26
I think we know what this calls for…
We learn in this report that a whopping 6 percent of Iraqis have “a great deal” of confidence in US and British forces. An additional 12 percent have “quite a lot.” 30 Percent say they have “not very much.” And 52 percent say “none at all.” The Iraqi police, the Iraqi army, local political leaders, the national government, and the local militia are all more popular than the American military. A clear majority thinks the US government, rather than the Iraqi government, is controlling the country. 46 percent of Iraqis “strongly oppose” the presence of American troops in Iraq and 32 percent are somewhat opposed. 69 percent say the American presence is making things worse. More Iraqis see Iran as having a positive influence on their country than see the US that way. For that matter, more Iraqis see Saudi Arabia as having a positive influence. More Iraqis see Russia as having a positive influence. 51 percent say attacks on coalition forces are acceptable. More people blame US forces (31 percent) or President Bush (9 percent) for violence in Iraq than blame al-Qaeda (18 percent) or Iran (7 pecent).
[...]
[...]
MORE BEARS!!! MOOOOOOORE PUMAS!!!! WE CAN STILL WIN THIS THING!!!!
[Thanks to Paul for the pic.]
galactic Dustbin said,
August 26, 2007 at 18:08
what we need is Surge of Ferets- THAT ‘ll teach em!
Jillian said,
August 26, 2007 at 18:25
Release the Flying Monkeys!!
Les Izmore said,
August 26, 2007 at 18:37
Why can’t they understand we did this all for them? We need to find more grateful countries to attack and occupy…
Dr.BDH said,
August 26, 2007 at 19:13
I’m waiting for the wingnut exegesis of this survey. Something’s got to be wrong with it. Maybe they polled nonexistent Iraqi policemen. Or maybe the poll was done by mendacious American GIs. Or there’s something suspicious about the kerning. Or extra dissatisfaction was Photoshopped in. Just wait, there’s an illogical explanation for this unacceptable result.
klyde said,
August 26, 2007 at 19:20
Why do the Iraqis hate their own freedom?
mikey said,
August 26, 2007 at 19:21
61 percent of the Pumas said the Iraqis were “Very Delicious” while another 27 percent said they were “Somewhat Delicious”.
44% of the Bears reported they “Highly Preferred” Kurds over Arabs or Persians.
91% of the Bears and 79% of the Pumas said Iraq was “Too Fuckin Hot”.
22% of the Bears and 6% of the Pumas ate their interviewer before the questionnaire was completed.
mikey
Suicidal Zebra said,
August 26, 2007 at 19:24
Woah, I just got a mental image of ferrets bedecked in camouflage paint, flying into Baghdad to the on the back of monkeys with wings, to the tune of “Ride of the Valkyries”.
God damn that would put Al Queda in its place!
Michelle M. said,
August 26, 2007 at 19:25
You moonbats don’t even bother noting that the mosque in the picture with the bear is not the least bit detroyed!!!eleven11!1kerning!!
Michelle M. said,
August 26, 2007 at 19:27
That’s “destroyed” . . . I’m so focused on saving the country from islamofascimexidhimmis that I can’t be bothered to check the preview. But you can rest assured that the “s” was lost in a good cause!
Pere Ubu said,
August 26, 2007 at 19:31
Where are the frickin’ GIANT ROBOTS already!!??interrobang!
stryx said,
August 26, 2007 at 19:31
Yeah, well, just wait until we shitcan their democratically elected government leaders and replace them with our new hand-picked minions. Then the people of Iraq will understand that they control their own fate.
Emperor U.S.A. (the naked truth) said,
August 26, 2007 at 19:43
Yeah, well, just wait until we shitcan their democratically elected government leaders and replace them with our new hand-picked minions. Then the people of Iraq will understand that they control their own fate.
I recall the poet James Hetfield saying in a famous couplet: You can do it your own way / If it’s done just how I say
His Grace said,
August 26, 2007 at 19:47
I think my most surreal experience in the whole March to War of 2002-2003 was the constant bashing of France for not being grateful enough towards the US for liberating it in ‘44. Yet in the next breath these same people were expecting the Iraqis to greet the US with flowers and candy.
Although to be fair the most surreal moment was when the war bloggers wanted to show Red Dawn overseas to promote their cause.
Mark Steyn said,
August 26, 2007 at 19:55
But if you leave Bin Laden will think you are pussies! Islamists everywhere will get blood on the tongue! People will lose faith in America!
This will not happen if we stay!
mikey said,
August 26, 2007 at 20:09
Whoa! Islamists everywhere have earned red wings? Damn, maybe we CAN’T win this fight!
mikey
Matt T. said,
August 26, 2007 at 20:55
mikey,
Heh. About once every six weeks I have to explain the concept of “red wings” to one of my co-workers, generally the young female ones. Heh.
And about them bears, tell them bears I love every one of ‘em like a brother and a sister, but if they give me any trouble tonight, I’ll run every goddamn one of ‘em off this hill. ‘Cause I’m God’s Own Drunk and a fearless man.
Matt T. said,
August 26, 2007 at 21:12
Upon further reflection, that come off much creepier than I intended it to. To clarify, somehow or another “red wings” comes up in convorsation. Youthful female co-worker asks what it is and I tell her. She goes “Ewww” and we all laugh. Then I go back downstairs to finish whatever the hell I’m supposed to be doing.
Smiling Mortician said,
August 26, 2007 at 21:17
Not that you’d have noticed, but I haven’t commented lately because I am overseas, away from home, in places without reliable internet access. In other words, I am happy.
Lately I’ve been in Turkey and have been chatting with people like Kurds who weave rugs. Life is good.
Matt, I do believe you are God’s Own Drunk, but I’m making an effort with the local Raki, and I’d just like some acknowledgment.
Smotes Durston said,
August 26, 2007 at 21:33
Looks like you moonbats are finally coming around to this guy, that I seem to recall you mocking earlier:
to widen the war and take out SYRIA using Egyptian or Jordanian or Kurdish pumas in an ‘Afghanistan style’ light mammal attack and use US vampire bat supremacy to wipe out the forces of Syria wherever they appear.
From the moment allied forces hit the ground with some US Special Bears and USAF spotted owls, this force will be ‘Rolling Hot’: it will be a continuous forward assault starting from a small entry point and racing through Syria to demolish the regime there. That took two weeks in Afghanistan and three months in Iraq. Syria is the ‘weak brother’ of the Middle East and a hard case of lobbed bear turds would turn it over, so two weeks sounds about right, given that any forces we get for this will be MORE CAPABLE than the Northern Alliance of Yaks and Yetis in Afghanistan.
The modern US arsenal now will decimate any pre-2006 armored force on the battlefield via the use of Sensor Fuzed Robot Weapons. Two were used in Iraq to wipe out the ‘Elite Republican Guard’ counter attack that was forming up and demolish its forward component and cause the rest of it to flee. Time involved: 10 minutes.
Problem solved. And we wouldn’t even have to run over any dogs with the Bradleys, which we didn’t never do anyway, liars!!!!!!!!!
noen - assumptress of ubiquitous representation said,
August 26, 2007 at 21:39
Oh god no, please not the Flying Monkeys! I still have bad dreams about those things.
What are red wings? Wait…wait… no, I don’t think I want to know…
mdhatter said,
August 26, 2007 at 21:55
I wonder what the word “WOLVERINES!” looks like spray painted in arabic?
Righteous Bubba said,
August 26, 2007 at 22:01
I wonder what the word “WOLVERINES!” looks like spray painted in arabic?
It looks COOL.
His Grace said,
August 26, 2007 at 22:16
??????? ?????????
And thanks Smotes, I didn’t realize that a Jacksonian’s master plan could be improved. Sadly I think that yours has a better chance of success and less fuckupitude than his.
His Grace said,
August 26, 2007 at 22:19
Argh, I forgot that we can’t publish not-latin characters in comments. Try this link. Although, if we could get some shirts it would be awesome.
Matt T. said,
August 26, 2007 at 22:26
What are red wings? Wait…wait… no, I don’t think I want to know…
It’s actually not that bad, but I’ve been told that the very fact that I don’t thing there’s anything all that disgusting about getting one’s red wings proves there’s something seriously wrong with me. I’m not a hundred percent sure I can argue with that, to be quite honest. “Hey, that’s no thang,” I say and people tell me, “No, Matt, that’s pretty goddamn weird,” so I don’t know who to believe anymore.
mikey, you tell ‘em.
mikey said,
August 26, 2007 at 22:33
Red wings are just like the congressional medal of honor.
More than half the recipients got ‘em by accident…
mikey
MzNicky said,
August 26, 2007 at 22:38
Oh good lord.
noen - assumptress of ubiquitous representation:
“Red wings” is what one gets when one performs oral sex on a menstruating woman.
There. That wasn’t so hard, now was it, boys?
Galactic Dustbin said,
August 26, 2007 at 22:44
OK- being 40 and not in the know with what is ‘hip’ or ‘dope’ with teh kids today; what with thier baggy pants and muffin tops and high risk mortages. Why when I was a kid we wore onions on our belt ( which was the style at the time.)
So tell me- what the gorram frak is ‘getting your red wings?”
Galactic Dustbin said,
August 26, 2007 at 22:46
Thank you MzNicky. Now I can safely go back to my hobby of writing letters to the editor and telling kids to get off my lawn.
Righteous Bubba said,
August 26, 2007 at 22:50
There. That wasn’t so hard, now was it, boys?
A gentleman never speaks of such matters except in giggly euphemisms at large gatherings of other gentlemen.
MzNicky said,
August 26, 2007 at 22:56
You’re welcome, Mr. Dustbin, but it’d be dishonest to leave the impression that I’m one of those blushing young whippersnapper-ettes whose delicate ears Mr. T. gallantly wishes to protect. I’m a geezerette and a half my own self. His and mikey’s bashfuless over defining sexual terms having to do with female genitalia is actually rather charming, in an alarming kind of way.
mikey said,
August 26, 2007 at 23:06
As another member of geezerdom, I was raised in a manner well described by Mr. Bubba, and yes, I, of the world-weary wrinkles and long grey hair, would have blushed to an embarrassing degree had I been any less descrete.
‘Sides, I got an email from Sonny. It just said “Fer crissakes, mikey, shut the fuck up!”
In the words of Boz Scaggs, that was all she wrote…
mikey
Righteous Bubba said,
August 26, 2007 at 23:12
I thought the medal comparison was funny and did not make me feel less manly. A triumph.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
August 27, 2007 at 0:40
Smiling Mortician said,
August 26, 2007 at 21:17
Not that you’d have noticed, but I haven’t commented lately because I am overseas, away from home, in places without reliable internet access. In other words, I am happy.
Lately I’ve been in Turkey and have been chatting with people like Kurds who weave rugs. Life is good.
I’m in Columbus, and my brain hurts.
Notorious P.A.T. said,
August 27, 2007 at 0:55
6 percent of Iraqis have “a great deal” of confidence in US and British forces
I don’t suppose the margin of error was 6 points?
Matt T. said,
August 27, 2007 at 0:58
Now I’m a paternalistic prude on top of being a amoral deviant. Brother. Guess I’ll keep my thoughts about strap-ons to myself.
Herr Doktor Bimler said,
August 27, 2007 at 1:32
While in other news, the cut-price airline Red Wings declares bankruptcy and goes into receivership.
mikey said,
August 27, 2007 at 2:25
Really, makes you wonder what’s in Red Bull, y’know?
mikey
White, God-Fearing, Suburban said,
August 27, 2007 at 2:28
The problem with these polls is that if you asked 6-year olds, 92% would say that broccolli is bad and that cheese-pizza is good for them. We need to disregard these polls and do the needful (i.e. the tactical bio-units that you sggested). If we are serious about bringing democracy to the Middle East we can’t get distracted by polls and other non-sense. They will thank us later.
Righteous Bubba said,
August 27, 2007 at 2:47
White, God-Fearing, Suburban said,
August 27, 2007 at 2:28
…do the needful…
I usually see this phrase used by people from the Indian subcontinent.
mikey said,
August 27, 2007 at 3:08
Dammit!!
My tactical Bio-units are ALL in the cleaners today.
And my hair’s wet.
Shit…
mikey
lobbey said,
August 27, 2007 at 4:15
Although to be fair the most surreal moment was when the war bloggers wanted to show Red Dawn overseas to promote their cause.
Did that really happen? I thought I had dreamt that.
M. Bouffant said,
August 27, 2007 at 4:55
So if you’re a fan of Detroit’s NHL team…Or certain work boots?
Looked all over for an image of a red wing patch, couldn’t find any. Hells Angels©™ sometimes wear various colored wing patches as part of their colors. Just so you liberal wimps know the origin of the whole thing.
But, Mein Herr Doktor, there was/is a Russian discount airline called “Red Wings,” according to the web. (Unless you knew that already.)
Anne Laurie said,
August 27, 2007 at 6:07
Huh. I’m soooo old, the term “Red Wings” makes me think of sports in Detroit, plus the brand of work boots the team was (they told me) named after.
Those are good boots, if your footwear needs include steel toes and/or walking through corrosive stuff. Insert your own “Motown” joke here. Or your own “downtown Baghdad” joke, if you prefer…
Herr Doktor Bimler said,
August 27, 2007 at 8:02
there was/is a Russian discount airline called “Red Wings,”
I didn’t know that, despite a reasonable amount of experience with discount airlines. This time last year I experienced an AirBaltic flight into St. Petersburg… then out again, a week later, with GermanWings.
Trap for new players: Almost all international carriers flying out of St. Petersburg use the Pulkovo-2 terminal. If you book a taxi, the driver will inevitably take you to the Pulkovo-2 terminal. GermanWings are the exception, however, and for reasons best known to themselves, they fly out of Pulkovo-1.
There is no way of getting directly from one terminal to the other.
Rufus said,
August 28, 2007 at 0:26
Other poll results not included above:
Ebola, AIDS and testicular cancer are all more popular than the American military. More Iraqis see Satan as having a positive influence on their country than see the US that way. For that matter, more Iraqis see Salman Rushide novels as having a positive influence. More Iraqis see Halley’s Comet as having a positive influence.