Dec
31

It’s All Been Downhill Since The Crusades




Posted at 19:59 by Tintin

james_lyons
ABOVE: Admiral James Lyons (Ret.)

Shorter Adm. James Lyons (Ret.), The Moonie Times
Draft of new U.S. Army handbook must be scrapped

  • Now that Obama is turning the military into a bunch of gay, Muslim-loving wimps, it is no longer possible for the military to do its God-given job, namely, converting the Muslim heathens in Afghanistan to Christianity

I suppose no one is going to be surprised to learn that, according to Admiral Lyons, it all started with the gays

After the repeal of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,” the erosion of our military’s moral principles, regretfully, continues.

Let the fairies in the Army and the next thing you know the military will stop killing Muslims altogether.

A recent Wall Street Journal article described the U.S. Army’s final-draft handbook, which indoctrinates our military personnel heading to Afghanistan in how to be sensitive to and accept Muslim and Afghan 7th-century customs and values

What a preposterous notion. Everyone knows that the whole purpose of sending the military to Afghanistan is to convert the Afghans to 1st-century Christian values.

Also, U.S. military members must not discuss Islam in any form. All of this guidance is un-American. It is totally against our core principles and everything we stand for as Americans. It threatens to further diminish our military principles, stature and fighting spirit.

What could be more American than a soldier discussing Islam? And how can you expect him to fight if he can’t tell the Afghans that the Muslim religion sucks in comparison to the Christian religion which God deputized America to bring to the heathens, at gunpoint if necessary.

If this handbook directive is implemented, we will be forcing our military to submit to Islam and its governing Shariah law or die — exactly the choice offered to infidels who have been vanquished by jihad.

Every time anyone is nice to a Muslim, the terrorists win!

I also highly commend the comments to Admiral Lyons’s column, which are, as you might expect, a treasure trove of rotting mangoes. They start off with this gem from “Joe”:

When you have the likes of Barack Obama, reputedly a member of a homosexual men’s club in Chicago, along with Rahm Emmanuel, in charge of the US military, he’s going to try to turn it into one huge homosexual steambath in khaki.

Ah, if only this were true, I might even try to join up.


‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™


271 Comments »

  1. Major Kong said,

    December 31, 2012 at 20:02

    Sure glad he’s retired. Unfortunately there are probably plenty more where he came from.

  2. Chris said,

    December 31, 2012 at 20:17

    If this handbook directive is implemented, we will be forcing our military to submit to Islam and its governing Shariah law or die — exactly the choice offered to infidels who have been vanquished by jihad.

    And then

    When you have the likes of Barack Obama, reputedly a member of a homosexual men’s club in Chicago, along with Rahm Emmanuel, in charge of the US military, he’s going to try to turn it into one huge homosexual steambath in khaki.

    Yep… The military will submit to 7th century Sharia Law, and then it’ll turn into one big gay orgy, because that’s what 7th century Sharia Law is all about. Uh huh. Yep. Makes sense to me.

    I suppose it’s no different from people fifty years ago who thought JFK was an agent of the Vatican, but also an agent of the Kremlin. The more things change…

  3. J Neo Marvin said,

    December 31, 2012 at 20:24

    And the question remains: how is it that everyone knows that an influential newspaper in the nation’s capital is owned and operated by an insane mind-control cult based in another country, yet said paper remains influential? It would read like a particularly stupid conspiracy theory were it not for the fact that they are completely out in the open about this?

    Kinda puts all this wheezing about the threat of sharia law into perspective, doesn’t it?

    Of course, we live in times when flag-waving Confederate traitors are considered to be more patriotic than we are, so there ya go…

    Have a happy Gay Muslim Feminazi New Year, everyone!

  4. J Neo Marvin said,

    December 31, 2012 at 20:26

    One two many question marks in the above post. I blame the system.

  5. J Neo Marvin said,

    December 31, 2012 at 20:27

    One TOO many! Damn it!

  6. Gary Ruppert said,

    December 31, 2012 at 20:32

    The fact is, liberals, you reap what you sew. Gay power and muslims are acsendant in Obamas socialest republic, which is what ameria will become unless we fight back. We will never let liberals have our guns.

  7. Another Kiwi said,

    December 31, 2012 at 20:34

    “Ace” Lyons grifts for http://www.lionllc.com/ which is some high end crazy from the look of it and he’s had a thing against gays for some time.
    We need someone from Lawyers, Guns and Money to properly discuss these boats.

  8. J Neo Marvin said,

    December 31, 2012 at 20:37

    Gary Ruppert, is this you?

  9. Chris said,

    December 31, 2012 at 20:48

    Obamas socialest republic

    If only.

  10. Pupienus said,

    December 31, 2012 at 20:49

    Not to pick nits but those Xian values weren’t really fully settled until the 3rd or 4th century.

    Also happy New Year. Say, you upside downers – what’s 2013 like?

  11. Pupienus said,

    December 31, 2012 at 20:53

    When you have the likes of Barack Obama, reputedly a member of a homosexual men’s club in Chicago, along with Rahm Emmanuel, in charge of the US military, he’s going to try to turn it into one huge homosexual steambath in khaki.

    Rahm Emmanuel is in charge of the US military? The homosexual men’s club is in charge? Does Bette Midler have something to do with this?

  12. Chris said,

    December 31, 2012 at 21:04

    Not to pick nits but those Xian values weren’t really fully settled until the 3rd or 4th century.

    Out of curiosity, anyone know when abortion became a biggie for the Christian establishment? The Bible definitely doesn’t support their “a fetus is a human life like any other” stance. I know it came late (like, late last century) for a lot of our fundiegelicals, but the Catholics had been making a big deal out of it for a while longer.

  13. Pupienus said,

    December 31, 2012 at 21:09

    Chris, Teh wiki has a good rundown.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Catholic_Church_and_abortion

    Also see the link there to a page about the early church and abortion.

  14. Pupienus said,

    December 31, 2012 at 21:10

    C’mon, AK! I want to know what it’s like in the future! That is, after all, where we will spend most of our time.

  15. The Future said,

    December 31, 2012 at 21:19

    Army parades will be fabulous.

  16. Suezboo said,

    December 31, 2012 at 21:25

    I’ll let you know, Pup. Unfortunately, the sun is taking his goddam time and it is only 9:30 pm here.

  17. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

    December 31, 2012 at 21:36

    Say, you upside downers – what’s 2013 like?

    They’re all still drunk.
    ~

  18. Another Kiwi said,

    December 31, 2012 at 21:41

    Pup, I think we all were surprised by the return of the ice giants. They are some cranky old dudes, for sure.
    Similarly the Pope melting was a shock to many but all those candles should have been a warning to the Alpha Centaurians. Kathryn Jean-Lopez’s pledge to keep following the Pope “even though he was a mannequin controlled by inter-galactic gangsters” is, at least, consistent.
    Not many were expecting that Rupert Murdoch would turn out to be an avatar created by 14 year-old Dwayne Scrivitz from Boise, Idaho. But as Scrivitz has said “Fuck this, man. Dude was going all overtime an’ shit”
    New Zealand retains is special place as a tax haven for motion picture companies. The re-organisation of the provinces is expected to greatly enhance the process and we here in Manawatu Props, look forward to participating in this crazy business we call Show.
    Peace to you all

  19. Dr. BDH said,

    December 31, 2012 at 21:46

    Why would a homophobe purposely sign onto a lifeteme career of cruising for months at a time on a boat with a bunch of single, strapping young men?

  20. Dr. BDH said,

    December 31, 2012 at 21:46

    “Lifetime”

  21. Pupienus said,

    December 31, 2012 at 21:49

    Why would a homophobe purposely sign onto a lifeteme career of cruising for months at a time on a boat with a bunch of single, strapping young men?

    Scratch a homophobe, find a homo, I always say.

  22. Pupienus said,

    December 31, 2012 at 21:50

    Wowzers! Teh FURTURE is going to be fun!

  23. Smut Clyde said,

    December 31, 2012 at 21:58

    Say, you upside downers – what’s 2013 like?

    Full of hungry cats demanding breakfast. Also someone broke in at some point and strewed empty bottles all over the table.

  24. More Future said,

    December 31, 2012 at 21:59

    Well, after Debt Ceilings II, III, IV, and V there is precious little credit rating left, but the stock and bond markets are still going gangbusters.
    Lindsey Graham came out of the closet and nobody noticed. The filibuster rule in the Senate was not changed because Harry Reid feared he might need it to fend off the Republican minority. Several Kansas congressional districts were wiped clean of their constituents by tornadoes but have retained their Representatives in Congress. The President agrees to raise the Medicare and Social Security ages to 80 and to be a catamite for the Koch brothers, but Republicans in the House reject his proposal on the grounds that he submitted one.

  25. Spearhafoc, whose nym is Old English for "sparrowhawk" said,

    December 31, 2012 at 22:07

    This political cartoonist found a whole new way to be racist about Obama. I have to give him credit for that, I guess.

    I suppose it’s no different from people fifty years ago who thought JFK was an agent of the Vatican, but also an agent of the Kremlin. The more things change…

    Jack Chick believes that Communism was created by the Catholic Church so they could…do something. I’m a little fuzzy on the details.

  26. Ace-o-aces said,

    December 31, 2012 at 22:12

    Barack Obama, reputedly a member of a homosexual men’s club in Chicago

    I was wondering where this one came from, so I did a quick Google search. Apparently, the wingnuts have gotten it in their heads that the East Bank Club in Chicago (an ultra-high end health club for the rich and well connected. Basically an urban country club) is some kind of gay bath-house.

  27. Smut Clyde said,

    December 31, 2012 at 22:25

    From the future.

  28. Pupienus said,

    December 31, 2012 at 22:25

    Apparently, the wingnuts have gotten it in their heads that the East Bank Club in Chicago (an ultra-high end health club for the rich and well connected. Basically an urban country club) is some kind of gay bath-house.

    CAN YOU PROVE IT ISN’T?

    </whingnut>

  29. Green Eagle said,

    December 31, 2012 at 22:46

    What never serves to amaze me is the constant screaming by Republicans that Democrats are out to impose Sharia law on people, given that their stand that employers can impose their religious strictures on employees who want health insurance actually opens the door wide open for the imposition of Sharia law. I guess they just assume that the rights they claim for themselves will never be allowed for anyone they don’t like. Or maybe they are nothing but hypocritical liars.

  30. D Johnston said,

    December 31, 2012 at 22:49

    Hey, you left out the best part!

    For example, if our military personnel hear or witness an Afghan soldier sodomizing a young boy, the handbook tells U.S. service members to voice no objection, accept it or ignore it, or they could be killed. If an Afghan beats, rapes or kills a woman in the presence of a U.S. serviceman, they are not to interfere or stand up for women’s rights or else they might be killed.

    Sure, Admiral, that’s exactly what it means. For the record, the article (which isn’t linked in the Moonie Times, natch) mentions that women’s rights, homosexuality and pedophilia are topics not to be broached in conversation, but it obviously says nothing about allowing rape and murder.

    Oh, it also holds that the ANSF have “poor conflict resolution skills,” are prone to “irrational escalation of force” and at least some of them are “profoundly dishonest [with] no personal integrity.” Woo! Feel the appeasement.

  31. Thursday said,

    December 31, 2012 at 23:07

    What never serves to amaze me is the constant screaming by Republicans that Democrats are out to impose Sharia law on people, given that their stand that employers can impose their religious strictures on employees who want health insurance actually opens the door wide open for the imposition of Sharia law.

    But…but…but…Didn’t you know that the Republican Plan was to keep control of the House “in perpetuity”? Changing laws in favour of the party who controls the government couldn’t possibly backfire; so making religious reasoning legally binding couldn’t possibly come back and bite them in the ass.

  32. Pupienus said,

    December 31, 2012 at 23:10

    D Johnston said,
    December 31, 2012 at 22:49

    A whinger just makes shit up, omitting the link that would give the lie to his fevered psychotic rant? Nope, I just can’t believe that would ever happen.

  33. Stranger in a Strange Land said,

    December 31, 2012 at 23:12

    When you have the likes of Barack Obama, reputedly a member of a homosexual men’s club in Chicago, along with Rahm Emmanuel, in charge of the US military, he’s going to try to turn it into one huge homosexual steambath in khaki

    hmm Obama/Emmanuel slash fiction….I might just have to go taste those mangoes.

    PS Yes, I think Rahm Emmanuel’s hot. If that’s wrong, I don’t want to be right.

  34. bbkf said,

    December 31, 2012 at 23:16

    “Lifetime”

    enh…no, that’s more logo’s thang…

  35. Snorghagen said,

    December 31, 2012 at 23:44

    there is an insidious agenda at work

    Pernicious skulduggery is afoot.

  36. Thread Bear said,

    December 31, 2012 at 23:48

    Insidiuos Agenda – Band name

    Isidiuos Agenda at Work – Australian band name

  37. KWillow said,

    January 1, 2013 at 0:01

    We will never let liberals have our guns.

    Its a lot safer than giving them to each other. Liberals probably won’t shoot you, tho they’ll want to, of course.

  38. Suezboo said,

    January 1, 2013 at 0:04

    HAPPY NEW YEAR to all you Sadlies !
    So far, it’s hot and noisy. This could be an ongoing situation.

  39. Helmut Monotreme said,

    January 1, 2013 at 0:10

    Well, I’m about to sign off for the year, Happy New Year! See you all next year, and don’t forget to say hi if you find yourself in Madison.

  40. tigris said,

    January 1, 2013 at 0:59

    For example, if our military personnel hear or witness an Afghan soldier sodomizing a young boy, the handbook tells U.S. service members to voice no objection

    …except to make sure it adheres to the American standards for “enhanced interrogation,” right? “Here, let me show you how it’s done…”

  41. Pupienus said,

    January 1, 2013 at 1:26

    Keep fucking that chicken, Boehner. No, really, you’re hitting the gas, driving the GOP to irrelevance, Hey, maybe you should change the name of the party … may I suggest “Whig Party?”

  42. Gerald Fnord said,

    January 1, 2013 at 2:32

    > And the question remains: how is it that everyone knows that an influential
    > newspaper in the nation’s capital is owned and operated by an insane
    > mind-control cult based in another country, yet said paper remains influential?

    I’m paraphrasing someone, I forget who, in saying, ‘They don’t hate savage, barbaric, religious, laws…they hate competition.’

  43. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    January 1, 2013 at 2:38

    Howdy, Sadlies.

    What’s shakin’?
    .

  44. Another Kiwi said,

    January 1, 2013 at 3:19

    Bacon’s shakin’

  45. islagiatt said,

    January 1, 2013 at 4:01

    Teh infantry is obsolete. Won’t someone think of our brave drone pilots? Trapped in a sweaty room risking carpal tunnel syndrome…. Amerika’s finest.

  46. Major Kong said,

    January 1, 2013 at 4:05

    I’m sitting here waiting for my jumpseat to Memphis.

    I’ve got a bottle of wine and a TSA-approved corkscrew in my bag for when I get to the hotel.

  47. Bitter Scribe said,

    January 1, 2013 at 4:34

    I wonder what this guy actually wants us to do about Afghanistan, in the long term. Does he want us to stay beyond the 2014 withdrawal, as Charles Krauthammer does? (Or I think that’s what Krauthammer wants. He’s been silent on the subject lately, preferring to piss and moan about how arrogant and divisive it was for Obama to win re-election.)

  48. Major Kong said,

    January 1, 2013 at 4:35

    I’m not sure if Krauthammer cares who we’re blowing up just so long as we’re blowing up somebody.

  49. Bitter Scribe said,

    January 1, 2013 at 4:53

    What kills me about Afghanistan is that if you had to pick a region of the world as “most likely to replicate Vietnam,” that was it. Determined, sadistic and terroristic foe: check. Utterly corrupt and despised government on “our” side: check. Hostile terrain favorable to the enemy: check. Fragging: check.

    Plus, they don’t call that place “graveyard of empires” for nothing.

    I understand that we had to drive al-Qaeda out of there after 9/11. But after that was done, why couldn’t we have just gone home?

  50. A Bottle of Wine said,

    January 1, 2013 at 4:54

    Who knew that I could be corksrewed with the approval of the TSA?

  51. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    January 1, 2013 at 5:03

    I’ve got a bottle of wine and a TSA-approved corkscrew in my bag for when I get to the hotel.

    Holy Fuck. There’s a TSA-approved corkscrew?!
    .

  52. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    January 1, 2013 at 5:04

    Just watched Looper. NOICE.
    .

  53. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    January 1, 2013 at 6:19

    Well, okay, then.

    HOPPY NEW BEER!
    .

  54. Spearhafoc, whose nym is Old English for "sparrowhawk" said,

    January 1, 2013 at 6:26

    Just watched Looper.

    Or are you about to watch Looper? Think about it.

  55. Fenwick said,

    January 1, 2013 at 6:34

    Teh gheys can be ghey-married in Maryland in 28 minutes. Baltimore City Hall is open tonight … and the mayor is there as a witness.

    Hippie New Cheer!

  56. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 1, 2013 at 7:00

    Happy New Year, ya bastids!

  57. Smut Clyde said,

    January 1, 2013 at 7:04

    Teh gheys can be ghey-married in Maryland in 28 minutes.

    I’m sure it could be done even faster with a decent production line.

  58. Pupienus said,

    January 1, 2013 at 7:17

    We have decided that, being original eastrons and all, and the ball having dropped in THE CENTER OF THE UNIVERSE that being NY – our toast a minute or so ago IS New Year (here where we live in the past) that it’s the New Year.

    There’s a pork shoulder in the oven, started today around four of the clock. Will be ready tomorrow (THE FUTURE) afternoon. Some homemade sauerkraut will be braised(onions, caraway, white wine), potates will be mashedm (butter, butter, sour cream and butter) , beans of green will be cooked with bacon, onion and vinegar, rye bread will be made, and the NEW YEAR will be auspicious.

    Today Teh Ho wanted creamed spinach so we collaborated. The eggs shirred in creamed spinach and grilled ham was FUCKING FABULOUS.

    Happy happy, and etc. The Scotch is impauring my skilz so I’ll say see ya tomorrow!

  59. Spearhafoc, whose nym is Old English for "sparrowhawk" said,

    January 1, 2013 at 7:22

    Happy New Year!

    May 2013 suck less than it’s predecessor.

  60. N__B said,

    January 1, 2013 at 7:23

    May 2013 suck less than it’s predecessor.

    I can’t wait four months.

  61. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 1, 2013 at 7:28

    I’m working the graveyard shift- I typically work on New Year’s Eve or New Year’s Day, having come to the conclusion that it’s amateurs’ night on the boozing front- the prices are jacked up and some dumb shit is always bound to go down (the worst I saw personally was some asshole on the Lower East Side plowing onto the sidewalk in his car and crashing into a building- we hightailed it into Swift’s before the crowd that coalesced around the car got ugly, and I promptly got myself in trouble by two-timing a girl I’d just met when she went to the ladies’ room… if I’d had the wit of a Groucho Marx, I’d have told her, “I was only sucking face with that girl because she reminded me of you!” Good times, good times).

  62. John Revolta said,

    January 1, 2013 at 7:47

    Happy Sadly New Year!!

    B^4- you’re in the future! We’re in different years! (For another 15 minutes anyway.)
    What wonders can you see?

  63. Spearhafoc, whose nym is Old English for "sparrowhawk" said,

    January 1, 2013 at 7:58

    What wonders can you see?

    There’s already been a record number of fatalities caused by the jetpacks and flying cars that have been suddenly made available.

  64. John Revolta said,

    January 1, 2013 at 8:03

    OMG it sounds like WWIII outside.

  65. John Revolta said,

    January 1, 2013 at 8:10

    Wait……………….what’s that ahead?

    Oh my God……………….it’s *choke* THE FISCAL CLIFF!!11111!11!

    AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

  66. Smut Clyde said,

    January 1, 2013 at 8:15

    Pup, I think we all were surprised by the return of the ice giants

    It was IN ACCORDANCE WITH THE PROPHECY.

  67. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 1, 2013 at 8:17

    B^4- you’re in the future! We’re in different years! (For another 15 minutes anyway.)
    What wonders can you see?

    No wonders, but I did see a group of four teenagers walking by the worksite- made sure they didn’t hop the fence to take a piss on the property.

  68. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 1, 2013 at 8:29

    Whew.
    I survived.

  69. Major Kong said,

    January 1, 2013 at 8:42

    Made it to Memphis. I plan to open my bottle of Sauternes as soon as it chills.

    Why Sauternes? The bottle was small enough to fit in my suitcase.

  70. John Revolta said,

    January 1, 2013 at 8:52

    Cheers, Major.

    Mrs. R. and I will be popping our cork in about half an hour. Having some red cooking pork…………..good luck for the new year and one of Chairman Mao’s all-time faves!

    (Yeah, buncha damn Commies up in here.)

  71. Major Kong said,

    January 1, 2013 at 8:58

    I didn’t have time to make anything special today so I made a deep-dish pizza.

    I was home for all of 26 hours.

  72. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 1, 2013 at 9:05

    I’ve been on the graveyard shift for a week- fried some chicken cutlets before going to work, made sammiches. Tomorrow, I’m going over to some old friends’ house- she’s a southern girl, so she’s making ham, black-eyed peas, and collard greens. He’s Filipino, so he’s making lumpia. He’s a pisser, he always jokes that his dad makes longer lumpia, but his are thicker.

    Since I’ll be sleeping most of tomorrow, I’m bringing booze- a bottle of Glenmorangie single-malt scotch and a bottle of Pinot Grigio.

  73. Major Kong said,

    January 1, 2013 at 9:08

    We had Filipino cooks on Diego Garcia. A lumpia is kind of like a spring roll as I recall.

  74. John Revolta said,

    January 1, 2013 at 9:09

    Yeah………………………..funny thing, I spent some 30 years always being out on the road for New Year’s, shackin’ up in some hotel with some fiddle player. I don’t know if I miss it or not but at least I get to sleep in tomorrow.

  75. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 1, 2013 at 9:23

    We had Filipino cooks on Diego Garcia. A lumpia is kind of like a spring roll as I recall.

    Yup, they are delicious! Pancit is also really good. Every once in a while, I’ll even eat a balut- another friend described them as the Philippines’ answer to White Castle- the sort of thing one eats after a long night of drinking.

  76. Major Kong said,

    January 1, 2013 at 9:40

    I’ve had Pancit but balut might be a little…..advanced….for me.

  77. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 1, 2013 at 9:47

    I’ve had Pancit but balut might be a little…..advanced….for me.

    I’m one of those jerks who always likes to order something perceived as “extreme” in order to establish “cred” with the kitchen. In a Chinese restaurant, I once had the chef come out of the kitchen to see what crazy gwailo had ordered a crock-pot of braised oxtails and pigs’ knuckles.

    I didn’t have the heart to tell him that my European-born great-grandfather had a passion for pigs’ knuckles.

  78. Major Kong said,

    January 1, 2013 at 10:06

    I’m one of those jerks who always likes to order something perceived as “extreme”

    I’ve had steak tartare twice, in France. The first time it was great. The second time it made me quite ill.

  79. Babe Ruthless said,

    January 1, 2013 at 10:31

    Oooee a friend gave me a top-o-the-line vaporizer. Loaded that bad boy with Hash Truffle, and whooosh, there goes the top of my head. Best New Year’s ever!

  80. Hogeye Grex said,

    January 1, 2013 at 12:07

    Happy new year, motherfuckers.

  81. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 1, 2013 at 12:08

    Loaded that bad boy with Hash Truffle, and whooosh, there goes the top of my head.

    Hash Truffle? Izzat like space cakes?

  82. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 1, 2013 at 14:00

    Where is everybody? Drunk? Hung over?

  83. John Revolta said,

    January 1, 2013 at 15:28

    Both. Whatsitooya?

  84. Matt said,

    January 1, 2013 at 17:01

    Shorter Adm. James Lyons: “If we don’t put a stop to this Mooslem Sharona thing, it will greatly impede our ability to turn the military into an evangelical crusading force for Jeebus!”

    Seriously – way too many of the “OMG SHARIA” hand-wringers are neck-deep in the whole New Apostolic Reformation / Dominionist crap, and are spinning as hard as they can to make sure nobody notices…

  85. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    January 1, 2013 at 17:12

    Good morning, Sadlies!

    Did Santa bring you lots of goodies last night?
    .

  86. paleotectonics said,

    January 1, 2013 at 18:04

    Ugh. I’ll never mix carrot juice and radish juice again…

    Lovely New Years, groovy ghoulies!

  87. S. cerevisiae said,

    January 1, 2013 at 18:40

    Ugh. I’ll never mix carrot juice and radish juice again…

    A Looney Tunes reference always starts the year off right. I’m pretty sure I have that Bugs Bunny classic in my library.

  88. mr. mike said,

    January 1, 2013 at 18:41

    Admiral Lyons reminds me of that Monty Python sketch where the Royal Navy is looking for a lake and they are denying that there is cannibalism in the service and the BBC field man slowly turns into Long John Silver…..he starts out wrong and goes worse, somehow.

    His nickname here should be “Wrongway Peachfuzz” and he should always be depicted in a bad photoshop of his head on the cartoon character’s body.

  89. Pupienus said,

    January 1, 2013 at 19:04

    http://thomasfriedmanopedgenerator.com/Can+God+Save+Honduras%3F+749938

    Hadn’t seen it before, it’s a pretty good rendering.

  90. Pupienus said,

    January 1, 2013 at 19:06

    By “it” I mean the site. That page has today’s date so I wouldn’t have remarked on how I hadn’t seen it before. I am NOT stupid!

  91. Major Kong said,

    January 1, 2013 at 19:10

    Sitting in a hotel in Memphis – living the dream.

  92. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 1, 2013 at 19:25

    What do I want for breakfast?

  93. Major Kong said,

    January 1, 2013 at 20:24

    Put gas in my ’94 Buick airport car.
    Rear license plate fell off.
    Reattached it using bungee cords.
    Decided that was a little too “Memphis” looking.
    Fortunately Auto Zone was open today.

  94. S. cerevisiae said,

    January 1, 2013 at 20:43

    Is that Buick rusty with at least one body panel done in gray primer? If so it would be a good Rez car.

  95. Major Kong said,

    January 1, 2013 at 20:52

    Not quite that bad. It’s rusty but the paint is beige/light brown so it doesn’t really show.

    I’ve had it for 7 years so I can’t really complain about the $4500 I paid for it.

  96. Babe Ruthless said,

    January 1, 2013 at 21:00

    “Hash Truffle? Izzat like space cakes?”

    It’s the name for one of the plants they grow out here – a Hash Plant cross.
    http://www.medicalmarijuanastrains.com/hash-plant/

    So relaxing. My roommate had a woodstove disaster and set off the fire alarm at 3 am and I was not even bothered. Normally I would kill someone.

  97. Pupienus said,

    January 1, 2013 at 22:27

    I like the idea of ham, collards, blackeyed peas. Nut having grown up in a very German town in Pennyslavia I have to have pork and sauerkraut on NYD.

    Rye bread undergoing final rise. Pork shoulder has been in the oven since late yesterday afternoon. Sauerkraut with diced apple, onion, caraway, being braised in white wine (a Riesling QbA). You have to cook it looooong time. Will cook some greeny beany with bacon, onion, savory Oxford comma and a bit of vinegar. Mashed potates rounds out the plate.

  98. Pupienus said,

    January 1, 2013 at 22:28

    “Nut having grown up…”

    Now there’s a Freudian typo for you.

  99. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    January 1, 2013 at 22:32

    I’m off the cliff, and I feel fine!
    .

  100. Snorghagen said,

    January 1, 2013 at 22:46

    Wise advice from the Admiral:

    negative factors must be challenged and defeated

    Fuckin’ aye.

  101. Bitter Scribe said,

    January 1, 2013 at 22:59

    savory Oxford comma

    I’m an Eton semicolon man myself.

  102. jim the heretical anti-cliff lemming said,

    January 1, 2013 at 23:13

    Best wishes for a Happy New Year, snarkers!

    This Fiscal Cliff deal has me rethinking the whole anti-cliff thing.
    Perhaps not all precipices are created equal?

    If mandatory cliffotines are included, I will recant.

  103. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 1, 2013 at 23:13

    Put gas in my ’94 Buick airport car.
    Rear license plate fell off.
    Reattached it using bungee cords.
    Decided that was a little too “Memphis” looking.
    Fortunately Auto Zone was open today.

    You should enter that into a poetry contest, Major.

    Sauerkraut with diced apple, onion, caraway, being braised in white wine (a Riesling QbA).

    Throughout the winter, I tend to make a similar “perpetual stew”- I just keep adding different things to it over the course of a week- usually different pork products along with more cabbage, onions, maybe carrots. I call it my bigass bigos.

  104. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    January 1, 2013 at 23:25

    Oh, I’ve been to Georgia and California and anywhere I could run
    I took the hand of a preacher man and we made love in the sun
    But I ran out of places and friendly faces because I had to be free
    I’ve been to paradise but I’ve never been to me
    .

  105. Pupienus said,

    January 2, 2013 at 0:14

    If it’s any consolation, JP, I’ve never been to you either.

  106. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    January 2, 2013 at 1:07

    If it’s any consolation, JP, I’ve never been to you either.

    That is the order of thangs.
    .

  107. tsam said,

    January 2, 2013 at 1:07

    Moonie Times lets olds who wander away from the dementia ward write stuff, apparently.

  108. Pupienus said,

    January 2, 2013 at 1:11

    And just where the fuck have you been? People came round, asking questions and such, and we didnt know what to say.

  109. Bitter Scribe said,

    January 2, 2013 at 1:46

    Stanford was killing Wisconsin early but then let them back in the game. Now they lead by only 3 at the half. GAAH>

    Oh, and welcome back, tsam.

  110. Another Kiwi said,

    January 2, 2013 at 2:31

    We’ve been worried sick about tsam. I have been on my fainting couch most days.

  111. Bitter Scribe said,

    January 2, 2013 at 2:44

    I swear to God, Brent Musberger and Kirk Herbstreit are the most nerve-gratingly, teeth-grindingly annoying broadcast pair in sports.

    Of course, my nerves wouldn’t grate so easily if Stanford could make a first down in the second half.

  112. Pupienus said,

    January 2, 2013 at 2:50

    Teh Ho gave me some Citadelle gin as a Solstice gift. Having run out of our regular gin last night we’re drinking the Citadelle. I like it. The juniper is a touch heavy, muffling some of the other botanicals, but other than that it has good balance.

  113. Pupienus said,

    January 2, 2013 at 2:52

    Brent Musburger is easily the most annoying college football sportscaster EVAH.

  114. Pupienus said,

    January 2, 2013 at 2:53

    But hey, Stanford made (finally) some first downs. No points though.

  115. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 2, 2013 at 2:57

    I swear to God, Brent Musberger and Kirk Herbstreit are the most nerve-gratingly, teeth-grindingly annoying broadcast pair in sports.

    Brent Musburger is easily the most annoying college football sportscaster EVAH.

    I’ll go with Mush-booger as the worst in college football, but the worst pair all time is Joe Buck and Troy Aikman. No contest.

  116. Bitter Scribe said,

    January 2, 2013 at 3:32

    STANFORD WINS!!!!!

    It’s poetic justice because a deflection led to an interception that clinched the win. The “poetic justice” part comes because Wisconsin previously had made first downs on passes that were deflected and nevertheless caught, including one that bounced off a d-lineman’s face mask.

  117. Pupienus said,

    January 2, 2013 at 4:32

    I iz askeert. Mississipi State, with the longest bowl record victory (since 99?) lost to Northwestern who had politely conceded every bowl game they were in since Harry Truman was Preznit. Pat Buchanan said something the other day that was sane and which I agreed with. Stanford won the Rose Bowl. I fear the new year iz gunna be scaries.

  118. Fenwick said,

    January 2, 2013 at 5:08

    TSAM !!! Where have you been? What have you been doing?

  119. Pryme said,

    January 2, 2013 at 5:14

    You know what shocked me? I checked Wikipedia, and there’s no band named “The Crusades” listed.

    Also: Happy New Year, y’all.

  120. S. cerevisiae said,

    January 2, 2013 at 5:32

    Who won the Humboldt County Smoka Bowl?

  121. John Revolta said,

    January 2, 2013 at 6:10

    Huh. They passed it.

  122. Fenwick said,

    January 2, 2013 at 6:15

    Who won the Humboldt County Smoka Bowl?

    Nobody kept score. But everybody had fun!

  123. Hogeye Grex said,

    January 2, 2013 at 7:20

    They had to pass it, JR. Otherwise, when the world didn’t end, everyone would be able to see what a load of bullshit it is every time they threaten disaster to wring some more blood out of us.

    Not that anyone would notice after the media got done spinning the narrative.

  124. John Revolta said,

    January 2, 2013 at 8:10

    Plus and also, Grover apparently said it was okay.

  125. Fenwick, who detests Leprosy and has bitter, scornful laugh said,

    January 2, 2013 at 8:52

    Guerrilla Voters Cadre 18 has a confoozed about the Preznit and his promises. Let me see if I understand this correctly.

    In 2008, Obama’s promised to increase taxes on people making more than 250K, amirite? Having failed to deliver on that in four years, he trotted out the same promise in 2012. And now–less than a month after the election–he’s okay with drawing the line at $400K, izzatrite? And in return, he got to kick the same can down the road two months? (His health-care negotiating skillz are still intact.)
    ——————–
    PS. I would enjoy playing poker with the Preznit and the Democratic ‘leadership’…complete invertabrates that fold s-o-o easily, no matter what cards they are holding. Plus they’ll believe any bluff.

    PS. Anyone want bet the Preznit will go All-In on gun control … when he hasn’t gone All-In on any promise in the last four years?

    PPS. Also taking wagers on how much more of the social safety net will disappear during his presidency.
    —————-

    Happy New Year, America! Let’s get all bipartisany and look forward to more grand-bargaineering in 2013!

  126. Comrade Fenwick said,

    January 2, 2013 at 9:03

    Also liberals, progressives, and DFH’s need to put on seafarer’s slickers and oilcloth hats, because the Democrats and the White House are going to snub you and piss all over you like the last four years…only worse, now that they don’t need your votes.

  127. Major Kong said,

    January 2, 2013 at 10:38

    You’re of course correct Fenwick.

    I hate having to vote for the lesser of two evils.

    Still, I gotta go with the people who just want to piss on me instead of the ones who want to render my corpse to grease the wheel bearings of their Bentleys.

  128. Anonymous said,

    January 2, 2013 at 14:11

    Obama’s going to abolish Social Security! Any day now! Bookmark this, Obots, you will wonder how Fenwick was able to predict it so accurately!

  129. Pryme said,

    January 2, 2013 at 15:25

    I guess that means that Joe Biden and Bernie Sanders are also undercover centrist sell-outs for their participation in this thing, right?*

    But hey; we got a chunk of Republicans to actually vote against a tax cut! So up is down, black is white, dog & cats, through the looking glass.

    *The latest Great Liberal Hope, Elizabeth Warren, last went on record around 12/10 saying she wouldn’t vote on whatever the deal was at the time. Lucky for her, she doesn’t have to worry about it now and she can spend her term claiming it was the wrong thing to do.

  130. Pryme said,

    January 2, 2013 at 15:51

    I hate having to vote for the lesser of two evils.

    By definition, that’s what we always have to choose from. Even something that is blatantly “good” is still technically “less than evil.”

    People keep expecting Obama to treat the Republicans like Bush treated the Democrats; that’s not his nature (Non-liberals did not vote for this guy because they thought he was going to take a sledgehammer to the GOP).

    I expect people like Biden to keep Obama in check; sure he makes the final call, but Biden has his ear. Biden was the one who presented the deal to the Senate and I don’t see him getting involved if he was wholesale against it (I don’t even think he was really involved in this whole mess until recently). I also expect that Obama wants his base to push him but they have to do it in the Traditional Way (calling/writing the office) rather than the Comfortable Way (venting on blogs). The media’s only going to give voice to our displeasure as long as it causes a controversy; they could care less about advancing our advocacy like they did the Tea Party (hell, the FBI was both targeting and getting info on people targeting OWS and the media did jack to expose it).

    So I’m all for criticism as long as it’s constructive criticism. As in, “You’re screwing up, this is how you’re screwing up and this is how you can avoid screwing up.” And that message gets sent to the White House, your congress-critter and, if you want, your local news station/newspaper. If you’re really pissed, do it every day or every other day. I have this sneaking suspicion that liberals/progressives used the ‘net and blogs to find each other, share ideas and vent but forgot the part being active in the political process. I’ve read stuff from people over the last six years that makes me think, “Why isn’t this person fucking running for office, any office?” it makes me sad.

  131. eataTREE said,

    January 2, 2013 at 17:11

    The weeping, wailing, and gnashing of teeth from the leftward side seems uncalled for. The deal raises capital gains taxes. The deal raises the top marginal tax rates. The deal provides extended UI benefits and stimulus spending. Yes, $400,000 > $250,000, but the set of people earning more than the latter but less than the former isn’t actually all that large and isn’t going to have a large practical impact. There is a lot of anger at the GOP out there and on some level it would be most satisfying were Obama to become Conan The Barbarian, don a loincloth, crush the GOP beneath his heel, and have the Marine Marching Band play a jaunty accompaniment to the lamentations of their women. But humiliating Republicans for the sake of humiliating Republicans just isn’t something that motivates Obama at all.

  132. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

    January 2, 2013 at 17:45

    As in, “You’re screwing up, this is how you’re screwing up and this is how you can avoid screwing up.”

    Who says he’s screwing up?

    He’s done exactly what the big banks who paid for his first Presidential campaign wanted.

    The problem with the lesser evil crowd is their willful blindness towards how they’re being played. As long as the “lesser evil” can count on your votes, no matter what, it’s just going to keep getting more evil.
    ~

  133. tsam said,

    January 2, 2013 at 18:00

    And just where the fuck have you been? People came round, asking questions and such, and we didnt know what to say.

    Cookin MCs like a pound of bacon. Starting a band, humping a girl, working hard, daughter is in town…

  134. tsam said,

    January 2, 2013 at 18:03

    These “feminizing the military” guys are such vile bastards. I betcha any homo under 90 years old could break this fucker’s face.

  135. Pupienus said,

    January 2, 2013 at 18:31

    These “feminizing the military” guys are such vile bastards. I betcha any homo under 90 years old could break this fucker’s face.

    OOH, Ooh! *raising hand* I got this one pick me pick me!

  136. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 2, 2013 at 18:34

    “If the sun looks a little larger than usual today, you’re not seeing things.”
    (warning: Fox link)
    Um,…if you’re looking at the sun U R DOIN IT RONG!
    That is, seriously, the first line in that piece.
    Wagers on how many wingnuts go blind today?

  137. Pryme said,

    January 2, 2013 at 18:39

    Who says he’s screwing up?

    He’s done exactly what the big banks who paid for his first Presidential campaign wanted.

    Oh, I don’t mean those guys; I’m talking about the non-rich people who voted for him and now are (in most cases justifiably) frustrated.

  138. bbkf said,

    January 2, 2013 at 18:45

    Ugh. I’ll never mix carrot juice and radish juice again…

    ha…i will never mix vodka, whiskey and rum chata ever again…also, too…i am suffering from both a hangover and am jonesing…the son told me about ‘the IT crowd’ from teh bbc…i was instanly hooked and watched at least 18 episodes over the new year celebratory season…

  139. Fenwick said,

    January 2, 2013 at 18:48

    I was feeling all pissy and stabby. Really needed to vent.

    Major: Terrific diary. I loved the ‘Who is this Sam?’ hook.

    Did I read correctly?: You turned so hard to avoid the SA-2 that you essentially stood the gigantic BUFF on one wingtip to turn away? Also thanks for the detail about the comm chatter. “Mango.” I think other Sadlies should imagine the Beer Callsigns they would use….

    ——————-
    Oddly enough, I’ve got an SA-6 story, too, though it’s not nearly as harrowing or dramatic as yours. The unit I served in found the very first radar signatures of the first-generation SA-6 emitter, both in acquisition and tracking mode. As was typical Soviet policy, they tested new weapons in the western Military Districts of the USSR…but any actual deployment of new weapons always went to Soviet forces in East Germany, the Red Army’s most important field command. (No ambitious officer could advance to the Upper Reaches of the military heirarchy without first getting his ticket punched in GSFG. (Group of Soviet Forces Germany, an equivalent command to US Army Europe.)

    When the SA-6 was deployed in the mid-1979′s, we already had some fuzzy images of the SA-6 in development in the . And the Military Liason Missions (*) soon had excellent photos of the SA-6 Transporter/Erector/Launcher (TEL) and specialized support vehicles. The TEL was the first tracked AA platform the Red Army deployed.

    Anyway, one of our ELINT (electronic intelligence) dudes found the SA-6 emitters (radars) and it was a biggish coup for our shop. Indeed, it was the only CRITICOM [a Very Big Deal] we reported during my service. Within hours, Air Force EOM’s (among many others) probably had the SA-6 emitter signatures in both modes, or so I imagine. (We didn’t make the call on wider distribution, of course; that was made by NSA.)

    I had nothing to do with it; my best friend in the service, an ELINT (Electronic Intelligence) analyist. found it while ‘sitting pos’…no doubt using an ancient version of your EOM’s round screen with the squigglely green lines.

    The Red Army also had early versions of the SA-2 deployed around Berlin, and a ‘cordon’ of SA-2′s controlled by the five Army HQ’s. As an Order-of-Battle analyst, this WAS a problem I worked on: It was unclear whether the ‘cordon’ SA-2 units were subordinate to GSFG or to the Armies. The Brits said the Armies; most US sources held the SA-2′s as GSFG assets.

    Also worked against second-generation SCUDs (the B version). All of these weapons were primative in comparison to the sophisticated versions you faced in the Gulf War. (Actually, perhaps not: The Soviets rarely exported their top-of-line technology; Iraqi emitters and TELS may have been quite similar, for all I know.

    So that’s my SA-6 story. In some minor way, my shop may have laid the first foundations for some of the emitter images your EOM was looking at.

    ———–

    (*) Military Liason Missions (MLM) were a blast. These were guys–French, English, and US–armed with telephoto lenses driving around East Germany in souped-up Mercedes. The MLMs were a delightful remnent from WWII, and the fiction that all foar MLM operating on in the Germanies. On both sides, certain areas–known as Permanent Restricted Areas were always off-limits to MLMs.(**) For maneuvers, the Soviets set-up Temporary Restricted Areas, usually linking several PRA’S together. We had them too: Our unit and the installation was in a US PRA; during the annual Reforger exercises, we also laid down TRA’s.

    (**) They could try to get into a Restricted Area, until discovered and escorted out. One of my favorite MLM reports introduced a series of photos like thist: “Fortunately, the Mission took a wrong turn and ended up in the Jena-Weimar PRA, securing photos of a mech convoy and Installations 261, 262, and 418 before being escorted out.”

    Too much information? Well it’s better than Fenwick squalling over the Preznit and the Democrats, amirite?

  140. Thread Bear said,

    January 2, 2013 at 18:51

    Yes, $400,000 > $250,000, but the set of people earning more than the latter but less than the former isn’t actually all that large and isn’t going to have a large practical impact.

    But the number of people making more than the former is a significant number and they all get the tax break on that extra $150,000.

  141. Fenwick said,

    January 2, 2013 at 18:52

    mid-1970′s. Liaison. Other speling mistakes? I blame the messicans.

  142. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 2, 2013 at 18:53

    Egad.
    It’s a verbatim republication of the Space.com story.
    OK, scratch them off the list too.
    Finding stupid is becoming too easy.
    I mean, I’ve already thrown the mirrors away…

  143. Pryme said,

    January 2, 2013 at 19:35

    Time to play another round of: Who Said This: Liberal or Conservative?

    But really, this 15 minute moment in time shows us what’s wrong with [political party]. The other side fights tooth and nail to win and they never, ever, ever stop. Our side gives up before the fight has begun and the only question they ask is, “How much territory shall we cede?”

    The answer may surprise you.

  144. Major Kong said,

    January 2, 2013 at 19:38

    Did I read correctly?: You turned so hard to avoid the SA-2 that you essentially stood the gigantic BUFF on one wingtip to turn away?

    Yes, you are correct. We could actually turn pretty well at 40,000 feet with that much wing.

    Used to give the F-4 drivers fits in training exercises. They’d try to make a gun pass on us and we’d roll up 90 degrees right at them.

  145. bbkf said,

    January 2, 2013 at 19:41

    votemout2012 • an hour ago
    I want know know the names of the cowards who voted for this garbage!
    1 •Share ›
    oldmom2 votemout2012 • 41 minutes ago
    I’m shocked…one is Paul Ryan!

    i must put this on a tee shirt…

  146. bbkf said,

    January 2, 2013 at 19:42

    Used to give the F-4 drivers fits in training exercises. They’d try to make a gun pass on us and we’d roll up 90 degrees right at them.

    this makes me feel less sorry for my high school driver’s ed teacher…

  147. bbkf said,

    January 2, 2013 at 20:04

    relevant to last few remarks…

  148. Major Kong said,

    January 2, 2013 at 20:36

    Oh dear.

  149. bbkf said,

    January 2, 2013 at 22:12

    i guess i should have made ‘thread killing’ as my new year’s resolution…

  150. Major Kong said,

    January 2, 2013 at 22:14

    i guess i should have made ‘thread killing’ as my new year’s resolution…

    ’tis but a flesh wound!

  151. Bitter Scribe said,

    January 2, 2013 at 22:37

    As long as this thread is sputtering all over the place, can we wish a brain-based blood clot on Instafuckhead?

  152. Major Kong said,

    January 2, 2013 at 22:43

    Doesn’t there have to be an actual brain there? Wouldn’t the clot just be rattling around inside his skull looking for one?

  153. bbkf said,

    January 2, 2013 at 23:12

    In reading Althouse, keep in mind that she married a commenter on her own blog.

    IS THIS TRUE?!?!?!

  154. bbkf said,

    January 2, 2013 at 23:19

    As long as this thread is sputtering all over the place, can we wish a brain-based blood clot on Instafuckhead?

    along with watching the entire canon of ‘the i.t. crowd’, i have watched a shit tonne of ‘grey’s anatomy’ (i have heretofor never watched the show–i know, LAME–but now i am being even LAMER by watching it on netflix) and i have to admit that i am surprised that a somewhat good looking mopey brain surgeon did not immediately operate on hillary…i’m sure whatever hospital she was in in d.c. was fine and all, but it’s apparently no seattle grace…

  155. Another Kiwi said,

    January 2, 2013 at 23:21

    IS THIS TRUE?!?!?! Indeed it is.

  156. Bitter Scribe said,

    January 2, 2013 at 23:25

    Doesn’t there have to be an actual brain there? Wouldn’t the clot just be rattling around inside his skull looking for one?

    This reminds me, for no particular reason, of the Stanford Band when Nixon developed a blood clot in his leg after leaving office. The fear (or hope, depending on your views) was that the clot would find its way to his heart and kill him. The Band spelled out “CLOT” on the field and played “Show Me the Way.”

    God knows what the Band had to promise to get ESPN to show them at halftime at the Rose Bowl. Probably hostages to ensure good behavior.

  157. Another Kiwi said,

    January 2, 2013 at 23:27

    bbkf if your stomach is up to it here’s the whole story.
    I’ll be at the waste disposal unit.

  158. bbkf said,

    January 2, 2013 at 23:42

    bbkf if your stomach is up to it here’s the whole story.
    I’ll be at the waste disposal unit.

    gah! at first i found it to be hilarious…that soon turned to grody…

  159. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 2, 2013 at 23:51

    Heh, those RedState mangoes were delicious- I am looking forward to the great GOP primary fights leading up to 2014. Anybody out there in a “Red” area who’d be willing to run as a Tea Party spoiler, for some Super Alinsky Funtime Kicks? Not to mention some sweet grifting cash-o-la!

  160. Major Kong said,

    January 3, 2013 at 1:25

    New diary is up:

    http://www.dailykos.com/story/2013/01/02/1175714/-Gulf-War-Diaries-Hammer-Time

  161. Whale Chowder said,

    January 3, 2013 at 1:49

    Major, you’re in danger of becoming loquacious.

    Thanks for the ongoing writing. It’s fascinating.

  162. Major Kong said,

    January 3, 2013 at 2:25

    Major, you’re in danger of becoming loquacious.

    There’s only so much to do on a 17-hour layover in Dayton, in January.

  163. Pupienus said,

    January 3, 2013 at 2:37

    Oh fuck, Dakron OH for 17 hours?! You have my sympathies, major.

  164. Major Kong said,

    January 3, 2013 at 2:54

    It’s the typical “hotel hostage situation” out by the interstate.

    There’s plenty of places to eat but they’re all chain restaurants that I wouldn’t normally go near if I had my choice.

  165. Bitter Scribe said,

    January 3, 2013 at 3:41

    Just read the war diaries, Major. Amazing stuff.

  166. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    January 3, 2013 at 3:48

    Anybody out there in a “Red” area who’d be willing to run as a Tea Party spoiler, for some Super Alinsky Funtime Kicks? Not to mention some sweet grifting cash-o-la!

    Hey, maybe I should move to La Vergne! Get closer to the job, less wear on the scooter, and… run for Congress against Dr. Scott “Many ‘Bortions” DesJarlais! What’s not to love about that scenario!
    .

  167. jim the heretical anti-cliff lemming said,

    January 3, 2013 at 3:48

    Whoa … logged into a different DE & was immediately greeted with “Happy New Year 2013! :-)

    Uhh, gee, thanks, computer … you too?

    Don’t look now but I have a funny feeling that KyNet-Say is ecoming-bay elf-aware-say.

    those RedState mangoes were delicious

    Caveat the First: butthurt = conservatives’ oxygen. If they’re not outraged, check for a pulse.
    Caveat the Second: remember that most of these folks are too dim to actually realize when they’ve won much of the time … & too memory-deficient to recall what they originally wanted eleven goalpost-jumps ago.

  168. S. cerevisiae said,

    January 3, 2013 at 5:16

    OK, godamn I have only flown commercial but the thought of a fucking missile on my ass makes me shake from here. When you think about it we have been developing killer robots for 100 or so years. More? DaVinci?

  169. Gary Ruppert said,

    January 3, 2013 at 5:43

    The fact is, liberals, yes we are. For freedom, well you are not.

    http://www.plunderbund.com/2013/01/02/new-conservative-website-just-dont-call-it-coxs-army/

  170. Gary Ruppert said,

    January 3, 2013 at 5:45

    The fact is, we are so tired of the liberal eleitists shoving gays and gun grabbers down are throats. We prefer the Freedom Agenda and cut taxes.

  171. jim the heretical anti-cliff lemming said,

    January 3, 2013 at 7:40

    “29y.o. Taxes, buff, 6’2″, seven inches CUT, seeking real conservative for some no-strings fun at the Centerville Airport restroom, second stall from the right. No tops, no games, no RINOs, NO FATTIES.”

  172. Pupienus said,

    January 3, 2013 at 7:48

    jim seems to be intimately familiar with the personals lingo, especially wrt the M4M tropes. Makes one wonder, it does.

  173. Fenwick said,

    January 3, 2013 at 8:55

    I have only flown commercial but the thought of a fucking missile on my ass makes me shake from here.

    I can chip in with another tangential SAM story.

    In the Cold War there were only three air corridors into Berlin. (These were the routes flown during the Berlin Airlift, btw.) Soviet SAMs routinely used Western commercial flights as notional targets for training.

    The SAM units went through the complete drill, radar aquisition and tracking, voice comms, missle prep, launcher adjustment, the grande enchilada. The only part that was NOT real was the simulated launch and the simulated destruct. Anyway, that’s what popped into my head when I read S.Cerev’s comment: Unbeknownst to passengers on commercial flights, there WAS a fucking missle aimed at their ass….

  174. bughunter said,

    January 3, 2013 at 8:59

    So now we have two real life GOP assholes on the record telling someone to commit an anatomically impossible act, and one imaginary Democrat.

  175. bughunter said,

    January 3, 2013 at 9:06

    Oh, and I can accurately report that the daily high in San Jose de Cabo has been a monotonous 78 degrees for the past 10 days, with predictable sunny to partly sunny conditions and deluges of rum- and tequila-based beverages beginning at midday and lasting until I forget…

    But it’s good to be back. Watching lovely ladies lounge languidly poolside gets boring after…

    OK, it never gets boring.

  176. Major Kong said,

    January 3, 2013 at 10:47

    I can accurately report that the daily high in San Jose de Cabo has been a monotonous 78 degrees for the past 10 days

    I’ll keep that in mind when I’m de-icing in Dayton tonight.

  177. Substance McGravitas said,

    January 3, 2013 at 14:27

    Snow again last night in Toronto.

  178. Major Kong said,

    January 3, 2013 at 14:36

    Snow again last night in Toronto.

    And out in the middle of Lake Ontario
    The same snow is falling
    On the deep silent water
    The great dark wonder
    Into the waves of my heart

  179. N__B said,

    January 3, 2013 at 15:38

    De-icing the Dayton.

  180. Helmut Monotreme said,

    January 3, 2013 at 16:39

    It was twelve degrees here in Madison yesterday when I went out for a three mile run …that turned into a two mile run and one mile walk after I cramped up.

  181. bughunter said,

    January 3, 2013 at 16:55

    <a href="http://raniakhalek.com/2013/01/02/us-media-portrays-rape-culture-as-a-foreign-problem-heres-why-theyre-wrong/#more-1861"Rania Khalek on rape culture double standards in the US: Critical without being shrill.

    I’ve been a fan of Ms. Kalek’s blog for a while, waiting for her to break into the mainstream. She writes very, very well.

  182. bughunter said,

    January 3, 2013 at 16:57

    FYWP.

    With an octothorpe.

    (Follow the second link… you’ll get there.)

  183. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

    January 3, 2013 at 18:56

    The orbs are coming for you, S_McG.
    ~

  184. Thread Bear said,

    January 3, 2013 at 19:45

    De-icing the Dayton.

    A nice dinner, a couple drinks and maybe a movie will sometimes de-ice your date.

  185. Major Kong said,

    January 3, 2013 at 20:04

    A nice dinner, a couple drinks and maybe a movie will sometimes de-ice your date.

    The airplane is rather kinky and into “water sports”. It prefers being sprayed all over with a heated mixture of propylene glycol.

  186. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    January 3, 2013 at 20:07

    Snow again last night in Toronto.

    Relevant.

  187. eataTREE said,

    January 3, 2013 at 20:30

    Growing up, I thought the de-icing process was required for the airplane to fly. (Also, I was a teenager when I learned that a block heater is an optional piece of equipment on a car.)

  188. bbkf said,

    January 3, 2013 at 20:46

    holy cats, my sister went on line and got us aero tickets so we may go see our mother over easter (and mine and hubbkf’s 28th anniversary)…when the flip are they going to stop coming up with new things to charge you for? why are they making commercial flights so flipping difficult to book? holytittyflippers!

  189. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 3, 2013 at 20:54

    The Lake Effect Machine, she is revving up.

  190. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 3, 2013 at 20:55

    Flipping the Titties.

  191. Helmut Monotreme said,

    January 3, 2013 at 21:05

    That’s not really a euphamism.

  192. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 3, 2013 at 21:26

    Figures.
    Take two,…[clack]

  193. bbkf said,

    January 3, 2013 at 21:35

    wowser…got sucked into the comments from the old admiral’s piece…many, many mangoes…pretty much all old hash–lefties ‘hate, loathe and despise’ ‘murka, as does bronco, apology tours, bowing to foreigners, he’s not really commander in chief, we’re all too ‘p.c.’…it’s kind of endearing how they hold on to their tropes…

  194. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 3, 2013 at 21:42

    Titting the Flippies.

    “CUT!”

    Fuck this fucking script.

  195. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    January 3, 2013 at 21:45

    PENIS.

  196. Major Kong said,

    January 3, 2013 at 22:06

    why are they making commercial flights so flipping difficult to book?

    If my destination is less than six hours by car I won’t even think about flying commercial.

    I’ve had the opportunity to fly on some of the European carriers (KLM, Air France, Lufthansa) and the experience was much more pleasant.

  197. bbkf said,

    January 3, 2013 at 22:13

    If my destination is less than six hours by car I won’t even think about flying commercial.

    oh, most undoubtedly…hubbkf and i always prefer the driving over the flying if at all possible…i tried talking the sister into driving out to mesa, but her husband thought we would get lost or something (really, what’s so hard about finding arizona? i take a right, and go in a straight line from there, duh!) if imma travel, i want to actually SEE stuff…but anyhoo…

    i haven’t flown any euro carriers, but both times i’ve flown overseas (delta–WORST AIRLINE EVER!!!) i heard from the foreigners in the group how awesome their flights were…

  198. bbkf said,

    January 3, 2013 at 22:14

    PENIS.

    also, too…i have never spent so much time reading penis related comments before…so, thanks for that…?

  199. Thread Bear said,

    January 3, 2013 at 22:31

    I have a new eaglet neighbor. The second egg is cracking, should be a new eaglet soon.

  200. bughunter said,

    January 3, 2013 at 22:58

    Jeebus save us. To think that these are just a sample of the loonies running our country, and that there are more just like them still in office, scares the shit out of me.

    We’re so fucked.

  201. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 3, 2013 at 23:37

    I have a new eaglet neighbor.

    Way cool!
    Bookmarked, thanks.
    I checked in mid-feeding. Amazing how delicate they can be with that big honkin’ beak.
    I always feel better when they show back up in the spring.
    Last year was a good one. An adult pair, one 2nd/3rd year sub-adult, and two juveniles. The pair are nesting somewhere close, and come to the lake to feed. I’ve been hoping one of the juveniles decides to pair up and stick around. We got plenty good nesting trees, and since the real estate crash it’s been relatively quiet.

  202. Major Kong said,

    January 3, 2013 at 23:40

    Just got back from working out.

    I rather enjoy the treadmill. I find it a perfect metaphor for my career.

  203. Chris said,

    January 3, 2013 at 23:53

    More 1%er nonsense from France, for those who’re interested.

    It really personifies the mindset like nothing I’ve ever seen. He’s leaving France because of an oppressive tax rate… okay. Where’s he going? Belgium, as originally rumored? America? Switzerland? Nope – Russia. A mobocracy run by ex-KGB thugs, one of the most corrupt and authoritarian countries in Europe, but, according to him, “a great democracy,” because its leaders lick his boots instead of the one time the French leader called him a name.

  204. Major Kong said,

    January 4, 2013 at 0:07

    He’s leaving France because of an oppressive tax rate

    I always liked Jean Reno better anyway.

  205. Helmut Monotreme said,

    January 4, 2013 at 0:12

    I like the fact that the former soviet union is now Galt’s Gulch. Can we convince American libertarians to follow suit?

  206. daphne said,

    January 4, 2013 at 0:20

    Experts often suggest that crime resembles an epidemic. But what kind? Karl Smith, a professor of public economics and government at the University of North Carolina-Chapel Hill, has a good rule of thumb for categorizing epidemics: If it spreads along lines of communication, he says, the cause is information. Think Bieber Fever. If it travels along major transportation routes, the cause is microbial. Think influenza. If it spreads out like a fan, the cause is an insect. Think malaria. But if it’s everywhere, all at once—as both the rise of crime in the ’60s and ’70s and the fall of crime in the ’90s seemed to be—the cause is a molecule.

    A molecule? That sounds crazy. What molecule could be responsible for a steep and sudden decline in violent crime?
    Source: Mother Jones
    http://www.motherjones.com/environment/2013/01/lead-crime-link-gasoline

  207. bbkf said,

    January 4, 2013 at 0:29

    He’s leaving France because of an oppressive tax rate

    if i lived in france i would not be weeping over this…

  208. Chris said,

    January 4, 2013 at 0:30

    I always liked Jean Reno better anyway.

    Me too. (Though honestly I had no idea what any of their politics were before this mess broke).

    I like the fact that the former soviet union is now Galt’s Gulch. Can we convince American libertarians to follow suit?

    Our 1%ers seem much more enamored with China. Go figure.

  209. bughunter said,

    January 4, 2013 at 0:48

    What molecule could be responsible for a steep and sudden decline in violent crime?

    Umm… delta-9 Tetrahydrocannabinol?

  210. Fenwick said,

    January 4, 2013 at 1:34

    Yes.

  211. Pupienus said,

    January 4, 2013 at 2:00

    Influenza isn’t microbial, it is due to a virus. Malaria is only spread by insects, the cause is a microbe.

    /nitpicking

  212. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    January 4, 2013 at 2:03

    Happy belated new year. I go on holiday for a while and a bunch of new threads break out and HTML Mencken shows up!

    Evidently for everyone’s benefit I should disappear more often.

  213. John Revolta said,

    January 4, 2013 at 2:24

    Okay, sheesh.

    causevector, then.

    Very interesting article though. I’m the first one to yell that correlation=/= causation but this is pretty good correlation.

  214. bughunter said,

    January 4, 2013 at 2:46

    Joke of the week: Enumclaw.com’s 2012 Most Trustworthy News Sources:

    1. Drudge
    2. Wingnut Daily
    3. The Blahs
    4. Blartblart Nooze
    5. Faux Nooze

    … and more!

  215. Smut Clyde said,

    January 4, 2013 at 2:55

    A molecule? That sounds crazy. What molecule could be responsible for a steep and sudden decline in violent crime?

    What’s the libertarian position on lead-based paint and petrol additives? Would they reverse the ban and allow the Free Market to find the most profitable level of childhood brain damage?

  216. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 4, 2013 at 3:11

    Shit- major “reorganization” at work. I’m okay, but my former supervisor, my former manager, and the friend who got my foot in the door in the first place all got canned.

    We were called into a meeting with one day’s notice, and I find myself working a full shift while prepared for a one-hour meeting… I can’t wait until I get to the bottle of cognac sitting at home- I sure as hell need a drink right now.

  217. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    January 4, 2013 at 3:16

    We were called into a meeting with one day’s notice, and I find myself working a full shift while prepared for a one-hour meeting…

    Look, kid… we’re gonna stick this knife in the table, and leave you and Sanders in here for a while. When one of you comes out, 10-cent raise and a spiffy new title!
    .

  218. John Revolta said,

    January 4, 2013 at 3:19

    Yikes. Hang in there, buddy.

  219. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 4, 2013 at 3:19

    What’s the libertarian position on lead-based paint and petrol additives? Would they reverse the ban and allow the Free Market to find the most profitable level of childhood brain damage?

    That’s the funniest thing about libertarians (so called)- they don’t give a damn when a gay couple is denied a marriage permit, but they pitch a fit when the government wants to regulate factory emissions. I don’t own a smokestack, I don’t know anyone who does. It’s like they don’t care about personal liberty at all, they only care about corporations being free from even the most cursory oversight, but that can’t be right, “liberty” is right in their name… amiright?

  220. Fenwick said,

    January 4, 2013 at 3:37

    Major: My beer callsign would be Magic Hat 9. (Pretend it’s for a Weasel…)

    Also, I’ve been thinking about breaking down and signing-up to comment at the Great Orange Satan.

    I’ve got a longish story from the ’90s that tangentially features a Weasel and multiple aeriel re-fuelings (with the tankers coming from Diego Garcia!). As a civilian consultant, I created the ‘backstory’ for a Command-Post Exercise (CPX) for the Joint Special Operations Command (JSOC), portraying a hypothetical joint-service sabotage mission against Kharg Island in the Gulf. The ‘backstory’ portion of the CPX was UNclassified; I can write about it with no constraints.

    I feel reluctant to clutter up Sadlyburg with obscure Fenwick Stories from my past, especially military stuff. I never know how they are recieved; people seldom comment on them, positively or negatively.

    However, I’m fairly certain you would enjoy the fictional Clean Slate operation. It starts with a SECDEF order….

  221. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 4, 2013 at 3:48

    Look, kid… we’re gonna stick this knife in the table, and leave you and Sanders in here for a while. When one of you comes out, 10-cent raise and a spiffy new title!

    That’s the way it seems right now- I was promoted to supervisor about six months ago, and things went smoothly, as if nothing had changed, for the entire time- I was just the guy typing out the monthly schedule into a spreadsheet (former supervisor was pretty computer iliterate). Yesterday, I get a call from the department head saying that we were to have a meeting today (we figured it would be the annual “ten cent raise” meeting), now WHAM! everything’s all shook up.

    Needless to say, morale is pretty damn bad. My former supervisor called me to thank me for all the help I’d given him over the years, and he sounded sad, just sad.

    Of course, it’s the little things that hit you- now I have to retype an entirely new schedule for the month (juggling the remaining staff). Procrastinating here is helping, people.

  222. Fenwick said,

    January 4, 2013 at 3:59

    BBBB: At least they must value your work if you survived the massacre, amirite? ((Fenwick tries to buck up yer spirits.))

    The WAY in which the massacre was done seems arctic-ly cold-hearted. One day’s notice? Is there any sort of severence (small consolation for the shock)? I hope the guy who helped you lands on his feet.

    Also, after a massacre, the survivors often face the ‘we-need-to-do-more-with-less’ bullshit, dumping an even heavier workload them. Any idea yet how this will impact you at work?

    Hang in there, old chum.

  223. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 4, 2013 at 4:01

    I feel reluctant to clutter up Sadlyburg with obscure Fenwick Stories from my past, especially military stuff. I never know how they are recieved; people seldom comment on them, positively or negatively.

    As I’ve mentioned before, you should set up a blog- you are a writer by inclination, and you’ve lived a long, eventful life. There’s always a spot on my blogroll for you, old chum.

    As another bald guy is wont to say, “Make it so!”

  224. Major Kong said,

    January 4, 2013 at 4:06

    Fenwick – you should definitely write your stories. There are a lot of great stories from that era and they deserve to be told.

  225. Major Kong said,

    January 4, 2013 at 4:08

    BBBB: That sucks. Both the situation and the way they went about it.

  226. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    January 4, 2013 at 4:08

    Jeez B^4 what a way to start the year. I hope at least it does nothing but improve from here.

  227. kg said,

    January 4, 2013 at 4:27

    OBS, I’m glad to report that I will be brewing my first batch this Saturday. I’ve got all the equipment I need and an extract kit. I’ll report back my results in several weeks. btw, I’ve read the Papazian book, great rec. Think I may buy Palmer’s book next.

  228. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 4, 2013 at 4:29

    Catching up with the thread:

    I have a new eaglet neighbor. The second egg is cracking, should be a new eaglet soon.

    That’s awesome! The Hudson River is starting to develop ice floes, which means that the eagles will be flying down to find open water in my neck of the woods. I always do at least one eagle-watching expedition every winter.

    BBBB: That sucks. Both the situation and the way they went about it. & Jeez B^4 what a way to start the year. I hope at least it does nothing but improve from here.

    Yeah, I left a message with another canned co-worker I’m pretty close with- I’ll find out what the severance package was like. I may be getting it in ten or so years.

  229. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    January 4, 2013 at 4:47

    Good to hear kg! I’m sure you’ll have fun. Good luck!

  230. kg said,

    January 4, 2013 at 4:50

    BBBB, too soon?

  231. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    January 4, 2013 at 4:53

    Sad to hear about the rightsizing BBBB. My impression was that your work crew was pretty decent folk. I can recall you describing long grueling circadian breaking monster shifts but I don’t ever remember you griping about cow-orkers. That’s pretty special.

    But things often have a way of working out. True story, Ultra Ninja’s mom got laid off the day she got pregnant. While that sounds pretty bad, it turned out great for us. The severance was generous enough that we could put off worrying about finances for the duration of the pregnancy. Plus she ended up double dipping by going back to fill in on spot contracts where her hours were entirely at her discretion and she could self-schedule around things like the week 5 exhaustion. And stop completely at month 8. And now she’s back to full time with another company that she actually likes much better. Only downside is her commute is longer.

  232. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    January 4, 2013 at 4:54

    Plus she still keeps in touch with all the folks at the old job that she liked. And not so much with the folks she didn’t.

  233. N__B said,

    January 4, 2013 at 5:02

    Look, kid… we’re gonna stick this knife in the table, and leave you and Sanders in here for a while. When one of you comes out, 10-cent raise and a spiffy new title!

    You got a knife? Last time that happened to me, all that was on the table was a pair of chattering teeth.

  234. Bitter Scribe said,

    January 4, 2013 at 5:25

    BBBB – Glad you survived. Not saying anything against your friends who got canned, but sometimes being a really hard worker can insulate you in these situations, and I’m guessing that’s you. (Distributing work among the survivors—that sounds like a real day at the beach.)

    My company is circling the drain. Our CEO, aka the Crazy Cat Lady, is stiffing vendors left and right. We had to change printers on three days’ notice, essentially because the old printer wouldn’t carry us anymore. I’m guessing she’s at the end of her line of credit and there ain’t no more where that came from.

  235. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 4, 2013 at 5:25

    BBBB, too soon?

    Never too soon to snark.

    Sad to hear about the rightsizing BBBB. My impression was that your work crew was pretty decent folk. I can recall you describing long grueling circadian breaking monster shifts but I don’t ever remember you griping about cow-orkers. That’s pretty special.

    It was a largely likable bunch that got canned. One guy is eligible for Social Security at his age, but wanted to wait for a bit before retiring- when I relieved him on Sunday, he told me he didn’t forsee finishing the new year. A lot of them, sadly, are people approaching, but not at, retirement age. Some people have been put on a part-time schedule, some furloughed. My department is year-round essential (we’re the 24/7/365 crew). The thing that gets me is that I work for a not-for-profit which has taken a decidedly “corporatist” turn.

  236. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 4, 2013 at 5:26

    You got a knife? Last time that happened to me, all that was on the table was a pair of chattering teeth.

    It was a cardboard cut-out of a knife- gotta cut the knife budget, after all.

  237. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    January 4, 2013 at 5:35

    BBBB – Glad you survived. Not saying anything against your friends who got canned, but sometimes being a really hard worker can insulate you in these situations, and I’m guessing that’s you. (Distributing work among the survivors—that sounds like a real day at the beach.)

    I survived because I haven’t been around too long, accumulating yearly raises, and I am more tech savvy than most of the guys who were laid off. My standard line about the job is that it’s a cushy job, except when it’s not. About 75% of my time, I can surf the web, walk around the grounds, and generally enjoy myself, 20% of the time I have to deal with people (something I don’t mind doing), and about 5% of the time I’m getting my ass handed to me during “weather events” or physical plant malfunctions. Those times I’m standing in dirty water up to my calves frantically restarting a stalled pump during a hurricane are few and far between, but they have occurred.

  238. Bitter Scribe said,

    January 4, 2013 at 5:43

    I survived because I haven’t been around too long, accumulating yearly raises…

    Yeah, I remember those. Now the annual raise is “be grateful you still have a job.”

    I’m interviewing for a job at my old magazine that would certainly mean a pay cut. If they make me an offer, I’ll have to decide how much money I’m willing to give up for (relative) job security.

  239. kg said,

    January 4, 2013 at 5:44

    We’ve got these “Performance Improvement Plans” that serve as cover for pushing out older employees (who’ve accumulated vacation time, salary, etc). Basically they pick on 50-somethings who are expected to work 50+hrs/week in the lab and say “hey, why aren’t you publishing or presenting at symposiums, etc” and ding them on their performance reviews. Enough dings and you’re out.
    Management seems to think that they can replace these highly seasoned professionals with recent college grads. You can guess how that works out.

  240. Fenwick said,

    January 4, 2013 at 5:46

    Thanks to all for your encouragement. I’ll work on the Clean Slate piece and publish it here in Sadlyville. (I like the people here and feel comfortable.)

    I’ve got some material in draft, but I doubt it will be ready for this thread.

  241. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 4, 2013 at 5:54

    A lot of them, sadly, are people approaching, but not at, retirement age.

    Standard Operating Procedure.
    That shit pisses me off royal, and makes me damn glad I made it to the end and got out before the door hit me in the ass.
    My son is in a similar position as you, and they’ve now offered him a managerial spot. It was all I could do to not scream “NOOOOO!”, but I did remind him of the concept of being promoted out the door. I’m truly frightened for all the kids out there who don’t really have a choice but to hang on for dear life.
    This shit is just wrong – wrong – wrong.

  242. Another Kiwi said,

    January 4, 2013 at 6:06

    Sorry to hear of your workplace shite BBBB. It has always sounded like a good place to work.

  243. Pupienus said,

    January 4, 2013 at 6:11

    Management seems to think that they can replace these highly seasoned professionals with recent college grads. You can guess how that works out..

    Management NEVER understands how important institutional knowledge in the technical areas is, nor how easily it is lost. Sure, get rid of your knowledge base, then start watching all your product development metrics go to shit. it takes a while for full effect to be felt but its pretty much guaranteed to make you uncompetetive in the long run.

  244. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 4, 2013 at 6:31

    Bah.
    The only people who care about long term survival are the low level employees. Running shit into the ground is working just fine for the “Job Creators”.

  245. Fenwick said,

    January 4, 2013 at 6:44

    Scribe: My sieve-like memory tells me you are a Chicagoan. (Correct me if wrong.) I’ve been a vaguely analogous position: My first job as a consultant was for an 8A (minority/woman-owned) firm, about to reach the limit of the its preferred status. No one was confident about the feature, and people were scrambling to bail. It may not have have been in full-blown Crazy Cat Lady land…but it was mos def in Writing On the Wall territory.

    Moreover, I was an expendable newbie. I had only been with company for 18 months or so. The first year, i worked in the basement of the Department of Energy as a worker-bee technical writer. The project was over; the DOE contract had ended. Thereafter I worked as a ‘duty bod’ at the company’s HQ, doing low-level work on training-development contracts and working for proposal writers.

    Happy outcome: I was scut-working for a (wonderful) project director, who confided that she was slipping out early for a job interview. Spur of the moment, I asked if she would take my resume alongr. She did, bless her heart She was hired; soon thereafter I was interviewed and hired. We were colleagues for the next twelve years.

    Mainly, I sympathize with your tenuous situation, Scribe, and hope that it resolves itself into a happy outcome.

  246. Fenwick said,

    January 4, 2013 at 6:46

    This shit is just wrong – wrong – wrong.

    This.

  247. Fenwick said,

    January 4, 2013 at 6:54

    Maybe my memory is all scrambled about peeple’s locations. Mr Mayor, you are a Chicago person, are you not? Also you’ve got your bestest Righteous Rant on tonight!

  248. Bitter Scribe said,

    January 4, 2013 at 6:54

    Fenwick–I’m a kinda-sorta Chicagoan–live in the exurbs and don’t hit the city more than a few times a year. Thanks for the good wishes. One of my resolutions is to seriously network and look hard. I’m like those “people approaching, but not at, retirement age” that got screwed at BBBB’s place.

    My immediate supervisor, paradoxically, is well past retirement age. The word on him (we’re not close enough for me to ask) was that he was ready to retire but got pounded by the Great Recession. Now he’s pretty tired and not up to the task of trying to talk sense to the wall, aka the Crazy Cat Lady, aka our CEO.

  249. bbkf said,

    January 4, 2013 at 7:10

    meh…i am at a point where i dislike both my jobs…feel grateful that i am down to two that i dislike, but feel like a tremendous asshole even admitting that i am job-unhappy at a time when lots of people would like to have just one job…

    i needs to find myself some freelance writing gigs…any thoughts, sadlies?

  250. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 4, 2013 at 8:33

    Fenwick said,
    January 4, 2013 at 6:54

    No, Sir.
    My family is from the Upper Peninsula of Michigan.
    My parents moved to Flint for work in the auto factories after WWII.
    I did my 30 years in “The Shop” also, and then ran like hell back “Up Home”.

    I’ve only been to Chicago once, but it was a few hours I will never forget as long as I live, though. Indefinite layoff in the eighties, and took a gig as a roadie. I had to meet the tour in Kansas City, so I took a Greyhound. Turned out I had a three hour layover in The Windy City. Was not quite midnight. I was bored, so I stepped outside, around the corner into a dark alley, and fired up a fat one. Soon, an older black gentleman stuck his head around the corner, sniffing the air. He spied me, and gave me the universal expression that said “May I?” What the hell. I hadn’t had a decent conversation the whole day, so we commenced huffin’ that bad boy down. He asks me how much time I had, and do I like the blues. I did, and do. Turns out he’s a cab driver, so I throw caution to the wind, and let him cart me around. Five minutes later, we’re in some tiny little hole in the wall blues club. I have no recollection of the name, nor where it might be. He bought all the drinks, and I enjoyed two hours of the most amazing blues I have ever heard. Ten minutes before I need to catch the bus, *he* points at his watch, we hurry to the cab, and he dropped me off just in time for me to board.
    The herb be’s sociable, y’know?

  251. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    January 4, 2013 at 8:52

    …and to The Major,
    The blogs are outstanding.
    Also, and too, I have been ordering beaucoup crap from Amazon, and every time something shows up, I imagine the chickens staring at it for hours.
    Thanks.

  252. John Revolta said,

    January 4, 2013 at 9:03

    Mayor: good story. I drove a cab in Chicago late ’70s and had all kindsa similar adventures. Also, around the same time, friends of mine had a cabin way out in the woods near Iron River so I got to know and love the UP. Small world.

  253. Major Kong said,

    January 4, 2013 at 9:11

    Thanks Mayor

  254. a chicken said,

    January 4, 2013 at 9:23

    Brrck brrkkow?

  255. John Revolta said,

    January 4, 2013 at 9:29

    Major, Mayor. Mayor, Major.

  256. Another Kiwi said,

    January 4, 2013 at 9:58

    The Sadlies are never less than interesting.

  257. Another chicken said,

    January 4, 2013 at 11:20

    bruck brrrcck BRKKRRrrCK!

  258. A Siren said,

    January 4, 2013 at 12:44

    You sure?

  259. N__B said,

    January 4, 2013 at 12:49

    Overseas nymfail FTW!

  260. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    January 4, 2013 at 16:10

    re: Debt Ceiling

    Please remember what the upcoming fight is about – that the US Gov’t must limit the amount of debt it has, lest lenders lose confidence in the full faith and credit etc. etc. IOW, you can’t borrow too much or else people won’t lend to you anymore.

    How does one measure the willingness of people to lend money to the US Government? Treasury Bill rates – that is the amount of interest the US Government must pay on newly issued debt. What are those rates right now? Essentially zero since Treasury has no way of accepting negative interest rate bids, but on the secondary bond market, they are negative. Not negative yield relative to inflation – just plain negative. The market is telling Uncle Sam that it wants to give it $1,000 today in exchange for $998.50 two weeks from now.

  261. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    January 4, 2013 at 16:35

    Also note that this is happening in the context of the House majority actively pondering defaulting on payments as a political tool.

  262. eataTREE said,

    January 4, 2013 at 17:06

    The only thing worse than Layoff Day is being told about all the Layoff Day casualties two hours early, so you can delete their accounts from the corporate computer networks before they learn they’ve been canned. Call me Judasgoat.

  263. bbkf said,

    January 4, 2013 at 17:10

    my liver is hipster!!! just listening to a dude talk about diabetes and he just said my liver is turning stuff into glucose ironically…

  264. Helmut Monotreme said,

    January 4, 2013 at 17:25

    The only thing worse than Layoff Day is being told about all the Layoff Day casualties two hours early, so you can delete their accounts from the corporate computer networks before they learn they’ve been canned. Call me Judasgoat.

    What about being the guy who deleted the accounts and then having the downsized employees begging for network access so they can copy some of their own designs for their portfolio, without which, they will have a much harder time finding a job?

  265. American Christians said,

    January 4, 2013 at 17:37

    Glucuronic acid? Very hipster.

  266. Pupienus said,

    January 4, 2013 at 18:41

    The only thing worse than Layoff Day is being told you have to lay someone off or worse, being told that you have to cut x% of your personnel budget and you figure out the rest. in the first case you can at least say to yourself that you had zero choice in the matter.

  267. Substance McGravitas said,

    January 4, 2013 at 19:07

    I had to be a shop steward on layoff day once, and I had to try to help but watch people cry as they got led in and out of meetings with HR reps. Meanwhile the president of the place was getting six digits worth of alcohol treatment and was guaranteed his insane salary whether he stayed or not.

  268. VCarlson said,

    January 4, 2013 at 19:16

    There was a toxicology lab across the street from the company of my first downsizing that called all employees out to the parking lot (no room big enough for all) and announced, via bullhorn, that some employees would find pink slips on their desks when they went back. This was about 25-30 years ago, I think.

  269. bbkf said,

    January 4, 2013 at 19:21

    There was a toxicology lab across the street from the company of my first downsizing that called all employees out to the parking lot (no room big enough for all) and announced, via bullhorn, that some employees would find pink slips on their desks when they went back. This was about 25-30 years ago, I think.

    that is a scene i would have expected to see in ‘office space’…wow, that is tittyflipping stone cold…

  270. Pupienus said,

    January 4, 2013 at 19:44

    POOP

  271. Tintin said,

    January 4, 2013 at 20:12

    New Thread! Yay!!!

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