Michelle Malkin and National Review, two great… tastes… that… oh bleeding Hell Christ, is it Judgement Day already?
Michelle Malkin, National Wingnut Reunion Tour:
Obama Lied, My Health Plan Died
Esoteric topics are esoteric?!? Since when?!?
So yeah, last time’s entry might have been a teensy bit inside baseball (And the Understatement of the Year Award goes to…), so let us return once more to the fertile lands of the National Review, which seems to be in the midst of recruiting every single failed shitbag with a halfway recognizable name. Dennis Prager, Michelle Malkin? Why not? Fuck, I give it inside of a year before I’m quoting an Ann Coulter piece coming from these blighted lands.
So how’s ol’ Michelle, mah belladonna, been up to since her glory days of ripping the heads off kittens and pissing in the kiddie pool? Well apparently, like most of the wingnuts of today, whining about the glory days.
Shorter (or the last port before Jungle):
- Yes, that’s correct, we’re still trying to sell easily disproven lies and scare-tactics against health care reform as if it was still 2009 and we were still relevant. Hey, you try to be relevant in the modern right as a woman of color without turning tricks by the roadside for whatever sugar daddy wanders drunkenly your way!
Oh joy, more Obamacare bullshit. Because if the past 4 years of wingnuts demonstrating just how little they give a shit about actual health care reform and how willing they are to scream bloody murder against even moderate conservative reform of our broken abusive system haven’t actually changed a single mind, then damnitt, they can just do the same things, but EVEN LOUDER!
And for that extra dash of class, we get a title still trying to piss on Bush era liberals as if a) we didn’t turn out to be 100% right about that disastrous war of choice and b) as if it was a good idea to remind people that you were once so attached to Captain Codpiece’s… er… codpiece that you were accused of being a barnacle.
We begin with an outrageous lie.
Like an estimated 22 million other Americans, I am a self-employed small-business owner
Uh huh, yeah, sure, and I’m the bloody Queen of Fresno, ruler of the lands from the Big Boy Burger shop to the place where the oil change shop used to be.
Yeah, sure, “self-employed” “small-business” owner, I mean, there’s being asked to swallow whoppers and then there’s having your jaw broken just trying to work the shaft. Yeah, being employed by how many countless right-wing media programs to pop on and do your demented bat impression for a few minutes before walking away with a pile of money larger than your head is totes equivalent to being an actual small business owner. I mean, you work for how many companies writing books, doing appearances, writing blog posts? And you still want to pretend that you’re some American Dream, small-business owner trying to get your neighborhood pie shop through to the next quarter despite the recent blueberry blight? Just because you threw an Incorporated after your name in order to make it easier to dodge taxes? Oh, please. Spare me.
And you wonder why people have learned to tune out you fuckers when you go on about pretending to speak for the “poor small business owner”.
who buys health insurance for my family directly on the individual market. We have a high-deductible PPO plan that allows us to choose from a wide range of doctors.
No, really, why the fuck have you had to waste your family’s money buying some shitty non-insurance with an obscenely high deductible (you do realize that that means an obscenely high amount out of pocket before your “insurance” even bothers to cover anything, right? And those tend to be coupled with cripplingly low caps so if you do get super sick, they won’t even cover that catastrophic care?).
As we’ve established, you aren’t some poor independent artist trying to make enough to live on with commissions and the rare piece that sells to a minor gallery. You’re a dedicated wingnut who has been suckling the teat of wingnut welfare for the last *cough cough* years. You’re saying that every last one of those major media companies? From the Koch brothers shell organizations to Fox fucking News to the various right-wing publishing scams to the National Review, not a damn one could even be arsed to pony up for some generic bottom-dollar “health plan”?
And this is somehow the fault of the mean old liberals who tried to implement an actually functional health care system but were beating back to a tired conservative wish list that entrenches a lot of shitty health insurance problems, but at least tries to fix the most obvious scams and failures to take care of the masses.
Or rather, we had such a plan.
Last week, our family received notice from Anthem Blue Cross Blue Shield of Colorado that we can no longer keep the plan we like because of “changes from health care reform (also called the Affordable Care Act or ACA).” The letter informed us that “to meet the requirements of the new laws, your current plan can no longer be continued beyond your 2014 renewal date.”
In short: Obama lied. My health plan died.
Mm hmm. And if this is a true story, which is highly unlikely after that load of bull to start us off, it’d be a good fucking thing.
The plan you described was a fucking fraud, selling the “cheapness” of “high deductible” health care to sell you a plan that would only serve to bankrupt you and fail to pay out when you needed it. In short, you were paying for the privilege of health care in name only.
And frankly, if that didn’t seem to bother you and you are weeping for its loss, then Bob damn, I’m not sure what your beef is seeing as how the most cynical look at the new law will just have you doing the same damn thing.
Remember? Our president looked America straight in the eye and promised: “If you like your doctor, you will be able to keep your doctor. Period. If you like your health-care plan, you will be able to keep your health-care plan. Period. No one will take it away. No matter what.”
House minority leader Nancy Pelosi (D., Calif.) also lied when she pledged: “Keep your doctor, and your current plan, if you like them.”
This isn’t just partisan business. It’s personal. Our cancellation letter states that Anthem is “not going to be selling new individual PPO plans.” When we asked whether we could keep our children’s doctors, an agent for Anthem told my husband and me that she didn’t know. The insurer has no details available yet on what exactly they’ll be offering. We either will be herded into the Obamacare federal health-insurance-exchange regime (launching October 1), a severely limited HMO plan, or we’ll be presented with costlier alternatives from another insurer. If they even exist.
Yeah. I heard. And after months of shitting on every piece of it you could and preventing any implementation and appealing to the wingnuts in charge of these abuse factories to protect whatever loopholes they had, you’re somehow shocked when the insurance jackoffs who were already robbing you blind gives you one last dicking around for old time’s sake?
Are you fucking new to health insurance?
Did you seek out a brand new health plan that you knew would be discontinued by the program in order to bring back your wingnut creds with a faux “see how my people have suffered against this atrocity” story for your paymasters and their insurance overlords?
Oh, you did? Well, it wasn’t exactly subtle, dear.
My family is not alone. Across the country, insurers are sending out Obamacare-induced health-plan death notices to untold tens of thousands of other customers in the individual market. Twitter users are posting their Obamacare cancellation notices and accompanying rate increases:
Linda Deright posted the news she received from her insurance company, Regence of Washington State: “63 percent jump, old policy of 15 yrs. cancelled.” Karen J. Dugan wrote: “Received same notice from Blue Shield CA for our small business. Driving into exchange and no info since online site is down.” Chris Birk wrote: “Got notice from BCBS that my current health plan is not ACA compliant. New plan 2x as costly for worse coverage.” Small-business owner Villi Wilson posted his letter from HMSA Blue Cross Blue Shield canceling his individual plan and added: “I thought Obama said if I like my health care plan, I can keep my health care plan.”
So what you are saying is that Blue Cross/Blue Shield was scamming your ass, selling you health insurance that was so utterly useless that it was viewed as the outright scam it was by the new system and discontinued for actual health insurance instead of “in name only” bullshit? And not only did you fall for it, but you proudly went to twitter to bleat your stupidity to the world in the hopes that it would enrage other delusional octagenarians with a remarkable power to forget all other insurance fucking arounds to rant about them damn darkies in Our Whitest of Houses?
Well, let us all celebrate your courage and wonder, you brave heroes of yore!
Few among Washington’s protected political class are paying attention, because they enjoy their lucrative taxpayer-funded government benefits and are exempted from Obamacare’s destructive consequences.
Gosh, wouldn’t it have been nice if we could have all had that? If we could have all had government benefits and government health care that was free and available to anyone as part of a sane taxation scheme that didn’t let the 1% of fuckwads build so many gold replicas of their scrotum they don’t know what to do with it all with money that could be going to actually helping people survive and relax enough to create new industries, companies, and yes, genuine small businesses?
If no one had to worry that a single hospitalization was going to slam them so far back to Completely Fucked Town that they couldn’t even remember their own name? Where we actually gave a damn about health care rather than letting a dedicated band of greedy illiterate shitheads burn everything down in the name of trying to cheat their way to power for power’s sake and their fears that good things that benefit people might awake people out of their stupor and actually reward the party that cares about them?
Gosh, what a nightmare world that would be!
But one of my state’s Republican congressional representatives, Cory Gardner, also lost his individual-market plan. Unlike most politicians on Capitol Hill, Gardner chose not to enroll in the federal health-insurance program. When I asked him why he opted to participate in the private market, he said, “Because I wanted to be in the same boat as my constituents — and now that boat is sinking!”
Oh well, let me weep for the lying shitbird who turned down free steak in order to lie about “how Obamacare is ruinin’ mah family”. Speaking as someone who is holding out hope for maybe perhaps possibly working for something that lets me buy into that given to state employees, I can’t really muster up the tears for the fuckburger who wanted to make a political theatre event out of “losing” health care that didn’t actually cover anything.
And just how much that seems to speak for those of us who’ve never had the luxury of being able to get away with catastrophically poor decisions as that because life keeps kicking us in the gonads without stop.
Gardner points to recent analysis showing rate increases in the individual market of 23 to 25 percent in Colorado. “After my current plan is discontinued,” he wrote last week, “the closest comparable plan through our current provider will cost over 100 percent more, going from roughly $650 a month to $1,480 per month.” He now carries his Obamacare cancellation notice with him as hard-core proof of the Democrats’ ultimate deception.
Maryland announced that its post-Obamacare individual-market rates could also rise by a whopping 25 percent. The National Association for the Self-Employed is recommending that its small-business owners and freelancers plan for at least a 15 percent increase nationwide. One of the reasons for those rate hikes, of course, is that Obamacare’s mandated-benefits provisions force insurers to carry coverage for services and items that individual-market consumers had deliberately chosen to forgo.
Americans who had opted for affordable catastrophic-coverage-style plans now have fewer and fewer choices. This includes a whole class of musicians, photographers, artists, writers, actors, and other creative people who purchased health plans through the individual market or through small professional organizations. As St. Vincent College arts professor Ben Schachter reports in The Weekly Standard, groups such as the College Art Association, the Modern Language Association, and the Entertainment Industry Group Insurance Trust are dropping their plans. Young, healthy members of these groups “are far more likely to see their rates go up — or to face the individual mandate penalties.”
Thanks to Obama, access is down. Premiums and health-care spending are up. Research and development on lifesaving drugs and medical devices are down. Because of Obamacare costs and regulatory burdens, at least 300 American companies have cut hours and benefits, according to Investor’s Business Daily. And the Obamacare layoff bomb continues to claim victims.
Obamacare is destroying the private individual market for health insurance by design, not accident. For hundreds of thousands, if not millions, of self-employed job creators, three fundamental Obamacare truths are becoming as clear as Obama’s growing nose: 1) You can’t keep it. 2) We’re screwed. 3) The do-gooders don’t care.
I’ve been at the point, they describe. Looking over faux bullshit non-insurance insurance scams because it looked like it was the only way to have “technically” insurance in order to get through those sorts of roadblocks to care. And it turned out that “technically” insurance is just “not” insurance. If it’s not in the “care provider list” then it doesn’t count and you’re just as screwed and out your dough for shit that doesn’t cover anyone.
I’ve seen friends blindsided by that crap. Going through chemo and cancer treatment with a plan with a payment cap and a high deductible. I think it saved them a total of a couple hundred dollars. The rest was made up with go-arounds and collections.
What is coming up on our plates isn’t fantastic. It isn’t where we’re going to want to end up and it’s not what’s going to be the solution to all the myriad of problems with our scam-based insurance culture. But it’s a start.
And if all that the right-wing can bring is whining 4 years later with bullshit media stunts about “losing” the single worst joke to ever be called “health care” as if real people didn’t understand how little it matters to lose shitty faux-insurance, then they are going to continue to be shocked as people shrug their shoulders and continue to support Democrats because they at least do not seem to treat life and death and most importantly health like some sick game of “gotcha”.
And you can try to appeal to the young, the uninsured, the struggling artists, but they’ll continue to look through your “I’m a small business owner” poses and your self-serving self-promotions at their expenses.
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. From the “small-business owners” here at Sadly,No! Enterprises and our Lord Master Soros who rules over us all. All hail Soros! We are aware of all Internet traditions.™