Feb
3

A Glimpse Of The Future In Which Glenn Reynolds’s Robotic Foot Stomps On Human Face — Forever!




Posted at 7:44 by HTML Mencken

A late night dose of musical transhumanism with some robotics thrown in.

It was long rumored that the following showed the sad end-of-line moment of Instabot5000 whose synthvox was appropriately programmed with the voice of Slim Pickens:

And could this be his counterpart Helenbot9D9, a Randroid pleasure model who zaps liberals and fixes sammiches? It would be irresponsible not to speculate!

But the Insties’ consciousnesseseses live on, controlling an ever more formidable exoskeleton while absorbing other wingnuts along the way until its physical strength finally matches their triumphant will and ideological certitude and then…OMG*!

Also, too:
reynoldsentry6.jpg
reynoldsentry1.jpg

*Cf classic Sadly here and here.

34 Comments »

  1. HTML Mencken said,

    February 3, 2013 at 7:46

    The Eilers cover of M.E. is amazing, btw.

  2. Crissa said,

    February 3, 2013 at 10:04

    Yeah, you start with such beauty and end really far out in wherethefuckistan…

  3. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    February 3, 2013 at 11:48

    I’d rather see Glenn Reynolds’ robotic foot stomping on a human face forever than to see Glenn Reynolds’ robotic dong slamming into a sexy robot‘s, uh, intake port.

  4. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    February 3, 2013 at 12:30

    But the Insties’ consciousnesseseses live on, controlling an ever more formidable exoskeleton while absorbing other wingnuts along the way until its physical strength finally matches their triumphant will and ideological certitude and then…OMG*!

    Doltron!

  5. Shakezula said,

    February 3, 2013 at 14:08

    B4 = Win.

    That is all.

  6. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

    February 3, 2013 at 16:07

    ? Shake it, Shake it, Sexy Robot…?

    darn you, B^4!
    ~

  7. DAS said,

    February 3, 2013 at 16:17

    Chrissa — starting with such beauty and ending up in wherethefuckistan is also known as driving on I-75 from the serenely undulating landscape of the Northeastern exurbs of Atlanta to the hills and hollers just outside of Chatanooga where there isn’t even country music to be found on the radio

  8. Rastafas said,

    February 3, 2013 at 16:29

    Not be left out of any collection of random robot song links:

    The Humans Are Dead by Flight of the Conchords

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WGoi1MSGu64

  9. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    February 3, 2013 at 16:57

    darn you, B^4!

    Resistance to the Pinker Tones hegemony is futile! How about the lounge version? Just found this and now I’m totally in love with Virginia Maestro. I think Glenn Reynolds would prefer a Betty Boopbot, a Flappertron3000, if you will.

    Now that I’ve infested everyone with earworms, I think I shall sleep off my graveyard shift.

  10. The Malfunctioning Glenn Reynolds Robot said,

    February 3, 2013 at 17:29

    Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Guns guns guns! MORE JOHN HAWKINS ON AMERICAN MASCULINITY. Read the whole thing.

  11. Chris said,

    February 3, 2013 at 18:50

    The Malfunctioning Glenn Reynolds Robot On A Normal Day said

    Fixed that for you, bro!

  12. Chris said,

    February 3, 2013 at 18:50

    Or sis, as the case may be.

  13. The Central Scrutinizer said,

    February 3, 2013 at 19:19

    You have just destroyed one model XOJ-37 Nuclear Powered Pan-Sexual Roto-Plooker. And you’re gonna have to pay for it! So give up, you haven’t got a chance.

  14. Jennifer said,

    February 3, 2013 at 19:21

    I’d rather see Glenn Reynolds’ robotic foot stomping on a human face forever than to see Glenn Reynolds’ robotic dong slamming into a sexy robot‘s, uh, intake port.

    Too late! Such a thing already exists:

    Ole Perfesser pron

  15. Joe said,

    February 3, 2013 at 19:21

    Fick mich, du miserabler hurensohn
    Fick mich, du miserabler hurensohn
    Streck ihn aus
    Streck aus deinen heifien gelockten.
    Streck ihn aus
    Streck aus deinen’ heinen gelockten
    Streck ihn aus
    Streck aus deinen heiften gelockten schwanz
    Ah-ee-ahee-ahhhhh!
    Mach es sehr schnell
    Rein und raus
    Magisches Schwein
    Mach es sehr schnell
    Rein und raus
    Magisches Schwein
    Bis es spritzt, spritzt, spritzt Feuer!
    Bis es spritzt, spritzt, spritzt Feuer!
    Aber beklecker nicht das Sofa, Sofa!
    Aber beklecker nicht das Sofa, Sofa!
    Aber beklecker nicht das Sofa, Sofa!
    Aber beklecker nicht das Sofa, Sofa!

  16. S. cerevisiae said,

    February 3, 2013 at 19:21

    Can we just put Reynolds brain in a jar and call it good? I hear Yuggoth is lovely this time of year.

  17. Anonymous said,

    February 3, 2013 at 19:21

    The white zone is for loading, and unloading only.

  18. S. cerevisiae said,

    February 3, 2013 at 19:33

    The white zone is for loading, and unloading only.

    Obligatory: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AZ2EPeq1TK0

  19. Substance McGravitas said,

    February 3, 2013 at 19:59

    It rubs the Solvent on its armature or it gets the hose.

  20. wiley said,

    February 3, 2013 at 20:58

    I can’t load plug-ins right now. Evidently the last Chrome update fucked up my relationship with Flash, and my tech support is sleeping, and HTML Mencken is on fire.

    Harrumph.

  21. Provider_UNE_AndPlayersToBeNamedLater™ said,

    February 3, 2013 at 20:58

    The Central Scrutinizer said

    Are you possibly the CS formerly seen at the Eschaton who has/had a blue healer?

    If so, very nice to see you again.

    I just happened to stumble into a righteous internet situation that doesn’t involve starbucks or the spam filter cock block, that has kept me from these pages for so long. I’ve missed you guys, though I suspect that some of you might not have missed me.

    “From here to Ubiquity” for the time being anyway.

    xoxxox,
    K

  22. Major Kong said,

    February 3, 2013 at 21:01

    I just got done with a week of night-flying and I’ve got that “stomped by bikers” feeling.

  23. Provider_UNE_AndPlayersToBeNamedLater™ said,

    February 3, 2013 at 21:08

    Hey Wiley!!!! good to see you. wish I could serve as form of ersatz tech support, but I gave up on chrome a while ago, when a version came out that wanted me to log into my google account before letting me browse the intertrons.

    /adding intertrons to my dictionary…

  24. Provider_UNE_AndPlayersToBeNamedLater™ said,

    February 3, 2013 at 21:13

    I’ve got that “stomped by bikers” feeling.

    Been to that party many times. I hope a hot bath has been taken.

    Good to see you sir, I run across the picture of your herb munching feline overlord quite often when searching for shit to watch on one of the many partitions on the franken-top*.

    *laptop that went tits up one day that now has cardboard where the keyboard and track pad used to be…praise be that the usb ports work…

  25. Provider_UNE_AndPlayersToBeNamedLater™ said,

    February 3, 2013 at 21:20

    I canna tell you how happy I am to be able to jump into this place again without having to ride two and a half miles down the road to a wifi enabled coffee shop that is not blocked by the Sadly No! spam filter.

    WoooooFuckingHooooo!!!! A chance meet-up with a housemate that owed me some money led to a password and access to his wifi.

  26. Major Kong said,

    February 3, 2013 at 21:24

    Feline overlord decided that I really needed to get up and play with her this morning. So much for my plans to sleep in.

  27. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    February 3, 2013 at 21:33

    Feline overlord decided that I really needed to get up and play with her this morning.

    They can be quite insistent about such.
    .

  28. Provider_UNE_AndPlayersToBeNamedLater™ said,

    February 3, 2013 at 23:45

    Feline overlord decided that I really needed to get up…

    Been to that party as well, many times, in fact. As much as it might have pissed me off from time to time, I cherish every one of those moments. While I am currently beast-less, I did have the pleasure of walking a house mate’s dog today.

  29. Jennifer said,

    February 4, 2013 at 0:55

    I actually have a kitty that has never, ever, pestered me to get up and feed or let her out (or play). She waits until I roll out of bed, and sometimes sleeps in for a few hours after I get up.

    She’s the only cat I’ve ever known like this, though.

  30. LIBERTARIAN NANOBOT ORCHESTRA said,

    February 4, 2013 at 3:42

    EMBRACE YOUR NANOBOT FUTURE!

    THE POWER IS ONE HALF ON

    MR. BLUE SKY

  31. Pinko Punko said,

    February 4, 2013 at 3:45

    Righteous Bubba, you traitor. VOte number 8!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  32. Aerosmith said,

    February 4, 2013 at 5:24

    *Cf classic Sadly here and here.

    The past is gone.

  33. deering said,

    February 4, 2013 at 13:40

    Hmm, shouldn’t Reynolds have wound up trapped in Maximillian’s body atop a flaming mountain?

  34. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    February 4, 2013 at 20:48

    Man a robot Zappa festival and I missed it! And Provider_UNE… is back! And so much HTML Mencken!

    It’s too good! AAAAAAaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh. [cough]

    Ok, I’m ok again.

Leave a Comment

  • Things of Interest

  • Meta Goodness

  • Clunkers

  • httpbl_stats()