Nov
14

Indie Tour Set 1: Fagetarian and Dyke




Posted at 13:20 by Cerberus

Well, maybe this three hour tour won’t be so bad…

John “Jesus Was a” Carpenter, iPost, uPost, Wii All Post for Christian Post:
The Zero Sum Game of “Gay Rights”

Obamacare, Obamacare, Obamacare, Obamacare, Obamacare…

The fetid river reeks of the spilled blood of a thousand corpses. Nothing new for these well-trod veins through the heart of this vile jungle, but it has become worse to bear now.

Where once these streams flowed free well enough for our boat to avoid the rot and decay that surrounded us, the river has now dried up, leaving us stranded among the human wreckage, our every sense assaulted.

The unholy din from the trees hath been our only companion for who knows how many fortnights. A monomaniacal cry of Obamacare pierces through the day and night. Sleep is a distant dream and I fear what remains of my wits will die along with my body on this rotted wastes…

Or I could just say fuck it and take the stream less traveled.

Eh… fuck it.

Shorter (or the last port before Jungle):

  • If I can’t tell you are an inferior swine just by looking at you, then clearly you are the real bigoted oppressor. Take that, you fucking faggot!

In retrospect, it makes perfect sense that the “main” shows would all be stuck on Obamacare repeat. The Big Money is fucking terrified about the fact that despite their best efforts, the health care improvements are actually looking like they’re a slight improvement and might give Obama a lasting positive legacy unlike that enjoyed by any Republican president since Eisenhower. And so the orders are to shut it down. Or rather to scream incessantly about it in the hopes that if you blow enough smoke over an area, everyone will suddenly start hallucinating fire.

Which unfortunately leaves us snark merchants in a little bit of a bind. I mean, there’s only so much one can say about repeated desperate pointless lies about a program that has already passed and is so popular that it’s operating at a couple 100%s capacity.

It’s a slight improvement on health care and cuts out some of the most egregious scams perpetrated by the industry. There’s only so much to say on the topic.

So if the “big names” in the conservative movement insist on engaging in some strange aural version of the Chinese Water Torture, then maybe it’s time to go underground.

Time to chuck off these boring repetitive “mainstream” labels and check out the raw indie sound of those who have spent so long in the deep tiger-infested forest that they’ve become popular children’s story heroes based on racist myths of the inherent superiority of white man DNA.

That’s right! It’s time to peek in on the sites that would never before merit a Sadly, No! treatment and see what new crazy is being generated where hallucinogens and white male angst collide.

And take a tour of the unknown streams of this vast and terrifying jungle.

Our first port of call is an attempt by the Christian Post to horn in on The Guardian’s very successful “Comment is Free” blog network, only instead of being filled with semi-intelligent blog posts covering a wide array of little-mentioned issues and from little-heard-from perspectives, it’s filled with Rapturist Diehards carefully pouring over their copies of Left Behind to make sure their Prepper Compound’s Beer Supply won’t be adversely affected by the collapse of society.

Perhaps the most effective argument for full legal legitimization of homosexuality is that being a homosexual is comparable to being a member of any other identity group, like being Chinese or black or Jewish.

I mean, it’s almost like they were people instead of three-headed snake monsters from the Planet G’tang. What. The. Fuck!

It’s akin to ethnicity, never mind that ethnicity is easily discernible by a quick look in the mirror

I mean, we know that the dirty filthy spics, niggers, or chinks are worthless chattel just by looking at them, but with the faggots, you can never tell. One a dem could be your bestest buddy for 20 years and you’d never know until he unhinged his jaw and birthed a tiny Joan Crawford from within his upper thorax.

Also, um… on that whole racial minority being visually obvious thing, yeah, sadly, no!

whereas “sexual orientation” is often the agonizing question of many years, for some, and apparently ignores the normal conclusion of a look in the mirror.

Which clearly is completely unrelated to rampant and unending discrimination against all those who admit to their attractions, the lack of mirrored life experiences in most mainstream entertainment, and of course, all the bigots trying to pretend that sexual attraction is a choice and those who are not straight just didn’t try hard enough*.

Nevertheless, the cause of “gay rights” has been furthered by claiming, first, that being homosexual is a matter of innate identity,

Luckily for the health and safety of those who would be targeted by these fag-born doppelgangers from Rigel VII, we were able to clearly and unequivocally prove that false… right? We did actually complete that step, right guys?

Well, fu-

like race, and therefore to treat homosexuals differently is morally equivalent to racism.

And clearly as racist is the worst thing you can ever call someone and so worse than suffering actual racism, so it is for “homophobia” and Christian bigots are the Jews of Fabulous Fascism… right? Sorry, after that whole disproven fiasco, I’m kinda not sure where we’re going with this shit.

f that were the case, “gay rights” is a subset of human rights and so we’d expect to see the same positive expansion of freedoms for all people, wherever “gay rights” have gained ascendancy, just as we have whenever civil rights have expanded. But the opposite has been the case.

Thank you.

Now it all make-

Wait. What the holy loving fuck?

Full civil rights for blacks in the USA has been a positive for all Americans. Whites are better off with African-Americans not compelled to sit in the back of the bus or attend second-rate schools. The expansion of justice for black Americans has meant that white Americans don’t have to fear an aggrieved under-class is going to break out in race riots. They are better off morally and spiritually in not treating some of their neighbors as inferiors. Civil rights for ethnicities is a positive sum game, meaning we all come out winners. “Freedom and justice for all” results in a positive gain for all.

But “gay rights” is different. With every expansion of “gay rights” comes a loss of freedom for others, particularly those who, whether for religious or purely rational reasons, refuse to acknowledge the functional and moral equivalency of homosexuality.

Uh huhhhh. Yeah, little bit of a history lesson there, bucko. Back in the day, the “race realists” at the time who bristled at the notion that common sense observations of the inferiority of non-European stock could ever have been compared to the course regionalism that had led people to discriminate against whites for having been from German or Irish bloodlines, said the exact same fucking crap.

And they sure as shit thought that expanding rights to those inferior curs was a zero sum gain and they were actively losing very important religious and/or personal rights every time the law said they had to treat an inferior negro the same as a proper white man.

Letting a black woman sit in front or attend schools was an infringement of their most basic rights and marked the end of civilization as they knew it.

Hell, we don’t need to do a thought experiment to the distant past, there are still plenty alive today who view the existence of a black man as president, a right that has been legally allowed to them technically since this country began, as some unfair and insidious attack on them personally.

It’s simply the problem with oppression. The oppressor always views their unfair advantage as “natural” and any attempt to alleviate the suffering of the oppressed as a robbing of their “natural rights”.

It is a zero-sum-game, meaning when one side wins, the other loses.

There is a limited number of weddings. Every time a gay couple gets legally recognized as a committed relationship, a straight couple is taken out back and shot.

A baker or florist or photographer or reception hall owner who believes that homosexuality is wrong and does not want to offer his services to a homosexual wedding is now increasingly likely to be compelled to do so or face the loss of freedom to earn a living. Today people are facing the choice between whether to stay true to their beliefs or lend material support to a practice they regard as immoral.

I changed the word “homosexuality” to “miscegenation” and the word “homosexual” to “interracial” and it was the strangest thing, it suddenly transformed into an exact piece contemporary bigots were writing 50 years ago.

I mean, that’s just plain bizarre, right?

Just here, the homosexual rights advocate will insist that this is no different than the white racist having to serve blacks at his lunch counter or let them sit at the front of the bus, if they so choose.

Holy shit! The snark targets have become self-aware! RUN FOR THE HILLS!!!

The difference is that in no case was discriminating against blacks called for by a religion.

… Bwahaha!

Oh, you poor deluded, brain-addled fucker. Roll the list:

Curse of Ham, any of the passages in the Old Testament or the Letters of Paul the Fucker on the existence of, trading of, and care for slaves and slave castes, Leviticus (because if it’s something terrible, you can be damn well be sure there’s a Leviticus quote to support it), and of course the numerous passages about how a slaves role was to obey their master and never think of emancipation. And of course, all the various shit the actual sects have pulled, such as Southern Baptists being literally created out of a racist schism or pretty much anything to do with the Mormons.

And that’s just the teaser trailer.

But I don’t know why you even bother to pretend. It’s just a facet of human behavior that if there’s something terrible and authoritarian people want to justify then people will twist their Holy Books to support it and make those passages the most important passages on the planet.

I mean, fuck, look at today with the wingnuts trying to argue that their God’s biggest hate-on is abortion when there is literally fuck-all about it in their supposed Most Holy of Texts or just the anti-gay movement which has like less than a dozen tops against male homosexuality, nothing against female homosexuality, and at least two major homosexual couples in the Bible who are lauded as great religious heroes.

Hell, there is still calls for discrimination against blacks based on religion right the fuck now so I really don’t know who you thought you were fooling with this wishful fucking bullshit.

Some misguided churches may have interpreted their religion that way but

Yeah, that’s about what I thought. No one.

the pages of the Bible are quite clear that “in Christ there is no Jew nor Greek” (Gal. 2:28) that the Lord wants us to “do justice” (Micah 6:8). Even such churches that succumbed to the cultural sin of racism were the minority. The late Professor Robert Fogel, Nobel laureate, found that it was Christians who ended the institution of slavery. Other religions also do not call their adherents to oppress people based on race. I know of no major religion that supports racism. Hence, there never was a precedent of a religion encouraging people to oppress a race and that was over-ridden by the constitution’s “equal protection” clause.

Is your actual history an embarrassing succession of being on the wrong side of history and supporting things that have rapidly become horrifying to support in the modern age? Do you worry you might actually have to grow up and accept filthy underclasses as full and equal human beings or accept the movement of history?

Well, why not choose new Denial®? Never worry again about having to apologize for the crimes perpetrated against a group who has successfully clawed their way outside your grasp. You can just claim that you were helping those poor sods the entire time.

Now, you might be wondering, but what about those who actually know what happened or read about it in a book? Well, worry no more!

New Denial® comes with a full complete package including aggressive pressure against public schools, methods of ensuring your brood remain as ignorant as you, and a compliant media that will never ever call you out on your bullshit.

So buy new Denial® today!

What we have now is something entirely new in US history: people’s 1st amendment rights to practice their faith are being abrogated for the sake of furthering legal legitimization to a sexual preference.

Nevar before has such an indignity been forced, forced I say, on the American people in direct opposition to what religious bigots say is their first amendment rights to perpetuate hate on people based on their sexual preference.

Okay, maybe there was that whole Loving v Virginia thing. And there was the way the 13th Amendment ripped the right of proper white statesmen to own their own personal black fuck-toy. And the various anti-Marital-rape laws passed by 1993, which blocked a patriot’s ability to use even their own wife in this way.

I mean, not to go so dark we end up slipping into the Twilight Zone here, but pretty much every time we look at some horrible reality and belatedly realize that maybe we should stop, there is a reliable troupe of fucked up assholes who are right there bitching that it takes away their all important first amendment rights to be a sickening asshole.

The Puritans came to America for the right to live and worship as they believed God had told them in the Bible. Now that right is being stripped from Christians in the nation they helped create. As homosexual rights increase; Christians’ freedoms decrease.

Name one.

Exactly what is one singular “freedom” that is robbed from you by some queer person just out living their life.

Cause, I’ve been seeing this argument for the last 10+ years, yet every time it’s come to the “proof” of this tautology it comes back to the same handful of cases which are always either:

A) Oh noes! We’re not allowed to fleece the government for free money while also refusing to accept the current government’s laws. WAAAH! We deserve free money!

B) It’s unfair! We tried to ruin the lives of filthy faggots and then they called us bigots and told their friends not to give us money. No one said there would be social consequences to fucking over someone.

or

C) WAAAH! We were happily fucking with queer people and then the mean government said we couldn’t do that anymore. How dare the mean old government infringe on our critical religious belief of going out of our way to be an imposition to the free lives of people we arbitrarily hate.

So exactly how, absent you going out of your way to fuck with me, is, to choose an example, my life as a trans* queer asexual in a polyamorous relationship (oooh extra scary) in any way robbing your freedom.

When I go to work, come home, fuck my partner and my girlfriend, where in there is an action that in any way affects your life in any other way than there is a tiny chance you may encounter me as a person who exists in the world and you’ll have to deal with that much as you would everything else that exists in this world?

Cause I’m honestly curious.

Thus far, according to “Crisis” magazine, there have been at least 11 instances of Christian business people facing threats, boycotts, protests, and the intervention of state or judicial authorities because they denied services for celebrating what either their faith or their reason (or both) told them was wrong.

Some of these things are not like the others. Some of these things just don’t belong.

Don’t like the free market? Stop worshiping it as a graven idol, you inbred fucks.

Some of them have been forced out of business.

Oh noes! Some bigots owned businesses that were rather dependent on queer patrons and tried to actively piss on their clientele in a completely bone-headed financial decision and ended up having their business fail because the owner was a self-destructive moron? What a terrible fate.

I was driven out of a job I loved for simply existing as I am. I didn’t share any thoughts about Christians being bigots. In fact, I treated homeschool religious groups exactly the same as any other class. And for that, my performance was ignored and I was bullied and harried and when I refused to quit, they stripped my hours and didn’t bother sending me a welcome back email for the new year.

So excuse me if I and the many thousands of other queer identified folks who have suffered the same have a little hard of a time feeling sorry for less than a dozen of morons and fuckwits who managed to torpedo their companies into the ground being complete fucking morons and wannabe martyrs.

Others have been harassed on-line, especially through facebook,

Oh no. Clearly no one non-white or non-Christian has ever been harassed on-line before. Bitch, I have full-bore stalkers. Call me when you receive your first simultaneous rape and death threat.

or had to spend time and money defending themselves in court.

That tends to be what happens when you break the law.

Hey, brainstorm, why don’t you try not breaking the law next time? It might go over a little better and involve fewer court fees.

Hebrews 10:34 describes one of the first types of persecution encountered by the early church as the “plundering” or confiscation of their property (Hebrews 10:34). The Roman Empire squeezed Christians economically. Now the United States, as a direct result of the rise of “gay rights”, is seeing just that kind of persecution.

And thank you for that wonderful demonstration of my earlier point about Holy Texts being stretched and molded to claim just about whatever point a bigoted and authoritarian fuckwit wants them to state.

Illustrative is the tone and tactics of those advocating “gay rights”.

True fact, you don’t deserve rights if you are ever cross or upset about oppression. Real true deserving oppressed groups never move beyond a polite cough and a vague gesture in the direction of the iron bootheel digging into their scrote.

In the past, champions of civil rights for oppressed groups, like Martin Luther King, genuinely sought the good of society as a whole. They were usually respectful of those they were seeking to change, gentle in tone, inclusive and winsome in their tactics, and lofty in their goals. One cannot listen to the eloquent rhetoric of the “I have a dream” speech and not be inspired by it. In the past, civil rights for all meant civility toward all.

Uh huhhhhhh.

I think somebody should take a moment to listen to pretty much any other MLK speech in existence.

I don’t think they’re going to like it very much.

Again, “gay rights” is different. Where’s the uniting leader?

Who’s your authoritarian leader that we can discredit and/or assassinate? We need to know**.

I mean, otherwise we might have to acknowledge that not everyone worships singular personality cults or let’s a single authority tell them how they live their lives. And that’s just too horrifying to even contemplate right now.

Where’s the civility?

Another true fact. Every rights movement before the queer rights movement was always heralded by their contemporary opponents as courteous and civil and were never ever demonized as half-crazed rabble-rousers who were so very unlike “real” “deserving” oppressed groups.

Instead, they’ve given us the near terrorist antics of ACT-UP,

ACT-UP? Yes, clearly they have strayed the line far too close to terrorism, what with only ever organizing protests and never engaging in violent actions despite being an organization formed by the desperation of being literally left for dead by an uncaring bigoted public who was viewing the AIDS epidemic as a “blessing” that was “solving the gay problem”.

Oh sure, the opponent numbers have actually committed regular terrorist actions, but a single ACT-UP member once broke a communion wafer so clearly Double Mecha Hitler.

the obscene rhetoric of Dan Savage attacking the Bible as ˜bull—-” – ironically at an anti-bullying conference – calling those who walked out of his tirade as “”pansy-a—”;

I’m sorry, that’s just too fucking precious to get pissy about. Oh poor, widdle babies, did the mean old Mr. Savage make you scared with his usage of curse words and belonging to a different faith. There, there, nookums, mommy will make it all better with an anti-gay bill or two.

the picture of angry homosexuals desecrating the Catholic Mass;

That’s ACT-UP again. You just counted ACT-UP twice.

Are you so hard up on “oppression” that you need to count events twice just to fill the space?

… no, stop answering that. It was rhetorical.

the insulting and often obscene language that moved Prof. Li-Ann Thio to call them “homofacists”.

We call you fascists, clearly that is proof that you are. Because why else would we call you that. Ipso facto motherfucker!

So. Yeah, from a list of 4 events, the only 4 events actually listed rather than vaguely alluded to, we have, Dan Savage used bad words, an example of your group of fascist bigots trying to pull an IT’S ALWAYS PROJECTION, and a double-counted example of a single protestor breaking a wafer… in 1989.

You know, I had my doubts, but you’ve convinced me. These queer monsters need to be stopped.

Some of them troll the web-pages of Christian organizations, attacking and insulting any who dare profess to support those organizations. These are not the tactics of freedom fighters seeking to expand the blessings of justice. These are the tactics of oppressors who are using the cloak of freedom to impose its opposite on those with whom they disagree.

Well isn’t that a fine mess of IT’S ALWAYS PROJECTION seeing as how every queer identified, liberal identified, atheist identified, or feminist identified blog on the internet can expect a never-ending flood of dedicated religious bigot trolls trying to disrupt conversations and just generally fling shit.

But please, do go on about the occasional sane person who stumbles on your houses of crazy and actually tries to engage you in some dialogue, ceasing either before or after you rather quickly ban them (and then going away, because they actually have a life beyond desperately needing the validation of people they claim to hate and feel superior to).

The reason for this disparity has to do with the nature of homosexuality itself.

Oooh, is it related to space radiation? Please say it’s related to space radiation!

Certainly some people likely feel a strong inclination toward that behavior. They deserve our compassion and support, especially if they are willing to do the hard work of trying to over-come those temptations.

I mean, all we’re asking is that you spend your life in the closet, constantly despising yourself for something you can’t change, resenting every boner or wet spot until you die unfulfilled and unloved because a bunch of bigots couldn’t handle a world where people like you exist and are just the same as anyone else.

I mean, isn’t that a fair price to pay for the vague promise of pie in the sky when you die?

But to be homosexual people – no matter the strength of their psychological inclinations – they still have to choose to engage in it.

Oh, of course. Like how one can be born black and struggle against that sinful abomination of a skin tone and treat themselves with cleansing chemicals to bleach their skin and make it holy and that is… okay, in the sense that they are forever a poor miserable wretch we look down upon.

But if one chooses to live a black lifestyle, say by being visibly black in a location it is not expected or wearing clothing or listening to music we retroactively decide is too “urban” then we are completely justified in gunning down your children in the streets.

Oh sorry, I think there was supposed to be a joke in there, but that’s actually pretty much how that actually works.

Unlike belonging to an ethnic group, people have to choose to be homosexual and they are responsible for that choice, no matter how strong their inclination toward it is.

Of course, I mean, clearly I choose to be trans* and have my entire world flip the fuck out from under me. Because of all the benefits like… uh… er… heh.

But seriously, two things pop into mind here:

1) Exactly how much of a dick is your God supposed to be here. I mean, in your little ideal universe setup here, you think that God is just sitting up on his throne, throwing this powerful, soul crushing, more powerful than prayer condition on people just so he can send his followers to smite them for failing to repress themselves and live miserable painful lives.

And you expect us to worship this God instead of finding a way to nuke this “Heaven” place from orbit?

Also…

2) I kind of expect this tactic of “it’s a choice” to see an even stronger revival as queer rights improve and it becomes easier for at least white middle class homosexuals to be themselves and out without issue or backlash.

When the rebuttal of “why would I choose to live a harder, more oppressed life if I could choose to be straight” is no longer applicable because we’ve made that much progress, it’ll be tempting for bigots to pretend that people are coin flip choosing this life.

Of course, that won’t do shit against the other great counter of “when exactly did you choose to be straight, Mr. Closet Case”. But then, I didn’t say it would be a smart tactic, just a more popular one.

They have to suppress the natural purposes of their body to do what many, if not most, people viscerally know is wrong.

Huh, and here I was thinking that it was my decision to stop suppressing the natural reality of my body and its visceral knowledge of what was wrong that lead me to acknowledging my transsexuality, but now I know better.

Thanks, delusional closet case!

That suppression of the inner voice of conscience then imperialistically seeks to silence outer voices of others – bakers, florists, Christian churches and web-pages, rational ethicists, anyone who dares to remind them of the choice they made.

Another true fact. Every time a queer person sees a straight coupling, they lose their shit like an angry gorilla, flipping over tables and stomping on Valentine’s candy boxes. A friend of mine made the mistake of inviting a gay friend to their straight wedding once… they never were able to get the blood off the walls.

Also, I’m not sure there is a way to read this and not hear the giant IT’S ALWAYS PROJECTION where closeted self-hating queers try and destroy anything that could ever remind them that it was a choice to repress themselves in a marriage they despise instead of being true to themselves.

Hell, fuck the LGBT focus, that might as well be the national slogan for the conservative movement. I mean, look no further than the obsession over the Summer of Love. So many conservative squares, pissed and bitter that they missed out on “all the hippie chick pussy” of Woodstock taking it out on anything they see as even remotely reminding them of what they passed up.

It’s okay, bigots, no one fits in your goddamn boxes, so why don’t you fucking chill and be true to yourselves for once in your fucking life.

Hence “gay rights” can only extend at the cost of the freedom of others.

Christians in America, then, must awake. Their very liberty is at stake. The wheels of persecution are already in motion. Already they are being prohibited, in many states, from living their faith in the marketplace. Those wheels won’t stop grinding when they get to the doors of the church. We, the spiritual descendants of those who crossed an ocean so we could worship the Lord freely, are now seeing the dark clouds of oppression gathering over us. It’s time for “the people who know their God [to] stand firm and take action” (Daniel 11:32).

I mean, under such fascist commie oppressor alien invaders, the only solution is violence. We’re not oppressors smacking down anything that smacks of “difference”. We’re protecting ourselves against a menace to our very way of life and in defense of our freedoms against a threat that would eliminate us completely if we were to let them.

Oh, no, I wasn’t translating for you. I was translating for that nice KKK member from the late 19th century.

Honestly, you think you would have noticed by now that gay rights is completely different than civil rights.


‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. And we’re only going more obscure from here, folks. Hey, I’ll go back to mocking the “big names” when they learn a second fucking word. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™

*Fun fact: When I hit puberty, the dominant model of straight sexuality was so beaten into me, I ended up doing a comprehensive tour of all the porn of the internet, because, hey, I have to be attracted to something, right? So it isn’t like many of us of non-normative sexuality didn’t fucking try to be “normal” before we finally found the language that actually described us and the self-confidence to stop “trying” and just accept ourselves as we were.

**I mean, we used to think it was that Harvey Milk guy, but…

128 Comments »

  1. Smut Clyde said,

    November 14, 2013 at 14:06

    on that whole racial minority being visually obvious thing

    …bringing us back to the vexed question, Are Finns really European?

  2. Major Kong said,

    November 14, 2013 at 14:19

    This food is terrible! And the portions are so small!

  3. Michael Søndberg Olsen said,

    November 14, 2013 at 15:25

    Seriously, what the hell Oregon? Say you’re right. So what?. Maybe LGBT issues is not what you’re most politically focused on. Fine. Mine wouldn’t be either, being straight as a slightly crooked post. But while it may not impact me on a “personal” level, it does impact me on an actual personal level, since I have people in my life it impacts whom I love. You could just say: “hey, this isn’t my focus, I’m more concerned about this or that aspect of politics.”. But why the hell do you get petty and snippy about it?

  4. The Dark God of Time, AKA DA® said,

    November 14, 2013 at 15:41

    I’ve never known a troll with such galactic-level butthurt over what someone on a librul snark blog decides to post about.

  5. El Manquécito said,

    November 14, 2013 at 15:50

    Are Finns really European?

    Do Finns eat herring? QED.

  6. Michael Søndberg Olsen said,

    November 14, 2013 at 16:38

    “Do Finns eat herring? QED.”

    Fuck if I know. I certainly don’t, but then ich bin ein Berliner, since I’m a nice piece of Danish.

  7. Matt said,

    November 14, 2013 at 18:18

    Always find it hilarious that the people shrieking about “OMG GAYS SHOULDN’T HAVE RIGHTS IT’S A CHOICE” forget that picking which imaginary friend to listen to is *definitely* a choice.

    If we followed their logic and started cracking down on “deviant” belief systems that help drive people to irrational, immoral, and/or violent acts, the churches would be the FIRST thing to go…

  8. bbkf said,

    November 14, 2013 at 18:25

    picking which imaginary friend to listen to is *definitely* a choice.

    blasphemer! i have driven across this great country of ours many times and have seen the ‘jesus is lord and god over xburg’ many times…it’s not a choice, it’s a fact…

  9. jim the heretical anti-cliff lemming said,

    November 14, 2013 at 18:54

    Civil rights as a zero sum game = you are DOING IT WRNOG.

    Anybody think that the moment some lab isolates a “gay gene” in our genome that these atavistic douchebags won’t be funding 24/7 research to neutralize that little sucker? Bet on it – they’ll drop the “lifestyle choice” hokum lock stock & barrel faster than you can say “prenatal eugenics is part of God’s Plan.”

    Christians were indeed oppressed by the Roman Empire, by being made to pay a “Heathen Tax” for not getting right with Zeus, Athena & the Olympus Posse … but Christians in America today actually get the exact opposite deal: their churches get an automatic “Religion Rebate” in the form of a full 100% tax credit … & televangelists have the mansions & yachts to prove it. I can only dream of living with such a wonderful bonus of “oppression.”

    But boy oh boy, it’s obvious that all those awful non-heteros are really SUPER-DUPER-EVIL … I mean, after a history of literal millennia of non-stop anti-gay imprisonment, torture & murder, with a body count well into the millions, just look at all the reprisal killings they’re perpetrating right now in … uh, in …

  10. VCarlson said,

    November 14, 2013 at 19:10

    Civil rights as a zero sum game = you are DOING IT WRNOG.

    For thee and me, and the rest of humanity, they are. But I’m pretty sure he and his fellow-travelers define their happiness by what they can do and others can’t. By that definition, it is a zero sum game. I feel sorry for the minginess of their lives, and profoundly angry that they’re working so hard to make the rest of us live in their miserble world.

  11. Pupienus said,

    November 14, 2013 at 19:27

    If I don’t get a hat tip I am SO going to AHEM the fuck out of this!

  12. Pupienus said,

    November 14, 2013 at 19:31

    I said AHEM sir!

  13. VCarlson said,

    November 14, 2013 at 19:38

    If I don’t get a hat tip I am SO going to AHEM the fuck out of this!

    I was assuming, while reading Cerb’s post, that that’s where she got her source.

  14. Pupienus said,

    November 14, 2013 at 19:39

    Some of them have been forced out of business. [citation needed]

  15. Pupienus said,

    November 14, 2013 at 19:40

    Seriously, what the hell Oregon?

    Did I miss something?

  16. El Manquécito said,

    November 14, 2013 at 19:42

    Did I miss something?

    Nothing but the usual trollage.

  17. tsam said,

    November 14, 2013 at 19:45

    Some of them have been forced out of business. and into chains, and fed to lions and gladiators for the entertainment of the rubes as a part of an image repair campaign by ineffectual dictators…

    Yes, that’s exactly what’s happening.

  18. tsam said,

    November 14, 2013 at 19:47

    Anybody think that the moment some lab isolates a “gay gene” in our genome that these atavistic douchebags won’t be funding 24/7 research to neutralize that little sucker? Bet on it – they’ll drop the “lifestyle choice” hokum lock stock & barrel faster than you can say “prenatal eugenics is part of God’s Plan.”

    Their “under no circumstances” opposition to abortion would likely change if such a gene was isolated.

  19. tsam said,

    November 14, 2013 at 19:50

    What would be awesome is if they did find that “homo gene”, and it turned out to be a recessive or chance occurring genetic factor we all share. I suspect that this is the case, though I have zero proof beyond my own very limited understanding of genetics.

  20. Pupienus said,

    November 14, 2013 at 20:01

    It’s likely not a single gene and epigenetics plays a large role.

  21. Pupienus said,

    November 14, 2013 at 20:07

    Their “under no circumstances” opposition to abortion would likely change if such a gene was isolated.

    There’s a pretty decent book series that incorporates the idea. Post discovery the only gays are Catholic because only the Catholics won’t abort.

    https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/257991.The_Gumshoe_the_Witch_and_the_Virtual_Corpse

  22. tsam said,

    November 14, 2013 at 20:07

    But a gene all us hoomunz have, nonetheless, meaning there isn’t likely a single determining factor involved, nor is it likely that isolating the underlying causes is possible–I hope.

  23. Cerberus said,

    November 14, 2013 at 20:20

    Pupienus-

    Hat tip.

  24. tigris said,

    November 14, 2013 at 20:53

    With every expansion of “gay rights” comes a loss of freedom for others, particularly those who, whether for religious or purely rational reasons, refuse to acknowledge the functional and moral equivalency of homosexuality.

    I don’t buy that it’s zero-sum in the first place, but even if it were why should the “freedom” to escape consequences of behavior considered unacceptable by the majority of people only work one way? I mean, folks getting treated like pariahs used to be fine with you, now that it’s you it’s no longer fair? Boo. Hoo.

    there have been at least 11 instances of Christian business people facing threats, boycotts, protests, and the intervention of state or judicial authorities

    ELEVEN! Holy crap, I had NO IDEA it was so bad. So, how many of those were purely boycott/protests? Because surely you’re not claiming the right to force people to go to businesses or to agree with somebody or remain silent, right? Right?

    Some of them have been forced out of business.

    What fraction of those eleven were forced out of business? And was it by government action or by loss of business because people availed themselves of the freedom to go elsewhere?

    Hebrews 10:34 describes one of the first types of persecution encountered by the early church as the “plundering” or confiscation of their property (Hebrews 10:34). The Roman Empire squeezed Christians economically. Now the United States, as a direct result of the rise of “gay rights”, is seeing just that kind of persecution.

    Again, how many of the eleven had their businesses seized by the government?

    Always find it hilarious that the people shrieking about “OMG GAYS SHOULDN’T HAVE RIGHTS IT’S A CHOICE” forget that picking which imaginary friend to listen to is *definitely* a choice.

    Yes, but you can totally tell by looking in the mirror so IT’S DIFFERENT.

    Actually, the funny thing is it’s not only a choice, it’s an unnatural one; there are plenty of examples of the homosex in nature, not so many evangelical animules though.

  25. tsam said,

    November 14, 2013 at 21:04

    PROTIP for the xtian creepshow:

    If you call something a zero sum game, you have to show the math. Your math indicates that some businesses have been boycotted or protested (like an abortion clinic), but it doesn’t show where you’ve lost an actual liberty.

    See, you never had the freedom to suppress the freedom of others.

    For some reason, all you religious fundamentalist zealots think that freedom is yours to give or take. It’s not. The right to marry DOES NOT BELONG TO YOU. Ok? Figure it out, window lickers.

  26. Pupienus said,

    November 14, 2013 at 21:06

    Hebrews 10:34 describes one of the first types of persecution encountered by the early church as the “plundering” or confiscation of their property (Hebrews 10:34). The Roman Empire squeezed Christians economically. Now the United States, as a direct result of the rise of “gay rights”, is seeing just that kind of persecution.
    .

    Is Hebrews where Jesus says “render unto Caesar that which is Caesar’s”?

  27. Pupienus said,

    November 14, 2013 at 21:11

    To reprise a comment I made at an atheism site wherein someone was helpfully telling us we shouldn’t Matthew 6:6 anyone: Ahh, an interpretation that justifies doing exactly what the book says you should NOT do. Never seen Christians do that before.

  28. Pupienus said,

    November 14, 2013 at 21:13

    Gee thanx Cerb. o_o

  29. Substance McGravitas said,

    November 14, 2013 at 21:40

    Pastor John is apparently a Calvinist. I confess I did not know until now about this particular version of total depravity.

  30. DataSnake said,

    November 14, 2013 at 21:43

    Borderline off-topic, but this is bugging me. I recognize Pocahontas, but who’s the other woman in that picture?

  31. Shakezula said,

    November 14, 2013 at 22:23

    Almighty God created the races white, black, yellow, malay and red, and he placed them on separate continents. And but for the interference with his arrangement there would be no cause for such marriages. The fact that he separated the races shows that he did not intend for the races to mix.

  32. Helmut Monotreme said,

    November 14, 2013 at 22:26

    If one’s god didn’t want races to mix, and now, despite his alleged wishes there they go mixing like crazy, the term ‘Almighty’ doesn’t seem to apply.

  33. tigris said,

    November 14, 2013 at 22:26

    That person doesn’t know much geography…

  34. Major Kong said,

    November 14, 2013 at 22:32

    The fact that he separated the races shows that he did not intend for the races to mix.

    There was an old episode of All In The Family where Sammie Davis Jr. was having this exact same conversation with Archie Bunker.

    Sammie Davis Jr. said -

    “Well he must have told somebody because they came and got us.”

  35. Shakezula said,

    November 14, 2013 at 22:53

    Sorry, that was the trial judge’s decision in Loving v. Virginia. As we all know, the Supreme Court disagreed.

  36. Pupienus said,

    November 14, 2013 at 23:39

    I follow this shit kind of closely – because fags and religion are my hobby, y’know Pennis – and I am unaware of anyone who has had to close their business. There are indeed cases of the proprietors being hit with discrimination suits because IT’S AGAINST THE FUCKING LAW. There’s one case I know of (in Gresham, just a bit of a ride on “the crime train” out to Gresham) where they shuttered their storefront but did not shut down the catering business. There is also at least one case of people closing the business BECAUSE THEY WOULD RATHER CLOSE THAN SERVE ICKY FAGS which they ould have to do IF THEY WERE OBEYING THE LAW.

  37. The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge said,

    November 14, 2013 at 23:40

    Pupienus said,
    November 14, 2013 at 20:01

    It’s likely not a single gene and epigenetics plays a large role.

    It’s The Green Gene I want to suddenly pop out.

  38. VCarlson said,

    November 15, 2013 at 0:11

    FYI, according to my local paper, it looks as though the anti gay marriage folks in HI are SOL:

    Judge rules against gay marriage opponents
    Circuit Court Judge Karl Sakamoto ruled today against same-sex marriage opponents and refused to issue a temporary restraining order to prevent the state from granting marriage licenses to gay couples starting on Dec. 2.

    Part of what they were objecting to (or, in my opinion, one of the excuses they were using) was the requirement that if your religious institution offers services (like hall rental, catering, etc) to the general public, that means everyone. No exceptions for personal ickiness. Your church do’wanna cater gay marriages? Fine. Offer catering services only to members of your church. I got no problems with that. Of course, my Meeting’s already done at least one same-sex marriage (unfortunately with the understanding that it wasn’t a legal marriage) in the past year or two.

  39. Smut Clyde said,

    November 15, 2013 at 0:15

    the moment some lab isolates a “gay gene” in our genome
    You know it’s real because it’s been discovered so many times.

    The fact that he separated the races shows that he did not intend for the races to mix.
    It’s strange how few pro-racism American preachers conclude that God intended white peoples to stay in Europe because that’s where He put their dumb honkie butts.

  40. Pupienus said,

    November 15, 2013 at 0:16

    Speaking of marriage and religion and shit, I totally missed this shocking event.

  41. Pupienus said,

    November 15, 2013 at 0:20

    The Green Gene Man, that book completely fell into my cranial bit bucket.

  42. bbkf said,

    November 15, 2013 at 0:23

    While we did not “know” each other in a Biblical sense, it was nevertheless inappropriately romantic and affectionate.

    so it was just blow jobs and holding hands?

  43. Pupienus said,

    November 15, 2013 at 0:28

    so it was just blow jobs and holding hands?

    Saddlebacking, possibly.

  44. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    November 15, 2013 at 0:31

    The Green Gene Man, that book completely fell into my cranial bit bucket.

    When did they made a book about Mr. Green Jeans from the Captain Kangaroo show?

  45. tsam said,

    November 15, 2013 at 0:34

    Know each other in the biblical sense…that’s so DUMB

    It’s called fucking or humping or mounting up or shagging or knocking boots or bumping uglies, k?

    Putting the bible in there just makes it weird.

  46. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    November 15, 2013 at 0:35

    Putting the bible in there just makes it weird.

    And unless it’s a small pocket bible, quite uncomfortable.

  47. Substance McGravitas said,

    November 15, 2013 at 0:42

    There are some luxurious bibles out there.

  48. The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge said,

    November 15, 2013 at 0:43

    Putting the bible in there just makes it weird.

    And unless it’s a small pocket bible, quite uncomfortable.

    Million-dollar idea: We feed mayonnaise to the tuna fish…sorry, wrong one: Condoms with bible verses printed on them! It can’t lose, right?

  49. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    November 15, 2013 at 0:48

    Condoms with bible verses printed on them! It can’t lose, right?

    Genius! It simply must be topped with a little “crown of thorns” (for her pleasure™©®).

  50. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    November 15, 2013 at 0:49

    Obligatory PENIS.

  51. Smut Clyde said,

    November 15, 2013 at 1:04

    Condoms with bible verses printed on them!
    The way of an eagle in the air; the way of a serpent upon a rock; the way of a ship in the midst of the sea; and the way of a man with a maid.

    You have to admit, that all sounds more romantic than “doggy-style”.

  52. Smut Clyde said,

    November 15, 2013 at 1:13

    The Green Gene
    Haven’t read that. Is good? I rate for Dickinson’s Changes Trilogy.

    Condoms with bible verses printed on them!
    Which of you by taking thought can add one cubit unto his stature?

  53. nihilistech said,

    November 15, 2013 at 2:37

    Yay Team Dresch reference in the title.

  54. nihilistech said,

    November 15, 2013 at 2:41

    FyWP…

    This should be the encore.

  55. Thread Bear said,

    November 15, 2013 at 3:07

    A bad idea!

    http://www.bizjournals.com/sanfrancisco/blog/2013/11/jpmorgan-chase-bank-twitter-askjpmorgan.html

  56. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    November 15, 2013 at 3:20

    Condoms with bible verses printed on them!

    Then she saddled an ass, and said to her servant, drive and go forward; slack not thy riding for me, except I bid thee.

  57. The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge said,

    November 15, 2013 at 3:52

    So is Faux Noise covering the Rob Ford debacle? You know they’d just love to put a (D) next to his name, but probably think even their viewers aren’t that stupid. Personally, I think they’re wrong.

  58. Smut Clyde said,

    November 15, 2013 at 3:59

    And it came to pass, when he went in unto his brother's wife, that he spilled it on the ground, lest that he should give seed to his brother.

  59. The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge said,

    November 15, 2013 at 4:08

    The Green Gene
    Haven’t read that. Is good? I rate for Dickinson’s Changes Trilogy.

    To be honest, it’s been nearly 40 years since I read it, so I don’t remember much. Funny how memory works—I can picture the exact shelf in the library I picked it up from (three buildings ago!), but just a few disconnected mental images from the book itself.

  60. Pupienus said,

    November 15, 2013 at 4:19

    Won a Nebula or Hugo or maybe a Campbell award, dinnit?

  61. Pupienus said,

    November 15, 2013 at 4:20

    Not that it necessarily means it’s a good book.

  62. Bitter Scribe said,

    November 15, 2013 at 4:20

    I think this guy’s letting black people off too easy. Sure, they didn’t choose to be black, but it was their choice to go outside where white people could see them.

  63. Pupienus said,

    November 15, 2013 at 4:20

    I’m talking about Green Gene, not the bibble, just to be clear.

  64. Failure Artist said,

    November 15, 2013 at 4:34

    In “Straight: The Surprisingly Short History of Heterosexuality”, the author points out we have found the straight gene yet.

  65. Pupienus said,

    November 15, 2013 at 5:19

    Busy day so I’m just throwing together boeuf Bourgingon. Thank FSM for pressure cookers! But we have no potatoes and I just don’t feel like making fresh pasta so imma make some quick easy Serviettenknödel mit kraüter. Hope it’s ebidle.

  66. rodert rudis said,

    November 15, 2013 at 5:21

    Doctor German, is that the gay gene?
    Vhich vone, this vone, the vittle shaky one?
    Yes, Doctor, that one, the one that won’t stop moving.
    Yes, that’s our vittle friend, the dancer ve call him. Like John Travolta, always ‘a dancing.
    Who would have thought that….my my. What’s this fellow here, with the hat on?
    Oh, you noticed the hat too! That’s Clint, avfter Rowdy Yates, bevore your time I suppose….
    Clint Eastwood! I see it now, the Clint Eastwood gene! Marvelous!
    Ves, ves, that’s him. Sometime he has a cigar, smoke you see…
    I do see the smoke! This is amazing Doctor German, genes as movie stars, brilliant!
    Ve think so.

  67. Thread Bear said,

    November 15, 2013 at 6:33

    Genes as movie stars? Wouldn’t the one that won’t stop moving, the dancing gene, be Gene Kelly?

  68. Chris said,

    November 15, 2013 at 7:18

    I love the fact that they’re now approvingly talking about civil rights as something that totally had no consequences of any kind, the civil rights marchers were paragons of deference to American society and all, doncha know.

    Of course they’re only praising them in order to better knock down the gay rights crowd. But it’s still funny to read, considering the plethora of arguments about how the Civil Rights Act and Voting Rights Act were unconstitutional, and led to affirmative action and other oppressive and discriminatory and anti-white things.

  69. M.C. Simon Milligan said,

    November 15, 2013 at 8:29

    … the pages of the Bible are quite clear that “in Christ there is no Jew nor Greek” (Gal. 2:28) …

    That’s actually Galatians 3:28. I’ve got to wonder if the mis-attribution is intentional since the rest of the passage reads “… ,there is neither bond nor free, there is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus.”

    (Queue the Takei voice) Oh my!

    Hebrews 10:34 describes one of the first types of persecution encountered by the early church as the “plundering” or confiscation of their property. The Roman Empire squeezed Christians economically.

    Um, in the book of HEBREWS the persecution referred to was by Jewish authorities for religious reasons. Do these people even fucking read the damn things they cite!?

  70. Smut Clyde said,

    November 15, 2013 at 12:27

    Do these people even fucking read the damn things they cite!?

    Since Hebrews 10:34 commends the recipients of the letter for (a) reacting so positively to the loss of what after all are unimportant, earthly possessions, so not dwelling on the dispossession, and (b) treating it as a Learning Experience to increase their understanding of other marginalised subjects of state prosecution and imprisonment… I’m guessing that No, they don’t.
    Or they read them but don’t understand them.

  71. Major Kong said,

    November 15, 2013 at 13:51

    If you’re not happy here, Red State’s down the hall, on the far right.

  72. boconn13 said,

    November 15, 2013 at 14:20

    I thought it was figs that Jesus hated.

  73. Austin Loomis said,

    November 15, 2013 at 14:57

    Dear Liberal Lemming:

    When you get near a point of some sort, please let me know.

    aTdhvaannkcse.

  74. Austin Loomis said,

    November 15, 2013 at 15:04

    Ears are tender, Dennis. I had this lesson literally pounded into me at the age of about 10 when, after my umpteenth viewing of the Schoolhouse Rock song “Electricity, E-lec-tricity”, I took the song’s advice to sneak up on (in this case) my kindly, not-yet-gray-haired mother and zap her on the ear. She slapped the taste out of my mouth and pointed out that ears are tender. I never pulled such a stunt again.

    And yet, pigs’ ears have considerably more torque than human ears.

  75. The Dark God of Time, AKA DA® said,

    November 15, 2013 at 17:13

    Obamacare just cut Oregon’s uninsured rate by 10%

    Though the Oregon’s health insurance exchange is not yet up and running, the number of uninsured is already dropping thanks to new fast-track enrollment for the Oregon Health Plan.

    The low-income, Medicaid-funded program has already signed up 56,000 new people, cutting the state’s number of uninsured by 10 percent, according to Oregon Health Authority officials.

    Though the new exchange called Cover Oregon was originally intended to be used for Oregon Health Plan enrollment, the online marketplace doesn’t work yet. Instead, new Oregon Health Plan members are being enrolled using a fast-track process that was approved by the federal government in August.

    This might come as a surprise to the health wonks who have followed Oregon, and watched the state delay consumers’ ability to access the marketplace directly on day one. Officials at the state exchange, Cover Oregon, worried that initial glitches would trip up shoppers.

    “When Google launched Gmail, you had to be invited,” spokeswoman Amy Fauver told me a while back. “That was their beta launch. That was their way to identify bugs. Our benefit is that our initial users will be community partners who will be trained on the system.”

    At the same time, the state has a governor who is obsessed with the Medicaid program (you can read more about that here). Oregon is among one of the 26 states planning to expand Medicaid–and it made sure that those eligible knew about the option.

    “Since late September, the Oregon Health Authority sent out notices to 260,000 people already enrolled in the state’s food stamps program since late October,” Budnick writes. “To enroll, all they have to do is make a phone call or send a form consenting to be enrolled. So far, 56,000 people have done that, coming on top of more than 600,000 already enrolled.”

    http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/wonkblog/wp/2013/10/17/obamacare-just-cut-oregons-uninsured-rate-by-10-percent/?print=1

    Thanks for nothing, Obamacare!

  76. bbkf said,

    November 15, 2013 at 17:57

    the civil rights marchers were paragons of deference to American society and all, doncha know.

    i like how he totes ignores how awful things were for blacks before they oh, so politely asked to be treated like human beings…if people actually followed what the bible teaches AND follows anti-discrimination laws, teh gheys wouldn’t have to be crass enough to have to ask for equal treatment…

  77. bbkf said,

    November 15, 2013 at 17:58

    Do these people even fucking read the damn things they cite!?

    they do…it’s just that the voices in their heads misinterpret them…

  78. Pupienus Maximus said,

    November 15, 2013 at 18:24

    Given that the guy has masters degrees in divinity and theology (I haven’t found out for sure what his doctorate is) and is a pastor, and also that he appears to have a habit of hit-and-run feuding at religious sites – he has a pennis-like obsession with attacking Orthodox Xianity – I’m going to go with “has read.” And is knowingly quoting in the wrong context. Shocking, innit.

  79. st.jim, Patron Saint Of Pointing & Laughing said,

    November 15, 2013 at 20:27

    10: KEY F5
    20: KEY F5
    30: KEY F5
    40: LOLOLOLOLOL
    50: GOTO 10

  80. Major Kong said,

    November 15, 2013 at 20:45

    Do these people even fucking read the damn things they cite!?

    They do, but they sit around in Bible Study and all agree on the “approved” interpretation. They may not have a papacy but they’re replaced it with a form of group-think.

  81. Substance McGravitas said,

    November 15, 2013 at 21:00

    Pat Buchanan is at war with The Pope:

    The cultural revolution preached by Marxist Antonio Gramsci is continuing its “long march” through the institutions of the West and succeeding where the violent revolutions of Lenin and Mao failed. It is effecting a transvaluation of all values. And it is not interested in a truce with the church of Pope Francis, but a triumph over that church which it reviles as the great enemy in its struggle.

    Indeed, after decades of culture war waged against Christianity, the Vatican might consider the state of the Faith.

    Our civilization is being de-Christianized. Popular culture is a running sewer. Promiscuity and pornography are pandemic. In Europe, the churches empty out as the mosques fill up. In America, Bible reading and prayer are outlawed in schools, as Christian displays are purged from public squares. Officially, Christmas and Easter do not exist.

  82. tsam said,

    November 15, 2013 at 21:09

    Pat really needs to switch to decaf.

    And get some medication. Definitely medication.

  83. bbkf said,

    November 15, 2013 at 21:15

    Pat Buchanan is at war with The Pope:

    where does pat live? here, in the shelter of my all-white enclave, one cannot swing a dead cat OR shake a stick without coming into contact with christianity and/or religious symbology and what not…also, he’s clearly NOT on facebook because the christians have a very strong presence there…

  84. Substance McGravitas said,

    November 15, 2013 at 21:19

    also, he’s clearly NOT on facebook because the christians have a very strong presence there…

    He is checking to see if the internet still has pornography.

  85. bbkf said,

    November 15, 2013 at 21:22

    He is checking to see if the internet still has pornography.

    it’s good that he takes a hands-on approach with that iykwimaityd…

  86. Smut Clyde said,

    November 15, 2013 at 21:37

    And get some medication. Definitely medication.

    What’s good for acute alliteration?

  87. Major Kong said,

    November 15, 2013 at 21:40

    He is checking to see if the internet still has pornography.

    I may need to research this. In the name of, you know, science.

  88. Pupienus said,

    November 15, 2013 at 21:58

    What’s good for acute alliteration?

    Sibilant serum.

  89. VCarlson said,

    November 15, 2013 at 21:59

    From Substance McGravitas’ November 15, 2013 at 21:00 quote of Pat Buchanan, I have a few remarks to make.

    Our civilization is being de-Christianized. 

    About time.

    Popular culture is a running sewer. 

    Old farts have been saying this for millennia. Got anything new to add?

    Promiscuity and pornography are pandemic.

    People have also been screwing outside the bounds of matrimony for millennia. The only difference is that nowadays it’s not quite so likely that the woman (and only the woman) will pay with her life. I think that’s the part that has ol’ Pat’s knickers in a twist. As for the pornography, I just wish it didn’t give people for whom it’s their first instruction in sexuality such a fucked up view of it.

     In Europe, the churches empty out as the mosques fill up.

    And I can guess which part of that sentence he really hates.

    In America, Bible reading and prayer are outlawed in schools, as Christian displays are purged from public squares. 

    And how would you feel, Pat, if the only public religious displays were from some religion other than your own?

    Officially, Christmas and Easter do not exist.

    They exist a lot more officially than, say, Eid. What are you bitching about?

  90. bbkf said,

    November 15, 2013 at 22:07

    They exist a lot more officially than, say, Eid. What are you bitching about?

    you crack me up, v…

    one thing that strikes me (and i’m going ot here) in listening to raydio and teevee lately is that obama did promise that if you liked your current health care plan, you could keep that plan…how many people actually liked their shitty plans? i know i certainly did not like paying over $400/month with a ridiculously high deductible so that i’m still paying all my costs out of pocket…but that could just be me…anyhow, he technically didn’t lie with that one…and the low numbers signing up? one thing i’ve learned as an event planner is that most people do not sign up for anything until the day before the fucking deadline…and then there’s still a bunch that want to sign up after THAT…so, whatEVER…

  91. tsam said,

    November 15, 2013 at 23:11

    how many people actually liked their shitty plans?

    I wonder how many people were dumb enough to believe that “you can keep it” horseshit. Apparently a whole bunch of ‘em.

    The PPA made most plans obsolete. The fact that some companies don’t want to continue covering some people or comply with regulations is the fault of their accounting department, not HUSSEIN Obama.

  92. tsam said,

    November 15, 2013 at 23:12

    I’ll say this: When Obama said that, I thought to myself “oh shit, he’s gonna regret that”.

  93. bbkf said,

    November 15, 2013 at 23:16

    The fact that some companies don’t want to continue covering some people or comply with regulations is the fault of their accounting department, not HUSSEIN Obama.

    true…

    I’ll say this: When Obama said that, I thought to myself “oh shit, he’s gonna regret that”.

    doubly true…

    for such an intelligent man, he makes some pretty dumb mistakes…

  94. Pupienus said,

    November 15, 2013 at 23:20

    how many people actually liked their shitty plans?

    Companies Use Obamacare Confusion To Sell ‘Junk Insurance’

  95. Failure Artist said,

    November 15, 2013 at 23:22

    Christmas doesn’t exist anymore? Then why are all the stores selling Christmas stuff?

  96. Substance McGravitas said,

    November 15, 2013 at 23:32

    If you listen closely, she’s really saying KISS ASS.

  97. Major Kong said,

    November 15, 2013 at 23:33

    Pat seems to desperately require validation of his faith from the government.

  98. tsam said,

    November 15, 2013 at 23:36

    for such an intelligent man, he makes some pretty dumb mistakes…

    Actually, it was pure politics. If you parse the real meaning, you could say that if your employer plan conforms to the law, nothing is really going to change for you, aside from hopefully reduced contributions and less cost to the small employers. That doesn’t make for a very good sound clip.

    Obama does say some fairly dumb things, but compared to Louie Gohmert? Gohmert comes across as the kind of person who is a huge danger to himself with knives or any poisonous chemical.

  99. tsam said,

    November 15, 2013 at 23:37

    Officially, Christmas and Easter do not exist.

    So I guess all federal workers will be working Christmas day then.

  100. bbkf said,

    November 15, 2013 at 23:45

    Actually, it was pure politics. If you parse the real meaning, you could say that if your employer plan conforms to the law, nothing is really going to change for you, aside from hopefully reduced contributions and less cost to the small employers. That doesn’t make for a very good sound clip.

    that’s what i always took it to mean, but yeah, i suppose it didn’t sound sexy enough or whatever…i really, really wish he would have went that route though…

    Obama does say some fairly dumb things, but compared to Louie Gohmert? Gohmert comes across as the kind of person who is a huge danger to himself with knives or any poisonous chemical.

    i think his words haven’t been too dumb…there’s only a couple of things that have made me literally cringe, but his decisions have been less than spectacular a lot of the time…

  101. Substance McGravitas said,

    November 15, 2013 at 23:46

    A kook left some nonsense at my place, so I visited his place.

    ARE CREED BOOKS GOD’S WORD?

  102. bbkf said,

    November 15, 2013 at 23:46

    also, too…although many have tried, nobody but nobody can sound as dumb as louie gohmert…

  103. Daphne said,

    November 16, 2013 at 0:04

    P.S: A friend emails: “Obama’s KATRINA. A little dramatic?” Maybe. Obama’s record on “affordable housing,” as described in the Globe story, isn’t a case of gross ineptitude in a catastrophic regional emergency. It’s not even a symbol of endemic governmental dysfunction. (Although: Is there a bigger Petri dish for corrupt incompetence than the “public-private partnership”?THINK CABE TV FRANCHISES.) But the Globe account does seem to capture what’s most likely to be wrong with an Obama administration.
    –Mickey Kaus at Slate, 6/30/08

    More “think” goodies as I come across them.

  104. Pupienus said,

    November 16, 2013 at 0:11

    ARE CREED BOOKS GOD’S WORD?

    Thank FSM that’s not what I was expecting. I mean, some people are rumored to like CREED but gawd’s word?!?!?

  105. Pupienus said,

    November 16, 2013 at 0:13

    Ah, classic Mickey Kaus from earlier in his goat blowing days.

  106. The Dark God of Time, AKA DA® said,

    November 16, 2013 at 0:53

    This is good advice to Mayor Rob Ford:

    Asked to comment about the scandal while filming “Scary Movie 6” in the city this week, Sheen reportedly told a journalist, “I hate to pass judement on anybody, especially given my history. But I’ve been seeing those videos on the news, and I think it’s fair to say that Rob Ford parties too much. I can honestly tell you I’ve never been that high.

    “There was this one time in Vegas when I took four Victoria’s Secret models and did one gram off each of their bodies within, like, 45 minutes. I declared myself King of Vegas and decided to remodel my hotel room with my bare hands to resemble King Louis XIV’s bedroom at Versailles. Knocked down two entire walls, and later had four knuckle surgeries. Still wasn’t as high as Rob Ford.”

    http://blog.sfgate.com/dailydish/2013/11/15/charlie-sheen-reaches-out-to-toronto-mayor-following-news-report/

  107. Major Kong said,

    November 16, 2013 at 1:21

    You know it’s bad when you’re getting sobriety tips from Charlie Sheen.

  108. Chris said,

    November 16, 2013 at 1:25

    Our civilization is being de-Christianized.

    No it’s not. Christianity is simply having all of its teeth pulled out, which is to say, it is increasingly being denied the ability to coerce people. Can’t just pass sweeping laws regulating people’s lifestyles and point to the Bible for justification. Can’t impose your religion on people who don’t share it. Can’t have a monopoly on welfare anymore that allows you to coerce people along “want to eat tonight? Then you’d better sit through this sermon!” lines. Can’t use the government as a megaphone.

    Your ability to preach remains undiminished. If you want to turn everyone Christian (or “Christian,” a.k.a. your specific sub-sub-sub-denomination), you totally can. But you’re going to have to do it one person at a time by going up to them and convincing them that they should be Christian rather than putting a (metaphorical or, all too often, real) gun to their head.

    If your gospel is so self-evident and awesome, should be no trouble at all. Now quit your bitching and get to work.

  109. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    November 16, 2013 at 1:58

    A kook left some nonsense at my place, so I visited his place.

    I thought you were talking about me for a minute.

  110. Substance McGravitas said,

    November 16, 2013 at 4:29

    The only thing worse than being talked about…

  111. The Dark God of Time, AKA DA® said,

    November 16, 2013 at 4:36

    Is being compared to a stream of bat piss.

  112. Tacitus, circa 104 A.D. said,

    November 16, 2013 at 4:55

    Popular culture is a running sewer.

    Promiscuity & pornography are pandemic.

  113. The Dark God of Time, AKA DA® said,

    November 16, 2013 at 5:28

    A lot of violent, insolent youth back then:

    Psychopathic Violence

    From an early age, Alcibiades was gifted with amazing physical prowess, which he made a point of abusing. For example, as a teenager, he decided one day he felt like reading some Homer (this was much cooler in ancient Greece). He found a schoolteacher and asked him for a copy. When the teacher said he didn’t have anything of Homer’s, the young Alcibiades promptly punched him out and walked away.

    http://www.cracked.com/funny-5516-alcibiades/

  114. Smut Clyde said,

    November 16, 2013 at 6:57

    Tacitus, circa 104 A.D. said,
    Popular culture is a running sewer.

    The real Tacitus would have said ‘cloaca’.

  115. The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge said,

    November 16, 2013 at 8:00

    I knew Tacitus. Tacitus was a friend of mine….

  116. Sondra said,

    November 16, 2013 at 9:08

    Actually the old biblical laws do mention abortion. The laws regarding the murder of a pregnant woman specified that a fetus was not viable before 40 weeks and therefore the crime would only be one murder not two. According to Jewish custom if a pregnancy had to be terminated because of rape and/or because it endangered the life of the mother – that could be done safely during those 40 weeks and with no penalties attached.
    The codification of 613 laws was separate from the actual torah (bible) but it was based on the concept that the commandments were “written in stone”.
    Only modern Christians limit their acceptance to the first 10 of them.
    Every last detail of the covenant between the people of Israel and the Lord was codified and that included the proper treatment of ones slaves and which part and how much of each field was allocated to the poor. None of it was optional or open to debate.
    One very important law called for a Jubilee year every 10 years: in those years every debt no matter how big or how small was to be forgiven so that no one was forced to carry on paying off a debt forever.
    It was strictly forbidden to take a person’s last warm garment in the winter in order to collect on a debt as well: the punishments were terrible and harsh, but the intent of many laws was to be just and fair especially to widows, children and the poor.

  117. Smut Clyde said,

    November 16, 2013 at 9:36

    Popular culture is a running sewer

    I am now singing this to the tune of Ultravox’s “Fear in the Western World”. The Frau Doktorin is looking worried.

  118. Whale Chowder said,

    November 16, 2013 at 10:38

    Every last detail of the covenant between the people of Israel and the Lord was codified and that included the proper treatment of ones slaves and which part and how much of each field was allocated to the poor. None of it was optional or open to debate.

    Which is of course why rabbinical scholars don’t exist.

    Good to know that your sky fairy’s rules are also handed down direct and infallible. Just like everybody else’s.

  119. El Manquécito said,

    November 16, 2013 at 14:04

    the way of a man with a maid.

    And:

    It was strictly forbidden to take a person’s last warm garment in the winter

    Somewhere DSK pricks up his ears.

  120. tigris said,

    November 16, 2013 at 15:25

    The Frau Doktorin is looking worried.

    Does she ever not look worried?

    Somewhere DSK pricks up his ears.

    Pricking up the ears.

  121. El Manquécito said,

    November 16, 2013 at 16:00

    Good to know that your sky fairy’s rules are also handed down direct and infallible.

    Dood, they’re CAST IN STONE!

  122. Failure Artist said,

    November 16, 2013 at 18:07

    Oh come on, be nice to Sondra. She has a point.

  123. Failure Artist said,

    November 16, 2013 at 18:08

    Oh come on, be nice to Sondra. I’m not even sure she said she believed the laws were divine or not.

  124. Chris said,

    November 16, 2013 at 18:09

    Actually the old biblical laws do mention abortion. The laws regarding the murder of a pregnant woman specified that a fetus was not viable before 40 weeks and therefore the crime would only be one murder not two. According to Jewish custom if a pregnancy had to be terminated because of rape and/or because it endangered the life of the mother – that could be done safely during those 40 weeks and with no penalties attached.

    I do love how it’s a matter of “religious freedom” to be pro-life because Think Of The Catholics!, but somehow there’s no such obligation for the Jews.

  125. Pupienus said,

    November 16, 2013 at 18:29

    The laws regarding the murder of a pregnant woman specified that a fetus was not viable before 40 weeks

    Izzat a human woman or heffalump you’re talking about?

  126. Cerberus said,

    November 16, 2013 at 18:59

    New post.

  127. Smut Clyde said,

    November 16, 2013 at 21:14

    Pricking up the ears.
    I’ll take “Obvious anagrams” for $200, Alex.

  128. Joe Orton said,

    November 16, 2013 at 22:09

    Somewhere DSK pricks up his ears.

    AHEM!

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