IT’S ALWAYS PROJECTION! Volume 3,476,638
I didn’t realize you could use “I’m rubber and you’re glue” defenses for violations of civil rights.
James Lewis, American Reactionary:
The Totalitarian Left is Back
The right-wing is starting to glaze over a little bit. They’ve been whipped into such a forthy santorum over so much tightly-packed shit that all the posts are essentially interchangeable.
It’s all “Blah blah blah, I’m shocked to find gambling going on here at this casino, blah blah blah, WAH! Minor non-incidents are so much worse than the fact that we regularly ran torture prisons for the better part of a decade, blah blah blah, I hate black people and can’t believe one was elected for two terms…. I mean something about Obama being Hitler because Hitler has become a stand-in ‘bad guy’ completely removed from his actual ideology and crimes…”
So it’s always a shock to filter through the endless repeats and find an argument that is… if not novel, certainly of a greater blatancy than I’ve grown accustomed to from the record-skipping hordes.
Shorter (or the last port before Jungle):
- So, when we went to go yell at the filthy liberals for not agreeing that the president is a NI-CLANG because of his continuation of Bush era surveillance-state policies, they laughed at us, pointed to our complete lapdog approval of the installation of such a state, and then reminded us that we called them treasonous anti-American bastards for daring to point out that such a system would have long term consequences we ourselves might not enjoy if a Democratic president came to pass…
NUH UH! Obama installed all of the Bush-era abuses of power! WAH! Mommy, make them stop giving us credit for the successes we no longer want credit for! WAH!
But this is of course a lie. Nothing in the Patriot Act authorizes the government-wide abuse of power by the IRS, EPA, FBI, DOJ, and other agencies with the coercive powers against Americans and foreigners.
For every paragraph:
Contrary to the last desperate defense spun by the Times, the Bush Administration never abused the press immunities of reporters; it never used the IRS to initiate hostile investigations of its domestic political enemies, no matter how poisonous and hateful those enemies became;
Moreover, Republicans never publicly wish for one-party rule in the United States,
And yes, where the paragraphs aren’t laughably ignorant of VERY recent history (sharing the usual strategy among right-wing writers of pretending they were in an 8 year long coma during the Bush-years they spent masturbating so hard to unrestrained authoritarian power they gave their dick blisters), they are FULL of IT’S ALWAYS PROJECTION, complete failures to understand what “totalitarian” means, the usual shout-outs to J-Load’s Liberal Fascism (which may very well have surpassed The Bible at this point in terms of holy books for right-wing assholes), and of course, a delicious smoothie of all the various right-wing conspiracies that could fit in the blender (the world’s scientists are all in on a scam to invent the idea of global warming? Check. FDR was a Stalinist? Check check. Obama is a secret muslim foreigner without a birth certificate? Check check check! Saul Alinksy?!? OH GOD YES, CHECK ME HARDER!).
Fuck, he even managed to fit in a reference to Journolist for Bob’s sake? Who here even fucking remembers that storm in a teakettle?
It’s like the whole hurricane of fail the right-wing blogosphere has been trying to swing over Washington DC all wrapped up in a tiny package with a pretty little bow made out of human entrails and feces.
And as an empathetic woman, I’ve got to say to the right-wing moguls who have been driving this little hurricane into being… Stop.
Stop demanding your broken stable of schizophrenics and shut-ins keep up this cycle of overblown hypocrisy and scandal-manufacturing. It’s quite clear that they simply can’t take the strain. The repetition is breaking them in half and as a dedicated snarkmistress, set upon the sculpted archway to harvest their sorrows, I cannot help but feel their pain. They’ve forgotten what they were supposed to care about when and what they were supposed to yell about and all that left is this plaintive wail for help.
Have sympathy, dear shitmongers, and pity for your poor subjects.
Because they clearly have no idea of what they do at this point.
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. Empathetic… HA! Like all left-wing women, I’m clearly an aemotional robot incapable of feeling anything but rage, boner-killing awareness of reality, and hatred for everything good and pure. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™
*Addendum: Yes, of course, the continuation of these policies is a terrible thing, but considering that not a damn one of these authority-worshiping lackwits gave a single damn about any of this before they were told to grasp onto anything they can in order to sell a media narrative about Obama being worse than Nixon, you’ll forgive me if I don’t pretend to take the right-wing’s performance of shock and shame as anything other than the kabuki theater it is. And further forgive me if I don’t pretend that said kabuki will do a damn thing to advance the currently running movements seeking a real improvement in the shitty spy-happy/Big-Brother-state status quo.