Jan
7

The Eye-Blacked Piece




Posted at 23:58 by Tintin

joe_kovacs
ABOVE: Joe Kovacs

Shorter Joe Kovacs, Wingnut Daily
‘Gay’ CBS Star Now Mimics Tim Tebow?

  • What further proof do you need that the television networks are run by Christian-hating fags than a Superbowl ad where a faggot tries to look like a manly Christian quarterback?

This little piece of wingnut butthurt was prompted by a television ad on CBS advertising the Superbowl with an image of faggity-fag fag Neil “Faggie Howser” Patrick Harris wearing eyeblack with the date of the upcoming Superbowl written on it.  This is obviously an effort to embarrass Tim Tebow and mock his Christianity by having a faggity fag fag Satan-worshipping nancy boy emulate God-fearing and manly Tim Tebow’s signature style.  Because, of course, Tim Tebow is the only athlete who writes messages on his eyeblack . Sadly, No!


‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™


228 Comments »

  1. Chris said,

    January 8, 2013 at 0:06

    Tim Tebow is one of those cultural sensations that I’m aware exist and have a vague idea what they’re all about, but only a vague idea because I don’t really care (Downton Abbey is another example). I only have a generally bad vibe about him because of the adoration my fundiegelical wingnut relatives express for him on Facebook (of the “if they like him, and it’s because of his religion, he probably sucks” variety). That fair?

    And yeah, the overall message – “A GAY MAN IS DOING A JOB THAT USED TO BE A CHRISTIAN MAN’S! SHOCKING! OUTRAGEOUS!” – is retarded. Par for the course for Wing Nut Daily, I suppose.

  2. Bitter Scribe said,

    January 8, 2013 at 0:08

    Of the many unhinged choices in the online poll accompanying this article, my favorite is:

    CBS is clearly juxtaposing Harris with the Tebow image to make the homosexual actor seem virtuous

    Yes, I know I’m going to start watching “How I Met Your Mother” now.

  3. DAS said,

    January 8, 2013 at 0:17

    This begs for a youtube video of the scene in the Simpsons where they flash back to show how Joe Namath turned Homer’s mother into a DFH. Unfortunately, it seems the only relevant clip I can see that has decent sound quality is dubbed in Spanish: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oOXGO01zR9k

    So much for ‘Murkan patriotism, eh?

  4. Substance McGravitas said,

    January 8, 2013 at 0:20

    This begs for a Tebow-patting-bums video is what it begs for.

  5. jim the heretical anti-cliff lemming said,

    January 8, 2013 at 0:31

    Yet another tragic case of Hugbox Deficit Disorder.

    Tim Tebow, known for his Christian faith as well as football, became world famous for proclaiming Bible verses such as John 3:16 on his eyeblack, especially when he played for the University of Florida Gators before going pro.

    … a daring statement of faith which no pro-league star ever made before!

    One football fan who watched the CBS promo Sunday made the connection between Harris and Tebow, saying, “They’re pushing a gay agenda by using him, and they’re mocking Christians at the same time.”

    I just Tebowed with a side order of blecchhh.

  6. D Johnston said,

    January 8, 2013 at 0:32

    Oh, well that ad’s gay as hell.

    Stuff like this is a reminder that it’s impossible to be gay and apolitical these days. As long as there is a subset of the population that considers your existence something to be litigated, opting out is really not possible.

  7. D Johnston said,

    January 8, 2013 at 0:39

    Of the many unhinged choices in the online poll

    Fifteen choices in this bastard. Does WND not understand how the misleading wingnut poll works? The trick is to have only one “correct” answer and many “incorrect” answers so the liberal vote gets split up.

    Assuming anyone other than Farah’s space cadets actually votes. I never noticed it, but you have to register of vote, which no doubt means inviting more spam into your life.

  8. Chris said,

    January 8, 2013 at 0:55

    … a daring statement of faith which no pro-league star ever made before!

    Heh.

    That kinda reminds me of how every science fiction show since Star Trek that was in the same vein – Babylon 5, Firefly, BSG – has portrayed a future where religion continued to matter (unlike Trek), and every time, there’s been a large chunk of fans clapping, cheering and going “finally, someone bucks the trend and dares to portray faith in the future!” Never mind that “a future with religion” has been the mainstream template forever and that Star Trek’s pretty much the only show that ever dared to buck the trend by imagining a future where humanity outgrew religion.

    If there’s even one challenge to the total universal dominance of their worldview… they feel marginalized and downtrodden.

  9. Fenwick said,

    January 8, 2013 at 0:58

    Mango with revealing typo….

    oldwhiteguy:
    harris is just another perv. they can try and my homosexuality seem normal but it will never be normal.

  10. Chris said,

    January 8, 2013 at 0:58

    Stuff like this is a reminder that it’s impossible to be gay and apolitical these days.

    FTFY. Everything’s political if a wingnut imagines it is. Though not to the nasty extent that gays and other Undesirables are, to be sure.

  11. Fenwick said,

    January 8, 2013 at 1:02

    Tintin: Great photoshop, especially writing his shit on toilet paper.

  12. Fenwick said,

    January 8, 2013 at 1:08

    Chris: Amid the snark-fest and jokes here, you bring classy writing, keen observation, and intellectual firepower to Sadlyville. As always, I’ve enjoyed your comments in the recent threads.

  13. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

    January 8, 2013 at 1:19

    A tattoo of his wife wearing a Mark Sanchez jersey and nothing else…

    And she’s “Tebowin’”
    ~

  14. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

    January 8, 2013 at 1:19

    Err, “Rex Ryan’s tattoo”
    ~

  15. Andrew said,

    January 8, 2013 at 1:28

    In re Hagel nomination: R.S. McCain admits that the Iraq War was a fuck-up but decides it’s more important to spite Andrew Sullivan.

    http://theothermccain.com/2013/01/07/the-nick-saban-approach-to-the-problem-of-chuck-hagel-make-his-ass-quit/

    He also appears to be suffering from the delusion that accusing Obama of anti-Semitism has never been done before.

  16. Chris said,

    January 8, 2013 at 1:31

    Thanks kindly, Fenwick! And the same to you!

  17. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 8, 2013 at 1:41

    “Because, of course, Tim Tebow is the only athleteposer who writes messages on his eyeblack ”

    FTFY
    The guy sucks,…possibly more than Neil ever will in his entire life.

  18. tigris said,

    January 8, 2013 at 1:55

    Tebow wasn’t the first, he was just the most annoying.

  19. Cole said,

    January 8, 2013 at 1:55

    Whether or not CBS is yanking Tebow’s chain or not, I think it is the idea that gay men might enjoy watching football that is freaking them the fuck out.

    According to the Rules of Cultural Warfare, they may have to add Pro Football to the Do Not Touch list.

    Oh fucking No!

  20. Pupienus said,

    January 8, 2013 at 2:08

    Joe seems awfully insecure in both his faith and his sexuality.

  21. Lancelot Link said,

    January 8, 2013 at 2:11

    gay men might enjoy watching football?
    That cannot be!
    How could homosexuals possibly get any pleasure from watching muscular men in extremely tight pants bending over?

  22. Bitter Scribe said,

    January 8, 2013 at 2:32

    Stuff like this is a reminder that it’s impossible to be gay and apolitical these days.

    Although if you’re a Log Cabin Republican, it might be preferable.

    How could homosexuals possibly get any pleasure from watching muscular men in extremely tight pants bending over?

    Especially when they’re about to hit the hole.

  23. bbkf said,

    January 8, 2013 at 2:49

    oldwhiteguy:
    harris is just another perv. they can try and my homosexuality seem normal but it will never be normal

    nice freudian whip…

  24. Santa Claustrophobia said,

    January 8, 2013 at 2:59

    Neil Patrick Harris is gay?

    I don’t know how I’ll ever manage the rest of my life, now. Thanks alot!

  25. Pupienus said,

    January 8, 2013 at 2:59


    How could homosexuals possibly get any pleasure from watching muscular men in extremely tight pants bending over

    Relevant.

  26. bbkf said,

    January 8, 2013 at 3:09

    i, once again, in my quest to make this a better world and also too, procrastination and boredom…checked out the christian post’s take on this…first part of the article was pretty much the wnd version, but then they offered OTHER OPINIONS!!!

    While some see the ad as an attack on both their religion and who the man who may arguably be the most popular Christian athlete in the U.S., others think such accusations against the television station are a stretch.

    “Oh, come on. This is really grabbing for straws,” Mikey Rox wrote on his Facebook page. “Perhaps they used [Harris] because he’s the star of one of the network’s biggest shows and they want to cross-promote. I don’t see how this ‘mocks’ Tebow or pushes the ‘gay agenda’ in any way.”

    Queerty, a pro-gay agenda news outlet, also criticized WND.com’s article, pointing out that singer Beyoncé Knowles, who is slated to perform in this year’s Super Bowl halftime show, previously posted an image of herself to her Tumblr account in which she is also seen wearing eye black with the game’s date written on it.

    No one accused the television station of “pushing a fierce diva agenda” after the Beyoncé photos emerged, states Queerty reporter Lester Brathwaite, who calls the complaints “an imaginary attack on an entire religion.”

    The Christian Post was unable to reach a CBS spokesperson for additional comments before publication time.

    although they get kudos for printing other viewpoints, i have a feeling that the christian post could rank right up there with renew murka for dipshittery as evidenced by the title of one of their ‘most commented’ on: What Would Jesus Say to Kim Kardashian, LeBron James and Ellen DeGeneres? you KNOW imma read it!!!

    anyhoo, here’s the best comment (out of three):
    Very sneaky way to push the gay agenda. I am curious though. Does the gay agenda include just watching the Super Bowl or does it include watching other professional football games? What about college and high school football? Are they part of the gay agenda too?

    runner up: World Net Daily also today called for an armed revolution against the American government. That’s all you need to know about them.

    i’ll be back to let you know what jeebus would say…

  27. bbkf said,

    January 8, 2013 at 3:11

    Relevant

    one morning when i was being forced to listen to a sport-like radio program the football player (a kicker?) said that nearly all nfl players do not wear cups…wtf?

  28. bbkf said,

    January 8, 2013 at 3:11

    nutcups: pros & cons…discuss…

  29. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 8, 2013 at 3:27

    They fucking hurt.
    End of discussion.

  30. Fenwick said,

    January 8, 2013 at 3:29

    Many, many, many mangoes–they go on for miles. I have rarely committed so much time diving so deeply into a Comment Swamp. One of the best features of this one: Excellent pushback and snark from multiple progressive trolls. The best moments are when several liberals pile-on together. (I’m cogitating about piling-on too, perhaps using a parody of the godbotherers.)

    Also, here is an useful tip for Sadlies who enjoy the challenge of faux-trolling here in Sadlyburg: The most common reichwing FAIL is misuse of commas. ‘Comma splices’ abound. ((Two sentences linked with a comma, instead of breaking them correctly with a period and initial caps.)) Also sprinkle in some wildly-misplaced commas in the middle of phrases or clauses. Comma Fails add a subtle authenticity beyond all-caps, overloaded exclamation marks, intentionally funny Miss Pellings, typos, and excessive capitalization.

    ((Of course, I shouldn’t be Mr. Grammar Person, because my Sadlyville comments are full of Miss Pellings. She is a hottie, btw.))

  31. bbkf said,

    January 8, 2013 at 3:40

    yeah…i’m just going to leave this one here…

    I think Jesus would have an engaging conversation with Ellen, as “one loves the sinner but Not the sin”. But, when it come to Kim and Kanye, I am sure he would be standing there shaking his head with his mouth hanging open in a state of complete speechlessness.

  32. Fenwick said,

    January 8, 2013 at 3:45

    Decided to savethe godbotherer parody for potential faux-trolling here. Now I’m off to Kharg Island again. Y’all have fun, y’hear!

  33. Pupienus said,

    January 8, 2013 at 3:48

    nearly all nfl players do not wear cups…wtf?

    Balls. Of. Brass.

  34. bbkf said,

    January 8, 2013 at 3:49

    okay, the what would jesus say article was a huge snore…just promoting that weirdo pastor ed young is planning a series of sermons on it…but hahahah…it led to this which i find pretty amusing…

  35. Pupienus said,

    January 8, 2013 at 3:50

    nutcups: …discuss…

    i prefer the time honored term “goody guards.”

  36. Pupienus said,

    January 8, 2013 at 3:58

    I can scarcely believe im pulling for the Tide. I must really really really hate Notre Dame. why, i guess i do!

  37. Whale Chowder said,

    January 8, 2013 at 4:06

    nearly all nfl players do not wear cups…wtf?

    WTF indeed. I just started to notice this phenomenon maybe last year? and I’m stunned. What is WRONG with those guys?

    I’ve been kicked in the yarbles…with a cup… and let me tell ya, it fucking hurts.

    That’s just…I just…no. Just, no.

  38. bbkf said,

    January 8, 2013 at 4:14

    again, without comment:

    Ed Young, pastor of Fellowship Church in Grapevine, Texas, has launched his own clergy fashion website, pastorfashion.com, to encourage and aid fellow pastors in being fashion forward.

    “Pastors aren’t typically known for their fashion. Most people don’t think of the runway leading up to the pulpit. But why not?! Why can’t the men and women of God set the standard for the rest of the world in fashion as well as faith?” Young wrote in the first post on his fashion website.

    “That’s why we’re launching PastorFashion.com. We want to set the trends,” he added.

    Young told the Houston Chronicle that it is important for pastors to be fashion-forward because they represent and communicate the message of Jesus, and they need to look good doing it.

    “When you look good, you feel good and when you feel good, you stand up and stand out in the world,” he said.

    The Pastor Fashion website features several instructional videos to aid men in making the correct fashion choices while preaching in front of thousands of people.

    Some videos include “Do you wear the right collar?,” “Skinny Jeans and Testosterone,” and “Ten Fashion Tips for the Faithful.”

    The number one tip on “Ten Fashion Tips for the Faithful” is: “It’s all about the FIT…Don’t buy your suit too big. If you’re too comfortable in a suit, it probably doesn’t fit. Suits are not sweat suits.”

    Although much of the reaction to Young’s new Pastor Fashion website were positive and supportive, some were unsure about the Texas pastor’s new project.

    “Can’t imagine Jesus caring a whole lot about what he wore,” wrote one reader of the Houston Chronicle report.

    “Eh, I don’t think its such a big deal. Some pastors enjoy playing golf in their free time, some brew beer, some sit for hours in solitude reading their favorite monk. This one obviously has a knack for fashion, and if he wants to bless others in his field with it, more power to him,” suggested a reader named Joel.

    Young, who has often remained on the cutting edge of modern Christianity with such controversial initiatives as his Sexperiment book and related sermon series, argues that good fashion is necessary to remain relevant to future generations of Christians.

    “We need to be conscious of our culture; conscious of things people connect with, like fashion, faith and fashion do intersect,” he told the Chronicle.

    “So many pastors look out of date, which tells people that God is out of date too…looking godly is not looking goofy,” he added.

    you know who else is trendsetting and fashion forward, hmmmm?

  39. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    January 8, 2013 at 4:23

    you know who else is trendsetting and fashion forward, hmmmm?

    Just tell me epaulets are involved.
    .

  40. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 8, 2013 at 4:28

    I’ve been kicked in the yarbles…with a cup… and let me tell ya, it fucking hurts.

    That’s the point! It hurts whether you have one on or not.
    The chances of catching one in the Jimmy are really kinda slim, but you try to make a cut, or “cross step”, and that fucker will feel like it severed a groin tendon. I’ve hit the deck like the proverbial sack of wet cement. Done for the day. Not a soul within ten yards.
    Goaltending? Yes, but that’s a whole different piece of equipment. Heavy padding everywhere.

  41. Major Kong said,

    January 8, 2013 at 4:29

    What Would Jesus Say to Kim Kardashian, LeBron James and Ellen DeGeneres?

    Note that it’s not “What would Jesus say to Donald Trump, Tom Delay and Rush Limbaugh”

    Not that I care much for LeBron James or Kim Kardashian but they’re junior varsity when it comes to sinning.

  42. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 8, 2013 at 4:41

    …and to quote Dana Jacobson, “Fuck Notre Dame, Fuck Touchdown Jesus!”
    I fell in love with her when I saw that video.

  43. Major Kong said,

    January 8, 2013 at 4:46

    I’m no fan of Notre Dame but I have to pick them over Alabama because I’m so sick of hearing about how fucking great the SEC is.

  44. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 8, 2013 at 4:52

    Every Big10 fan is too, but I just caint stand ND.

  45. Pupienus said,

    January 8, 2013 at 4:55

    What a great idea! Black and white garb with buckles – what’s not to love?

    too, the Pope is very fashion conscious. I mean, ruby fucking red fucking slippers! And the gowns, ooooooh the gowns!

  46. Pupienus said,

    January 8, 2013 at 5:00

    i fondly recall sitting in Beaver Stadium (may Joe Paterno rot in hell) with the snow coming down watching the Tide and the Nittany Lions slug it out in games that rarely if ever saw one team scoring more than 13 points. It was a bitter rivalry. Still, fuck Notre Dame with a 16″ ion powered ice augur.

  47. kg said,

    January 8, 2013 at 5:05

    The pope wears Prada

  48. Bitter Scribe said,

    January 8, 2013 at 5:15

    28-0 Tide at the half.

    Oh well. If the Irish keep playing as they have, the best you can say is that they didn’t give their fans any false hope.

  49. Pupienus said,

    January 8, 2013 at 5:23

    28-0 Tide at the half.

    WHY HAS GOD ABANDONED HIS CHOSEN GRIDIRON WARRIORS?

  50. tigris said,

    January 8, 2013 at 5:50

    Why can’t the men and women of God set the standard for the rest of the world in fashion as well as faith?

    *snerk*

  51. CRA said,

    January 8, 2013 at 5:58

    “Gay” CBS Star Now Mimics Tim Tebow?

    I had to click through to see if Kovacs really put scare quotes around “gay.” Yes, he did.

    For fun, I’m going to assume he’s doing it to help his older readers who might otherwise think that Neil Patrick Harris is full of pep, or vim.

  52. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    January 8, 2013 at 6:07

    For fun, I’m going to assume he’s doing it to help his older readers who might otherwise think that Neil Patrick Harris is full of pep, or vim.

    I remain convinced that Mr. Harris is full of both pep AND vim!
    .

  53. John Revolta said,

    January 8, 2013 at 6:28

    He’s gotta lotta moxie, and how!

  54. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    January 8, 2013 at 6:32

    Well, he’s much too young to be spry, just yet.
    .

  55. bbkf said,

    January 8, 2013 at 6:40

    I remain convinced that Mr. Harris is full of both pep AND vim!

    not to mention vigor and a healthy dose of vavoom!

  56. bbkf said,

    January 8, 2013 at 6:49

    oh, jaysus! just saw a promo for stallone’s new film, ‘bullet to the head’ and prior to that schwarzenegger’s ‘last stand’…what’s up with the old dude testosterone fest?

  57. Bitter Scribe said,

    January 8, 2013 at 6:53

    what’s up with the old dude testosterone fest?

    I think it’s called “trying to squeeze in one more payday before retirement.”

  58. CRA said,

    January 8, 2013 at 6:53

    I thought only curvaceous types could have vavoom. Well, they inspire men to exclaim, vavoom! But they don’t have any.

  59. Anonymous said,

    January 8, 2013 at 7:27

    Men can have vavoom. The curvaceous types have va-va-vavoom!

  60. Anonymous said,

    January 8, 2013 at 7:28

    Hey! Why did that post as anonymous?

  61. boconn13 said,

    January 8, 2013 at 7:31

    Sorry, I usually just lurk

  62. Babe Ruthless said,

    January 8, 2013 at 8:31

    Hubba hubba!

  63. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 8, 2013 at 9:54

    Hilariously, is there anything gayer than football? Besides actual gay sex, of course. I mean, football involves a bunch of big, sweaty, muscular men in skintight pants playing positions like “tight end”, “wide receiver”, and “fullback”. Of course, not being the sort of person to use “gay” in a pejorative sense, I’m not knocking football.

  64. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 8, 2013 at 10:00

    Oh, great… Lancelot Link is going to AHEM me back to the Stone Age.

  65. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 8, 2013 at 10:11

    I thought only curvaceous types could have vavoom. Well, they inspire men to exclaim, vavoom! But they don’t have any.

    They don’t cause Neil Patrick Harris to exclaim that!

    Huh, three posts in a row… gotta take a break. Man, the graveyard shift gets lonely.

  66. Babe Ruthless said,

    January 8, 2013 at 10:16

    “Hilariously, is there anything gayer than football? ”

    Spartan-style wrestling, naked with oil?

  67. Hoosier X said,

    January 8, 2013 at 10:48

    you know who else is trendsetting and fashion forward, hmmmm?

    Hitler?

  68. animus said,

    January 8, 2013 at 10:48

    Is Neil Patrick Harris America’s John Barrowman?

  69. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 8, 2013 at 11:08

    Is Neil Patrick Harris America’s John Barrowman?

    According to teh Wiki, John Barrowman is America’s John Barrowman. Neil Patrick Harris is a child actor who is currently starring in a popular sitcom. He came out of the closet a few years ago, and he totally ruined the 2010 Oscars by making them totally gay.

  70. Fenwick said,

    January 8, 2013 at 11:49

    Gaydar readings are strong with Pastor Young. You be the judge: http://pastorfashion.com/.

  71. Fenwick said,

    January 8, 2013 at 11:50

    Also the bold pink bar on his homepage.

  72. Fenwick said,

    January 8, 2013 at 12:01

    BBBB: You must be nearly done with yer shift. Whatcha gonna after work? Also, could you refresh my memory about your work? As I remember you work for a non-profit. (??) Also why does your organization need round-the-clock coverage?

  73. Fenwick said,

    January 8, 2013 at 12:02

    Feel free to insert ‘do’ in the second question. It was swallowed by WP. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it!

  74. Fenwick, Invincible Destroyer of Threads said,

    January 8, 2013 at 12:49

    My work here is done.

  75. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 8, 2013 at 13:39

    BBBB: You must be nearly done with yer shift.

    Hour and a half left, old chum!

    Whatcha gonna after work?

    I’m planning on hitting the store to buy a loaf of bread, then I’ll probably pass out for a few hours when I get home. It’s kinda cold to want to do anything after work.

    As I remember you work for a non-profit. (??) Also why does your organization need round-the-clock coverage?

    We need round-the-clock coverage to make sure nothing happens to our facilities- there’s some stuff which would tempt the avaricious, and there are fire detection systems to monitor. There are also tasks that I won’t recount, because they would make the organization I work for easy to identify. Suffice it to say, it’s not a normal work environment. I did my time in a Cubicle Farm, I’ll take the non-traditional job, thank you very much.

  76. Fenwick said,

    January 8, 2013 at 14:21

    BBBB: Thanx for refreshing my spotty memory. I’m imaging your night shift is sorta dull. Must be nice to have some Sadly conversation. Also, thanx for NPH as glittery song-and-dance man. Have you seen Doctor Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qVBjS22ppdw

  77. Major Kong said,

    January 8, 2013 at 14:29

    I thought I was the only one up at this hour. This constant switching from days – nights – days really messes with my sleep.

  78. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 8, 2013 at 14:33

    BBBB: Thanx for refreshing my spotty memory. I’m imaging your night shift is sorta dull. Must be nice to have some Sadly conversation.

    Only good night shifts are dull… if there’s excitement, that’s a bad thing! Actually, my workplace is pretty beautiful and mah preshus kittehs accompany me through the night. I get to do a good bit of writing, which is good. It’s nice to have the night owls and the antipodeans to keep me company here. Hi, Southern portion of the Eastern Hemisphere peeps!

    Also, thanx for NPH as glittery song-and-dance man. Have you seen Doctor Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog?

    I hadn’t seen that video before tonight, but it was the first NPH “Oscars” hit on the Y00T00B. I’ve seen some of “Doctor Horrible”, but it didn’t grab me, for some reason.

  79. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 8, 2013 at 14:35

    I thought I was the only one up at this hour. This constant switching from days – nights – days really messes with my sleep.

    I hear ya, old chum! The one good thing about the graveyard shift is that you know that almost everybody on the roads is driving to work while you’re going home- SUCKERS!!!

  80. Major Kong said,

    January 8, 2013 at 14:43

    I’m home this week so I’m getting up at the time I’d normally be going to sleep.

    Our schedules tend to go week on, week off so I’m constantly shifting my sleep cycle.

    It’s probably taking 5 years off my life, but I figure it’s the 5 years of drooling on myself in the nursing home so I can live with that.

  81. Suezboo said,

    January 8, 2013 at 16:03

    You’re making me feel all left out, B4.Snif.

  82. Bozo the Cocksucker said,

    January 8, 2013 at 16:10

    Basically what NPH has done wrong here is exist. And I, for one, am glad we’ve finally reached the point where homophobes are explicitly criticising gays for existing, discarding even the flimsiest of excuses.

  83. bbkf said,

    January 8, 2013 at 16:32

    Our schedules tend to go week on, week off so I’m constantly shifting my sleep cycle.

    i would be totally screwed if i had to work a job with those kinds of hours…after years of sleep issues because of fibromyalgia, i’m grateful now to be sleeping pretty decently…as it is, job stress/unhappiness is messing me up…right now, i feel like i’ve been run over by the flu truck…

    discarding even the flimsiest of excuses.

    oh no…they are trotting out that old chestnut ‘love the sinner, hate the sin’ harder than rafalca in the show ring…the condescension of that particular tenet nearly makes me insane…ranks right up there with the current trend of ‘bless their little hearts…’ if i should ever read a mango to the effect of, ‘love the sinner but hate the sin, bless their little hearts’ i would sit through not only the new stallone film, but also schwarzeneggers…if it meant i could hunt down that mango-dropper and…

  84. bbkf said,

    January 8, 2013 at 16:39

    The one good thing about the graveyard shift is that you know that almost everybody on the roads is driving to work while you’re going home-
    the ONLY thing i even remotely enjoyed when i worked the 12a-6a shift at the radio station was driving home…by the time i would get to the refuge, the sun would be up and lots of critters were getting up as well…it was like driving through a flipping disney cartoon…

  85. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    January 8, 2013 at 16:39

    Since this are teh Iantorwoobles, I am obliged to point out that NPH was also Doctor Horrible. zomg! NPH has already gay-ed up cartoonish super-villainy! How is WND going to function now? Also BLOGGING!?!! zomg, ghey people are allowed to blog?! BUT THAT IS THE MANLIEST THING A PERSON CAN DO!!1!thirteenthirtyseven!!1

    Perhaps this will blow-up again when Dr. Horrible 2 finally releases.

  86. bughunter said,

    January 8, 2013 at 16:42

    nutcups: pros & cons…discuss…

    Dunno about football, but in baseball it’s mandatory cuz that little ball is rock hard, travels fast, takes funny hops, and is just the right size to seek out a testicule or two.

    Most everybody I knew in baseball had a story of the last day they elected to forego the junkbucket… mine starts with the all too common line drive to short left field and an unseen bump under the grass, and then darkness… ending with awakening in the emergency room. Da boys didn’t come out of hiding for two days.

  87. Major Kong said,

    January 8, 2013 at 16:43

    i would be totally screwed if i had to work a job with those kinds of hours

    I’ve learned to take naps. I get my sleep on the installment plan.

  88. bbkf said,

    January 8, 2013 at 16:49

    I’ve learned to take naps. I get my sleep on the installment plan.

    i envy people who can nap…hubbkf can take a nap anytime, anywhere…wakes up about 20 minutes later, refreshed…bastard…

    all conditions must be perfect and the stars in alignment for me to nap…

  89. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    January 8, 2013 at 16:56

    zomg, sorry Fenwick for stepping on your Dr. Horrible. Feel free to AHEM.

  90. bbkf said,

    January 8, 2013 at 16:58

    hey, do you think tsam is still humping that girl? it seems to be taking a long time…

  91. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    January 8, 2013 at 17:08

    So anyways, NPH best remembered for Doogie Howser? Really? I’m getting to be pretty old and OFFA MAH LAWN and somesuch heretofore wherewithal but I can’t believe that.

    Doogie Howser ended twenty years ago. How I Met Your Mother has been in the top three sitcoms for the past eight years. And in this new media world where teevees is getting left behind, d00d has almost five million Twitter followers and an online puppet series.

  92. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    January 8, 2013 at 17:09

    hey, do you think tsam is still humping that girl? it seems to be taking a long time…

    Maybe he’s having a nap.

  93. Chris said,

    January 8, 2013 at 17:12

    “So many pastors look out of date, which tells people that God is out of date too…looking godly is not looking goofy,” he added.

    The Catholic Church has been wearing the same Roman overcoat for two thousand years, and last I checked, it had a hell of a lot more adherents than whatever Reform Bible Church of Christ of the week these guys are coming from.

    (Not that I’m hating).

  94. tigris said,

    January 8, 2013 at 17:48

    The Catholic Church has been wearing the same Roman overcoat for two thousand years, and last I checked, it had a hell of a lot more adherents than whatever Reform Bible Church of Christ of the week these guys are coming from.

    Yeah, but as someone linked above, the pope wears Prada.

  95. Chris said,

    January 8, 2013 at 17:56

    He also shits in the woods.

  96. Pryme said,

    January 8, 2013 at 18:07

    “I’m here to tell you 1776 will commence again if you try to take our firearms!”

    America’s too fat and lazy for that to happen.

  97. bbkf said,

    January 8, 2013 at 18:20

    He also shits in the woods.

    AND he’s black!*

    *no, not really…but, it is one of my favorite misrenderings ever…one night one of the waitresses and i were out of doors having a smoke before we finished cleaning up and we were talking about something…not always quick on the uptake, she was very, very proud to answer something i said with a super-snarky, ‘is the POPE BLACK?!?!’ to which of course i was like, ‘uuuuuhhh…no?’ she completely deflated and asked, ‘what’s that saying then?’ then i regaled here with all the variants i know of ‘is the pope catholic?’…it was pretty humorous and is a workplace meme still…

  98. bbkf said,

    January 8, 2013 at 18:22

    “America was born on guns and whiskey.

    as were thousands of redneck hillbillies…

  99. tigris said,

    January 8, 2013 at 18:30

    They call that a meltdown??? I once saw a liberal woman, when confronted about her views, start talking about her red dress. Liberals meltdowns are considered normal because they are almost all mentally ill. When conservatives get a little emotional it’s very unusual because they are mostly normal.

    This is a joke, right? She “once saw” a woman talking about redress and now knows all liberals are nuts?

  100. Chris said,

    January 8, 2013 at 18:31

    “America was born on guns and whiskey.

    as were thousands of redneck hillbillies…

    How they ever got enough support to pass Prohibition is beyond me.

    Actually, what’s stunning to me is that they went from having enough broad support to pass Prohibition to having enough broad support to abolish Prohibition… all in only one decade. That’s got to be the most impressive about-face in American politics.

  101. Pupienus said,

    January 8, 2013 at 18:37

    “America was born on guns and used them shortly afterwards to put down the whiskey rebellion (a tax revolt).

    Fikst for historical accuracy.

  102. Major Kong said,

    January 8, 2013 at 19:02

    I am obliged to point out that NPH was also Doctor Horrible

    Any relation to Doctor Evil?

  103. bughunter said,

    January 8, 2013 at 19:18

    Stranger than fiction: How Tide Detergent Became a Drug Currency.

    Feel free to ‘ahem’ me mercilessly if this was posted while I was away getting drunk on a tropical beach.

  104. bughunter said,

    January 8, 2013 at 19:23

    So cool!

    The Kraken has been Released!

  105. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 8, 2013 at 19:25

    Dunno about football, but in baseball it’s mandatory

    Ahhh yes, that game in which I was ALWAYS picked last.
    Girls that didn’t want to play were picked before me.
    I got a lot of model cars built.

  106. Pryme said,

    January 8, 2013 at 19:58

    “I was at work last year when a coworker was watching the news and said, ‘What’s rape anymore? You can’t stick your finger in someone without it being rape.’”

    Scooby-Dooby-Doo, Where Are You?
    We got some work to do now.
    Scooby-Dooby-Doo, Where Are You?
    We need some help from you now.

  107. tigris said,

    January 8, 2013 at 20:46

    “I was at work last year when a coworker was watching the news and said, ‘What’s rape anymore? You can’t stick your finger in someone without it being rape.’”

    Dear God some people are horrifying caricatures of human beings. A commenter there quotes one of the perpetrators as having asked how did anyone know she DIDN’T want it, that having his finger in her wasn’t her final wish. Because hey, who could resist such charm and savoir faire, even while passed out and thought to be dead?

  108. smut clyde said,

    January 8, 2013 at 20:48

    Major Kong said,
    I’ve learned to take naps.

    That’s why the autopilot’s there, right?

  109. Bitter Scribe said,

    January 8, 2013 at 21:03

    Actually, what’s stunning to me is that they went from having enough broad support to pass Prohibition to having enough broad support to abolish Prohibition… all in only one decade. That’s got to be the most impressive about-face in American politics.

    Remember, in those days U.S. senators were elected by state legislatures, and the use of initiatives and referendums were much more limited than they are now. So the “drys” just had to lobby state legislatures as opposed to appealing to the electorate as a whole.

  110. Fenwick said,

    January 8, 2013 at 21:15

    Feel free to AHEM.

    Never in life, sir. The link to the puppet series far outweighs any unintentional lapse on your part.

  111. DAS said,

    January 8, 2013 at 21:16

    In re clothing worn by clergy … reminds me of an old joke:

    Jew: “you know I used to be a Rabbi”
    non-Jewish interlocutor: “were you … defrocked?”
    Jew: “no. just un-suited”

  112. Major Kong said,

    January 8, 2013 at 21:37

    New diary:

    Gulf War Diaries – Command Decision

  113. bbkf said,

    January 8, 2013 at 21:41

    Gulf War Diaries – Command Decision

    one of these days i’m going to cozy up on the couch and read through your diaries…i need complete concentration when reading things i want to learn from…i know hubbkf will enjoy them too…in fact, i’m going to send him a link right now…

  114. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 8, 2013 at 21:47

    Dear God some people are horrifying caricatures of human beings.

    The anger, it burns.
    So liberals are full of rage, eh?
    They truly have no comprehension just how right they can be sometimes.
    I just… I…
    I need to walk.

  115. Fenwick said,

    January 8, 2013 at 21:56

    bug: Way cool !!! Thanks for the link. My favorite cetacean is the Sperm Whale. Most of its diet is giant squid. The ‘deep dives’ the whale makes to feed are simply remarkable.

  116. bbkf said,

    January 8, 2013 at 22:01

    Dear God some people are horrifying caricatures of human beings.

    The anger, it burns.
    So liberals are full of rage, eh?
    They truly have no comprehension just how right they can be sometimes.
    I just… I…
    I need to walk.

    i know…and they claim that it’s OUR fault and OUR intolerance and OUR hate that makes us so full of rage…but that is the way it is in the “i-got-mine-fuck-you-but-nobody-better-do-anything-the-slightest-bit-offensive-to-me-or-my-family-or-by-god-i-will-either-shoot-them-or-lobby-for-a-law-against-it-because-i’m-an-exceptional-individualistic-fuck” mind…

  117. bbkf said,

    January 8, 2013 at 22:05

    and i hope you all appreciate how difficult that was to type…

  118. Pupienus said,

    January 8, 2013 at 22:12

    Speaking of gays and sports, http://imgur.com/a/U8VdV

    Don’t even try to tell me Parsons isn’t thinking “I want to tap that, so bad.”

  119. Fenwick said,

    January 8, 2013 at 22:34

    From wiki:

    The sperm whale (Physeter macrocephalus) is the largest of the toothed whales. It is the only living member of genus Physeter…. [It] possesses the largest brain of any animal. Its name derives from a milky-white waxy substance, spermaceti, found in its enormous head.
    A mature male can grow to 20.5 metres (67 ft) long, its head representing up to one-third of the animal’s length. The largest living toothed animal, the species feeds primarily on giant and colossal squid. Plunging to 3 kilometres (9,800 ft) for prey, it is the deepest diving mammal. Its clicking vocalization, a form of sonar which may have other purposes,[3] is the loudest sound produced by any animal.

    A sperm whale can live for up to 70 years. It has the largest brain (18 lbs) of any animal, modern or extinct. Its body–especially the nasal complex–is remarkably adapted for extreme changes of pressure in 90-minute dives almost two miles deep. The social behavior of the (all-female) pods is very cool; among other things, the pod forms a defensive circle to protect the young (or injured) from attack by orcas.

    The sperm whale is very nifty critter. The battles between a sperm whale and a giant squid must be ferocious. (See the comparitive silhouettes in bughunter’s link (19:23)

  120. not a gator said,

    January 8, 2013 at 22:39

    Oh, well that ad’s gay as hell. Stuff like this is a reminder that it’s impossible to be gay and apolitical these days.

    Remember George Takei: “I love sweaty basketball players.” Out gay actors mocking homophobes in sports is a thing now. Although I doubt it was intended as a Tebow takedown. It’s very indirect, and Tebow is not a homophobe. He’s contained his god-bothering to filming tasteless anti-abortion ads. (And laaaaadies, he’s siiiiiingle.) No, seriously, I think he is faggity fag fag gay man but he’s still playing coy and pretty soon he won’t have enough of a career to make a splash when he does come out.

    SNL did an actual takedown of Tebow. It’s the one where Jesus is in the locker room and even he tells Tebow to take it down a notch.

  121. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    January 8, 2013 at 22:47

    I’ve seen some of “Doctor Horrible”, but it didn’t grab me, for some reason.

    He saw you were wearing a cup.

    I love that NPH plays a total womanizer on that CBS show. I wonder how many of the WND readers actually like the show and are now all “Wait, NPH is gay? Oh noes! I like him! Now I’ve got the ghey too! Aaaaaghhhh!”

  122. bbkf said,

    January 8, 2013 at 23:05

    SNL did an actual takedown of Tebow. It’s the one where Jesus is in the locker room and even he tells Tebow to take it down a notch.

    this ranks right up there as one of my faves…right up there with derek jeter’s taco hole…

  123. bbkf said,

    January 8, 2013 at 23:07

    I love that NPH plays a total womanizer on that CBS show. I wonder how many of the WND readers actually like the show and are now all “Wait, NPH is gay? Oh noes! I like him! Now I’ve got the ghey too! Aaaaaghhhh!”

    most of the ‘taters are all like, ‘GAH!!! teebee is ebil!!! it’s horrible filth, not funny and tasteless!!! i ONLY watch fox news!!!’

    and i’m not making that up…oh, some did concede to watching football or baseball…but the best was the lady who actually wrote that she USED to watch cbs for ‘the young and the restless’ but SHAME ON THEM FOR THIS AD!!! tebow is so nice! and y&r is full of bedhoppers, so who do they think they are?!?!?!?…it’s really flipping hard to argue with that logic…

  124. not a gator said,

    January 8, 2013 at 23:09

    That kinda reminds me of how every science fiction show since Star Trek that was in the same vein – Babylon 5, Firefly, BSG – has portrayed a future where religion continued to matter (unlike Trek), and every time, there’s been a large chunk of fans clapping, cheering and going “finally, someone bucks the trend and dares to portray faith in the future!”

    And clapping for the wrong thing–in B5 the captain’s an agnostic, the doctor belongs to this new agey cult, and the Minbari’s religion is remarkably materialistic (despite this notion that their souls can be stolen). Delenn and Lennier give an accounting of core credo that is taken almost word-for-word from Big Fat Atheist Carl Sagan. Sinclair stages an interfaith, interspecies friendship party thing and invites a human atheist. There are Catholic monks on the show but at one point a character lets it drop that there’s been a female Pope. Centauri religious customs also seem to be observed more in the breech. It’s revealed that all of the major races have legends about angels–and all of them are manipulations by the Vorlons in preparation for their war with the Shadows.

    If you’re a god-botherer, B5 is not the show for you. (If you’re an atheist, though, the show is kind of awesome.)

    BSG has its roots in Mormon culture. I guess it’s interesting from that POV.

    Firefly was frankly misunderstood by a good deal of its fandom. Witness all the claims that Firefly advocates libertarianism.

    Star Trek was strongly against organized religion. It’s caused tension within fandom. Roddenberry’s argument was basically against Christianity as an organized religion and failed to see another side to it, at the very least acknowledging ethnic differences and traditions, as JMS does.

    For example, while Ivanova is not religious, at one point she is depicted lighting shabbas or hannukah candles. Something that would never happen on Star Trek. Characters are only hinted at being Jewish, but they’re assimilated. (Zimmermann, the programmer of the EMH, as Soong, the creator of Data, might have been of Northern Indian descent, and the superman Khan a Sikh, and Kodos the executioner a Greek?) Ironically, they DO depict Picard indulging in a Christmas fantasy in Generations, though he is emphatically not a believer. Apparently some cultural traditions are okay, and others are superstitious. It’s a deeply problematic construct that comes down from the creator and continues to simmer below the surface. The last really popular Star Trek, Voyager, featured made-up and highly offensive portrayals of generic Native American religious beliefs. It was a point the producer of the show, Jeri Taylor, refused to compromise on. Interestingly, she borrows a number of notions from Roddenberry’s own pantheistic and dualistic beliefs as portrayed in earlier incarnations of Star Trek. At times, the show seemed like a real slap in the face to anyone who was too “ethnic”. (Even the alien characters, despite being officers and ignoring Neelix for the moment, were denigrated for not being “human” enough, at least according to the captain’s narrow definition of such.)

    Star Trek isn’t materialistic, like an atheist or agnostic. It believes all kinds of wooey things, it just thinks religious trappings are part and parcel of the ethnic differences that keep us apart, and are therefore suspect (and probably a fraud), that they stymie democracy and total actualization. Hence the hostility towards, say, Sikhs wearing their turbans at Star Trek conventions. In Roddenberry’s future, we may not all look the same but we’ll think the same.

  125. not a gator said,

    January 8, 2013 at 23:16

    Why, FYWP, I am not too quick, I spent twenty minutes on this overly overwrought comment!

    And I am suspicious of the closed religious community. It goes wrong. It oppresses women and children and men without the right connections or the correct degree of viciousness. The state should have supremacy. I firmly believe that. Giving religious leaders secular power is just a power play on behalf of those religious leaders in order to give them utter, slavish control over their subjects, to control both their outer and inner lives. That’s fucked up. But I think that tolerance of our differences is not a bad thing, that there is something very fruitful about interrogating the dominant paradigm with alternative viewpoints. In fact, plenty of research shows this to be the case. There is no way that we can all be the same and it’s idiotic and hurtful to try to impose such. We need to learn to get down with our bad selves and accept that we come to certain points in life via different paths. It’s okay. Which again, is something Star Trek has problems with.

    In fact, it’s gotten worse. In the first Star Trek, one of the main characters comes from a culture that is radically different from the rest of the crew, and he holds his own. In fact, it’s implied that his culture might have something to teach us. By the last TV iteration… well, I don’t know if any of you sat through ENTERPRISE… but let’s just say that like The Decider who was Deciderating while ENT was on the air, good, red-blooded ‘Murricans don’t need guidance. They know it all already. Don’t need no book-larning, no educated, experienced alien guides, no tekmolonogy. We’ll just bluff’n talk our way outta problems. I’m sure we can work sumpin’ out. Y’all need to be more like us.

    During the last season, which absolutely nobody watched, not even when somebody helpfully uploaded it to YouTube, there is actually an episode which shines a candle on xenophobia (even race riots), but that was long after the damage had been done.

    (The guy who wrote that ep, Mark something, apparently doesn’t give good enough blowjobs because he wrote this awesome pilot for a network show that got canned and basically is not JJ Abrams even though Abrams turns everything into shit but apparently he fellates all the right people because everyone in Hollywood sings Abrams’ praises and no this is not STXI butthurt, I mean he did okay with that, it’s more frustration with his fucking tv shows and his frigging attitude vis a vis the writers. I mean, fuck that guy.)

    /watches Scandal and Kitchen Nightmares
    /not ashamed one bit

  126. Fenwick said,

    January 8, 2013 at 23:19

    The Major maintains his high standards of excellence.

    Btw, I’m still wrestling with the CPX stuff. One problem is that the article needs graphics and photos for clarity. I can’t pop them into SN like the Major’s diaries. Are Sadlies willing to wade through multiple links?

    Instead of putting them in Sadlytown, perhaps I should follow the Major’s lead and put them in diaries at the Great Orange Satan? If I do, Guerrilla Voters Cadre 18 will NOT be happy signing up with Democratic cheerleaders / apologists….

    I needz to cogitate. Gonna fire up some coffee and get back to the CPX.

  127. smut clyde said,

    January 8, 2013 at 23:20

    Centauri religious customs also seem to be observed more in the breech.

    What I want to know is how those religious customs got into my breeches in the first place.

  128. not a gator said,

    January 8, 2013 at 23:24

    hmm, I tried the taco hole video, and while amusing in a sniggery way, I feel like I am missing something

    mebbe b/c I am a boston fan not a NYY fan, so I don’t know all the lore

    like when reddest red sock got free monies to start a game company in RI and it went kaboom

    dunno how many 1918-chanters knows the deets on that one

    I have no idea what Jeter gets up to off the field.

  129. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    January 8, 2013 at 23:28

    Interrogating the dominant paradigm.

  130. Fenwick said,

    January 8, 2013 at 23:30

    I spent twenty minutes on this overly overwrought comment!

    I wish I could write that fast with as much clarity and insight! Of the programs you discuss, Firefly was my favorite. I have no idea how anyone could possibly interpret it a ‘libertarian’.

  131. Dominant Paradigm said,

    January 8, 2013 at 23:30

    I know nothing! I was somewhere else at the time! You gotta believe me!

  132. not a gator said,

    January 8, 2013 at 23:32

    What I want to know is how those religious customs got into my breeches in the first place.

    tentesticles

    kinda handy

  133. bbkf said,

    January 8, 2013 at 23:41

    hmm, I tried the taco hole video, and while amusing in a sniggery way, I feel like I am missing something

    i don’t know what it is, but something about it cracks me up…and we all know that really, i am quite easily amused…it’s not sean connery jeopardy or alec baldwin soap opera doctor or scweddy balls funneh…but, it tickles my fancy…prolly, cuz i rilly, rilly hate the yankees…

  134. bbkf said,

    January 8, 2013 at 23:42

    also, too…i tried finding the alec baldwin soap opera doctor video…no avail…which is a great sadness…

  135. not a gator said,

    January 8, 2013 at 23:48

    I have no idea how anyone could possibly interpret it a ‘libertarian’.

    That’s because you have critical thinking skills, unlike most self-styled libertarians, who have them set in the “off” position.

    It almost makes me cry to read papers by what one might call ‘real’ libertarians and then compare that to the ideologically stultified rhetoric, mra-bullshit, whining, trolling, and screaming typical of the internet libertarian.

    The other issue is that there was an American left-libertarian movement in the 1980s that challenged the state-absolutist model (’86 decision allowing state sodomy bans, the war on drugs, allowing states to sterilize poor, drug-addicted women, etc, trying to ban explicit music and video games) but that movement succeeded at all its goals and dissipated. Its notions about the relationship between an individual and the state have been mostly accepted by Democrats and even the Democratic Party leadership. (Remember Tipper and Hilary going after violent/explicit media in the 1990s? They haven’t said a peep post Newtown. It’s a non-starter now.)

    So with that movement having trickled into the Dem party ranks as memories of the Dems as censorship party fade (and the success of the GLBT political movement give the Dems that righteous smell), what’s left is the Koch-funded tax-revolt Randian mememe no taxes crap. Oh, and some child molesters. To put a veneer on the effort they associate themselves with some theorists on land ownership/economics whose notions are not even 1/10th as radical and anarchist as what they pretend to espouse.

    Since the left-libertarian movement was not very deep, more of a reaction, not to say there weren’t books and articles on the subject, and slogans, such as ‘victimless crime’, and erstwhile champions such as Dershowitz at one point, it didn’t bestow any sort of intellectual structure that glibertarians can point to. All they have is Rand, really, and that ain’t much. It’s not one of those movements with a big philosophical literature so that even a dumbass can sound smart (for a while) by parroting it. Well, I mean except for that ‘real’ libertarianism I mentioned above, probably too dry and boring and not mememememe enough for the Ronulans and the Randroids. Probably about as accurate as comparing Neoliberal economics to liberals.

  136. not a gator said,

    January 8, 2013 at 23:50

    bbfk, so it’s taking the piss, I guess?

    I do know that Jeter is a big ahole. I just can’t rouse myself to laugh heartily at Jersey jokes, given that I live in Florida. :P

    Also, the best pizza I ever had in my life was in Elizabethtown, New Jersey. The tomato sauce was to die for.

  137. not a gator said,

    January 8, 2013 at 23:52

    OBS said Interrogating the dominant paradigm.

    Just for you. And because Anne Rice once ejected, “You’re interrogating this text from the wrong perspective,” and it gave me joy. It did.

    She said it on Amazon.com. Savor.

  138. Thread Bear said,

    January 8, 2013 at 23:53

    tentesticles – where you go to testesfy.

  139. Major Kong said,

    January 8, 2013 at 23:53

    If you’re a god-botherer, B5 is not the show for you. (If you’re an atheist, though, the show is kind of awesome.)

    I guess I’m neither but I still loved B5.

  140. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:00

    If I do, Guerrilla Voters Cadre 18 will NOT be happy signing up with Democratic cheerleaders / apologists….

    Have you seen GOS’s comment section lately? Between the GOP and anarchist trolls, there’s a few Obots fighting ineffectually against HESWORSETHANBUSHHESOLDUSOUT, people who with a straight face say you object verbally to enemies but if your friends don’t GIVEYOUASPARKLEPONY, knife ‘em in the back. And there are some FDL-types who are suspicious of everything the Kenyan Usurper Does and are convinced that this, time, for real, he’s going to take our guns, send dissenters to FEMA camps, cut Social Security.

    You know what kills me? FDR compromised like crazy with the Confederates in his party. Sold blacks up the river on SS*, sold the Jews up the river during the war, sent Japanese-Americans to concentration camps even though the USSC said it was wrong. But Obama is selling us out? Pants-wetter, please.

    *FDR did manage to do enough good things to overcome how disastrous Wilson had been for African-Americans, plus Coolidge had kinda been a disappointment. Party identification shifted during that period. But he still gave tons of shit away. Some he had to… some he didn’t.

  141. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:01

    If you’re a serious god-botherer, there’s Bibleman.

    Almost tempted to watch to see how many of the male leads seem gay.

  142. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:03

    Pupienus said,

    January 8, 2013 at 22:12

    Speaking of gays and sports, http://imgur.com/a/U8VdV

    Don’t even try to tell me Parsons isn’t thinking “I want to tap that, so bad.”

    Oh wow, lol.

  143. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:11

    i know…and they claim that it’s OUR fault and OUR intolerance and OUR hate that makes us so full of rage…but that is the way it is in the “i-got-mine-fuck-you-but-nobody-better-do-anything-the-slightest-bit-offensive-to-me-or-my-family-or-by-god-i-will-either-shoot-them-or-lobby-for-a-law-against-it-because-i’m-an-exceptional-individualistic-fuck” mind…

    It’s really just out of the delegitimizer’s handbook. Your passion is used against you to say you’re irrational (or driven by “rage” in this case) and their side is logical. It’s the bully’s handbook.

  144. tigris said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:11

    What I want to know is how those religious customs got into my breeches in the first place.

    I think we all want to know that now. With details and highly intricate wood cut illustrations.

  145. Chris said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:11

    Yeah – though it’s true that “religion survives into the future” is mainstream sci-fi like I said, it’s also true that it often doesn’t get portrayed especially favorably, especially the fundie kind. Even BSG had an episode to make it clear what it thought of the anti-abortion crowd. And, of course, there’s my longtime favorite, Stargate…

    Still haven’t seen most of B5, but giving it another shot right now. Got halfway through BSG and may go back to it at some point – though there was one episode in Season 2 (the one with the TV crew that starts out being pissed off at a recent incident where troops shot civilians, but ends up being shamed into basically doing an army recruitment commercial) that left such a godawful taste in my mouth, that alone might deter me from going back to it.

    Firefly was frankly misunderstood by a good deal of its fandom. Witness all the claims that Firefly advocates libertarianism.

    Easy mistake to make if you haven’t seen the rest of Whedon’s work, due to the heavy post-Civil War vibe.

    There was actually a fairly cool Balloon Juice thread a couple months ago with some arguing about Firefly and libertarianism… The point was made that you can definitely see Firefly as libertarian if you look at the universe from Mal and Zoe’s point of view. But if you look at it objectively, life is shitty enough in the outer planets that you have to ask yourself if their Lost Cause is all it’s cracked up to be. Especially if you figure that the people running and financing the Independent cause were probably the same Petty Tyrants of the Week (Rance Burgess, Magistrate Higgins, Atherton Wing) that Mal was fighting in the TV show – they’re the ones who’d have the most to lose from a having a bigger fish moving into their little fiefdoms.

  146. bbkf said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:12

    It’s the bully’s handbook.

    OH! that’s right out of the alinsky playbook to say that!!!

  147. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:15

    Remember, in those days U.S. senators were elected by state legislatures, and the use of initiatives and referendums were much more limited than they are now. So the “drys” just had to lobby state legislatures as opposed to appealing to the electorate as a whole.

    It was also an about-face by elites. It was said recently that the elites get most of their issues heard by Congress, the rest of us, not so much. I read “The Way We Were.” Guy worked for Harpers in the 1920′s, middle class when the middle class was much smaller, rubbed shoulders with plenty of the truly wealthy. They naively thought this Prohibition thing was a go (Mencken did not, and built a bunker for a nicely-laid in alcohol supply which he supposed would survive the repeal of Prohibition, and he was right). Then it all blew up in their face.

  148. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:15

    OH! that’s right out of the alinsky playbook to say that!!!

    A J00 behind every rhetorical assertion!

  149. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:17

    You’re making me feel all left out, B4.Snif.

    Never, Suezboo! There’s a reason I wrote: “Hi, Southern portion of the Eastern Hemisphere peeps!” And you, my love, are that reason. I could never let the Kiwis and Aussies take all the accolades!

  150. Chris said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:22

    During the last season, which absolutely nobody watched, not even when somebody helpfully uploaded it to YouTube, there is actually an episode which shines a candle on xenophobia (even race riots), but that was long after the damage had been done.

    The Terra Prime episodes? Those deserved their own, much longer story arc, if not their own entire series (even if the rest of that show was objectively horrific).

    It’s one of the only moments when I’ve seen a sci-fi show dwell on just what a massive ideological crisis the Earth would go through if it made first contact with an alien race, and all the fallout that would come from it. Most of these shows just fast-forward from the present day to the moment when we’re trading and interacting with aliens as casually as we interact between nations today. In real life, I suspect the reaction for most humans would be more like the hysteria you saw back in the days when people thought witches were real. Think how long it’s taken for us to accept just something as basic as “all humans are created equal,” and how much progress we still have to make just on that front. Then factor in the fact that this would be an actually different species, not just humans-with-different-pigmentation…

    I know, it’s all just TV, supposed to be fun and all that. Still, I’d love to see a sci-fi show that was about what would happen if we ever made contact.

  151. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:24

    NPH has already gay-ed up cartoonish super-villainy! How is WND going to function now?

    Silly, they think President Obama is a gay cartoon supervillain.

  152. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:24

    I thought District 9 (if that’s the name I’m thinking of) was a decent portrayal of how we might deal with aliens.

  153. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:26

    “I was at work last year when a coworker was watching the news and said, ‘What’s rape anymore? You can’t stick your finger in someone without it being rape.’”

    The obvious rejoinder to this is, “So it’s okay if someone sticks their finger in your ass?”

  154. Chris said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:27

    because he wrote this awesome pilot for a network show that got canned and basically is not JJ Abrams even though Abrams turns everything into shit

    Alias: bleargh.

    Cloverfield: bleargh.

    Lost: from what I understand, bleargh.

    Star Trek: not bad for what it is, but when compared with the Star Trek TOS movies, bleargh.

    Mission: Impossible 3 and 4: actually, I’ll give him those ones. Well, at least 3.

  155. Chris said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:33

    but that movement succeeded at all its goals and dissipated.

    Really? A lot of its goals, but the war on drugs is still going strong (and disastrously), and now we’ve got the war on terror which is that on steroids. I sure wouldn’t mind a left-libertarian movement right now.

    You know what kills me? FDR compromised like crazy with the Confederates in his party. Sold blacks up the river on SS*, sold the Jews up the river during the war, sent Japanese-Americans to concentration camps even though the USSC said it was wrong. But Obama is selling us out? Pants-wetter, please.

    *FDR did manage to do enough good things to overcome how disastrous Wilson had been for African-Americans, plus Coolidge had kinda been a disappointment. Party identification shifted during that period. But he still gave tons of shit away. Some he had to… some he didn’t.

    Good points all. And heck, there were plenty of people on the left who thought FDR was selling us up the river to the Republicans/robber barons too, by moving to save capitalism rather than replace it.

    I rate FDR neutral on race. Not a flaming racist like Wilson, but not a civil rights supporter like Truman either. It’s not until Harry that the Democratic Party finally took the form that I identify with today.

  156. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:33

    My favorite cetacean is the Sperm Whale

    Fenwick, you should check out this episode of Inside Nature’s Giants- it’s a dissection of a beached sperm whale- such precision surgical tools as chainsaws and front-end loaders are involved.

  157. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:34

    I could never let the Kiwis and Aussies take all the accolades!

    They already have all the Orcs and Hobbitses, they can’t have all the accolades too!

  158. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:34

    There was actually a fairly cool Balloon Juice thread a couple months ago with some arguing about Firefly and libertarianism… The point was made that you can definitely see Firefly as libertarian if you look at the universe from Mal and Zoe’s point of view.

    Here’s my thing: being a smuggler is not libertarianism. Libertarianism, as most commonly formulated today, advocates that much of the modern apparatus of the state can pass away and that all the goods of modern society will continue to be provided by the free market and the innovations of jerb cremators, blazeh squaw, blazeh squaw. Whereas smugglers are societal parasites on the edges of disfunctional and/or corrupt governments. The world of Firefly reminds one of Central Europe on the 19th century, with an extremely authoritarian and brutal yet wealthy central government (Austria) attempting to expand militarily into weak states (German Staaten, Denmark at one point) some of which are messes (Ottoman Turk territories) where the lives of ordinary people are very insecure… but arguably becoming an Austrian subject and being pressed into military service (Good Soldier Švejk) is worse. In this world, living on a tiny smuggling ship affords them a sort of freedom and security they would not have on a world. Because society has broken down.

    It would seem to me that Whedon is criticizing two extremes: the Galtian paradises (where the crew nearly gets killed several times over) and the authoritarian uber-state, completely obsessed with military domination.

    Heck, doesn’t the whole Jane-hat episode say that the rabble are sheeple, that their lives suck so damn much that they’ve made a heroic legend out of an accident because they desperately need hope in their lives? Yeah, sounds like the libertarian dream.

    Now I guess he could be saying that life in a sanitized, social-democratic state is boring… taken out of context. Since such a state doesn’t exist to the best of my knowledge in the show, although some worlds are definitely more stable than others, it’s kind of hard to say.

  159. Chris said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:36

    They naively thought this Prohibition thing was a go (Mencken did not, and built a bunker for a nicely-laid in alcohol supply which he supposed would survive the repeal of Prohibition, and he was right). Then it all blew up in their face.

    The war on drugs has been as much of a disaster as Prohibition if not more, but it’s gone on for fifty years – because fuck the facts, man – and is still going strong. That’s why it surprises and impresses me that the about-face happened.

  160. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:44

    Really? A lot of its goals, but the war on drugs is still going strong (and disastrously), and now we’ve got the war on terror which is that on steroids. I sure wouldn’t mind a left-libertarian movement right now.

    They’ve won the argument, what’s left of the war is a police action. A majority in CA overturned their 3-strikes law. There’s momentum gathering to remove mandatory sentencing. Majorities in multiple states have repudiated tough penalties or any penalties for marijuana use. The police state is starting to be looked upon as a racket for Wackenhut and other prison operators. Fresh energy is being poured into the stop&frisk problem in NYC, including the governor.

    Left-libertarians don’t exist as a separate movement because a majority of Dems and Independents totally agree with them now. They won the argument and the other side lost.

    Who is in the minority? Well, people who think Gitmo should be closed down. People who want to de-escalate the security state. And that is what is fueling a lot of dissent on the left, center (independents), and even the right (economic libertarians who are also pissed about pat-downs at the airport). To the extent there’s some sort of movement, that’s it, but it has such fragmented and fractured support versus what is perceived as strong popular distaste that it’s snapping from the fringes.

  161. Smut Clyde said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:46

    “So it’s okay if someone sticks their finger in your ass?”
    Prostate-exam comments are so last-thread.

  162. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:47

    That’s why it surprises and impresses me that the about-face happened.

    Well, another issue was economics and social unrest. “Beer and bonus!” The elite didn’t want to pay the bonus, but beer–oh, sure. The war on drugs happened during a period of unprecedented American prosperity. Not only did people look the other way, but the negative costs were hidden by economic growth. Today, it’s often addressed in monetary terms–revenues lost through prohibition, heavy costs incurred. I think it’s no accident that these reversals coincided with severe economic recessions.

  163. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:52

    I liked Alien Nation.

  164. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 9, 2013 at 0:58

    Instead of putting them in Sadlytown, perhaps I should follow the Major’s lead and put them in diaries at the Great Orange Satan? If I do, Guerrilla Voters Cadre 18 will NOT be happy signing up with Democratic cheerleaders / apologists….

    I keep telling you, old chum, start your own blog- you get to write about subjects that interest you, free from editorial control, and you can play with embedding whatever graphics you find to enhance your post. You can compose your posts at leisure, saving the drafts as necessary. You don’t have to fret about seeming to tacitly support another person’s views. DO IT! It’s exactly what you are looking for. You don’t have to put up a post every day, you can split extremely long articles into two posts- just jump right in, I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords would be happy to link to you.

  165. Chris said,

    January 9, 2013 at 1:01

    Here’s my thing: being a smuggler is not libertarianism.

    Not being a smuggler – being an Independent. The Browncoat cause, near as we can tell, is defending a way of life that’s at least as shitty as what exists in the inner systems, all under the mantle of a vaguely anti-government ideology that doesn’t really seem to have a plan for dealing with the oppression of the local feudal lords.

    It would seem to me that Whedon is criticizing two extremes: the Galtian paradises (where the crew nearly gets killed several times over) and the authoritarian uber-state, completely obsessed with military domination.

    Yeah, I buy that. Although the Blue Sun angle makes it seem like there’s a Galtian element to the Alliance too. If the show had been allowed to develop, I always figured the Alliance would’ve turned out to be a cyberpunk-style dystopia with corporations having the real power… although with a union between state and corporate power (like in fascism or modern China), as opposed to the lawlessness on the frontier.

  166. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 9, 2013 at 1:02

    The police state is starting to be looked upon as a racket for Wackenhut and other prison operators

    Ain’t that the truth! It also removes a lot of urban minority voters from the voting roles (sometimes permanently), and it funnels them from densely populated regions to rural populations, skewing the population counts for purposes of representation. It’s also a “jobs program’ for rural areas (upstate New York is home to a lot of prisons). It’s a win-win situation for both corporations and the Republican party.

  167. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 1:03

    How could homosexuals possibly get any pleasure from watching muscular men in extremely tight pants bending over

    Relevant.

    How are they not afraid of getting junkpunched? They’re wearing helmets on their heads.

    *cue Apocalypse Now reference

  168. Chris said,

    January 9, 2013 at 1:12

    I liked Alien Nation.

    By the looks of the Wikipedia, that may be worth checking out.

    District 9, yeah, that too.

    And of course, the various V shows.

  169. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 1:15

    Yeah, I buy that. Although the Blue Sun angle makes it seem like there’s a Galtian element to the Alliance too. If the show had been allowed to develop, I always figured the Alliance would’ve turned out to be a cyberpunk-style dystopia with corporations having the real power… although with a union between state and corporate

    Yes, quite possible, given how privileged and isolated Simon and River’s upbringing was.

  170. J Neo Marvin said,

    January 9, 2013 at 1:24

    “That’s why we’re launching PastorFashion.com. We want to set the trends,” he added.

    The Fashion Of The Christ.

  171. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 1:24

    Though I think that’s less “Galtian” (the fantasy) than just plutocracy/oligarchy, much like the communist fantasy versus the Stalinist reality. Earth as run by the Bilderberg group: the future is here, it’s just not evenly distributed.

    Chris, when you say “independent” I think you are conflating libertarian’s real social goals with their stated ones. Libertarian rhetoric is about a glorious future populated by supermen who don’t need a state bureaucracy, which withers away. Libertarian groups in fact advocate for a parasitical existence, in which certain groups can benefit from the goods of society while others pay for them–in coin or in blood. A libertarian will never admit advocating for this and most ‘net libertarians seem to me to have swallowed the blue pill and think that good shit will happen if we: end the fed, go to gold standard, eliminate environmental regulations, eliminate minimum wage, etc, etc. They also think they will benefit personally even though they self-evidently will not. (Many of them have Asperger’s, a social-learning syndrome which severely disadvantages them in an environment with high unemployment and at-will employment. They don’t realize that many have their supposedly in-demand skills, and that being a white male is not a “skill” and getting ride of the Civil Rights Act is not going to put that genie back into the box. Business elites don’t care what your color is, drone, but DO care if you’re causing trouble in the cubicles with your offensive rantings.)

  172. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 1:28

    Pastors aren’t typically known for their fashion. Most people don’t think of the runway leading up to the pulpit. But why not?!

    Dude must not be conversant with Black churches.

  173. Major Kong said,

    January 9, 2013 at 1:31

    upstate New York is home to a lot of prisons

    Fishkill has three prisons. I figure half the population of Fishkill is locked up and the other half is getting paid to watch them.

  174. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 1:32

    The chances of catching one in the Jimmy are really kinda slim, but you try to make a cut, or “cross step”, and that fucker will feel like it severed a groin tendon. I’ve hit the deck like the proverbial sack of wet cement. Done for the day. Not a soul within ten yards.
    Goaltending? Yes, but that’s a whole different piece of equipment. Heavy padding everywhere.

    Maybe–just maybe–I’m going out on a limb here–cups shouldn’t be made with hard plastic.

    You now how like corsets were made with whalebone and totally sucked but now they have these wonderbras and compression garments that vain idiots have to have? Let’s apply that modern technology to the cup: spandex, padding (to reduce impulse at point of contact), breathability, flexibility (no more cutting into tendons), support.

    You could take shin guards as an example. They’ve moved away from the insertable plastic pieces.

    Like a car: crumple zone, not meat cleaver.

  175. Major Kong said,

    January 9, 2013 at 1:32

    I really liked District 9.

  176. Chris said,

    January 9, 2013 at 1:33

    Sure. With respect to the show, it’s just that I think the Indies buy into the libertarian rhetoric pretty well, especially Mal with his “governments are for getting in a man’s way” spiel (which doesn’t mean I think Whedon was writing a libertarian manifesto). Course, maybe Mal’s just judging “government” in general simply based on the only government he knows, the Alliance, which is admittedly doesn’t give him much reason to have faith.

    With regards to real life, definitely agree. Especially this –

    They don’t realize that many have their supposedly in-demand skills, and that being a white male is not a “skill” and getting ride of the Civil Rights Act is not going to put that genie back into the box. Business elites don’t care what your color is, drone, but DO care if you’re causing trouble in the cubicles with your offensive rantings.

    No, getting rid of civil rights isn’t going to put the genie back, is it? But believing that “the invisible hand” has you destined for success and the only reason you’re not getting it is because liberals have unfairly biased the job market towards blacks with their affirmative action gives them a rather wonderful rationalization for why there’s nothing wrong with them and everything is someone else’s fault.

  177. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 1:35

    I remain convinced that Mr. Harris is full of both pep AND vim!

    not to mention vigor and a healthy dose of vavoom!

    23 skidoo and Neil Patrick Harris too?

  178. bbkf said,

    January 9, 2013 at 1:43

    Giving religious leaders secular power fashion tips is just a power play faaaaaabulous!

  179. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 1:44

    Most everybody I knew in baseball had a story of the last day they elected to forego the junkbucket… mine starts with the all too common line drive to short left field and an unseen bump under the grass, and then darkness… ending with awakening in the emergency room. Da boys didn’t come out of hiding for two days.

    Sounds like my baseball mouthguard story, except that it happened in practice. Well, softball. Which is neither “soft” nor … well, you get the point.

  180. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 1:48

    especially Mal with his “governments are for getting in a man’s way” spiel (which doesn’t mean I think Whedon was writing a libertarian manifesto).

    Ah, well spotted. You see, I took Mal to be an unreliable narrator and hence didn’t take his philosophical pronouncements too seriously. He was an opportunist with a bit of a decent human being at his core, much too preoccupied with day-to-day survival to think too deeply about how he got there. Live served him a bunch of shit and he managed to barbeque it and make it not taste so bad. That’s kind of how I see him. Also as a ripoff of Cowboy Bebop.

  181. bbkf said,

    January 9, 2013 at 1:48

    compression garments that vain idiots have to have?

    hey now!

  182. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 1:51

    But believing that “the invisible hand” has you destined for success and the only reason you’re not getting it is because liberals have unfairly biased the job market towards blacks with their affirmative action gives them a rather wonderful rationalization for why there’s nothing wrong with them and everything is someone else’s fault.

    A friend enemy acquaintance of mine just got slapped in the mouth with this last month. He’s too pitiable for me to feel any Schadenfreude about it. But IPC forbid he had real power, [as]* he would be the most insufferable jackhole on the block.

    *just for you Fenwick, just for you

  183. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 1:52

    sorry, I forgot about medically necessary compression garments

  184. bbkf said,

    January 9, 2013 at 1:53

    Well, softball. Which is neither “soft” nor … well, you get the point.

    i was on a softball team for one season…one terrifying long-ass season…i was super good at batting, but it’s the other stuff that i sucked at…hence me getting my gouged up knee washed off with old milwaukee and bandaged with a scrap of t-shirt because i had no the skills or coordination to slide into third properly…also, too…that ball is scary!

    poor daughter, along with her other skill issues, also inherited my fear of flying spherical objects…when she was about four or five, we talked her into joining the local way little league team…she had more of an ‘honorary’ position of ‘pitcher’…first kid up to bat drove a line drive right at her…hit her in the gut and she has not played any sort of ball ever again…except for the occasional game of horse in the backyard…

  185. bbkf said,

    January 9, 2013 at 1:55

    sorry, I forgot about medically necessary compression garments

    no…more like cellulite necessary…

  186. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 1:57

    I still take it back, it was an insensitive thing to say… still find it kind of silly… especially Wunderbars

    but i iz not ‘specially into titties

    babby-feeding devices, they iz

    labias, otoh

  187. bbkf said,

    January 9, 2013 at 1:58

    …i meant a smooth silhouette is quite important in the fast paced world of business…yeah…that’s what i meant…

  188. bbkf said,

    January 9, 2013 at 2:00

    especially Wunderbars

    right? they look extremely uncomfy to me…most bras are monstrous cages of discomfort, but what’s a girl to do…don’t want to trip on the things (that was for tigris’ benefit (do your boobs hang low?))

  189. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 2:00

    Doogie Howser ended twenty years ago. How I Met Your Mother has been in the top three sitcoms for the past eight years. And in this new media world where teevees is getting left behind, d00d has almost five million Twitter followers and an online puppet series.

    DKW, for what it’s worth (your mom), I know NPH from DOCTOR HORRIBLE.

    Sure, I’d heard of Doogie Howser at the time it came out, but I never watched it.

    He was in some movies, too, that I also didn’t see.

  190. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 2:03

    They call that a meltdown??? I once saw a liberal woman, when confronted about her views, start talking about her red dress. Liberals meltdowns are considered normal because they are almost all mentally ill. When conservatives get a little emotional it’s very unusual because they are mostly normal.

    This is a joke, right? She “once saw” a woman talking about redress and now knows all liberals are nuts?

    Vulcans are right-wing conservatives?

    Well, if the robe helmet hair fits.

  191. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 2:04

    most bras are monstrous cages of discomfort

    word… pretty sure that’s the real reason 70′s women burned them… also fashions changed, and nobody wants to look like a Left Behind loser

  192. bbkf said,

    January 9, 2013 at 2:07

    gdang it…i just gave meself an earworm!

  193. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 2:18

    man, those steubenville links gave me a rage meltdown. thanks for nothin’, sadlies.

  194. tigris said,

    January 9, 2013 at 2:32

    Personally mine are more clementine than pomelo, but with the right bra I can shelve books, maybe even land aircraft. I thought it looked pretty fierce but it turns out the husbanator prefers the girls to roam free.

  195. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 9, 2013 at 2:40

    man, those steubenville links gave me a rage meltdown. thanks for nothin’, sadlies.

    Yepper.
    Five mile trudge through melting snow, and finding a big ol’ UPS package* on the doorstep when I got back helped a little.
    This turned into quite the innerstin thread also, too. Too bad I have no idea what youse guys were talkin’ ’bout. Maybe I’ll check some of these skiffy shows out now that my NEW** COMPUTER ARRIVED!!
    I’m waiting for all of the Antichrist created ebil softwareWindoze updates to finish. It’s been five years or so since I’ve had a squeaky clean OS to deal with. Gonna be saaweet!
    I would be all excited about soft/compression/non-carving scrotum shields, but the chances of me doing anything remotely athletic are none, and none.
    I’m done, thankyewverramuch.

    *Thanks be to the Major’s comrades for bringing it to me all safe and sound like.
    **It’s a refurbish. Hella cheap.

  196. Fenwick said,

    January 9, 2013 at 3:14

    I took Mal to be an unreliable narrator

    Hmmmm. I never thought of that possibility. The ‘unreliable narrator’ is subtle device. Television seems like a difficult medium in which to use it, because most viewers are far more familiar with ‘reliable’ narration; they may not ‘get it’ at first. And ‘at first’ is crucial to TV programs trying to build an audience base.

    I vastly enjoy the ‘unreliable narrator’ device in novels. Two skillful comedic examples are Charles Kinbote in Nabokov’s Pale Fire and ‘Word’ Smith in Philip Roth’s Great American Novel.

    I highly recommend the latter to baseball fans immersed in the game and its history and lore: ‘Word’ Smith, supposedly an elderly retired sportswriter with an addiction to alliteration, tells the deranged story of the ‘Patriot League’, its fall, and the vast conspiracy of silence about its existence. (The name of Roth’s narrator is a hat-tip to Nabokov’s book: Kinbote is a professor of literature at ‘Wordsmith College’).

  197. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 3:15

    Agreed about refurbs. They’re like magic or sump’in’.

  198. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 3:24

    So if anyone is lacking for rage, check out former AIG boss suing US gov on 5th amendment claims.

  199. John Revolta said,

    January 9, 2013 at 3:44

    *Trying to work up something with “red dress of grievances”.*

    Crap. I got nothin’. Is Festivus over?

  200. Chris said,

    January 9, 2013 at 3:51

    You see, I took Mal to be an unreliable narrator and hence didn’t take his philosophical pronouncements too seriously. He was an opportunist with a bit of a decent human being at his core, much too preoccupied with day-to-day survival to think too deeply about how he got there. Live served him a bunch of shit and he managed to barbeque it and make it not taste so bad. That’s kind of how I see him.

    That’s a good way to see him, I think.

    Also as a ripoff of Cowboy Bebop.

    And Han Solo. With no controversy at all about whether or not he shot first.

  201. VCarlson said,

    January 9, 2013 at 3:52

    right? they look extremely uncomfy to me…most bras are monstrous cages of discomfort, but what’s a girl to do…don’t want to trip on the things

    When I was in college (in the 1970s), I went jogging -once- without one. I figured, not very big, so no prob, right? Thought I was gonna die. Even my itty bitties need the support, or the compression (athletic bras are comfy, not an indication I regard sex as a competition, as some know-nothing once opined in the paper).

  202. Chris said,

    January 9, 2013 at 3:52

    So if anyone is lacking for rage,

    In this country, with my interests? It’ll be some time before that happens.

    check out former AIG boss suing US gov on 5th amendment claims.

    I did see that! Best review I’ve heard yet – “this is like the French suing the Americans for messing up their beaches in Normandy.”

  203. Major Kong said,

    January 9, 2013 at 3:52

    Trying to work up something with “red dress of grievances”.

    Red’s not really my color.

  204. Fenwick said,

    January 9, 2013 at 4:12

    those steubenville links gave me a rage meltdown.

    This. I bellowed ferocious strings of curse words while reading it. Feelin’ stabby ain’t in it.

    This turned into quite the innerstin thread also, too.

    Definitely! (Spayshul h/t to Chris and not-a-gator.)

  205. Secretary Generalissimo Fidel F. Kerry Esq. said,

    January 9, 2013 at 4:20

    Who among us doesn’t love trial lawyers and lawsuits? I voted for them before I voted against them.

    Still reporting for duty with a saucy salute!

  206. Chris said,

    January 9, 2013 at 4:34

    Major? A line in your diary

    His missiles may even have trouble locking on if you get right down in the dirt.

    triggered an old question you might know the answer to -

    In this day and age, planes don’t really dogfight anymore, right? Most of the killing is done with missiles fired from so far away the planes don’t even see each other, let alone do any of the Top Gun style dogfighting with each other, right? So why do we even have fighters anymore? If we want to blow airplanes out of the sky, why don’t we just take much bigger airplanes like B-52s, load them up with air-to-air missiles (which I’m assuming they could carry a lot more of than any fighter) and just turn them into gunships?

    Random question from someone who finds aircraft interesting but doesn’t know all that much about them.

  207. jim the heretical anti-cliff lemming said,

    January 9, 2013 at 4:39

    NEW** COMPUTER ARRIVED!!

    Congratulations! Ain’t technology a hoot?

    It’s been five years or so since I’ve had a squeaky clean OS to deal with. Gonna be saaweet!

    Heh … second time in about a month for me.

    Even though I wasn’t having any problems or issues with 12.10, I just reverted Ye Olde Laptoposaurus back to the original 12.04 LTS yesterday, partly for the extra two years of support, but mostly on a whim (RUN BATSHITINSANE.EXE). Fickle monster didn’t want to do a proper installation until I figured out that I had to detach my external HD for it to work.

    Whew!

    Ohhhh yeah, very deliciously saaweet it is indeed.

    My two bits’ worth = if you don’t have one, get an external drive with fucktons of memory (mine is 500GB but even 1-2TB drives are reasonably cheap now) & keep all your saved goodies on it, leaving the core beast’s memory wide open for updates & software. Mine is about three years old & it’s still only about half full. Also too: for anyone running Windoze, I heartily recommend Sandboxie – it not only keeps your Internet Love Machine clear of nefarious input but also prevents it from accumulating all kinds of digital cruft if you run your browser inside it. I’m consistently amazed by how much sludge Firefox can build up in a short time.

  208. Major Kong said,

    January 9, 2013 at 4:40

    From what I’m told, a 4-ship of F-22s when they’re working the way they’re supposed to are pretty much unbeatable.

    Their only limitation is how many missiles they can carry.

    There is actually talk of putting missiles on other other airplanes that the F-22s could then target and launch remotely.

    The strength of the F-22 isn’t so much its dogfighting abilities (which are very impressive) but the way it’s data-linked into the entire “battlespace” as they call it.

  209. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 9, 2013 at 5:04

    get an external drive with fucktons of memory (mine is 500GB but even 1-2TB drives are reasonably cheap now)

    All planned for next month. Probs 2GB or more. This particular beastie is slated to be a strictly fer Photoshop workhorse, so storage is gonna be prime. It came with 4GB and a 750GB HD. That ain’t gonna quite get it, so more RAM and an external same time I get a serious graphics card. Second monitor this summer.
    I won’t be getting online all that much with it. Updates mostly, so I just stuck a Cisco adaptor in it for now*. It can bounce back and forth between the pic monster and the old gal, who now will be repurposed into a jukebox. I’ll use this old Lenovo laptop (best damn purchase I’ve ever made. I’ve dropped it, spilled beer in it, etc., etc. and she keeps pluggin’ along) for surfing.

    * I love this little tourist town. You can’t go anywhere without tripping over free WI-FI !

  210. Major Kong said,

    January 9, 2013 at 5:09

    I’ve got a 1 TB drive. I reckon that thing will hold a lot of pr0n.

  211. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 9, 2013 at 5:13

    Umm, I meant 2TB or more, this crap is moving too fast for me. I remember my 486 DX2 being a screamer. 400 ENTIRE MB of HD !!! How the hell could I POSSIBLY fill it???

  212. bbkf said,

    January 9, 2013 at 5:24

    but it turns out the husbanator prefers the girls to roam free.

    ditto…i used to be a bra sleeper until he nagged and nagged and mocked and mocked…now i let the girls out whenever i am at home and not planning on leaving…

    I went jogging -once- without one

    oooh…yipes…pain AND chafing…woohoo!

    also, too…i always thought of you until male…and if you actually are, moobs are nothing to be ashamed of…we will not judge…

  213. bbkf said,

    January 9, 2013 at 5:29

    *Trying to work up something with “red dress of grievances”.*

    Crap. I got nothin’. Is Festivus over?

    ‘whatcha wearing for festivus?’

    ‘duh…red dress of grievances…’

  214. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 5:45

    PENIS?

    warning: the creature is dead and the above-thread-mentioned chainsaws may have been in use.

  215. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 5:46

    Note: that’s all I could find on YouTube of the Sperm Whale episode what with country detection and “this content not licensed for your area” and fascism, that’s what.

  216. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 5:46

    ‘duh…red dress of grievances…’

    that be thread-winnin’ material right thar, missy

  217. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 9, 2013 at 5:52

    I cannot decide whether dinner and a movie with that young lady would be a good, or bad decision.

  218. Pupienus said,

    January 9, 2013 at 6:00

    “this is like the French suing the Americans for messing up their beaches in Normandy.”

    Pray tell, to whom shall I send all the internets?

  219. John Revolta said,

    January 9, 2013 at 6:11

    PENIS?

    That’s it? pfffftt.

  220. bbkf said,

    January 9, 2013 at 6:16

    I cannot decide whether dinner and a movie with that young lady would be a good, or bad decision.

    well, she certainly knows how to handle it…

    Pray tell, to whom shall I send all the internets?

    i know! i cannot wait to use that one in conversation…

    that be thread-winnin’ material right thar, missy

    why, thank you…that’s a first for me! you like me, you really, really like me!!! and now, strangely, i feel compelled to buy a red dress…and some kick ass red heels…

  221. bbkf said,

    January 9, 2013 at 6:17

    also, too…BLOGWHORE!!!

    you must ALL go to my blog and follow directions…

  222. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 7:01

    ot randomicity, but it’s a shame they can’t remake the original Devilman as a movie

    seems like you could tell this story in two hours

    oh yeah, i forgot, cartoons are for kids and you can never, ever tell kids that war sucks

  223. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 7:02

    That’s it? pfffftt.

    That poor researcher, she was promised there would be more there…

    epic foreskin, though. Well, some of us think so, anyway. hmmf!

  224. not a gator said,

    January 9, 2013 at 7:06

    WHALE SPERM

    Go to about minute 24, and try to overlook the anthropomorphizing of heterosexual behavior and the pathologizing of homosexual behavior.

  225. Cerberus said,

    January 9, 2013 at 7:34

    There will be a new post in 10…9…8…

  226. Cerberus said,

    January 9, 2013 at 7:35

    And new post.

  227. smut clyde said,

    January 9, 2013 at 10:18

    I remember my 486 DX2 being a screamer.
    Upon further reflection I’m gonna file that under “Too much information”.

  228. Kobie said,

    January 16, 2013 at 5:26

    Super Bowl is two words.

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