9
Also for: apple pie and kittens
Clif reminds us (thanks a lot for that) of the existence of The New Media Journal and so off we go to make friends. For example, Armand C. Hale:
I am for business. It drives the U.S. economy.
Yeah, way to take a stand there, Armand. Given his ability to say what he thinks regardless of the consequences, surely Armand also has lots of good “advice:”
How Can I Find American Made Items?
[...] Do something as simple as checking the “label” of the item to see where it’s made.
Yes, checking the “label” — why didn’t we think of that?
Soon after that, “made in America” starting to be the butt of jokes among consumers/customers who were noticing American quality in goods were starting to tank big time.
To say nothing of the decline in the quality of the grammars.
In the last 10 years I have never seen such an explosion in Chinese products.
Well then, there ain’t nothing to worry about, is there?
At the very least we won’t have to worry about lead paint in products if we can stick to our guns.
Only about bullets in our vital organs.
Unrelated but way funnier — Chris Monks:
Saw Clarence Thomas on “60 Minutes” this past weekend. Reminded me of this thing I wrote about him way back when I was a wee blogger. Here, enjoy it all over again and try to convince yourself that this is not a rerun, but instead a re-return to a happy fun time that feels all re-new and re-stuff. This is the first in a year-long (or longer) series of tributes to me and my blog, titled “A Tribute and Look Back on the Wonderfulness of the Last 5 Years or So Type Thing.” Enjoy. Or at the very least endure.
Excerpts From Clarence Thomas’ Upcoming Memoir (First posted 1/10/03) [...]
From Pg. 203:
“I have been criticized for my judicial decisions over the years, but the hardest part of making decisions is to maintain the courage of your convictions. I urge all young people to have courage and not to be afraid in the face of controversy. With that said, here then, are my top ten girl-on-girl-action adult movies of 2002…”
This post is dedicated to the notion that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery even though it turns out to be the laziest form of blog writing.
t4toby said,
October 9, 2007 at 0:54
I am for ponies. They drive the Iraq War.
Randal Graves said,
October 9, 2007 at 0:57
Do something as simple as checking the “label” of the item to see where it’s made.
Like the American shirts made in the Northern Mariana Islands. It may be slave labor, but, dammit, it’s our slave labor!
Left_Wing_Fox said,
October 9, 2007 at 1:14
Yep, just as easily as checking the label…
India, Laos, Pakistan, India, China, China, China, Mexico, India, Honduras, China, Guatamala, Saudi Arabia…
The only place in the entire town that has any clothing still made in Canada is Mark’s Work Wearhouse, and even that selection has been shrinking the last 6 years.
The funny thing is that only the store brand is made in Canada. The jeans sell for about $30 a pair. The “Brand Name” jeans they sell are $30-70 per pair, yeat all of them are made overseas in potential sweatshops.
Screw Free Trade. Give me Fair Trade: Charge overseas companies tariffs that they can eliminate by increasing their environmental and labour standards to the stricter standards of the importer. I want to be sure that when I buy a shirt that says “Made in China”, that I’m actually improving the quality of life for workers in that country, rather than participating in the race to the bottom.
Doctorb Science said,
October 9, 2007 at 1:33
“Where is the outcry from the Left?” I mean, I realize it’s only been nearly eight years since the WTO protests in Seattle, but if you’re going to rhetorically ask “where is the outcry from so-and-so” on your internet thingie, doesn’t it make sense to spend fifteen seconds on Google first?
My Dad has refused for years to buy stuff made in China, mainly due to their labor laws. I was all about the “made in the USA” label, at least until I learned about the Northern Marianas.
Pvt. Joker said,
October 9, 2007 at 1:37
Holy crap, where do you find these fools? It’s like you’re digging for the platonic ideal of retarded writing. He bitches about the passing of good old days when there was a repairman for every appliance. He asks and answers his own questions. His spell check feature is “strangely slient” about errors. His only authority is Wikipedia. He formulates strange phrases (”boxing character ‘Rocky Balboa’ of the movies”). He blames the nebulous “regulation” without telling us if it’s child labor laws or workplace safety rules that he dislikes. What a freaking perfect storm of stupid.
Strange Forces said,
October 9, 2007 at 1:39
The “I am for business” line is like the Madden soundbites in his many and varied videogames, where he says, “To win this game, one of the teams is going to have to score some points!”
Thanks, scoop.
fardels bear said,
October 9, 2007 at 1:45
OK, I found a way to relate the two unrelated posts herein. How about if the top girl-on-girl adult movie of 2002 is “Checking the Labia.” Get it? Get it? Har!
Righteous Bubba said,
October 9, 2007 at 1:51
I am for engines. They move my car.
Pere Ubu said,
October 9, 2007 at 1:54
“Where is the outcry from the Left?” I mean, I realize it’s only been nearly eight years since the WTO protests in Seattle, but if you’re going to rhetorically ask “where is the outcry from so-and-so” on your internet thingie, doesn’t it make sense to spend fifteen seconds on Google first?
Aren’t the same people who whine about the lack of “outcry from the Left” on this subject the same ones who’ve been telling us to shut the fuck up and sit in the corner and be good quite citizens for the last six years, when they’re not accusing us of being buddies with assholes like Pat Buchanan (and therefore tainted with his anti-Semitism) who are right on this particular subject but neverthless should rightfully be shunned as modern-day Know-Nothing nativists?
And no, they don’t spend any time with Teh Great Gazoogle, any more than CNN does.
mikey said,
October 9, 2007 at 1:57
I am for fiber. It moves my bowels….
mikey
Righteous Bubba said,
October 9, 2007 at 2:04
I am for feet. I walk on them.
Raznor said,
October 9, 2007 at 2:09
Me, I’m against business, as I hate the economy.
Also I’m against the use of money to exchange for goods and services. If the barter system was good for Jesus it’s good for me. How many heads of cattle for a new car?
Chan said,
October 9, 2007 at 2:10
An Ode To My Legs, Upon Which I Walk:
I’ve got two legs from my hips to the ground
And when I move ‘em they walk around
And when I lift ‘em they climb the stairs
And when I shave ‘em they ain’t got hairs
mikey said,
October 9, 2007 at 2:10
I am for female genitalia.
Um, at least I used to be.
Dammit…
mikey
caliph garrett said,
October 9, 2007 at 2:11
It drives the U.S. economy.
It puts the lotion in the basket.
Herr Doktor Bimler said,
October 9, 2007 at 2:12
I am for feet.
Iamb for feet!
I am also for beer, because it tastes like beer.
mikey said,
October 9, 2007 at 2:13
I’ve got two legs from my hips to the ground
And when I move ‘em they walk around
And when I lift ‘em they climb the stairs
And when I shave ‘em they ain’t got hairs
And when I tattoo ‘em, they’re green and blue
And when I count ‘em, let’s see. One. Two.
When I hike in shorts they get a rash
When I get drunk with my machete, they get a gash…
mikey
Righteous Bubba said,
October 9, 2007 at 2:15
I am for slave-drivers. They drive the slaves.
Ken Lay said,
October 9, 2007 at 2:44
I’m pro-business too!
John Rigas said,
October 9, 2007 at 2:46
I’m pro-business!
Bernie Ebbers said,
October 9, 2007 at 2:47
Me too!
Dick Cheney said,
October 9, 2007 at 2:53
Ken, John, Bernie: If any of you pikers were really “pro-business”, you wouldn’t have gotten caught.
Or at least you’d have come up with better lies after you were caught.
Pikers.
mikey said,
October 9, 2007 at 2:55
Can I just say here that if the people who populate the eHarmony television commercials are representative of the people I might meat on that site, I’m gonna stick to weird building projects, the intert00bz and masturbation. Because those are some unpleasant looking folks….
Sorry.
You were saying?
mikey
Lesley said,
October 9, 2007 at 2:59
I witnessed the physical manifestation of wingnuttia in my neighbourhood today. A middle-aged loudmouth, not watching where he was going on a two-lane pedestrian walkway, kept slamming into oncoming people. At every slam he’d curse the people he slammed into as if his bumbling idiocy was their fault.
"Oh Stewardess, I Speak 'Nut" said,
October 9, 2007 at 3:07
When nuts say they are “for” business, what they mean is they are for war, because war drives the economy. (See: Dow 14,000.) I believe it was Santa Clausewitz who said, “War is just the extension of commerce by other means.”
Marita said,
October 9, 2007 at 3:13
C’mon, Sadlynauts. Help me out here. The nomination for Funniest Blog that is currently getting the most votes is the nom for DUmmie FUnnies. Do I have to horrify you with an example of their humor?
OK, don’t say I didn’t warn you. Take this:
If you all don’t go over there and add your nominations, or vote for the S,N! nominations that are already up, I’ll post another one of DUFU’s jokes.
I’ll do it. I will.
kobie said,
October 9, 2007 at 3:15
I am for the Bills kicking the Cowboys’ ass tonight.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
October 9, 2007 at 3:37
OK Marita, ya got me. Of course, you won’t read this post until tomorrow, if then.
Lesley said,
October 9, 2007 at 4:01
I am for humour in bear alert notices to the public.
(I added my nomination for SadlyNo.)
Me said,
October 9, 2007 at 4:06
Labelling products. Feh. Another liberal idea, and look where it’s gotten us? We have to read “Made in China” on everything. I told you liberals were bad!
mikey said,
October 9, 2007 at 4:11
Yeah, maybe, but do you even realize how many perimeter and area defense weapons can be made from drano?
Ok. I’m in a very dark place tonight.
But I’m going to pan-roast a duck breast, make a winter squash puree with cinamon and maple syrup and bake some dinner rolls.
And then, I’ll be all peaceful and accepting and shit…
Sure….
mikey
Lame Man said,
October 9, 2007 at 4:21
Second mikey’s take on e-harmony. Can’t hit the mute button fast enough. Fucking pod people/
shane's dentist's attorney's bookie said,
October 9, 2007 at 4:23
I am objectively pro shoes for industry.
shoes for today,
shoes for feet, feet for legs,
shoes for brakes.
kingubu said,
October 9, 2007 at 4:25
Damn, mikey, I was gonna invite myself over to help you out with that duck breast but it sounds like a wrong turn on the way to the bog carries the risk of intimate contact with a homemade Claymore. Yikes.
shane's dentist's attorney's bookie said,
October 9, 2007 at 4:30
I am objectively pro jerk-people finding each other.
Lost damsels forage,
Men hunt sex for large trailer,
Schmoes find true love.
Fishbone McGonigle said,
October 9, 2007 at 4:30
Me, I’m against business, as I hate the economy.
Me too. The Economy had sex with my wife, and then ran over my dog when it was leaving my house.
kingubu said,
October 9, 2007 at 4:33
Noises for Teh Leg.
Fuck the cowbell. What this world needs is more theremin.
shane's dentist's attorney's bookie said,
October 9, 2007 at 4:36
I am objectively pro gigantic self-propelled bar-b-q’s
Ginormous grill,
Cooking v-396 hemi,
Hot dog on gear shift.
Joba Chamberlain said,
October 9, 2007 at 4:37
http://www.allamericanclothing.com/
Good outfit, I’ve ordered many times. Somehow I don’t think that would satisfy teh wingnuts, cuz’ all these clothes are union-made.
mikey said,
October 9, 2007 at 4:50
Joba, if I could wear a pair of those Duck Coveralls every goddam day?
Otherwise I wanna live in the tropics.
A pair of shorts, or those serious goddam coveralls.
Everything else is just pretense…
Kathleen said,
October 9, 2007 at 4:51
I am for hamsters. They drive the intertubes.
GoatBoy said,
October 9, 2007 at 4:56
I am for external use only. In the case of accidental ingestion flush with water and seek medical attention.
Righteous Bubba said,
October 9, 2007 at 4:57
I am for gerbils. They power the Richard Gere rumor mill.
mikey said,
October 9, 2007 at 4:59
I am for skin.
It gives me an excuse….
mikey
jcricket said,
October 9, 2007 at 5:10
here’s a label ol’ cliff should read:
http://www.lepow.com/tag/
jcricket said,
October 9, 2007 at 5:13
Oh, sorry. Clif is a good guy. My bad.
Matt T. said,
October 9, 2007 at 5:13
Fuck the cowbell. What this world needs is more theremin.
No, we don’t. I once saw a cowpunk band that prominently featured a theremin. They covered “Free Bird”. Fucking nailed it, too, and trust me, I know that solo. Everything else is just…lacking.
And I’ll back up them duck-hunting coveralls. Warm and snug, yet plenty of freedom of movement, which is extremely important when hunting the wiley duck. Or, more acurately, avoiding the wiley game warden because your shotgun isn’t properly choked off.
mikey said,
October 9, 2007 at 5:15
Or you’re fishing with Salutes in bottles….
mikey
Left_Wing_Fox said,
October 9, 2007 at 5:25
http://nosweatapparel.com/ is another one
g said,
October 9, 2007 at 5:42
Gawd. You’re all drunk here! Drunker than me!
mikey said,
October 9, 2007 at 5:44
Damn.
That sucks.
For YOU!!
(Go Indians)
mikey
Lesley said,
October 9, 2007 at 5:49
I bought a pair of No Sweat black and white sneakers several years ago. Still wear ‘em. They’re well made.
Taiga Works‘ Gortex and fleece apparel is made in Canada. It’s better made and cheaper than the made-in-China crap Mountain Equipment Co-op sells. It also comes with a lifetime guarantee.
AkaDad said,
October 9, 2007 at 5:53
I am for business. That’s why I sell crack…
Legalize said,
October 9, 2007 at 5:58
Personally, I am all for water – it cures my hangovers!
Robert Green said,
October 9, 2007 at 6:00
I am for motherfucking asswipe right wing retards learning when (and infinitely more importantly, when NOT) to use “quotes”. like that there, for instance, is fucking wrong.
i’m also for people paying me millions of dollars to do very little except sit around drinking johnny walker blue label, or maybe a 35 year old glenlivet.
M. Bouffant said,
October 9, 2007 at 6:01
Whatever it is, I’m against it.
Matt T. said,
October 9, 2007 at 6:05
g,
Nope. I quit drinkin’ almost three years ago, now. I am stoned, however, and I may go watch Horse Feathers for the seven millionth time. “Everyone says I love you…”
Humor Me said,
October 9, 2007 at 6:18
I am for sex, when I am involved.
I am also for drinking.
I am conditionally for theramin, the condition being it cannot be playing “freebird”.
mikey said,
October 9, 2007 at 6:23
I am for Bruce Springsteen.
The Cleveland Indians.
And Gigawatt amplifiers.
That go to _______________.
Sure….
mikey
AkaDad said,
October 9, 2007 at 6:27
I am for women who don’t know what chloroform is…
Some Guy said,
October 9, 2007 at 6:50
or a delicious roofie colada.
In bad mood. Various reasons.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Sx0Qc18RHE
Enjoy Pumaman.
DEMIZE! said,
October 9, 2007 at 6:50
I am for the war,against the troops.
Doodle Bean said,
October 9, 2007 at 6:53
Chloroform because that is the only way you can get you some, akadad and some guy?
Although I s’pose you’d “get some” in prison…
DEMIZE! said,
October 9, 2007 at 6:54
I am also for the invisible hand of the free market,caressing my nether regions.OOH! a significant gain in my private sector….
AkaDad said,
October 9, 2007 at 7:13
Chloroform because that is the only way you can get you some, akadad
I’m glad to see you got the joke…
Lesley said,
October 9, 2007 at 7:17
Mark Steyn outdoes himself – see TBogg.
Johnny Coelacanth said,
October 9, 2007 at 7:28
I am for stuff too. Notably, I am a for apple, and j for jacks.
Herr Doktor Bimler said,
October 9, 2007 at 7:35
I am conditionally for theramin
I tried some of that theramin once, but it just kept me awake for 36 hours.
Dr Zen said,
October 9, 2007 at 8:43
I is for looking with.
objectivelypro said,
October 9, 2007 at 8:50
I am for dirt. It absorbs the manure.
Johnny Coelacanth said,
October 9, 2007 at 9:02
I am for manure. It grows the flowers.
Herr Doktor Bimler said,
October 9, 2007 at 9:33
I am for paintings by Colin McCahon.
kingubu said,
October 9, 2007 at 9:39
I am 4′5″. Because seven ate nine.
Lesley said,
October 9, 2007 at 10:05
I am for hyacinths but not hyacinth girls. Ugh, click with caution.
owlbear1 said,
October 9, 2007 at 10:10
I am floored:
“A more basic point is made very robustly by Kathy Shaidle: Advanced western democracies have delivered the most prosperous societies in human history. There simply are no longer genuinely “poor” people in sufficient numbers. As Miss Shaidle points out, if you’re poor today, it’s almost always for behavioral reasons – behavior which the state chooses not to discourage but to reward. Nonetheless, progressive types persist in deluding themselves that there are vast masses of the “needy” out there that only the government can rescue.”
http://corner.nationalreview.com/post/?q=YzgyZWFiOTkxMTJiMTBlMGNkYTgyOTViZGIxNjQ0YjY=
Lesley said,
October 9, 2007 at 10:54
Yes, Owlbear, and did you know that (Canadian) Kathy Shaidle lived on welfare (disability) benefits for four years because she suffers from lupus? Yes, the same Kathy Shaidle who despises the poor and subsidized health care, had this to say about her experience at a Family Benefits office in Toronto:
Poor Kathy. But what’s a freshly showered good Catholic girl with lupus gonna do, rail at God for the lupus that drove her to the welfare office, as well as her plain appearance? (Yes, she’s bitter about that, too. If she had Coulter’s good looks she might get a teevee gig on Fox.) Blame the poor!
At least she had some shame about her hatreds then.
It seems Kathy’s self-hatred has evolved over time. In the 1980s she was part of the peace movement and marched with thousands of others to protest the arms race. Today she blames the poor for their misfortunes, admires George Bush, his glorious war, and the American free market health care system.
I’m guessing her need for welfare was the turning point in her self-loathing.
Of course, Kathy will never move to the USA because Canada’s health care system takes care of Kathy’s medical needs without Kathy having to spend much. If she’s like most Canadians, her health insurance (probably OHIP) costs between $35 and $75 a month – that is if you’re not on welfare or unemployed. Those folks don’t have to pay for health insurance.
The government insurer won’t reject her like some private outfit because she has lupus.
Yep, all you need be is a resident to receive coverage and how much you pay depends on whether you are employed or not. If you are employed (as most people are), it’s still a pittance. I know, I’m an employed Canadian and my insurance costs me $35.00 a month. With that I get a semi-private hospital room, as many doctors visits a year as I need, all surgery not deemed to be cosmetic, and 80% of my prescriptions covered plus a whole lot of other stuff.
Weird how she hates what she directly benefits from, eh?
Lesley said,
October 9, 2007 at 11:00
I should add that Kathy has a huge crush on Mark Steyn and he’d reject her if she admired social welfare programs.
Lesley said,
October 9, 2007 at 11:18
Here’s Kathy’s essay on applying for welfare benefits. Although she’s honest about her background and the grinding shame that accompanies poverty, her lack of self-awareness and compassion (for self) is profound.
Qetesh the Abyssinian said,
October 9, 2007 at 11:27
Do something as simple as checking the “label” of the item to see where it’s made.
Excusez moi, cheri, but what ees zees “label” of which you speak? Must I wear ze trenchcoat like Alain Delon, so we can whisper in ze shadows about zees? I ‘ave not ‘eard of a “label”, you see, for in my poor country (vive la France, cheri) we only ‘as labels. And labia, of course, being far more sexee zan you un-’appy Americans.
Au ‘voir, cheri, I must go and ‘ave a baguette and some champagne wiz my friends Pierre and Jacque and Eloise. Good luck wiz ze “label”-checking.
Qetesh the Abyssinian said,
October 9, 2007 at 11:32
There simply are no longer genuinely “poor” people in sufficient numbers. As Miss Shaidle points out, if you’re poor today, it’s almost always for behavioral reasons – behavior which the state chooses not to discourage but to reward.
Owlbear, it’s quite simple: because of Teh Capitalism, there are no longer any losers, only winners! Hurrah! Ponies and blow jobs for everybody! All that blather about ’survival of the fittest’ and ‘competition in a free market’ and all that, oh, okay, I know that’s part of the conservative prayer book, but really, what happens in the markets today is that there are winners, winningers, and winningest, and the only ones who suffer do so because they’re not following the rules.
So it’s all hunky dory, y’see?
Major Woody said,
October 9, 2007 at 11:54
You are for business, eh?
Well, I got yer business right here!
bjacques said,
October 9, 2007 at 12:33
I am for winning the cold civil war. It’ll drive the Right nuts(ier).
I’m also for theremins. They are the soundtrack to the future.
tigrismus said,
October 9, 2007 at 14:41
I’m for business unless you own your own and can’t afford insurance. Then, get a REAL job, mofo. Maybe working for some foreign-owned company, I hear they’re doing pretty well.
Dan Someone said,
October 9, 2007 at 16:21
Kirk, I am for you.
Non Nato said,
October 9, 2007 at 17:11
Business drives the economy alright.. Into to the ground that is
mdhatter said,
October 9, 2007 at 17:51
“In the last 10 years I have never seen such an explosion in Chinese products.”
they’re exploding now? is it the plastique paint?
Righteous Bubba said,
October 9, 2007 at 18:12
they’re exploding now? is it the plastique paint?
I think it is of no small import to this great nation that THE CHINESE INVENTED EXPLODING STUFF!!!
Bunnyfiend said,
October 9, 2007 at 22:25
I don’t like sex and drugs
I don’t like waterbugs
I don’t like Burker King
I don’t like anything
And I’m against it!
Fred Fnord said,
October 12, 2007 at 3:27
I am faw yeahs owd.