Aug
10
10
LOLcons
Above: Charles Krauthammer
‘LOLcons’ concept created by Jon Swift and named by Marita. (Online LOLcat builder here.)
‘LOLcons’ concept created by Jon Swift and named by Marita. (Online LOLcat builder here.)
‘LOLcons’ concept created by Jon Swift and named by Marita. (Online LOLcat builder here.)
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Professor Booty said,
August 10, 2007 at 19:48
Um, wow. Not that the statement is incorrect, but…um.
atheist said,
August 10, 2007 at 19:50
Expains a lot
NobodySpecial said,
August 10, 2007 at 19:51
He’s got legs! He knows how to use them.
Judy Carne said,
August 10, 2007 at 19:53
That’s harsh, man, just plain harsh. And cold. Harsh and cold.
Lemmy Caution said,
August 10, 2007 at 19:54
“Mein Fuhrer! I can walk!”
a different brad said,
August 10, 2007 at 19:56
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh
I gots no legs no legs no legs
i gots no legs no legs no legs
neocons = panhandler on the subway from Kids.
billy pilgrim said,
August 10, 2007 at 20:04
Oh, I got two legs from my waist to the ground, and
When I move ‘em they walk around, and
When I lift ‘em they climb the stairs, and
When I shave ‘em they ain’t got hairs
ooops. sorry Kraphammer.
Je support les troops said,
August 10, 2007 at 20:05
¿Donde esta Pamela?
TRex said,
August 10, 2007 at 20:09
Ohhhhh, now you’ve done it.
MCH said,
August 10, 2007 at 20:12
Whoops. Might be duck-and-cover time.
mikey said,
August 10, 2007 at 20:15
My understanding is you can’t swing a dead cat in Diyala province without hitting a couple of severed legs. I mean, if you needed a couple, the place is LOUSY with ‘em.
Just sayin…
mikey
Wally Whateley said,
August 10, 2007 at 20:16
Oooooh, they’re gonna give you such a pinch!
Kraphammer will be on Bill O’Reilly tonight, telling about how you lied us into an unwinnable war…
Kathleen said,
August 10, 2007 at 20:37
giant sammich plz. kthxbye
Marie Jon' said,
August 10, 2007 at 20:51
Tune in Tonight
Tune in tonight at 8pm CT/9pm ET when The New Media Journal presents NMJ One-on-One featuring interviews with Dr. Paul L. Williams on terrorist training camps on American soil and Dr. Rachel Ehrenfeld, on censorship in the War on Terror.
And don’t miss our featured editorial of the week.
Click here or on the banner below to listen to the live show and to access archives of all past show.
Marie Jon' said,
August 10, 2007 at 20:52
Go to http://www.DrawingClose.org/ and click on The New Media Journal blog
pablo said,
August 10, 2007 at 20:56
When do the trading cards come out? I want to collect the whole set!
Drew Johnston said,
August 10, 2007 at 20:58
I guess we can look forward to a visit by piny and Zuzu’s PC brigade now.
Way to go, Gav – it’s been civil around here for way too fucking long.
Kathleen said,
August 10, 2007 at 21:00
is it me or have Marie Jon’ and Josh Trevino between them started over 55 different websites?
ironicname said,
August 10, 2007 at 21:10
This is an insult to all people who have undergone therapeutic or traumatic amputations.
2 million people in the US live with limb loss. 100K per year undergo amputations in the US. It takes a lot of courage and determination to continue living a relatively normal life after amputation. I work with them and I have to tell you that they are mostly NOT disingenuous assholes.
Gavin, you should be ashamed. This is over the top.
Educate yourself about their stories – these are some brave people.
NobodySpecial said,
August 10, 2007 at 21:31
Yes, you should be ashamed.
Perhaps if you tried walking through a mall like Charles Krauthammer.
Well, not walk, exactly.
The Disgruntled Chemist said,
August 10, 2007 at 21:44
It’s also an insult to these fine people.
Wait, is “insult” the right word?
No. No, I think I meant “turn-on”.
Carry on, then.
pine nut said,
August 10, 2007 at 21:54
It’s also an insult to these fine people.
Wait, is “insult” the right word?
No. No, I think I meant “turn-on”.
. . .
The next sexual deviance to bring down a Republican official.
Gavin M. said,
August 10, 2007 at 21:58
Of course not, but Krauthammer is a malevolent and dangerous person. We’re talking about Krauthammer, not others who share physical characteristics with him.
Righteous Bubba said,
August 10, 2007 at 22:03
Maybe he hates humanity because he’s an asshole.
Gavin M. said,
August 10, 2007 at 22:07
Well, yeah. Still, nobody said anything when I photoshopped him as Dr. Strangelove.
mapaghimagsik said,
August 10, 2007 at 22:13
Hey, I was doing LOLcons way back in “the day”
http://www.drunkduck.com/Taking_Stock/?p=231174
Kathleen said,
August 10, 2007 at 22:16
I work with them and I have to tell you that they are mostly NOT disingenuous assholes.
I think this is the tip that it’s a sarcastic comment.
Righteous Bubba said,
August 10, 2007 at 22:18
Still, nobody said anything when I photoshopped him as Dr. Strangelove.
No complaints there: Strangelove was creepy Nazi first, and the physical similarity is simply, uh, wonderful.
Irion said,
August 10, 2007 at 22:22
“I can has prastetick legs”?
I
Gavin M. said,
August 10, 2007 at 22:27
…Or when I photoshopped Richard Widmark pushing him down the stairs in a screenshot from ‘Kiss of Death.’
I should just keep my mouth shut now, I know.
mikey said,
August 10, 2007 at 22:42
As someone who has actively participated in the destruction and traumatic removal of limbs, not to mention the tying off of the tourniquet and trying to prevent the guy from looking at the ragged stump AND having to police up the chunks of people after the shooting stopped, I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say that making a comment about the physdis of a warmongering pro death monster like krapmallet is not only totally within the bounds, but is indeed an honorable action.
People who espouse the kind of madness and suspension of civilized behaviors that he does are not in a position to get hurt when somebody throws one at their earhole.
mikey
ironicname said,
August 10, 2007 at 22:54
Indeed Bubba.
Gavin, what would you think of a LOL caption about Alan Keyes that read “I hate whitey fagboyz cause I is a black’?
Same category of insult.
You hit my big red button.
Legalize said,
August 10, 2007 at 22:57
“I can walk!”
yada yada yada yada, dropped brief case, hilarity, teh funny, running around, guns.
“Is there a problem officers?”
Gavin M. said,
August 10, 2007 at 23:03
Gavin, what would you think of a LOL caption about Alan Keyes that read “I hate whitey fagboyz cause I is a black’?
See, this is weird. In one thread I’m being attacked for being a puritanical liberal speech-censor with no sense of humor, and in the other I’m trying to figure out how to explain the Krauthammer caption so it doesn’t seem like I’m callously making fun of handicapped people.
What would I think of a Keyes caption like that? It wouldn’t be funny, because it doesn’t try to get at the essence of Keyes. It renders him as ‘that black guy.’ Offensive, unfunny.
You’re going to ask how the Krauthammer is different, and I’ll have to try to express that it’s probably true that Krauthammer is embittered because of his accident, and is very dangerous because of what he’s become.
scoutt said,
August 10, 2007 at 23:17
I’m ashamed to read this on a liberal blog. Just as bad if not worse than rethuglican behavior. wow. take it down. making fun of a quadrapalegic is dispicable.
mikey said,
August 10, 2007 at 23:20
Gavin, a crazy guy spewing spittle – flecked nonsense while trying to make a point he never quite understood himself hardly qualifies as an attack.
On the other hand, you’re gonna catch some flak for this one ’cause there always seems to be people who want to internalize that kind of thing.
Didn’t we just get a lesson a dozen threads back or so about the concept of mens rea? It’s perfectly clear what your intent was, and for that matter, what it was not. If people want to come here and police your humor, there’s not a great deal you can do about it, but as far as I’m concerned you don’t have to defend yourself or your humanity…
mikey
Righteous Bubba said,
August 10, 2007 at 23:29
You’re going to ask how the Krauthammer is different, and I’ll have to try to express that it’s probably true that Krauthammer is embittered because of his accident, and is very dangerous because of what he’s become.
I think that kind of reasoning demands a god-like surety on the part of the joker and his audience that each will take each other correctly, and in Krauthammer’s case enough people think like him that his shitty thoughts aren’t obviously the result of a crippling injury, so even in joke form the equation demands some thought that I think is not up to par.
It’s a cliché that a flawed body equals a flawed morality, and it’s one I’m not opposed to for the making of myths – any number of movies have some obese or scarred villain and those faults really work in some cases – but I don’t think it worked out this time.
I confess I would probably find it funny if I saw a sketch about, say, Krauthammer having a grasping tool for unreachably high items made from the bones of Iraqi children, so obviously I’m not quite sure where my line lies. Greasing his wheels with the fat of muslim women? A ramp up to his doorstep on a foundation of skulls?
Gavin M. said,
August 10, 2007 at 23:32
Well, Mikey, it’s one thing when people you don’t know come flying through and say they’re offended by something, but it’s another when it’s people whose opinions you value.
I guess I ought to take the flak. Actually, perversely, every caption I can think of to tone it down ends up being even worse.
“O Ya? How duz UR mother dance?”
Because there’s something about Krauthammer and the wheelchair that’s essential to his presence. It’s not that he’s handicapped; it’s something about the way he wears it, his personal mannerisms.
Righteous Bubba said,
August 10, 2007 at 23:35
Because there’s something about Krauthammer and the wheelchair that’s essential to his presence. It’s not that he’s handicapped; it’s something about the way he wears it, his personal mannerisms.
I agree, although AVENGIN UR KLINGHOFFER would also be in exceptionally poor taste.
Gavin M. said,
August 10, 2007 at 23:44
“IM ON UR FLOORZ LEAVIN BLACK MARKS”…
Nah, that’s not it either.
I’ll pop it into photoshop and find something…
Gavin M. said,
August 10, 2007 at 23:47
There, how’s that?
mapaghimagsik said,
August 10, 2007 at 23:54
I have to admit, I’m amused by the new caption. I wasn’t particularly offended by the old — perhaps I’ve become that angry at a warmongering freak whose sense of empathy had was long burned out on — I don’t know. There’s something cold and freakish about his assessments that mass death of brown people doesn’t count.
Or something.
Kathleen said,
August 10, 2007 at 23:57
so, not sarcastic then. new one is funny too.
pablo said,
August 11, 2007 at 0:05
Did anyone complain when you photoshopped in with Bette Davis in “Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?”?
I thought we’d been over this Gavin. Don’t engage the sensitivity cops. Just let them “tsk, tsk” and bathe in their moral superiority until they get their nut.
Righteous Bubba said,
August 11, 2007 at 0:10
Don’t engage the sensitivity cops.
Gawd I hope I’m not them and Gavin can do exactly what he likes at all times, providing he abides by the Uniform Code Of Hitlery Justice or whatever I’m told it is over in that other thread.
I did think of one that confuses me:
LETS
ROOLROLLClem said,
August 11, 2007 at 0:18
I has invisible parrot on mai shoulder
Is heavy
Gavin M. said,
August 11, 2007 at 0:34
Krauthammer: “LET’S ROLL!”
That’s more evil than mine, dude. You’re so complicit now.
Kathleen said,
August 11, 2007 at 0:36
sweet jesus ‘let’s roll’ is funny.
atheist said,
August 11, 2007 at 0:49
I’m going to go out on a limb (ha, ha) and admit that I liked the other one better.
Gavin M. said,
August 11, 2007 at 0:55
Well, some were like, ‘funny as a crutch, dude.’
If only Krauthammer would pose with some grinning people, like at some foundation event or something, my Wheelie and the Chopper Bunch dreams would come true.
Righteous Bubba said,
August 11, 2007 at 1:26
That’s more evil than mine, dude.
What? I meant like, uh, photoshop a Tootsie Roll in there and uh, well…
billy pilgrim said,
August 11, 2007 at 1:38
See, When I see people like Kraphammer, I think of John Callahan.
John Callahan became a quadraplegic as a result of a drunken driving accident, with himself as the drunk. He eventually became a biting cartoonist, and people with disabilities are often the target of his cartoon (two cowboys in wheelchairs. One says “this town ain’t accessible enough for the both of us!”)
Berke Breathed did wonderful work making jokes about Cutter John’s disabilities. “I ran over his toes. Twice” gets me rolling (heh) every time.
See, it’s not ridiculing the PEOPLE with disabilities, it’s ridiculing the human response to the disability. And yes, making a joke about the disability, like you might make a joke about someone’s large feet (see Dysfyunctional Family Circus, Marfan Syndrome).
All we’re saying, is Kraphammer is an malignant asshole with large feet.
(sigh) I guess sometimes, some folks can’t see anything but some hypothetical insult to some imaginary granfalloon.
As George Carlin says, “Rape isn’t funny. But you can make a joke about it.”
Inigo Montoya said,
August 11, 2007 at 2:14
My name is Inigo Montoya. You insulted my granfalloon. Prepare to die.
atheist said,
August 11, 2007 at 2:30
Lollerz
Righteous Bubba said,
August 11, 2007 at 3:31
I was at some film-festival premiere for Jesus is Magic and Sarah Silverman was there to take questions. Some fat person asked why there weren’t any jokes about fat people when she’d offended everyone else. She said “Because they’re sensitive.”
Anne Laurie said,
August 11, 2007 at 4:19
See, I always that Krauthammer’s problem was Parkinsons, so given all the “jokes” made by Con favorites at the expense of Michael J. Fox — not to mention Janet Reno — his own disability was fair game.
Or maybe I’m just evil. Because Gavin’s new caption is pretty good but my first thought was
CANNOT KICK PUPPIES NOW
MUST ABUSE HUMANS INSTEAD
Jrod said,
August 11, 2007 at 5:22
The original was funnier. Now if you’ll excuse me I have a strange craving for the dollar menu that must be sated.
mat said,
August 11, 2007 at 18:50
Krauthammer gives me the effing willies. TEH CREEEEEEEPY!
Hysterical Woman said,
August 11, 2007 at 19:27
What was the original caption again?
solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short said,
August 11, 2007 at 22:22
I’m wondering that m’self. Stupid forbidden fruit and the perceived sweetness of its juices.
I got one, though:
ROTFLMAO
Except the L is for lying.
Duros62 said,
August 15, 2007 at 21:49
I great gazoogled this, but couldn’t find it, so I took it upon myself to fill the void.
Don’t know if anyone will look at this thread anymore, but….
Righteous Bubba said,
August 15, 2007 at 21:52
That’s awesome.