Feb
3

New Innovations In WTF?ery




Posted at 1:40 by Gavin M.

You know how sometimes you run across something and you’re like, Damn, that’s a whole new flavor of stupid…?

Here’s Patterico, once half-sane, but now deeply obsessed with the Communist plot to fluoridate our nation’s drinking water the ‘Jamilgate’ escapade, who thinks we totally won’t notice if he posts something like this:

2/1/2007
AP Owes, But Does Not Give, Correction

Filed under: General, Media Bias, Morons — Patterico @ 12:00 am

[...]

Uh, AP? You also reported that Sunnis had claimed the mosques were destroyed:

Sunni residents in a volatile northwest Baghdad neighborhood claimed Friday that revenge-seeking Shiite militiamen had destroyed four Sunni mosques, burned homes and killed many people, while the Shiite-dominated police force stood by and did nothing.

(I understand that some ill-informed leftist bloggers have claimed, without proof, that this language was out there for 20 minutes and never made it into an actual story. I’m not linking these morons out of principle. You can easily find their stupid posts yourself. The name of their moronblog rhymes with the phrase “Madly Ho.� My response to these dunderheads is simple. Uh, ill-informed leftist bloggers? Meet Lexis/Nexis.)

Honestly, if I were writing this narrative, the link text would be, ‘BWAHA! U SADLY SUxXxORZ R PWNED 4 EVAR!11′ and clicking would lead to a picture of Patterico at the top of a staircase with an armload of birthday cakes, slipping on a diaper. But that’s me with the broad humor. Patterico is, like, much more literal.

If you’ve used Lexis-Nexis much, you’re already laughing like a fat chief. It’s a commercial database that archives everything that’s emitted from mainstream news sources — such as, for instance, raw AP feeds, which commonly go through several successive versions as a story develops. That ‘without proof’ charge hurt our feelings a bit, because of course we never look anything up around here, being dunderheads. But once again, our hours of shiftless pot smoking seem to have paid off: Patterico’s gotcha! screen shot shows a raw AP feed in triplicate, and no news stories. How long can this blind luck hold out? It’s almost as though we’re cheating somehow…

destroyedmosques.jpg
Above: This AP feed with the imprecise word, ‘destroyed,’ was up for roughly 20 minutes before being supplanted.

Bradrocket adds: Nyah, nyah, nyah, Patterico! I redacted it! Ha, ha, ha! Hope you saved your screenshot!!!

In case you’re not following the narrative, it’s like the right-bloggers are all running around trying to prove that Charlie Chaplin is stealing their precious bodily fluids, and we said, “Look dudes, say what you want, but Charlie Chaplin died in 1977.” And then there was a lull, until Patterico stood up and was like, “Hah! These ignorant liberal dirtbags are such a bunch of ill-informed moron-dirtbags! How do they explain THIS?”

Since he won’t link to us out of principle, we’ll just link to this post ourselves. There. Teh circle is complete. Rack up the next blazing ‘Jamilgate’ issue, please.

Next: Ace of Spades, economist, cocks his green eyeshade and sticks his index finger in the pencil sharpener:


January 31, 2007
Cowbell: Economy Grows 3.5% In 3rd Q, Easily Besting Expectations

[...]

With the Fed facing a strongly rebounding economy but leaving interest rates alone, the Dow looks on its way to setting a new record:

b.png

Never mind the brazen hoopty about ‘leaving interest rates alone,’ or the fact that a one-day graph(!) is like peering through a soda straw. Follow me through this for a moment here:

The graph shows trading on February 1st, when there was an intra-day record (of 12,667.03) at like 3:25 PM or so. It’s posted in an entry from 4:36 PM January 31st — six minutes after trading closed on the previous day. Ace (as I recall) is somewhere around the New York area, where the Stock Exchange is located, so all times should be EST. I see two possibilities here:

1) Ace zips around in a time machine, which does in fact give you a lot to keep track of, chronologically. This seems unlikely considering the boner-inducing prospect of living his life in an eternal Groundhog Day loop of infinite September-the-11ths, 2001. Counterpoint: frequency of posting suggests several Aces converging in the same temporal phase. There might be three or four years’ worth of them over there, sleeping and posting in shifts. When the time comes to do a TV appearance, they choose the one with the cleanest shirt.

2) Ace heard about the record and was trying to be all like, “Woo, check me out: The Dow looks on its way to setting a new record,” but was so hapless about it that he posted a graph from the end of the trading day — i.e., after the record had already taken place, as is clearly seen in the graph. Through a chain of unknown mishaps, this was back-posted to the previous day, when he… Because if… And then the…

See? You’ve never seen one quite like that before, have you?

I’m trying to be mindful of the possibility that Ace is actually making some kind of normal, rational statement that I’m somehow failing to see, and not just running around going “Blardy-har-har!1″ like usual. I don’t understand this, so frankly I fear it.

Here’s a palate cleanser of ordinary-stupid, so you don’t go away feeling all weird like I do. Ace continues:

Has anyone kind of noticed the economy’s been growing steadily and nicely since the Clinton-Gore recession of late 2000?

Maybe an easy-to-read picture will help our subretarded media understand:

gdpchart-1.jpg

See, the thing with charts is how you set them up. That looks really dire, that 2001 column over on the left. I wonder what the ‘Clinton-Gore recession’ looked like, if you were to sort of extend the left edge of the data.

tehsamechart.jpg

Of course, we could go by quarter instead. But then you see a little dip in the third quarter of 2000, then an upspike, and then things go all woobly-woobly up and down for most of Bush’s first term — i.e., not what you’d call ‘steadily and nicely.’ And then if we were to superimpose deficit spending, or the per capita savings rate, or median income growth, or the trade deficit…

Stats being what they are, there’s always some way to crunch the numbers to make Bush look like President Diamond-Encrusted God-King. Most of them are better than this one.

111 Comments »

  1. Ohio Voter said,

    February 3, 2007 at 2:03

    The economy is farkin’ rosy, stupid. I know that ’cause the Iron Worker who was proudly picking up cigarette butts in the Wal*Mart parking lot told me that my Ted Strickland for Governor sticker belonged in the trash, too.

    He voted to lose his job at the mill, he voted for higher taxes, and he voted for lower standards of health care. I didn’t tell him that, though, as I was concerned for my safety.

  2. a different brad said,

    February 3, 2007 at 2:22

    Hi Mario! How goes it? (He’ll be here soon, we all know it.)
    As for Patterico, for the umpteenth time a wingnut blogger has shown that 9/11 didn’t kill irony, it killed shame, at least in the hearts and minds of Bush supporters.

  3. Nim, ham hock of liberty said,

    February 3, 2007 at 2:25

    Maybe I’m missing something here, but…that 20 minute AP feed says that some Sunnis in a volatile neighborhood claimed their mosques were destroyed.

    So…the part about Sunnis saying it is kind of a disclaimer, right? Right??
    I mean….the AP reports bullshit from the WH all the time, but it says, “Tony Snow claimed…” first.

    What am I not getting here?

  4. Thom said,

    February 3, 2007 at 2:27

    Another right wing craptasticator – another blog I’m banned from commenting on (either that or he just turned comments off). Sigh.

    Hey this guy told me that the Buffalo Sabres won the Stanley Cup last year. That makes it a fact that I reported here, and I will one day in the future owe you an apology.

  5. Moronblogger said,

    February 3, 2007 at 2:27

    I’M IN UR AP DESTROYIN’ UR MOSKS!!1!

  6. Thom said,

    February 3, 2007 at 2:29

    Ham of Hock Liberty

    You are missing nothing. It’s a head-scratcher, I know, but those loons don’t understand reporting any more than they understand humor.

  7. Max Power said,

    February 3, 2007 at 2:41

    Patterico was once half sane? I’m afraid that wanton and unjustified assertion casts doubt on the rest of this post…

  8. ifthethunderdontgetya said,

    February 3, 2007 at 2:43

    Jamil-Gate, the best scandal evuh!11!

    Not only are the MalkinTentsâ„¢ as funny as hell as they get to the bottom of the story, but their entire premise (teh Liberul Media is ignoring the Good News in Iraq) is falling apart at the seams.

    While we still have no proof that Iran is behind the deteriorating mess increasingly successful adventure in Irackeystan, CheneyCo’s boss, the Saudis, might be involved.

    No way we’re doing anything to the Saudis.

  9. Gavin M. said,

    February 3, 2007 at 2:46

    Maybe I’m missing something here, but…that 20 minute AP feed says that some Sunnis in a volatile neighborhood claimed their mosques were destroyed.

    Yeah, that’s exactly it.

    They’re basing a whole giant edifice of insinuation and rage on the word ‘destroyed’ in that one early AP feed, which was never published in that form.

  10. mikey said,

    February 3, 2007 at 2:46

    Goddam it, that’s just about enough. If we rename Groundhog day Jamil Hussein Wingnut Appreciation Day, can we put this fucking stupid to sleep forever?

    Please?

    mikey

  11. Kathleen said,

    February 3, 2007 at 2:47

    “Madly Ho”? now that is some first-rate funny right there. Good job Patty. /golfclap

    what I have taken away from this is that Patterico doesn’t actually understand what a “raw AP feed” is. No surprise.

  12. ifthethunderdontgetya said,

    February 3, 2007 at 2:47

    Way better link to describe Jamilgate!one1!!

  13. Thom said,

    February 3, 2007 at 2:53

    Hey, did you notice that size 7.62mm proudly describes himself as a “military contractor”?

    Don’t the troops hate those guys?

  14. Lesley said,

    February 3, 2007 at 2:57

    Funny comment on Patterico’s blob:

    My own view is that if the AP (or any media source) presents something as a fact, even if it is attributed to someone else, it should correct that fact if it turns out to be wrong.

    What if the President reports something as a fact, and it is attributed to, I don’t know, British intelligence? Should he correct that fact?

    Bwahahaha. Should he? The wingnut can’t make up his own mind on this.

    Forget facts, the President has told so many lies he’s lost track. Oh well, it’s a half glass full world for the wingnuts.

  15. Splatterico said,

    February 3, 2007 at 3:03

    Filed under: General, Media Bias, Morons — Patterico @ 12:00 am

    Unusual self-awareness here.

  16. J— said,

    February 3, 2007 at 3:03

    The name of their moronblog rhymes with the phrase “Madly Ho.�

    Madly Ho? That’s the best he can do? Here’s one for free: Gladly Blow.

  17. a different brad said,

    February 3, 2007 at 3:04

    After reading Patterico’s comments I realize I was wrong. He’s not shameless, he’s borderline illiterate. Nim, Ham Hock of Liberty has it perfectly. The essential premise of this whole fucking mess is WRONG. The AP never reported the 4 mosques were destroyed, they reported that “Sunni residents … claimed” the mosques were destroyed. It’s so stupid I think we’ve all been missing it. Nevermind the one mention in a raw feed that was changed before any outlets picked it up, the fucking AP never claimed the mosques were destroyed. They reported claims of destruction, not actual destruction. It’s pure bullshit.
    To use an extreme, and therefore obvious, example, if the Anti-Jewish Defamation League issues a report on neo-nazi activities that records anti-semitic claims, is the League now anti-semitic?
    Jebus, fuck, patterico is stupid.

  18. D. Sidhe said,

    February 3, 2007 at 3:14

    I insist you guys put up an April 1 banner that says “Madly, Ho!”. The rest of the entries could be you guys tilting at various right wing windmills. You know, like, um, you… always… do….

    Never mind.

  19. Lesley said,

    February 3, 2007 at 3:23

    This nut tops the corn flakes.

  20. kingubu said,

    February 3, 2007 at 3:26

    I’m a-feared that Gavin’s been sucked into a Vortex of St00pid. Here’s how it works:

    1) Make the stupidest argument imaginable, ignoring everything that contradicts it.

    2) When presented with documentary evidence that disproves your bullshit, reduce the context upon which you base your arguments while making the same sweeping st00pid assertion.

    3) Rinse and repeat 1 and 2, recursively, until everyone with slightest sense of sanity or logical consistency hangs themselves in despair.

    This is how kerning on a re-typed memo “proved” that a coke-hoovering dimwit who barely bothered to show up to the stateside champagne unit his Congressman daddy landed for him was “more heroic” than a guy who actually served in combat, and how the use of one fucking word in an initial wire report (and changed in all subsequent versions) “proves” that Iraq is really going great.

    Step back, Gavin. You’re inching closer to Teh Stoopid’s event horizion and frankly we need you on this side making with the poop jokes.

  21. g said,

    February 3, 2007 at 3:27

    Madly Ho!!

  22. Jillian said,

    February 3, 2007 at 3:27

    So, if I were a screenwriter, and the first script of my movie had a line in it with, say, a derogatory term for women in it, but by the time the movie was being shot the line had been rewritten, but someone found a copy of the first draft of my script online – this would then count as evidence that I am a misogynist?

    Ok, then…..

    Gavin, I think you nailed it: Patterico just doesn’t know what Lexis-Nexis is or what it’s used for. He also doesn’t understand what a “news feed” is and how it works.

    But it’s cute that he’s trying. In my classroom, I’d hand back his post with a strawberry scented scratch-and-sniff sticker for encouragement.

  23. Hadley Moe said,

    February 3, 2007 at 3:30

    Patter Reek Ho bettah have mah money!!!

  24. ifthethunderdontgetya said,

    February 3, 2007 at 3:34

    One of the best poop jokes of all time.

    P.S. Jillian is objectively pro woman hating.

    It saddens me to have to say it.

  25. Jillian said,

    February 3, 2007 at 3:49

    You have no idea just how much I love women…..

  26. His Grace said,

    February 3, 2007 at 3:59

    OK, I’ve been trying to figure out WHAT exactly the wingnuts have been screeching about this whole Jamilapoluza escapade. To this day, I still don’t understand what point, if any they have, other than we have to trust Bush blindly (because that’s worked out oh so well). Even if AP had a story that turned out to be false, rather than a feed that relied on hearsay (in which we found out that there WERE mosques attacked) and a guy who does exist really didn’t, in the large scheme of things would it matter? I can’t possibly see how writing post after post on Jamil Hussein has accomplished any damn thing for their cause. It won’t make the American people go, “Hey, that Jamil Hussein guy was a fake… I guess the AP just doesn’t want to show us the painted school house of victory.”

    All I can see is a bunch of deluded nitwits prancing around like they are the Sherlock Holmes of the 22nd century.

  27. mikey said,

    February 3, 2007 at 4:05

    Ahhh, jeez, you guys, are you distracted by the shiny football game or something?

    It CLEARLY would be “Badly, Know!”

    None of you qualify for your wingnut merit badge….

    mikey

  28. Smiling Mortician said,

    February 3, 2007 at 4:07

    It’s just more soma, your grace. It doesn’t have to have logic. It doesn’t have to be compelling. It doesn’t have to mean anything. All it has to do is give the less-than-30-percent crowd something to groan and mutter inarticulately about as they shuffle through the ghost-town shopping mall on the way to the drive-thru window for their Friday-nite-with-the-fambly, pray-to-baby-jeebus-before-swallowing-the-processed-food-chunks dinner. Because seriously, without wingnut conspiracy theories, what else do they have?

  29. Jay B. said,

    February 3, 2007 at 4:08

    I’m with His Grace. I’ve never understood the attraction to this story. Especially after the Malkin took a photo of the mosque with a giant hole in the top of it as “proof” of the AP’s lies about it being destroyed.

    Also, the blogger that rhymes with “Fatgreasyo” points out in a Boo-yah! way that one of the mosques in question only has a broken window. Of course, the Shiites have closed it and won’t let people in (so all anyone can see is the outside), but this observation (made by the AP, no less) is proof that Jamail Hussein didn’t exist? It’s something like that.

    Meanwhile, Iraq burns in large, stark terms.

  30. Righteous Bubba said,

    February 3, 2007 at 4:15

    Radly, Faux!

  31. J— said,

    February 3, 2007 at 4:16

    Plaid leno?

  32. Righteous Bubba said,

    February 3, 2007 at 4:17

    Bradley, Doh!

  33. J— said,

    February 3, 2007 at 4:21

    Rad lee, no?

  34. a different brad said,

    February 3, 2007 at 4:22

    I like the last one, bubba.
    Patterico is holding court in the comments to the post in question right now. Come join me in smacking him around.

  35. His Grace said,

    February 3, 2007 at 4:32

    I know it is on some level soma, but sweet Jesus, is it just me or are wingnut conspiracy theories just going downhill these days? I remember just after the cold war ended, some crazy wingnut explaining to me that he thought that the Reds were shamming, because “they’re to damn sneaky to just give up.” It was, on one level, bat shit insane, but considering this guy believed the rhetoric of “the evil empire” to the nth degree rational in a “well, if we accept the premise that Red Dawn is an accurate portrayal of Soviet capabilities and intentions, then, yes I suppose it all could be a giant hoax to trick America into surrendering.”

    Even some of the arguments for removing Saddam were rational if you sincerely believed he a) caused 9/11 and b) was 45 minutes away from nuking the Dukes of Hazzard Nascar tribute show. Idiotic premises like that should garner a real Nobel Prize nomination when compared to Jamilgate.

  36. Lawnguylander said,

    February 3, 2007 at 4:45

    Holy shit. What a coincidence. Idle hydro blazing and some Charlie Chaplin DVDs figure prominently in my evening. But now I have to find out that not just ace but an army of Aces lives somewhere in the NY area? My buzz is harshed before it even starts. Thanks a lot Gavin.

    The Patterico commenters aren’t nearly as entertainingly batshit crazy as the LGFers but they are heavily invested in devoting their energies to a distraction from the horror in Iraq. Kind of like when I’ve got a lot on my mind that I should be giving some thought to but don’t want to deal with I go and organize my CDs obsessively instead.

  37. ifthethunderdontgetya said,

    February 3, 2007 at 4:52

    Mikey, I am proud to say I have a the following merit badges:

    Reptile Study, Canoeing, and Fishing.

    That’s about it. Of course, it was the early 70′s…and the Boy Scouts didn’t have a Candlemaking merit badge.

    P.S. I have a “Mile Swim” badge, as well.

    P.P.S. Pre-emptive We don’t need no steeenking badgers strike.

  38. ahem said,

    February 3, 2007 at 4:59

    Patterico is such a fucking tool. Anyone care to see how many wire reports from 9/11 talked about a single light airplane hitting a single WTC tower?

  39. Lawnguylander said,

    February 3, 2007 at 4:59

    Hadley, foe.

  40. cokane said,

    February 3, 2007 at 4:59

    doesnt patterico rhyme with madly ho

  41. Walt said,

    February 3, 2007 at 5:04

    “Shatly Flow”? Hmmm. Blast it. Needs work….

  42. scarshapedstar said,

    February 3, 2007 at 5:05

    green eyeshade

    More like green eyeshadow, imo.

  43. Lawnguylander said,

    February 3, 2007 at 5:16

    Hadley, foe

    Forgot the link for that.

    http://www.crooksandliars.com/2007/02/02/nie-its-worse-than-a-civil-war/

  44. Shat the sheets oh no­™ said,

    February 3, 2007 at 5:23

    Darn liberalterrafascistmexihomo-islamicommies!

    If only I could remember to hide under the bed before I crap the sheets worrying about what’s under the bed.

  45. Robert Green said,

    February 3, 2007 at 5:26

    gavin m, you’re wrong. ham of libery, you are right.

    the AP NEVER FUCKING REPORTED AS FACT THAT ANYTHING WAS DESTROYED.

    i’m hyperventilating. look, gavin, we are on the same side here, but you are missing the forest for the trees, or the forest fire, or something. the AP reported that “Some Sunnis said stuff was destroyed.”

    that is a fact claim. the fact claimed, you ask? the fact claimed is that some sunnis said something. did retard assfuck michelle malkin go ask sunnis if they in fact told the ap that? no. did moronospheroid bryan ask them? no.

    i will also note that if the AP had someone claiming “Destruction” (talk about destruction, you talk about destruction), and then later changed the report to a direct eyewitness two sourced account that didn’t include the claim of the sunnis, that would be this thing called reporting.

    this whole thing, even our defense of it, has been bullshit. as usual, the right is so fucking stupid that they have us chasing shadows in order to knock down claims that are incorrect even in their naissance. it just makes us look like assholes.

    we’ve been led down the garden path because we took something about malkin at face value. beneath her contempt for the MSM lies her contempt for truth, her contempt for facts, her contempt for logic. she’s the vidalia onion of lies, and i, for one, am sick of peeling her down. it just makes me cry.

  46. Kathy said,

    February 3, 2007 at 5:28

    Rhymes with “Badly, D’oh!”

  47. Badly Flow said,

    February 3, 2007 at 5:29

    They’re basing a whole giant edifice of insinuation and rage on the word ‘destroyed’ in that one early AP feed, which was never published in that form.

    See here now, Gavin, they can’t help it if they’ve got such good eyes for detail they often miss the forest for the trees.

    Focus on the positive! Consider Jillian’s suggestion of strawberry-scented stickers. Or shower them with annieangel’s roses whenever they manage not to tie their shoes together and/or make it through 24 hours without mentioning the AP.

    Am I aiming too high here? Dreaming too big? Is it time for us all to admit that the War on Stupid is an unwinnable quagmire?

  48. ilyka said,

    February 3, 2007 at 5:32

    she’s the vidalia onion of lies

    LIAR! Vidalia onions are exceptionally sweet.

  49. a different brad said,

    February 3, 2007 at 5:37

    Ok, fun as pointing out Patterico’s poor reading skills is, time to go eat and try and find a bar where the music isn’t so loud I can’t hear people six inches away speak.
    Keep at him, and ask him if he’s billing the state of california for this debate.

  50. Kathy said,

    February 3, 2007 at 5:38

    Spittle Bean Buttdolls

  51. a different brad said,

    February 3, 2007 at 5:41

    And one last point to consider is that the AP didn’t even actually change the word destroyed in the later report. They simply didn’t repeat the claim of destruction. Small but significant difference in this utter wankery gotcha bullshit.

  52. Smiling Mortician said,

    February 3, 2007 at 5:54

    (Boo) Radley. Whoa.

    And yes, the no-bombed-mosques-no-burned-guys-AP-liar-liar-pants-on-fire story is a complete non-starter.

    Can we talk about something else now? Like maybe . . . ah, screw it, there’s never any really good news. Go ahead and keep slamming that idiot Patterico and his innumerate pal Ace. Mind if I pour another scotch? Anybody want one?

  53. Gentlewoman said,

    February 3, 2007 at 5:55

    When the time comes to do a TV appearance, they choose the one with the cleanest shirt.

    Assofspades has been on the teevee??? Maybe when they panned the ‘crowd’ at the Freeper counter-protest last week?

    Please tell me you are referring to some public-access Wayne and Garthathon that he tapes in his basement. Or an episode of America’s Funniest Home Videos.

    I mean, I know that stupid prat Dan Riehl has been on the teevee, and that they let him opine on stuff just as though he were not a demented fuckwit, but I thought even Fox would draw the line somewhere.

    Next, you’ll be telling me that the A-I Rottweiler has been on Good Morning America or something.

  54. Cutler John said,

    February 3, 2007 at 6:09

    I think the no-cojones warbloggers are Nadly Faux.

    The 2000 election was, chadly, woe.

    Did Sam Brownback have a high-top fade back in the day? Radly, ‘fro!

  55. annieangel said,

    February 3, 2007 at 6:30

    So like ummmmm, ,was it destroyed or not Gavin? First you say it was, becuase like the minaret was damaged, now you make a post claiming from what I can see, that saying it was destroyed was obviously a mistake that was corrected….make up your mind. LOL! You can’t have it both ways…..

  56. Bullsmith said,

    February 3, 2007 at 6:33

    Re: JamilhusseinAPmegagate.

    Despite MM and Patterico’s most inspired wishpicking of imaginary nits, it turns out the facts are, gladly, so.

  57. Left_wing_fox said,

    February 3, 2007 at 6:34

    Is it time for us all to admit that the War on Stupid is an unwinnable quagmire?

    What, you didn’t realize that? The rest of us are just here for the Quagmire-wrestling matches.

  58. Pinko Punko said,

    February 3, 2007 at 7:36

    Rhymes with Spladly,Snow!

  59. teh l4m3 said,

    February 3, 2007 at 7:38

    doesnt patterico rhyme with madly ho

    Sadly, no. There’s an extra syllable, and the accent would have to be on “ri” besides…

  60. DRJ said,

    February 3, 2007 at 7:40

    From Gavin M.’s original post:

    “If you’ve used Lexis-Nexis much, you’re already laughing like a fat chief. It’s a commercial database that archives everything that’s emitted from mainstream news sources — such as, for instance, raw AP feeds, which commonly go through several successive versions as a story develops.”

    It sounds as if you believe the version of the AP article that claimed 4 mosques were destroyed has disappeared. If you mean the AP doesn’t have it on its website, I agree, but the AP’s report of 4 destroyed mosques was released to its media customers and still appears at several websites.

    Just so we’re on the same page, here’s the complete AP article that was released 11/24/06:

    Sunnis Say Shiites Burn Their Buildings
    By QAIS AL-BASHIR
    ASSOCIATED PRESS

    BAGHDAD, Iraq (AP) – Sunni residents in a volatile northwest Baghdad neighborhood claimed Friday that revenge-seeking Shiite militiamen had destroyed four Sunni mosques, burned homes and killed many people, while the Shiite-dominated police force stood by and did nothing.

    The reports were the most serious allegations of retribution in Baghdad the day after Sunni insurgents killed 215 people and wounded 257 with five car bombs and mortar fire in the capital’s Sadr City Shiite slum.

    Police officials in the region told Associated Press reporters that nothing had happened in the Hurriyah district, a once-mixed Shiite-Sunni neighborhood that has increasingly come under the control of the Mahdi Army of radical anti-American Shiite cleric Muqtada al-Sadr.

    The Sunni residents, who would not allow use of their names for fear of retribution, said militiamen were blocking them from entering burned homes to claim the bodies of victims killed in the fires.”

    As of 2/2/2007, this article is posted at the websites of the San Diego Union Tribune, the Las Vegas Sun, the Philadelphia Intelligencer Phillyburbs.com, and a Boston TV station website, WHDH 7 News. In addition, the report is in the international media at the websites of Yahoo’s Asia News, Ireland’s BreakingNews:ie, and Canada’s Ottawa Recorder. There may be more websites where this article appears that I missed.

    There is misinformation on the web under the AP’s byline. For that reason alone, AP needs to send their clients a correction.

  61. GoatBoy said,

    February 3, 2007 at 7:41

    I like madly ho pie!

  62. DUDACKATTACK!! said,

    February 3, 2007 at 7:52

    Ugh, now its Acehole who is touting the Bush “boom” like the junuior jurnalists!!1! at Whizbang! who equally desreve a kick in the crotch with a Jim West bladed boot in the crotch.

    As the Sadly No! Reasearch Labs demonstrate, THERE HAS BEEN NO FUCKING GROWTH DURING THE BUSH PRESIDENCY. If there has been any growth anywhere it’s been in the national debt, nearing 1 trillion dollars by the time Bush is out of the White House.

    That is a stack of $1000.00 dollar bills (yes, they are no longer minted but this is a nice lesson, nonetheless) that would be 65 miles high.

    Let’s tie this around the necks of those responsible. Who is willing to push a wingut only tax bill? A Cheetos tariff? A tax exemption for enlistees?

  63. Gladly Blow! said,

    February 3, 2007 at 8:16

    I’m awestruck with the “reasoning” of the decorticated twits of the right. Pattycake’s lame faux proof really takes the biscuit in stunning stupidity. I’m struck, too, that Magalangadingdong went all the way to Iraq to attempt to debunk a story she obviously never even read. I bet they’d love to have one of those sick trophy Iraqi brains in jars, as they’re the only brains they would ever posess.

  64. Qetesh the Abyssinian said,

    February 3, 2007 at 8:21

    Reptile Study, Canoeing, and Fishing

    Is that like Quiet Study? Or Bible Study? Did you study your reptile in order to fight off temptation?

    Hey, just curious.

    Hai li doh.

    I realise that no-one knows what that means, which is a pity, and makes me feel like a total prat. Ahem. It’s Cantonese for “Here it is”, and the extra dollop of irony is that the tones used in this phrase are almost the same you’d use in saying “Sadly, no”. Not bad, considering that Cantonese has anywhere between 6 and 10 tones for each syllable.

    Yes, I know no-one cares.

    Yes, I have no friends.

  65. Gavin M. said,

    February 3, 2007 at 8:22

    As of 2/2/2007, this article is posted at the websites of the San Diego Union Tribune, the Las Vegas Sun, the Philadelphia Intelligencer Phillyburbs.com, and a Boston TV station website, WHDH 7 News. In addition, the report is in the international media at the websites of Yahoo’s Asia News, Ireland’s BreakingNews:ie, and Canada’s Ottawa Recorder. There may be more websites where this article appears that I missed.

    Ah, so it is. You know, I Googled the hell out of this, but every single item that came up under multiple terms (and I mean every single solitary item) was Jamilgate cruft. I stand corrected, however, and will post tomorrow saying so.

    There is misinformation on the web under the AP’s byline. For that reason alone, AP needs to send their clients a correction.

    Um, no. Do a search for possible terrorist bombs in Boston and tell me how many stories there are on the Web describing these possible bombs.

    The way it works is that early reports are supplanted by later ones, not that they’re ‘disappeared’ from human record, leaving no trace. This is how it works with every news story.

  66. DRJ said,

    February 3, 2007 at 8:33

    Gavin,

    Thank you for your response and I think I understand your last point. I agree the AP can’t police the internet for every mistake or potential correction but I believe this story is material and should be corrected.

    Specifically, I think this story is important because it is a part of the burning Sunnis story, and that was the point when the media labeled Iraq a civil war. It also perpetuated the idea that Iraqis can’t depend on the Iraqi police. I acknowledge distrust of the police may be justified in some cases, but this article provides questionable support for that belief.

    Basically, I want to know whether or not this story is true. That won’t make Iraq any less dangerous or less of a problem. However, it’s unfair to shout this story from the rooftops in order to dramatically impact public perceptions, but to remain silent when the true facts reveal something less dramatic.

  67. Auguste said,

    February 3, 2007 at 8:45

    Bad brie, Flow!

  68. DRJ said,

    February 3, 2007 at 9:00

    Gavin,

    I’m not a regular commenter and I’m not sure when/if I’ll return, but I want to thank you for the opportunity to comment.

  69. Grammarmaster Subject And The Furious Predicate said,

    February 3, 2007 at 9:26

    I believe this story is material and should be corrected

    I believe you are all a bunch of backwoods morons. I believe you need to learn about subjects and predicates. I believe I am going insane from dumbness poisoning.

    Look. From the very report you cited:

    Sunni residents in a volatile northwest Baghdad neighborhood claimed Friday that revenge-seeking Shiite militiamen had destroyed four Sunni mosques, burned homes and killed many people, while the Shiite-dominated police force stood by and did nothing.

    The subject of the sentence (and so help me sweet Jesus you had better not argue with me about this, lest I beat you soundly with this book) is RESIDENTS, modified by SUNNI. The predicate, or “crazy verb part,” if you prefer, is CLAIMED.

    Who did a thing? RESIDENTS. What kind of residents? SUNNI (in a volatile neighborhood in northwest Baghdad, but let’s not risk confusing anybody right now). What thing did they do? CLAIMED. Everything else afterwards just tells you what they claimed. The AP could just as well have published this:

    Sadly, No! residents in a volatile comment thread claimed Friday that gullible internet yokels had destroyed all their own credibility, proclaimed Dan Riehl “The Smartest Man Ever Times Infinity,” and murdered many potentially interesting discussions, while the PJM-dominated thug force sat around bwa-ha-ha-ing at the whole dismal spectacle.

    . . . and the subject would still be “residents” and the predicate would still be “claimed.” All “destroyed” tells you, DRJ, is what the fuck the residents claimed.

    You don’t have a problem with the AP. You have a problem with the Sunni residents. So hop a plane and go argue with them.

    Fuck me, did I really just sit here and type all this out?

  70. RZ said,

    February 3, 2007 at 9:28

    Pam’s drunk again at Atlas Shrugs!

  71. Robert Green said,

    February 3, 2007 at 9:40

    yo DRJ

    do you understand what the furious predicate is saying? do you understand that the thing you think, sorry the thing you are told to say by dissembling idiot michelle malkin, is not a thing? do you understand at long fucking last that you’ve been had? the AP, never, not today, not in a million years, reported that a bunch of mosques had been destroyed. they reported that some had claimed such a thing had happened. deal with this fact. deal with it in writing, right here on this blog.

    not yesterday. not at the san diego tribune. not on a boat, not on a plane, not in a car, not with goat, not in a tree, DRJ and MM let me be!!! i will not be lied to by a bunch of fucking scum con artist assholes, sorry i mean eat green eggs and ham.

  72. colleen said,

    February 3, 2007 at 9:47

    OK, I’m tired, both sides provide “proof”. Does it matter? Aren’t there 100′s of other examples? Every day in every way?

  73. Incontinentia Buttocks said,

    February 3, 2007 at 10:01

    Pam’s drunk again at Atlas Shrugs!

    It’s a measure of the nearly unbearable, monotonous stupid of Jamilgate that checkin’ out whatever the Shrieking Harpy is up to seems like a potentially interesting thing to do.

  74. kingubu said,

    February 3, 2007 at 10:24

    So, when its all said and done, the whole mindnumbing thing could’ve been preempted if the damn Wingnuts had only paid attention during Schoolhouse Rock.

    Why do I suddenly feel tired all over?

  75. colleen said,

    February 3, 2007 at 10:39

    Kingbu,I am mr norton, what do you mean? (I know how a bill is made, though)

  76. Anne Laurie said,

    February 3, 2007 at 11:51

    Because seriously, without wingnut conspiracy theories, what else do they have?

    Internet porn, if the marketing studies are to be believed. Also cheetos. My granny said that looking at porn made men go blind, and eating junk food made kids stupid. I used to think she was a narrow-minded old biddy, but Patsy & Friends are doing their best to support her arguments. I just hope the State of California has pr0n firewalls in place.

  77. JK47 said,

    February 3, 2007 at 12:24

    All “destroyed� tells you, DRJ, is what the fuck the residents claimed.

    Thank you, Grammarmaster. DRJ is obviously not the brightest bulb in the chandelier. “Jamilgate” is the wingnut equivalent of Nigel Tufnel’s custom Marshall amp. The stupid goes to eleven.

  78. Herr Doktor Bimler said,

    February 3, 2007 at 12:52

    Smiling Mortician said,
    Mind if I pour another scotch? Anybody want one?

    Umm, is this a trick question?

  79. Splatterico said,

    February 3, 2007 at 14:57

    Specifically, I think this story is important because it is a part of the burning Sunnis story, and that was the point when the media labeled Iraq a civil war.

    Aha! The explanation of Jamilgate!

    It’s important because it’s part of the “burning Sunnis” anecdote… the existence of which allowed the Perfidious Press to start LABELLING Iraq (don’t you hate it when people LABEL you?) a “civil war”… thus EMBOLDENING the enemy, possibly even EMBIGGENING them into cromulent victory over the Sunnis.

    Those BASTARDS! I blame the Ottawa Recorder.

  80. His Grace said,

    February 3, 2007 at 15:42

    Specifically, I think this story is important because it is a part of the burning Sunnis story, and that was the point when the media labeled Iraq a civil war.

    OK, DMJ, you might have a point had this scenario folded out:

    Scene: A peaceful Iraq, serene, children playing. Some hand out flowers to American Troops. All is well and peaceful.

    Next Scene: Enter the villain, Jamil Hussein or Mohamed Osama bin-Al Zawahiri the super terrorist (his real name). He meets a bored cowardly AP reporter named John Kerry Clinton.

    JKC: Boy, I sure am scared to go out and report the new freedom schools being painted. I wonder why everyone hates me.

    JH: Well, that’s true. It’s a civil war going on out in Iraq.

    JKC: Really? It’s that bad is it? I don’t leave my hotel room much (except to go to the bar, so I rely on you, Jamil Hussein, to report everything that is going on.

    JH: Well yes, the Shiites burned some Sunnis the other day.

    JKC: Wow, that’s news.

    JH: They even destroyed 4 mosques… with death rays.

    JKC: You sure about the death rays part?

    JH: Absolutely.

    JKC: Then I’d better write a story now telling the world what a mess Iraq is.

    JH (as an aside): AHAH! Now the American Infidels will think that all is lost in Iraq (even though they were greeted as liberators). They will lose their will to fight, because that is the only way that we can defeat the unstoppable forces of good and freedom.

    Unfortunately, (with those words being bloodlessly damning in my opinion), Iraqi is in a civil war regardless of whether 4 mosques were burned down or one had a gigantic hole in it, or whether Sunnis got burned alive, or were they merely just shot execution style in the head. Both the Shiites and the Sunnis are employing Death Squads and engaging in various acts of ethnic cleansing. There is an indigenous resistance movement fighting against the mainly Shiite Government and the US forces propping it up.

    This IS a civil war, whether or NOT the AP decides to call it that (for political reasons). The NEI even said that Iraq is worse than a civil war. And this is just what is happening now. If the US starts a war with Iran, tries to destroy Al-Sadr, or just merely tries to consolidate its position in Kurdistan by giving Kirkuk to the Kurds, you’ll really start to see the shit hitting the fan.

  81. owlbear1 said,

    February 3, 2007 at 15:59

    Sunni residents in a volatile northwest Baghdad neighborhood claimed
    Sunni residents in a volatile northwest Baghdad neighborhood claimed
    Sunni residents in a volatile northwest Baghdad neighborhood claimed
    Sunni residents in a volatile northwest Baghdad neighborhood claimed
    Sunni residents in a volatile northwest Baghdad neighborhood claimed
    Sunni residents in a volatile northwest Baghdad neighborhood claimed

    Just for you DRJ.

  82. owlbear1 said,

    February 3, 2007 at 16:02

    DRJ, even if you don’t clap when Tinkerbell asks, Peter Pan still lives. Take a chance next time and find out.

  83. Brad R. said,

    February 3, 2007 at 16:07

    OK, I’ll concede that this 155 word feed is a piece of sloppy reporting. When you lead off with “Sunni residents claim,” you really should go to the site to see if they’re telling you the truth. The subsequent AP articles modified the language to “burned” and “blew up” instead of “destroyed,” which is a more accurate description of what happened. If the AP wants to run a correction of this original news wire (which was apparently picked up by some papers), go right ahead. At the very least, goons like Paterico might finally STFU about it.

  84. po - PoliticaObscura said,

    February 3, 2007 at 16:19

    LOL

    Looks like your goose is cooked and you are wrong. The feed wasn’t only up for 20 minutes. It still exists in stories in Canada, Asia, Ireland, Philadelphia, San Diego, Las Vegas, and Boston according to the latest info.

    So this idea that this false AP story was corrected before being published is a joke… don’t you know how to use google?

  85. His Grace said,

    February 3, 2007 at 16:46

    Looks like your goose is cooked and you are wrong.

    Damn our ass is sure handed to us. AP made a mistake and the horrors, it got picked up by newspapers. I guess we’ll have to admit that there isn’t a civil war in Iraq. Just death squads, complete lack of security, an indigenous insurgency and ethnic cleansing with the NIE saying that there is no short term Reconciliation possible. Yes, getting the AP to make a correction about a story posted in a war zone (which given the chaotic nature of war are always expected to be 100% accurate) will help America solve all of those problems in Iraq.

  86. Matt Weiner said,

    February 3, 2007 at 16:47

    goons like Paterico might finally STFU about it.

    Hee hee. Suuuuure they might.

  87. Matt Weiner said,

    February 3, 2007 at 16:49

    And, fuck this correction shit anyway. A building with half its roof blown off, like that mosque in the picture, is destroyed enough that no correction is needed.

  88. Nattering Nabob said,

    February 3, 2007 at 17:08

    The wingnuts do this shit just to make you guys get all nutzo. NO ONE is as stupid as they are. They’re cunningly contriving the most idiotic bullshit imaginable just so our energies will be diverted.

    Nadly. Whoa!

  89. Nim, ham hock of liberty said,

    February 3, 2007 at 17:24

    OK, so the AP has to issue a correction because what the Sunnis told them might, arguably, have been hyperbolic. And therefore we can’t trust the AP in general.

    So, every time they report lies and bullshit that are preceded with “Tony Snow claimed….” they have to issue subsequent corrections, retroactively pull the stories, and we can’t trust anything they say, because they have the temerity to repeat WH claims that later turn out to be arguably hyperbolic?

  90. Nim, ham hock of liberty said,

    February 3, 2007 at 17:26

    Dick Cheney claimed the insurgents are in their “last throes.”

    OH NOES!!!11!!! I did it too!

  91. Smiling Mortician said,

    February 3, 2007 at 17:40

    Good morning. I see we’re still arguing about whether the AP is responsible for the veracity of every person it interviews. This would be fine, were it not for the fact that it is much, much too early for scotch.

  92. Shat the sheets oh no­™ said,

    February 3, 2007 at 17:41

    Shat the sheets oh no­™ (rhymes with Patterico) claims that Dick Cheney is actually the spirit of Yog-Sothoth, who returned to earth on January 30, 1941 and took possession of a newborn infant.

    Yog-Sothoth enjoys torturing people, war, and dodging the draft.

  93. Sadly, No! » The Correction to AP Should Give said,

    February 3, 2007 at 17:49

    [...] It’s like a magic trick. Sometimes I think it would be easier to bend a spoon mentally than to make that transformation. « New Innovations In WTF?ery Feb3 [...]

  94. Sunni. Residents. said,

    February 3, 2007 at 17:53

    We Sunni residents very sorry we claimed Shiites destroy our houses and mosques and kill our neighbors and families.

    All big joke, see? Everything great over here.

    You come over see for yourself, Mister Puerto-Rico.

    Next week we officially re-naming all neighborhood streets!

    There’s “Rumsfeld Street”, “Cheney Street”, “Bush Street” and even “No Civil War Street”.

    Things very good here for investors, so you bring lotsa money with you when you come!

  95. dexter said,

    February 3, 2007 at 17:56

    …and so, it was the associated press on the grassy knoll all along!

  96. Non Nato said,

    February 3, 2007 at 18:29

    4 million Iraqi refugees and 600 000 Iraqis killed and all pro-war activists can come up with is quibbling about semantics? Take a look in the mirror, do you like what you see? You should try and preserve your own dignity while you still can.

  97. Robin Grant said,

    February 3, 2007 at 18:35

    Has everyone on the right learned English using ‘Hooked on Phonics’? Sure they know how to read and write but there is zero comprehension.

    DRJ quotes an AP peice: “BAGHDAD, Iraq (AP) – Sunni residents in a volatile northwest Baghdad neighborhood claimed Friday that revenge-seeking Shiite militiamen had destroyed four Sunni mosques, burned homes and killed many people, while the Shiite-dominated police force stood by and did nothing.”

    Does that paragraph say that AP is reporting on the destruction of these mosques.

    Obviously NOT!

    AP is reporting that Sunni Residents have claimed that these mosques were destroyed. There is nothing wrong with that story and there is no need for AP to issue a correction or apology or anything!

  98. PaulG said,

    February 3, 2007 at 19:38

    OK and this is all fine, but you’ve screwed up the econ data chart. You’ve got Clinton president for nine years. If anybody on the right can count that is.

  99. Sporty said,

    February 3, 2007 at 19:41

    This post is a masterpiece! Thank you guys for brightening up an already sunny Saturday.

    Now, who is responsible for the “Not Sporty”?!?

  100. Bradley J. Fikes said,

    February 3, 2007 at 19:46

    Quoting the residents without fact-checking may be okay when you don’t have time to before filing the story. First rough draft of history and all that. But it turned out the information was wrong, which makes the story misleading. Any ethical news organization would not want to mislead readers. So a correction is called for, both to make sure readers who rely on AP are not misinformed, and for AP’s own reputation of being factually scrupulous.

    Those who think that it’s okay not to correct a statement that turned out to be untrue, just because they accurately quoted those who gave the misinformation, should look into a career at the Weekly World News.

  101. owlbear1 said,

    February 3, 2007 at 19:53

    Or be Press Secretary for a bloodthirsty war-mongering demagogue of a President.

  102. g said,

    February 3, 2007 at 21:25

    Oops. They said 6 people were burned, but it was unconfirmed. Guess that means everything is OK in Iraq.

  103. Jillian said,

    February 3, 2007 at 21:29

    Shorter Patterico…

    waves hands in your face “I’m not touching you!! I’m not touching you!!!

    “What, I said I wasn’t touching you!”

  104. g said,

    February 3, 2007 at 21:39

    But it turned out the information was wrong

    Wrong? How so?

    “Shiite militiamen had DESTROYED four Sunni mosques, burned homes and killed many people,” – wrong

    “Shiite militiamen had FIRE BOMBED AND BLOWN UP four Sunni mosques, burned homes and killed many people,” – right

    hairsplitting? not me…..

    Seriously, folks. It would be different if our media issued corrections about other hearsay reports that turned out to not be true, such as “Tony Snow said…..”

  105. Julie O. said,

    February 3, 2007 at 22:15

    BWAHA! U SADLY SUxXxORZ R PWNED 4 EVAR!11

  106. Mrs Panstreppon said,

    February 3, 2007 at 22:16

    First time visitor. You guys here are a lot funnier than the folks at the TPM Cafe where I usually post. Plus you save me the trouble of having to actually visit a wingnut site to see what the head cases are up to.

    The last time I visited MS. Malkin’s site, she had linked to a story about an Egyptian college student in Tennessee who had charged $2,000 worth of pilot related stuff on his credit card. That story never had “wings” as far as I could tell.

    Thanks for the laughs!

  107. Ernst Blofeld said,

    February 3, 2007 at 22:43

    So, Gavin, where’s your retraction and apology to Patterico? He has in fact shown that the AP “destroyed” story ran in many newspapers around the world, contrary to your assertion. You’d think that common deceny and a regard for the facts would dictate that you, personally, acknowledge that you Got It Wrong.

    http://patterico.com/2007/02/03/5770/ap-and-now-sadly-no-owes-a-correction/

  108. MV said,

    February 3, 2007 at 23:05

    Patterico has ripped this post apart. How do you like your crow cook Gavin?

  109. GoatBoy said,

    February 3, 2007 at 23:14

    I like my crow cooked in a pie!

    _____________
    Gamera vs. Zigra

  110. ahem said,

    February 4, 2007 at 2:54

    When you lead off with “Sunni residents claim,� you really should go to the site to see if they’re telling you the truth.

    “Light plane hits World Trade Center.” — and that was somewhere with a shitload of contemporaneous TV coverage.

    Patricia’s paeons are rather dull, no?

  111. Steve T. said,

    February 5, 2007 at 0:12

    Let’s set aside AP and the mosques for a moment and look at the economics point Ace was trying to make. His January 31 post claimed that “the Dow looks on its way to setting a new record” and tried to buttress his claim with a chart, showing one-day trading going from about 12630 to about 12670, with a brief peak above 12680.

    The trouble was that the chart was clearly labeled February 1, leading Gavin to ponder on whether Ace has a functioning time machine. Problem solved. If you follow Ace’s link today, Sunday Feb. 4, you find that the chart has now changed to show trading data from February 2, last Friday. Incidentally, it shows the Dow dropping back to about 12655.

    Clearly, when inserting the graph he inadvertently embedded a link to a source which automatically updates at the end of each trading day. I’m sure that by tomorrow evening it will be showing February 5 data. And it must be inadvertent, as the graph now displayed directly contradicts the point he was trying to make.

    No, Ace doesn’t have a time machine. What he does have is an inability to master Internet basics.

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