Aug
17
17
Shorter Glenn “Instapundit” Reynolds
SCOTT BEAUCHAMP: Tip of the Iceberg.
- Beauchamp, Beauchamp, Beauchamp, Beauchamp, Beauchamp, Beauchamp, Beauchamp, Beauchamp…
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard.
[+ link]
Paul M said,
August 17, 2007 at 1:16
Reynolds, Reynolds, Reynolds, Reynolds, Reynolds, Reynolds, douchebag, douchebag
Marita said,
August 17, 2007 at 1:17
Beauchamp, Beauchamp, Beauchamp, Beauchamp, Beauchamp, Beauchamp,
Beauchamp, Beauchamp, Beauchamp, Beauchamp, Beauchamp, Beauchamp,
CHEETOS! CHEETOS!
Beauchamp, Beauchamp, Beauchamp, Beauchamp, Beauchamp, (etc)
mdhatter said,
August 17, 2007 at 1:24
I feel the need to provide this link, for the shorties
Notorious P.A.T. said,
August 17, 2007 at 1:25
Mitch Albom — In his sports column, he described alumni players at a basketball game who were not even there.
Wow, that is so much worse than saying Iraq has 500 tons of VX nerve gas and working ties with al-Qaeda.
mdhatter said,
August 17, 2007 at 1:26
Wow! That failed! try this one
Been a while since I heard that one.
tasteless said,
August 17, 2007 at 1:28
Stunningly effective use of repetition – signature device to piss on!
Stunningly effective use of repetition – signature device to piss on!
Stunningly effective use of repetition – signature device to piss on!
Stunningly effective use of repetition – signature device to piss on!
Stunningly effective use of repetition – signature device to piss on!
Stunningly effective use of repetition – signature device to piss on!
LOL!
Gary Ruppert said,
August 17, 2007 at 1:31
The fact is, Liberals repeat anti-American lies to try and make them facts, it is not working.
mdhatter said,
August 17, 2007 at 1:31
I like pie.
AkaDad said,
August 17, 2007 at 1:33
I think it’s pretty clear, if it weren’t for Scott Beauchamp, we would have won the war, and we’d all be partying in Iraq…
kobie said,
August 17, 2007 at 1:34
The fact is, Gary Ruppert is a fucking douchebag.
His Grace said,
August 17, 2007 at 1:35
I’m trying to figure out what exactly Putz is arguing here, ’cause the piece he links to has a list of 62 “journalistic” malpractices across 15 years most of which involve plagiarism or making up stories. It covers people as diverse as History’s Greatest Menace, Jimmy Carter and teh emblem of teh left, Ward Churchill.
But the point of it? I guess we’re supposed to trust Glenn Reynolds rather than people who correct their errors.
jennhi said,
August 17, 2007 at 1:44
Althouse! Althouse! Aaaalthouse!
oooooh it’s Althouse…..
tasteless said,
August 17, 2007 at 1:44
I have developed a model of Gavin’s comedic mind which accounts for the variation in his blog posts with an r-squared of 0.99. Here it is:
Gavin(x) = 6y + e
Applied to any initial input x, this model captures the full range of Gavin-related output with amazing accuracy.
Mehitabel the Abyssinian said,
August 17, 2007 at 1:52
(1) Nothing is true.
(2) ????
(3) Everything is permitted!
willis said,
August 17, 2007 at 2:07
Thanks. I feel much better about that term paper thing 40 years ago.
Nullifidian said,
August 17, 2007 at 2:19
I have developed a model of Gavin’s comedic mind which accounts for the variation in his blog posts with an r-squared of 0.99. Here it is:
Gavin(x) = 6y + e
Applied to any initial input x, this model captures the full range of Gavin-related output with amazing accuracy.
If you’re going to do fake math, don’t make it functionally meaningless. It’s not funny that way.
All it does is make your readers (or at least one reader, me) think “What the fuck is that supposed to represent?”
mikey said,
August 17, 2007 at 2:21
Ok, that’s it. I’m gonna get all geeezzed up, go kidnap a prominant wingnut, bring them back to my secret lair in an undisclosed location (alright, it’s alviso) and waterboard teh fucker repeatedly until he or she tells me, clearly and unambiguously just what exactly these Beauchamp/Jamil/altered smoke events tell us about the world, Iraq, reportage, blogs and truth.
They crow about the event like it means something very important, but they won’t come out and say what it means.
Hmm, much like “victory in iraq”. They insist upon it, but they won’t say what it is. Or what it resembles.
It is on!
mikey
Gavin M. said,
August 17, 2007 at 2:22
Gavin(x) = 6y + eieio
Marita said,
August 17, 2007 at 2:23
Gavin(x) = (6y + eieio)^lol/(yaketysax)
tasteless said,
August 17, 2007 at 2:32
LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL!
LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL!
LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL!
LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL!
LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL!
LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL!
Crissa said,
August 17, 2007 at 2:32
So, uh…
…Do you really expect me to follow that link to Renoylds?
tasteless said,
August 17, 2007 at 2:34
functionally meaningless
and therein lies the power of the model…
mikey said,
August 17, 2007 at 2:34
Gavin(IP) = 6y + (captcha/2?)
mikey
zsa said,
August 17, 2007 at 2:41
mikey ,
you have a secret lair in alviso? Is that near the taco truck or in the old cannery?
I’m betting it’s the cannery.
tasteless said,
August 17, 2007 at 2:44
LOL!
I haz ip captcha!
LOL!
LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL!
LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL!
LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL!
LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL!
LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL!
LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL!
owlbear1 said,
August 17, 2007 at 3:00
Fucking deadbeats lolling around sucking up air a good person could breath.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Pere Ubu said,
August 17, 2007 at 3:00
until he or she tells me, clearly and unambiguously just what exactly these Beauchamp/Jamil/altered smoke events tell us about the world, Iraq, reportage, blogs and truth
It means that the 500-some-odd Kurds who were blown to smithereens yesterday were actually not killed in a struggle over northern Iraqi oil resources but were killed by drooling evil mutant freedom-hating Sunnomoslebolshifasciomooninites driven by psychic eminations from the Lidless Eye Of Ahmadinejad and that’s why we gotta nuke Tehran before we’re all forced to wash before praying and cut each other’s heads off.
See? Simple.
mikey said,
August 17, 2007 at 3:07
zsa.
One word.
Baylands.
Shhh….
mikey
Simba B. said,
August 17, 2007 at 3:08
Apropos of nothing, does anyone know what’s wrong with the comments RSS? I can get the feed to download in a browser but my feed reader refuses to load it. Is anyone else having problems?
Pere Ubu said,
August 17, 2007 at 3:16
By the way, Bush still has not sent me that $38 billion for my anti-Sun particle beam to help defeat the Islamoheliofascist menace.
He’s just totally unserious about defending this country, I tell you. That horrible thing in the sky has killed once already yesterday – how many more must die before he wakes up to the threat!?!eleven
See if I ever vote for him again.
Not that I ever did, of course, but it’s the principle! FILTHY BUUUUSHES! WE HATES IT! WE HATES IT FOREVER!
sexleksaker said,
August 17, 2007 at 3:26
Tack för en mycket trevlig blog.
Notorious P.A.T. said,
August 17, 2007 at 3:51
The fact is, Liberals repeat anti-American lies to try and make them facts
You mean like “another 9/11 type terrorist attack would be good for our country”?
Can you get more anti-American than hoping terrorists attack America?
Gary Ruppert said,
August 17, 2007 at 3:56
The fact is, if there was another attack, it would likely be on a liberal place and it would cause the liberals to shut up, so I guess it would be a positive.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
August 17, 2007 at 3:57
Dancing Badgers!
Perhaps you’ll attract the dangeral perfessor.
Pere Ubu said,
August 17, 2007 at 4:00
Tack för en mycket trevlig blog.
Translation:
robble robble bullet robble Beauchamp robble dhimmitude robble robble Vienna robble sacks o’ sand robble!
By the way, did you guys know everyone’s favorite bedwetting Wal-Mart Mom is still trying to get that second five-minutes-of-fame?
owlbear1 said,
August 17, 2007 at 4:03
You do understand Gary, that by even talking about another terrorist attack it will be your fault that it happens?
Some Guy said,
August 17, 2007 at 4:08
http://www.weebls-stuff.com/toons/footy/
Me, I prefer this one.
And I want an England jersey.
Aww, is Gary being fluffy again?
lobbey said,
August 17, 2007 at 4:21
Mikey, be careful now, El Wingnuts will read this thread, and be away whining; “teh liberals want to torture us now”, next thing you, it will be appearing on Malkin, backed up by Allahpundit and quoted on Fox News, and then the spotlight will be on you.
Where will you bury the bodies then?
JK47 said,
August 17, 2007 at 4:32
“The fact is, if there was another attack… it would be a positive.”
Spoken like a true patriot.
Pere Ubu said,
August 17, 2007 at 4:38
In honor of Bedwettin’ Annie I humbly submit this.
But careful she doesn’t see it, or she’ll have to go on FAUX News and whine about it.
Pere Ubu said,
August 17, 2007 at 4:42
http://www.weebls-stuff.com/toons/footy/
“ninjas and lasers and gold”
I love that.
Pere Ubu said,
August 17, 2007 at 4:46
Oh, hell, as long as I’m dropping stuff off at random, this is the best academic analysis of the Cold War era I’ve seen.
Bet you didn’t KNOW Stalin was actually a superdeformed anime character.
marc page said,
August 17, 2007 at 5:35
It looks like Antsy Annie may have fallen off the wagon again. I’ll see if I can get in touch with her sponsor.
fluffy said,
August 17, 2007 at 5:39
urg. pls stop linking to that strange small island of morloks and cyclops.
on another point – am watching tom friedman on pbs-charlie rose — and all i can thing is “what a douche bag.”
“i checked my politics at the door on iraq” – vomit
“you can’t ‘tivo’ history … you can’t tivo history” – eyeroll
“dont throw good money after good money” – eat me.
Mo's Bike Shop said,
August 17, 2007 at 6:00
The Gary Rupperts of my youth have been lost to immigration policy. We had none of this addressing the topic, or providing follow-up, or furnishing links!
NO! The Garry Ruppert I knew never took a care to the post or the thread. He learned early that links were the devil-liberals’ workshop!
Bone-cringing logic. Syllogisms too appalling to sustain. Blind, self-confident pig-ignorance. These were the tools of the One True Gary.
These are sad times. The True Gary has been deported. His father killed by pirates. Although, his job has been kept in this country by a Heritage graduate, it will be a long, long time before this new knave hears the call, descends into the abyss, and takes up again the mantle of Gary Ruppert.
I wonder, will his supervisor, Sanjay, be able to help with his transformation?
jcricket said,
August 17, 2007 at 6:07
I dunno Mo…….mixing “the fact is” with an IF/THEN statement is kind of telling in itself. How can something hypothetical also be factual?
This lesser Gary Ruppert simply cannot reach the bar set by the masters that were before him. Sad. Sad.
Notorious P.A.T. said,
August 17, 2007 at 6:20
“The fact is, if there was another attack… it would be a positive.”
Spoken like a true patriot.
Nothing shuts a person up who accuses wingnuts of wanting another 9/11. . . like saying you want another 9/11. Well played, Gary, well played!
fluffy said,
August 17, 2007 at 7:16
pajamas media blog in this guy’s future?
WASHINGTON—A career U.S. diplomat indicted this week for sending threatening, obscene messages to an Arab political organization has retired from the foreign service, the State Department said Thursday.
Patrick Syring retired last month, about a year after he allegedly left racist and intimidating phone and e-mail messages with the Arab American Institute, but before his Wednesday indictment on federal charges of threatening and violating civil rights laws, spokesman Sean McCormack said
RandomObserver said,
August 17, 2007 at 7:18
The only thing that would be better than another terrorist attack would be an endless string of them.
Nullifidian said,
August 17, 2007 at 7:34
and therein lies the power of the model…
If it’s meaningless, then your model has no power to represent anything else except perhaps for the mushy, pale stew that represents the wingnut brain.
Typical Republican said,
August 17, 2007 at 7:35
The only thing that would be better than another terrorist attack would be an endless string of them.
That would show all the pacifists and layabouts and socialists in this country that George W. Bush was RIGHT!
And what would you liberals have to say then?
Liberals.
Hmf.
wordyeti said,
August 17, 2007 at 9:55
Gavin(IP) = 6y + (captcha/2?)
Gavin(3*bonghit) = 2y + (Ace/snark) + (Schilling-sock)
((( IF mikey – singlemalt THEN mikey + wingnut = waterboarding)))
ambi_girl said,
August 17, 2007 at 10:32
One of his accounts, supposedly demonstrating the dehumanizing effects of the Iraq war on him and fellow soldiers, occurred in Kuwait before Beauchamp even entered Iraq. Other parts of his writing are likely false, and if not, constitute military crimes on his part. In fact, his anonymous writing from a war zone is likely against military rules. This story is currently unfolding.
Amazing! An admission that the only thing demonstrably in error was just about a location, then a blanket claim that the rest of it is probably false (no evidence required). But if it isn’t false, then he’s guilty of military crimes!– btw anyway the REAL crime was that he wrote about it at all.
Gotta love the wingnut logic.
Bogdan Polcovnicu said,
August 17, 2007 at 10:35
about sex -something you didn’t know-
http://polcovnicu.blogspot.com
Pope Bandar bin Turtle said,
August 17, 2007 at 12:38
Malcovich!
Malcovich! Malcovich!
Malcovich! Malcovich! Malcovich!
Malcovich! Malcovich! Malcovich! Malcovich!
Malcovich! Malcovich! Malcovich! Malcovich! Malcovich!
over_educated said,
August 17, 2007 at 13:38
“The fact is, if there was another attack, it would likely be on a liberal place and it would cause the liberals to shut up, so I guess it would be a positive.”
I find your views intriguing and I would like to subscribe to your newsletter.
Pope Bandar bin Turtle said,
August 17, 2007 at 13:51
intriguing is the new black!
mdhatter said,
August 17, 2007 at 14:25
The Fact Is the new pink
Yankee Fan said,
August 17, 2007 at 15:18
“I dunno Mo…….mixing “the fact is” with an IF/THEN statement is kind of telling in itself. How can something hypothetical also be factual?”
For your own good – NEVER try to wrap your head around wingnut logik.
Righteous Bubba said,
August 17, 2007 at 15:50
I remember the glory days:
tasteless said,
August 10, 2007 at 18:38
Dude, I’m just kidding, although I do think you should have left the comment up. You have a great site here.
Of course that was before the Great Captcha Incident which proved that the site was Not So Great.
Dr. Squid said,
August 17, 2007 at 16:44
live action badger!
Dhalgren said,
August 17, 2007 at 17:06
That would show all the pacifists and layabouts and socialists in this country that George W. Bush was RIGHT!
Right about what? That if you choose the incorrect battleground and let al Qaeda regroup in Pakistan, you failed to take the fight to our enemies?
If anyone is being a pacifist when it comes to terror, it is George W. Bush. He is giving them another chance to attack us, even when they themselves considered 9/11 to be their great way to ‘go out’ and achieve something historic.
Vinnie "The Crusher" Spaghetti said,
August 17, 2007 at 17:09
Heh-heh, yeah. Shame if anyting wuz ta happen ta it.
Bogdan Polcovnicu said,
August 17, 2007 at 17:40
about sex -something you didn’t know-
http://polcovnicu.blogspot.com
1
bogdan said,
August 17, 2007 at 18:24
Hi! Im in yr thrd spmng mah blog
kthxbai
atheist said,
August 17, 2007 at 18:49
Actually, Bogdan, I didn’t want to know.
velvel in decatur said,
August 17, 2007 at 19:18
I remember going into a municipal courtroom years ago and seeing a sign crudely taped to the front of the judge’s bench that said “Always tell the truth so that you will never have to remember your story.” Beauchamp (or whateverthehell his name is) is going to have a fine time trying to remember this tale. It is reminds me of the tale of the woman trooper who lied about being raped.
The lies all undermine the truth that needs to be told. And it is sort of like the little boy crying wolf.
mikey said,
August 17, 2007 at 19:35
And it is sort of like the little [frat] boy crying
wolfWMD.Fixed!
It is reminds me of the tale of the woman trooper who lied about being raped.
Yeah, I remember that one too. The one that proved that women are never ever abused, harassed or raped in the US armed forces. Yeah, thank goodness for that, eh?
mikey
t4toby said,
August 17, 2007 at 19:39
How can you spam the comments by pointing to a site in another language?
Doesn’t that dude know that American is the only language spoken here (none of that Frenchy British, that’s for sure).
And as far as the trolls go, I agree.
They’re like school on Saturday- No Class
t4toby said,
August 17, 2007 at 19:40
What’s with the uptick in troll traffic, anyway? Which asshat wingnut Pointed them here?
So to the trolls, I say:
I like pie.
Duros62 said,
August 17, 2007 at 20:42
LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! etc.
You lolligag your way to first, you lolligag your way to second. You know what that makes you?
Lolligagers.
What’s with the uptick in troll traffic, anyway?
Okay, who left the screen door open?
Dain Brammaged said,
August 17, 2007 at 21:39
Badgers! We don’t need no dancing Badgers!
Doc Washboard said,
August 18, 2007 at 4:02
I understood “download.” And “browser.” Oh, and “apropos.” The rest is all buzzes and crackles–and I’m seen as one of the techie ones at my school.
a different brad said,
August 18, 2007 at 8:54
Man: Well, what’ve you got?
Waitress: Well, there’s egg and beauchamp; egg sausage and beauchamp; beauchamp and spam; egg beauchamp and spam; egg beauchamp sausage and spam; spam beacuhamp sausage and spam; spam beauchamp spam spam beauchamp and spam; spam beauchamp spam spam beauchamp spam tomato and spam;
Wingnuts (starting to chant): Beauchamp beauchamp beauchamp…..
Then vikings kick the crap out of em.
mdhatter said,
August 18, 2007 at 20:54
I can picture that diff brad.
thebestgolfdrivers said,
June 27, 2008 at 19:13
Lol i hate dancing badgers:)
BR,
Johan