30
…And Arcs of Toilet Paper Gladdened the Election-Day Sky
Today’s Democrats mess on America’s doorstep
Marie Jon’
October 25, 2006
We have been bombarded with vicious and unwarranted politicking over Iraq and the war on terror for more than five years. The constant attacks have demoralized our citizens and our troops serving their country.
Most of us have felt frustrated and angered by what we observe coming from those who call themselves liberal progressives. They have managed to turn our country inside out. They have willfully divided the nation for their own selfish objectives.
Wars are “lost at home” because citizens lack the will to stand up and do what is correct. Blame the media and a party that is morally bankrupt and corrupt. “I hate the Republicans and everything they stand for,” the DNC chairman Howard Dean told Democrats gathered at a Manhattan hotel, according to the New York Daily News.
Today’s Democrats contribute nothing toward the betterment of our country. Now, they have messed on America’s doorstep. It’s time to show them with your vote, just what you think of them. It’s time to scrape them off.
Ding-dong, Marie!
ifthethunderdontgetya said,
October 30, 2006 at 7:49
Better put out that fire, MJ’!
owlbear1 said,
October 30, 2006 at 8:04
Most of us have felt frustrated and angered by what we observe coming from those who call themselves liberal progressives. They have managed to turn our country inside out. They have willfully divided the nation for their own selfish objectives.
==============
Damn Libs! We’re against torture, war profiteers, and gutting the constitution!
Aren’t we all just a bunch of selfish war losers?
I mean can’t we all just sit down, shut up, and stop sapping the wills of those “True Blue Americans” who want to torture, make profit from wars, and gut the constitution to help them do both?
What the fuck is wrong with US?
islmfaoscist said,
October 30, 2006 at 8:20
The media uses yellow journalism to confuse the American public. Our people “lack wisdom” (Hosea 4:6), because our public air waves robs them of the truth.
Why, yes. Indeed they do use yellow journalism, a term orginally coined to describe the despicable profiteering of the newspaper magnates of a century ago.
The difference is that during the buildup to the Spanish-American War Pulitzer and Hearst did their fear-mongering to raise paper sales, which forced a reluctant McKinley’s hand.
Graphic illustrations commissioned from some of the country’s most-talented artists and stories written by premiere authors and journalists of the day were fodder for fueling the flames of war. Together, Hearst and Pulitzer created a frenzy among the American people by reporting the alleged brutality of the Spanish toward the Cuban rebels. (However, acts of outrage committed by the Cubans were seldom mentioned.) By the time the USS Maine exploded in Havana Harbor, the pro-war press had roused national sentiment to the point that President McKinley feared his political party would suffer if he did not engage in war with Spain.
Today’s yellow journalists, in contrast, are just shills working as a paid PR wing for a war-lusting, profiteering Military Industrial Complex, with Cheney and Rove at the helm.
Worst. President. Ever. said,
October 30, 2006 at 8:33
Wars are “lost at home� because citizens lack the will to stand up and do what is correct.
Right, Marie! Expecially the following fucking liberal traitorous bastards who REFUSE to sign up and defend their country in time of war:
Military Service Eligible Children of George W. Bush
Jenna Bush
Barbara Bush
Military Service Eligible Children of Jeb Bush
George P. Bush
Noelle Bush
John Ellis Bush Jr.
Military Service Eligible Children of Neil Bush
Lauren Bush
Pierce Bush
Military Service Eligible Children of Marvin Bush
Marshall Bush
Military Service Eligible Children of Dorothy Bush Koch
Samuel LeBlond
Ellie LeBlond
marty said,
October 30, 2006 at 8:42
** Wars are “lost at home� because citizens lack the will to stand up and do what is correct. Blame the media and a party that is morally bankrupt and corrupt. **
Damn straight!! Those damn morally bankrupt and corrupt Republicans!! Because of you, citizens lack the will to stand up and fight!!
Some Guy said,
October 30, 2006 at 9:23
Translation from “wordy wingnut” to “what I’m actually saying.”
Paragraph one: Maaaan, you guys are all narc-ing up our buzz maaaaan! kekekeke!
Paragraph 2: Hey, you know, if we turn the television around to face the wall, we don’t have to SEE or KNOW anything about what’s actually the result of five years of our policies in action! Why are the Dems pissed, anyways?
Paragraph 3: Campange strategy? Logistical support? Force deplition estimates? No, son, wars are lost cause Johnnycakes McHomefront doesn’t have yellow ribbon on his Chevy pickup!
Paragraph 4: Man, look what a shit job the Dems have done for the past half decade! Who the fuck put THEM into office?
All to easy.
Oh, and since you know Gary will try to bring it up:
Dude, if Chavez actually DOES have have controll over election machines in the US, who do you think he, a dictator who drives much of his support and notariety on the world stage by being a stand up against a uncaring, imperialistic, Corporate American Rape Machine, will rig the elections for?
Touch Feely Democrat, or Macho Macho Man Six-Shooter McLargeDick Republican blowhard?
Gary Ruppert said,
October 30, 2006 at 9:39
The dustbin of history is the fact is. Katherine Harris for president!
merlallen said,
October 30, 2006 at 10:06
Republican’ts have fucked everything up for everybody except war profiteers and it’s the Democrats fault? Damn.
Ruthie said,
October 30, 2006 at 10:50
The difference is that during the buildup to the Spanish-American War Pulitzer and Hearst did their fear-mongering to raise paper sales, which forced a reluctant McKinley’s hand.
Back in the “good old days” when “war was good for the economy….”
ifthethunderdontgetya said,
October 30, 2006 at 14:29
Did somebody say Kitty Harris for President?
Marq said,
October 30, 2006 at 14:41
Wingnut Pundits of Military Service Age: well, let’s see… for starters, there’s “Marie Jon’”….
His Grace said,
October 30, 2006 at 15:20
I think that we call all safely agree that the loss of the War in Iraq is not the fault of the people who led us into it. Not their stupid “grand strategy” of invading a country to make it a democracy. Not their complete lack of strategy and their use of slogans as a substitute, “Stay the Course” and all that. Not their use of the stupidest of tactics, like disbanding the Iraqi Army or torturing of people while condemning Saddam for the same.
No, clearly the blame lies with the people who have been right at virtually every prediction they have made, whether it was that Saddam had no WMDs, that intervening in Iraq would strengthen the Iranians, radicalize the local population, lead to civil war, or the simple notion that it is farcical to force democracy at gun point. No, our pesky predictions turned out to be right and THAT’S our fault for not reinforcing their deluded world view.
Jillian said,
October 30, 2006 at 15:22
Wouldn’t Noelle Bush’s drug conviction make her unfit for military service?
kingubu said,
October 30, 2006 at 15:46
Shorter Marie Jon’: “Dolchstoss!!!”
The only semi-interesting point here is that the right wing’s entire “plan”, no matter the topic, relies on maximum ignorance.
“People would support the war more if they didn’t ever see the consequences.”
“Teens would stop having sex if we’d just stop teaching them about birth control.”
“The answer to soaring unemployment numbers (or the illiteracy rate, or any other indicator of national health) is to stop counting or change the way we count, so the numbers don’t look so bad.”
“The only outrageous thing about the government spying on its citizens wthout warrants is that the NYT told them it was happening.”
Since Disney seems to love the Republicans so much, maybe they will give them jobs running Fantasyland after Nov. Seems a natural “fit”.
Tony said,
October 30, 2006 at 15:51
Is it me or is Marie getting lip collagen injections?
Dan Someone said,
October 30, 2006 at 16:02
Is it some sort of sign of desperation that MJ’ had to reach back to a January 30, 2005 newspaper to tag Howard Dean?
Something Polish said,
October 30, 2006 at 16:39
Not bad, let’s face it: Marie couldn’t carry Kaye Grogan’s faux leopard skin jump suit.
Notorious P.A.T. said,
October 30, 2006 at 16:43
Democrats have messed on America’s doorstep.
Huh. I thought Democrats were Americans. She makes it sound like we are next-door-neighbors who stop by for a visit every now and then.
Jay B. said,
October 30, 2006 at 17:10
Fuck the mocking.
I’m tired to death of these sick, twisted idiots. Fascists to the core. Dull, witless, bootlicking fascists whose idea of a ‘thought’ is to side with the poor little state against those completely powerless to stop their insane war — and call them shit in the process.
Fuck her. Fuck her patrons. Fuck them. For the next eight days, nothing’s funny.
g said,
October 30, 2006 at 17:22
Hugo Chavez and the Iraqi insurgents are influencing the Pennsylvania Senate race.
Uh huh.
The Iraqi government announcing the Saddam verdict 2 days before November 7th? Just a coincidence.
g said,
October 30, 2006 at 17:24
Another wingnut cognitave dissonance point I heard on the radio -
Protestors in Europe means that decadent, liberal Europe is exploding because the Europeans’ policy of multiculturalism enables muslim extremists, causing CIVIL WAR in Europe.
Iraq is in a state of Civil War? On the contrary, schools are being painted and freedom is on the march.
kdaddy said,
October 30, 2006 at 17:25
obtuse drivel clumsily opined
tommy yum said,
October 30, 2006 at 17:33
Okay. It’s obviously some kind of blogostan sweeps weeks, ‘cos S,N! has trotted out Teh Hot-Nut for to boost the comments.
It’s transparent and craven, and I for one refuse to give you the satisfaction of…
Damn. Never mind.
jw said,
October 30, 2006 at 17:35
Marie Jon’ is my dream girl. Hot and crazy is crazy hot!
Kindly old Doc Enola said,
October 30, 2006 at 18:00
Man. Our Lady of the Apostrophe jumped on that “stabbed in the back by the liberals” meme faster than Dick Cheney on a Halliburton kickback, didn’t she?
And while Marie Jon’a'long’a'dingdong is definately all crazy and hot and all, that whole “boil the bunny” thing oughta discourage any thinking person, if you know what I mean and I think you bloody well do….
She will NOT be ignored, y’know.
ACG said,
October 30, 2006 at 18:02
Wouldn’t Noelle Bush’s drug conviction make her unfit for military service?
Once upon a time, maybe. But right now, the Army will take anyone who can fog a mirror and sign their X on the dotted line.
Jack Roy said,
October 30, 2006 at 18:02
Wow, I had no idea we were in power the last six years! I was going to vote Democratic, but if we really were in a position to fuck everything up, I don’t think I can in good conscience—
What? Oh, it was the Republicans who held every lever of power while the country turned to flaming dog poop? Yeah, that’s what I thought.
KnaveRupe said,
October 30, 2006 at 18:07
“Not bad, let’s face it: Marie couldn’t carry Kaye Grogan’s faux leopard skin jump suit.”
She’s not’ fit’ to’ push’ the’ Coach’s spaghetti’.
celticgaryruppertgirl said,
October 30, 2006 at 18:10
On Noes!!!one11! Not the Bag ‘O Poo analogy! (Nice pic btw)
Marie, really honey after all this time I thought even you could do a little better than than. I really was giving you WAY too much credit I guess.
Way to lick those boots…
celticgaryruppertgirl said,
October 30, 2006 at 18:12
….than *that*
I WANT MY PREVIEW BUTTON AND I WANT IT RIGHT NOW!!!
Marita said,
October 30, 2006 at 18:23
Marie, really honey after all this time I thought even you could do a little better than than. I really was giving you WAY too much credit I guess.
To be fair to Marie, I think she was more comparing democrats to the neighbor’s dog than to a juvenile prank. Also, did Renew America give her a copy editor, or what? She still can’t write to save her life, but she isn’t quite the affront to grammar she used to be.
PS - celticgirl, did the prospects for this year’s OSU/UO game just get better, or what?
Dean said,
October 30, 2006 at 18:25
jw said,
Marie Jon’ is my dream girl. Hot and crazy is crazy hot!
“A little bit nutty, a little bit slutty?
Hysterical Woman said,
October 30, 2006 at 18:35
Wouldn’t Noelle Bush’s drug conviction make her unfit for military service?
Once upon a time, maybe. But right now, the Army will take anyone who can fog a mirror and sign their X on the dotted line.
As long as they’re straight, of course.
BlackBloc said,
October 30, 2006 at 18:40
How derivative. I see the Stabbed in the Back meme, the Triumph of the Will meme, the National Interest Trumps Selfish Class Interest meme… I have 1930s deja vu.
But the one thing you can say in favor of American fascism over German fascism is that Goebbels wasn’t as pleasing to the eye…
mikey said,
October 30, 2006 at 19:10
That’s ok, Marie, I don’t mind you borrowing my “Flaming Bag of Poo” ™ line. Except you couldn’t quite bring yourself to say it, eh? Democrats mess on America’s Porch? Mess? Like, Democrats came over to America’s house when America wasn’t home and left some old tires, coffee grounds, lawn clippings (Democratic lawn clippings at that), an old busted washer and last week’s Villiage Voice? Then the Democrats went home and peeked out the front window giggling and shushing each other, smokin a number and having gay sex to kill time until America got home. Man, the look on America’s face when they parked the car and went to open the door. America was PISSED, man. They came down to the sidewalk and looked up and down the street. Oh sure, they *knew* the Democrats were the ones that did it, but they couldn’t prove it. The real problem is now, every time the Democrats run into America it’s just SO hard to keep a straight face…
mikey
Thorlac said,
October 30, 2006 at 19:15
I don’t how I missed it before, but her lips and those bagged eyes (not bugged, btw) give Marie sort of a sleestak look. Compare.
Thorlac said,
October 30, 2006 at 19:17
That word “Compare” in my last post is a link, but it doesn’t show up visibly formatted as such on my screen. How damnably odd.
Thorlac said,
October 30, 2006 at 19:18
One more time (sigh.) Compare.
Thorlac said,
October 30, 2006 at 19:20
Fuckitol. I guess you’ll have to trust me on this.
MrWonderful said,
October 30, 2006 at 19:26
This stuff is cherce. Read the whole thing: It reels out like a demonstration of
strong A.I., a “plausible” monologue *written by software* to show that yes, damn it, a computer can simulate a human.
Of course, an actual human can somehow sense that these “opinions” are not so much thought or written as “cited” and “listed,” but come on. It’s a machine! We’re making strides!
I’d love to see her–sorry; “her”–try to write a limerick.
tigrismus said,
October 30, 2006 at 19:34
Is it me or is Marie getting lip collagen injections?
I don’t know, I haven’t seen a picture of you. ;-p
Our people “lack wisdom� (Hosea 4:6)
Hosea was soooo right, and Marie’ is the all-time prize-winning poster-girl for wisdom-lacking. Ah, well, blessed are the simple, for they will never be outnumbered.
NobodySpecial said,
October 30, 2006 at 19:46
This reminds me of Steyn’s argument in the Sunday Sun-Times. My favorite quote from that one?
“Too many of us are only good at enjoying freedom.”
As so many rightards keep showing us.
Karatist Preacher said,
October 30, 2006 at 19:56
I’d like to leave a mess on Marie Jon’s doorstep, if you know what I mean.
celticgaryruppertgirl said,
October 30, 2006 at 19:59
Marita: Re Oregon/OSU (Ducks vs. Beavers for those playing at home)
W00t! Hot Damn it’s gonna be great!
I was giggling to myself reading the thread further down about the Trojans. Time was many MANY moons ago I worked at the Oregon Bookstore and on game weekends we always got visiting fans in to buy stuff. Whenever the Trojans came to town we cashiers always did a little homage to them with a nice product display by the register at each counter…Oh how we larfed! (course we mostly threw the packages at each other when the manager wasn’t looking. Ah, youth!)
mikey said,
October 30, 2006 at 19:59
Ok, I actually clicked over an read the damn thing. Jeez, Marie messed on my browser. What a steaming pile. Scary to think she actually believes this stuff. Think I prefer coulter, at least she’s just slinging the crap she knows sells. But I picked this one:
Our president will never cut and run. He will not leave innocent Iraqis to further suffer at the hands of terrorists. The resulting bloodshed (for the citizens of Iraq) would be devastating.
Do you suppose she can even see it? Our president, singularly and individually responsible for the deaths of half a million “innocent Iraqis”, the displacement of a million more, the utter destruction of hope, of quality of life, of education and commerce, the risk of regional war and wider bloodshed. What, the current bloodshed (for the citizens of Iraq) is something less than devastating? It’s what, an inconvenience? A minor unpleasantness? What kind of blinders are you wearing, Marie? There’s a little more than a whiff of jingoistic, xenophobic evil coming off your writing here…
mikey
pablo said,
October 30, 2006 at 20:02
Sorry Worstpresidentever, but most of the people on your list are not elligible for military service because of their drug addictions and arrest records.
Kathy said,
October 30, 2006 at 20:08
Name me ONE war that was “lost at home”. I’d really like to know!
Dr. BDH said,
October 30, 2006 at 20:09
She is a regular columnist for Capitolhillcoffeehouse, The Daley Times Post, RenewAmerica, The Conservative Voice, and Newsbull.
Newsbull? Is that the parent org for all rightwing “news” sites?
ifthethunderdontgetya said,
October 30, 2006 at 20:24
Here’s one, Kathy.
And while I’m being a wiseass, congrats to Saint Louis, you’re NUMBER ONE!!!
Kathy said,
October 30, 2006 at 20:27
Hmm. It took me nearly five seconds to get it. HaHaHa!
ifthethunderdontgetya said,
October 30, 2006 at 20:29
Did I leave that tag open?
OK we need the preview button back. Or some of whatever drugs it was sold to buy.
mikey said,
October 30, 2006 at 20:46
Y’know, I’m intrigued by the management’s complete silence on the preview button issue. Clearly they know what became of said button, and for that matter, why we’re stuck on “Poise, Poise”. But they offer no excuse, no explanation, no apology. It’s like the silence radiating from the white house. To me, it appears they have something to hide. Perhaps the preview button isn’t JUST missing. Could it be buried in a Boston Basement, covered with a layer of quicklime and concrete? Stay tuned for an all new “CSI - Blogistan”….
mikey
Gavin M. said,
October 30, 2006 at 20:59
Um, actually I don’t know what happened to it. It disappeared during some site maintenance awhile ago.
ifthethunderdontgetya said,
October 30, 2006 at 21:02
So we are free to invent conspiracy theories, right Gavin?
Dan Someone said,
October 30, 2006 at 21:15
Preview buttons are “lost at home� because citizens lack the will to stand up and do what is correct. Blame the media and a party that is morally bankrupt and corrupt. “I hate the Previewers and everything they stand for,� the DNC chairman Howard Dean told Democrats gathered at a Manhattan hotel, according to the New York Daily News.
punkinsmom said,
October 30, 2006 at 21:30
Does anyone else see a Marie’ish resemblance here? I’m just sayin’ maybe the fat lips and cheekbones thing is a genetic indicator of wack-o. One on the right and one on the left.
Ole said,
October 30, 2006 at 21:34
Mikey, you mean there’s actually a perweiv bottun to be had for Teh Word Prez … ???
Damn, that’ll be the day … I so do miss it for my own site, and haven’t found anything that even seblmleers it as known in the ol’e an’ ancient Mowable Typo of the freebee dayz.
By the way, you guys as a whole definetely forgot to hit that preview button in 2000 as well as 2004 ;-)
Rary Guppert said,
October 30, 2006 at 21:42
The fact is, the preview button disappeared and everyone complained. How long has it been, however, since anyone’s seen Seb?
Typical liberals. Care more about a preview button than about a human life.
MCH said,
October 30, 2006 at 21:58
Rary, cancel the Pro-Life Blast Fax, pronto! Seb is post-fetal, repeat, Seb is post-fetal!!11!!!!1!
mmm...lemonheads said,
October 30, 2006 at 22:34
“Hey Marie Jon””””, look at the shiny thing!”
Marie, perplexed: “Where’s my wallet?”
Gary Ruppert said,
October 30, 2006 at 23:04
The fact is(tm)…
I have MJ’s anal beads…MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
craigie said,
October 30, 2006 at 23:25
But then she goes out late at night and hangs around the Democratic neighborhoods, hoping to get some hot America-hating action.
R. V. Dump said,
October 30, 2006 at 23:37
Many of our troops have either died or been seriously injured with the knowledge that their efforts have been castigated and underhandedly sabotaged by our own free press. Ironically, it is these same troops that help uphold the rights of the press to help the terrorists.
There you have it! Knowledge maims and kills and therefore must be studiously avoided.
Marq said,
October 31, 2006 at 0:58
mikey–you *saw* teh flaming bag o’ poo on teh stoop, and you just *had* to stomp on it. Now, someone* has stuck the bold tag on. Coincidence? I think *not*! Personally, I blame Howard Dean and Hillary Clinton. And teh gays.
.
*ifthethunderdontgetya… not Dan Someone.
Realist said,
October 31, 2006 at 3:25
“I hate the Republicans and everything they stand for,� the DNC chairman Howard Dean told Democrats
How perfectly awful. I mean, it’s not like conservatives called for his execution or anything, right? Oh, wait . . .
Toof Fat Elvis said,
October 31, 2006 at 6:13
The war in Iraq will be lost at home, just not our home.
Hey, we invaded you first. That’ll teach you not to develop WMDs.
Lesley said,
October 31, 2006 at 7:27
Another Desperate Hausfrau that deserves to be airdropped over Baghdad.
Demogenes Aristophanes said,
October 31, 2006 at 7:51
How bout those quotes at the end of the column:
Quotes:
“Election Day gives us a choice to give our values wings and voice. It’s spending time to pay respect to what makes freedom ring.
“When we neglect our treasured right, we fail to leverage godly might. When we forget or just don’t vote, we leech off liberty.
“Yes, voting is like paying dues. We mark our ballots and we choose. And in the process we invest in funding freedom’s cost.”
— Rev. Greg Asimakoupoulos
Revered Greg, the Dr. Seuss of 501c3 envelope-pushing.
I do not like to sep-er-ate
holy church and father state!
Hey! Yes, you there! On your tush!
Get off that tush and vote for Bush!
Some Guy said,
October 31, 2006 at 13:31
Horrible picture of her. Ugh.
celticgirl said,
October 31, 2006 at 15:46
Some Guy: I agree with you. She was much hotter when she had that whole librarian thing going on.
Now? Not so much…
shargash said,
October 31, 2006 at 18:00
Someone evidently told her to write in simple sentences. Back when she tried using compound sentences, her wingnuttery had kind of a daffy charm. Now she’s scary, like the Stepford Wives meet the Hitler Youth.
Tell Tale Heart said,
October 31, 2006 at 21:18
What idiocy…but damn what a hottie! Why must that vision of HOT be so afflicted by shit-for-brains?
herr doktor bimler said,
October 31, 2006 at 22:46
Why must that vision of HOT be so afflicted by shit-for-brains?
If you really have a thing for serpent necks and prosthetic make-up over the scales, stick to the V miniseries. Could be safer.
Marie Jon' said,
November 4, 2006 at 17:22
It’s Marie
Redardo and I are getting married. I have chosen my lib guy because he is so sweet and he has won my heart. I’m calling him by this week. We are simpatico in the heart. No I do not have lips injected with collagen. I’m French and Italian. I have great looking lips. My face is more sculptured because I’m thinner.
http://www.renewamerica.us/columns/jon/061103