Shooting straight is never easy when you’re all adrenalized up. The agent shoulda taken a couple hits on the readily available pot; would’ve steadied his aim right up.

In NYC…nevermind.

“The agents shot at him 15 times, hitting him once, knocking Aldrete to the ground.”

I guess we should be thankful these idiots couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn…

Maybe the suspect’s buttocks are front-side, like Jerome’s.

Lesley, I think you’re confused. Just because Jerome talks out of his ass doesn’t mean it’s located on the front side.

Brilliant!

Good satire is getting harder to write ’cause crazy idiots are taking it as gospel.

OK. I’m over my snit. Isn’t snit a great word?

aw, I was working on a killer “Smiling Mortsnitian” joke….

James, this is hysterical. Are you sure you didn’t go to college with me? This is classic “philosophical ponderings in the true Classical symposia tradition” (e.g. drunk off your ass and scouting out all the possible sex partners: if their brains don’t explode at your premise, they get a check in the “doable” column).

Folks, allow me to give you a little friendly advice.

Step 1: When you come across a trollish comment, like the one left by James, the first thing you should do is check to see if that commenter has a link to his/her home page. In this case, James’ name functions as link to said homepage.

Step 2: When reaching that page, poke around a bit. Read a few posts. Just what side does it appear this person is on? Now, in my case, I don’t really ever blog about politics. So what to do?

Step 3: Feel free to use this as step 2 if you choose. But anyway, I always find checking the sidebar helpful. Let’s see who James links to. Jumping right out are:
Sadly, No!
Noam Chomsky
Crooks and Liars
Jesus’ General
Red State Son
Orcinus

Looks like a lot of lefties. But wait! There’s that Red State Son blog. Maybe James just likes to link to a little from column A, and a little from column B. So let’s check that one out:
Against the War on Terror
Iraq Vets Against the War
Juan Cole
Antiwar.com
Margaret Cho

Nope, looks like he/she’s a lefty too. I think the evidence is pretty clear that our friend James is not a troll, but rather is having a little fun playing right-wing nutjob. It’s sarcasm.

Now, that took me all of about 45 seconds, and it kept me from writing a post where I may have taken him seriously, thereby making myself look like an idiot. Please, use this advice in the future, and think before you write things like:
(You like Texas don’t you? It’s where your beloved leader hails from.)

Also, the part where he calls his own post satire is a pretty good clue as well.

Take Texas, for example. (You like Texas don’t you? It’s where your beloved leader hails from.)

Parameters for Use of Deadly Force:

1. Officers may use deadly force only when the officer reasonably believes that the action is in defense of human life, including the officer’s own life, or in defense of any person in imminent danger of serious physical injury.
2. Officers are not authorized to fire their weapons in order to subdue an escaping suspect who presents no immediate threat of death or serious injury.
3. System Police policy C-3 requires an arresting officer to identify themselves as a police officer and to state their purpose before effecting an arrest. The officer should communicate this in a clear, audible voice.
4. When possible, before using a firearm, officers shall identify themselves and their intent to fire.
5. An officer may also use a firearm under the following circumstances:
1. During range practice and qualification or competitive sporting events.
2. To destroy an animal that represents a threat to public safety, or as a humanitarian measure where the animal is seriously injured. The officer will obtain a supervisor’s permission before taking such action.
6. Officers shall adhere to the following restrictions when their weapon is exhibited:
1. Except for maintenance or during training, officers shall not draw or exhibit their firearm unless circumstances create reasonable cause to believe that it may be necessary to use the weapon in conformance with this policy.
2. Warning shots are prohibited. Officers shall not fire their weapons at or from a moving vehicle except in defense of life.
3. Firearms shall not be discharged when it appears that an innocent person may be injured.

I don’t know where you live. Zimbabwe perhaps?

Flying Rodent, I swear I saw the exact same thing happen just last week. You can’t trust those limb-sprouting, ass-holster-toting bastards.

And mikey, I think maybe it was more of a hiney-ous crime, y’know?

Exactly… “fleeing while Brown” has been declared the new “driving while Black”. As a side note, remember that the C-Plus Augustus got his first news headline (in the Yale paper) defending the arse-branding of fraternity pledges with a red-hot coathanger. Ergo, the use of non-lethal force in the gluteal region is grandfathered into the law under the ancient precept “It’s okay if you’re a Republican” (IOIYAR)…

And speaking of ancient law-enforcement-cum-Republican traditions, how long before it is announced that 740 pounds of marijuana has a street value of $9,867,458,347.37 — thereby making this heinous smuggler single-handedly responsible for the U.S. trade deficit over a period of at least a month?

Dipshit says Jones notes that 18 U.S.C. Section 18 U.S.C. Section 924(c) has only been applied to law enforcement officers who themselves commit heinous crimes, such as sexual assault…. So I guess in HIS world shooting someone in the ass is not a heinous crime. Oh sure, as pranks go it’s a fairly nasty one, and I’m sure he would definately support a reprimand for real world ass-shooting. As always, I am compelled to wonder if it was HIS ass that was shot, would he feel that was a more heinous crime than the shooting in the ass of a Mexican guy?

mikey