And to think, this irrevocable road to evil all started when a single boy scout admitting to liking a Disney movie with a female protagonist. If only America had stood firm. Sniff.
The President of the United States of Renew America*:
Mormons morphing Boy Scouts into ‘Girl Scouts’?
Damn, I’m sure going to be disappointed when this turns out to be yet another transmisogynist (because the great flavors of misogyny and transphobia just go so well together like cranapple or being a complete fuck and being a conservative) tantrum rather than a description of some transformation or gender-swap fanfic.
In fact, why wait? Scrolling ahead and:
Shorter (or the last port before Jungle):
- The fact that the Mormon Church would even think about letting the Boy Scouts be anything other than a hate group about how much faggots and trannies suck and deserve to burn in Hell shows how much more “moral” Evangelicals are in comparison.
Damnitt, and we were so close to seeing a new young adult series about Scouts doing gender transformations to defeat an alien invasion.
And loathe as I am to defend the Mormon Church on anything at the moment (fuck Prop 8), I can already tell I’m going to be compelled to do so as our wingnut du jour wastes no time going off the rails on a crazy train.
As the gay agenda rolls forth unchecked in fulfillment of its published goals and tactics
We will not rest until every continental breakfast contains an entree made of Christian babies. It is unfair how lesbians are denied their culinary needs in our glorious march of oppressing straight people through forced same sex weddings.
Actually, this puff of paranoia is about a random 23 year old book called After the Ball: How America Will Conquer Its Fear and Hatred of the Gays in the 90s, which in the gay community is mostly known as a work that argued overly much for sacrificing passion for pragmatism. But apparently it’s enjoying a nice revival amongst the tin-foil hat brigade who want to act like it’s some super secret list of marching orders that modern gays are using to enact Alinksy style brainwashing. And if you don’t believe me, you can just look at the current most-helpful Amazon reviews for the book.
— dragging Western Civilization down more predictably than the Muslim Brotherhood is likely ever to do —
Awwwwww. They hate us! They really hate us!
rational Americans need to come to grips with one of the most damnable frauds in the world’s history: the belief that there is such a thing as “being gay.”
Vile damnable gay people, trying to pretend that they “exist” what with their “existing” and all. Well, I’m on to them and their devious incorporeality!
And yeah, if this actually were true and he really were super obsessed with some the nefarious actions of a non-existent being, then… oh wait, Fundie Christian… huh, I guess not much would be different for him at all, then.
I vividly remember a college lecture I attended in the mid-sixties by the one-time head of the American Psychological Association, Hobart Mowrer, who plainly asserted there is a direct correlation between mental illness and sin.
Luckily, Universities have moved on from the days when apparently any homeless man could rant about the evil leprechauns in their teeth to become internationally accredited institutions of learning. And it happened around the time we let women and minorities into them. How interesting…
But seriously, Mowrer went a bit off the rails when he “found God” going from someone who just thought guilt was a great healer to someone obsessed with the idea that guilt and sin are responsible for all maladies of the mind, considered the Old Testament God a role model for happy families, and only championed group therapies (which turned out to be helpful for other reasons) because he thought it would maximize the times someone might break down and cry and reveal all their dirty icky sinfulness. In short, like most early psychologists, he was a creep who used his personal issues as a supposed universal rule for humanity. The field is better for having moved away from those like him.
I was quite astonished at his boldness — as he advocated a minority view then still held among many of his peers: that God is real, that violation of His laws is the main source of guilt, and that failure to abandon inherently sinful behavior leads naturally to serious consequences, including mental illness.
Fifty years later, the Western world has been deceived into accepting the false premise that one of the most ungodly sins in the Bible is no longer wrong, no longer sinful, and unattached to destructive consequences, not just for the individuals involved but for society as a whole.
Ironically, one of the chief sources of such self-delusion is Mowrer’s organization, the American Psychological Association, with its now widely-accepted position that homosexuality is a normal, healthy lifestyle, and that gays have little choice but to yield to their same-sex attraction.
Where have all the sane behavioral scientists gone?
Of course, not all would agree.
Now comes word that the influential Mormon church, with its progressively gay-friendly revisionism, is supporting the move to persuade the Boy Scouts of America to accept into its ranks young men (and hence the next generation of BSA leaders) who self-identify as homosexual,
Well… kinda. The actual resolution is pretty much a “what’s the bare amount of faggotry we can allow to get the media off our back about the fact that the Boy Scouts are just foot-soldiers for a narrow-minded religious cult”. When all is said and done, it pretty much says they’ll only accept a gay boy scout as long as they don’t act gay, certainly don’t do anything gay or in any way shape or form look like anything other than a super straight Christian and even then the prohibition on discrimination is so weak that as long as there is one other stated reason (including “ungodly behavior”, like say being gay) then its a-okay. In short, hardly a ringing endorsement for joining the 21st century and at all correcting the accurate assessment of the Boy Scouts being run as a religious hate group these days.
in open disregard for the BSA’s century-old “Scout Oath,” which is based in biblical morality.
Yeah, but somehow I think if the Boy Scouts had been as overtly religious as they are these days throughout that century history, I doubt we’d be talking about them except as a “hey, why isn’t there a boy version of the girl scouts, where they like hiked in the woods and stuff, that’d be awesome”.
He then follows this up with a bunch of paragraphs trying to argue that dem dere LDS boys be fag-lovers.
It is to laugh, yes.
The reason for the church’s turnabout? Increasing acceptance of the behavioral science community’s general view that homosexuality is “inborn,”
Curse you science! Is there nothing you do not corrupt with your queerification rays?!?
and thus largely biological (even though there’s no evidence of a “gay gene” — a fact conceded in 2009 by the APA).
This is apparently cited by a link to Wing Nut Daily. Nuff said.
At the heart of the church’s evolving acceptance of gays is also the widespread increase of homosexual children and grandchildren among the church’s membership. Whereas the Bible is clear in its condemnation of homosexuality as an insidious evil, the church has liberalized its posture toward the practice over the years “out of compassion” for families with gay adults and children — thinking such permissiveness is not only beneficial to serious transgressors of God’s laws, but to society at large.
And yes, as a California native, I’m loving the delicious irony of the Mormon Church’s belated attempt at whitewashing their hideous past to appear more “loving” with regards to an issue that America is quickly turning around on really fooling the bigoted assholes they worked so hard to curry favor with (by making their name synonymous with anti-gay bigotry) in order to try and get them to support the doomed presidential campaign of The Smiler. Delicious.
Justifying this moral shift is the distinctive belief among Mormons that the LDS church is the only true church of God, and as such, is entitled to supersede the Bible with human wisdom in the guise of “modern revelation.”
Put plainly, according to the evolving mores of Mormonism, God has changed His mind on homosexuality.
Which is pretty much the Mormon response every time their bass-awkwards views on a subject like race, gender, etc… becomes nationally known as the belated hateful claptrap that it is. Try and pretend it away by claiming a new convenant that completely replaces the old and everybody pretend that that bad thing never existed. What, did we support segregation well into the 90s? Whoops, new covenant, now we hide behind the magic underwear of our 2 or 3 black mormons whenever anyone brings it up.
Hell, it’s how most religions react to finally holding a belief that society deems far too toxic to support openly. Always having “deeply held beliefs” right up to the point where it is seriously hurting the bottom line and then, whoopsie daisy, new coat of paint, no one here could possibly have supported that bad old coat of paint, I mean how archaic do you think we are?
And Evangelical Christianity is no different. Hence why there are few direct calls for the inherent goodness of slavery or the perfidy of the Irish in sermons these days.
The script plays right into the hands of the clever, deliberate gay agenda for transforming Western society.
So wait, if these powerful non-existent gay sorcerers can actually bend the mind of God, then why the fuck are you worrying about some yahoos in Utah? The queers can make the Lord of All Creation dance to Lady Gaga on his little puppet-strings. I think we can safely say that the gays have well and truly checkmated you on this day (and how).
Blind leading the blind
The LDS church’s migrating position on gays stems in large measure from the inordinate value Mormons place on formal education. Unusually authoritarian as a society, Mormonism is naturally inclined to rely on respected authorities in academia’s behavioral sciences for guidance
Oh yes, kiddies, it’s our good friend IT’S ALWAYS PROJECTION. Oh, how we missed you while you were gone.
The origin of gender
Oh this should be good.
No matter the merits of such doctrine to non-Mormons, this official teaching of the church disallows any notion that gays are “born” gay. The LDS doctrine of “pre-mortal” existence requires acceptance of the belief that all males and all females lived as such “before the world was,” and that God placed male spirits in male bodies on earth when the time was right, and did the same for females, respectively.
Since there is no scriptural doctrine in the LDS canon that God is a prankster, or that He makes inadvertent mistakes, any suggestion that males occasionally end up in female bodies, and vice versa, is heretical — if not outright apostasy from the scriptural doctrines of the church.
God NEVER makes mistakes like putting a person in the wrong sexed body! EVER! Other mistakes God NEVER makes? Creating a non-viable embryo in a woman’s body. Fatal Genetic Disorders. The popularity of Justin Bieber.
And let’s not even get into the existence of those born into a body that is not easily assignable as either male or female.
Yeah, I guess it’s easy to view the world we live in as a flawless clock expertly planned as long as you clamp your hands over your ears and sing really loudly every time it makes a painfully loud grinding noise and winds back 3 hours.
But hey, why let me get you down, I’m one of those non-existent groups of people you nonetheless obsess over and hate for no reason.
Even worse, to deliberately redefine God’s creation of man and woman to match the unscientific rationalizations of behavioral science is the height of profane insult
Science. You’re doing it wrong.
Seriously, they are so desperate for the accuracy rating of science that they borrow the language even when it makes no fucking sense like here.
warranting God’s condemnation if the scriptures are believable regarding human nature.
Wah! Our God hates the existence of people who confuse us about our presuppositions on how the world works! Go away nasty peoples that challenge us! And boo any religion that doesn’t jump on the Denial Express with us.
God hasn’t decreed that the “sacred powers of procreation” be employed only between members of the opposite sex; rather, He has so designed our bodies that no other exercise of such powers is even possible!
Persons of either sex can’t “employ the sacred powers of procreation” with others of their own kind in any way, on any basis, by order of God-ordained reality. Members of the same sex can misuse their bodies and their sexuality — but they can’t truly “exercise the powers of procreation.” They’re intrinsically impotent.
In LDS leaders’ eagerness to sound profound before “the world,” they overlooked this thoughtless error and published something irretrievably silly.
God doesn’t say silly things, of course, but sometimes LDS leaders do — as in this case, where they proclaim it’s wrong for gays to procreate. I caught the absurdity the first time I read the Proclamation when it was released in 1995.
Oh this section is just precious.
He’s going to huff and he’s going to puff and he’s going to lord it over how silly that foolish religious idiot is believing such complete and utter nonsense. How silly could they be to do that, what ho ho.
And bonus ironygasms on the way he just strides up to the sex-phobic euphemism and chides it in an overly literal way before faceplanting himself on the fact that there’s a fuckton more to sex than just the creation of children (not to mention that vile nasty science has made fucking hardly necessary for that anymore).
Now that’s ironic, and amusing.
Gender is an essential characteristic of individual premortal, mortal, and eternal identity and purpose. (emphasis added)
That is indeed…a word.
In the beginning, therefore — meaning the beginning of pre-mortal “spiritual” existence — God created male and female, and nothing in between, bisexual, homosexual, transgender, or otherwise gender-challenged.
That’s not how… any of that… sigh… at least I know understand a little more of why my uncle kept trying to insist that since I was undergoing transition, I must be bisexual. Or I would if that still wasn’t batshit nonsense.
Such “identity and purpose” was divinely chosen and assigned. Thereafter, God’s selection of gender for all persons, being divinely-chosen, was meant to remain fixed throughout each individual’s earth life and all eternity.
And lo it is that our earthy vessel is but a form for our immortal spirits, for it is that spirit, the internal reality of the mind and its god-given assurances of truth, that should be respected and seen as the truth above all. Though the outward face of the vessel may seem to us different than what we’ve been raised to expect from that inward self, God’s truth shines through and-
Oh I’m sorry for actually expecting internal consistency from these bigots. I guess all that blah blah blah about the mind being the house of the spirit and our flesh being disposable examples of sin fly right out the window once it comes to accepting a trans* person’s gender. Just like how all the blather about the goodness of celibacy and living a chaste life go right out the window when it’s an asexual woman talking to her pastor about why she has no plans to marry (yeah, there are more than a few asexuals who were immediately told that God’s most important commandment was to be fruitful and multiply when they came out to their pastors).
It’s almost like all these “divine-inspired” Holy Laws that you’ve lived your life by since last Thursday are just hastily cobbled together excuses for your bigotries coated in the language of a divine authority so it can sound like someone more important than you shares your exact prejudices and doesn’t think you should ever grow as a person.
How very convenient that belief system is.
God did not “mess up” and place a female spirit in a male body, or the reverse.
NO! NO ERRORS! EVER EVER EVERVEVRVERVEVR! WAAHHHHHHHHHHH! Mommy, the mean non-existent trannies are confronting me with the illogic of my supposedly divine inspired bigotry again! Make them stop, mommy! It’s unfair! Make them go away so I never have to accept that I live in a chaotic universe ruled by chance and if I ever want to have a world where mistakes and cruelties are not allowed to propagate, then I’ll have to actually make it happen myself often by angering a lot of powerful people and taking some legitimate risks for other people! WAHHHHHHH!
Even the very thought that such self-evident truth might have loopholes, exceptions, or errors is patently evil and inconceivable, considering the divine source of all assigned gender.
Yeah, that’s right. Not only am I the non-existent puppet master of God, but I am in fact a being of pure evil, “existing” solely to make holy men question their inane assumptions about reality and gender even though that and I am impossible.
Fear me, for I am Cerberus, destroyer of worlds! Mother of the unending night! Fear me and repent! First we’ll turn your boy scouts gay! Then we’ll turn them into girls! Next, the world! And all as prophesied in the unholy manual of World’s End:
The Gay Agenda.
The Proclamation ends (after admonishing all persons to fulfill their obligations to God and their families) by saying,
[W]e warn that the disintegration of the family will bring upon individuals, communities, and nations the calamities foretold by ancient and modern prophets [that is, Mormon leaders].
In other words, put bluntly, given the obvious thrust of the document, civilization itself depends on healthy, moral-based, one-man/one-woman traditional marriage. Succumbing to the gay agenda will destroy families, and with that destruction, all that is good and essential in society.
No doctrinally-informed, moral person could deny such obvious truth.
…Yes, obvious… What with the nonexistent gays fighting for nonexistent rights, somehow causing straight families to disintegrate… in a way that isn’t already done in the way religious parents are encouraged to disown their children for coming out as queer in some way… that’s… logic… yeah, sure, let’s roll with that.
You just keep fighting that good fight there Cap’n.
But know that all your struggles are for naught, for nigh the morn of the fulfillment of the 6th prophecy of Gay Agenda will soon come to pass! The Boy Scouts may eventually think about maybe joining the 21st century on an issue you have long since lost and will only continue to slide into greater and greater irrelevancy to the point where not even your home-grown staff of shut-ins and asylum residents will support you.
And then lo, in veritas, on that endless night, a trillion rainbow-flag wearing locusts will descend and swallow you whole.
As it was written in the Gay Agenda, amen!
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. I’ve been rereading the Lucifer comic series put out by Vertigo recently, but I don’t see any evidence that it’s been affecting my writing style. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™
Stephen Stone, RA President
This is the crazy that all the other Renew America descends from. Like a single-cell bacteria of religious batshittery.