Tonight, Levin responded on his show by spending nearly an hour pleading for anyone who has slept with Keith Olbermann to contact his show so he could publicly verify that Keith was “hung like a thumbtack”.

Class.

Now, were you intelligent, you could say you believe there’s a x % chance the marriage won’t be recognised — on account of me having neither religious affiliation nor civic status — you might even say 100%. What you cannot say is that the happy couple were not married.

Noble? Noble? Perhaps Limbaugh might also receive honorary degrees from Harbard University, Yule University, and MET.

I’m not going to charge you for the keyboard, but the tea-out-my-nose-related medical bills are going to cost you. And I am wearing a Yale sweatshirt as I type, but I would so totally go to Yule University, where every day is a holiday.

does that mean that Distort D’Newsa and his colleagues at the Hoover could do so, after they give up on working to have it awarded Bush, Cheney, and Rumsfeld?

I believe that Dinette is merely a Fellow at the Hoover Intellectual Vaccum, so he probably can’t even nominate anyone for the cleaning contract for his office.

She was upset and confused because she thought they were male prostitutes and that ‘bese mi culo’ was Spanish for ‘eat my p***y’.

peeps?a

Mazel tov in advance. But what about your wife?

[/ relocate 30 comments upthread so as to appear somewhat timely]

Christ that’s stupid. I mean, yeah, you can find people at my local KFC who speak fluent Spanish… But having been born here, they’re also native English speakers.

I can’t be sure, but this probably means academics with the special rank of “University Professor”, which is something that isn’t handed out very often, and only to faculty that have world acclaim at the most prestigious universities. This keeps Rush from receiving a nomination from someone on the “faculty” at Bob Jones “University”.

On the brighter side, it means Noam Chomsky can nominate people – though I’m not sure if linguistics fits under this criteria. He is, however, an “Institute Professor”, which is MIT’s equivalent of “University Professor”.

The “Nobel laureates” thing is a bit disturbing – so, theoretically, Kissinger can nominate whomever he chooses, and it’s a valid nomination. Oh, dear…

“Mein Fuehrer! I can valk!”

Too bad we aren’t THAT lucky….

I recommend Newman’s Own with butter. ‘S gonna be fun.

Sure, sure, the “Academy” may not recognize my nomination for Best Screenplay, or Best Supporting Actress, or Best Documentary Short, and all the rest, but I’ve been nominated — and the smarty-pants Hollywood elitists are just going to have to live with it.

If you’ll excuse me, I have to go get fitted for my tuxedo and start writing my acceptance speech. Speeches.

And, of course, I’ve got to decide what I’ll do when they announce my name as the winner! If it’s that liberal George Clooney, I’ll probably yell at him to cram the Oscar up his ass. But if it’s Scarlett Johannson, I’ll run up, accept the award, and then whisk her away to a romantic location. We’ll get married, and be the bestest of friends, and live happily forever and ever with our fourteen children named Brandeen.