Dec
12

The Red Queen is Toppling Over




Posted at 4:02 by Cerberus


Says here that the ship I’ve invested all my self-worth into has crashed into an iceberg. Beginning coping amnesia in 5…4…3…

B. Daniel Blatt, Gay Putz:
Obama’s remarks in Michigan & his partisan nature

It’s been a while since we last peeked in on America’s Dumbest Homosexual. Heck, we haven’t even really said hi to our favorite Quisling blog since back in October.

And that’s a shame, because we’ve been missing what is proving to be a rather entertaining extended meltdown. These are people who have aligned exclusively with those who hate them, with those who do not entirely believe people like Dan are even human. And have done so entirely out of animus for non-whites and a belief that doing so will somehow make them special.

And well, now that a black man has won himself re-election largely on the backs of the increasing electoral power of non-white men and women of all colors? At the same time that gay rights is starting to rocket forward on the backs of “leftist” activism and the professional homophobe market is starting to collapse, leaving no special place for wanna-be capos?

It’s starting to… affect Dan.

Shorter (or the last port before Jungle):

  • Obama’s not the President! He’s not! And thus he’s not supposed to be out pretending to be the president! Mommy, make him hide in a cave for 4 years so I can pretend he wasn’t re-elected!

That’s… one coping strategy.

The decision that President Obama, the head of the federal government, made yesterday to wade into the politics in one state seemed a defining one.

Oh no, he di’int! How dare… the president of the United States talk about something happening in said states that affects real people in the nation he is the legitimate top elected official of!

I mean, presidents never interject on state and local issues.

And especially not when said issues are part of a multi-state trend of right-wing governors ignoring campaign promises, the needs and wills of their constituents, and sometimes the law in order to screw over real people and rights that were fought for over centuries because they think it will give them a short-term partisan financial advantage.

But really, that gall only lasts a short time before we get to Dan’s real issue with Obama’s comments on “right to work”.

Instead of being the postpartisan political healer he claimed to be in the 2008 election, he seems to feel that he just has to interject himself into contentious political issues, not as the mediator, but as the combatant.

Yes, Dan, is deeply, personally offended that Obama is acting like he has any place with “real officials” having opinions on “political issues”. It’s like that no-good nigger sheriff thinks that just because he was overwhelmingly voted into the office of President twice over, he has a right to talk down to his betters.

And besides, didn’t he say that he was post-partisanship? Oh, that was all of our ferocious spin of the man when we aren’t calling him (literally in many cases) Malcolm X’s love child? Well, um, he promised, so he’s not allowed to act all presidenty! He just gets to sort of sit there not saying anything so that those damn liberal kids can pretend they’re all cool because seeing a black man doesn’t give them a five-hour heart attack, while the nice white men who should have won dictate how our country looks.

Um… no.

No, Dan, it doesn’t work like that.

He won.

He won big. He won big twice. And after you and your ilk has thrown everything they could, he still continues to be America’s choice on how things should be run. If you didn’t like that, maybe you should have tried sucking less… or perhaps sucking more, so that you didn’t need to displace all your sexual frustration and loneliness on poor brown-skinned people.

He seems more interested in playing partisan politics than in working with the opposing party to effect a consensus.

Yeah, it’s almost like he won an election that was rather starkly about which vision of America Americans most supported or something. And almost like Republicans have been abusing good faith for a solid 4 years to try and turn every good idea that could legitimately help people into a never-ending call for unilateral surrenders in the name of “compromise” and “consensus”.

You succeeded, Dan. You and your doppelgangers in Congress managed to finally tarnish the Eternal Optimist enough that he no-longer tries to punt your football. You’re just going to have to deal with having a black president and the beds you have made.

BONUS 1:

So he continues on for a bit, with a bunch of wingnut rants trying to smear the people legitimately angry at the Michigan’s government unilaterally eliminating worker rights. And then we get this:

I had meant this to be a longer post, addressing the frustration we Republicans feel in the wake of Obama’s victory that we’ll be subject to four more years of his divisive rhetoric, but by the time I got to this post, I had little energy to write. I have been working a great deal on my fantasy epic and have now completed (and am busy editing) the second chapter of the epic and finding myself scribbling notes for the third chapter.

Just last night, I “heard” a scene in my head which soon became the concluding paragraphs for the first part of the first book. So, if my blogging is slower than usual, it’s because I’m investing my writing “energy” into other endeavors.

Leaving aside the fact that “the frustration we Republicans feel in the wake of Obama’s victory” couldn’t come through louder if he tried to hook his dog-whistle up to an air-raid siren, we get that last bit about his blogging speed.

On the two days of December 10th and the 11th (both weekdays), Dan has posted no fewer than 10 individual posts under his name.

I can only conclude that “other endeavors” is the street name given to a special blend of meth and coke that Dan is relying to get through this troubling mental time.

BONUS 2:

The latest post up on the Gay Patriot site is devoted to a new conservative radio show uber spectacular that Bruce and other luminaries of the right-wing will be collaborating on.

Who are some of these other bright, totally not flaming out, lights of the right’s best and brightest?

From the The Daily Caller – Matt Lewis

Ooh, a hack who could only manage a gig at Tucker Carlson’s vanity press. Be still my poor beating heart!

And from the Conservative Daily News, Michelle Ray (@GaltsGirl)

A Stepford Wife who couldn’t manage to land herself a televised gig in a landscape where right-wing networks are desperate to throw up a vaguely young, vaguely attractive face to try and convince their septugenarian viewership that their views are still hip and with it. Who else?

From Breitbart.com – Mary Chastain

Someone who still hasn’t caught onto the fact that Breitbart’s empire has returned to so much swamp gas with his inebriated passing. Well, at least that’s the bottom of the barrel-

PJTV’s @VodkaPundit, Stephen Green

Pajama Media TV… I don’t need a punchline here. He provided one for me. But at least this “all-star cast” can’t get anymore emba-

Conservative Twitter celebrity, Kevin Eder (@keder)

Really?

A “twitter celebrity”, huh?

So, what is ol’ Kev bringing to the table other than a face exactly like that one frat douche you knew in college that you always wanted to deck*?

Well, a list of tweets that are pretty much boilerplate copy-and-pastes from the daily talking points interspersed with such illuminating dashes of wit as:

It’s sort of amusing how seriously leftists take themselves. Get a grip and a sense of humor, loons!

Yeah, apparently Gay Patriot is so much on the “rise” that he’s stooped to having to fill air time with the Cool Coach troll.

I’d feel sadder for them all if they weren’t such vile traitorous bastards.


‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. Apparently, alternating between anger and denial is going to be conservatives’ coping strategy for the next 4 years of Obama’s presidency as well. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™

*Seriously.

He’s that guy. He’s all the that guys.

583 Comments »

  1. N__B said,

    December 12, 2012 at 4:07

    Taking one’s self seriously.

  2. Fenwick said,

    December 12, 2012 at 4:07

    Thanx for the pointer in the last thread, Cerb

  3. bbkf said,

    December 12, 2012 at 4:15

    I FEEL DIRTY!!!

    yeah…i followed the link in the first comment…take my advice…don’t…here’s an excerpt of the excerpt v to the k (who bills himself an ‘international arms dealer’) chose to highlight from his novel:

    Twyla undid the the front of her shirt, almost letting her long, pale breasts slide out, teasing him: “I told you I was going to get you.”

    Daniel: “Here? In the team room?”

    Twyla giggled, a dry and heartless sound: “Oh, if these walls could talk. That cage behind you is where I gave Kevin Jelenik the blowjob of his life, right about where you’re standing, in fact. I did Matt Hoffman in the shower. He was so big it was hard to get him inside me, hurt like a bitch, but I got him in me… most of him, enough of him. Alec was jealous.”

    Daniel felt a little stirring as she recounted her exploits with the pride of Jim Sweeney bragging about pass completions.

    She ran a hand along the top of Coach Judge’s desk. “And you’ll never guess who did me on this desk.”

    i fell barfy now…there’s not enough wine…

  4. kg said,

    December 12, 2012 at 4:16

    Gay Patriot Rising?

    btw, anyone seen el gato negro? Thought that cat was cool.

  5. kg said,

    December 12, 2012 at 4:20

    Aw sheesh, bbkf.
    why’d ya hafta go and …

  6. Smut Clyde said,

    December 12, 2012 at 4:21

    almost letting her long, pale breasts slide out
    … and slither across the floor…

  7. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 12, 2012 at 4:25

    These are people who have aligned exclusively with those who hate them, with those who do not entirely believe people like Dan are even human.

    To be accurate, many of the common taters there are the people who hate fags. Can’t be arsed and etc. but not a few of the PutzRioters are on record over there with astonishingly (well, it is astonishing in a way) nasty vile hateful screeds against gays.

    It would boggle if one was not appreciative of the depths of self-loathing that Dan and his fellow “gay patriots” exhibit.

    * Haven’t read the post yet, hope I’m not just restating shit.

  8. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 12, 2012 at 4:35

    It’s sort of amusing how seriously leftists take themselves. Get a grip and a sense of humor, loons!

    And THAT is why we continue to visit Teh GayPutzRiot. No writer, even one who, unlike Dan, has actually sold a script/book/fortune cookie, could invent such a wildly and transparently self-unaware character as Dan.

  9. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 12, 2012 at 4:38

    Major Kong is complicit, I’m sure of it.

    http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2012-12-11/fedex-overcharged-customers-for-years-sealed-e-mail-says.html

  10. N__B said,

    December 12, 2012 at 4:41

    I blame the chickens.

  11. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

    December 12, 2012 at 4:41

    He’ll come clean…at the Daily Kos.
    ~

  12. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 12, 2012 at 4:43

    He’s that guy. He’s all the that guys.

    OFFS, though a number of years separate me and my knowledge from him, I know that guy. I fucked him in his frat room several times that summer when he was drunk as shit. “Dame mas dame mas!” was what I heard though I’m sure he said it in English.

  13. kg said,

    December 12, 2012 at 4:59

    Whatever we do, let’s not talk about gun violence.

  14. VCarlson said,

    December 12, 2012 at 5:16

    You mean, the horrible things done to those poor defenseless guns?

  15. Calming Influence said,

    December 12, 2012 at 5:25

    The only difference I can spot between this one frat douche and all of the one frat douches I remember from college is that I don’t recall any of those one frat douches ever wearing pink. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. And it doesn’t appear to do anything to mitigate his one douchiness.

  16. Calming Influence said,

    December 12, 2012 at 5:31

    Calming Influence’s turn-offs: Long breasts, pale or otherwise.

  17. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 12, 2012 at 5:43

    Healing is when Republicans kick you in the face.

  18. tensor said,

    December 12, 2012 at 5:48

    “… Coach Judge’s …”

    To be fair, he was a mid-season replacement for the late Coach Dredd Scott.

  19. Smut Clyde said,

    December 12, 2012 at 5:49

    Present for Calming Influence!

  20. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 12, 2012 at 6:11

    “Long” breasts? WTF? Do. Not. Want.

  21. N__B said,

    December 12, 2012 at 6:19

    Get along, little breasties
    Get along.

  22. bbkf said,

    December 12, 2012 at 6:22

    almost letting her long, pale breasts slide out
    … and slither across the floor…

    that almost made some ‘rebel red’ come out my nose…and hubbkf is looking at me in a weird way…

    i am wrapping presents and drinking wine…is there any other way to wrap pressies?

    also, did y’all look at my damn christmas tree?

  23. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 12, 2012 at 6:31

    Excellent solstice tree bbkf. Shiny.

  24. tigris said,

    December 12, 2012 at 6:51

    Do… your…
    breasts hang low, do they wobble to and fro, can you tie them in a knot, can you tie them in a bow

  25. bbkf said,

    December 12, 2012 at 6:52

    caaaaaaaaan you throw them over your shoulder like a continental soldier…do…your…breasts…hang…low…

  26. bbkf said,

    December 12, 2012 at 6:53

    Excellent solstice tree bbkf. Shiny.

    well, thank you…i sometimes need validation…

  27. bbkf said,

    December 12, 2012 at 7:05

    i just love how dan-o gets his knickers in a twist because of bronco bama saying,
    Obama received loud applause at a Michigan engine plant when he said we shouldn’t be ‘‘taking away your rights to bargain for better wages and working conditions.’’

    The president says that the right-to-work bills are more about ‘‘giving you the right to work for less money.’’

    he rants about bronco being divisive, combative and partisan… (with nothing to back that up) and that he should be making nice with the republicans instead of listening to the people…and really? when he’s actually doing his job, they’re pissed off that he’s actually doing it and not playing golf?

  28. bbkf said,

    December 12, 2012 at 7:21

    okay, just because it’s not that long and it only gets steadily worse, here’s the rest of the excerpt from gay patriot commenter v the k:

    Daniel guessed: “Jim Sweeney?”

    Twyla laughed: “No. Not Jim. Not here. You know what a date with Jim Sweeney is like? It’s great if your idea of a good time is watching a guy lift weights for two hours and then fucking for a minute and a half. I’ve aborted two of his babies; humanity should thank me.”

    Daniel was tired, every part of his body but one didn’t want to be having this conversation. Daniel heard himself asking her, “Why do you do this?”

    Twyla she tilted her chin coquettishly: “Maybe because I just like it. Maybe I just want to be remembered.”

    Daniel: “You really want to be remembered as the girl who had sex with every player on the football team.”

    Twyla shook her head, dismissing his foolishness: “Not every player, just the senior varsity.”

    Daniel rolled his eyes. “Why?”

    Twyla sighed. “I know I’ll never be thought of as the smartest girl, or the prettiest. But this way, I’ll be remembered for something.”

    Daniel took a deep breath and resolved himself. “I guess you’ll have to settle for being the girl who had sex with every guy on the football team but one.”

    Twyla: “If that’s the case, Daniel Balthazar, people are always going to wonder about the one.”

    Daniel: “What do you mean?”

    She slid off the desk and walked toward him, slowly.

    can anyone guess who has no clue about women?

  29. VCarlson said,

    December 12, 2012 at 7:23

    he rants about bronco being divisive, combative and partisan…

    We all know that in Wingerland (spelling?), “being divisive” is defined as “not compromising with us,” which is known to others as “You give me what I want, and in exchange, I take what I want.”

  30. VCarlson said,

    December 12, 2012 at 7:24

    Oh, and they get pissed when Bronco plays golf, too.

  31. bbkf said,

    December 12, 2012 at 7:27

    Oh, and they get pissed when Bronco plays golf, too.

    are you implying that wingnuts will be pissed no matter what
    bronco does?
    .
    .
    ,
    .
    huh…i guess i never thought of it that way…

  32. VCarlson said,

    December 12, 2012 at 7:29

    Daniel took a deep breath and resolved himself.

    resolved himself? I can guess what he thinks he means, but I wonder how he solved himself (like an equation?) the first time.

  33. VCarlson said,

    December 12, 2012 at 7:32

    huh…i guess i never thought of it that way…

    Yeah, their behavior is very subtle.

  34. CRA said,

    December 12, 2012 at 8:34

    “Twyla undid the the front of her shirt, almost letting her long, pale breasts slide out,”

    I knew a gay guy whose partner was a professional artist. Early in his career, though, he had never seen a woman naked. Called upon to draw one, I’m told he depicted the vagina facing forward. His misconception was easily corrected and he’s made alot of money illustrating nudes since then.

  35. Joe Max said,

    December 12, 2012 at 8:55

    What the hell is that thing in the stand on the desk behind brohiem in the photo, on the right? It’s cut off and I can’t figure out what the hell it is. A mirror? A globe of the moon? A death-ray device?

  36. Another Kiwi said,

    December 12, 2012 at 9:06

    I think it’s a dinner gong Joe Max. For scaring away woodpeckers from Mr. Woodenhead.

  37. Major Kong said,

    December 12, 2012 at 9:08

    Major Kong is complicit, I’m sure of it.

    I wish I could say I’m getting a piece of that action but no such luck.

    I’m sure some senior VP got a nice bonus out of it.

  38. Rick Massimo said,

    December 12, 2012 at 14:51

    I have been working a great deal on my fantasy epic and have now completed (and am busy editing) the second chapter of the epic and finding myself scribbling notes for the third chapter.

    If you’re EDITING the second chapter, you haven’t COMPLETED the second chapter. Anyone who has ever written anything that anyone besides their mom has read and liked knows that.

    This is gonna be awesome.

  39. bbkf said,

    December 12, 2012 at 15:51

    This is gonna be awesome.

    i for one hope dan-o’s *epic* contains lots and lots of long, pale, slithering breasts…

  40. Bozo the Cocksucker said,

    December 12, 2012 at 16:05

    What is it which him and double definite articles? The The Daily Caller, the the buttons. Is he a massive Matt Johnson fan or something?

  41. Bozo the Cocksucker said,

    December 12, 2012 at 16:06

    Says the idiot who can’t tell the difference between “with” and “which”. MIND BOMB

  42. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 12, 2012 at 16:19

    Maybe the comma is a typo and it’s just that the breasts, have, been, pale, for, quite, some, time.

  43. g said,

    December 12, 2012 at 16:35

    The decision that President Obama, the head of the federal government, made yesterday to wade into the politics in one state seemed a defining one.

    Indeed. Why didn’t he show some decorum and restraint, like George W. Bush did in the Terry Schiavo matter?

  44. bughunter said,

    December 12, 2012 at 16:39

    can anyone guess who has no clue about women?

    Can anyone guess who the Mary Sue is in that scene?

  45. Arakasi said,

    December 12, 2012 at 16:43

    If you’re EDITING the second chapter, you haven’t COMPLETED the second chapter. Anyone who has ever written anything that anyone besides their mom has read and liked knows that.

    He’s following the writing process that brought us the quality literature of the Left Behind series: write 20 pages in the afternoon, revise & edit the next morning, and never, ever look at those pages again.

  46. Arakasi said,

    December 12, 2012 at 16:45

    Can anyone guess who the Mary Sue is in that scene?

    You just made me imagine Dan with long, pale breasts. I hate you.

  47. Bozo the Cocksucker said,

    December 12, 2012 at 16:46

    What the fuck kind of name is “Twyla”?

  48. Pryme said,

    December 12, 2012 at 16:50

    Holy Crap, bbkf; that’s some Pulitzer material right there.

    Twyla sighed. “I know I’ll never be thought of as the smartest girl, or the prettiest. But this way, I’ll be remembered for something.”

    I don’t take this line lightly; this is, in a nutshell, how he views women (or how he thinks they view themselves).

    And seriously: Daniel Balthazar?!? Was “Johnny Bloodstorm” already copyrighted of something?

  49. Bozo the Cocksucker said,

    December 12, 2012 at 16:58

    He was going to go with Daniel Batman, but Warner Bros. threatened to come down and kick him to death.

  50. bughunter said,

    December 12, 2012 at 17:05

    Twyla is a good ole country girl name, pretty much guaranteeing a wingnut pedigree.

    And don’t be mistaken. He is both characters in that scene. Daniel is who Dannyboy wishes he was in high school – star jock with a thing for other jocks.

    And Twyla is who he fantasizes about being when he masturbates…

  51. bughunter said,

    December 12, 2012 at 17:11

    This is probably the ‘Twyla’ Dannyboy is picturing himself as…

    Very NSFW.

  52. Helmut Monotreme said,

    December 12, 2012 at 17:11

    Most awkward fantasy ever. I assume he’s self publishing because the Penthouse forum didn’t think it was believable.

  53. Bitter Scribe said,

    December 12, 2012 at 17:29

    These are the worst sex scenes I’ve read since Father Andrew Greeley.

  54. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 12, 2012 at 18:23

    These are the worst sex scenes I’ve read since Father Andrew Greeley.

    You’re just Bitter.

  55. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 12, 2012 at 18:25

    And by “editing” he means “doing a search-and-replace for ‘teh’.”

    He has to do that ever since he accidentally added it to his dictionary and can’t figure out how to remove it.

  56. Bozo the Cocksucker said,

    December 12, 2012 at 18:26

    <blockquote"I’ve aborted two of his babies; humanity should thank me.”

    <blockquote"I’ve aborted two of his babies; humanity should thank me.”

    <blockquote"I’ve aborted two of his babies; humanity should thank me.”

    <blockquote"I’ve aborted two of his babies; humanity should thank me.”

    <blockquote"I’ve aborted two of his babies; humanity should thank me.”

    <blockquote"I’ve aborted two of his babies; humanity should thank me.”

    <blockquote"I’ve aborted two of his babies; humanity should thank me.”

    <blockquote"I’ve aborted two of his babies; humanity should thank me.”

    <blockquote"I’ve aborted two of his babies; humanity should thank me.”

  57. Bozo the Cocksucker said,

    December 12, 2012 at 18:27

    <blockquote"I’ve aborted two of his babies; humanity should thank me.”

  58. Bozo the Cocksucker said,

    December 12, 2012 at 18:27

    “I’ve aborted two of his babies; humanity should thank me.”

  59. Bozo the Cocksucker said,

    December 12, 2012 at 18:27

    WHAT THE FUCK.

  60. Bozo the Cocksucker said,

    December 12, 2012 at 18:28

    DON’T TELL ME TO SLOW DOWN WORDPRESS YOU’RE NOT MY REAL DAD

  61. Humanity said,

    December 12, 2012 at 18:33

    Bozo the Cocksucker said,

    December 12, 2012 at 18:27 (kill)

    “I’ve aborted two of his babies; humanity should thank me.”

    Uh, thanks?

  62. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 12, 2012 at 18:42

    We are waiting, breath muchly bated, to hear just WTF you’re talking about, you cock sucking clown.

  63. JohnR said,

    December 12, 2012 at 18:44

    I’d bet that “Twyla” is Twyla Tharp, just as Judy is always Judy Garland, not that there’s anything wrong with that.

  64. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 12, 2012 at 18:48

    We are waiting, breath muchly bated, to hear just WTF you’re talking about, you cock sucking clown.

    This is true whether you’re talking about Bozo or the subject of the post.

  65. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 12, 2012 at 18:56

    Related to unfinished stories.

  66. Bitter Scribe said,

    December 12, 2012 at 19:17

    “Twyla undid the the front of her shirt, almost letting her long, pale breasts slide out,”

    Were they like sandbags?

  67. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 12, 2012 at 19:25

    You slackers are not helping me avoid this pile of PL/SQL code I have to write. I guess I’ll actually have to be productive today. Harumph.

  68. bbkf said,

    December 12, 2012 at 19:29

    And don’t be mistaken. He is both characters in that scene. Daniel is who Dannyboy wishes he was in high school – star jock with a thing for other jocks.

    And Twyla is who he fantasizes about being when he masturbates…

    point of order here…dan-o is NOT the author of this egregious affront to readers everywhere…it’s one of his commenters who goes by the nym ‘v the k’…and who is an international arms dealer…the excerpts are from his *novel* which he wrote for the november novel writing competition that i used to think would be cool to participate in…until i visited the site…not as author-ey as i imagined…

    perhaps i’m just a literary snob…

  69. noen said,

    December 12, 2012 at 19:29

    Drudge finally loses it. Goes full N word.

    “‘N*GGER. N*GGER. N*GGER. N*GGER. N*GGER. N*GGER. N*GGER.’

    http://www.drudgereport.com/

    Is it peak wing nut now?

  70. bbkf said,

    December 12, 2012 at 19:30

    “Twyla undid the the front of her shirt, almost letting her long, pale breasts slide out,”
    Were they like sandbags?

    is that not one of the most revolting descriptions ever?

  71. Thread Bear said,

    December 12, 2012 at 19:34

    She had long, pale breasts in a black dress
    And her buttons she undid
    Just one look I was a bad mess
    ‘Cause almost out they slid

  72. tigris said,

    December 12, 2012 at 19:35

    Were they like sandbags?

    Yes except for the clattering.

  73. El Manquécito said,

    December 12, 2012 at 19:37

    I’ll help OBS. I’m about to order a sack of malt and was thinking about going with some ordinary American 2 row. I’ve been using Maris Otter for years and was thinking that maybe the 2 row would be a little crisper, a more narrow flavour profile. Then I realized I hadn’t used it in so long it might have changed. Your thoughts?

  74. bbkf said,

    December 12, 2012 at 19:39

    from the drudge:

    before he’s done serving up his just deserts

    really?

  75. Another Kiwi said,

    December 12, 2012 at 19:40

    almost letting her long, pale breasts slide out,”
    Food safety tip ma’am, keep your Turkey breasts in the refrigerator.

  76. Fenwick said,

    December 12, 2012 at 19:41

    bbfk: I looked at your tree twice (at your first hint … and then via the link). I liked it the first time and was going to comment whenever I caught up the thread. The second time I liked the Tree even more.

    ((To other Sadlies: You must engorge the photograph of bbfk’s tree to fully appreciate the whimsey of the Birds on the Branches(*) … and the wonderful composition and lighting of the photograph.))

    (*) Is anyone familiar with the Birds of Bright Plumage? Which reminds me, has anyone heard from Steerpike?

    Also, bbfk, thanks muchly for the two hilarious Twyla excerpts. I chuckled throughout them.

    Also congrats to you and tigris, the Winners of the Thread,:

    tigris said, at 6:51

    Do… your…
    breasts hang low, do they wobble to and fro, can you tie them in a knot, can you tie them in a bow

    bbkf said at 6:52

    caaaaaaaaan you throw them over your shoulder like a continental soldier…do…your…breasts…hang…low…

    Well isn’t that a bag of tits?

  77. Fenwick said,

    December 12, 2012 at 19:48

    Smut Clyde:

    (In Homer-donut-trance): Mmmmmmmmmm Dali …..

  78. bbkf said,

    December 12, 2012 at 19:48

    i need to find a pic of a bag of tits…could be most useful…

  79. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 12, 2012 at 19:51

    “Twyla undid the the front of her shirt, almost letting her long, pale breasts slide out,”
    but before they did, her breast herders rounded them up, lassoed them and returned them to their pens. I watched with fascination at the daring expertise of those valiant breast herders, which leads to the conclusion that they could not be union thug breast herders but must be PATRIOTIC REAL AMERICAN breast herders.

  80. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 12, 2012 at 19:57

    I am struck both by the diversity of images and the absence of relevant images that a google image search “bag of tits” returns.

  81. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 12, 2012 at 19:58

    I’ll help OBS. I’m about to order a sack of malt and was thinking about going with some ordinary American 2 row. I’ve been using Maris Otter for years and was thinking that maybe the 2 row would be a little crisper, a more narrow flavour profile. Then I realized I hadn’t used it in so long it might have changed. Your thoughts?

    I’ve used Great Western or Briess American 2-row almost exclusively as a base malt for years, and I make many English styles (Brown, Porter, Pale, etc.). I only use something else when I’m trying to be really true to a traditional recipe (which I only occasionally do). I’ve had great luck with them and I haven’t noticed much difference when using the English stuff (I’ve used Maris Otter a few times in my Brown).

    Not sure if that helps or not, but thanks for the distraction.

  82. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    December 12, 2012 at 20:01

    . I have been working a great deal on my fantasy epic and have now completed (and am busy editing) the second chapter of the epic and finding myself scribbling notes for the third chapter.

    He’s writing a supernatural romance in which a sparkly white Mormon vampire bones the bejeezus out of him and whisks him off to live in a big White House.

  83. Another Kiwi said,

    December 12, 2012 at 20:04

    That is one of life’s great mysteries Pupienus. The results for flock of tits are not much better

  84. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 12, 2012 at 20:07

    Tits on a bag just isn’t quite the same.

  85. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    December 12, 2012 at 20:08

    OFFS, though a number of years separate me and my knowledge from him, I know that guy. I fucked him in his frat room several times that summer when he was drunk as shit. “Dame mas dame mas!” was what I heard though I’m sure he said it in English.

    You goofball, it’s spelled “Damn, my ass!”

  86. El Manquécito said,

    December 12, 2012 at 20:08

    Yeah buddy that helps. I only make one kind of ale, a West Country pale but strong (6% ABV) and I think the Maris Otter has had me in a rut so I’m gonna make a change and go Amurican.

  87. Fenwick said,

    December 12, 2012 at 20:11

    Thread Bear said,
    December 12, 2012 at 19:34

    She had long, pale breasts in a black dress
    And her buttons she undid
    Just one look I was a bad mess
    ‘Cause almost out they slid

    I miss the poetry / haiku / limericks / lyrics jams in Sadlytown. So thanx, Bear. Your verse scans perfectly into the song when I play it in my head.

  88. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 12, 2012 at 20:12

    I’m gonna make a change and go Amurican.

    Cool, as a bonus it should be noticeably cheaper too.

  89. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 12, 2012 at 20:17

    There once was a bag of long tits
    That gave a writer some fits
    After trying to master
    His literary disaster
    He said “fuck it, I’ll stick to writing obits”

  90. DAS said,

    December 12, 2012 at 20:19

    Speaking of frat douches, I wish Kerry would worked the word “frat” into one of his debate arguments — y’all know how GW Bush would have responded to that.

  91. Fenwick said,

    December 12, 2012 at 20:25

    Huzzah for OBS!

    Also, I’m going to actually contribute something to the thread momentarily….

  92. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    December 12, 2012 at 20:31

    Speaking of frat douches, I wish Kerry would worked the word “frat” into one of his debate arguments — y’all know how GW Bush would have responded to that.

    “War Criminal” would have been better.

  93. Pupienus said,

    December 12, 2012 at 20:38

    Ouch.

    Eighty international scientific societies have endorsed the concept of a primarily human-caused climate crisis that is already starting to threaten the health and well-being of millions, and soon to be billions, of people in the next few decades. The total number of scientific organizations that dispute this is zero. If you were watching a basketball game where the score was 80 to 0, with one minute left in the fourth quarter, and you decided to bet your entire nest egg on that losing team, no one would argue that you were not severely delusional.

    http://truth-out.org/news/item/13099-schizophrenics-psychopaths-holding-america-hostage?tsk=adminpreview

  94. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    December 12, 2012 at 20:40

    I can’t let go of Dan’s fantasy novel… it surely promises to be a train wreck. I had to dust off an old bit.

    The title of Dan’s fantasy novel is The Lyin’, the Bitch, and the Closet. It’s a tale of a self-deceiving gay man who finds a magical land in his closet. This magical land is ruled by an evil, bitchy queen who has cursed the land so it’s always last call, but there are no NSA hookups to be had. The hero of the tale meets the magical bear, Assslam, who teaches him to embrace his self-loathing so they can team up to defeat the evil, bitchy queen.

  95. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    December 12, 2012 at 20:44

    The title of Dan’s fantasy novel is The Lyin’, the Bitch, and the Closet.

    You know there’s a scene in which the Queen offers Dan some Turkish prison delight.

    There is no scene at the Beavers’ house… there are no beavers in Dan’s fantasy at all.

  96. El Manquécito said,

    December 12, 2012 at 20:44

    Cool, as a bonus it should be noticeably cheaper too.

    So one would think but it’s only a $10 difference/sack. Otter has been remarkably consistent over the years and gives a home brewer the raw material to make real beer. 2 row sometimes (out of date info to follow) is too thin for a round full palate essential to real ale. Glad to hear it works for you, I’ll give it another try.

  97. Helmut Monotreme said,

    December 12, 2012 at 20:54

    You slackers are not helping me avoid this pile of PL/SQL code I have to write. I guess I’ll actually have to be productive today. Harumph.

    I would have thought PL/SQL itself was a disincentive to write PL/SQL code.

  98. Fenwick said,

    December 12, 2012 at 21:02

    FuckFuckFuckFucketyFuck. You. WP.

    I worked on that Real Contribution a long time and was close to punching the Submit Comment button. I only needed two more links, you lousy fucked-up POS. I hateyou-Ihateyou-Ihateyou!!!!

    You sack-of-shit, that Comment contained huge rotten mangoes [plural] from the Deepest Dive I have ever done in all my time at Sadlyville. The detail and the mockability potential were wonderful. So Fuck You with a rusty harpoon, you POS.

  99. Fenwick said,

    December 12, 2012 at 21:03

    Also too and moreover, Fuck You WP.

  100. Fenwick said,

    December 12, 2012 at 21:04

    I’m so pissed off, I leaving for a while. FYWP.

  101. Bitter Scribe said,

    December 12, 2012 at 21:31

    Drudge finally loses it. Goes full N word.

    As far as I can tell, this is just another version of the “how come they can say nigger and we can’t?” lament that is a strong contender for Most Tiresome Conservative Butthurt.

  102. Wordpress said,

    December 12, 2012 at 21:37

    Hey, if you had to sit here and listen to posts about long, pale breasts flopping around juxtaposed with idiotic right-wing noodling day in and out, you’d be less than eager to work too.

  103. bbkf said,

    December 12, 2012 at 21:48

    wordpress doesn’t want to work…why does wordpress hate murika?

  104. Another Kiwi said,

    December 12, 2012 at 21:51

    Fenwick, it’s a bastard when that happens, you should copy and save Big Important posts before you post which is ,like , so helpful, I know.

  105. VCarlson said,

    December 12, 2012 at 21:56

    Yeah, that’s what I always tell myself (with added invective) when I watch my browser close up & disappear after having laboriously typed in some masterpiece on my teenytiny screen. Never helps.

  106. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 12, 2012 at 22:00

    I would have thought PL/SQL itself was a disincentive to write PL/SQL code.

    Yes, yes it is.

  107. bughunter said,

    December 12, 2012 at 22:04

    i need to find a pic of a bag of tits…could be most useful…

    Like this?

    I am struck both by the diversity of images and the absence of relevant images that a google image search “bag of tits” returns.

    You’re doing it wrong…

  108. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 12, 2012 at 22:04

    So one would think but it’s only a $10 difference/sack. Otter has been remarkably consistent over the years and gives a home brewer the raw material to make real beer. 2 row sometimes (out of date info to follow) is too thin for a round full palate essential to real ale. Glad to hear it works for you, I’ll give it another try.

    $10 difference is a noticeable amount when we’re talking about $40-$50 for a bag. More money for hops.

    My English brown ale is nice and rich with a delightful creaminess, even though it’s only a 5% beer.

    Not sure what your mash normally is, but try a single infusion mash held at 150 (F) for 45 minutes to an hour with the 2-row and see how that does for you.

  109. bughunter said,

    December 12, 2012 at 22:07

    BTW, bbkf, I gazed at your tree pic last nite and after admiring its “less is more” quality, was struck by how warm and well kept your digs look.

    Then I read your caption…

    (Sry I didn’t post there. It was bedtime for mini-bug.)

  110. bughunter said,

    December 12, 2012 at 22:12

    So I’ve spent the morning’s free time reading the New Yorker article written by the guest on NPR’s Fresh Air last nite.

    Wow. Fucking wow. The Army torturtested hundreds of soldiers with hallucinogens and nerve agents in the 50′s and 60′s. This assertion isn’t new. But Raffe Khatchadourian’s story “Operation Delirium” goes into new detail revealed by interviews with and notes provided by one of the lead doctors at Edgewood Arsenal in Maryland.

    It’s a long read, but worth it.

  111. Pupienus said,

    December 12, 2012 at 22:21

    For those non compos, er computer folks,

    PrettyLips/SQealL like a pig.

  112. bbkf said,

    December 12, 2012 at 22:22

    Then I read your caption…

    haha…we are probably harder on our house than need be…it’s just that it’s OLD and the people who ‘remodeled’ it before we bought it did a horseshit job…so it seems we are constantly doing something to it…

  113. Pupienus said,

    December 12, 2012 at 22:25

    You’re doing it wrong…

    Nope. Those are “breasts,” not “tits.” Not even “teats” (did you mean “bag of treats?”).

  114. bughunter said,

    December 12, 2012 at 22:25

    Like this?

    Oh, and BTW, the website that I found that image on (this time) is a fine example of Poe’s law…

  115. bughunter said,

    December 12, 2012 at 22:29

    Nope. Those are “breasts,” not “tits.”

    Oh, well to get what you want, you have to tweak things a bit, and massage the subject matter. I’m sorry you’re not fondle the result.

  116. Pupienus said,

    December 12, 2012 at 23:19

    bughunter said,

    December 12, 2012 at 22:29 (kill)

    Eeeewwww. I have nothing against you straights but why do you always have to flaunt it?

  117. bughunter said,

    December 12, 2012 at 23:21

    Bwahahaha!!

    I’m sure Ferrell loves this one, too.

  118. Major Kong said,

    December 12, 2012 at 23:25

    Another pilot wanted me to trade two days of my Huntington WV line for two days of Edmonton. Two long flights and a 36-hour layover vs six short flights.

    He apparently has a girlfriend in Huntington.

    Meanwhile I’m in Edmonton Siberia Arctic Circle it’s hopeless we’ll have to eat the sled-dogs to survive.

  119. Smut Clyde said,

    December 12, 2012 at 23:28

    almost letting her long, pale breasts slide out
    … and slither across the floor…

    Philip Jose Farmer was there already, in “Blown”.

    the breasts reeled off the steep slope of the ribs and fell down, turning over. One landed on its legs and scuttled off, but the other breast lay on its back–its front, actually–and kicked its many red spider legs until it succeeded in getting on its feet–so-called.

  120. N__B said,

    December 12, 2012 at 23:32

    it’s hopeless we’ll have to eat the sled-dogs to survive.

    Avoid the livers. Too much vitamin A will kill you, nastily.

  121. Pupienus said,

    December 12, 2012 at 23:34

    Remember that viral pic of the two guys in Washington getting their marriage license? They got class I tells ya!.

  122. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 12, 2012 at 23:38

    Remember that viral pic of the two guys in Washington getting their marriage license? They got class I tells ya!.

    That photo is so fuckin’ classy that there’s dapperness oozing out of the bottom of my monitor!

  123. bughunter said,

    December 12, 2012 at 23:39

    Pup, your assumptions lead you astray.

    Here’s more for bbkf*, and a screencap, too.

    *Ffwd to item 1 at 3:26. Some rather assertive “tweaking” at 3:43.

  124. Pupienus said,

    December 12, 2012 at 23:43

    All this talk of slithering boobies and such. bughunter MADE me post this.

  125. Pupienus said,

    December 12, 2012 at 23:50

    Since Teh Ho lurks here a fair bit I have to say I’m NOT DROPPING XMAS GIFT HINTS.

  126. bughunter said,

    December 12, 2012 at 23:51

    Doze guyz are adoorable!

    Will Ferrell’s mustache has nuttin’ on those beards.

  127. bughunter said,

    December 12, 2012 at 23:53

    Ooh…

    It appears I’m in danger of appearing out of sync. Here’s one for Pup, then.

  128. Suezboo said,

    December 12, 2012 at 23:55

    Pup, those were delicious. The rugby players, I mean, obviously.Thank you for that little (well, not really) treat.

  129. jim the heretical anti-cliff lemming said,

    December 12, 2012 at 23:59

    LONG PALE SLIDING BREASTS FHTAGN!

    Drudge finally loses it

    Prompted my first visit to Drudge’s Kingdom O’ Memetic Detritus … wow … it’s like NRO & Weekly World News had a baby, & HuffPo is nursing it with its long pale bazongas.

    You slackers are not helping me avoid this pile of PL/SQL code I have to write. I guess I’ll actually have to be productive today. Harumph.

    Yesterday I got the bright idea to export Ubuntu to my ancient dust farm laptop – a beast so systematically depraved that it won’t even let me format it, let alone go online. Much Anglo-Saxon vernacular & several hours of futile effort later, I then got the even brighter idea to futz about with the boot process of my working laptop, so I could have a slightly faster startup along with a nifty log-in screen.

    Finally, the already-brutally-abused Ubuntu met its match. Last week I installed an entire environment in the worst possible way & somehow got it more or less functional, but a little boot-fuckery (heh) allowed me to swan dive into Le Mer De Merde: my Grub went Full FUBAR & I bricked this bitch LIKE A BOSS. Tried sneaking back into it with a USB installation to no avail. No way into either Windows or Ubuntu = one very pissed off lemming. Sooooo … I tweaked the boot order & used another USB to spontaneously upgrade my Ubuntu – & lost nearly a month’s work in the process. I was literally up until dawn painstakingly getting the mojo back so I could have my brand new baby running smooth & looking sexeh. Now I have five Desktop Environments rather than twelve – & signifigantly more grey hair than I did Tuesday morning.

    TIL: if it ain’t broke, perhaps one ought not commence fucking with it.

    http://truth-out.org/news/item/13099-schizophrenics-psychopaths-holding-america-hostage?tsk=adminpreview

    Quoted for relevance.

    Psychopaths have exactly the traits necessary to push non-psychopaths out of the way so as to attain positions of real power, along with a fundamental urge to get ever more power. Too bad they can’t resist abusing them to everyone else’s detriment.

    I say it every chance I get: if we fail to resolve our collective mental hygiene crisis, our odds of solving ANY of our other problems is piss-poor at best … & we guarantee more & nastier ones where they came from. If we make real progress on beating it down, a lot of those other problems either disappear or become much less dire.

    I’m just stone cold crazy that way, I guess.

  130. Woodrowfan said,

    December 13, 2012 at 0:04

    I was just at World-o-Crap reading about pink slime and John Stossel, and then i come here to read about long breasts. gag

  131. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 13, 2012 at 0:14

    NOT DROPPING XMAS GIFT HINTS.

    OREGON

    Corvallis Beer Supply, Corvallis

    Hmm, wonder if he’s got any left…

  132. bbkf said,

    December 13, 2012 at 0:14

    Eeeewwww. I have nothing against you straights but why do you always have to flaunt it?

    MOOBS

  133. bbkf said,

    December 13, 2012 at 0:16

    I’m sure Ferrell loves this one, too.

    enh…dude knows guys can go down on girls, right?

  134. Helmut Monotreme said,

    December 13, 2012 at 0:27

    If we make real progress on beating it down, a lot of those other problems either disappear or become much less dire.

    But once we get rid of the psychopaths in positions of power, trust and authority, Once we clear them out of the world of education and the military, finance and business, what do we do with that particularly nasty bag of not particularly niceness? They certainly won’t all be happy merely being youtube comment trolls or Something Awful forum goons.

  135. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 13, 2012 at 0:28

    enh…dude knows guys can go down on girls, right?

    He gets his sex advice from Ace

  136. Major Kong said,

    December 13, 2012 at 0:33

    OK, I just got up, I’m hungry and I’m not meeting the Captain for dinner for another hour and a half.

    Fortunately I have part of a “Scooby Snack” in my bag. What’s a Scooby Snack? It’s a snack box that the company gives us on night flights. Some airlines will sell you one of these for $20.

    So what do we have?

    1 package Old Wisconsin brand pepperoni “Real Genuine Taste!”
    1 package Jacob’s Cream Crackers “The original and best!”
    1 piece Glacier Ridge Farms Swiss style Pasteurized Process Cheese Food Swiss Type Flavor
    1 Package Geraldine’s Bodacious Wedding Cookies (all natural Santa Barbara wedding cookies)
    1 miniature Kit Kat bar

  137. Major Kong said,

    December 13, 2012 at 0:34

    Mmmmmmmmmm……….tasty!

  138. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 13, 2012 at 0:35

    I got a Scooby Snack box like that on my last Allegiant flight. It was a real bargain at $5. I was not hungry for whole moments after eating it.

  139. Major Kong said,

    December 13, 2012 at 0:39

    The pepperoni wasn’t too bad.
    The cheese tasted about like the plastic it was wrapped in.

  140. Spearhafoc, who waits dreaming in his house at R'lyeh said,

    December 13, 2012 at 0:49

    “Twyla undid the the front of her shirt, almost letting her long, pale breasts slide out,”

    Ewwww! That’s it, I no longer like breasts.

  141. VCarlson said,

    December 13, 2012 at 0:56

    Ewwww! That’s it, I no longer like breasts.

    Based on that bit, I think it’s pretty obvious the author has never seen any. Nor does he want to. A co-worker of mine once remarked that she was certain brassieres were designed by gay men, the one group of people with no interest in women’s breasts.

  142. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 13, 2012 at 0:56

    Well I’ll be. This is a pleasant surprise.

  143. CRA said,

    December 13, 2012 at 0:58

    So I’ve spent the morning’s free time reading the New Yorker article written by the guest on NPR’s Fresh Air last nite.

    Wow. Fucking wow. The Army torturtested hundreds of soldiers with hallucinogens and nerve agents in the 50?s and 60?s. This assertion isn’t new. But Raffe Khatchadourian’s story “Operation Delirium” goes into new detail revealed by interviews with and notes provided by one of the lead doctors at Edgewood Arsenal in Maryland.

    It’s a long read, but worth it.

    I caught the NPR interview about halfway in, didn’t realize it was a New Yorker story, thanks.

    I wonder if the class action lawsuit some of the soldiers are tryin’ will pan out. Probably not. But it should. Even if you’re an enlisted man, I don’t see how the govt. has the right to put you in a wind tunnel full of “VZ” then lock you in a padded room for between three days and two weeks while you’re tripping on what sounds like a sheet of acid a day.

  144. jim the heretical anti-cliff lemming said,

    December 13, 2012 at 1:01

    Condolences to the Major being stuck in “it’s hopeless we’ll have to eat the sled-dogs to survive” … especially in December. YOW! Welcome to Wind Chill Hell.

    Mercifully, hypothermia eventually leads to numbness.

    Still vividly remember when I was ten years old, going to the can in the Edmonton Greyhound bus depot … where some bohunk had obviously (being a true country gentleman) taken his (evidently very well-fed) horse into one of the stalls to relieve itself.

    Now THAT’s class.

  145. Pryme said,

    December 13, 2012 at 1:12

    Is it peak wing nut now?

    That will never happen, because it implies a level of acceptance of reality.

  146. Suezboo said,

    December 13, 2012 at 1:13

    Tomorrow’s weather : quote :”Extremely hot , uncomfortably humid, gale force winds ”
    Wanna swap, Major?

  147. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 13, 2012 at 1:16

    That’s a tough call.

  148. Pupienus said,

    December 13, 2012 at 1:26

    HAHAHAHAHAHA

    Watched a couple bozos try to drive a moving truck into the parking garage. One bozo is standing inside waving the other guy forward. I saw the “BAR HANGING HERE ON CHAINS IS THE MAX HEIGHT YOU BOZOS!” thing get pushed out of the way and the guy inside is waving the driver forward still. Bozo guy saw it too. Few seconds later there’s a LOUD WHOOOOOSSSSSHHHHHHH. Driver guy and bozo exchange stupid looks and decide that maybe they should back out.

    http://imgur.com/qm07o

    In the aftermath, bozo guy says “If you saw it move why didn’t you stop me from being a fucking idiotstop us?!?!?!

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

  149. Pupienus said,

    December 13, 2012 at 1:32

    It was a nice bit of excitement to break up the very interesting but slooooooow crane erecting itself for the new bridge. http://trimet.org/pm/construction/bridgecam-omsi.htm

  150. Pupienus said,

    December 13, 2012 at 1:33

    Fuck. “Gving itself an erection” is what I meant.

  151. gocart mozart said,

    December 13, 2012 at 1:34

    The reviews are in for Django Unchained.

    “Not a good movie for the start of another fairly difficult presidential tenure. It’s a too-easy grab at convulsive payback. It celebrates the uglier parts of our inner equilibrium. We know we are being manipulated to love that guy, hate this guy, delight in the suffering and well-deserved comeuppance of the hero. We’re supposed to cheer for the wrenching murder of ourselves. It’s worse than Avatar.

    Watching it will re-ignite the angers stoked by previous such barely-veiled revenge dramas as were Amistad and the previously referenced Basterds. If you like this sort of thing, you’ll like this sort of thing.

    Read more: http://www.americanthinker.com/2012/12/tarantinos_django_unchained.html#ixzz2EsqQFrK4

  152. gocart mozart said,

    December 13, 2012 at 1:39

    First mango, the rest are worse.

    Leftist self haters…..

    • Yesterday 03:20 AM
    •16 Likes

    Read more: http://www.americanthinker.com/2012/12/tarantinos_django_unchained_comments.html#disqus_thread#ixzz2EsrnJeZI

  153. Spearhafoc, who waits dreaming in his house at R'lyeh said,

    December 13, 2012 at 1:40

    Wait, does that article criticise Inglourious Basterds for being historically inaccurate?

  154. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 13, 2012 at 1:46

    We’re supposed to cheer for the wrenching murder of ourselves.

    No no no, I’M supposed to cheer for the wrenching murder of YOU.

    Hooray!

  155. gocart mozart said,

    December 13, 2012 at 1:47

    Yes, and I think he implies that it was a bit too mean to the oppressed confederates, I mean Ayrians

  156. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 13, 2012 at 1:47

    It was a nice bit of excitement to break up the very interesting but slooooooow crane erecting itself for the new bridge. http://trimet.org/pm/construction/bridgecam-omsi.htm

    The sky up in P-town looks exactly like the sky here in CornValley. Whodathunkit.

  157. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 13, 2012 at 1:49

    gocart mozart said,

    Read more:

    It’s like you hate us or something!

  158. Major Kong said,

    December 13, 2012 at 1:50

    Tomorrow’s weather : quote :”Extremely hot , uncomfortably humid, gale force winds ”
    Wanna swap, Major?

    Actually sled-dog is pretty tasty if you cook it right.

  159. gocart mozart said,

    December 13, 2012 at 1:50

    We are, again, under a different director, being toasted over an Oliver Stone goblet of faux history. History as rewritten by nihilist jokers with an agenda. No gang of do-gooders rode in “to kill nazzies,” as Brad Pitt drawls in Basterds, just as no Django vision of justice and retribution rode the South astride a palomino, toting a Remington, with a perplexingly adorable German dentist-cum-bounty hunter.) Sensitive viewers are equally revolted by the excesses of polite rich company, represented by the arrogant-effete plantationer Leo DiCaprio and the noblesse not obliged Don Johnson as Big Daddy.

    Read more: http://www.americanthinker.com/2012/12/tarantinos_django_unchained.html#ixzz2Esuw45E4

  160. gocart mozart said,

    December 13, 2012 at 1:54

    “We’re supposed to cheer for the wrenching murder of ourselves. It’s worse than Avatar.”

    He hates all colored people, even blue ones with tails.

  161. Pupienus said,

    December 13, 2012 at 2:04

    cum-bounty hunter

    I’m guessing they target the cum-eunuchs.

  162. Pupienus said,

    December 13, 2012 at 2:06

    Historical fiction – how the fuck does it work?

  163. Pupienus said,

    December 13, 2012 at 2:06

    It’s worse than Avatar.

    UNPOSSIBLE!

  164. Spearhafoc, who waits dreaming in his house at R'lyeh said,

    December 13, 2012 at 2:10

    I am shocked, SHOCKED, to learn that the ending of Inglourious Basterds didn’t happen in real life.

  165. CRA said,

    December 13, 2012 at 2:36

    Normally I don’t like Christmas music, but:

    Little Dealer Boy / Willie Nelson

  166. CRA said,

    December 13, 2012 at 2:38

    We’re supposed to cheer for the wrenching murder of ourselves.

    So long as it’s just onscreen, what’s the problem? I think a movie about people like me getting their just desserts could be pretty fucking awesome.

  167. Woodrowfan said,

    December 13, 2012 at 2:39

    Ewwww! That’s it, I no longer like breasts.

    I hear that the interwebs has a few pics of nice breasts if you want to see what they’re supposed to look like.

  168. Spearhafoc, who waits dreaming in his house at R'lyeh said,

    December 13, 2012 at 2:45

    Breasts on the Internet? Don’t be ridiculous.

  169. Woodrowfan said,

    December 13, 2012 at 2:46

    Breasts on the Internet? Don’t be ridiculous.

    It’s just a rumor. I’ve never seen any myself…

  170. tigris said,

    December 13, 2012 at 2:47

    Since Teh Ho lurks here a fair bit I have to say I’m NOT DROPPING XMAS GIFT HINTS.

    Word to the wise, the place I went to was MOBBED.

  171. tigris said,

    December 13, 2012 at 3:03

    Breasts on the Internet!

  172. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    December 13, 2012 at 3:14

    Oh, and BTW, the website that I found that image on (this time) is a fine example of Poe’s law.

    Christwire has been outed as satire a while ago. I used to post comments there frequently, but it stopped being fun because too many people took the site seriously.

  173. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    December 13, 2012 at 3:15

    The internet also has a lot of pictures of great tits.

  174. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    December 13, 2012 at 3:20

    Watched a couple bozos try to drive a moving truck into the parking garage. One bozo is standing inside waving the other guy forward. I saw the “BAR HANGING HERE ON CHAINS IS THE MAX HEIGHT YOU BOZOS!” thing get pushed out of the way and the guy inside is waving the driver forward still. Bozo guy saw it too. Few seconds later there’s a LOUD WHOOOOOSSSSSHHHHHHH. Driver guy and bozo exchange stupid looks and decide that maybe they should back out.

    But which of the bozos was sucking cock?

  175. bughunter said,

    December 13, 2012 at 3:27

    BOOBIE HAT

    (found here)

  176. CRA said,

    December 13, 2012 at 3:32

    But which of the bozos was sucking cock?

    If they’d-a stuck to that activity, there’d be no falsifying an auto insurance claim …

    Possibly, I guess. The rule is, driver never sucks

  177. bughunter said,

    December 13, 2012 at 3:44

    OK, my last sweater puppy post of the day.

    Promise!

    (Oddly, I’m actually more of a legs and ass man… )

  178. Austin Loomis said,

    December 13, 2012 at 3:54

    I swear I saw “Homer Vile” listed in Drudge’s bottom-bar. (Isn’t that where he keeps the eggs?)

    Also, fuck Col. Yen Lo Ketchum in all three ears:

    “Well, Mike,” he wrote to another veteran, “I guess some people find it satisfying to look back and condemn what doctors and others did half a century ago, especially if it lends itself to sensationalized movies, and entitles them to disability pensions.”

    Yak dung tastes good like a cigarette should.

  179. Pupienus said,

    December 13, 2012 at 4:35

    AS. AS a cigarette should. Criminy, people, you STILL can’t get it right!

  180. N__B said,

    December 13, 2012 at 4:38

    Kiss my as.

  181. tigris said,

    December 13, 2012 at 4:53

    Bow-chicka-wow-wow…

  182. Jeffraham, Warm Cave said,

    December 13, 2012 at 5:49

    Go to bed, immediately!
    .

  183. Major Kong said,

    December 13, 2012 at 5:54

    Go to bed, immediately!

    I wish I could. I’m tired but I need to stay up a while to stay on a night schedule.

    I haven’t been home for longer than a day and a half since the 27th.

    On the plus side, when I get home Friday morning I’d done until after Christmas.

  184. Jeffraham, Warm Cave said,

    December 13, 2012 at 5:56

    On the plus side, when I get home Friday morning I’d done until after Christmas.

    Very nice, Major.

    Also, thank you for any chickens that show up on my doorstep in time for the hollerdays.
    .

  185. Major Kong said,

    December 13, 2012 at 5:59

    I’ll be sure to kick some out when we pass over Nashville.

    “As God is my witness, I thought chickens could fly”.

  186. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 13, 2012 at 6:00

    Hy Suezboo, yer very welcome! Did you note that those rugby players paly for my team? Oh yes they do!

    BTW, I had a bit of difficulty with Zoo City. Good read no doubt but that book, even more than Moxyland, was slightly impenetrable in many respects for someone like me who is largely clueless vis a vis Sud Afrik folklore, traditions, and et cetera.

  187. Jeffraham, Warm Cave said,

    December 13, 2012 at 6:02

    I’ll be sure to kick some out when we pass over Nashville.

    For reference, I’m just 100 yds. west of the little marina due south from John C. Tune airport (“the little airport that could… be used for landing Gulfstream 5s”). Y’know… to help with the aim.
    .

  188. Major Kong said,

    December 13, 2012 at 6:13

    Shameless shilling for my employer:

    http://abcnews.go.com/Nightline/video/inside-fedexs-superhub-christmas-rush-17930208

  189. Spearhafoc, who waits dreaming in his house at R'lyeh said,

    December 13, 2012 at 6:21

    I’m expecting an order of some indie movie DVDs and they’re taking forever to get here. I don’t know who they’re shipping with, but I’m going to go ahead and blame Major Kong for no particular reason.

  190. CRA said,

    December 13, 2012 at 6:35

    “As God is my witness, I thought chickens could fly”.

    I suppose they could, at one time, but it’s hardly your fault they’ve fallen by the wayside.

  191. tensor said,

    December 13, 2012 at 6:39

    Major Kong’s holiday wish is for FAA Santa to upgrade his Part 121 to Part 137, apparently.

    /aeronerd

  192. Fenwick said,

    December 13, 2012 at 6:44

    Okay, Imma gonna try again to make an Actual Contribution with high mockability content to a Sadlly thread. I am now (*) mostly an appreciative reader; cheerleader for the wit, creativity, projects, and interests of other Sadlies; and,

    (*) I’m sorta gun-shy of after getting fookin’ gang-tackled last spring for my political views about Leprosy and Plague. (Also, when I was a noob, I was flatly accused by one commenter of ‘lying’ about my effort to understand it and appreciate it.) Also picked up mucho friction over my opinions on military operations in Libya. Anyway, I’ve pretty much pulled the plug on inserting on political commenta:y; I need to reduce unnecessary stress and conflict in, especially during the Thanksgiving & War-on-Xmas season (which has been painful and difficult for many years.

    Okay, remember the excrable “Twyla” fiction written by ‘V of K’ that bbfk excerpted? Here is a Summary of data about V of K,, his self-written Biographical Notes, and his Synopsis of the his epic novel.

    Fenwicks’s rare On-topic (well sorta) Actual Contribution may offer new insights for interpreting V of K’s text.

    Summary
    Title of Novel: The Kicker
    Genre: Mainstream Fiction (*)

    Writing nym: JamScience527
    Avatar image: Poorly-proportioned tiger standing on hind legs upon a magic carpet, as seen against a photo-shopped Universe. ((No, I shit you not.))

    Age: 45
    Location: Frederick Maryland. [home of Fort Detrick; google it]
    Hobbies: Hiking, football, gaming, photography
    Favorite noveling music: Boards of Canada
    Occupation: International Arms Dealer
    Favorite books or authors: Neil Gaiman, Terry Pratchett, Victor Davis Hanson

    Author Bio

    I was born in Grand Rapids, MI and have lived in Michigan, Oregon, Arizona, South Carolina, and Maryland. My given occupation is tongue-in-cheek; I formerly worked for a large defense contractor developing proposals for selling weapons systems to foreign countries. I still work in proposal development, although my current employer does the much more mundane (but secure) work of supporting Federal IT. I am a convert to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and the father of three boys I adopted from foster care.

    Normally, I write science fiction; so writing a story set on contemporary Earth will be a big change for me. ((* see below))

    Synopsis of The Kicker

    My intended project is based on the Book of Daniel in the Old Testament, which I am reimagining as a story about high school football. In defiance of contemporary literary convention, my hero-protagonist is the rich jock; who is normally the antagonist in this type of story. My Daniel is a slightly autistic but very skilled placekicker for his varsity football team. He is facing his final season with immense trepidation, not knowing what life will hold for him once he is finished with football. His adolescent angst is heightened when his coach assigns him to mentor an incoming freshman kicker with problems of his own. Daniel wrestles with the conflict between what he wants to do with his life and what his parents want him to do, the social pressures of teenage life, and other First World Problems. Ultimately, his struggle (like the struggle of Old Testament Daniel) is the struggle to hold onto the truths that have guided his life and protected him against worldly pressures in an environment dominated by those whose values are in conflict with his.

    ——-
    Synopsis of V-of-K’s sci-fi epic World’s Apart

    Worlds Apart is a long, strange science fiction saga I began writing in the late 90′s and began publishing to the web in the early 00′s

    It is set over 5,000 years in the future. The backstory is that Humankind once built a Great Commonwealth of over 13,000 colonies spread across all four quadrants of the Galaxy. A hugely destructive way with a superior race of transdimensional beings known as Tarmigans annihilated the Commonwealth, leaving behind thousands of shattered and disconnected colony worlds. Two of the outermost colonies, Sapphire and Republic, were spared the Tarmigan Apocalypse, and over a thousand years later, began building ships to find lost human colonies and restore Galactic Civilization.

    The Worlds Apart books trace the journey of one such ship; the Pathfinder Ship Pegasus; an enormous, multi-generational starship carrying a crew of thousands. It is commanded by the irreverent, sarcastic, raging alcoholic Commander William Keeler. His crew is made up of people from his home planet of Sapphire, a culture of freedom-loving libertarians and free thinkers; and people from Republic, a planet run by authoritarian collectivists. (Most of the ‘Republickers’ left the ship in Book 6 before Keeler, defying orders, left the Perseus Quadrant of the galaxy to make a mad dash to find Earth, located in the Orion Quadrant).

    The conflict in the book is driven clashes of culture and personalities; but the stories are driven by descriptions of how human culture evolved differently on each of the planets encountered; driven by the environment, social pressures, and historical events on each different world.

    Masochists can read PDF’s of eleven ‘Books’ (probably chapters) of V of K’s Sci-Fi Epic.

    If your tastes run more to photos with captions, you MUST visit his website: http://www.vthek.net/

    ((This is the Comment that WP ate, btw)) Hey, can old Fenwick get some props for Deep Diving in a Mango Swamp? …

  193. Super Awsome USA said,

    December 13, 2012 at 6:46

    LIBERAL FAGETS ALWAYS CHEER AGAINS USA, WHY IS THAT, CAUSE THEY SUCK?

  194. Fenwick said,

    December 13, 2012 at 6:47

    ‘understand and appreciate hip-hop.’ I totally blame WP. Also gay abortions.

  195. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    December 13, 2012 at 6:53

    “Tarmigans”??
    Do they have feathered feet?

  196. Andrew Breitbart said,

    December 13, 2012 at 7:02

    I’m still dead.

  197. Major Kong said,

    December 13, 2012 at 7:06

    Synopsis of V-of-K’s sci-fi epic World’s Apart

    Sounds like what a Terry Goodkind sci-fi novel would be like. And that’s not a complement in any way, shape or form.

  198. Fenwick said,

    December 13, 2012 at 7:14

    Correction on the goofy avatar. (There is a larger version at the bottom on the website.) It is a CAT standing upright on a piece of flying BACON, seen against teh Universe.

  199. Smut Clyde said,

    December 13, 2012 at 7:35

    a CAT standing upright on a piece of flying BACON

    HOVER BACON.

  200. Fenwick said,

    December 13, 2012 at 8:17

    Pup: Thanx for the link to the Poli-Psych (TM) analysis and essay. (at 20:38, if the link below isn’t active).

    ((Recommended to all of Sadlyburg, in case anyone missed or skipped it. Well written; explores psychiatric pathologies….deftly interwoven with political illustrations–among them Rove–of right-wing, greedster, and denialist behaviors.))

    http://truth-out.org/news/item/13099-schizophrenics-psychopaths-holding-america-hostage?tsk=adminpreview

  201. bbkf said,

    December 13, 2012 at 8:34

    oh jaysus, the publisher of our local weekly, ‘the hooterville indigestion’ has gone full wingnut…i’ve *regaled* you in the past with some of his more egregious musings, but whoa…last week he quoted thomas sowell…and this week’s ‘guest editorial’ was from none other than joseph farah…

    he also took time to ponder this week about why doesn’t the rest of government bother to implement checks and balances against obama?!?!?! i rilly, rilly want to write a letter simply saying, ‘ummm..because there’s no reason to warrant extraneous fucking use of checks and balances you motherfucking moron?!?’

  202. Major Kong said,

    December 13, 2012 at 8:39

    why doesn’t the rest of government bother to implement checks and balances against obama

    Yeah, it’s amazing how John Boehner and Mitch McConnell just let Obama run roughshod over them.

    Hmmmm the stupid is strong with this one.

  203. bbkf said,

    December 13, 2012 at 8:42

    Hmmmm the stupid is strong with this one

    right? i wonder just exactly when bronco discoverd he held sway over the entire earth…

  204. bbkf said,

    December 13, 2012 at 8:52

    an aside: mandy pantinkin & stephen colbert = magic!

  205. bbkf said,

    December 13, 2012 at 8:59

    well, then throw in michael stipe also…omfg…

  206. jim the heretical anti-cliff lemming said,

    December 13, 2012 at 9:13

    Actually sled-dog is pretty tasty if you cook it right.

    Living out at Antoine Creek, I actually got to have some mountain-goat stew. It’s very unique … quite tasty, in fact.

    Poor Mom. That stew brought her to tears: she must’ve cooked that meat for about a day on end & it STILL didn’t get much more friendly after a good bloody ten solid minutes of enthusiastic chewing per cube than it presumably was when it was still playing hopscotch up & down the mountain with its buds.

  207. Djur said,

    December 13, 2012 at 9:25

    “Well, I spent so much time making sweet love on my wife that it’s hard to hear anything over the clatter of her long, pale breasts.”

  208. Babe Ruthless said,

    December 13, 2012 at 11:38

    Pupienus said,

    December 13, 2012 at 2:04

    cum-bounty hunter

    I’m guessing they target the cum-eunuchs.

    —-

    I LAFFED.

  209. bbkf said,

    December 13, 2012 at 16:41

    wow…glad hubbkf’s iphone is a wi-fi hotspot so I can hop on the ipad to comment on a dead thread…

  210. bbkf said,

    December 13, 2012 at 16:54

    well isn’t that a bag of tits! i can also go online with my laptop w/hubbkf’s iphone wifi…we just hit the interstate on the way to sioux falls…

    okay, tech time: i am working on my annual report/newsletter and have found a template that looks kinda like our website…is there a way i can bring some actual design elements from the website into my newsletter which is in publisher?

  211. Pryme said,

    December 13, 2012 at 19:07

    My parody meter must be dead, because this almost looks like someone made this with serious intent.

  212. bbkf said,

    December 13, 2012 at 19:28

    My parody meter must be dead, because this almost looks like someone made this with serious intent.

    i dunno…very well could be…the clinic we are at has been bombarding us with an abundance of christianity (verses EVERYwhere) and much much christmas decor and inspirational sayings…then i remembered..duh, this is a christian hospital system…

  213. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 13, 2012 at 19:31

    I think it is serious. Aside from the very earnest, non-ironic tone, the ” ACLU” choir? Only an actual nutcase would think that’s clever.

  214. Major Kong said,

    December 13, 2012 at 20:12

    My parody meter must be dead

    Mine shorted out and exploded sometime during the GOP Primary. I’m still picking shrapnel out of the ceiling.

  215. jim the heretical anti-cliff lemming said,

    December 13, 2012 at 20:26

    The staff at Goldman Sachs & JP Morgan are all wearing black armbands today.

  216. tigris said,

    December 13, 2012 at 20:28

    Jesus, crazy people, go ahead and say “Merry Christmas” to folks from late Oct to early Jan, it’s a free country. This also means you can’t control what other people say or think, you might as well get used to it.

  217. Major Kong said,

    December 13, 2012 at 20:31

    A couple weeks ago I ran into someone at work I hadn’t seen in a while. After we got done talking he said “Merry Christmas”.

    Now, when I was a kid I recall saying “Merry Christmas” on December 25th and maybe on Christmas Eve.

    When did this whole tradition of If I won’t see you again before Christmas I have to say “Merry Christmas” even if it’s October get started?

  218. DAS said,

    December 13, 2012 at 20:55

    When did this whole tradition of If I won’t see you again before Christmas I have to say “Merry Christmas” even if it’s October get started? – Major Kong

    About the time we Jews liberal Hollywood secular elitists (*) decided we were tired of feeling like second class citizens come Dec 25th and started saying something about it. Real ‘Murkins took it for an act of war and thus escalated all the Christmas rhetoric. Big business noticed that more Christmas means more presents and hence more profits … and whaddya know.

    * now, of course, the GOP has decided to gain the support of certain Jewish donors and of many evangelical Christians by supporting whatever the Likud wants to do in spite of how bad such actions are for the long term stability and security of the Jewish State becoming friendly to Israel, so direct attacks against the Jews must be changed to being dog-whistles. Indeed, the dog whistle has gotten so high pitched, some people with money financial resources than sense or real world experience (I’m speaking to you Pammycakes) don’t even remember the original group being attacked and happily use tried-and-true anti-Jewish rants in their writings, changing a few key words around to apply to “Muslim terrorists” rather than “Jewish money lenders”.

  219. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    December 13, 2012 at 20:58

    My parody meter must be dead, because this almost looks like someone made this with serious intent.

    The song mentions “no Christmas, no ‘Jingle Bells’”, which is bullshit. I have a real beef with people who think that “Jingle Bells” is a Christmas song. “Jingle Bells” is a basically a song about drag racing.

  220. VCarlson said,

    December 13, 2012 at 21:00

    I think it is serious. Aside from the very earnest, non-ironic tone, the ” ACLU” choir?

    Wow. I didn’t even notice the ACLU. Though I did notice they were rather pointing up the initials, I never got past “American Christian League” to read the redundant “Union,” which rather gives the game away. I was too busy noticing the apalling lyrics (Don’t you know any history? Have you no awareness of other people?) and the uniform whiteness of the “good Christian” actors.

    And if someone really *did* try to supress their religious beliefs* the ACLU (the real one) would be there defending them.

    *”Mine is the only TRUE religion, therefore the State must force everyone else to observe it” isn’t a religious belief – it’s a belief about one’s religion.

  221. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 13, 2012 at 21:12

    via Wash Monthly, Regret The Error’s year end. Even though we missed teh win due to herniated dick, Canuckistaniland typos above her weight.

    Also too note that Sadly, No! was current with the Most Viral Correction at the time it happened.

  222. jim the heretical anti-cliff lemming said,

    December 13, 2012 at 21:21

    more Christmas means more presents and hence more profits

    I work at a shipping facility, so I get to know how the big franchises are doing without reading a business website – & it has been crazy quiet for December over the last two weeks.

    It could just be winter storms at sea buggering up docking schedules, but I suspect there’s more than a little chronic Santa Fatigue going on right now. Slowly but surely, more & more people are starting to clue in & realize that maybe an annual ecological holocaust isn’t the best way to honour Bebe Jeebus … & that both for the wallet & the mental health, it couldn’t hurt to be Jewish for one day a year.

  223. not a gator said,

    December 13, 2012 at 21:40

    lol, this dude is bogged down by one chapter? not to brag or anything (that is to say, bragging/nachas ahoy), but my wife just finished two novels. The first is complete and she’s shopping art while the second is going through a grueling process of editing to prepare for publication. This while doing a more than full-time job. Yes, she laid back on other hobbies, but not that much. Her big thing is knitting and she’s still clacking away. Just finished an enormous throw for her best friend (with DNA cables) and puttering away on babbie cloths for all our friends that sprogged. Oh, and she’s also writing a 20-minute opera. The opera singers from the local university are always dropping by to putter around.

    Guess what, my wife has a conservative streak but she knows which side her bread is buttered on. As a queer woman, she often states she has no choice but to vote for the Democratic party, yellow dog as they come.

    Gay Patriot is a conservative because he sucks at everything and being a con is his way of still feeling like he’s a winner at something.

  224. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 13, 2012 at 22:07

    From Fenwick’s mango hunt:

    I am a convert to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints

    How fucking stupid do you have to be to convert to mormonism? I thought that’s why they had so many damn kids — nobody but children indoctrinated from birth would be stupid enough to believe their con. I find it absolutely inconceivable that anybody with a even semi-functional brain could look at the bullshit behind that “religion” and willingly choose to be part of it.

    But I’m a big ol’ meany athiest so WTF do I know.

  225. Pupienus said,

    December 13, 2012 at 22:10

    “Jingle Bells” is a basically a song about drag racing.

    Hey, sumbuddy had to do it!

  226. N__B said,

    December 13, 2012 at 22:11

    How fucking stupid do you have to be to convert to mormonism?

    My moron-i has a first name
    It’s J-O-S-E-F
    M moron-i has a second name
    It’s S-M-I-T-H
    I love to tithe him every day
    And if you ask my why I’ll say
    “‘Cause Joseph Smith has a way
    Of saying ‘You owe me dough today.”

  227. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 13, 2012 at 22:27

    How fucking stupid do you have to be to convert to mormonism?

    The Latter Day Saints are truly allupons with the missionary zeal. You’ve seen them going about in their crisp white starched shirts and black name tags. Much like conscription (Ann Romney compared religious Mission to military service), going on Mission is a required duty of young Mormon men – to bring the Word to the world.

    It is their full-time vocation for a couple years so you would expect at least some of them to become halfway decent at it. Basically, you throw enough shit against the wall, some is bound to stick – so despite the fact that thems missionaries are still Mormons, some of them will make a connection with the targets of their proselytizing. Ta da – a new tither.

  228. Pryme said,

    December 13, 2012 at 22:45

    The staff at Goldman Sachs & JP Morgan are all wearing black armbands today.

    Superman died AGAIN?

  229. Major Kong said,

    December 13, 2012 at 22:47

    How fucking stupid do you have to be to convert to mormonism?

    Glenn Beck, ’nuff said.

  230. Not Glenn said,

    December 13, 2012 at 22:49

    please PLEASE write about this:

    http://www.nypost.com/p/news/opinion/opedcolumnists/where_big_gop_bucks_could_matter_sud7apkPHDcFSVDDZkFDEL

    InstaDipsh!t says young women vote for whomever their fave mag says is cool

  231. Pryme said,

    December 13, 2012 at 22:58

    Build the dang…Death Star?

  232. Major Kong said,

    December 13, 2012 at 22:58

    New diary:

    http://www.dailykos.com/story/2012/12/13/1169386/-Flying-the-B-52-Part-2

  233. Pupienus said,

    December 13, 2012 at 23:06

    If anyone is offended by the following, blame OBS for MAKING ME SAY IT!

    While Moronism is such an obvious scam, a con invented by a serial fraudster, I don’t see it as any more far-fetched than living forever if you eat the flesh (real as in Catholicism or symbolic as in Protestantism mkes no difference) of a cosmic Jewish zombie to whom you telepathically profess your allegiance in which case he absolves you from the sin that he (his father, the zombie, it’s all equivocal except when it isn’t) put upon you because a woman he (see supra) manufactured from a human rib got taken in by a talking snake which he also made.

    Except some people insist that the zombie never was, or at least wasn’t God’s son, but that other shit TOTALLY HAPPENED like the whole world was flooded (except for all those parts of the world which were NOT where the folks who worshipped that god did not live, as the historical record clearly shows) and also some guy turned his walking cane into a snake (always with the snakes!) and did other totally awesome and unbelievable shit and so on.

    Except some other people insist that the zombie wasn’t actually a zombie, just a cool guy who was a propet but none the less essentially zero of what the zombie is alleged to have said applies because some guy (who, in a rare bit of historicity actually did exist…hmmm, like Joseph Smith, how ’bout that!) made up some totally different shit and this time THAT GUY was the TRUE prophet of god.

    Except some other other people who insist that there was a whole circus of gods and goddesses who did many fantastical things and THAT OTHER SHIT NEVER HAPPENED YOU STOOPID PIIPPLES!

    Except for some other other other people who insist that Xenu and et cetera. And the other^n people who insist some other shit. Rinse and repeat.

    Meanwhile we send people to the moon, make atoms blow apart, cure disease, predict the weather and all sorts of other stuff, fly around all over the place, talk to each other instantly from one side of the world to the other, yada yada all without relying on ONE BIT of what those insistent people insist is what’s going on and in fact all the “miracles” are due to shit we KNOW which shit contradicts just about EVERYTHING insisted upon by the insisters.

    Then you got your Raelians, your Heavens Gaters, your ESTers, …

    People are so fucking gullible.

  234. N__B said,

    December 13, 2012 at 23:10

    Pup -

    You forgot the people who every spring make (hopefully non-human) sacrifices in the hope that a group of baby bears will, in competition, emerge victorious in a manner that has eluded them since the Taft presidency.

  235. Helmut Monotreme said,

    December 13, 2012 at 23:18

    Pup-
    You’re crazy. Next you’ll say that offering up the hearts of our defeated enemies from altars on top of pyramids doesn’t please the gods who, in their mercy, will allow the sun to keep rising every day.

  236. Dr.KennethNoisewater said,

    December 13, 2012 at 23:26

    You’ve got to remember that these are just simple farmers. These are people of the land. The common clay of the new West. You know… Mormons.

  237. Major Kong said,

    December 13, 2012 at 23:30

    Build the dang…Death Star?

    And this time put a manhole cover over that exhaust port!

  238. cum eunuch said,

    December 13, 2012 at 23:37

    The Major’s latest diary is on the wreck list at the Great Orange Satan. Go read it people!

  239. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 13, 2012 at 23:44

    If anyone is offended by the following, blame OBS for MAKING ME SAY IT!

    I accept blame.

    Yeah, not limited to the mormons, it’s all fucking stupid. The mormon and L.Ron brands of stoooopid seem extra stoooooooooopiderer because they’re modern cons invented specifically to dupe people out of their cash.

    For some reason the whole “convert” thing just boggles my mind. I can accept that a little kid steeped in mystical stupidity throughout their entire impressionable childhood could be brainwashed enough to “believe” any religion’s utter bullshit. But why, as a grown, supposedly educated person, would anybody choose to believe in said bullshit? Just doesn’t make any damn sense.

  240. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 13, 2012 at 23:54

    cum eunuch said,

    The Major’s latest diary is on the wreck list at the Great Orange Satan. Go read it people!

    Well, I wasn’t going to*, but since a cum eunuch recommends it…

    *kidding, of course I was, good stuff Major.

  241. Suezboo said,

    December 14, 2012 at 0:00

    Thanks, Major.
    I have never flown a plane or had any desire to – the whole enterprise strikes me as wholly improbable – but I’m finding your diaries really fascinating.
    Please proceed.

  242. Major Kong said,

    December 14, 2012 at 0:18

    You’re right Suezboo.

    Stuffing your body into an aluminum tube full of highly flammable liquid and hurling it through the air at 500 mph is hardly a natural act.

  243. Helmut Monotreme said,

    December 14, 2012 at 0:26

    Stuffing your body into an aluminum tube full of highly flammable liquid and hurling it through the air at 500 mph is hardly a natural act.

    Is this why the Amish, vegans, and organic farmers are so under-represented in the Air Force?

  244. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 14, 2012 at 0:26

    Imbibing flammable liquid and racing down the road, however, is commonplace.

  245. Major Kong said,

    December 14, 2012 at 0:31

    Is this why the Amish, vegans, and organic farmers are so under-represented in the Air Force?

    I’d get kicked out of the Amish pretty quickly.

    “Brother Jebediah, show where it says in the bylaws that I can’t put a supercharged Chrysler Hemi in my buggy. If one horse be good then I sayeth 400 be better!”

  246. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 14, 2012 at 0:38

    “Brother Jebediah, show where it says in the bylaws that I can’t put a supercharged Chrysler Hemi in my buggy. If one horse be good then I sayeth 400 be better!”

    Oooh, now we know Major Kong’s real name is “Jebediah”! Is it OK if we call you “Jeb”?

  247. Major Kong said,

    December 14, 2012 at 0:40

    I’ve been called worse.

  248. gocart mozart said,

    December 14, 2012 at 1:01

    Death Star construction: Pro or Con?

    http://www.salon.com/2012/12/13/weird_news_white_house_must_respond_to_petition_to_build_a_death_star/

  249. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 14, 2012 at 1:09

    I’d get kicked out of the Amish pretty quickly.

    “Brother Jebediah, show where it says in the bylaws that I can’t put a supercharged Chrysler Hemi in my buggy. If one horse be good then I sayeth 400 be better!”

    If you’re only pulling 400 ponies from a Chrysler hemi you deserve to get kicked. The current versions do better than that in their normally aspirated form. While there were smaller displacement hemis what most people think of when hearing “hemi” is the legendary hemis of the 60s which made about 425 hp (although that was SAE gross whereas today the ratings are SAE net). The hemispherical head engines produced by the Chrysler Corp. In the 50s didn’t come close but those were never trademarked as HEMI.

    Only 11,000 of the 426 “Elephant” hemis of the 60s and 70s were made. My dad – a Chrysler man but that was before they fired all their good engineers – had one, in his New Yorker station wagon! My dad was a bit of a gearhead, I think that’s where all of us kids got it from.

    The hemis with Roots superchargers like you see at the drag strip put out over 1000 horses.

    /pupienus the gearhead

  250. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 14, 2012 at 1:12

    Oh, forgot to mention that Chrysler first worked with hemispherical combustion chambers with an inverted V-16 intended for the P-47(?) that made about 2500 horses. AIR, it was intended to supplement the Allison engines supply. It never saw production.

  251. Major Kong said,

    December 14, 2012 at 1:13

    If you’re only pulling 400 ponies from a Chrysler hemi you deserve to get kicked.

    I was thinking of the 341 Hemi in my 57 Desoto Fireflite.

  252. Major Kong said,

    December 14, 2012 at 1:14

    The problem with the hemi-powered Amish buggy is getting it to hook up. Those skinny wheels don’t give you much traction.

  253. Whale Chowder said,

    December 14, 2012 at 1:36

    The problem with the hemi-powered Amish buggy is getting it to hook up. Those skinny wheels don’t give you much traction.

    Stopping might be an issue also. Too.

  254. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 14, 2012 at 1:41

    I like the idea of MOAR POWAH as much as the next gearhead, but I think a nice light car with “enough” power is damn fun.

  255. Babe Ruthless said,

    December 14, 2012 at 1:43

    I’m literally sick about this: Apocalyptic Christians converting indigenous people and telling them to burn down their longhouses and destroy traditional heritage. Because native people are plagued by witches and demons that must be exorcised in order to receive Christ and money and miracles like streams being cleansed of toxic waste.

    Words fail.

    /rant

    http://indiancountrytodaymedianetwork.com/article/will-arson-attack-cause-holy-war-between-born-agains-and-natives-146274

  256. Babe Ruthless said,

    December 14, 2012 at 1:49

    *Allegedly.

  257. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    December 14, 2012 at 1:51

    It is their full-time vocation for a couple years so you would expect at least some of them to become halfway decent at it. Basically, you throw enough shit against the wall, some is bound to stick – so despite the fact that thems missionaries are still Mormons, some of them will make a connection with the targets of their proselytizing. Ta da – a new tither.

    I always figured the main purpose for the missionary work is to strengthen the commitment of the d00dz sent out to proselytize. They are thrown into a strange culture, paired up with someone who can keep tabs on them, and their only support network is 100% sect-related. There are no real distractions, they don’t really want to get to know their “host” culture, they want to change it (c’mon, Mitt convincing Frenchies to give up their wine was even less plausible than Mitt becoming PotUS). They are completely immersed in a Mormon microcosm, even while in the World-at-Large.

  258. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    December 14, 2012 at 2:02

    Meanwhile we send people to the moon, make atoms blow apart, cure disease, predict the weather and all sorts of other stuff, fly around all over the place, talk to each other instantly from one side of the world to the other, yada yada all without relying on ONE BIT of what those insistent people insist is what’s going on and in fact all the “miracles” are due to shit we KNOW which shit contradicts just about EVERYTHING insisted upon by the insisters.

    And just think what kind of world(s) we’d have if the past two-thousand years hadn’t been occupied by superstition, religious wars and all the attendant bullshit. Archimedes wept!

  259. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    December 14, 2012 at 2:04

    I’m literally sick about this: Apocalyptic Christians converting indigenous people and telling them to burn down their longhouses and destroy traditional heritage. Because native people are plagued by witches and demons that must be exorcised in order to receive Christ and money and miracles like streams being cleansed of toxic waste.

    That’s utter nihilism, it’s basically the Wahhabi branch of Christianity.

  260. tigris said,

    December 14, 2012 at 2:30

    That article was nauseating. If there were such a thing as demon possession the druggie arsonist and gibberish-spewing witch smellers would be the likelier candidates.

  261. Babe Ruthless said,

    December 14, 2012 at 2:39

    @tigris @BBBB

    I know, right? Sickening.

    The horrific history of murder and abuse in Xian residential schools in Canada is finally coming to light. Such pure evil was carried out in those places and across the country. Now our apocalyptic Xian prime minister is prepared to completely dispossess native people, in the name of the holy Free Market.

  262. Bitter Scribe said,

    December 14, 2012 at 3:30

    Yeah, wiping out 95% of the Native population through disease, slaughter and starvation wasn’t enough. Now we have to shove Jeebus down their throats.

  263. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 14, 2012 at 3:32

    Gah! I just…

    Gah!!!!

    I hate people….

  264. CRA said,

    December 14, 2012 at 3:55

    The department that awarded me my BA was dedicated to a type of secular humanism that’s very respectful of religion. If I want to understand people, I have to examine their beliefs and practices; it’s not enough to say, “your creation story, taken literally, is absurd.” Most of them are. A more interesting question might be, what has been (or could be) made of this material?

    I detest how fundamentalism dumbs down and perverts the reading of religious texts, usually for some powermonger’s benefit. Like any cultural expression, religious thought and practice should be everyone’s business, an “open source” (and optional!) buffet of heuristics for better, more meaningful living.

    My interest in freedom of information extends to its use, however radically transformative. Joseph Smith made something out of the materials at hand, but I cannot approve. He was one of these prophets who wants to shut down vast swaths of human potential, to reshape the experience of being human in his own image, to engineer a body of outwardly-hale people too feeble to poke at a house of cards for fear of losing themselves and their community. Of course he needed a holy book to accomplish these things. Some people need a book to be the worst of things a book can be: a box tool small for the mind, a bully’s test of coerced credulity, etc.

    If I had to pick a decent prophet or religious leader, I’d name somebody like Guru Nanak (founder of Sikhism). He sounds like a reasonable fellow whose impact was more good than bad. I’m not rating him #1 or anything. I’m not even theistic.

  265. CRA said,

    December 14, 2012 at 4:03

    Correction: “a box TOO small for the mind,” etc.

  266. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    December 14, 2012 at 4:07

    Gah!!!! I hate people….

    Leeches, on the other hand, are awesome. Warning: shameless blog-h00ring.

  267. kg said,

    December 14, 2012 at 4:33

    nice post b^4

  268. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 14, 2012 at 4:46

    I came here to be cheered up. That Other Place is full of Gloomy Gusses and Depressing Debbies.

    I rode the ~27 miles to work this morning in 21F weather. On the scooter, of course. I’m a man, baby.
    .

  269. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    December 14, 2012 at 4:49

    nice post b^4

    Thanks, old chum! I owed it to the awesome Dr to do the subject a little justice. Oh, and the featured drink was awesome, a bloody Mary with a lot of horseradish and cracked black pepper.

  270. CRA said,

    December 14, 2012 at 4:51

    I’m a man, baby.

    You’re a man-baby. A scooter-mounting babyman.

    21 degrees? Was there any ice, man?

  271. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 14, 2012 at 4:52

    Was there any ice, man?

    Naw. All the rain fell mainly on Monday.
    .

  272. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 14, 2012 at 5:23

    Ooh! Here’s a pick-me-up: I’ve won $14 in the last week on recent MegaMillions & Powerball drawings. That’s never happened before.
    .

  273. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    December 14, 2012 at 5:36

    Ooh! Here’s a pick-me-up: I’ve won $14 in the last week on recent MegaMillions & Powerball drawings. That’s never happened before.

    Baby, don’t fall into that trap… I used to work with a guy who thought his number would be “due” if it didn’t come up in a drawing for weeks.

  274. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    December 14, 2012 at 5:37

    Is it me, or does Firefox seem to be extra “buggy” these days? I can’t seem to get it to run well on my laptop, and it’s even acting up on the work computer.

  275. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 14, 2012 at 5:57

    I did a fresh install of Firefox on the Windows machine at work and for some reason it did better. Which was a relief because I rely on it. (Uninstall, reinstall, and an uninstall/reinstall of Java as well).

    But yes, I think it’s getting flakier.

  276. jim the heretical anti-cliff lemming said,

    December 14, 2012 at 6:48

    Is it me, or does Firefox seem to be extra “buggy” these days?

    Just got KDE Plasma on mah Ubuntu & Ye Olde Firefox has never been faster – maybe it’s because both are open-source & run on the same basic code. Acceleration is also pretty skookum: for an oldish box & a notoriously fatass browser, 40FPS is smokin’! (/brag)

    Seconding the uninstall-reinstall (though I wonder how/if you can save/re-import bookmarks).

    Turning it off & back on again: it’s not just for hardware any more.

  277. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 14, 2012 at 7:28

    BBBB: be (heh) sure to disable any extensions you don’t absolute need also. Too.

    And then if/when that doesn’t help try Opera or Chrome.

  278. Major Kong said,

    December 14, 2012 at 7:29

    The meteor shower was pretty amazing. We were watching it all the way down from Edmonton.

  279. N__B said,

    December 14, 2012 at 15:54

    How can you tell the difference, while flying, between a meteor shower and an alien invasion?

    AFAF

  280. bbkf said,

    December 14, 2012 at 16:10

    okay, that’s the weirdest ‘anything for a feel’ question i have ever read…

  281. Pryme said,

    December 14, 2012 at 16:42

    Now c’mon; how do we know that this wasn’t really him?

  282. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 14, 2012 at 16:44

    I always figured the main purpose for the missionary work is to strengthen the commitment of the d00dz sent out to proselytize. They are thrown into a strange culture, paired up with someone who can keep tabs on them, and their only support network is 100% sect-related. There are no real distractions, they don’t really want to get to know their “host” culture, they want to change it (c’mon, Mitt convincing Frenchies to give up their wine was even less plausible than Mitt becoming PotUS). They are completely immersed in a Mormon microcosm, even while in the World-at-Large.

    This is undoubtedly true – but the nominal purpose of the Mission probably gets served as well, if only incidentally. Let’s say it takes ten minutes before they start in on the next prospective convert. Two years with weekends off is 500 days, and since they would not be doing a whole lot else, ten hours a day is probably not unreasonable. This means that d00dz cycle through their spiel 30,000 times. Even with a 0.01% success rate, that’s an expected value of three converts.

  283. Pryme said,

    December 14, 2012 at 16:45

    How can you tell the difference, while flying, between a meteor shower and an alien invasion?

    FOOLISH HUE-MON; DO NOT QUESTION THE WORD OF THE GALACTIC SUPREME-

    I mean, there’s like, totally way-groovy ways to tell, homey-dude. Radical, yo!

  284. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 14, 2012 at 17:31

    B^4: I play $2/drawing. Voluntary education tax. :)

  285. Fenwick said,

    December 14, 2012 at 17:47

    Major Kong said,

    Build the dang…Death Star?

    And this time put a manhole cover over that exhaust port!

    Laffed, I did. Looking forward to B-2: Part 2 at Kos, after I ketchup the thread here.

  286. Fenwick said,

    December 14, 2012 at 18:17

    Pup & OBS: I’m thinking of sending a cut-and-paste of your comments about religion to my step-brother in Oregon, an ardent and articulate atheist for decades. I enjoy discussing religion and politics with him, though there are major points where we disagree. Anyway, thanx for your commentary.

    It occured to me that all three of you live in Oregon: Pup in Portland … OBS in Corvallis … my brother in Eugene. Is there some sort of Atheist Flouride in the water?

  287. Fenwick said,

    December 14, 2012 at 18:26

    N_B: Liked your Oscar Moroni song.

    OBS & BBBB: Your links at Sadlyburg are inactive.

  288. Fenwick said,

    December 14, 2012 at 18:37

    That’s utter nihilism, it’s basically the Wahhabi branch of Christianity – BBBB

    This.

  289. Fenwick said,

    December 14, 2012 at 18:42

    Must read (if you haven’t already): CRA at 3:55 above .

    Terrific.

  290. kg said,

    December 14, 2012 at 19:39

    Guess I’m going to have to repeat myself.

    WTF

  291. Major Kong said,

    December 14, 2012 at 19:40

    How can you tell the difference, while flying, between a meteor shower and an alien invasion?

    50% less death-rays.

  292. kg said,

    December 14, 2012 at 19:42

    whoops! meant this one. thats what i get for trying to be tricky with html

    aw fucket

  293. Pryme said,

    December 14, 2012 at 20:02

    Whatever we do, let’s not talk about gun violence.

    But the children need to know that only by packing heat can they truly be safe.

  294. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 14, 2012 at 20:10

    Fenwick, et al., this article was the first time I saw in print what I had come to believe about religion. Of course I didn’t have the developmental psychology data and all that but when I read it I said “THAT’S IT – HE NAILED IT!”

    His book DesCarte’s Baby is a must read for anyone with an interest in religion. I have a few quibbles with some of his conclusions and most certainly with some of his starting perspective but I really do feel he’s got the best explanation for religion.

    For this who can’t be arsed to read that shit, the basic idea is that god is an evolutionary spandrel, an artifact of our ability to reason abstractly. You’d be doing yourself a favor to just fucking read it, k?

  295. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 14, 2012 at 20:12

    It occured to me that all three of you live in Oregon: Pup in Portland … OBS in Corvallis … my brother in Eugene. Is there some sort of Atheist Flouride in the water?

    Probably. Portland is the least religious metropolitan area with greater than 1 million population. Benton County (where Corvallis is) is the least religious county in America.

    OBS & BBBB: Your links at Sadlyburg are inactive.

    Those comments of mine were from my fone, where I hadn’t added the linky bit.

  296. Wayne Lapierre said,

    December 14, 2012 at 20:15

    Merry Christmas Connecticut.

  297. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 14, 2012 at 20:31

    Wayne Lapierre needs to be strapped into a chair and forced to watch the families of those kids tell their stories.

    But that wouldn’t faze him, so he would also be sodomized with an AR15, have an electrified spent .44 cartridge jammed in his pee-hole and be randomly tazed and forced to listen to Justin Bieber and Taylor Swift’s “music”.

    For a start.

  298. Bitter Scribe said,

    December 14, 2012 at 20:36

    I hope all the teachers and the janitor are ashamed of themselves for not packing heat like the NRA says they should.

  299. Every gun nut in America said,

    December 14, 2012 at 20:44

    What a horrible tragedy! Someone is going to criticize us again!

  300. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 14, 2012 at 20:51

    Holy fucking shit – only just reading the news now and it is fucking horrible.

  301. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 14, 2012 at 20:59

    The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of elementary-school students.

  302. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 14, 2012 at 21:02

    At the NoisyWaterTesticle’s twittle feed, there’s this gem from teh Freepers:

    This sort of horror is directly tied to the degraded value of human life through abortion, bureaucrat-run healthcare, easy divorce, pop-cult

    Translated: Quick, everybody talk about anything but guns! ANYTHING!

  303. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 14, 2012 at 21:07

    On a lighter (what wouldn’t be lighter?) note, those of you with upgraded iPreciouses can now get a proper map app again.

  304. Whale Chowder said,

    December 14, 2012 at 21:10

    Fuck fuck fuck fuck. That’s just sickening. I actually want to throw up.

  305. El Manquécito said,

    December 14, 2012 at 21:15

    Really good Sub but it’s a primary school. Blame the msm.

  306. tigris said,

    December 14, 2012 at 21:17

    This sort of horror is directly tied to the degraded value of human life through abortion, bureaucrat-run healthcare, easy divorce, pop-cult

    What do any of those other than the first(and even that’s dependent on accepting their perspective that a fertilized egg is just as valuable as a child – which totally doesn’t degrade the value of actual human life) have to do with life? And what kind of jerk uses the murder of multiple elementary school children to try to push their political view on health care? Holy fuck.

  307. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 14, 2012 at 21:18

    Really good Sub but it’s a primary school.

    Huh? What’s the diff between elementary and primary school? I thought those, and “grade school” were kinda all the same thing…

  308. El Manquécito said,

    December 14, 2012 at 21:19

    For furriners:

    pre-school < K

    K through 4, primary

    5 through 8, elementary

    9 through 12, high

    Y'all with your forms and stuff.

  309. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 14, 2012 at 21:25

    Elementary school is in pretty common usage throughout the US, but different states do different things around terminology and division by year.

  310. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 14, 2012 at 21:27

    I’m sure we can settle our differences by shooting each others kids.

  311. tigris said,

    December 14, 2012 at 21:28

    The name of the place is Sandy Hook Elementary School. I think the elementary vs primary is more a regional thing vs a hard and fast rule; in my town it was elementary 1-5, middle 6-8, high 9-12.

  312. El Manquécito said,

    December 14, 2012 at 21:33

    I’ll take that. Subby’s quote was still excellent.

  313. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 14, 2012 at 21:34

    my town it was elementary 1-5, middle 6-8, high 9-12.

    It’s K-5 for elementry aka primary aka grade school around these parts. That changed about 30 years ago. It was K-6, 7-9 “junior high” 10-12 “high” and 12+ high and drunk.

    Admittedly, I was pretty high most of 10th-12th grade.

  314. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 14, 2012 at 21:38

    I’m sure we can settle our differences by shooting each others kids.

    Well, it is the civilized thing to do after all.

  315. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 14, 2012 at 21:42

    Oh and just to try to make the trifecta of useless crap posts because I’d rather not think any further about how fucking horrible this stupid fucking country and our stupid fucking violent culture and stupid fucking useless rightwing shilling evil moneygrubbing fucking assholes is:

    Around here we also have the “elemiddle” — grade 3-8.

    So there.

  316. El Manquécito said,

    December 14, 2012 at 21:46

    Different school districts maximize the value of their real estate by distributing their classes among buildings and then labeling them. Pedantic minds (casually raises hand) can assume the system they grew up in is definitional.

  317. Helmut Monotreme said,

    December 14, 2012 at 21:51

    Could we have a free health care plan for everyone that includes comprehensive screening, counseling, and treatment for mental health issues?

  318. Another Kiwi said,

    December 14, 2012 at 21:55

    Jesus, the bullshit is already metres thick on this shooting. Apparently the wrong person had their tweets publicised, the presznint doesn’t want to talk “today”, Bryan fisher says this has to mean the end of Gun free zones.
    It’s like a fucking script that gets used again and again until the next fucking time.
    FFS civilised countries, even fucking Australia, do something about this shit when it happens.

  319. kg said,

    December 14, 2012 at 21:57

    my town it was elementary 1-5, middle 6-8, high 9-12.

    same here in IL, ‘cept we sometimes call middle school “junior high”

    Related: We used to be the only state that banned concealed carry.

    http://articles.chicagotribune.com/2012-12-12/news/ct-met-conceal-carry-ruling-20121212_1_gun-control-gun-ordinance-todd-vandermyde

  320. tigris said,

    December 14, 2012 at 22:02

    Could we have a free health care plan for everyone that includes comprehensive screening, counseling, and treatment for mental health issues?

    Apparently that would be too life-devaluing, no matter how many deaths it prevented.

    Bryan fisher says this has to mean the end of Gun free zones.

    What a horrible person he is.

  321. Pryme said,

    December 14, 2012 at 22:04

    It’s like a fucking script that gets used again and again until the next fucking time.

    It’s just to desensitize the public to these occurrences to the point where any shooting anywhere will be met with little more than, “Oh, those poor people…did anyone catch the game last night?”

  322. N__B said,

    December 14, 2012 at 22:15

    My congressman, Jerry Nadler, said more or less the right thing: “I am absolutely horrified by news of the cold-blooded shooting of dozens of children in Newtown, Connecticut. Yet another unstable person has gotten access to firearms and committed an unspeakable crime against innocent children. We cannot simply accept this as a routine product of modern American life. If now is not the time to have a serious discussion about gun control and the epidemic of gun violence plaguing our society, I don’t know when is. How many more Columbines and Newtowns must we live through? I am challenging President Obama, the Congress, and the American public to act on our outrage and, finally, do something about this.”

  323. Major Kong said,

    December 14, 2012 at 22:24

    my town it was elementary 1-5, middle 6-8, high 9-12.

    Where I grew up (Chicago suburbs) it was Elementary 1-6, Junior High (aka “Hell”) 7-8, High School 9-12

  324. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 14, 2012 at 22:24

    Obama statement short – mostly the “thoughts prayers are with the community” stuff. He did acknowledge the spate of recent mass shootings and said something about coming together as a nation for meaningful action to prevent these sorts of tragedies from happening again.

  325. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 14, 2012 at 22:36

    WashPost has a transcript.

  326. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 14, 2012 at 22:44

    From the transcript (thanks DKW):

    As a country, we have been through this too many times. Whether it is an elementary school in Newtown, or a shopping mall in Oregon, or a temple in Wisconsin, or a movie theater in Aurora, or a street corner in Chicago, these neighborhoods are our neighborhoods and these children are our children. And we’re going to have to come together and take meaningful action to prevent more tragedies like this, regardless of the politics.

    [wingnut] WHY IS TEH PREZNIT POLITISIZING THIS TRAJEDY!!!?!?! IMMA GO BUY MOAR AMMO! [/wingnut]

  327. gocart mozart said,

    December 14, 2012 at 22:47

    Here is the killer’s Facebook page.
    http://www.facebook.com/ryan.lanza.96#!/brad.jockjennings?fref=ts

  328. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 14, 2012 at 22:50

    Unlikely.

    Ryan Lanza
    35 minutes ago

  329. tigris said,

    December 14, 2012 at 22:57

    I’ve already seen a dumbass on FB bring up the knifings in China and how they prove guns aren’t really the issue, the issue is “evil.” The death toll of multiple knifings over several years is lower than the one shooting, but I suppose that’s no reason to make it harder for those people to get guns.

  330. Whale Chowder said,

    December 14, 2012 at 22:59

    Could we have a free health care plan for everyone that includes comprehensive screening, counseling, and treatment for mental health issues?

    No because FREEDOM!

  331. Whale Chowder said,

    December 14, 2012 at 23:01

    I’ve already seen a dumbass on FB bring up the knifings in China and how they prove guns aren’t really the issue, the issue is “evil.”

    Me too. Clearly there is NO DIFFERENCE between firing hundreds of rounds at children and killing three people with a knife.

    But of course NOW isn’t the time to discuss changing gun laws.

  332. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    December 14, 2012 at 23:06

    “When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, “Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.” To this day, especially in times of “disaster,” I remember my mother’s words and I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers –so many caring people in this world.” – Mr. Rogers

  333. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    December 14, 2012 at 23:11

    I can’t stop cryong.

  334. Bitter Scribe said,

    December 14, 2012 at 23:11

    I feel like trolling right-wing sites and dropping Sub’s “Tree of Liberty” quote in comments just to stir shit up. The only thing holding me back is fear of plagiarism.

  335. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    December 14, 2012 at 23:16

    FY fone.

  336. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 14, 2012 at 23:17

    I’ve already seen a dumbass on FB bring up the knifings in China and how they prove guns aren’t really the issue, the issue is “evil.”

    I guess that dumbass didn’t pray hard enough.

  337. Pupienus said,

    December 14, 2012 at 23:27

    Bryan fisher says this has to mean the end of Gun free zones.

    What, he didn’t blame the gays? Wait … okay, tomorrow he’s going to follow it up with how the radical homosexual agenda, because they’re all such fucking sissies, created the gun-free zones to feminize THE CHILDREN! and that’s why THE CHILDREN didn’t whip out their Uzis to shred the shooter to bits.

  338. Helmut Monotreme said,

    December 14, 2012 at 23:31

    Clearly if we had a better class of children with titanium skin and laser eyes, with razor teeth for rending the flesh of evildoers and claws for hands they could have swarmed him like piranhas and this demented shooter wouldn’t have stood a chance.

  339. wiley said,

    December 14, 2012 at 23:52

    Guess it’s not a good time to make jokes about long breasts.

    I attribute mass murder to hyper-masculinity. What mass murders have most in common is not the weapon(s) used, but the sex of the offender. Going commando against a bunch of elementary school children may not seem particularly masculine, but he did have the power of life and death over them which is apparently the power he felt entitled to.

  340. VCarlson said,

    December 14, 2012 at 23:53

    When I followed Pryme’s link, the latest comment was this:

    What america needs is CHRIST in the white house where the founding fathers wrote the constitution and established the LordShip of JEsuS CHRIST. Too many abominations
    Jamiyl, 4 secs ago

    I would like to believe it’s some card inappropriately channeling wingnut, but I’m very much afraid “Jamiyl” is serious. And seriously misinformed.

  341. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 15, 2012 at 0:07

    I attribute mass murder to hyper-masculinity.

    I dunno if it’s all that hyper.

  342. Another Kiwi said,

    December 15, 2012 at 0:56

    have most in common is not the weapon(s) used, but the sex of the offender
    This. It is one of the few common factors in school shooting incidents. I think that it should be stressed to boys that shooting up a classroom of schoolkids is not masculinity. It is, in fact, sub human.

  343. CRA said,

    December 15, 2012 at 1:01

    Thanks, Fenwick, I appreciate it.

    Fenwick, et al., this article was the first time I saw in print what I had come to believe about religion. Of course I didn’t have the developmental psychology data and all that but when I read it I said “THAT’S IT – HE NAILED IT!”

    His book DesCarte’s Baby is a must read for anyone with an interest in religion. I have a few quibbles with some of his conclusions and most certainly with some of his starting perspective but I really do feel he’s got the best explanation for religion.

    For this who can’t be arsed to read that shit, the basic idea is that god is an evolutionary spandrel, an artifact of our ability to reason abstractly. You’d be doing yourself a favor to just fucking read it, k?

    Oh I definitely want to read that, from the sound of it.

  344. tigris said,

    December 15, 2012 at 1:09

    So Glenn Beck tweeted “It is not the gun. It is the soul.” Yeah, because a guy took a combat soul into a kindergarten class and shot 100 rounds of soul into kids while wearing a soul-proof vest.

  345. tigris said,

    December 15, 2012 at 1:23

    Bryan Fischer AND Mike Huckabee claim school shooting occur because God is no longer welcome in schools, so the poor dear is powerless to protect children. Because no shooting has ever occurred at a religious school or when school prayer was common.

  346. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 15, 2012 at 1:35

    What america needs is CHRIST in the white house where the founding fathers wrote the constitution and established the LordShip of JEsuS CHRIST. Too many abominations
    Jamiyl, 4 secs ago

    Ah, that would account for the many and frequent references to Jesus and God in the Constitution. Thing is, my copy doesn’t seem to have “Jesus” or “God” in it anywhere. I have read it many times so I can confidently state the only reference to religion at all is in the first amendment. That bit where that says “Congref shall make no law respecting the establishment of religion.”

    Fuck, every fucking time a Xian supremacist says anything about the Constitution it is clear they have never read it. Just like the bible, which most of us militant atheists anti-theists have read but they have not.

  347. VCarlson said,

    December 15, 2012 at 1:37

    Because no shooting has ever occurred at a religious school or when school prayer was common.

    Yeah, those kids at the West Nickel Mines school were totally asking for it by being Amish pacifists, which made it all their fault for not being armed. Mike Huckabee is indescribably disgusting.

  348. VCarlson said,

    December 15, 2012 at 1:43

    Ah, that would account for the many and frequent references to Jesus and God in the Constitution

    Not to mention “The White House” didn’t even exist as a structure, far less be known by that name, until well after the Constitution was written and ratified.

    I’ve not yet been able to make it through the Bible, as I like to start at the beginning and read through to the end, which means wading through the Old Testament in all its nastiness. It just reeks.

  349. wiley said,

    December 15, 2012 at 1:58

    Giving psychiatrists more opportunities to label anyone who is unhappy or weird or traumatized with a diagnostic label that will allow a judge to take away their rights, force medication, and stigmatize that person for life won’t do a fucking thing to lower the incidence of mass shootings. In fact, it could inspire more. Take a troubled man, label him with a mental illness, limit his options, bully him with the overbearing “scientific” arrogance that is particular to the domain of psychiatry and watch him become angry, violent, and bitter.

    Please look into this before concluding that someone who commits mass murder must be identifiable by a diagnosis. Most schizophrenics are no threat to people in general, much less people with other diagnoses. As a matter of fact, most sociopaths aren’t mass murderers.

    When a mass murder occurs, it receives instant and pervasive news coverage. Unfortunately, we are prone to overestimate the frequency of an event by its prominence in our minds, and mass murder is no exception. This is a very rare phenomenon and is neither increasing nor decreasing in the US. Since 1976 there have been about 20 mass murders a year. 2003 was the most violent year for mass murder, with 30 incidents and 135 victims. Virginia Tech, Fort Hood, Edmund Oklahoma, and San Ysidro still resonate in the public consciousness, however, reminding us that these events do happen. A positive counterpoint is that rates of all violent crime have significantly decreased over this same time period, from 48 victims per 1000 persons in 1976 to 15 victims in 2010. The most lethal school mass murder in US history was in Bath, Michigan, in 1927, a bombing that resulted in 45 deaths, mostly children in the second to sixth grades.

    http://blog.oup.com/2012/09/seven-myths-of-mass-murder/

  350. Suezboo said,

    December 15, 2012 at 2:13

    This is so horrible, yet again. My condolences.

    For some reason – excess of crazies, availability of firearms ? – this crime seems peculiarly American. I can’t remember when we had one. Our crazies seem to stick to family murders, wiping out their wives and children, then offing themselves. There are plenty of guns around but they tend to be used for political hits, armed robberies and hijackings, gang stuff and the infamous taxi wars. AK 47s mostly, left over from the anti-apartheid struggle.

    Whatev, the picture of those poor kids is nightmarish and will haunt the survivors for a long time.

  351. bughunter, parent of an elementary student, said,

    December 15, 2012 at 2:31

    I cried.

  352. Nym said,

    December 15, 2012 at 2:48

    The phrase “Bryan Fischer is a shit golem” keeps going through my mind.

    Googlebomb, anybody?

  353. Smut Clyde said,

    December 15, 2012 at 2:56

    Please look into this before concluding that someone who commits mass murder must be identifiable by a diagnosis.

    What Wiley said. When there is a thriving market in weapons specifically designed for killing lots of people in a short time, when you have the industry and its lobbyists and its affiliated political movement encouraging the purchase of weapons and ammunition, then it seems odd to label the people who buy and use the weapons according to directions as “disturbed”. It’s a form of disturbance that is in tune with your society

  354. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    December 15, 2012 at 3:19

    Smutty has a disturbing bit of a point.

    Also, evidently my killfile is borked, because I can see the stupid troll’s stupid fucking comment. Must fix that immediately.

  355. paleotectonics said,

    December 15, 2012 at 3:22

    The phrase “Bryan Fischer is a shit golem” keeps going through my mind.

    Please allow me to make a new rule for the world.

    ANYONE. (Yes, Mr. Huckabee, Mr. Fischer, all these other nutjobs). Who has made the statement that God has decided that 20 children needed to be slaughtered because God is all angerface that his kid wasn’t included in the yearbook photos, IS A SOCIOPATH.

    You have left the building, so shut up before you wake the neighbors.

    PISS OFF.

    You are not welcome here.

  356. Dennis said,

    December 15, 2012 at 3:38

    I care about that Bryan Fischer says how Jesus loves the little children.

  357. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    December 15, 2012 at 3:53

    Fuck you.
    Jesus is dead.
    They killed him, and didn’t need a firearm.
    I had to get drunk to stop crying, and maybe sleep tonight.

  358. Smut Clyde said,

    December 15, 2012 at 4:25

    Why do you care what Bryan Fischer said? He doesn’t affect gun control or it’s legislation.

    Bryan Fischer has no input to the US political system? Perhaps someone should inform the press so they can stop bothering to report when he endorses particular candidates or, as in this case, lobbies against gun control.

  359. Smut Clyde said,

    December 15, 2012 at 4:31

    Please look into this before concluding that someone who commits mass murder must be identifiable by a diagnosis.

    Thought #1: It would be nice if there were a psychological test that could distinguish those people who are willing to point guns at strangers or friends and shoot bullets through them. So far, alas, such a test has eluded both the discipline of psychology, and the recruitment agencies for the US armed forces.

    Thought #2: Do you really want a situation where your constitutional rights are contingent on an assessment from a forensic psychiatrist, such as e.g. Mrs Dr Professor Reynolds?

  360. VCarlson said,

    December 15, 2012 at 4:54

    Face it. Anytime someone embarks on a “killing spree,” whether said spree results in many dead or few, it will be found that that person had psychological problems. “Normal,” “well-adjusted” people don’t try to solve their problems by killing other people. That said, the vast majority of people with mental or psychological problems (of which there’s a pretty high number in my immediate family) also don’t try to solve their problems by killing other people. You can’t tell ahead of time which seemingly “normal” or obviously disturbed person might go out and kill people. That said, I think it would be a very bad idea to let my nonviolent but seriously schizophrenic stepbrother have a firearm.

  361. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 5:00

    Fuck fuck fuck fuck. That’s just sickening. I actually want to throw up.

    i have been weepy since ive heard about this…there’s been something like 61 mass shootings in the past 30 years…this one makes the 12 th for this year alone…the trend is that the guns are obtained legally…what does this tell us boys and girls?

  362. Major Kong said,

    December 15, 2012 at 5:02

    Note to anyone contemplating a mass shooting spree or murder/suicide:

    You need to be sure that your gun works properly, so please test it on yourself first.

    This has been a public service announcement.

  363. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 15, 2012 at 5:15

    There’s nowhere to hide, tonight, it would seem.
    .

  364. Major Kong said,

    December 15, 2012 at 5:15

    Sadly, no.

  365. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 15, 2012 at 5:16

    More’s the reason to drink ALL the beer, tonight.
    .

  366. Major Kong said,

    December 15, 2012 at 5:18

    The cat’s been following me around since I got home this morning. If she’s not careful I might get the impression that she missed me.

  367. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 15, 2012 at 5:19

    The cat’s been following me around since I got home this morning. If she’s not careful I might get the impression that she missed me.

    Mine do that every evening. They really do think I hung the moon.
    .

  368. CRA said,

    December 15, 2012 at 5:21

    I’m glad to see variants of “saying you can’t politicize a tragedy is in itself a form of politicizing it.” …

    In a century or two, science may well view our psychiatrists etc. as little better than witch doctors. They shouldn’t exercise much power at all. They should try to do good, cautiously, and devote the rest of their efforts to the advancement of knowledge, for a long time.

    I’d much rather have a society with strict gun control laws than a society that does rigorous psychological profiling of its citizenry often enough to predict some incidents of mass violence. The former has been done, and contra wingnuts, it’s not that bad. I’d say the latter has never been done, but that’d be misleading in that it’d just be a variant police state.

    In theory it might be possible to socially engineer a heavily-armed society that would simultaneously be among the very safest. The American Right has no plans to move in that direction, however. Nothing they do or say indicates an interest in a less violent society. They are more serious about improving public education, or reducing teen pregnancy, if you get my drift.

  369. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 15, 2012 at 5:25

    In theory it might be possible to socially engineer a heavily-armed society that would simultaneously be among the very safest.

    Only between the covers of a Robert A. Heinlein novel.
    .

  370. Major Kong said,

    December 15, 2012 at 5:26

    I actually own quite a few guns. I’ve never had the urge to go wandering around in public with one.

    And I dare say, having actually been in some scary shit, that I’d probably be better capable than most of these yahoos to be trusted with one.

    So if I don’t even trust myself to carry concealed, I really don’t trust the average NRA member to.

  371. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 15, 2012 at 5:43

    Major, we all indirectly trusted you to carry nuclear weapons, should the need arise.

    I would not be uncomfortable with you packing heat.
    .

  372. CRA said,

    December 15, 2012 at 5:46

    Only between the covers of a Robert A. Heinlein novel.

    I’m not suggesting we try, and I won’t bother imagining how one would work, since I’m not proposing a heavily-armed-yet-peaceful society. Some people profess to be interested in one, so the conceptual work is on them. That, or they should stop claiming that their ideal world would be safer. Let them just admit that they’re pining after an anarchic fantasy.

  373. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 15, 2012 at 5:52

    I’m not suggesting we try, and I won’t bother imagining how one would work, since I’m not proposing a heavily-armed-yet-peaceful society.

    Of course, and I understood that. I am regularly around people who are armed (cops), and have very little trepidation in their presence, even though ironically, the only persons to have ever pointed a gun at me were in fact, cops.
    .

  374. Helen said,

    December 15, 2012 at 5:58

    This shit is not gonna change. Here’s the thing. I love this blog and the people here. HI FENWICK REMEMBER ME, DARLING, WHEN I TOLD YOU I LOVE YOU AND YOU GUESSED THAT I WAS “TIPPLING” YAY good times.?

    Anyway, things are not going to change. The left has lost this fight. The number of dead children does not matter. The surviving victims are not going to change. Please indulge me with a personal story.

    Two years ago this coming January, my beloved nephew Alex was gunned down by his “friend” Tommy. He was killed in a small town in western VA. My father and I here in NYC, liberals to the core, were devastated. We drove 8 hours down for the funeral. The whole time I tried to convince my father, who has buried his wife, his son, (those to other death causes) and now his grandson, to not bring up guns. And if someone happened to bring it up to not say anything. I said “Daddy, please if it comes up and you feel as though you cannot contain yourself, please walk out of the room.”

    Well, friends, it turns out that was not an issue. It never, ever, ever came up. It never occurred to those fucking hillbillies that guns were the problem.

    Tonight my sister posted on her FB page “Let’s pray for those in Sandy Hook.” I love my sister. I do not like her but I love her. It took all my strength not to post “Pray? We’re too late to pray. Those babies are dead. Your God clearly did not give a shit. What we should pray for is death to all liberals. They are taking our guns away. If those babies had guns in their lunch boxes this would have never happened.”
    Of course I did not post it. I love my sister. I just do not like her.

  375. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 6:00

    In a century or two, science may well view our psychiatrists etc. as little better than witch doctors. They shouldn’t exercise much power at all. They should try to do good, cautiously, and devote the rest of their efforts to the advancement of knowledge, for a long time.

    driving to the cities tonight I was pondering on how civilization has advanced in so many ways, but we are still failing I predicting or preventing evil like this…obviously evil has always been with us but we are still no further in understanding it…

  376. CRA said,

    December 15, 2012 at 6:04

    I, for my part, suspected you understood … I just wanted to type more about my theme. (The nation’s gun culture talks about safety, but it’s obviously not a serious concern of theirs.)

    I’ve only had a shotgun pointed at me by a soon-to-be-ex-girlfriend’s father, when I was young and had broken into their house. He was behaving sensibly, and he didn’t scare me by doing it.

    Ah well I should play a game or something. I listened to some free jazz that sortof captured my earlier mood-disturbances but I can’t go on like that all night.

  377. jim x / another jim said,

    December 15, 2012 at 6:07

    May I suggest the phrase “Queersling”?

  378. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 6:09

    I would not be uncomfortable with you packing heat.

    dit to the toe…

    also too…helen, dog love ya, you once again shown more restraint than me…sad sad sad about your nephew, not surprised about the hillbillies, and simpatico on the sister thing…good to hear from you…when we going to ireland?

  379. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 15, 2012 at 6:16

    I listened to this.
    .

  380. Helen said,

    December 15, 2012 at 6:17

    hey bbfk the plan is 8 yrs form now. But if, say, Jeb gets in next. I can do 4. Wanna join me?

  381. Spearhafoc, who waits dreaming in his house at R'lyeh said,

    December 15, 2012 at 6:18

    This sort of horror is directly tied to the degraded value of human life through abortion, bureaucrat-run healthcare, easy divorce, pop-cult

    All hail Pepsi!

  382. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 6:28

    hey bbfk the plan is 8 yrs form now. But if, say, Jeb gets in next. I can do 4. Wanna join me?

    oh, sister, I am so there!

    feck…i was just on facebook and holyfuckingshitgoddammit, thank bog the ipad is continually refreshing, because if I could post at all, i would mightily offend family and acquaintances alike…although if my ifucking device ever quits reloading, imma post helen’s comment if’n she don’t mind…

  383. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 6:35

    really…wtf with the multiple tag fails?!?

  384. N__B said,

    December 15, 2012 at 7:04

    wtf with the multiple tag fails?!?

    You have abandoned god and, petty fucker that he is supposed to be, he’s tag failing your ass.

  385. Switzerland said,

    December 15, 2012 at 7:04

    In theory it might be possible to socially engineer a heavily-armed society that would simultaneously be among the very safest.

    Only between the covers of a Robert A. Heinlein novel.

    *cough*

  386. The NRA said,

    December 15, 2012 at 7:06

    We all pray that this senseless tragedy can soon become nothing more than a fading memory.

    By which we mean the NHL strike.

  387. John Revolta said,

    December 15, 2012 at 7:19

    This is a very rare phenomenon and is neither increasing nor decreasing in the US. Since 1976 there have been about 20 mass murders a year.

    So, once every 18 days?

    For 36 years?

    Yeah, that’s what I would call very very rare indeed.

    Fuck.

  388. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 7:21

    You have abandoned god and, petty fucker that he is supposed to be, he’s tag failing your ass.

    feck…i knew i should have thrown a touchdown instead…

  389. N__B said,

    December 15, 2012 at 7:24

    Throwing a tag fail.

  390. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 7:26

    srsly? how can i not work my fecking iPad? maybe it’s the whiskey…

  391. CRA said,

    December 15, 2012 at 7:27

    Now, now, Switzerland, you know that American wingnuts are not gonna move an inch in your direction, unless maybe the bosses want to, say, reform banking. Certainly not for the sake of a more peaceful society. They will not learn. They are clear on that point. They have nothing to learn from anyone, and especially not you. Heavily armed, my ass (-load of shells, keistered on account of Obama’s recent re-”election”).

  392. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 7:28

    gah…i m being subjected to jay leno….

  393. Helen said,

    December 15, 2012 at 7:31

    The whiskey? What kinda whiskey? Bushmills, right?

  394. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 7:37

    hubbkf and i have been arguing about guns…he’s pretty much as liberal as I am on everything, but he’s a diehard hunter as well…which I’m not against, and I have not been able to form a lucid argument for totally banning guns…

  395. Helen said,

    December 15, 2012 at 7:44

    Alex’s friend said “Hey let’s go hunting” And as Alex got out of the var he was shot. With a hunting gun.

  396. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 7:46

    The whiskey? What kinda whiskey? Bushmills, right?

    sadly I don’t have the bush mills right now, but we’re gonna buy some before we leave the cities this weekend…can’t get our local liquor store to stock it..also too, lately we’ve been on this stuff…

  397. Helen said,

    December 15, 2012 at 7:48

    Well at least it’s Irish

  398. VCarlson said,

    December 15, 2012 at 7:49

    I’m in favor of laws seriously restricting private ownership of firearms designed to kill humans en masse, and things like high capacity magazines. As for hunting, and other firearms I deem worthy, something like driver’s licenses should be in effect: regular requirements to renew, passing tests of knowledge and facility to get one in the first place, vision tests to renew, also periodic tests of knowledge and facility (which I think should be done for drivers, too).

    And a magic pony.

  399. VCarlson said,

    December 15, 2012 at 7:56

    For my brother’s 21st birthday, I gave him a bottle of Macallan Scots whiskey distilled the year he was born and aged in the barrel 18 years. I’m very much afraid his roomies drank it up at the end of a drunken evening, when they might as well have been drinking rotgut. I’m still a little bitter.

  400. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 8:08

    jesus, helen, that’s awful…we are so fricking alike on gun control…why cant we can’t we make everyone else see it?!?

  401. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 8:14

    I’m still a little bitter.
    as you should be…

  402. kg said,

    December 15, 2012 at 8:50

    Thom Hartmann is good.

  403. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    December 15, 2012 at 10:52

    hubbkf and i have been arguing about guns…he’s pretty much as liberal as I am on everything, but he’s a diehard hunter as well…which I’m not against, and I have not been able to form a lucid argument for totally banning guns…

    Make so-called Second Amendment champions adhere to the actual Second Amendment, rather than their bullshit one which ignores the first clause:

    A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.

    You want to own a gun? Sign up for a well-regulated militia administered by the local elected authorities, not some Turner Diaries LARP bullshit militia. Sign up, show up for a monthly or quarterly muster in which you receive training and safety evaluations. No militia service? No guns.

    That’s a genuine “Second Amendment” solution, not a wingnut shithead Sharron Angle Second Amendment solution.

  404. smut clyde said,

    December 15, 2012 at 10:57

    “Normal,” “well-adjusted” people don’t try to solve their problems by killing other people.

    I confess, I have only limited experience either of sanity or of killing people.

  405. Fenwick said,

    December 15, 2012 at 13:29

    My younger brother–and only blood sibling–is a veteran ‘Middle School’ teacher in Albuquerque; and, equivalent to ‘Elementary’ with El Manq’s grade ranges. To me, however, the NM version is clearer–and more descriptive–terminology:

    (Pre-School)
    Primary School
    Middle School
    High School

    Moreover, ‘Middle School’ suggests that kids are making important personal and social transitions.

    Anyway, I like the terminology NM uses.

    Back when dinosaurs roamed the earth, the terminology was thus in IN, NY, & KS:

    (Kindergarten) [Preschool]
    Grade School [Primary]
    Junior High School [Elementary / Middle]
    High School

    ————————————–
    I went into this detail about terminology, because I can scarely write about the Massacre. Devastated, shocked, over-whelmed by grief for the dead and grief for the survivors (in the broad sense). I am profoundly saddened.

    And over-whelmed by anger and rage. I’m sure my views on the viciousness of the most dogmatic and unhinged fundies; and, on the NRA, their media shills, astroturf manipulation, and elected puppets. I also imagine my long-held and deeply-entrenched beliefs about gun regulation and enforcement are in-sync with most Sadlies.

    I have not yet begun to read the Massacre comments here. I am sure other Sadlies have been far more eloquent than I can be, especially in the freshness of the moment. So I’ll simply extend my appreciation to all.

    Pryme: Special thanks for the SN link; provided my first knowledge of the Massacre.

    ((My SN bookmark is in my ‘News’ folder, btw))

    Because of the Massacre and my present state of mind, I may slip back into the shadows for a while….

  406. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 15, 2012 at 13:47

    re: hunting and gun control

    We limit hunters. They need licenses, they are constrained by seasonal limits, tags and bag limits, &c. If their firearm is only used for hunting, why do they need to store it at home? You sign out your hunting firearm (read not a handgun nor an assault weapon) from the range a day or two before your hunt and return it promptly afterwards. Keeps your gun safely out of the hands

  407. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 15, 2012 at 13:49

    FY iPhone!

    Out of the hands of your kids and the friends they brought home from school.

  408. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 15, 2012 at 13:57

    Hunters accept and even embrace restrictions on hunting if there’s a sensible reason for them. Wildlife management and conservation is something they generally understand. If your firearm is solely for the purpose of hunting then having to keep it in a designated location that can be secured properly is not an undue hardship to keep deadly weapons out of general circulation.

    Also I would make “not reporting a lost or stolen firearm” a felony.

  409. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 15, 2012 at 14:03

    Also a point on the whole “make guns illegal and only criminals will have them” argument – fucking exactly right. That guy with the semi auto? Just broke the law – toss him jail. Simple really.

  410. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 15:11

    If your firearm is solely for the purpose of hunting then having to keep it in a designated location that can be secured properly is not an undue hardship to keep deadly weapons out of general circulation.

    well, that’s not what it’s really about though…i think to some extent and there is a penis/firearm/some other substitute at play…whether its compensation or more inherent, guns represent something, whether they want to admit it or not…

    i’ve been awake since about 4:30 a.m. (not sadly time) forming cutting and inciteful fb posts…the politicization and MOAR GUNS rhetoric that was rampant on there yesterday is causing me genuine pain and torment…i’m feeling a bit helen-ish here as some of these dipshitdiots are family, but jesus christ: how unfeeling or maladjusted are you when your response to yet another mass shooting (and the most heinous one for a couple of reasons) is ‘gee, sorry bout your kid…but MOAR GUNS!!111!!”? i just feel the more reasoned argument needs to be made…

  411. Fenwick said,

    December 15, 2012 at 15:13

    Hi, Helen! Sure I remember you, darlin’! I enjoyed our conversation.

    I’m so sorry to hear about Alex. I gather the friend who invited him to hunt, accidentally shot him. If. so, I can scarely imagine the friend’s horror in the moment, and piercing grief. Even moreso, if Alex died before help arrived. It is tragic. (I don’t want to open wounds, but if you willing, I’m curious: how old was Alex? How long had he been a hunter? His friend? Did medical help arrive before he died? Were there only two of them?)

    And that’s another thing that occurs to me:

    Each school or church massacre–must send wide waves of special pain and grief to other communities that have also suffered mass killings, and opening so many wounds in so many people. And such events must also bring pain to hundreds of thousands of families and friends who have borne firearms deaths–such as Alex’s–from any causes, opening old wounds and heartache again.

    I would like converse more, darlin’. But for my own mental health, I’ve got to pull back from the Massacre and Death. The Holday Season has always especially difficult for me; I am more vulnerable to depression. I’m not handling Connecticut very well.

    I love you too. Here’s a big consoling hug.

  412. Fenwick said,

    December 15, 2012 at 15:25

    Before I slip off into the shadows…

    bbfk: As you know, I think your tag-fails are absolutely charming. I dunno why exactly. I suspect it has something to do with your eagerness and enthusiasm. Anyway, you have been Epic so far! I’m a gonna bookmark the thread…..

  413. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 15, 2012 at 15:26

    bbkf,

    Absolutely. And that is why when hunters argue against gun control you can tell them they are full of shit. Their issues with gun control are not rooted in their love of their sport, but primarily in their fundamental lack of self worth, so crippling that even with the abnormal aberrancy of US gun violence they need to cling to their PENIS surrogates.

    Or you could just ask “do much hunting at home? Is it really such a hardship to get your rifle from the range before a hunting trip that you’re fine with nutjobs being able to collect arsenals for theirmass murder sprees?”

  414. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 15:46

    right? there’s something more at play and i wish they would just cut the bullshit….anyway, required reading

  415. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 15:48

    I suspect it has something to do with your eagerness and enthusiasm. Anyway, you have been Epic

    haha..in this case it was whiskey + stupid ipad keyboard + special eyes = epic tagfail…

  416. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 15, 2012 at 16:21

    Not sure I know how to function, today. Maybe some eggy burritos from McDonald’s, and then spend the day drinking Busch.
    .

  417. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 16:27

    well, i’ve started…some dipshitdiot posted the following inanity:

    dear god,

    why do you allow such violence in schools? signed, a concerned student

    dear concerned student,

    i’m not allowed in schools
    signed, god

    THIS SHOULD BE SAID OVER AND OVER AGAIN!

    to wit i answered:
    ‘god’ not being in schools is what’s causing the problem? so, he’s bowing to man made rules? if we ‘allowed’ god in schools, he would put up some sort of force field of protection? if god is everywhere as most christians believe, then why is there gun violence everywhere? not being a smart ass here, but really, these kinds of posts raise questions for me…and i might point out, don’t christians carry god in their hearts, so therefore he would be in schools?

  418. Fenwick said,

    December 15, 2012 at 16:27

    The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said at 23:06

    “When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, “Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.” To this day, especially in times of “disaster,” I remember my mother’s words and I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers –so many caring people in this world.” – Mr. Rogers

    The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said at 23:11

    I can’t stop cryong.

    I’m going to send Fred Rogers’s comforting wisdom and practical help to all my friends and family with children. (And to my brother the MS teacher in NM.) It has also helped me, providing another frame, another perspective, some light to help push back the Darkness.

    So you are one of the helpers today…even if Upper Astroboffin is nowhere near Newtown.

  419. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 16:29

    Not sure I know how to function, today. Maybe some eggy burritos from McDonald’s, and then spend the day drinking Busch.

    jesus, jeffraham! why do you hate your innards so much? why don’t you just throw some hotpockets in there too…btw, will you be wearing your bathrobe while this all takes place?

  420. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 16:31

    “When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, “Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.” To this day, especially in times of “disaster,” I remember my mother’s words and I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers –so many caring people in this world.” – Mr. Rogers

    you know what’s weird? when i first read this, i thought she was talking about those who were the helpers of evil and i was like, wtf? what does that sort of interpretation say about me?!@?!

  421. Fenwick said,

    December 15, 2012 at 16:35

    bbfk: Brilliant.

  422. Fenwick said,

    December 15, 2012 at 16:37

    bbfk: You reply to the god-botherer. Brilliant.

  423. Fenwick said,

    December 15, 2012 at 16:39

    what does that sort of interpretation say about me?!@?!

    That you’ve been drinking?

  424. The Mayor of Upper Astroboffin said,

    December 15, 2012 at 16:42

    Thank you Fenwick.

  425. paleotectonics said,

    December 15, 2012 at 16:50

    Not sure I know how to function, today

    I have to function, at work, and a lot going on. But, my teammate is a gun fetishist, and the moment he opens his yap about how he’s gonna train his 5 year old to shoot (and he will, both – open his yap and take his 5 year old shooting, fucking nutcake), I will determine how much willpower I have and how likely I am to keep my job, ‘cuz I’m pretty tsammy this morning.

    I am still sick to my stomach, but have no connection to the event, so I cannot imagine how the families and survivors feel. I need to do something for them. Help?

  426. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 15, 2012 at 16:56

    will you be wearing your bathrobe while this all takes place?

    Of course not! I don’t own a bathrobe.
    .

  427. Major Kong said,

    December 15, 2012 at 16:59

    dear god,

    why do you allow such violence in schools? signed, a concerned student

    They make God sound like Kim Jong Il. What? No life-sized poster of me in the classroom? Then off to the gulag with you!

  428. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 17:03

    oh my…god botherer first posted, ‘sorry, sally…not going to have this debate with you on facebook!’ then he deleted the entire post…hmmm….

  429. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 17:13

    oho! now god botherer’s fb status is ‘i’m tired of facebook opinions :(‘

    oh, waah, waah…somebody called bullshit on your bullshit…

  430. paleotectonics said,

    December 15, 2012 at 17:15

    Not sure I know how to function, today

    Don’t let ‘em off the hook that easy. Ask on their public wall why they are tired of opinions.

  431. tigris said,

    December 15, 2012 at 17:15

    What a fucking coward. HE started it but if anyone responds without the high-fives and attaboys he expected for his hateful bullshit THEY’RE the unreasonable one.

  432. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 17:18

    Of course not! I don’t own a bathrobe.

    well then how does its tie fall in your toilet bowl?

  433. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 17:22

    What a fucking coward. HE started it but if anyone responds without the high-fives and attaboys he expected for his hateful bullshit THEY’RE the unreasonable one.

    now somebody equally lame posted, ‘oh, shoot! and i was just going to write ‘in my opinion you’re awesome!’” bleh….

  434. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 15, 2012 at 17:28

    Don’t let ‘em off the hook that easy. Ask on their public wall why they are tired of opinions.

    I cannot. I haz no facebooger, and I must scream.
    .

  435. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 17:30

    this is what i just posted:

    for the record, i wasn’t stating an opinion, i was truly asking questions…i struggle everyday with questions like that…i don’t want a debate…just anwers to some questions i have…one of them is the whole do we all have a pre-ordained moment when it’s our ‘time’ to go? if so, nothing that we do here on earth can change that…should we try to change it? is the pre-ordained thing real? and do we need verbal and physical reminders of god in our school? and since, like it or not, our students are of multiple faiths and religions, we can’t just choose one god to put out there…then we get into the whole state religion thing…and if we give all ‘gods’ equal time in schools, then there wouldn’t be enough time to focus on school work…

  436. Major Kong said,

    December 15, 2012 at 17:35

    George Carlin on the concept of “God’s Plan”

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n2kZ0lRW9Ls

  437. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 17:59

    hmmm…no reaction…they must be turning the other cheek…oh, i wish i were as good a person…anyhoo, since it’s christmas, here’s a gift for y’all…

  438. bbkf said,

    December 15, 2012 at 18:08

    heh…i am baking a couple of cakes for hubbkf’s family xmas…i just recalled that last night i referred to them as chocolate peckermint pope cake and decided that since i was making two of them, i would shape one like a pecker and one like a big pope hat…but since they are so similar in shape, i might skip that part…we’ll be lucky if i even get them basically made…

  439. Fenwick said,

    December 15, 2012 at 18:35

    bbfk: Sounds delish! The icing could be fan-tastic. (I’m sure Pup up will supply visual refs.) Perhaps fun-with-whipcream serving opportunities? Serving suggestion. Do not use a cake knife on the Pecker cake; instead us a nasty-locking butcher knife labeled “Bobbitt.” Hoots of Xmas Time laffter for all!

  440. Fenwick said,

    December 15, 2012 at 18:36

    looking locking what’s the diff?

  441. Fenwick said,

    December 15, 2012 at 18:37

    Also ‘use’. Also time for me to hang it up and hit the rack.

  442. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 15, 2012 at 18:39

    most sociopaths aren’t mass murderers.

    REPRESENT!

  443. Fenwick said,

    December 15, 2012 at 18:40

    I cannot. I haz no facebooger

    Me either, Jeffraham. I detest ‘social media’.

  444. Fenwick said,

    December 15, 2012 at 18:42

    Pup: Before I pull the plug entirely, thanx for the Atlantic Article. Mos def gonna bundle that off the my brother in Eugene.

    Good night, y’ll

  445. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 15, 2012 at 18:45

    Yesterday I was introduced to Redbreast 12 year old Irish whisky. <Madeline Kahn voice>Sweeeeeet mystery of life at last I found you….

  446. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 15, 2012 at 18:49

    Wont be arsed to do a poll but I suspect that my favorite place on the interboobs (that being here) has the highest percentage of people who, like me, do not have a Facehugger account.

  447. Major Kong said,

    December 15, 2012 at 19:01

    i just recalled that last night i referred to them as chocolate peckermint pope cake

    Are they made from real popes?

  448. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 15, 2012 at 19:06

    Genuine chocolate peckermint popes!

  449. Major Kong said,

    December 15, 2012 at 19:37

    They’re pope-a-licious!

  450. The NRA said,

    December 15, 2012 at 20:12

    Not sure I know how to function, today. Maybe some eggy burritos from McDonald’s, and then spend the day drinking Busch.

    *want to mock, but mockblocked by the dark shame of illicit chimichanga romance*

  451. jim the heretical anti-cliff lemming said,

    December 15, 2012 at 20:16

    I was the NRA … but then I got better..

  452. Another Kiwi said,

    December 15, 2012 at 21:00

    Hey! I is on Faceplace! 1) I can play Scrabb

  453. Another Kiwi said,

    December 15, 2012 at 21:02

    le with Mrs kiwi and 2) I can read Dr. Kenneth Noisewaters “Solutions for Modern Day Problems (you know, down there).
    Also there is a Spitfire page

  454. N__B said,

    December 15, 2012 at 21:05

    Scrabbling the kiwi.

  455. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 15, 2012 at 21:12

    Is scrabbling like braising?

  456. tigris said,

    December 15, 2012 at 21:19

    Love.

  457. smut clyde said,

    December 15, 2012 at 22:07

    http://www.sciencedump.com/content/penguin-falls-down-and-makes-adorable-sound

    Now we know the Penguinese for “I meant to do that!”

  458. paleotectonics said,

    December 15, 2012 at 23:09

    Now we know the Penguinese for “I meant to do that!”

    For Your Consideration.

  459. Jeffersonian Republican said,

    December 16, 2012 at 0:00

    Glenn Beck was 100% correct when he said that it is soul problem not a gun problem. The left is made up of some of the most appaling reprehensible slime to ever darken the light of day. Apparently nothing is beyond politicizing for the left, not even a tragedy involving the death of twenty children. The Second Amendment is a sacred right of free men, no government has the right to deprive the people of their liberty. I am a gunower and have never broken the law in my life. However, if anyone attempts to seize my guns, I will send them on a one way trip to their final judgment.

  460. paleotectonics said,

    December 16, 2012 at 0:23

    Jefferson Davis Republican:

    Just keep fuckin’ that chicken gun barrel. Use lots of Hoppes No. 9, keeps the barrel clean and your willie sparkly.

    I am a gunower and have never broken the law in my life
    Nor have you ever won a spelling bee – The Redneck Trifecta!

  461. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 16, 2012 at 0:23

    However, if anyone attempts to seize my guns, I will send them on a one way trip to their final judgment.

    No you won’t.

  462. bbkf said,

    December 16, 2012 at 0:30

    ooooh…i got pwnd…one of god botherers friends posted this to me:

    I don’t know you and I never will know you, but I’ll give you an answer. You are either extremely arrogant, thoughtless, stupid or mean or more likely a dangerous combination of all of the above to ask a question like that at a time like this. You should be ashamed of yourself!

  463. J Neo Marvin said,

    December 16, 2012 at 0:38

    Glenn Beck was 100% correct when he said that it is soul problem not a gun problem.

    I see you have your soul-proof vest on.

  464. J Neo Marvin said,

    December 16, 2012 at 0:39

    I am a gunower

    You’ve borrowed that gun long enough. Give it back.

  465. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 16, 2012 at 0:52

    I see you have your soul-proof vest on.

    And the matching smart-proof hat.
    .

  466. J Neo Marvin said,

    December 16, 2012 at 1:05

    The guy who shot those kids was a young adult, not a student in the school. How would adding religion to the school’s curriculum change what happened in any way?

  467. J Neo Marvin said,

    December 16, 2012 at 1:08

    Clearly I also am either extremely arrogant, thoughtless, stupid or mean or more likely a dangerous combination of all of the above to ask a question like that at a time like this. I should be ashamed of myself.

  468. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 16, 2012 at 1:11

    Poe’s Law on a Saturday afternoon.

  469. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 16, 2012 at 1:13

    How DARE you question our politicizing this tragedy? YOU MONSTER!

  470. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 16, 2012 at 1:19

    bbkf can ask her friend why God would be so much better at protecting children in schools from murderers than He is at the seemingly minor problem of protecting children in churches from molestation.

  471. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 16, 2012 at 1:21

    Oooooh! Forbidden Planet is on TCM!

  472. J Neo Marvin said,

    December 16, 2012 at 1:32

    We’re a thread-killing tag team! Where is your God now?

  473. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 16, 2012 at 1:35

    Forbidden Planet is on TCM!

    Needs moar interocitor.
    .

  474. Pryme said,

    December 16, 2012 at 1:37

    How would adding religion to the school’s curriculum change what happened in any way?

    He would have been overpowered by the Care Bear Stare power of prayer. Unless, of course, he was an atheist; in that case praying wouldn’t have swayed him at all.*

    *much like the teacher he shot after she told him her students were in the gym (they weren’t; she had hidden them in the cupboards, lockers and cabinets of the classroom).

  475. Another Kiwi said,

    December 16, 2012 at 1:38

    most ,appaling appealing reprehensible FTFY. What else could Jepperwhosiwhats Republican mean?

  476. Another Kiwi said,

    December 16, 2012 at 1:40

    OMG there more time I spend here the more extremely arrogant, thoughtless, stupid or mean or more likely a dangerous combination of all of the above, I get.
    I hope you’re all proud of this.

  477. J Neo Marvin said,

    December 16, 2012 at 1:45

    I’m so proud!

  478. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 16, 2012 at 1:47

    Glenn Beck, in all this god/murder business, is curiously silent about Anders Breivik.

  479. El Manquécito said,

    December 16, 2012 at 1:50

    I’m just as arrogant and mean (I like to say ‘thrifty’) as I was when I got here. I’ll have to think about the thoughtless and stupid, though I admit it’s a possibility.

  480. Another Kiwi said,

    December 16, 2012 at 1:53

    I’m so proud! Good music from before Monet, Renoir and Degas got famous.

  481. Pryme said,

    December 16, 2012 at 1:54

    Memo to NRA: The “if the employees had guns, this would never had happened” mumbo-jumbo ain’t gonna fly this time, guys.

  482. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 16, 2012 at 2:10

    You’ll take my pr0n out of my damp, sticky hand!
    .

  483. tigris said,

    December 16, 2012 at 2:23

    arrogant blah blah blah to ask a question like that at a time like this

    Says the person who a) admits they don’t know you and yet still feels free to judge you and b)is supporting the God lets kids die because people disagree with me on religion post. Yeah, SOMEbody is being an arrogant asshole in this dialogue.

  484. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 16, 2012 at 2:24

    They are oddly silent as well on the subject of Oikos University.

  485. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 16, 2012 at 2:36

    They are oddly silent as well on the subject of Oikos University.

    That’s California. Dog left California eons ago.
    .

  486. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 16, 2012 at 2:51

    You know what would be awesome? If you guys repealed the Second Amendment.

  487. Spearhafoc, who waits dreaming in his house at R'lyeh said,

    December 16, 2012 at 2:52

    You know what would be awesome? If you guys repealed the Second Amendment.

    Yeah, that thing seems to have caused nothing but trouble. Makes no sense to me.

  488. J Neo Marvin said,

    December 16, 2012 at 2:53

    Good music from before Monet, Renoir and Degas got famous.

    The French impressionists ain’t got nuthin’ on the Chicago ones.

  489. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 16, 2012 at 2:53

    You know what would be awesome? If you guys repealed the Second Amendment.

    Right after my unicorn tree flowers.
    .

  490. Substance McGravitas said,

    December 16, 2012 at 3:00

    I won’t feel safe until all the professors at Miskatonic University are armed.

  491. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 16, 2012 at 3:01

    You gotta start somewhere. Was gay marriage believable as a possibility on the 50s?

    Repeal the fucking thing. When idiots Argleblargle about looming tyrannical despotism, laugh in their fucking faces. Ask them what the guck their stupid PENIS surrogates are going to do in the face of the US military. Better still, cockpunch the losers and fuck their moms.

  492. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 16, 2012 at 3:02

    Whoa weird gucking typos.

  493. Spearhafoc, who waits dreaming in his house at R'lyeh said,

    December 16, 2012 at 3:02

    I won’t feel safe until all the professors at Miskatonic University are armed.

    Guns are useless against the madness that spawns from knowledge of our true place in the cosmos!

  494. tigris said,

    December 16, 2012 at 3:18

    I won’t feel safe until all the professors at Miskatonic University are armed.

    I think they’re issued a flamethrower when they get tenure.

  495. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 16, 2012 at 3:28

    Considering that they spend so much time investigating things that cause unhinged madness in humans, perhaps having them heavily armed isn’t such a great idea.

  496. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 16, 2012 at 3:34

    I’m all outta apple butter.
    .

  497. Major Kong said,

    December 16, 2012 at 3:44

    However, if anyone attempts to seize my guns, I will send them on a one way trip to their final judgment.

    The Predator drone locking on to you from 5 miles up is really scared.

  498. N__B said,

    December 16, 2012 at 3:54

    Do Predators Dream Of Legless Mice People?

  499. bbkf said,

    December 16, 2012 at 3:58

    fivefecking hundred!

  500. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 16, 2012 at 3:59

    Here’s how seizing guns will work – an amnesty period, probably a few years or so, for voluntary rendition. Notices sent to known holdouts. Then nothing. Nada. Zilcho. No one gives a shit about “your guns” you backwards jackaninnies. It is not about you, it’s about innocent people getting shot by psychotics or delusionals or whatever. The goal isn’t zero guns, it is just fewer than one for every man woman and child or whatever the number is right now. And to support that trend downwards.

    People still drink and drive FFS. But it’s no longer seen as reasonable, let alone normal or expected.

    When you accidentally shoot yourself in the leg later, you’ll just have a rough time explaining to the paramedics and probably end up with no more than a fine. They probably won’t even bother looking for the rest of your cache.

  501. bbkf said,

    December 16, 2012 at 4:07

    I’m all outta apple butter.
    this struck me as pornographic for no odd reason…

  502. wiley said,

    December 16, 2012 at 4:20

    The best commentary ever about American godbotherers comes straight from Satan and is very funny.

    http://www.online-literature.com/twain/letters-from-the-earth/

    Is it hideous, is it odious, is it terrible?

  503. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 16, 2012 at 4:20

    Buttering the apple.

  504. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 16, 2012 at 4:22

    Interesting that so many FURRINERS is telling us EXCEPTIONAL MURKENS how to live our lives. NOT YOUR BUSINESS.

  505. daphne said,

    December 16, 2012 at 4:25

    A Stepford Wife who couldn’t manage to land herself a televised gig in a landscape where right-wing networks are desperate to throw up a vaguely young, vaguely attractive face to try and convince their septugenarian viewership that their views are still hip and with it. Who else?

    And with that, my work on this thread is done.

  506. VCarlson said,

    December 16, 2012 at 4:25

    I’m all outta apple butter.

    How’s your graham cracker supply? That was the other ingredient in that dish, wasn’t it?

  507. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 16, 2012 at 4:27

    this struck me as pornographic for no odd reason…

    As well it should!

    :lol:
    .

  508. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 16, 2012 at 4:29

    How’s your graham cracker supply? That was the other ingredient in that dish, wasn’t it?

    You HAVE to try that. No shit. APPLEBUTTER.
    .

  509. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 16, 2012 at 4:32

    I am downloading criminal tools over the Intertronz at 4G speed while enjoying a bargain beer (Buschhhhh!) and considering taking over the entire planet.
    .

  510. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 16, 2012 at 4:48

    1. Teh Ho has been watching bad, bad films today – Forbidden Planet (sorry, no interociters in that one) was my fortunate diversion while he was chained to the laundry station otherwise occupied. But that’s not what I want to talk about. So SyFy, formerly “the skeefee channel” had listed the following movie, that following the horribly bad zombie flik he had on, was “The Dead.” SyFy got the title right but the description was for John Huston’s final film which starred Angelica, based on Joyce’s story in Dubliners. The clods at SyFy fucked up amusingly.

    2. I don’t really care but I do have to wonder WTF is dphn on about now.

    3. Beef brisket, smothered as St. Julia says to do it. I played fast and loose with Julia’s recipe but the spirit is there. That’s the way recipes are supposed to work – you read the recipe then put it away and go cook. Spinach soufflé is so easy and tasty so that will be on the plate tonight too.

  511. St. Trotsky, Pope-in-Avignon said,

    December 16, 2012 at 4:55

    I think the main issue with “why not just repeal the damn thing” is that, well, we’re America. Right now, I have an easier time seeing the political weight behind repealing literally any other amendment in the Bill of Rights than the Second. We will go back to 3/5ths a black person and no voting for women, we will strip away the right to freely associate or not have a state religion before Congress fucks with the gun manufacturers.

  512. bbkf said,

    December 16, 2012 at 5:58

    The best commentary ever about American godbotherers comes straight from Satan and is very funny.

    ooh im glad you linked that wiley…twain is brilliant…

  513. Smut Clyde said,

    December 16, 2012 at 6:05

    Here’s how seizing guns will work

    Bookmark it, libs!

  514. CRA said,

    December 16, 2012 at 6:38

    Glenn Beck was 100% correct when he said that it is soul problem not a gun problem. The left is made up of some of the most appaling reprehensible slime to ever darken the light of day. Apparently nothing is beyond politicizing for the left, not even a tragedy involving the death of twenty children. The Second Amendment is a sacred right of free men, no government has the right to deprive the people of their liberty. I am a gunower and have never broken the law in my life. However, if anyone attempts to seize my guns, I will send them on a one way trip to their final judgment.

    … Reminds me of another quote I saw today:

    “After a shooting spree,” author William Burroughs once said, “they always want to take the guns away from the people who didn’t do it.” Burroughs continued: “I sure as hell wouldn’t want to live in a society where the only people allowed guns are the police and the military.”

    I saw this quote in the context of pointing out that Burroughs accidentally killed his wife with a gun during an intoxicated “William Tell”-type stunt.

    That’s true, but beyond that, Burroughs was a predatory pedophile. Utterly immoral and inexcusable. A notable artist, yes, but his work is not worth the backstory that informs it.

    It pains me to state, because as a young man I was a fan of his work. I read most of it, sometimes twice. I like to think it furthered my esthetic development and led me to think about moral issues surrounding sex, power, and who knows what else. Burroughs can shake up your sense of structure, certainly.

    Burroughs thought paying third-world boys to have sex with each other was a fun pastime. “They’re hungry,” he said — I kid you not. Like many people, he simply identified his desires and then cobbled together a rationale or two. The difference is that he had certain gifts.

    Getting back to guns, Burroughs is full of shit. He had no concern for a functional society. He was a parasite in the sense that he benefited from a United States that did not consist of people as predatory and amoral as himself. He traveled to third-world countries to take advantage of impoverished people and their general lack of statecraft.

    Oh yeah, guns. Well, there is little substantive difference between Burroughs and a gun-fetishist wingnut. Both of them think destroying innocent children is just the price we have to pay for individualistic awesomeness. How many kids did Burroughs assault? Not that many (and he paid them, albeit a pittance (overseas)). He loved guns but he didn’t like shooting people — he only did so once, on accident. He didn’t have to: his desires were met by other means.

    In a general sense, this is why the wingnut motivation is so broadly popular. The Second Amendment is not simply protecting law-abiding patriots. Some of them imagine they’d fight against the government. Others, like Burroughs, are bad people who understand that they might need guns (esp. powerful ones) to dominate and harm other people for their own selfish interests. (The “freedom” they seek is for themselves.)

    In brief, a real gun control discussion would identify people who are using the 2nd amendment as a fig leaf for subversion, and let’s not kiss their asses. They really aren’t much better than people we know as major felons.

  515. CRA said,

    December 16, 2012 at 6:46

    Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
    December 16, 2012 at 3:59
    Here’s how seizing guns will work –

    This is good, worth reading.

  516. Smut Clyde said,

    December 16, 2012 at 7:15

    I had forgotten that “Jeffersonian Republican” is in my kill-file so FF replaces any emanations from him with the words “ph’nglui mglw nafh cthulhu r’lyeh wgah nagl fhtagn!!”

    Consequently, I first imagined that he was responding to the immediately-previous discussion of what penguins say when they fall over.

  517. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 16, 2012 at 7:24

    Oh. APPLE BUTTER.
    .

  518. Jeffersonian Republican said,

    December 16, 2012 at 7:50

    It is about individual freedom when the left attempts to use a tragedy such as the Conneticut school shootings to justify gutting the second amendment. Don’t you people find anything sacred? Is there nothing to you godless immoral pigs that is above politicizing? My guns and the guns of millions of law abiding citizens Nationwide are for defensive purposes only. They are to defend ourselves, our families, our property, and our liberty. We won’t bother you if you don’t bother us. But if you mess with us then you will experience our version of gun control first hand. The ability to hit one’s target.

  519. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 16, 2012 at 7:54

    Don’t you people find anything sacred?

    Such as the lives of 6 year-olds?
    .

  520. Smut Clyde said,

    December 16, 2012 at 8:00

    People still drink and drive FFS. But it’s no longer seen as reasonable, let alone normal or expected.

    Gun ownership in NZ: NOT GLAMOROUS. Farmers own guns. FARMERS for feck’s sake, no-one wants to be mistaken for a sheepshagger or a cow-cockie, where the fashion options are largely restricted to “black t-shirt tucked inside one’s underpants”.

    And there are gun collectors, who are generally regarded as combining the kind of personality you associate with a Collector of anything with the ‘active fantasy life’, “very quiet neighbour” traits more specific to firearm fixation. Again, not exactly models for emulation.

  521. CRA said,

    December 16, 2012 at 8:07

    Don’t you people find anything sacred? –probably a troll, but still:

    There are real people, real things, and then mere ideas.

    The people massacred on Friday were real. The killer was motivated by selfish, disturbed ideas, but his targets (as you say) were real.

    When you go on about the 2nd Amendment, and what’s sacred to you, but then put targets in your sights, you choose to stand with Friday’s killer. He was defending himself (i.e. his ideals), you see? We tread on him (i.e. his sense of things). He wouldn’t stand for it any longer.

  522. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 16, 2012 at 8:07

    Is there nothing to you godless immoral pigs that is above politicizing?

    Such as four adults killed in Libya, vs. 20 <i.children killed in Connecticut?
    .

  523. VCarlson said,

    December 16, 2012 at 8:37

    Speaking only for myself, my property is not worth anyone’s life. And even if I were inclined to use a firearm to defend myself, my neighbors would not thank me for random lead flying about.

  524. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    December 16, 2012 at 9:24

    We won’t bother you if you don’t bother us.

    Says the asshole who’s trolling our board.

    Funny guys like him don’t believe in the Second Amendment, they believe in a bastardized version of it which leaves out an entire clause. Strict constructionist, my ass!

  525. smut clyde said,

    December 16, 2012 at 9:55

    Don’t you people find anything sacred?

    I thank the dark gods of my people that although I am a failure as a decent human being in almost every respect, and a reproach to everyone who ever cared for me, at least I am not an internet troll who gets his shits-’n'-giggles by going on-line to accuse other people of treating mass murder as an excuse for merriment.

  526. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    December 16, 2012 at 10:13

    the dark gods of my people

    That sounds overly dramatic, she’s just a cat!

  527. John Revolta said,

    December 16, 2012 at 13:09

    Wow. Althouse tops herself.

    Why did Adam, after killing his mother, travel to the school where she worked? Shouldn’t some suspicion fall on the mother? She looks like a victim, but could she and her son have been operating together?

    Um, yeah. It all makes sense now.

    Also,

    But why isn’t there more talk about institutionalizing the mentally ill?

    What, on the backs of the taxpayers? The very idea!

    Jeeeeeezus K.

  528. smut clyde said,

    December 16, 2012 at 13:26

    But why isn’t there more talk about institutionalizing the mentally ill?

    Silly rabbit. Mental illness is an institution already, at least in US politics.
    To be charitable, by “institutionalizing” perhaps she meant “involuntarily committing”, which worked so well in the Soviet Union.

  529. Suezboo said,

    December 16, 2012 at 14:32

    Hey, could someone else also awake try accessing TBogg or Firedoglake for me please?
    I don’t know if it’s just me or if the actual site is down for some reason.
    Thanks etc.

  530. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    December 16, 2012 at 14:37

    Why did Adam, after killing his mother, travel to the school where she worked? Shouldn’t some suspicion fall on the mother? She looks like a victim, but could she and her son have been operating together?

    Sounds like Althouse has been reading Lovecraft, not knowing it’s fiction.

    Hey, could someone else also awake try accessing TBogg or Firedoglake for me please?
    I don’t know if it’s just me or if the actual site is down for some reason.

    There appears to be a problem Ms. Boo. The site’s not loading for me.

  531. Fenwick said,

    December 16, 2012 at 14:42

    You know what would be awesome? If you guys repealed the Second Amendment.

    It is by far the most poorly-worded and ambiguous of the Bill of Rights. I’m in favor of repeal, but, alas, it is a political impossibility in the current landscape of American ‘politics’.

  532. Fenwick said,

    December 16, 2012 at 14:58

    bbfk: Another tagfail at 5:58. You’re on such a roll in this thread. Going for a personal best? You go girl!

    Also, when you describe the antediluvian politics of your colleagues and your family, it makes me thankful for my people. I admire your self-control.

  533. Fenwick said,

    December 16, 2012 at 15:00

    I meant ‘relatives’. Not yer own family.

  534. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    December 16, 2012 at 15:01

    It is by far the most poorly-worded and ambiguous of the Bill of Rights. I’m in favor of repeal, but, alas, it is a political impossibility in the current landscape of American ‘politics’.

    There’s no need for a repeal, just enforce the whole amendment, which specifically invokes a “well regulated militia”.

  535. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

    December 16, 2012 at 15:48

    It works!

    This is the default web page for this server.

    The web server software is running but no content has been added, yet.

    That’s what I get when I click my FDL link.

    Seems to be a problem, Houston.
    ~

  536. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    December 16, 2012 at 16:54

    Let’s be clear about the Second Amendment – armed civilians ensuring “a free society” can only mean one of two things. Repelling foreign invaders Red Dawn/Iraqi insurgency style – which, yeah right. OR armed insurrection – attempting to overthrow the government of the United States by violent means. Which, yeah right.

    Repeal the stupid fucking thing already.

  537. tigris said,

    December 16, 2012 at 17:07

    Why did Adam, after killing his mother, travel to the school where she worked?

    Last I heard she didn’t work there. She may have been partially at fault but who knows? Plus she’s dead so I suppose the worst you could now do is nastily sneer about her and talk out of your hat, so mission accomplished. Also as to why we don’t institutionalize, thank Ronald Reagan.

    BBKF, here’s a thought for your “friend”: Reveling in the death of children because it proves that you were right all along about a law to ban prayer in schools? No wonder people hate us. If this is our attitude, they should. from here

  538. Bitter Scribe said,

    December 16, 2012 at 17:29

    “An armed society is a polite society.”

    NO IT FUCKING ISN’T.

    I have never read this Robert Heinlein or whatever the fuck his name is, but anyone who could mistake the USA we now live in for “a polite society” is too stupid to live. As are the people who take him seriously.

  539. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 16, 2012 at 17:35

    anyone who could mistake the USA we now live in for “a polite society” is too stupid to live

    The other side’s argument, obviously and plainly, is that our society (U.S.) is not armed enough to yet be “polite.”
    .

  540. Major Kong said,

    December 16, 2012 at 17:40

    Latest diary is up in case I haven’t bored you people enough already.

    http://www.dailykos.com/story/2012/12/15/1169715/-Flying-the-B-52-Part-3

  541. Bitter Scribe said,

    December 16, 2012 at 17:48

    The other side’s argument, obviously and plainly, is that our society (U.S.) is not armed enough to yet be “polite.”

    To paraphrase the late, great Mike Royko: If we could magically fix things so that these motherfuckers could only shoot each other, I’d sell them guns at 7-Elevens.

  542. Major Kong said,

    December 16, 2012 at 17:57

    Might as well just leave tubs full of free handguns on every street corner at this point.

  543. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 16, 2012 at 18:03

    My guns and the guns of millions of law abiding citizens Nationwide are for defensive purposes only. They are to defend ourselves, our families, our property, and our liberty. We won’t bother you if you don’t bother us. But if you mess with us then you will experience our version of gun control first hand. The ability to hit one’s target.

    WRNOG. The vast majority of gun owners I know (including myself) bought our guns to kill animals. The kind of animals one eats, not animals like like the troll. Defense is least in our minds. Some of us, Teh Ho for example, have guns primarily to shoot the inanimate type of “birds” known as clay pigeons. Though we have never discussed it, I can guarantee that defense was never in mind with respect to his guns. I also know a fair number of people who enjoy target shooting and they take it pretty seriously. A few of those people would list defense as one factor in their gun ownership but I don’t know any of them likely to say that defense is the primary reason for having guns.

    Jeffersonian Republican Is a paranoid delusional. If only we took mental health seriously.

  544. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 16, 2012 at 18:07

    Proof that prayer in school isn’t the problem. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heath_High_School_shooting

  545. Suezboo said,

    December 16, 2012 at 18:13

    Major, diary read and enjoyed, sir.
    I thought nowadays to drive and refuel an aeroplane you just had to push a few buttons, twiddle a few knobs, watch a few dials.
    This diary, like the others, is sure learning me stuff. Thanks.

  546. Whale Chowder said,

    December 16, 2012 at 19:05

    My guns and the guns of millions of law abiding citizens Nationwide are for defensive purposes only. They are to defend ourselves, our families, our property, and our liberty.

    Hm, how’d that work out for Nancy Lanza, gun enthusiast?

    Fucking morons.

    It also pisses me off that I keep mistaking the troll’s handle for our own JP and being deeply confused.

  547. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 16, 2012 at 19:12

    It also pisses me off that I keep mistaking the troll’s handle for our own JP and being deeply confused.

    Who, me? I fucking LOVE guns!
    .

  548. Major Kong said,

    December 16, 2012 at 19:19

    Who, me? I fucking LOVE guns!

    Well, you do live in Tennessee…..

  549. Whale Chowder said,

    December 16, 2012 at 19:28

    Who, me? I fucking LOVE guns!

    Y’know, I’ve done target shooting and have family that hunts…I totally get the attraction of loud, dangerous bangy things.

    I just don’t harbor any illusions that having them would make me or my family any safer or more free.

  550. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 16, 2012 at 19:35

    Y’know, I’ve done target shooting and have family that hunts…I totally get the attraction of loud, dangerous bangy things.

    I just don’t harbor any illusions that having them would make me or my family any safer or more free.

    I was never that big on ‘em. Dad and all the adult males I knew growing up were hunters. Before Dad would even consider buying me a BB gun (at age… 12?), I had to prove that I was responsible and mature enough to handle one… so I didn’t get to put BBs in it for the first, oh, six months. Dad taught me about gun safety, and care and storage.

    I do own a semiauto pistol — one. I don’t particularly feel a need for it now, but there was a time I did. I target shoot maybe twice a year, clean and oil it, and stow it away, unloaded, ammo in a different location.
    .

  551. Major Kong said,

    December 16, 2012 at 19:36

    I was in the crew room the other night and listening to two of the resident idiots talking about the Mexican drug wars.

    Apparently the solution to all their problems down there would be less restrictive civilian gun ownership. Who knew?

    I can see it now – the heavily armed Mexican drug gang stands there awestruck as I fix them with my steely gaze, unholster my Kimber Tactical Ultra (gun nuts love 1911s for some reason) and pick them off one by one with well-placed .45 rounds.

    If anyone needs me I’ll be standing in front of a mirror, practicing my “Go ahead, make my day” lines.

  552. Major Kong said,

    December 16, 2012 at 19:37

    Before Dad would even consider buying me a BB gun

    I was never allowed to have one. “You’ll put your eye out”. Seriously.

    In fact, anything I wanted to do when I was young seemed to involve either me losing and eye or causing some other kid to lose an eye.

    You would think the world would be full of one-eyed children at this point.

  553. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 16, 2012 at 19:40

    I was never allowed to have one. “You’ll put your eye out”. Seriously.

    The rule was, it had to stay at my grandparents’ house, which was in BFE. That’s where Dad kept most of his guns, so it made pretty good sense to Younger Me.
    .

  554. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 16, 2012 at 19:42

    (gun nuts love 1911s for some reason

    There’s some good reasons to be a 1911 fan – I am a fan – but there’s some culty shit going on with the nut jobs.

  555. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 16, 2012 at 19:47

    “V the K” over at GayPutzRiot delivers.

    Ever notice that the unvarying Progressive Fascist response to these events is to take away the rights of law-abiding people?

    No.

    And if the shooter had been caught alive, these same people would have opposed the death penalty for him and insisted he be given voting rights.

    That is so f–ked up.

    Your first comment regarding 20 dead children is solely to cast aspersions about people with whom you have a political disagreement. Broad brush accusations that have little or no basis in reality, no less.

    Ever notice that the unvarying paranoid delusional response to tragedies like this is to attack people who disagree with your politics? You’re more concerned – obsessed, really – with an idea, an abstract political idea, than the REAL murder of 27 people, 20 of them _children_. THAT is f-ked up.

    Comment by PeeJ — December 16, 2012 @ 12:36 pm – December 16, 2012

    I have more than a mild sociopathy thing going on but I don’t _hate_ people, I just _dislike_ the vast majority of my conspecifics. There are a few that deserve hate.

  556. Major Kong said,

    December 16, 2012 at 19:48

    I do own a 1911 (Kimber). It’s very accurate but highly unreliable.

    It will fail to extract roughly one out every 20 rounds. That’s after sending it back to the factory to have the extractor fixed. I expect better from a $1000 gun.

    My Beretta 92 that I’ve had since 1990 has never malfunctioned.

  557. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 16, 2012 at 19:48

    Oops. The first sentence should be italicalized. I blame society.

  558. N__B said,

    December 16, 2012 at 19:49

    I fucking LOVE guns!

    I respect guns and enjoy their company, but I prefer by penis without ballistic grooving.

  559. N__B said,

    December 16, 2012 at 19:49

    “my penis” too, now that I borked the joke.

  560. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    December 16, 2012 at 19:52

    I respect guns and enjoy their company, but I prefer by penis without ballistic grooving.

    I was actually trying to evoke the image of the little kid in the “I FUCKING LOVE COLORING!” meme. :)
    .

  561. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 16, 2012 at 20:03

    In a first-of its-kind study, epidemiologists at the University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine found that, on average, guns did not protect those who possessed them from being shot in an assault. The study estimated that people with a gun were 4.5 times more likely to be shot in an assault than those not possessing a gun.

    http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2009/09/090930121512.htm

  562. N__B said,

    December 16, 2012 at 20:03

    If anyone is tired of the horrors of modern life, my BLOGWHORE current post is a refreshing dive into the horrors of 122 years ago: http://nedbeaumontjr.wordpress.com/2012/12/16/muckraking-at-its-best/

  563. Whale Chowder said,

    December 16, 2012 at 20:04

    I prefer [m]y penis without ballistic grooving.

    Don’t knock it; you get better distance and accuracy. Even better with a “hot load.”

  564. N__B said,

    December 16, 2012 at 20:04

    The study estimated that people with a gun were 4.5 times more likely to be shot in an assault than those not possessing a gun.

    Testosterone is a helluva drug.

  565. Major Kong said,

    December 16, 2012 at 20:09

    The study estimated that people with a gun were 4.5 times more likely to be shot in an assault than those not possessing a gun.

    This doesn’t surprise me. I think having a gun gives people a false sense of security, making them more likely to take risks rather than avoiding danger.

  566. Fenwick said,

    December 16, 2012 at 20:28

    Right now, I have an easier time seeing the political weight behind repealing literally any other amendment in the Bill of Rights than the Second

    In my opinion, the 4th Amendment is already gone, for all practical purposes. The text(*) is still there in the Constitution, to be sure, in all its noble, clear, and categorical wording; but the 4th Amendment has been fatally weakened and hollowed into little more than a cosmetic shell during the last 12 years.

    (*)The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no Warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by Oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.

    And after 16 years of relentless undermining, it will be beyond repair. Sorry, folks, but the Fourth Amendment has been gutted and its not coming back. We live in a Surveillance State.

    ——————
    FWIW: But that’s not reason not to fight it! Because of financial constraints, I had to trim all of my charitable and political donations…except one: I’ve been an ACLU member for over 20 years. I believe passionately in defending civil liberties. I keep the ID card in my wallet; I’m proud to carry it.

  567. Jeffersonian Republican said,

    December 16, 2012 at 20:31

    Armed society is a polite society. Ever been to Texas or Idaho motherfuckers? If that scumbag tried a school shooting in say rural Idaho for example, he barely would have entered the school before his body would be ridden with lead from .45 caliber bullets.

  568. N__B said,

    December 16, 2012 at 20:34

    Everyone look out! JR is going to swamp the thread with his jizz.

  569. Jeffersonian Republican said,

    December 16, 2012 at 20:34

    And btw, the Bushmaster AR-15 Carbine makes an excellent home defense weapon. So there are legitimate needs to own so-called “assault rifles.”

  570. Bitter Scribe said,

    December 16, 2012 at 20:35

    Armed society is a polite society. Ever been to Texas or Idaho motherfuckers?

    Or Colorado? Kentucky? Virginia?

    Oh wait…

    Dumbass.

  571. N__B said,

    December 16, 2012 at 20:36

    I’ve never been attacked by a home. I think I’d defend myself against one with a crowbar and hacksaw.

  572. Major Kong said,

    December 16, 2012 at 20:39

    I think I’d defend myself against one with a crowbar and hacksaw.

    Crowbars also work well against zombies, head-crabs and Combine troopers.

  573. Bitter Scribe said,

    December 16, 2012 at 20:40

    Hey, Jeffersonian Fuckhead, why don’t you take your “Bushmaster AR-15 carbine” and shoot yourself with it?

    Not in the head, though. We want you to hit a vital organ.

  574. N__B said,

    December 16, 2012 at 20:43

    Crowbars also work well against zombies, head-crabs and Combine troopers.

    Don’t work worth a damn against ant-lions.

  575. Major Kong said,

    December 16, 2012 at 20:53

    Armed society is a polite society.

    Because nobody with a gun has ever been killed. It’s like a magical talisman that protects you from all harm.

    If only all those soldiers killed in Vietnam had been armed.

  576. tigris said,

    December 16, 2012 at 21:06

    I thought this was worth reading

  577. Fenwick said,

    December 16, 2012 at 21:40

    On topic: I have not owned a gun in forty years. I have never hunted and have no desire to do so. Many of my relatives, however, are avid hunters. Although I do not particularly like it, I can understand the attraction of hunting as a recreation. I’m sure there are Sadlies who enjoy hunting.

    While on the subject of hunters, cranky old Fenwick disgrees with an overly-broad Canuckistani generalization about gun-owners; and the universal application of a Freudian cliche. Evidence: gun owner Major Kong. And, if I remember, tsam–where IS that boy?–and OBS are also gun-owners. (Correct me if I’m wrong.) Any other Sadlies? Sound out if you are a gun owner; I’m curious about this. (Or are you too afraid to come out of the gun cabinet about your PENIS obsession?)

    ———————
    All of the discussion in the thread so far has not mentiioned target-shooting. I did a bit in basic training, and enjoyed the challenge–though I was an extremely bad shot. I can easily see why someone would take up target shooting for recreation, such as at skeet ranges or indoor ranges. I also see the value of target shooting as a sport; it has been an Olympic sport for a long time.

    Coming up after I finish writing it: Why I should not own a gun. First thing: I’ve got to go find wiley’s terrific comment. Also ketchup the thread.

  578. J Neo Marvin said,

    December 16, 2012 at 21:43

    And btw, the Bushmaster AR-15 Carbine makes an excellent home defense weapon.

    Just ask Nancy Lanza.

  579. Fenwick said,

    December 16, 2012 at 21:43

    NEW THREAD

  580. Pupienus, Doctor of Anathematics said,

    December 16, 2012 at 21:45

    Yes, Pupienus is a lefty liberal faget gun owner.

  581. Porlock Junior said,

    December 16, 2012 at 22:43

    @Pupienus
    Religion is a spandrel and not a meme? Now that’s news: the Gouldists are trying to take over some of the Dawkins gang’s turf. Should be interesting to watch. Especially since there is no such thing as a meme. (Pass it on.)

  582. mr. mike said,

    December 17, 2012 at 5:23

    I just want to say to Major Kong that his descriptions of flying the BUFF were fascinating; I always had a suspicion that operating a B-52 was an endurance test even after Curtis LeMay left – any plane that has eight engines and weighs anywhere from 280,000 to 500,000 pounds has to be. I didn’t realize the B-52 lacks some sort of toilet, not even a tube with a funnel on it running to a Porto-San tank….they don’t mention that sort of stuff in the reference books on military aircraft; it’s all “computerized radars”, cross-section drawings mostly made up of guesswork, weapons loadouts, and photos of the cockpit with steel plates over the newest wonder dial/screen/bank of switches.

    I think this could make a good book if you expanded it further; it might make a good companion piece to Col. Jack Broughton’s “Thud Ridge.”

  583. doctorpsycho1960 said,

    December 21, 2012 at 4:56

    Tits On A Bag — Search Results:

    http://doctorpsycho1960.tumblr.com/post/38433909795/somebody-here

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