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Shorter Powerline

Above: Powerline’s Scott Johnson, Esq.
- Candid and revealing is the official biography of 9/11 hero Dick Cheney, as penned by Weekly Standard scribe Stephen Hayes.
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard.






NobodySpecial said,
July 16, 2007 at 19:44
“His importance lies in the office he holds.”
The truest thing in that post. After all, Cheney doesn’t get his Unitary Executive if he (or someone with a brain) holds down the Presidency. Cheney needs Bush to be the ‘guyyouwanttohaveabeerwith’ so they can get their agenda passed.
The Sammich said,
July 16, 2007 at 21:32
Dammit! My job has been outsourced … to a CORN DOG? WTF?
I call on all right-thinking body size & shapeists to boycott all non-Sammich crudely Photoslopped artwork.
I do, however, appreciate the phallic overtones and clever placement of the Corn Dog.
Duros62 said,
July 16, 2007 at 21:51
Shorter shorter: His importance lies.
Ted said,
July 16, 2007 at 22:24
Shorter shorter shorter: lies.
"Oh Stewardess, I Speak 'Nut" said,
July 16, 2007 at 22:38
Hmm. Junior (supposedly) wanted to return to D.C. Old Cakewalk, however, didn’t want Junior in D.C.; and Junior did not return to D.C.
Guess we know who wears the pants in that relationship. Not that there was ever any doubt.
Pinko Punko said,
July 16, 2007 at 22:39
Shorter shorter shorter shorter: lie
Smiling Mortician said,
July 16, 2007 at 23:04
Cheney stopped briefly. He was obviously moved.
I call bullshit.
D. Aristophanes said,
July 16, 2007 at 23:11
“Over the past three years Steve interviewed Cheney for nearly thirty hours …”
Hour 1: Two dozen successive staring contests (all lost by Stephen Hayes)
Hour 2-24: Hayes shot in face by Cheney; recovering in area hospital
Hour 25: Revealing side-mouthed snicker by Cheney; dutifully recorded by Hayes
Hour 26: Attempts by Hayes to follow up on side-mouthed snicker revelation met with stonewalling side-mouthed “Pffts”, culminating in angry side-mouthed “Go fuck yourself.”
Hours 27-30: Hayes conducts rest of interview in isolation cell, bound in stress position with heavy metal blaring; gets “scoop” on fact that “There’ll be lots more of that if you fuck with me in any way, shape or form on your fucking book, cocksucker.”
Simba B. said,
July 16, 2007 at 23:18
Does “esquire” even mean anything anymore?
…well, other than “pompous asshole”.