Dec
5

Do You Even Know How to Analogy?




Posted at 21:04 by Cerberus

Joe Nocera, the Motherfucking New York Times:
Obama’s Bay of Pigs

I don’t know why I didn’t do this ages ago. I mean, the New York Times is a distinguished newspaper with a long track record and while their conservative pundits might be embarrassing at best, they are at least trying to look semi-coherent. For those who’ve been seeking shelter from the ever-shrinking tide of Endless Obamacare posts, this seems like a safe harbor.

Now, of course, as I write this, I haven’t done more than look over the title and I haven’t even selected my image for the post yet, but I’m sure that’s not at all a foreboding warning of what’s to come.

So what’s today’s post about anyways?

Shorter:

  • The Obamacare rollout is exactly like the Bay of Pigs invasion. When it’s not worse.

Son of a diseased congressman.

Of course, because apparently blocking Obama from having literally any accomplishment, no matter how small, compromised, or based on old Republican wishlists is literally the only thing conservative money men care about anymore.

Trying in vain to retroactively tarnish the first black president in the hopes that it will wind back the clock and make it so it never happened and prevent it from ever happening again.

Listen, you deluded nutcases. Obama is here to stay and Obamacare is done and passed. And the longer you try and pretend that there is a massive movement of people who are furious that they can’t get ripped off anymore or that an online service on launch day is acting like an online service on launch day, or that major medical programs have a processing time thanks to all your “are you absolutely sure you’re not secretly a rich person” poor person dicking laws are some global evil on par with MechaHitler, the more you guarantee that your bankrupt philosophy will be tossed into the dustbin where the Whigs reside.

Which, on that thought, yes, keep whining about Obamacare. It’s super terrible bad and people will totally agree with you if you just repeat the same talking point another four trillion times.

Oh, and just in case you thought the shorter couldn’t actually be his entire point?

Read it and weep:

So far, at least, the implementation of the Affordable Care Act has been President Obama’s Bay of Pigs. Led to believe that the preparation for Obamacare was on track, Obama was blindsided when that turned out not to be the case. The website where people are supposed to enroll, HealthCare.gov, is a train wreck. People with individual policies saw that they were set to be canceled — and then couldn’t enroll in Obamacare because the website had collapsed. In other cases, people discovered that even the least expensive plan available to them under Obamacare cost more than their old plan. And on and on.

He makes at least a six figure salary to produce work this hacktacular. Meritocracy, bitches!

Also?

Eighteen months after the Bay of Pigs, President Kennedy was confronted with the Cuban missile crisis. Once again, the generals in the Pentagon wanted him to respond militarily, a route that was likely to lead to war with the Soviet Union. But this time, he trusted his own judgment, took a different path and defused the crisis. He had applied the lessons he had learned from the Bay of Pigs to the Cuban missile crisis.

Bay of Pigs : Obamacare :: Cuban Missile Crisis : ?

I’m going with a stuck drawer in the White House filing cabinet.


‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. All Your Obamacare Is Belong to Obamacare. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™

280 Comments »

  1. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 5, 2013 at 21:17

    any accomplishment, no matter how small, compromised, or based on old Republican wishlists is literally the only thing conservative money men care about anymore.

    On the “Republican wishlists” point — there have been some good threads about this recently at LGM, this one being the most relevant.

  2. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 5, 2013 at 21:20

    Oh, and let’s see:

    Bay of Pigs : Obamacare :: Cuban Missile Crisis : BENGHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH(!)ZEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

    Wait, no, that doesn’t work… I have no idea.

  3. Major Kong said,

    December 5, 2013 at 21:26

    Alex, I’ll take “Incredibly bad analogies” for $500.

  4. Pupienus said,

    December 5, 2013 at 21:35

    Joe, lissen up here: Not only did you make the worst analogy EVAH you used incorrect and misleading information to do so.

    The website where people are supposed to enroll, HealthCare.gov, is a train wreck

    Report: HealthCare.gov Enrollment Continues To Accelerate

    People with individual policies saw that they were set to be canceled by the insurance companies.

    A few People discovered that even the least expensive plan available to them under Obamacare cost more than their old plan. Many more people have gotten better coverage for less.

    And on and on.

    Yeah, you do go on and on with the bullshit, Joe.

  5. Pupienus said,

    December 5, 2013 at 21:38

    Readying for Snowpocalypse 2013 OBS?

  6. Pupienus said,

    December 5, 2013 at 21:40

    Bill Clinton’s PENIS.

  7. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 5, 2013 at 22:02

    Health-care related blogwhore in tribute to a dead friend and her mate: http://houseofsubstance.blogspot.com/2013/12/a-repost.html

  8. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 5, 2013 at 22:05

    Readying for Snowpocalypse 2013 OBS?

    I always have beer, so I’m always ready for Snowpocalypse. How ’bout you? You’ll probably have a good view of the inevitable traffic carnage, huh?

  9. tsam said,

    December 5, 2013 at 22:17

    OBUMMER WENT ALL HIROSHIMA ON THE HEARTLAND REAL AMERCIANS.

    That’s how you do a hyper-hyperbolic analogy, bro. Get your head in the game.

  10. johnnyfog said,

    December 5, 2013 at 22:32

    I’ve been guilty of comparing Obama to JFK, too. Both had a big mandate, which they weaseled out of by claiming the conservatives kept blocking them (bullshit), they pussy-footed around for their first terms, and seemed content to rest on their laurels once elected. (JFK vindicated his Irish tribe and kept the seat warm for Bobby, Obama ran the bases for the next black contender) Beyond that, neither had a plan for what came next. They both had issues with inexperience, too: Jack was scared shitless by that old fox Khrushchev; Obama is easily muscled around by Netanyahu.

  11. Pupienus said,

    December 5, 2013 at 22:37

    You’ll probably have a good view of the inevitable traffic carnage, huh?

    Camera is ready.

  12. Pupienus said,

    December 5, 2013 at 22:42

    But it can’t possibly be as good as this epic scene. That’s me and Vasco on the right at the ten second mark.

  13. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 5, 2013 at 22:47

    That was awesome. It’s like the car is stolen and they just don’t give a shit.

  14. tsam said,

    December 5, 2013 at 23:19

    That could have been a clip from The Simpsons.

  15. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 5, 2013 at 23:22

    But it can’t possibly be as good as this epic scene

    Oh man, I remember seeing that at the time! I especially like the subie wagon “Meh, I got this… OHSHITOHSHITOHSHITICANTSTOPWTFBBQ!”

  16. El Manquécito said,

    December 5, 2013 at 23:22

    Magnificent.

  17. El Manquécito said,

    December 5, 2013 at 23:39

    It is particularly pleasant to watch ice storm vids on an 80F degree day.

  18. Suezboo said,

    December 6, 2013 at 0:13

    Aw, man, Madiba just died. We’ve been expecting it and he was 95 after all. But he was probly the only politician I ever really loved. The whole country will be in mourning tomorrow but it is also a personal sadness for a lot of people, like me. So yeah, grieving.

  19. VCarlson said,

    December 6, 2013 at 0:21

    Aw, man, Madiba just died.

    So sorry for your/our loss. It won’t be just SA mourning him.

  20. El Manquécito said,

    December 6, 2013 at 0:25

    He had a good run.

  21. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 6, 2013 at 0:26

    So sorry for your/our loss. It won’t be just SA mourning him.

    Seconded. The world lost a great man.

  22. Smut Clyde said,

    December 6, 2013 at 0:35

    Thrid.

  23. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 6, 2013 at 0:40

    Eighteen months after the Bay of Pigs, President Kennedy was confronted with the Cuban missile crisis. Once again, the generals in the Pentagon wanted him to respond militarily, a route that was likely to lead to war with the Soviet Union. But this time, he trusted his own judgment, took a different path and defused the crisis. He had applied the lessons he had learned from the Bay of Pigs to the Cuban missile crisis.

    As President Obama tries to turn Obamacare around, that is the looming question: Can he learn?

    To what? Operate a server?

  24. El Manquécito said,

    December 6, 2013 at 1:01

    Good thing those generals gave up dispensing bad advice.

  25. herr doktor bimler said,

    December 6, 2013 at 1:08

    He had applied the lessons he had learned from the Bay of Pigs

    This explains why the US stayed out of the Vietnam quagmire.

  26. Smut Clyde said,

    December 6, 2013 at 1:46

    It is as if brain-scan researchers are trying deliberately to piss off Cerberus.

  27. Failure Artist said,

    December 6, 2013 at 1:51

    I told my Ethopian roommate about Mandela’s death and she was non-plussed. I expected more of a response, but then again, she isn’t even close to South African. (but on the other hand, I’m a white American and I cared)

  28. tsam said,

    December 6, 2013 at 1:55

    He had applied the lessons he had learned from the Bay of Pigs to the Cuban missile crisis.

    Since those two things were such similar lessons, it’s GOOD DAMN THING.

  29. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 6, 2013 at 1:57

    He had his problems, but JFK knew how to supervise web designers.

  30. Fenwick said,

    December 6, 2013 at 2:02

    Pup: I stll remember that epic vid from the first time. It has lost none of its lulz six years later.

    Suezboo: He was beloved around the world and inspired people everywhere. I especially loved his smile.: Instead of bitterness and anger, he embodied reconciliation and looking to the future. A great man with endurance in prison … and now endurance in the world’s memory.

    Dennis: The moritorium is a decent act … in keeping with the spirit of the man. Sadlyburg–well me at least–thanks you.

  31. tsam said,

    December 6, 2013 at 2:24

    But he was probly the only politician I ever really loved.

    He was one of the very few in history that earned it.

  32. Suezboo said,

    December 6, 2013 at 2:24

    Yes, I agree the whole world should be mourning – I am/we are grateful for the empathy.
    He was almost the last of our Founding Fathers – only one still ticking over is the Arch – Archbishop Desmond Tutu.
    Dennis : That is a nice thing to do. Appreciated.

  33. Major Kong said,

    December 6, 2013 at 2:34

    I’m truly amazed he lived to be 95 years old after the way he was treated in prison. He was made of tough stuff.

  34. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 6, 2013 at 2:51

    Hmm, did my only arrest involve being hauled off for trying to get certain investments out of South Africa? Why yes I believe it was, and I’ve gotten away with everything else.

  35. tsam said,

    December 6, 2013 at 3:29

    Presidential vetoes don’t get overridden often in the US, but when Reagan vetoed sanctions against South Africa, congress stepped up and got the job done.

    That felt really strange to say–Congress doing something.

  36. Bitter Scribe said,

    December 6, 2013 at 5:09

    Reagan called Mandela a terrorist and furnished arms to the Contras.

    Fuck him with a rusty chainsaw.

  37. Fenwick said,

    December 6, 2013 at 6:14

    Good for you, Sub! (Fwiw, Hampshire was the first US college / university to disinvest. In 1977. Buncha libruls.)

    tsam: I was ecstatic when the override happened. A rare bright moment in the Reagan years.

    Scribe: Cheney, too. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/12/05/dick-cheney-nelson-mandela-terrorist_n_4394071.html?utm_hp_ref=politics

  38. bughunter said,

    December 6, 2013 at 6:19

    The only time I’ve ever been arrested was in 1987, protesting my college’s (the University of Colorado’s) investment in companies with large holdings in apartheid South Africa.

    Not that that was the only illegal thing I’ve ever done, but the only time I was arrested… and in fact, I don’t think staging a “die in” in the CU Admin building was truly illegal, just annoying. (Intentionally so, I admit.)

    Oh, and one of the protest signs I created for the event made the front page of the Denver Post, and was labeled “Orwellian.” It had a crudely drawn picture of a dark-skinned leg and foot, and an unshackled ball and chain, with the slogan “Slavery is Cheap; Freedom is Priceless.”

    Really? Orwellian?

    Fuck you, Denver Post.

    Anyway, the whole protest campaign, which included some rather large marches on campus in Boulder that brought out armored police and tear gas, ended with the “cool kids” of the protest storming the conference table at a Regents’ meeting, decimating any chance of negotiating with them. I learned a few lessons there.

    1) The press *always* gets key facts wrong in any story, no matter how simple the story is. And very few people realize this.

    2) The most charismatic person in a rebellious group is likely a government plant. It was this time… the guy graduated and went to work for the FBI.

    3) Most of the “cool kids” weren’t in it for any principles, unless you count politicking and social ladder climbing as principles. I’m convinced this applies to most everybody practicing and covering politics from PTAs and school boards up to the US Congress and White House.

    4) “Hippie chicks” dig men who are passionate about causes. To this day, I have an uncommon appreciation for female axillary hair.

    Mandela, your devotion and vision made the world a better place, with the epicenter in the country you love, by freeing your own people. I can’t imagine a more beatific legacy than that. You’ve earned a preeminent place in history many times over. Bob bless you.

  39. bughunter said,

    December 6, 2013 at 8:08

    Bill Clinton’s PENIS.

    Looks to me like he drew more assholes* than penises.

    Vonnegutian assholes, notably.

    I can see the leader of the free world sitting in a meeting, wishing he could use the word, but can’t. Instead, he doodles the symbol…

    Wonder who the asshole[s] [was|were]…

  40. Gary Ruppert said,

    December 6, 2013 at 15:40

    The fact is, Obamacare is teh worls worst diasster worse than Hitler and even Benghazi, Fast and Furious, IRS Targeting Conservatives Scandal and his creation of the NSA to spy on patriots.

  41. Liberal Toady said,

    December 6, 2013 at 15:52

    Read the whole thing, folks.

  42. Some Prestonian Evening said,

    December 6, 2013 at 16:55

    What a strange comment!
    .

  43. The Dark God of Time, AKA DA® said,

    December 6, 2013 at 17:22

    Not as strange as this one, Jeff:

    O’Reilly had opened the conversation by saying that, though Mandela was a “communist,” he was still “a great man. What he did for his people was stunning,” continuing that he was still able to respect him despite their different political views. O’Reilly then asked Santorum why the Republican Party wasn’t able to resolve its ideological differences with the same respect.

    “Nelson Mandela stood up against a great injustice and was willing to pay a huge price for that, and that’s the reason he’s mourned today,” Santorum said. “But you’re right, what he was advocating for wasn’t necessarily the right answer.”

    He then compared Mandela’s decades-long struggle against apartheid with the Republican effort to stop Obamacare

    http://talkingpointsmemo.com/livewire/rick-santorum-nelson-mandela-obamacare-apartheid

  44. tsam said,

    December 6, 2013 at 17:38

    By the way–despite being a preening, ostensibly pretentious weirdo, we DO have Bono to thank for raising awareness about the issue worldwide and playing a role in ending apartheid.

    I know he raised my awareness of the issue and got me on the right side of history.

  45. tsam said,

    December 6, 2013 at 17:41

    Since when is doing something about poverty communism?

    Obamacare = apartheid in terms of the struggle because a ton of repigs have died in all the armed conflict (which is not to say that more than a few of them aren’t willing to go there), amirite?

    Conclusion: Santorum, go to hell and die, k?

  46. VCarlson said,

    December 6, 2013 at 17:57

    Obamacare = apartheid in terms of the struggle because a ton of repigs have died in all the armed conflict (which is not to say that more than a few of them aren’t willing to go there), amirite?

    I assume you’re referring to the “armed conflict” part, not the “die” part, since Santorum and his ilk seem to be quite happy with the idea of other people dying.

  47. tsam said,

    December 6, 2013 at 18:27

    Santorum and his ilk seem to be quite happy with the idea of other people dying.

    Yes, but he and Obama are similar chickenhawk snatchfaceassholes.

  48. bbkf said,

    December 6, 2013 at 18:28

    how do the fox news studios contain all of bill’s goodness and ego?! i’m sure mandela would be just overjoyed to hear that bill still ‘respected’ him even though he was a ‘communist’…i’m sure the decades in jail were worth knowing that bill respects him…even tho…

    magnanimity, thy name is bill o’reilly…what an a-hole…

  49. Pupienus Maximus said,

    December 6, 2013 at 18:34

    Is Rick “Frothy Mix” Santorum taking lessons from Joe Nocera? I recall America’s Dumbest Homosexual™ once likened the struggle of the conservatives to the struggle of Jews in pre-war Germany. Perhaps they really, deep down, feel so oppressed. Fucking loons – put them all up against the wall then let Dog sort it out.

  50. bbkf said,

    December 6, 2013 at 18:41

    likened the struggle of the conservatives to the struggle of Jews in pre-war Germany. Perhaps they really, deep down, feel so oppressed.

    i get so confused by them because i thought conservatives were NEVER oppressed or victims…it’s always just the liberals who continually play the victim/oppression card? it’s almost like you can’t believe anything they say!

  51. Major Kong said,

    December 6, 2013 at 19:02

    it’s almost like you can’t believe anything they say!

    It took you this long to figure that out?

  52. bbkf said,

    December 6, 2013 at 19:03

    It took you this long to figure that out?

    i’ve never claimed to be a quick-study…

  53. tsam said,

    December 6, 2013 at 19:25

    Well I guess this means we can lock up anti-ACA Republicans for 27 years?

  54. bbkf said,

    December 6, 2013 at 19:36

    Well I guess this means we can lock up anti-ACA Republicans for 27 years?

    their reactions to that would be highly amusing…they certainly wouldn’t show mandela’s dignity…

  55. tsam said,

    December 6, 2013 at 19:36

    it’s almost like you can’t believe anything they say!

    Nope. I’m still holding on to the hope that they aren’t all disingenuous martyrs. I don’t know why, maybe it’s cuz im dum

  56. tsam said,

    December 6, 2013 at 19:37

    their reactions to that would be highly amusing…they certainly wouldn’t show mandela’s dignity…

    I figure we have to lock up Santorum so he won’t be embarrassed by his incredibly insane analogy. I mean, what good is a persecution complex if you don’t have a real reason to have one?

  57. Fenwick said,

    December 6, 2013 at 19:42

    bug: Good for you! Your conclusions seem dead-center to me, btw.

  58. Smarter Than Your Average Bear said,

    December 6, 2013 at 20:08

    Since when is doing something about poverty communism?

    At least since Tailgunner Joe. The Ruling Class (aside: terribly funny movie starring Peter O’Toole btw) needs their starving, ill, peons desperate to work at any wage to feed their families. Any attempt to overcome that state must be met with full force.

  59. tsam said,

    December 6, 2013 at 20:21

    hee hee

    Tailgunner.

  60. jim the heretical anti-cliff lemming said,

    December 6, 2013 at 20:49

    ObamaCare is a bold surprise attack against totalitarianism that’s being systematically FUBARed by the usual cast of inept arse-clamped fuckwits?

    AFAF.

    Tell you what, Yanks: solemnly promise you’ll steal our chartered banking system from Eh to Zed (& promise you’ll be very very careful not to break it) & we’ll let you have the blueprints to our fucking national Medicare system at absolutely NO! EXTRA! CO$T!!!!!

    That’s a double-double we can believe in, my neighbours.

  61. Fenwick said,

    December 6, 2013 at 21:02

    jim: Sounds good! But will you throw in some steak knives?

  62. Fenwick said,

    December 6, 2013 at 21:06

    Or a least some stakes? We have many zombies in our legislative branch. For that matter, can you ship us your entire governmental system, so we can replace this idiotic Rube Goldberg nonsense with rational government?

  63. Major Kong said,

    December 6, 2013 at 21:13

    Throw in a couple pounds of pea-meal bacon while you’re at it. I miss my Toronto pea-meal bacon sandwiches.

  64. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 6, 2013 at 21:15

    Readying for Snowpocalypse 2013 OBS?

    Snowpocalypse 2013 update: It’s 25 degrees and there are six to seven inches (obligatory “that’s what he said”) on the ground and everybody is completely losing their shit. It’s hilarious, and very, very pretty. We don’t get this kinda thing very often.

    Although I’m not looking forward to the projected 8F temperatures that are s’posed to follow this weekend. WTF nature? This isn’t the midwest!

    Did you get any snow up north in Portlandia, Pupienus? Any traffic hilarity to report?

  65. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 6, 2013 at 21:16

    Tell you what, Yanks: solemnly promise you’ll steal our chartered banking system from Eh to Zed (& promise you’ll be very very careful not to break it) & we’ll let you have the blueprints to our fucking national Medicare system at absolutely NO! EXTRA! CO$T!!!!!

    The banking thing is mysterious. How is it that they rake in guillotine-worthy profits and yet they haven’t tried to destroy Canada? (Helping America destroy itself, through banking subsidiaries and Nickelback, is a Canadian mission.)

  66. Gary Ruppert said,

    December 6, 2013 at 21:18

    The fact is, America has the greatest form of government ever conceived by the mind of man inspired by our God. The Declaration of Independence and our Consitiution guarantee freedom and we invented the free market system which is ecomonic liberty. But you lie-berals cntinously run tdown the greatest government in the world,m the United Snakes of America!

  67. Major Kong said,

    December 6, 2013 at 21:19

    Glad I’m not on the schedule this weekend. Both Memphis and Indy are getting hit with freezing rain. Wrench, meet works.

  68. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 6, 2013 at 21:20

    Notwithstanding what Bourdain’s LEAF SUCK Layover, peameal sammies aren’t what Hogtown is aboot. Plain peameal onna kaiser with nothing on it has really only come back because of that show. Not that we don’t eat a lotta peameal here – we most certainly do – but calling it lEAFS SUCK “iconic sandwich” is pretty fake.

    The true iconic sandwich of LEAFS SUCK is getting black-out drunk – smoking some crack – and then getting black-out drunk some more.

  69. Major Kong said,

    December 6, 2013 at 21:22

    The true iconic sandwich of LEAFS SUCK is getting black-out drunk – smoking some crack – and then getting black-out drunk some more.

    Rob Ford, is that you?

  70. tsam said,

    December 6, 2013 at 21:23

    It’s already 8° here in Spokane, but only a dusting of snow. You guys keep that snow, k?

  71. Major Kong said,

    December 6, 2013 at 21:24

    Every day for lunch I’d walk down to the St. Lawrence Market and get one of those sandwiches with hot peppers and spicy mustard.

    Iconic or not I thought they were pretty damn good. And that was even before Bourdain had them on his show.

  72. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 6, 2013 at 21:24

    I want the fucking snow already. BRING IT!

  73. El Manquécito said,

    December 6, 2013 at 21:33

    80 with balmy zephyrs here in teh Okefenokee.

  74. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 6, 2013 at 21:35

    It’s already 8° here in Spokane, but only a dusting of snow. You guys keep that snow, k?

    Yeah, I don’t think we have much choice. Not s’posed to get above freezing for a while.

  75. Major Kong said,

    December 6, 2013 at 21:37

    We’re supposed to get 4 inches of snow today. Since it’s the first real snow of the season it’ll be Snowmageddon!

    By February nobody will give it a second thought.

  76. Pupienus said,

    December 6, 2013 at 21:40

    We got barely enough to coat the ground here in PDX. Which, being Portland, was enough to freak everyone the fuck out and bring every freeway to a standstill. Also something about a witch’s tit.

  77. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 6, 2013 at 21:40

    St. Lawrence South Market is pretty sweet. There, you can get the best perogies available in LEAFS SUCK outside of Roncy/Parkdale.

  78. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 6, 2013 at 21:42

    We get nothing until maybe Tuesday.

    Annoying.

  79. Fenwick said,

    December 6, 2013 at 21:44

    Oh, noes! I hope the crappy Oregon weather doesn’t prevent air travel! My geology professor brother and his wife are flying from Eugene–very near OBS’s in Corvallis–to KC for a Sunday memorial service for Dad, who died two weeks ago. My other brother and I are flying from Albuquerque tomorrow. (Actually we are his step-kids.) Our KC sisters were with him at the end.

    He was 94. His death was a blessing in a way; he had Alzeiheimer’s and was spiralling down very rapidly; he was very, very frail physically. I think he was ready to leave; he refused food toward the end. Mercifully his end was peaceful: He went to sleep and never woke up.

    I hope I die in a similar fashion; I am blessed with a wonderful and vivid dream life. I would like to die under the sky somewhere. I have sworn to myself that I will NOT die in a hospital.

    Geez, I need to lighten up. Us old geezers think about death sometimes, specially old geezers with depression. S,N snark is an excellent antidote!

  80. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 6, 2013 at 21:51

    Mmmmm. South Market perogies…

    It’s a bit of a nightmare down there right now. Union Station construction has borked up a pretty huge chunk of downtown.

  81. Fenwick said,

    December 6, 2013 at 21:52

    ABQ had a coupla inches two days ago., Wasn’t bad except for the frigid, windy weather. It was c-o-l-d until the storm moved off! But my brother and I will catch up with it again: It’s due to hit KC about the time we land.

    bbkf prolly laughs her head off when we complain about snow and cold, or try to impress one another with how bad our Snowmeggon is!

  82. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 6, 2013 at 21:57

    That plus I’m totes a suburbanite now. My sandwich touchstones are the shawarma at Shirin Kebab House, Falafel at Chef’s Door and Heroes at the Quarry Diner. Broadview and Gerrard still has the best Banh Mi though.

  83. Smarter Than Your Average Bear said,

    December 6, 2013 at 21:59

    The true iconic sandwich of LEAFS SUCK is getting black-out drunk – smoking some crack – and then getting black-out drunk some more.

    Indeed a Rob Ford special. I’m glad you call it peameal though because those of out west know that ain’t really bacon no matter what you folks back east think, it’s just tarted up ham :)

  84. tigris said,

    December 6, 2013 at 22:02

    86 degrees, feels like 94, or so they say because it doesn’t.

  85. Major Kong said,

    December 6, 2013 at 22:35

    Where are you that it’s 86 degrees? I’m guessing it’s not in the lower 48 United States.

  86. VCarlson said,

    December 6, 2013 at 22:38

    77, expected to get to 81, later. No snow expected, of course.

  87. tigris said,

    December 6, 2013 at 22:40

    I’m living in the tropics, Major. It’s lovely but the XC skiing is crap.

  88. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 6, 2013 at 22:52

    Just a quick note about White Bronco – all of the juicy wiretap info that we’re getting is because it was all included as supporting documentation to get warrants for Project Brazen 2. That process is called “Information to Obtain” and is actually referred to as ITO.

    I don’t know how a glove is going to fit (or not fit) into this drama, but I am totally expecting one any day now.

  89. El Manquécito said,

    December 6, 2013 at 22:52

    Really hard to grow great lettuce too.

  90. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 6, 2013 at 22:58

    I don’t know how a glove is going to fit (or not fit) into this drama, but I am totally expecting one any day now.

    If it’s one white glove it’ll be the BEST SCANDAL EVER.

  91. bbkf said,

    December 6, 2013 at 23:00

    We get nothing until maybe Tuesday.

    Annoying.

    we were on STORM WATCH!!! earlier this week and didn’t get much…school got out early, but that was about it…now, THAT’S annoying…i LOVE snow days and will go home early/not come in at the drop of a snowflake…cleon can kiss my ass…

    bbkf prolly laughs her head off when we complain about snow and cold, or try to impress one another with how bad our Snowmeggon is!

    ha! yes…right now we are at a balmy 0 degrees (but it feels like -17!!!) and tonight’s low is projected to be -15, so with the wind, it will be about eleventybillion below* or something…thank dog that hubbkf is finally beginning to not enjoy freezing his nuts off…i keep speculating on which warm weather climate i would like to live in…

    *i heard on the weather channel or it could have been one of my bar patrons talking about someplace/some year that was hellaciously cold…at one point, the actual temp was -56 below…that did not include the wind chill index…that’s just fucked up…

  92. bbkf said,

    December 6, 2013 at 23:02

    If it’s one white glove it’ll be the BEST SCANDAL EVER.

    the hamburger helper guy?

    I don’t know how a glove is going to fit (or not fit) into this drama, but I am totally expecting one any day now.

    dude’s gotta keep his crack somewhere and maybe he didn’t have a balloon handy…rubber glove = next best thing!

  93. tigris said,

    December 6, 2013 at 23:04

    I brought seeds for mignonette and celtuce. We’ll see!

  94. El Manquécito said,

    December 6, 2013 at 23:06

    Try anuenue; best hot weather lettuce there is.

  95. tigris said,

    December 6, 2013 at 23:12

    Thanks, I’ll order some seed before my next trip up and sneak them back. NOT REALLY, GOVERNMENT! But yeah, really.

  96. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 6, 2013 at 23:15

    It’s nut-picking weather.

    Mandela through his words showed the world what he was….a revolutionary Marxist. If Breitbart is going to continue to cut and paste this drivel then you may as well start singing the praises of Obama as well.

  97. bbkf said,

    December 6, 2013 at 23:19

    I’m living in the tropics, Major. It’s lovely but the XC skiing is crap.

    guest room?

  98. tigris said,

    December 6, 2013 at 23:24

    Indeed! Bring your snorkel gear!

  99. bbkf said,

    December 6, 2013 at 23:26

    Indeed! Bring your snorkel gear!

    hey, now! i only snorkel with hubbkf…oh…wait…

  100. bbkf said,

    December 6, 2013 at 23:29

    It’s nut-picking weather.

    indeed, but i found the first part of the comment ever so intriguing:

    Perhaps but what did the end of the Apartheid regime bring SA? Blacks have a higher unemployment rate now than they had under Apartheid. SA is now the rape capitol of the world and has one of the highest rates of AIDS infection.
    Mandela through his words showed the world what he was….a revolutionary Marxist.

    hey, at least the blacks had jobs and weren’t raping the white wimmen…amirite? where have we heard that noxious shit before?

  101. tsam said,

    December 6, 2013 at 23:30

    XC skiing is crap.

    It’s crap everywhere, not just the tropics.

  102. tsam said,

    December 6, 2013 at 23:32

    It’s nut-picking weather.

    HOLY FUCKING SHIT

  103. tsam said,

    December 6, 2013 at 23:34

    Totally unironicle and junk, but the comment that follows:

    idiotxx > dwok

    hear hear.

  104. Pupienus said,

    December 6, 2013 at 23:39

    Should I bring my scuba equipment? Cuz, if so, I’m like totally there.

  105. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 6, 2013 at 23:42

    I just measured 7.5 inches* at home and it’s still coming.**

    *What?
    **down.

  106. Pupienus said,

    December 6, 2013 at 23:42

    The inmates are now fully in charge of the asylum. From “V the K” (is that one of the most absurd nyms EVAH?) at GayPutzRiot:

    The Communist Mayor of New York City owns two homes valued at over a million dollars apiece. The New York Times considers his two million-dollar homes “humble.” And to my knowledge, he has not offered to take in any of the city’s homeless.

    If Democrats can ask why I “need” an AR-15, is it fair to ask why Comrade DeBlasio needs two homes?

    BTW: The Communist Senator from Massachusetts won’t be running for president in 2016. Sad really. Don’t you think it’s time a fake Native American occupied the White House? (I remind you, a “moderate, electable” Republican lost to this shrill Marxist lying harridan. Perhaps previewing what will happen if Chris Christie runs against Hillary.)

  107. bbkf said,

    December 6, 2013 at 23:42

    Should I bring my scuba equipment? Cuz, if so, I’m like totally there.

    I ALREADY HAVE DIBS ON THE GUEST ROOM MISTER!

  108. tigris said,

    December 6, 2013 at 23:43

    Mandela through his words showed the world what he was….a revolutionary Marxist.

    Not exactly true: his words.

  109. tigris said,

    December 6, 2013 at 23:45

    The diving is supposed to be pretty good.

    Oh, B, you guys can all fit, it’s a big bed!

  110. Pupienus said,

    December 6, 2013 at 23:46

    I went there to see what they had to say about Madiba but unsurprisingly they don’t seem to care.

  111. bbkf said,

    December 6, 2013 at 23:50

    From “V the K”

    my mango hunting has led me to believe that this ‘v the k’ thing is perhaps the most odious, inhuman, icky, pukey, egotistical jackwad* of all time…

    *i really wanted to call it a cocksucker, but didn’t want to insult cocksuckers in general…

  112. bbkf said,

    December 6, 2013 at 23:50

    Oh, B, you guys can all fit, it’s a big bed!

    ooooh! pillow fight!

  113. Major Kong said,

    December 6, 2013 at 23:54

    perhaps the most odious, inhuman, icky, pukey, egotistical jackwad* of all time

    I don’t know. There’s an awful lot of competition for that title.

  114. tsam said,

    December 7, 2013 at 0:02

    There’s an awful lot of competition for that title.

    No shit. Even the Biebs is in the hunt on this one. Also Kanye, his wife Kum, etc…

  115. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 7, 2013 at 0:03

    ooooh! pillow fight!

    I have a secret stash of pillows. You’ll never guess where!

  116. Pupienus said,

    December 7, 2013 at 0:03

    I don’t know. There’s an awful lot of competition for that title.

    Most of the competition are regulars at that site.

  117. bbkf said,

    December 7, 2013 at 0:09

    I have a secret stash of pillows. You’ll never guess where!

    THOSE AREN’T PILLOWS!

  118. bbkf said,

    December 7, 2013 at 0:10

    Most of the competition are regulars at that site

    they are awfully oogy over there…sad what self-hatred does to a person…

  119. tsam said,

    December 7, 2013 at 0:22

    I have a secret stash of pillows. You’ll never guess where!

    Fancy a cup of tea?

  120. tigris said,

    December 7, 2013 at 0:38

    I have a secret stash of pillows. You’ll never guess where!

    I might not, but I have infinite monkeys making infinite guesses.

  121. Smut Clyde said,

    December 7, 2013 at 0:44

    I have a secret stash of pillows. You’ll never guess where!

    They’re in the area around Tikrit and Baghdad and east, west, south and north somewhat.

  122. SychoFANtic Fans of Dr BLT said,

    December 7, 2013 at 0:58

    Sometimes it’s just better to say that something totally sucks, rather than to have to come up with a lame analogy.

  123. Smarter Than Your Average Bear said,

    December 7, 2013 at 1:15

    Dragon-King

    Dragon-King Wangchuck – at least someone other tha the crack dealers is making money off of Ford :)

    http://www.vice.com/en_ca/read/inside-the-satanic-rob-ford-bus-tours

  124. Smarter Than Your Average Bear said,

    December 7, 2013 at 1:17

    I have a secret stash of pillows. You’ll never guess where!

    Um – where gerbils are rumoured to be found?

  125. Pupienus Maximus said,

    December 7, 2013 at 1:19

    Dr. BLT really sucks even though he enabled me to avoid laboring at analogies.

  126. Not Dr BLT said,

    December 7, 2013 at 1:25

    Vampires suck too, but who doesn’t love a great vampire flic? Vacuum cleaners suck, but we all need them.

  127. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 7, 2013 at 1:40

    Vampires suck too, but who doesn’t love a great vampire flic?

    Victims of vampires, you heartless bastard.

  128. Not Dr BLT said,

    December 7, 2013 at 2:15

    I was just asking.

  129. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 7, 2013 at 2:59

    at least someone other tha the crack dealers is making money off of Ford

    Are you kidding? Loads of folks are making payola offa White Bronco. City’s budget is pushing 11 figures and Ford ran on a platform of changing up everythings in the budget, sometimes with privatization and sometimes with consultants who will suggest privatization. The first couple years was totes loot-a-palooza.

  130. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 7, 2013 at 3:02

    Sorry about that. Didn’t mean to be so negative. What I really meant was Hail Satan!

  131. Fenwick said,

    December 7, 2013 at 4:38

    The first time I ever heard of the White Bronco was when D-KW was going ballistic over Leafs Suck mass transportation plans a few years back. Ford is turning into an epic buffoon character.

    How did he get elected? What is his political base? Is it a free base?

  132. Gary Ruppert said,

    December 7, 2013 at 4:53

    The fact is, mandela was a Communist Socialist Fabian Marxist African and hated the USA, yet we are forced to lower are flag by his grandson.

    When will real americans rise up and take there country back?

    by the way, Rob Ford brought freedom and fiscal restraint to liberal biased Toronto and all the brew-ha-ha is brought by fabian Marxists Social USA haters in the media. The Real People of Toronot, the productive class not the taker artists and street people downtown, voted and hed win again if election is tomorrow. Liberals always try to ram things down are throtes and have no respect for the rule of law

  133. tigris said,

    December 7, 2013 at 5:13

    Fabian was fun in North to Alaska. Didn’t know he hated the USA!

  134. Pupienus said,

    December 7, 2013 at 5:14

    Of possible interest to locals, Georgia O’Queef, meet Slutvomit: The year in band names 2013.

  135. Fenwick said,

    December 7, 2013 at 5:49

    That wuz fun, Pup!

  136. Major Kong said,

    December 7, 2013 at 13:12

    Interesting post about “Real Americans”

    Real Americans

    Here’s an excerpt:

    Has your state ever committed treason in defense of slavery, declaring war on the United States of America and firing on American soldiers fighting under the American flag? If so, please recite the Pledge of Allegiance — not as a loyalty oath, but just as an opportunity to reacquaint yourself with the words. Especially the last six. (The Pledge of Allegiance, by the way, was written by a New Yorker.)

  137. acrannymint said,

    December 7, 2013 at 18:44

    Disclaimer- I work at CMS so I’m biased. ACA is more than healthcare.gov which admittedly had way too many issues. A number of these provisions have been in place for almost 2 years to little fanfare.

  138. acrannymint said,

    December 7, 2013 at 19:12

    O’Reilly had opened the conversation by saying that, though Mandela was a “communist,”. O’Reilly didn’t get the memo that he was actually a terrorist.

    The Ruling Class
    everybody is completely losing their shit Fenwick can confirm – the refrain in Merlin is “Bread, Milk, and Toilet Paper”

  139. acrannymint said,

    December 7, 2013 at 19:15

    i LOVE snow days I have one wish each year and that is to wake up look out the window and know I can go back to bed

  140. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 7, 2013 at 20:15

    It’s a nice feeling. Since weather has gone crazy and we are getting big snowstorms more often work is less forgiving about snow days. Jerks.

  141. acrannymint said,

    December 7, 2013 at 21:04

    When I worked near DC there was a bigger picture to consider namely how to deal with the sheer volume of Federal workers and the impacts on the roads and public transportation. Operations tended to err on the side of safety for the workers and close down. I now work near Baltimore and the criteria is whether they can get the parking lot plowed. There are quite a few people that live in PA or in more western MD counties that this needlessly puts at risk. I happen to live about 5 miles from work (and that is what say to myself when things get crazy) so it isn’t always a big deal.

  142. Wingnut Dictionary said,

    December 7, 2013 at 21:18

    Analogy:

    From the root words anal and ogy, an analogy is something you pulled out of your ass that, once posted on your website, will elicit an “oh God, yeah!” or ogy response from the rubes your readers.

  143. Thread Bear said,

    December 7, 2013 at 22:48

    See if you can tell which one is Dragon-King Wangchuck in this video:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u8GCH5qf9IY

  144. Pupienus Maximus said,

    December 7, 2013 at 23:59

    WOOHOO! Fogo de Chao is finally opening a restaurant in
    Portland. I fell in fucking love with the one in Sao Paolo but I never go to Sao Paolo anymore. Nor to any of the US cities that have one. Sooooooo excited!

  145. The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge said,

    December 8, 2013 at 3:27

    I’ve been offline for a couple of days, so this is belated, but to Suezboo and any other South Africans who post or lurk—my condolences on the loss of President Mandela. (Are your presidents addressed that way for life, like ours? Well, if anybody deserves it….)

    I can’t help but think the reaction from the RWNM might shock a few fencesitters into realizing what morally bankrupt assholes they are. Particularly their attempts to brand him with the “terrorist” label when all of them were such vocal supporters of Menachem Begin! (Well, Reagan was a RINO—I suppose Begin was a LINO by now.)

  146. Major Kong said,

    December 8, 2013 at 4:13

    Fogo de Chao is finally opening a restaurant in
    Portland

    Is that one of those “death by meat” Brazilian restaurants?

  147. Pupienus Maximus said,

    December 8, 2013 at 4:16

    Coach Urban Meyer – the real one – looks worried. Good. Go Spartans!

  148. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 8, 2013 at 4:58

    Speaking of, Leafs are going to overtime vs. the Sens in about 50 seconds.

  149. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 8, 2013 at 5:10

    Ottawa unable to convert overtime 4-on-1. It’s time for a shootout.

  150. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 8, 2013 at 5:19

    Yayyy LEAFS! Giving the fans the suspense they want by giving up a two goal lead in the third. Everyone loves shootout victories!

    Reimer had 47 saves.

  151. Major Kong said,

    December 8, 2013 at 5:25

    Go Ohio State poisonous nuts!

  152. Pupienus Maximus said,

    December 8, 2013 at 6:17

    Go Ohio State poisonous nuts!

    You talking about John Boehner?

  153. Pupienus Maximus said,

    December 8, 2013 at 6:56

    Yesssssss! Suck on it Ohio State. Suck it Urban Meyers.

  154. Austin Loomis said,

    December 8, 2013 at 16:20

    Rev Battleaxe skrev:

    I can’t help but think the reaction from the RWNM might shock a few fencesitters into realizing what morally bankrupt assholes they are.

    Anything’s possible. If you’d asked me, in 2003, whether John Cole would ever come to his senses, I’d have laughed in your face. And I certainly wouldn’t have entertained the idea that Charles Johnson might figure out what sort of star he’d hitched his wagon to. (Or rather, as the hospital porter said to Inspector Grant, I’d have found the idea entertaining all right, but not what you might call plausible.)

  155. address my envelope, lips! said,

    December 8, 2013 at 21:34

    In the Book Shakespeare’s Restless World: A Portrait of an Era in Twenty Objects, 19 of the pieces are from the early to mid 17th century, but the last object is a copy of Shakespeare’s complete works known as “The Robben Island Bible” (Robben Island was the notorious S.A. prison where Mandela and the leaders of the ANC were imprisoned). Sonny Venkatrathnam, a member of the ANC, was allowed only one book during his imprisonment, and he chose Shakespeare, disguising it by pasting Hindu postcards all over it, and pretending it was a religious book. He is quoted:

    “About six months before my due release date, I circulated The Complete Works of Shakespeare and asked my comrades there to select a line or passage that appealed to them and sign it. All of them chose lines or passages that inspired them and strengthened the resolve for the struggle.”

    There’s a photographic image of the page where Mandela marked a passage in Julius Caesar that was most meaningful to him:
    “[Caesar]: Cowards die many times before their deaths:
    The valiant never taste of death but once.
    Of all the wonders that I yet have heard,
    It seems to me most strange that men should fear,
    Seeing that death, a necessary end,
    Will come when it will come.”

    It gave me goosebumps. And brought tears to my eyes. I hadn’t known this story, and I literally read it for the first time a week before Mandela’s death. He was a truly great man, and Bill O’Reilly and all the other Rethugs can suck it.

    (In late weather news, it’s icing down here in delightful Nowhere, VA, and I’ve filled the bird feeder twice already today. The squirrels aren’t getting it (though the raccoons have made off with the suet feeder, which I forgot to take in last night), it’s just birds, birds, birds, snorking up food as fast as they can.)

  156. El Manquécito said,

    December 8, 2013 at 22:43

    There’s a good baseball thread at LGM about Cano and Ellsbury.

  157. kg said,

    December 9, 2013 at 17:08

    Fogo de Chao is finally opening a restaurant in
    Portland

    Is that one of those “death by meat” Brazilian restaurants?

    Yep, they have one in Chicago. Seems odd but they actually have an amazing salad bar!

  158. bbkf said,

    December 9, 2013 at 17:37

    There’s a good baseball thread at LGM about Cano and Ellsbury.

    damn! everybody is ditching for lgm…their comment thread boggles me, so i rarely go…one of these days i’m going to be just a lonely old lady sitting in an empty hottub…

  159. bbkf said,

    December 9, 2013 at 18:06

    at least if i make any bubbles, nobody will know…

  160. Suezboo said,

    December 9, 2013 at 18:12

    This old lady who doesn’t give a shit about baseball will know, bbkf.
    So, watch it, kiddo !

  161. Major Kong said,

    December 9, 2013 at 18:15

    There’s a good baseball thread at LGM about Cano and Ellsbury.

    Not a big fan of baseball. It’s been described as “three minutes of action packed into three hours”.

    That’s why baseball announcers have to sit there and spout statistics at each other all day – because there’s nothing else going on.

  162. El Manquécito said,

    December 9, 2013 at 18:56

    They get a higher class of troll over there, besides the usual that’s everywhere. Not enough snark though and a total absence of TEH BUTTOCKS.

  163. jim the heterodox anti-meteor Megalodon said,

    December 9, 2013 at 20:08

    The banking thing is mysterious. How is it that they rake in guillotine-worthy profits and yet they haven’t tried to destroy Canada?

    Because destroyed goods go for a much lousier price on the market, for starters.
    Also I think that as yet, Canuck plutocrats are more Ferengi than Fundamentalist.

  164. VCarlson said,

    December 9, 2013 at 20:17

    Not a big fan of baseball. It’s been described as “three minutes of action packed into three hours”

    Not a big fan of watching sports, especially on TV. I’ll go to a baseball game voluntarily (but not very often), while the only two American football games I’ve been to were because a) a dorm mate was playing, and the rest of the dorm went to cheer him on (UC Davis was not a big football school – I think the only sports scholarships granted were for horse polo); and b) a HS game in Texas, to which I was dragged by family. Come to think of it, the religion of American football, with its emphasis on head injuries, could explain a lot.

  165. Major Kong said,

    December 9, 2013 at 20:25

    I very seldom watch sports. I have the attention span of a mayfly, which makes it hard for me to sit through an entire sporting event. If I do happen to watch something it will probably be (American) football.

  166. Suezboo said,

    December 9, 2013 at 20:38

    Major, try being forced to watch a cricket match (one game=5 days). My brother played both cricket and rugby in HS, so I have been forced to sit through both. At least I know the rules and can understand what is going on which is definitely not the case in US football or baseball. In fact, I take pride in the fact that I Was A Teenage Rugby Coach when I taught junior school.
    The only sport I will watch voluntarily is tennis – fastpaced, obvious rules and not too long-winded.

  167. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 9, 2013 at 20:57

    Snow!

  168. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 9, 2013 at 21:08

    How will she have the time to run for president and save America?

    The Sportsman Channel said Monday it has hired Sarah Palin to be host of a weekly outdoors-oriented program that will celebrate the “red, wild and blue” lifestyle.

    The program, “Amazing America,” will debut next April. The Sportsman Channel is in some 32 million homes, less than one-third of American households with television, with programming geared to people interested in hunting, fishing and shooting. Palin’s show will include a series of stories about personalities and activities in that vein.

    “It’s very important to have somebody of her stature as a personality on Sportsman because it validates the whole category for everybody,” said Gavin Harvey, network CEO.

  169. Failure Artist said,

    December 9, 2013 at 21:29

    I prefer her talking about the outdoors and leaving politics alone. She probably actually knows what she’s talking about in that field.

  170. Major Kong said,

    December 9, 2013 at 21:31

    I guess “red, wild and blue lifestyle” means that anyone who doesn’t hunt, fish or shoot isn’t a real ‘merican.

  171. bbkf said,

    December 9, 2013 at 21:34

    Snow!

    it’s about time…have fun freezing your nuts off!

    This old lady who doesn’t give a shit about baseball will know, bbkf.
    So, watch it, kiddo !

    d’oh!

    p.s. god just interceded in my aunt’s computer problem via my mom…although that caused asshat husband to go over and actually fix it, so…no, it won’t actually be fixed any time soon…

  172. bbkf said,

    December 9, 2013 at 21:36

    The Sportsman Channel said Monday it has hired Sarah Palin to be host of a weekly outdoors-oriented program that will celebrate the “red, wild and blue” lifestyle.

    The program, “Amazing America,” will debut next April

    uhhhh…didn’t she already have an outdoors show about alaska that was short-lived?

  173. Major Kong said,

    December 9, 2013 at 21:38

    Everybody in Alaska has a TV show these days.

    Between the ice truckers, the bush pilots, the state troopers, the gold prospectors, the crab fishermen and the “last frontier” people.

    There are something like 15 people in the whole damn state and they’re all on television.

  174. Failure Artist said,

    December 9, 2013 at 21:43

    I’m a vegetarian but I feel eating hunted wild animals is better than factory-farmed ones. Factory-farmed animals live incredibly horrible and unnatural lives while hunted animals at least get to live a decent life before getting shot. I hate carnivores who are squeamish about eating “Bambi” but eat other cute animals. I also hate that I’m not vegan. Feels rather pointless to stop eating meat animals and still be torturing egg chickens and dairy cows.

  175. bbkf said,

    December 9, 2013 at 21:46

    and the “last frontier” people.

    i can watch any of the alaska shows if i have to except for these ones…they are always going on about how difficult and sub-zero their lives are…then don’t live there you fucking moron…

  176. VCarlson said,

    December 9, 2013 at 21:54

    Snow!

    Is that a relative of “Squirrel!” or “Ooh, shiny!”?

  177. Failure Artist said,

    December 9, 2013 at 22:16

    There are no Alaskan liberals?

    Moving just isn’t always an option.

  178. Major Kong said,

    December 9, 2013 at 22:29

    A lot of people seem to live in Alaska because they’re trying to get away from somewhere else.

    My friend from the Alaska ANG always went on about the “Fortress Alaska” people as he called them.

  179. bbkf said,

    December 9, 2013 at 22:40

    Moving just isn’t always an option.

    trust me…if i had the finances and/or a job awaiting me, i would be in warmer climes in a heartbeat…hubbkf is finally getting a little tired of the cold as well, so there is a chance that i may not die as frozen as a fishstick…as it is, i’m going to have to start saving up all my tips so i can bunk in tigris’ guest room and hope she doesn’t eventually notice that i’ve actually moved in…

  180. bbkf said,

    December 9, 2013 at 22:42

    A lot of people seem to live in Alaska because they’re trying to get away from somewhere else.

    that is one thing i’ve noticed from the little bit of those shows i’ve watched…also, they apparently like working really, really hard for everything…right before thanksgiving we watched one about some family that lives up there and the whole show was about how their thanksgiving dinner was produced from breaking ground or hatching eggs or whatever to the finished product…i have no desire to be a pioneer…

  181. Failure Artist said,

    December 9, 2013 at 22:46

    Dennis has really run out of things to be offended by.

  182. Crusty Conservative Cunt said,

    December 9, 2013 at 23:00

    I hate the way you liberals “always go on about how our country sucks here in this blog”. Why can’t you talk about patriotic subjects like how the American government sucks and how a majority of the American people suck and how most of the individual states suck, too?

  183. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 9, 2013 at 23:04

    Is that a relative of “Squirrel!” or “Ooh, shiny!”?

    What was the question?

  184. Bitter Scribe said,

    December 9, 2013 at 23:26

    There are something like 15 people in the whole damn state and they’re all on television.

    Except for the Palin family. (This week.)

  185. Major Kong said,

    December 10, 2013 at 0:23

    A friend of mine just transferred to Anchorage. His next door neighbors in Wasilla? Guess who.

    Mind you “next door” in this case means “1/2 mile down the road”.

  186. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 10, 2013 at 0:30

    Oh man, how could you not knock and say hi?

  187. Major Kong said,

    December 10, 2013 at 0:40

    I can see it now:

    “Knock Knock”

    “Hi, I was wondering if I could borrow a cup of moose blood?”

  188. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 10, 2013 at 0:45

    “Knock Knock”

    “Do you have any birth-control?”

  189. El Manquécito said,

    December 10, 2013 at 0:50

    Surely it can’t be long before she drops by with a hot dish or some rice crispie squares.

  190. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 10, 2013 at 0:52

    She’s “just folks” like that.

  191. tsam said,

    December 10, 2013 at 1:18

    “It’s very important to have somebody of her stature as a personality on Sportsman because it validates the whole category for everybody,” said Gavin Harvey, network CEO.

    Heh. You mean it validates illiterate assholes who wear camouflage while not being in the military. But yeah. Everybody works too, I suppose.

  192. tsam said,

    December 10, 2013 at 1:23

    “knock knock”

    “DRILL BABY DRILL”

    Oh boy, bowchickbowbow….

  193. tsam said,

    December 10, 2013 at 1:24

    Shorter LILL

    DERRRRRRRRRP.

    derp.

    That is all.

    Derp.

  194. Major Kong said,

    December 10, 2013 at 1:31

    Here’s a nice little stocking stuffer for the junior tea-partiers in your family.

    Ted Cruz Coloring Book – Yes Really

  195. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 10, 2013 at 1:38

    Awesome comment on the source article:

    steeltoad (signed in using yahoo)
    Finally, something you can do with the ‘white’ crayon.

  196. Sarah Palin said,

    December 10, 2013 at 2:28

    The road that we are on today is too many of those angry atheists armed with attorneys would try to take away that freedom to express faith. It’s going to end in ruin unless we do something about it.

  197. Austin Loomis said,

    December 10, 2013 at 4:25

    After being reduced to a shorter, Crusty Conservative stinkyhole skrev:

    I hate the way you liberals “always go on about how our country sucks here in this blog”. Why can’t you talk about patriotic subjects like how the American government sucks and how a majority of the American people suck and how most of the individual states suck, too?

    I’m gonna trust the shorter on that one.

    Also too:

    The road that we are on today is too many of those angry atheists armed with attorneys would try to take away that freedom to express faith. It’s going to end in ruin unless we do something about it.

    Is that an actual Caribou Barbie word salad or a smuntfunching together of two or more of her vowel movements?

  198. The Dark God of Time, AKA DA® said,

    December 10, 2013 at 4:31

    The Palin quote is real, it’s from her book on how Christmas is under attack from all sides except for the majority of the people in America who believe in Christianity.

    http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2013/12/09/sarah-palin-atheist-joe-mcscrooges-trying-to-take-away-that-freedom-to-express-christmas/

  199. Major Kong said,

    December 10, 2013 at 4:33

    It’s bad enough reading her in print. Actually listening to that grinding-wheel-on-metal voice of hers will have you clawing your face off.

  200. kg said,

    December 10, 2013 at 4:47

    Ya we don’t get quite so cold as y’all minnesotans here in ellenois but damn if I’m not sick of this shit

  201. tigris said,

    December 10, 2013 at 5:29

    The road that we are on today is too many of those angry atheists armed with attorneys would try to take away that freedom to express faith

    The only way to fight a bad atheist with an attorney is a good atheist with an attorney.

  202. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 10, 2013 at 5:38

    Who are we kidding? I can’t even LIFT an attorney, let alone fight with one.

  203. tsam said,

    December 10, 2013 at 6:10

    I saw an EPIC Facebook flame war today.
    things I learned:
    America is just like Germany when that Hilter guy was taking elderly out of there homes and putting them in gas vans.
    It is immoral to get Town coffee but moral to have your baby ripped out limb by limb. (ed note; No, I have no clue what town coffee is)
    all us liberal fashists should mail our guns to Obama so he can “store” them for us.

    Apparently liberals are low information persons

  204. tsam said,

    December 10, 2013 at 6:12

    Why worry about us athiests? You can laugh at us when we’re burning in hell and you’re having sexytime with you 72 virgins and junk

  205. Religious Fanatic said,

    December 10, 2013 at 7:08

    If I can convert somebody TO atheism does that mean I can have his allotment of virgins as well as my own?

  206. Religious Fanatic said,

    December 10, 2013 at 7:12

    Hmm, on second thought, spending eternity with 144 women that nobody else would touch may not be all that great. Also, I don’t see anything in the contract that says these virgins will nescesarrily be female.

  207. Whale Chowder said,

    December 10, 2013 at 9:24

    I don’t see anything in the contract that says these virgins will nescesarrily be female.

    Is this Paradise you’re referring to or a SIG at PAX?

  208. The Dark God of Time, AKA DA® said,

    December 10, 2013 at 11:55

    Yeah, quotin’ her words like they isn’t from a real Amurican, and makin’ fun of her war for Jesus and Christmas………..

  209. Major Kong said,

    December 10, 2013 at 14:06

    As a last resort, dying blogs always resort to Sarah Palin for resuscitation

    She’s the gift that keeps on giving.

  210. El Manquécito said,

    December 10, 2013 at 14:12

    One can only imagine the skreee! that Bamz shaking hands with Raul is gonna provoke.

  211. Major Kong said,

    December 10, 2013 at 14:21

    Sarah’s just another Republican who can dish it out but can’t take it.

    On the attack she’s the “pit bull” or the “mama grizzly”.

    Come back at her and you’re picking on the poor little housewife from Wasilla.

  212. Major Kong said,

    December 10, 2013 at 14:30

    do what she does

    What’s that? Community organizer?

  213. Major Kong said,

    December 10, 2013 at 14:35

    Still trying to figure out what she does…..

    Half term governor of a state with the population of Akron?

    Failed Vice Presidential candidate?

  214. Major Kong said,

    December 10, 2013 at 14:43

    That’s the best you’ve got? Must be a slow morning over there.

  215. Major Kong said,

    December 10, 2013 at 14:53

    And yet here you are Dennis. Here you are.

    Not sure what that says about you that you have to hand out with a bunch of people that you don’t even like.

  216. Failure Artist said,

    December 10, 2013 at 14:57

    If this blog is so pathetic, why are you spending so much time and energy on it? Can’t make it trolling in the big leagues? Don’t tell me you want to reform us.

  217. Failure Artist said,

    December 10, 2013 at 15:17

    Sorry, I’m not interested in you. Maybe we can just be strangers?

  218. Major Kong said,

    December 10, 2013 at 17:00

    She’s just so gosh darned mavericky don’t ya know.

  219. Major Kong said,

    December 10, 2013 at 17:06

    At least I don’t think it’s still 1980 like most conservatives seem to.

  220. Major Kong said,

    December 10, 2013 at 17:10

    If she’s so irrelevant why does Fox have her on so much of the time?

    You can’t have it both ways.

    If she’s relevant then she’s fair game.
    If she’s not, then that’s self explanatory.

    You pick.

  221. Major Kong said,

    December 10, 2013 at 17:26

    Well let’s see, how many web hits do I get on “Cruz” and “Reagan”, oh my that’s a lot. Sure glad they’re not stuck in 1980 or anything.

  222. Failure Artist said,

    December 10, 2013 at 17:42

    You’ve changed my mind, obsessed troll! I’m going to stop having fun on a website and become the next Sarah Palin!

  223. Some guy said,

    December 10, 2013 at 17:46

    Just watching the Mandela funeral and reminiscing… I remember how Reagan and Thatcher insisted Mandela was a communist and refused to consider sanctions against apartheid South Africa…

    I remember how Canada’s Brian Mulroney was THE ONLY prominent conservative willing to take a stand, support sanctions and condemn apartheid.

    Your ignorant, racist conservative tribe has a lot to be ashamed of, Pennis.

  224. The Dark God of Time, AKA DA® said,

    December 10, 2013 at 18:46

    She doesn’t beg for money yet you call her a grifter.

    If SarahPAC were a publicly traded company, its shareholders would be revolting. If SarahPAC were a charity, it could face allegations of fraud.

    But because Sarah Palin’s political action committee is dedicated primarily to promoting the political profile of the former Alaska governor and former VP nominee, it can get away with spending more than it takes in—and doling out nearly $97 to Palin’s inner circle for every $1 that went to elect Republicans.

    Over the first half of 2013, SarahPAC took in $460,000, but spent more than $495,000. Despite its stated purpose of supporting like-minded candidates, it donated to only one—giving $5,000 to Jason Smith, a conservative Republican backed by the NRA and pro-life groups who won a special election in Missouri’s Eighth Congressional District in June by a margin of 67–27.

    In contrast, the group spent almost $484,000 on fundraising, research, speechwriting, and high-end travel. This is a comedown from the 2012 cycle, when SarahPAC raised eyebrows for spending more than $4.8 million on consultants while doling out $298,500 to candidates.

    http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2013/08/02/sarah-palin-s-donors-don-t-care-where-money-s-going.html

    Well, I guess grifting for others is a bit better than for doing it just for herself.

  225. Dennis D'Anus said,

    December 10, 2013 at 18:48

    “Why is Ted Cruz the only serving US Senator at the Mandela funeral?”

    Yeah, why, especially when we already sent our leader? Surely Cruz and Mandela were close friends, is all.

    No, on reflection I see that he’s just seeking attention of idiots like myself, and getting it.

  226. Whale Chowder said,

    December 10, 2013 at 18:53

    Hey Pennis, I think you’ve missed an email. Today’s talking point is about how us loony libs are stealing your freedum to stare at womens’ BOOBIEZ.

    Do try to keep up.

  227. The Media said,

    December 10, 2013 at 19:52

    Obama shaking a paw with Uncle Fidel?

    RUN MEDIAGASM.EXE

  228. The Media said,

    December 10, 2013 at 20:01

    What?
    Really?
    It was RAUL Castro?!?!?

    NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

  229. Pupienus Maximus said,

    December 10, 2013 at 20:12

    Oh please.

    http://youtu.be/yE8e3IVM1Xk

  230. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 10, 2013 at 20:40

    Many of those waiting in line wore a pin that read “It’s OK to Wish Me a Merry Christmas”

    Seasonal depression CONQUERED.

  231. acrannymint said,

    December 10, 2013 at 20:48

    I hate carnivores who are squeamish about eating “Bambi” but eat other cute animals I really don’t like the taste of “Bambi” or most varieties of “Nemo” either.

  232. tsam said,

    December 10, 2013 at 20:51

    I’m not responsible for what may happen when you smile at me and wish me a merry…anything. #justsayin #Grinch #hashtag

  233. The Dark God of Time, AKA DA® said,

    December 10, 2013 at 20:52

    It’s wonderful to see Sarah take on the War Against Christmas with such boldness, it’s wonderful that she can make money at doing the right thing and protecting American Christianity against the atheist/librul haters out there.

  234. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 10, 2013 at 20:52

    Speaking of Mandela analogies.

  235. acrannymint said,

    December 10, 2013 at 20:57

    Pupienus Maximus, That clip was facepalm worthy for sure

  236. tigris said,

    December 10, 2013 at 21:01

    Many of those waiting in line wore a pin that read “It’s OK to Wish Me a Merry Christmas”

    On December 6, no less. However, in the spirit of the season, I retroactively wish them a Krampusnacht of not being stuffed into a sack and eaten. Also, have a joyous Epiphany.

  237. tsam said,

    December 10, 2013 at 21:01

    GM gets a female CEO. Said female actually worked her way up through the company

    Cheers, GM.

  238. Failure Artist said,

    December 10, 2013 at 21:42

    People also flock to Stephanie Meyers and E.L. James book signings. That doesn’t mean their work is any good. I know you’ll say it’s unfair since I haven’t read the book, but the book is probably just a rehash of the War on Christmas talking points that pop up every year. Nothing ground-breaking.

  239. Pupienus Maximus said,

    December 10, 2013 at 21:57

    Time to link this REAL Americans entry from a few years back. I saw it again recently – was it linkeed from here maybe? My neurocognitive disorder is having a good day so whatever.

  240. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 10, 2013 at 22:01

    White Bronco was suppose to have a press event a few minutes from now, but it’s been delayed half an hour. I guess they are hoping that a couple cups of coffee will make him look less drunk.

    He will be again doing the presser from his office, forcing the hordes of media folks to cram into a dangerously crowded hallway. And they will cram themselves there so as not to miss it when he finally resigns or makes comments about oral sex.

    My guess is that he is going to wish everyone a Merry Christmas and then some pre-campaign electioneering.

  241. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 10, 2013 at 22:30

    Well, another half hour delay. Presser at 4. On the plus side, the delay is likely because they are moving to a better location with more room.

  242. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 10, 2013 at 23:06

    Apparently, he needed a presser to announce that he is still opposed to the Land Transfer Tax – one of the dreaded new taxes that evil Mayor David Miller imposed upon the taxpayers of LEAFS SUCK and White Bronco has not yet managed to vanquish.

  243. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 10, 2013 at 23:10

    Whoa. He’s admitting defeat. But only against the dreaded Land Transfer Tax. He’s no longer pushing for killing it since he now faces the reality that no one is listening to him. Now he’s only looking for a 5% cut to it.

    BTW, you know what always accompanies conservatives talking about cutting taxes? More spending! If White Bronco gets his way, my Scarburb will be blessed with an outdoor skating rink! Um,,, w00t?

  244. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 10, 2013 at 23:18

    Okay, some background. This weekend Rob Ford had a sit down interview with convicted felon Lord Black of Crossharbour. During that interview he accused one of the Toronto Star’s reporters of being a pedophile. Well he got a couple questions about it, doubled down (“I stand by every word”) and then left in a huff.

  245. Pupienus Maximus said,

    December 10, 2013 at 23:20

    Maybe they weren’t stolen. It’s been so cold they probably died of exposure then ascended into heaven.

  246. Austin Loomis said,

    December 10, 2013 at 23:21

    It’s come to this…..

    Baby Jesus Stolen From Two Nativity Scenes

    So Christmas gives people who were going to be dicks at any time of the year a whole new seasonal way to be dicks. I’m waiting for the evidence of some organized “War on Christmas” (other than the war on the teachings of Jesus that Christians have been waging ever since the sainted Emperor Constantine), but I’m not exactly going to hold my breath.

  247. Pupienus Maximus said,

    December 10, 2013 at 23:22

    I have some Internet friends who are “vandalizing” nativity displays. They’re adding dinosaurs to the menagerie.

  248. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 10, 2013 at 23:28

    It is a truth universally acknowledged, that without stealing the baby Jesus you cannot maim and mutilate him.

  249. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 10, 2013 at 23:29

    Eeewwww, Pup is internet friends with Kirk Cameron.

  250. Austin Loomis said,

    December 10, 2013 at 23:31

    Pup: I think it was linked in the comments of a Charles Pierce post that was linked in comments of a post here, but I can’t remember enough of the comment to ctrl-F it. That makes me a sad panda.

  251. Nym said,

    December 10, 2013 at 23:37

    Some neighbors down the street from me have an oh-so-twee snowman nativity they put up (not yet, but soon). I keep fighting the evil temptation to add a caganer to it (the “soft serve ice cream” gag).

  252. Pupienus Maximus said,

    December 10, 2013 at 23:38

    I just had lunch damn you OBS!

  253. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 10, 2013 at 23:41

    I just had lunch damn you OBS!

    Awww, you’re welcome!

  254. Helmut Monotreme said,

    December 10, 2013 at 23:50

    Could be worse, the baby thieves could have left a changeling.

  255. Thread Bear said,

    December 10, 2013 at 23:53

    All my liberal friends on the Internet are truthful.

    Not me, everything I post on here is a lie. Including this post.

  256. Major Kong said,

    December 10, 2013 at 23:54

    The dinosaur idea has merit.

  257. VCarlson said,

    December 10, 2013 at 23:56

    It’s come to this…..

    Baby Jesus Stolen From Two Nativity Scenes

    So Christmas gives people who were going to be dicks at any time of the year a whole new seasonal way to be dicks. I’m waiting for the evidence of some organized “War on Christmas” (other than the war on the teachings of Jesus that Christians have been waging ever since the sainted Emperor Constantine), but I’m not exactly going to hold my breath.

    Couple things:

    This particular form of “high spirits” has been going on for a looong time – it certainly predates “Teh Librul War on Christmas.”

    Second, as my mother liked to point out, the baby Jesus has no business in the cradle of a Nativity scene until Christmas Day, anyway. She was raised “foot washin’ Baptist,” (though, as she liked to say, it didn’t take), and she knew whereof she spoke.

    And, yeah. What Austin said.

  258. Thread Bear said,

    December 10, 2013 at 23:57

    An idea from David Brin

    http://davidbrin.blogspot.com/

    The wealth tax is interesting, though my own suggestion is a bit different. Instead of seizing assets (which the American Founders did) or raising rates dramatically (per Franklin Roosevelt), let’s try something uniquely modern, with-it and in tune with transparency. It must be done worldwide, but it would not be considered quite as radical as asset taxation. Indeed, it is blatantly the fairest reform possible.
    Simply pass a universal world treaty declaring: If you own something, you must openly avow and say that you own it.
    That’s it. Any property that has not been claimed by a human being, family, or clearly tracked group of humans within three years will revert to the state and be re-sold to pay down the public debt.

  259. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 11, 2013 at 0:06

    That’s it. Any property that has not been claimed by a human being, family, or clearly tracked group of humans within three years will revert to the state and be re-sold to pay down the public debt.

    Um, what? Where is all this mysterious unclaimed “property” right now?

  260. Major Kong said,

    December 11, 2013 at 0:14

    I call dibs on Manhattan.

  261. Pupienus Maximus said,

    December 11, 2013 at 0:15

    I own Santa Barbara. All of it.

  262. Helmut Monotreme said,

    December 11, 2013 at 0:22

    As long as we are giving away property, I claim Jackson Hole WY, Kaikoura NZ, and Ross Island, the royal society range of transantarctic mountains and the dry valleys of Antarctica. Don’t worry, I’m not greedy, I’ll share.

    I also really like Byron Bay Australia, so if no one else wants it, I’ll take that too.

  263. El Manquécito said,

    December 11, 2013 at 0:26

    I’ll take large parts of the Red Rocks; Capitol Reef and Zion would do.

  264. Major Kong said,

    December 11, 2013 at 0:30

    Act quick or you’ll get stuck with Newark.

  265. Suezboo said,

    December 11, 2013 at 0:31

    I’ll have the Peninsula part of Cape Town but I think maybe the Khoisan have prior ownership – they found caves with evidence of human habitation from way back. Mussel shells and paintings and so forth.
    Lawd, land reform and restitution in SA is such a bloody awful mess, we should all just emigrate.

  266. Suezboo said,

    December 11, 2013 at 0:33

    I’d also like a slice of Antarctica, if that’s OK with you, Helmut

  267. The Dark God of Time, AKA DA® said,

    December 11, 2013 at 0:33

    I call dibs on the North Beach area of San Francisco. Just keep making pasta dishes and focaccia and nobody gets hurt.

  268. tsam said,

    December 11, 2013 at 0:43

    HAWAII IS MINE.

  269. tsam said,

    December 11, 2013 at 0:43

    First order of business: Expel all the honkies.

  270. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 11, 2013 at 0:48

    OK, I read his bit and it goes into more detail after the quoted passage. Apparently he thinks that people won’t be willing to actually claim all their illicit shit, stuff owned by more-than-three-levels-deep shell corporations, etc., and would somehow rather let that revert to the state than claim ownership.

    I find that… unlikely at best.

    Anyway, his heart’s in the right place at least. He did tack this bit on the end too:

    Oh… I’d also institute worldwide a very tiny, 0.1% financial instruments transaction fee. It could save the human species from extinction and do more for our children than any other levy!

    Nice idea. Who collects this tax?

  271. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 11, 2013 at 0:49

    Also, I have clear claim to Oregon and all its beer, obviously.

  272. El Manquécito said,

    December 11, 2013 at 0:52

    A financial transactions tax is too obvious and logical to ever be considered.

  273. tsam said,

    December 11, 2013 at 0:53

    Nice idea. Who collects this tax?

    Oh boy–the coincidence of this question during an Obama administration is almost certain to spin out more than a few of those John Bitch Society fucks.

  274. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 11, 2013 at 1:00

    I dunno WHO would object to using jackbooted UN thugs to collect taxes…

  275. Thread Bear said,

    December 11, 2013 at 1:00

    The long hard smooch of the law

    http://www.theonion.com/video/bloomberg-defends-nypds-controversial-stop-and-kis,34731/

  276. Pupienus Maximus said,

    December 11, 2013 at 2:40

    He said the nine Twitchy staff writers, disparately located around the country,

    WOW! NINE staff writers! NINE writers to, as Wonkette put it, To copy-paste the code for “embed tweet” and then add SNAP.

    Must be a hugely successful site – worth hundreds of millions if not billions!

    Managing Editors: Jenn Taylor, Lori Ziganto
    Editors: Sarah Desprat, Brett Taylor, Doug Powers
    Contributing Editors: William Amos, Jacob Bunn, Adam Brickley, El Sooper, Erik Soderstrom

    Imma thinking those contributing editors aren’t, like, full time paid employees. Let’s take a look at them.

    Jacob Bunn @jacobbunn

    Jacob’s passion is his Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Lives in Birmingham, Alabama, and is studying Public Relations in college. He is a sports reporter, writer, and podcaster, primarily covering college football. He is a member of the Football and Basketball Writers Associations of America. He owns and publishes http://www.BunnSports.com. Additionally, he is involved in various other sports media projects.

    I see, a slacker godbothering student with delusions of grandeur.

    Adam Brickley @adambrickley

    Adam is a conservative blogger best known for his 2007-2008 venture “Draft Sarah Palin for Vice President,” which garnered national media attention. Adam has been published by the Daily Caller, the Weekly Standard Blog, Conservatives4Palin, and Race42012.com. He has appeared on CNN, FoxNews, the BBC, and The Colbert Report. He is a passionate follower of international politics and elections, active in Messianic Judaism, a foodie, a Trekkie, a musical theatre nerd, and a semi-obsessed fanboy of Australian conservative leader Tony Abbott. Originally from Colorado Springs, Colo., Adam currently lives and works in the District of Columbia. For those wondering, yes he still thinks Sarah Palin is awesome.

    Such an impressive bio leads me to wonder who his whingnut sugar daddy is. Name does sound familiar … Oh yeah, Adam Brickley explains how he influenced the direction of American politics from his mom’s house. (starts at about the 5:30 mark)

    William Amos @williamamos

    William has a degree in International Studies/Russian Language. He has worked as a political intern in both state and federal races. He enjoys politics, both foreign and domestic. He has been a Republican since he cast his first vote for Ronald Reagan in 1980. He loves to travel and has a dream to get on the TV Travel show “The Amazing Race” with his brother.

    tl;dr: LOSER

    El Sooper @soopermexican

    El Sooper is best known for his composition of auto-bios in the third person. He is an anonymous blogger and conservative social media activist sharknado. He was born and raised in communist southern California, but was exiled for his right-wing extremism to communist New York, where he practices his right wing extremism. In his off-time, he likes to hunt chupacabras and cook delicious Mexican food. These two endeavors are unrelated. He blogs on his website, records a weekly podcast, and creates humorous youtube videos that offend liberals and delight rational people. He likes philosophy, theology, and literature. It is suspected that he is, in fact, a white Hispanic. He contributes to the Independent Journal Review, and Fox News Latino. The highlights of his career include making Thomas Sowell laugh, and hearing Dana Perino say “soopermexican” on Fox News.

    I’m not even going there.

  277. Pupienus Maximus said,

    December 11, 2013 at 2:41

    awshit.

  278. Cerberus said,

    December 11, 2013 at 3:07

    New post.

  279. Austin Loomis said,

    December 11, 2013 at 3:33

    Dennis, with his bare face hanging out, solemnly stated:

    This blog goes in to power-down mode when I don’t post here

    Which explains the tumbleweeds whistling through comment threads once the mods have come and swept up all your mango pulp. In the words of a great American philosopher, “Is that really what they believe on the planet you’re from?”

  280. Dr BLT's Ghost of Christmas Past said,

    December 19, 2013 at 0:00

    So the analogy was less than optimal. Do any of you have a more apt analogy to offer, or are we just looking for reasons to beat up conservatives? I’m not a conservative, BTW, I’m just not into scraping the bottom of the barrow looking for reasons to beat them up.

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