This is the primary reason I want universal health care tomorrow.

And then, one cold morning as the now-homeless insurance functionary squats behind a fallen tree, defecating desperately, he looks down to see his stool is ridden with maggots. Furthermore, it’s cold. He thinks to himself, Why is my poo cold? It just came out of my body — WAIT, what am I thinking? Who cares if it’s cold? I JUST SHIT A BUNCH OF MAGGOTS! My GOD, there are hundreds of MAGGOTS up inside me, and all over my bum-hole!

Then, he hears the bear. Growling and slashing at trees, one angry, hungry bear is coming for him — no doubt attracted by the scent of his waste. Desperately, he paws at the leaves in a pathetic attempt to bury his spoor — but it’s no good; he’s not a kitty. I can do better than this, he thinks, I’ll use my specialized MBA high-level mental-brain training!

Several seconds pass. No ideas materialize. The bear is getting closer. It feels like the flesh on his head is tightening around his skull, but that’s just a panic attack. He has to run. But he hasn’t even pulled up his pants. What to do? Pull up your pants. No, he hasn’t even wiped yet. The bear is closer. His left arm is numb — the panic attack, again, but he thinks it’s a heart attack. I need a baby aspirin, he thinks wildly, scooping up his poop and frantically pushing it into his mouth, chewing in grim determination to stop the bear attack, the heart attack, the death attack, the world attack, it’s fucking hopeless, he’s done for.

Yeah, that’s what should happen.

The fact is that reliance on ERs because no other treatment is available to tens of millions of people has crippled the system, particularly in low-income areas (see King-Harbor Medical Center, lady dying on the floor while orderlies mopped up the blood around her edition) and has sent costs soaring that are absorbed by everyone who pays taxes and for health insurance. It’s a universal system, just the worst one you could possibly devise.

That argument is also only true so far as it goes — it works okay if you need emergency care (say, you were in a car wreck or broke your leg or got shot), but if the reason you need medical care is for long-term treatment or preventive care or chronic conditions — you know, like 90% of all medical treatment consists of — you’re shit out of luck. You can’t take advantage of the no-one-will-be-turned-away deal if you’ve got diabetes or high blood pressure.

Oh, Mister Pierce, you are such a Defeatocrat. Of course you can use the emergency room for those things!

You just don’t take your insulin because you can’t afford to buy it, or your power’s been turned off and so the insulin you had in your refrigerator turned bad on you, wait to go into diabetic shock, and voila! – emergency room treats you.

With the high blood pressure, you’ll still get care….just wait until the pressure makes you blow a vessel in your brain. Then, all the treatment you can stand is yours.

Why do y’all hate America, home of the best health care in the world?

Excuse me, ma’am. Uh, Candy?

Popskull??

That’s COOL!!

mikey

You know, I wish those MBAs would have to go dig ditches. I don’t consider myself a hateful person, but all the insurance company pricks in this town (and there are a lot of them, we’re an insurance company town) should all be living in refrigerator boxes down in the woods by Gray’s Lake, eating out of dumpsters, and hoping they can find a shelter that will take them in when they’re drunk on cheap popskull. And then when their livers wear out, they can just try to go get help at Iowa Methodist or Mercy….

I’m sorry. I tend to get a little excited about all that.

If America reforms its health care system it will put tens of thousands of MBAs out of work! They’ll have to go back to digging ditches!

You have to stop subjecting yourself to this crap. It can’t be healthy.

He used that line in Cleveland recently:

“The immediate goal is to make sure there are more people on private insurance plans. I mean, people have access to health care in America. After all, you just go to an emergency room. The question is, will we be wise about how we pay for health care.”

Well, if a sign says it – problem solved.

It sure kept those long-haired freaky people from applying.

The funny thing is that even if you get treated, they will also try to bill you for as much as possible after the fact. At higher than insured rates, of course.

The “Fake Name Free ER Care” thing just smacks of that “Gun shows have the same requirements as a gun store” loophole.

Based on the last six years, I have to answer Sadly, No!

…it just happens to be the worst universal healthcare system ever devised. Aren’t conservatives supposed to be in favor of efficiency and measurable results?