12
Rhymes With Duck Face
And now for a short break from the wingnut smear job of 12-year-old brain trauma victim Graeme Frost , let’s saunter over to the Wall Street Journal where Daniel Henninger is all lathered up about the totally unfair smear job on the 56-year-old drug addict Rush Limbaugh:
I would like to put a question to [Hillary Clinton]: Would you defend Rush Limbaugh’s speech rights against the pressure that was brought upon him on the floor of the Senate by your colleagues Harry Reid and Ken Salazar? Colorado’s Sen. Salazar went so far last week as to say he’d support a Senate vote to “censure” Mr. Limbaugh. Rhymes with censor.
OMFG. It’s the irrefutable “rhymes with” argument. Hillary says she wants to support the troops. Rhymes with deport. And then there’s Barack Obama. Rhymes with Osama.
[Gavin adds: It is irrefutable that 'universal health care' rhymes with 'universal wealth scare,' and that 'Edwards' = 'dead birds.' Also, welcome to the Wall Street Journal's 'O-Ed Age.' Notice there is no 'p' in it; please keep it that way.]
Of course, the woes of Rush aren’t limited to rhyming schemes:
When Sen. Reid attacked Mr. Limbaugh on the floor of the Senate, some felt that Mr. Limbaugh was a big boy and perfectly capable of defending himself. I’m not so sure. If Mr. Limbaugh and his critics at Media Matters want to have a street fight, that’s their business. But Sens. Reid and Salazar aren’t just a couple of opinionated guys; they are agents of state authority, and they were leaning hard on Mr. Limbaugh.
Clearly if Reid and Salazar hadn’t laid off Oxycontin Rush, he’d have had no choice but to quit his radio job and spend the rest of his life as a sex tourist in the Dominican Republic.
But wait, what’s wrong with this picture? Isn’t there just a tad bit of irony in Henninger’s hissy fit about the weight of state authority leaning hard on private individuals for things they’ve said? There’s not a single word from Henninger about the Senate resolution condemning the MoveOn ad about General Petraeus. Imagine that.
Now explain to me again why it is such a bad thing that Rupert Murdoch is buying the Wall Street Journal.
Leonard Pierce said,
October 12, 2007 at 5:49
Clearly, the MoveOn resolution was totally different. It didn’t rhyme with anything.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
October 12, 2007 at 6:07
Now explain to me again why it is such a bad thing that Rupert Murdoch is buying the Wall Street Journal.
Explain to me why Rupert Murdoch has the dough to buy the WSJ, along with all the other now-crap he’s bought and turned to shite.
Lesley said,
October 12, 2007 at 6:08
To be fair, Rush has irreversible brain damage and although he is a big boy, the 40 pounds (or so) of jiggling abdominal lard he’s accumulated will only take him so far in the ring. Let’s also not forget the chronic pain that caused his ongoing drug addiction and the expensive viagra he depends on when he’s scouting for sexual ‘partners’ in third world slums.
Like the Baptist preacher who hog-tied himself in two wet suits, Rush is just another vulnerable person living on the fringes of our society. Have a little pity.
MrWonderful said,
October 12, 2007 at 6:10
Plus, do I have to point out the obvious? “Censure” doesn’t rhyme with “censor.”
“Censure” rhymes with “Ben? Sure!” It’s what Mark (as Pierce says, “The Human”) Steyn rightly calls “a feminine rhyme,” where the penultimate syllable rhymes but the final is an identity. “Indenture,” etc.
What rhymes with “censor”? “Tensor.” “Flensor,” which isn’t a word. “When, Sir?” Which is what all right-thinking people want to know.
Henninger, I put it to you: When, sir?
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
October 12, 2007 at 6:12
Someday, I will be free of the Sadly, No! free speech zone. Someday.
Me said,
October 12, 2007 at 6:16
Oddly, censure rhymes with “Shut the fuck up, ignorant gasbag”.
FlipYrWhig said,
October 12, 2007 at 6:17
Salazar said he’d censure Limbaugh. Rhymes with “calenture” — Salazar has a fever, and the only prescription is more government crackdown! Snar-har-har.
jim said,
October 12, 2007 at 6:30
Best. Title. Ever.
objectivelypro said,
October 12, 2007 at 6:33
When cringer bends binger
Then injure Henninger
Paddy Mac said,
October 12, 2007 at 6:36
“Now explain to me again why it is such a bad thing that Rupert Murdoch is buying the Wall Street Journal.”
Who said it was a bad thing? I subscribed to the Journal for many years, and I had to watch in horror as one editorial after another after another after another after another (slaps own face, shakes head, pauses, continues) was completely contradicted by the very news stories upon which said editorials were supposedly based. (You liberals have no sympathy for the WSJ’s editorial writers, who are always and forever getting jacked by reality, with its well-known liberal bias.) Now that The Rupe has bought his way into power, those helpless wingnut-welfare queens– er, rock-ribbed All-American conservatives– need never again fear a mere news column contradicting their most cherished beliefs. And since nothing in this world matters more than the poor widdle feewings of Journalanimalsms’s proponents (really; just ask them) Sir Rupe’s rescue comes not a moment too soon. Ayn Rand’s auto-worshiping True Individualists need nothing so much as a trust-funded sugar daddy to save their large, pasty, sagging butts, and Rupey Boy is their boy! (MAN! I mean MAN! Mark Foley, get out of my head!)
Howie Mandel said,
October 12, 2007 at 7:00
Poop is a palindrome.
Do I get paid now or after the meal ?
Kathleen said,
October 12, 2007 at 7:20
motherfucker, I want more rhyming!
Some Guy said,
October 12, 2007 at 7:22
Wasn’t there a Seinfeld episode about rhymes?
rustle said,
October 12, 2007 at 7:53
My grade 11 pome (written in Physics class)
Alas alack what is my fate
I stumbled on some u238
It sat on my hand glowing silvery green
then it fell to the floor, my hand I mean
thank you, thank you
lobbey said,
October 12, 2007 at 7:55
I’m with Lesley on this, Viagra is recommended for folk with heart problems (in fact, I Thailand, where I used to live, they used to lose about one old man a week that od’ed on Viagra), and old Rush looks as if he is in heart attack territory. While not wishing for anyone’s early demise, would it not be, at least, ironic, if Rush had the big one during rumpy after od’ing on Viagra.
lobbey said,
October 12, 2007 at 7:58
damn that preview button, it would be worth using, I obviously meant Viagra is not recommended…
the_millionare_lebowski said,
October 12, 2007 at 8:03
Limbaugh has sex?!?
Somewhere, Darwin is confounded.
zython said,
October 12, 2007 at 9:07
Limbaugh has sex?!?
Well, not for free, of course.
RandomObserver said,
October 12, 2007 at 9:18
“Colorado’s Sen. Salazar went so far last week as to say he’d support a Senate vote to “censure” Mr. Limbaugh. Rhymes with censor.”
http://smartest-thing-ever.ytmnd.com/
RandomObserver said,
October 12, 2007 at 9:24
“Senator Salazar” …or….”80s rocker Pat Benatar”? Mere coincidence?
anangryoldbroad said,
October 12, 2007 at 12:33
I think that’s “56 yr old,multi millionaire,Republican drug addict,Rush Limbaugh”. Not that it matters.
Larry said,
October 12, 2007 at 14:43
It’s a bad thing that Murdoch is buying the Journal because the paper’s reporting is arguably the best of any American paper, and when he gets the paper the reporting may become as bad as the editorials.
Pere Ubu said,
October 12, 2007 at 14:43
Censure, said the censor! Censure, said the censor!
Tension, apprehension and dissention are now done, sir!
Clif said,
October 12, 2007 at 14:46
Actually, Larry, I agree that there is fine reporting done by the WSJ off the editorial pages and that Murdoch does threaten that. My question was meant more as a snarky rhetorical question than a real one.
Frederick said,
October 12, 2007 at 14:47
“Sex tourist,” is that you guys’s way of knocking the free market again?
Larry said,
October 12, 2007 at 14:53
Okey dokey ….
Qetesh the Abyssinian said,
October 12, 2007 at 15:00
Can anyone help me out here: what rhymes with “complete and utter knobbesticke”?
Qetesh the Abyssinian said,
October 12, 2007 at 15:01
BTW, love that wee green amphibian thingie. What is that?
TR said,
October 12, 2007 at 15:05
Does someone need to explain that there’s a reason why “censor” and “censure” are different words? That they mean different things? To censor means to stop someone from saying something, while to censure means to let your displeasure with someone else’s statement be known.
A censure isn’t oppressing someone’s free speech, it’s responding to free speech with free speech of your own.
Marc said,
October 12, 2007 at 15:05
Can anyone help me out here: what rhymes with “complete and utter knobbesticke”?
Daniel Henninger?
Clif said,
October 12, 2007 at 15:17
Qetesh, the green thing is the Geico Gecko, a smarmy mascot for the Geico Insurance Company.
Robert M. said,
October 12, 2007 at 15:31
Look, it’s simple: census and censor kind of sound the same, so clearly they mean the same thing. You liberals and your ivory-tower book learning… next you’ll be trying to convince the American people that there are two different kinds of Muslims, and they don’t particularly like each other. Where will your perfidy* end?
*Which almost rhymes with untidy, so all liberals are slobs.
MzNicky said,
October 12, 2007 at 15:34
I love how this guy characterizes Reid and Salazar as “agents of state authority,” like they donned brownshirts and jackboots, stormed Phlegmball’s studio and beat him to a pulp with cudgels.
(They didn’t do that, did they? Dammit.)
MzNicky said,
October 12, 2007 at 15:43
Besides which, boo hoo hoo poor Rush, being “censored” and all by someone finally actually calling him out on his horseshit assholery. As if anyone has ever kept him from bloviating whatever vomitous hatebag lies and slanders he decides to pull out of his fat ass to regurgitate all over the airwaves for 20 fucking years or whatever. God I hate these fucking fuckers.
Jon H said,
October 12, 2007 at 15:47
“Now explain to me again why it is such a bad thing that Rupert Murdoch is buying the Wall Street Journal.”
Because the news content has been pretty decent, and not uncommonly saying things contradicting the effluent on the editorial pages.
Since people have learned to trust, and therefore actually *use* the information on the news pages, it could be a bad thing if the WSJ’s news stories start being passed through a politicized, cheerleading-for-corruption Neal Cavuto-izing filter.
g said,
October 12, 2007 at 15:52
well, it’s a serious threat to free speech. Because I’m sure the frail, timid executives at Clear Channel are all quaking in their boots over a Senate censure.
Southern Beale said,
October 12, 2007 at 16:03
And the beat goes on: Our liberal media wants you to think Democrats need to be vaccinated before attending NASCAR races.
J— said,
October 12, 2007 at 16:15
Colorado’s Sen. Salazar went so far last week as to say he’d support a Senate vote to “censure” Mr. Limbaugh. Rhymes with censor.
But it really, really rhymes with denture. Salazar wants to take away Limbaugh’s teeth and replace them with fake ones! But fear not, brave wingnuts, for it will take more than that to defang Rush.
klyde said,
October 12, 2007 at 16:29
Censure rhymes with censor if you’re a moron. Oh wait we’re talking about a US right winger.
FlipYrWhig said,
October 12, 2007 at 16:40
Qetesh, the green thing is the Geico Gecko
And in one of the commercials, he explains that he’s the mascot because “GEICO” sounds like “gecko.” Even a Cockney-accented CGI lizard knows the difference between “sounds like” and “rhymes.”
Fishbone McGonigle said,
October 12, 2007 at 16:42
“Senator Salazar” …or….”80s rocker Pat Benatar”? Mere coincidence?
I laughed at this. I’m not sure why.
El Cid said,
October 12, 2007 at 16:46
If every single radio station, TV station, newspaper, and magazine in the entire US were owned by a conglomerate formed by Fox News, the Republican National Congress, the Federalist Society, and the American Enterprise Institute; and the same conglomerate has replaced every single elementary, middle, and high school teacher and college professor with their Liberty University educated replacements, minus 1…
…and that 1 remaining professor were liberal…
…they would still be whining about the liberal establishment keeping conservatives down.
M.Sphinx said,
October 12, 2007 at 17:07
Clearly, the MoveOn resolution was totally different. It didn’t rhyme with anything.
Hey, Petraeus is hard to rhyme yo.
Spokane Moderate said,
October 12, 2007 at 17:10
Rush. Rhymes with lush.
objectivelypro said,
October 12, 2007 at 17:11
If every single radio station, TV station, newspaper, and magazine in the entire US were owned by a conglomerate formed by Fox News, the Republican National Congress, the Federalist Society, and the American Enterprise Institute…
,,,would we notice a difference?
Spirula said,
October 12, 2007 at 17:22
And the beat goes on: Our liberal media wants you to think Democrats need to be vaccinated before attending NASCAR races.
Heard that on CNN this AM and did a double take. Stupid fuckers.
Besides, as every good Southerner knows, you don’t need to be vaccinated before attending a NASCAR event, you need to get pithed.
sophie brown said,
October 12, 2007 at 17:28
rush also rhymes with flush
Olexicon said,
October 12, 2007 at 17:30
Puck Race?
Truck MAce?
Muck Trace?
Cluck Embrace?
steve EVfuture said,
October 12, 2007 at 17:43
The real problem here is that he puts the question to Hillary Clinton. I don’t care about Hillary Clinton, I’m not voting for Hillary Clinton and the reason the question is put to Hillary Clinton is that the right-wingers want the election to be against Hillary Clinton, the only candidate (Democrat or Republican) that can get the right-wing base worked up enough to vote.
mikey said,
October 12, 2007 at 18:14
Hey, Petraeus is hard to rhyme yo.
I’m gonna stick with the old standby, “Betray Us”.
You can’t beat the classics.
Just ask Rod Stewart….
mikey
Tara the anti-social social worker said,
October 12, 2007 at 18:30
“Look, it’s simple: census and censor kind of sound the same, so clearly they mean the same thing.”
That would make it a homonym. Which sounds like….
Lesly said,
October 12, 2007 at 18:30
Now explain to me again why it is such a bad thing that Rupert Murdoch is buying the Wall Street Journal.
You’re quoting an article on the Opinion Journal. It ain’t the same thing. WSJ may be virulently pro-capitalist, but they’re reality-based, not “Waaaah dis not faer!” shilling political fools.
Clif said,
October 12, 2007 at 18:38
Lesley,
I linked to the Opinion Journal site because it’s non-subscription. But the article also appeared on page A20 of the WSJ and appears on the paid subscription required WSJ web site:
Link
I also said earlier that my question about Murdoch was snarky rhetorical and that I fully agreed that the real reporting in the WSJ was top notch and would be endangered by Murdoch.
Legalize said,
October 12, 2007 at 18:38
Wow, Stalkin’ Malkin is still going on about the Frosts:
http://michellemalkin.com/2007/10/12/question-for-grown-ups-who-deserves-government-subsidized-health-insurance/
You see, the Frosts really are rich rich rich, lazy, st00pid, etc. Guess how Michelle knows. Why, she received an anonymous, “unsolicited” email to that effect!!
MCH said,
October 12, 2007 at 18:42
You see, the Frosts really are rich rich rich, lazy, st00pid, etc. Guess how Michelle knows. Why, she received an anonymous, “unsolicited” email to that effect!!
Michelle also knows that pills give you a two-foot dick!!!1! AND that 9/11 was an inside job!!1! AND lots of good stock tips!!1!!1!
Righteous Bubba said,
October 12, 2007 at 18:46
Has nobody pointed out that censure starts with C and that rhymes with P and that stands for Pool?
MzNicky said,
October 12, 2007 at 18:55
Wow. That Malkin thing really is a pissy l’il pus-bucket, in’t she? I mean, damn. I once had a part pit-bull/part boxer that was smarter than this, cuz unlike the Malkintent she always knew when to let go. Actually she was smarter than Stalkin’ Malkin in just about every way, now’s I think about it. Plus she was sweet-natured, and beautiful.
Damn, I miss that dog.
fluffy said,
October 12, 2007 at 18:58
Hey – check out this cool device that can distinguish between a sentient human and a dummy (mannequin) riding together in the same car. Isn’t a Malkin a form of mannequin (dummy)? How would she read out on this, I wonder?
Also, this would be a good device for instantly ID’ing LOLcon and GOP straw men as they whiz past. I believe a ‘Malkin’ is a scarecrow, come to think of it, which is after all brainless and made of straw.
http://www.technologyreview.com/Infotech/19523/
Snorghagen said,
October 12, 2007 at 19:00
That’s right! There’s trouble in Wingnut City.
Rufus said,
October 12, 2007 at 19:02
I think he means they both share the Latin root word, “cens,” meaning “judge.” It’s like saying “carnival” and “carnivore” rhyme because they both share the Latin root word for “flesh.” So, if Senator Reid says Rush’s show is like a carnival of bad taste, it means he thinks Rush eats a lot of spoiled meat on the air. Or something.
g said,
October 12, 2007 at 19:07
Stalkin’ Malkin is still going on about the Frosts
So now she’s relying on gossip from the neighbors? Journalism reaches a new frontier as Gladys Kravitz phones in a story from behind the curtains in the front room.
FlipYrWhig said,
October 12, 2007 at 19:22
I think he means they both share the Latin root word, “cens,” meaning “judge.”
You know, it also sounds similar to “censer,” which must mean that Salazar ritualistically worships criticism of Rush Limbaugh. But that ain’t scented smoke he’s dealing…
freddy said,
October 12, 2007 at 19:26
Maybe if the Frost family dip their fingers in purple ink they can stand around waiting for the Bremer Express Cash Delivery pick -up truck without hearing a peep out of Malkin.
Tara the anti-social social worker said,
October 12, 2007 at 19:28
“I think he means they both share the Latin root word, “cens,” meaning “judge.”
You know, it also sounds similar to “censer,” which must mean that Salazar ritualistically worships criticism of Rush Limbaugh. But that ain’t scented smoke he’s dealing…”
Upon hearing this, Henninger was truly incensed.
Doctorb Science said,
October 12, 2007 at 19:29
“Salazar” … almost rhymes with “Sewer Czar (we will besmirch the city to its knees!)”. And “Harry Reid” rhymes with “El Seed”. “Daniel Henninger” is obviously The Hotel Manager.
That’s about all I got.
Kathleen said,
October 12, 2007 at 22:17
That would make it a homonym. Which sounds like….
LOL. awesome, Tara.
Consequences at deschutesdemocrats.org said,
October 14, 2007 at 20:10
[...] you and your party get to pick up the tab for the likes of Ann Coulter and RedState and Malkin and “Pills” Limbaugh and their ilk. Is that really the face of the GOP that you want oozing out there day in, day out? I [...]