called ‘right’.
Um, Doodle Bean? Do you really think those people are going to suddenly develop the intellectual capacity to understand the world around them if we all agree to stop calling it “right wing”? My condolences, BTW, on your work situation, colleague-wise.
Progessive Beth, Innocent Victim of Circumstance said,
November 2, 2007 at 23:04
Why have I been receiving so many scuba gear catalogs lately?
Despondant Cantabridgian said,
November 2, 2007 at 23:05
Whoa Nellie, I don’t know if she can even get a toilet this big.
Don’t you idiots know anything about the Bible? When Jesus says he’s going to torture most of humanity for eternity in hellfire, that isn’t violent or hateful - it’s just a fact. Divine justice. Some people way back at the beginning of time at an apple they weren’t suppposed to, you see. Fair is fair.
r@d@r said,
November 2, 2007 at 23:08
Beth bethbeth beth bethbethbeth? Beth beth beth bethbeth bethbethbethbeth beth bethbethbeth! Beth bethbeth!! Beth beth bethbethbethbethbeth beth bethbeth. Beth beth bethbeth beth bethbethbethbethbethbethbethbeth beth beth!!!!?121!!
thanks for the ‘being john malkovich’ reference. my day is now complete.
mikey said,
November 2, 2007 at 23:11
I don’t hate Christianity.
I guess I could say this is true of me also, but only because it’s really not a valid construct. While I have strong feelings about the value of certain mythologies, I don’t think it’s possible to “hate” one.
That said, I am very firmly in the Sam Harris camp, and believe that religion and “faith” as they currently exist are dangerous and destructive, and it’s hard to visualize a sustainable society without their elimination.
As long as people are allowed to build a worldview that is entirely based on unreasonable beliefs unsupported by any facts or observations, and then while holding this worldview and using it to make value judgments and to guide important decisions, we will end up with ancient tribal hatreds and alliances driving our societal relations with the most disastrous results…
mikey
les said,
November 2, 2007 at 23:12
OK, this is OT, but nobody seems to come up with the right topic, so anyway. Why in the flaming blue halls of hell are American god-botherers so damn bad at their god-bothering??? I mean, by number and percentage, we have more god-botherers than any other country in the non-islamocommunowierdsortareligion world; we have more uber-rich televised god botherers than anybody else; we have more property, assets and income dedicated to god-bothering than the rest of the Western world combined (ok, maybe excluding Vatican City or whatever the pope country is called); and yet the U.S. appears to be god’s own dart board. The islamofascist hordes are at our borders, the omgthey’rescary brown hordes are within our borders, we’re constantly being specifically targeted by natural disasters, etc. If all these frenzied faithful could god bother worth a rusty fuck, we should be safe as houses. Dammit, on your scabby knees and get to work.
a different brad said,
November 2, 2007 at 23:20
My first cat was named Beth. She was a little black and white from a local grocery. She had the loudest purr of any cat I’ve ever known, and licked my hands when happy. Got her when I was five, she died two days before I graduated from college.
Eff you other Beths for soiling her name, except, of course, for the other, different Beths who aren’t like those Beths who Beth a Beth Beth.
J— said,
November 2, 2007 at 23:23
but went into fits of hysteria at this from Miss Beth
Got it. Sometimes a dog is a bigoted bounty hunter with a soon-to-be-canceled reality TV show.
Lawnguylander said,
November 2, 2007 at 23:26
Yes, Kathleen. It is priceless. A moonbat’s view of a wingnut’s view of free speech but written by a wingnut not a moonbat. Auto-idiotic pwnation so perfect one has to suspect parody and taking of the piss.
And I love kiki’s suggestions. I hope they catch on. I like “conservative Islam” better because it will drive the wingnuts nuttier but “right wing Islam” might be a more accurate label. Sorry, Doodle Bean.
J— said,
November 2, 2007 at 23:27
Doodle Bean: Turn it into a teaching experience! Tell them about the seating arrangement of the French Legislative Assembly in 1791.
Wife of Bath said,
November 2, 2007 at 23:33
People often confuse me for the Wife of Beth. Or of Beth. Or even of the other Beth. But I’m not, and here’s your proof:
Thank you.
Wife of Bath said,
November 2, 2007 at 23:34
Hey! Where’s my pithy comment?
Qetesh the Abyssinian said,
November 2, 2007 at 23:35
Les: what you said. Scabby knees it is, godbotherers!
josephdietrich said,
November 2, 2007 at 23:41
After reading all this hullabaloo, I’m starting to get the impression that this Beth person is just simply not very smart. Which I guess is an ad hominem and therefore bad, but still.
t4toby, who actually currently does not know anyone, nor does he know anyone associated with anyone named Beth said,
November 2, 2007 at 23:43
Scabby knees? I thought I made the swallowing comment in the next thread.
Despondant Cantabridgian said,
November 2, 2007 at 23:52
les:
Taking your question semi-seriously, the answer is that, despite complaining when we quote the OT, much of their worldview is framed by the OT.
See, God is like a mafia king. He helps you out, lets you get out of slavery and conquer some land, or maybe slaughter the inhabitants of a continent and build a global empire, you say, “Thanks God!”
The thing is, someday he might want you to do something in return. And if you cross him, I mean, wow, I don’t even wanna think about it. Look at what he did to the Jews! Invasions, plagues, famine, locusts, re-enslavement, diaspora, persecution, the Shoah… now they’ve got the islamonazis.
Read any of the OT prophets. Everyone has to convert and do this or xyz will happen. Hoo boy, here comes xyz. If we end up with a global caliphate, don’t say the Christians didn’t warn you.
Matt T. said,
November 2, 2007 at 23:54
So. This woman has multiple websites and blogs dedicated to hatin’ the Muslims and/or just hating Islam. Is that right? Man. That’s a lot of effort into filling your soul with bile. I mean, really, couldn’t you just stand on the street corner and scream incoherently for a couple hours, then move on with your day?
I used to date a girl named Beth. She was nice, don’t remember why we broke up, though. I don’t reckon this is her, though. Boy, that would suck, wouldn’t it? Finding out years later that being in a relationship drove someone wingnut?
Kathleen said,
November 3, 2007 at 0:02
are you implying that one (or more) of these Beths is a cat, different Brad?!
a different brad said,
November 3, 2007 at 0:06
As in
Oh Hai!
I can haz izlamofobeya?
Kathleen?
Ruthie said,
November 3, 2007 at 0:09
And further down in that comment Miss Beth lays out the wingnut version of free speech:
See, here in the United States, we have something called Freedom of Speech that works both ways–I don’t have to listen to your shit. And I can say whatever the hell I want.
Oops! Looks like Ms. Beth just flunked her Miller Analogy Test. No Ph.D. in paralegal studies for HER!
Kathleen said,
November 3, 2007 at 0:13
or as in:
Iz made u a pork infested piece of shit but I eated it.
Smiling Mortician said,
November 3, 2007 at 0:17
How did u get it out uv teh bag, Kat-leen?
Ex-Fed said,
November 3, 2007 at 0:36
Wow, Beth’s web site design just screams “unmedicated personality disorder,” doesn’t it? Really, I’ve seen cleaner designs by people who blog about how the CIA has implanted a listening device in their scrotum.
Moonbat Rising said,
November 3, 2007 at 0:37
Notorious P.A.T. is a gawd of the InterToobz.
InsaneInTheCheneyBrain said,
November 3, 2007 at 0:38
How deluded do you have to be to think there’s a liberal stranglehold? Is this the whole “reality has a liberal bias” thing, because they’re indignant that they clapped OH-SO-HARD but Tinkerbell is still dead?
Qetesh the Abyssinian said,
November 3, 2007 at 0:49
Hey, no impugning the cats, adb. We iz not crzy kthxbai.
jlo said,
November 3, 2007 at 0:56
josephdietrich said,
November 2, 2007 at 23:41
After reading all this hullabaloo, I’m starting to get the impression that this Beth person is just simply not very smart. Which I guess is an ad hominem and therefore bad, but still.
=================================
Yep. Just check this snippet from her bio:
“I’m a single mom with two teenagers at home, a grown child who has left the nest and three incredible grandchildren.”
So, Beth’s grandchildren are “1. not credible. 2 seeming too unusual to be possible” (according to Webster’s).
Don’t worry Beth, I’m sure they feel the same way about their Nana!
Get it! cuz you’re fuggin nutz!
Mehitabel the Abyssinian said,
November 3, 2007 at 1:05
How did u get it out uv teh bag, Kat-leen?
Her wave function collapsed.
Mehitabel the Abyssinian said,
November 3, 2007 at 1:09
Im in ur sak
infestin ur pawk
DEMIZE! said,
November 3, 2007 at 2:15
This has become far to Byzantine for my limited skillz,but I have a feeling Bruce might be hanging out with at least one Beth…
Snorghagen said,
November 3, 2007 at 2:18
Miss Beth knows that if you stand on the street corner and scream you’re exposed to wind and rain and cold and eventually someone comes and takes you to a place where they give you meds that make you drool. She has found that expressing herself online is much better all around - she’s more comfortable indoors where kids don’t throw things at her and she has easier access to the many, many tins of Vienna Sausages she has stored behind the couch.
Nylund said,
November 3, 2007 at 2:48
Apparently, all the Beth’s have forgotten 1 Timothy 2:12
“But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.”
In other words, Beth(s), you are commanded by Jesus to STFU.
Arky said,
November 3, 2007 at 2:55
“But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.”
You’re assuming Beth: 1. Is a female (hard to tell with the neo-cons these days), 2. Gives a flaming damn about the Bible (see previous parenthetical post).
Nylund said,
November 3, 2007 at 2:58
I think this quote from Jesus sums up my feelings on Beth(s):
“Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You travel over land and sea to win a single convert, and when he becomes one, you make him twice as much a son of hell as you are…You are like whitewashed tombs, which look beautiful on the outside but on the inside are full of dead men’s bones and everything unclean. In the same way, on the outside you appear to people as righteous but on the inside you are full of hypocrisy and wickedness.”
Jscopes said,
November 3, 2007 at 3:17
Islamofacists.
Do they have snappy uniforms yet?
mikey said,
November 3, 2007 at 3:17
Thing is, most everything I enjoy can fairly be described as “unclean wickedness”.
Bummer, huh?
mikey
Ben said,
November 3, 2007 at 3:31
I just want to point out that I’m a different Ben than the one you’re talking about. Although I do blog at Moderate MILFs for a Piece.
owlbear1 said,
November 3, 2007 at 3:32
OK Its my contention that The Mighty THOR wants to be a godly enforcer of justice but ends up just being a dick with a magic hammer.
Qetesh the Abyssinian said,
November 3, 2007 at 3:35
Mikey, you just have to make the change to clean wickedness. Do it for the gipper.
saul said,
November 3, 2007 at 3:46
Islam is the only religion in the world that commits acts of terrorism in this day in age. I’m not saying I hate all muslims, I don’t. I am saying that the moderate muslims need to speak out against these monsters who have hijacked their religion and join the west in combating these insane mad men.
Qetesh the Abyssinian said,
November 3, 2007 at 3:59
Saul, you are such a dick. The most prolific suicide terrorists are the Tamil Tigers, and they’re nominally Hindu. Of course, like most terrorist groups, their intent is political, so they’re technically secular nationalists, I think.
Try reading “Dying to Win” The Strategic Logic Of Suicide Terrorism” by Robert Pape. It’s an in-depth study of suicide terrorism, and I’m sure you’d learn a few facts therein.
mikey said,
November 3, 2007 at 4:03
OK Its my contention that The Mighty THOR wants to be a godly enforcer of justice but ends up just being a dick with a magic hammer.
I’d like to point out how much that sucks.
I’d want to be a hammer with a magic dick. But that’s just me…
mikey
Qetesh the Abyssinian said,
November 3, 2007 at 4:15
Where’s Beth? I skive off all my work for the afternoon (intending to wing it tomorrow), in the hopes of playing wingnut bingo, and she’s not here. Where’s the extra-crunchy wingnutty goodness I was promised?
DEMIZE! said,
November 3, 2007 at 4:19
New Joe Strummer movie Y’all!!!
mikey said,
November 3, 2007 at 4:21
Man, Qetesh, I’ll never get it all straight in my mind. It’s early on a friday night here, just barely seven, I’m on my third scotch and it’s starting to give me a buzz, and I know the right-coasters, especially the young ones, are partying on friday night with their “dates” and their hippity hop music, but it still, even at this point, boggles my tiny mind that it’s morning elsewhere. Have a nice coffee and a waffle, my dear. Meantime, it’s friday night…
mikey
J— said,
November 3, 2007 at 4:26
I’d want to be a hammer with a magic dick. But that’s just me…
A Magic Dick with a harp wouldn’t be bad.
Lesley said,
November 3, 2007 at 4:28
I suspect Miss Beth does her “victory dance” in clog shoes which would make her a cloghopper.
Lesley said,
November 3, 2007 at 4:31
Found Miss Beth’s victory dance har!
mikey said,
November 3, 2007 at 4:58
Maybe so, but in mikey world this is not a movie - its a documentary.
mikey
owlbear1 said,
November 3, 2007 at 4:58
Hammer with a magic dick sounds pretty scary to me mikey.
Qetesh the Abyssinian said,
November 3, 2007 at 5:13
Apropos of absolutely nothing, am I the only one who keeps expecting Dick Cheney to grab someone by their shirtfront and shout “It’s not my goddam planet, monkey boy!”?
Surely not.
owlbear1 said,
November 3, 2007 at 5:28
Brain sucking alien would certainly explain the DC media’s sycophancy of Dick and George.
Anne Laurie said,
November 3, 2007 at 5:39
Do you suppose they use that bitter, snarling tone because they know in their heart they are wrong? Because it’s kind of a weird response to a suggestion that tolerance and peaceful coexistence might be a better, more sustainable way to live than wholesale destruction and eternal warfare.
No, I think it’s the human version of “junkyard dog syndrome”. You take an undernourished puppy away from its dam, stick it in a concrete-and-asphalt pen full of dangerous crap, insufficiently protected from the elements, and feed it garbage when you remember to feed it at all. Make sure it’s got a good view, through the chainlink fence, of all the cars, squirrels, people, and other dogs going by, living their lives, doing stuff, having fun, and totally ignoring the increasingly overstimulated animal. After a few months, you’re liable to end up with a dog who can’t do anything but race to & fro, or spin in tight circles, barking & snarling & attacking anything that approaches. It takes months of hard work to rehabilitate a dog with these problems, if it can be done at all…
All the Beths and Bens yapping at every falling leaf, racing back and forth along the same tightly proscribed talking points, flinging themselves at the mental chainlink barriers they’ve set up until they drop with exhaustion, attacking even the most unthreatening overtures from those outside their compounds full of intellectual garbage… even when they tell me they’ve done all this to *themselves*, that they’re happy pacing through a kennel full of their own wastes looking for another “intruder” to assault, I still find it sad.
Anne Laurie said,
November 3, 2007 at 5:44
Islam is the only religion in the world that commits acts of terrorism in this day in age.
Saul, when Eric Rudolph gets out, he is sooo going to kick your ass. Never diss the Swords of the Lord, unbeliever!
Qetesh the Abyssinian said,
November 3, 2007 at 5:59
Anne Laurie, you nearly made me cry. I don’t know how people can mistreat animals like that.
Well, I do: they have no empathy. I’d share mine with them if I could, because I’ve got plenty.
Goddammit, the dogs are better than the humans. And this is a cat saying it.
Lesley said,
November 3, 2007 at 6:34
it’s always amusing when someone who says “you lying sack of pork infested, goat fucking, woman hating piece of shit” also says “your comments will be moderated so if you want any face time, any publicity, anything, then you better clean up your act”.
Crystal Beth said,
November 3, 2007 at 6:40
I’m the real beth and the rest of these “beths” are just islamic muslim dooky head pig biting - did you know spoons are really shiny. I like that word. Spoon. Spoooon…SHUT UP YOU BASTARDS!!1!
Nylund said,
November 3, 2007 at 7:02
Saul,
As was stated, there are many non-muslim religious terrorists. Eric Rudolph, who is part of Army of God, is one such example, as are the previously mentioned Tamil Tigers. God’s Army in Burma is another Christian group designated as terrorists, as are the National Liberation Front of Tripura, supported by the Tripura Baptist Church (they kill Hindus in India). There are Jewish terrorists (JDL), hindi terrorists, etc. etc. The IRA could be called a Christian terrorist group as well. There was also Aum Shinrikyo, who famously gassed the subways in Tokyo. In the former yugoslavia, both the Christian and Muslim sides committed horrible atrocities to each other.
I will grant you that there are more (and bigger) terrorists group fighting in the name of Islam than any other religion, but to state that it is the sole religion to practice terrorism is absurd.
Also, if there is any conflict between a state and a group, the group activity is usually classifed as terrorism, while the acts of the state are not (as terrorism is usually if not defined by, characterized by an attack against the state (or majority). I would not be surprised if it was your belief that if Iraqi’s attack US soldiers, its terrorism, but if US soldiers attack Iraqi’s, it is not. Thus, the mutual acts of violence between two groups may result in very different definitions of that violence. I do not think the US government conducts terrorist activities, but I am bothered by the large number of bombing campaigns the US has undertaken and the vast amounts of civilians who die as a result. My main point is that when a government kills civilians, it is not classified as terrorism, but when a rebelling army does, it is classified as so. I am sure many of those rebel groups (whether right or wrong) believe in their cause and consider this classification system to be unfair.
I am also sure that King George III considered the guerrilla tactics of the continental army during the revolutionary war to be acts of terrorism.
Some people (but not including me) define terrorism as “the deliberate creation and exploitation of fear for bringing about political change.” Now ask yourself if you use your tactic of creating a fear of muslims as a way to bring out your desired political results in this country? You don’t blow up federal buildings like that non-muslim Timothy McVeigh, so I would not call you a terrorist, but nonetheless, I am highly troubled by your use of “fear” as a tactic in our political discourse.
mikey said,
November 3, 2007 at 7:14
Anne Laurie, you nearly made me cry. I don’t know how people can mistreat animals like that.
It’s not just that the shiny cylinder stood out from the drab brown earth the way it did. Even at five, Hannah would have known that signified danger. But it was kind of a soft peach color, and it looked like it was soft to the touch. Hannah didn’t know what it was, but she knew many things could be dangerous around her aunt’s farm in southern Lebanon.
She found a piece of wood, and she poked it, first gently, then more vigorously. It seemed heavy for it’s size, which made Hannah even more curious. Finally she could contain her own curiosity no more. Certainly it was safe after all the prodding she’d given it.
Carefully she bent down and picked the cylinder up. She could fee the weight and heft inside. Hannah wondered if perhaps it had a monetary value, if she could sell it and help her parents pay rent on their farm. She turned the cylinder over, to see if it had a label or anything. Felt the contents come loose, and shift towards the other end….
BAM
Hannah will spend the next sixty three years blind, with only six-inch stumps for arms. She will never know joy, or peace, or love, or weath, or success. She will dwell, lost,in a world of eternal darkness, and ever few hours someone will feed her a meal not of her choosing or help her to the bathroom.
Yeah.
Those poor animals…
mikey
Anne Laurie said,
November 3, 2007 at 8:03
Mikey, I prefer to phrase it “I don’t know how people can mistreat other animals like that.”
Because the kid who enjoys torturing frogs so much that his playmates remember it 40 years later is the man who enjoys making fun of a woman he’s just condemned to death is the president who doesn’t care how many American soldiers die horribly just so that he can give his ‘Democrat’ enemies a big public eff-you.
Or, alternately, as a psychiatrist once told me concerning the chaotic adult lives of the children of abusive parents, “When you grow up in a war zone, you’re liable to end up with PTSD.”
Darkrose said,
November 3, 2007 at 8:05
mikey: I’d want to be a hammer with a magic dick. But that’s just me…
Please, Hammer–don’t hurt ‘em!
Cyber Pastor said,
November 3, 2007 at 8:06
“Even my Reagan-loving Mom has enough sanity to see that Giuliani, Thompson, Romney and McCain are all delusional, evil, stupid and/or opportunistic. (I suspect she’ll declare for Ron Paul soon.)”
After reading your hate filled comments about a truly decent person, (oh, for you Beth and Ben conspiracy theorists - you know not of what you speak - imagine that), I tried to pick out something that had some substance to it and the above quote is the best I could find.
If, while you were attempting to continue to get your jollies, you would have really checked out her site, you would know where she stands on the above named Republican candidates. I know I know where she stands.
I’m not going to do your work for you though other than to say that mentioning the name of the great Ronald Reagan in the same paragraph with ron paul (sorry, I don’t show respect by capitalizing names for those who don’t respect our troops) is totally out of my comprehension.
And I’m wondering how someone who has a Reagan loving mother has an offspring that is a part of such a hateful, rude, and disrespectful bunch?
Maybe you could learn something about respect from good ol’ Ronnie - he had such a high respect for the office he held that he would never enter the Oval Office without his suitcoat on.
Go ahead, make your funny comments, but maybe you could learn a thing or three about respect.
And one final note, you mention the above names being opportunisitic and your side of the fence is going to name hilary as your nominee - that irony has me needing to roll on the floor in laughter!!!!
Snorghagen said,
November 3, 2007 at 8:27
Thank you, Cyber Pastor Ed, for visiting us and giving us the guidance that we need. We have indeed been rude and disrespectful, but I’m sure we will all try very hard to behave ourselves in the future.
Love your tie.
D. Aristophanes said,
November 3, 2007 at 8:43
Cyber Pastor Ed - why do you hate Teh Funny?
D. Aristophanes said,
November 3, 2007 at 8:46
Also, what is a Deciblez? Why is it Daily?
El Cid said,
November 3, 2007 at 8:57
Every time one of you America haters disparages the name of Ronald Reagan, the man who created this world and only 30 years ago gave Freedom to Americans and single handedly killed Stalin Rasputin, I cry.
a different brad said,
November 3, 2007 at 9:03
Dear Cyber Pastor,
Sorry, you failed to annoy any liberals today. Try finishing with learning english, first.
love,
Ann Althouse
D. Aristophanes said,
November 3, 2007 at 9:06
As was stated, there are many non-muslim religious terrorists. Eric Rudolph, who is part of Army of God, is one such example, as are the previously mentioned Tamil Tigers. God’s Army in Burma is another Christian group designated as terrorists, as are the National Liberation Front of Tripura, supported by the Tripura Baptist Church (they kill Hindus in India).
The God’s Army in Burma was a splinter group of the Karen National Army joined by the “Vigorous Burmese Student Warriors” and “led” by a pair of pre-pubescent twins. Basically a bunch of fed-up and slightly crazy folks on the Burmese-Thai border who bit off waaaay more than they could chew in a) fighting the junta, and b) just trying to survive.
I’m not trying to dispute your premise that “terrorism” comes in many flavors well beyond Muslim, and I don’t know much about the other groups you cite. The God’s Army case is pretty complex, though, and it’s difficult for me to let it pass as an example of “Christian terrorism”.
On the other hand, maybe it just illustrates that none of this stuff is as black-and-white as the Beths make it out to be, that there are motivations for people’s actions in the world that go far past just the religion they espouse.
DEMIZE! said,
November 3, 2007 at 9:48
Beth and Cyber Pastor Bill,waging war for the civilized world through the lack of capitalization!How can you parody this stuff??
Lesley said,
November 3, 2007 at 10:19
Maybe you could learn something about respect from good ol’ Ronnie - he had such a high respect for the office he held that he would never enter the Oval Office without his suitcoat on.
Seeing as how R was afflicted with Alzheimer’s, it’s likely Mrs. Ronnie remembered to put the suit coat on him as well as ensure his grey roots were touched up with black shoe polish.
Qetesh the Abyssinian said,
November 3, 2007 at 11:21
Demosthenese, from what I’ve read very little of what’s called terrorism is about religion. All, or almost all, is about politics/nationalism/territory. At least, that’s the case with organised groups: lone nutcases are lone nutcases, and claim they speak to gods on a daily basis.
Qetesh the Abyssinian said,
November 3, 2007 at 11:22
Demosthenes. Rats.
Qetesh the Abyssinian said,
November 3, 2007 at 11:31
And MIkey, I wasn’t suggesting that I have no empathy for humans: quite the converse. But the suffering of the powerless/voiceless always makes me cry, and if there’s anyone that I can hate in this world, it’s those who cause suffering to other creatures without the slightest bit of remorse.
In case I need to be more explicit, yes, I cry over all the atrocities that humans commit on other humans. Is it any surprise that I’m heavily medicated, and will be for the rest of my life? Quite frankly, life would be a lot easier if I could be as callous and unfeeling as other people. Jeebus, I even carry spiders and bugs outside (although if they’re big spiders I tend more to shriek and throw paper jets from a distance) rather than risk stepping on them by accident.
Really, Man’s inhumanity to just about everything he can be inhuman to fills me with despair, and there are times when I can’t even bring myself to communicate in this extremely impersonal fashion. I have no traumatic experience that’s made me like this, as you have. I’m just cursed with extra dollops of weakness, I suppose.
I’ve also been supping a rather fine Hunter Valley shiraz. Take that however you wish.
El Cid said,
November 3, 2007 at 15:04
How dare all these English writers capitalize the names of God and Jesus, which originally were written in alphabets which had no lower case?
Lawnguylander said,
November 3, 2007 at 16:44
It’s funny that teh cyber paster thinks we’d care which of the republicans beth supports. My guess would be tancredo or hunter but really, who gives a fuck? I did spend enough time there to discover that “dajjal” is definitely beth. And since dajjal is admittedly “ben” they’re all the same person. Myste