Oct
30

Does Dr. Seuss’s Ghost Need to Choke a Bitch?




Posted at 8:00 by Cerberus

Dr. Seuss don’t have to put up with this shit. He knows if people had a real choice, they’d choose the Who State, every damn time.

William Voegli, National Eyebonger:
Red, State, Blue State

Shorter (or the last port before Jungle):

  • Okay, maybe so-called studies have shown that people living in blue states live longer, live healthier, have more money and new industries, are happier, and generally better looking than our conservative paradise red states, but… Um, er, we’re still outbreeding you suckers. Also racist old people retire with us, so fuck science, conservative policies FOREVAH!

Yeah, it’s one of these ones.

Jonathan Cohn of The New Republic argues that it’s getting easier, but more alarming, to differentiate Blue from Red America.

Fuck, first line and we already have an “even the liberal New Republic”. Somehow I don’t think we’re going to be accidentally trodding on originality this post.

The one “looks more and more like Scandinavia

Snrk.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA(gasp)BWAHAHAHAAAHAAA! Ahhh.

Yeah, no.

Wish it was the case. Oh dear Bob in Himmel, do I wish it was the case. But sadly here in boring old regular reality, we’re having a good day if one of our blue states actually makes a brief halting step towards catching up with the rest of the world. It’d take so many decades upon decades of hippies winning to even approach where the Scandanavian countries are currently that we might as well give up now if that’s our goal. Settle for something we might yet reach, like the Balkin countries. C’mon, I think our most liberal states might yet catch up to Serbia if we all try hard!

, while the other increasingly resembles a social Darwinist’s paradise.”

Isn’t that a compliment?

Are you saying Christopher Chantrill lied to me?

In TNR’s current issue, Cohn examines, with the help of some academic researchers, the strength of the safety nets in blue and red states.

Well, that’s a deft transfer of ownership right there.

Almost like you were pants-shittingly terrified of actual countering the legitimate research and having to deal with all those messy facts and decided some blogger for The New Republic was more manageable.

But hey, we can’t say it’s false. In the same way no one can dispute that I built the Empire State Building (with the help of the architects, construction workers, and city planners who planned and constructed it) and that I won several Olympic Gold Medals (with the help of the athletes who actually won said medals).

The former he defines as those states carried by the Democratic presidential nominee in each of the past three elections. (That roster comprises California, Connecticut, Delaware, the District of Columbia, Illinois, Maine, Maryland, Massachusetts, Michigan, Minnesota, New Jersey, New York, Oregon, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island, Vermont, Washington, and Wisconsin.) Red states are those that voted for the Republican nominee in those same three elections (Alabama, Arizona, Arkansas, Georgia, Idaho, Kansas, Kentucky, Louisiana, Mississippi, Missouri, Montana, Nebraska, North Dakota, Oklahoma, South Carolina, South Dakota, Tennessee, Texas, Utah, and West Virginia). Cohn’s analysis leaves out purple states, which favored one party, then the other, over the past decade’s presidential contests; as well as Alaska, Hawaii, and Wyoming, whose economic idiosyncrasies would have distorted the picture.

“By nearly every measure,” Cohn concludes, “people who live in the blue states are healthier, wealthier, and generally better off than people in the red states.” Why?

Well, perhaps if instead of sprinting off to write a page’s worth of “nuh uh, YOU’RE the poopyheads” drivel, you could have hung around and read the studies cited showing the math on how blue states rate better than red states. Perhaps you could have even gone on to see the correlations in Europe that further back up the sobering reality that yes, it turns out that liberal economic and social policy really do create stronger economies and happier people.

Almost as if people are less likely to be stressed out balls of violent desperation when people aren’t willing to collapse society just to “get at them” and where tightly-wound right-wing psychotics can see that the gay isn’t really the existential threat they pretend it is to make the truck stop visits more exciting. Where people can just be people.

And as if the economy was healthier in areas where racing to the bottom wasn’t the only game in town and people have a social safety net to fall back on if things get hard. Because it turns out that founding new industries and businesses and retraining workforces to new industries is easier when people aren’t freaking out about starving if things go wrong. Besides-

He allows that causation is difficult to prove, but believes the strong correlation between the level of government spending on social welfare and indices of well-being “is hard to dismiss.”

Yes, that would be the shorter way to put it.

What? I said Jonathan Cohn writes for a shit paper and has a naive view of what “Scandanavia-like” is. I never said he was complete balls.

This is what complete balls looks like:

Here’s an odd thing, though: If people in the blue states are healthier, wealthier, wiser, prettier, funnier, and generally better off than people in the red states, why is Blue America growing so much more slowly than Red America?

Okay, yes, wingnuts, I get that the freakout about “relative population growth” is all a racist sexist freakout hoping that if you go oogedy boogedy about brown third world nations, white women will agree to give up their rights and become brood mares to “balance” things.

But still, let me make one point perfectly clear:

WE DON’T NEED ANY MORE POPULATION GROWTH.

We really fucking don’t. In fact, we could do with a hell of a lot of relative population shrinkage while we can still afford to do that without having to resort to costly and bloody wars over basic resources.

Sorry if this is a bit blunt, but we don’t even really have the food resources for the population we have now and we’re running out of the natural resources we need to prop up the current system. We don’t need any more fucking babies. I don’t care how scared you are of the third-world horde outbreeding you.

But hey, you know what might work better than trying to out-fuck them? How about stop exploiting the shit out of them and help give them a hand forming a legitimate first-world economy and help fight for global women’s rights and universal education. Then they’ll stop underbidding your workers and as a bonus, they’ll also stop out-breeding you as first-world nations with high education and strong rights for women tend to breed less overall.

On that note…

According to the Census Bureau, the overall population of the 18 blue states grew by 5.9 percent between 2000 and 2010. The 20 red states, by contrast, saw their total population increase by 13.6 percent. (The rest of the country grew by 12.6 percent.) We see the same thing if we look at changes over 20 years. The blue states’ total population increased by 15.9 percent between 1990 and 2010, half as fast as the 32.9 percent of the red states. (The rest of the country increased by 31.4 percent.) As a result of these different rates of growth, blue states accounted for 46.2 percent of the U.S. population in 2010, compared to 49.5 percent in 1990, while the red states’ proportion grew from 28.7 percent to 30.7 percent over the same two decades.

Cohn praises Massachusetts, the “quintessential blue state,” where “residents get a lot more help from their state government than people who live elsewhere in the United States,” including health care “available to almost everybody” and welfare benefits “among the most generous in the country.” Even by blue-state standards, however, the Massachusetts population is growing slowly — just 3.1 percent between 2000 and 2010, and 8.8 percent between 1990 and 2010. Both figures are about one-third the growth rate for the other 49 states plus Washington, D.C.

Social Darwinist Texas, on the other hand, “doesn’t even try to provide the kind of protection for its vulnerable residents that Massachusetts does,” with “more uninsured residents than any other state” and a welfare program “among the nation’s stingiest.” As a result, people are departing this quintessential red state in droves. Oh, wait. Texas grew by 20.6 percent between 2000 and 2010, nearly seven times as fast as Massachusetts, and 48 percent between 1990 and 2010, five and a half times as fast as the Bay State.

Of the ten states that grew most slowly between 2000 and 2010, seven — Michigan, Rhode Island, New York, Vermont, Massachusetts, Illinois, and Pennsylvania — are blue. (The others are purple Ohio and red West Virginia and Louisiana, which lost population after Hurricane Katrina.)

Really? This is your big counter to Blue States being healthier, wealthier, and happier? That you can outfuck them?

This is your counterargument to the charge that Republican policies have taken sections of the richest country of the world and have successfully given them third world economies? You have third world sex education and breeding patterns too?

Yeah, that’ll show those mean old blue staters whose the real victim to their governments ill-fated economic and social policies!

Six of the ten states that grew most rapidly were red ones: Arizona, Utah, Idaho, Texas, Georgia, and South Carolina. (The others were purple Nevada, North Carolina, Florida, and Colorado.)

Yes, let’s see at all this impressive growth.

Well, we’ve got:

A) popular retirement areas for old northeastern geezers tired of the cold (Arizona, Florida, Nevada)
B) areas dominated by creepy breeding cults (Utah, Idaho, Nevada, Colorado)
C) areas that grew because of consequences of abject poverty, usually targeted at a minority racial group whose growth is usually categorized a bad thing by wingnuts (Georgia, South Carolina, Texas, Arizona, Florida)
D) areas that have been growing larger and thus more urban, which is making the states less red and more blue (North Carolina, Texas)

Not a single one of them seems to have grown because of “totally kickass awesomeness that makes studies into the consequences of political outlooks completely meaningless and therefore easily dismissed lies”.

Strange.

Also, yeah, note that we’re only talking about relative increase, not total increase (thus cutting off inconvenient states like California) and totally ignoring that many of these gains come from racial minorities who are berated for “having too many kids they can’t feed” by wingnuts the other 364 days of the year.

One way a state’s population will grow is as a result of “natural increase” — the number of births minus the number of deaths. People have no choice about where they’re born and limited control over where they die, but more of a say about where they reside and work during the years in between.

Yeah, except for Quiverfull, Mormon, and Catholic families that see large family size as a commandment by God. Also all those snowbirds who migrate South in their old age so they can die in the warmth of a Southern State in a nice retirement community where everyone hates minorities as much as they do. And let’s not forget the massive effect social class, education level, sex education resources, cultural and religious attitudes, and women’s rights have on birth rates.

But besides all that, yeah, it’s all about choosing where you want to live and work…

Except who really has that freedom?

I mean, how many of us live where we do because we really really want to live there? Or have the job we do because it’s our dream job? Sure, some of us. And some of us may at least be within spitting distance to where we’d ideally live and ideally work.

But for the vast majority of us, we tend to go where the tropical storm winds blow us. Following lovers, job leads, less expensive housing, social support networks from family or friends, or wherever we lucked into getting a job that can at least make sure rent is paid.

Fuck, for many of us, we have more of a say in where we were born than where we’ll end up in the course of a lifetime.

The only people who really “choose” where they want to go tend to be rich middle-aged people and rich old people. And yeah, I bet they are more likely to see red states as the “promised land” largely because they are more than willing to sacrifice the poor saps living there to help aid the cognitive dissonance of rich white assholes.

Net migration” is the Census Bureau statistic assessing that phenomenon, which it breaks down into international and domestic (intranational) migration. The Bureau shows the U.S. population increasing by 8,944,170 between 2000 and 2009 from net international migration; California, Florida, New York, and Texas accounted for nearly half that total. By definition, however, net domestic migration leaves total national population unchanged while people redistribute themselves among the states. They did so between 2000 and 2009 by, overall, moving out of blue states and into red ones. Of the ten states that had, by absolute numbers, the highest population losses due to domestic out-migration, eight were blue: New York, California, Illinois, Michigan, New Jersey, Massachusetts, Connecticut, and Maryland. (Purple Ohio and red Louisiana were the others.) Of the states that had the biggest increases as a result of domestic in-migration, five (Texas, Arizona, Georgia, South Carolina, and Tennessee) were red; four (Florida, North Carolina, Nevada, and Colorado) were purple; and one (Washington) was blue.

As seen.

Cause older and richer Northeastern folks retiring after a career near the cities to a place in the sticks where they can have a lot of space and warm weather in the same way as they have done for centuries somehow means that’s where all the best paying jobs are from.

That’s why red states are giving more in tax money than they receive in benefits (oh wait, never mind).

It is “difficult,” writes Cohn, “to find any indicator of well-being in which red states consistently do better than blue states.”

And it is apparently still difficult, seeing as how good old Willy has found bupkis and shiza to defend them.

Because his article doesn’t mention the demographically stagnating

If you know what I mean and I think you do WINK WINK.

What officer? What whistle? Oh this giant ass whistle in my hand? No, you misunderstand, it’s just an ordinary walking stick… that can also summon dogs. Did I mention that I was white?

blue states and burgeoning red ones, he ventures no hypotheses about why so many people are fleeing havens that have flourished by taking The New Republic seriously

Even the liberal New Republic round two. And here I thought the days of wingnuts quoting the New Republic as if it was the hivemind of liberal discourse were over.

Sigh.

and flocking to states rendered ghastly dystopias by ignoring it.

The myth of free movement in this country is just that? The realities of housing prices, available space, moving and apartment rental (or house buying for the richie richs), and economic forces outside our command often painfully limit our ability to choose where we live, where we can work, and what we can buy and do in utter contrast to what deluded libertarians pretend to believe about how things work.*

Possibilities worth considering include:

Or we could enjoy some freshly buttchugged conjectures instead. That’s cool too.

(1) Blue-state governments are better at doing things than accomplishing things. Blue states’ highly unionized government workers may, for example, deliver public services more noteworthy for their cost than their efficacy.

The fug? Um, if they were just really expensive and didn’t do anything, how would that create all those misleading “facts” about how much heathier, happier, and wealthier the blue states were? Wouldn’t they have even more signs of an impoverished area than even the South as the job-killing power of deluded liberal Keynesian policies did their nasty work?

Do you even know what you are arguing with?

Do you even care?

(2) The taxes necessitated by the blue states’ safety nets are too damn high, a problem especially likely to cause population outflow if people feel they’re paying for crappy but expensive government programs.

I know, I know. Dumb question. And again, how the fuck would this even remotely explain the data we’re seeing? Do you have an answer that isn’t dog-whistle on 11 levels of IT’S ALWAYS PROJECTION?

(3) “If you are poor,” one of Cohn’s experts concludes, “you want to live in a blue state.” But perhaps that depends on whether you envision being poor for as long or as short a time as possible. If it’s the former, a Scandinavian safety net has obvious advantages. If the latter, however, the chief consideration will be opportunities for jobs, new enterprises, and affordable housing. If red states, lightly taxed and regulated, provide more of these opportunities than blue ones, they will attract more people seeking to get out and stay out of poverty.

Apparently not.

But hey, it can be hard understanding the real world when you spend all your days doing the hard work of keeping the world running with your pack of totally deserving 1%ers who never ever just inherited their wealth and prestige by virtue of their parents.

Cause, hey, lots of poor people can just up and leave the state because they are concerned that the loopholes for tax evasion if they ever hit it big will be bigger in another state.

And also again, this would be reflected in more new industries, enterprises, etc… in the red states rather than what we’re seeing now: a modest growth in new businesses by successfully abusing workers to the point that they are competitive with child labor from China.

But hey, why would you need facts in a right-wing journal? Objective reality is for fags and hippies. That’s why anyone who understands numbers must be a secret liberal apostate and destroyed immediately. Only this way will the Volcano God be appeased!

Though he offers no diagnosis of the blue-state exodus, Cohn has a can’t-miss remedy: Keep Americans from voting against his policy agenda with their feet by making sure they have no way to escape it.

That’s one of the dumbest attempts to pull a “no, you see, it’s liberals and people trying to help people who are the real freedom killing monsters” I’ve seen in a long time.

And that’s saying a metric fuck-ton.

You do realize that the spewing bullshit to disguise your agenda trick is supposed to make your position seem less like the deranged rantings of a desperately lying hobo, right?

One of his experts laments that America has not one safety net, but 50. Following the argument to its conclusion, that’s not just too many, but is exactly 49 too many.

Or that the piecemeal system we have in place means that whether you live in a barely first-world nation or a wannabe second or third world nation depending entirely on an accident of birth and circumstances, is a crying shame that fucks over too many people. And maybe we should have an actual fucking safety net in this country.

Giving “states a lot more control over the size and shape of the social welfare state” would mean giving them “the liberty to let a whole class of citizens suffer.” That mustn’t happen. “This country has room for different approaches to policy,” Cohn writes. “It doesn’t have room for different standards of human decency.” There should be room for just one standard, the New Republic standard, codifying the moral advances made over the past century, “from the Progressive era through the New Deal and Great Society.” Cohn does not spell out how much room he would leave for different approaches to policy, or how different those approaches could really be after the one true standard of decency has been honored.

What? Letting people die for no good reason other than they are poor or live in a city or state where they are the collateral damage or intended target of our attempt to destroy an oppressed minority group is the VERY DEFINITION OF STATE’S RIGHTS! And we will fight a second civil war to protect that right against some egghead Northerner being allowed to “help people”.

If we want to drown in the consequences of our hatreds, you have no right to try and save us.

P.S. Please do not interpret this as a call to cut off the federal funding you keep sending us to keep us afloat. That’s totally in the State’s Rights Constitution.

Also, Willy boy? For such a staunch believer in the Tenth Amendment, maybe you should take a gander directly above it sometime at that pesky Ninth one.

People who find that prospect disquieting can take comfort from the knowledge that they’ll be able to relocate anywhere in the country — and take their minds off the national safety net’s ill effects by enjoying a change of scenery or some distinctive regional cuisine. If that doesn’t work, there’s always the option of leaving the country altogether and relocating to a land that has prospered by repudiating Massachusetts’s blue-state model. Spain, perhaps, or Greece.

Because everyone enjoys that right, yeah? All those so-called poor people have a couple of thou just lying around to move and settle cross-country or between countries, right?

Also, can you really end on a smug, modern “why don’t you move to Russia” note when your entire post is a pleading begging bullshit-throwing contest about how the South is so too a juggernaut that could still compete against the North?

How the hell aren’t you being reduced to a laughing stock for such a transparently obvious attempt at shifting the goalposts and declaring yourself the winner?

Oh right.

National Review.

Well, carry on then.

Though perhaps the next time you write a long winding post about how everyone wants to live in red states because that’s where all the breeding is, you might try living there.


‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. Yeah, the dipshit was educated for wingnut welfare in Chicago and now works for a diploma mill in Orange County basically vanity “publishing” his essays and book. Truly a pure demonstration on how the red state’s ability to fuck has made it so very appealing to live in and work. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™

*I say pretend to believe, because for most libertarians, the restriction on free movement and free economic choice is the whole goddamn point, because otherwise they’d have to admit that a pure free market system is the worst one to deliver that and people would be better off with a mixed economy like the Scandanavian countries have.

375 Comments »

  1. Hogeye Grex said,

    October 30, 2012 at 8:15

    Faust?

  2. Babe Ruthless said,

    October 30, 2012 at 8:30

    Couldn’t get past the “image hosted by tripod” spaceholder. Missing image is missing.

  3. bughunter said,

    October 30, 2012 at 8:33

    I’m still glad the last thread’s obit for a two-headed guardian was just a Janus Node randomosity.

  4. Crissa said,

    October 30, 2012 at 9:32

    Did Tripod really sink your image?

    Who uses Tripod anymore?

  5. Babe Ruthless said,

    October 30, 2012 at 9:43

    Tripod is down.

    Also, friends don’t let friends fuck republicans.

    Also, fifst!

  6. Crissa said,

    October 30, 2012 at 9:46

    So, California was in the top five of internal migration, but only when you don’t count net migration? Interesting….

  7. Another Kiwi said,

    October 30, 2012 at 9:50

    Voegli is trying to be all arch here innee? He’s pretending that he’s readin Cohn’s paper like he agrees but really HE DOESN’T! he makes out that Cohn’s own research contains it’s destruction and the real answer is some buggery bollocks that is never explained. I suppose, that in today’s climate of right-wing rabid weasels this should be seen as a nice change but sadly it fails the prime directive: Don’t be a dick.

  8. Enraged Bull Limpet said,

    October 30, 2012 at 9:57

    LAST!

    –Oops, wrong thread. Sorry.

  9. M. Bouffant said,

    October 30, 2012 at 10:16

    Many servers may be under water or powerless. Ha ha ha. Less Internet crap to wade through, then.

    Is Michelle Malkin from a “Balkin” country? Or is just a hesitant nation?

  10. M. Bouffant said,

    October 30, 2012 at 10:17

    Oh, I hate it when pedantry fails. It! IT!

  11. Smut Clyde said,

    October 30, 2012 at 11:09

    I suppose there is an association between “low population growth” and “happy, uncrowded, life-style with adequate resources”. It’s that whole “demographic transition” thing, separating 3rd-world and 1st-world status. Apparently a bad thing now.
    I think we can all agree that giving wimmenz control over their fertility is a bad idea.

  12. Major Kong said,

    October 30, 2012 at 11:09

    If population growth was the key to prosperity Bangladesh would rule the world.

  13. Another Kiwi said,

    October 30, 2012 at 11:12

    Smut should remember that wimmenz can shut that whole getting preggo thing down, anyway.

  14. Smut Clyde said,

    October 30, 2012 at 11:59

    M. Bouffant said,
    October 30, 2012 at 10:17

    HA HA Bouffant’s pedantry fails, the falling motion.

  15. Smut Clyde said,

    October 30, 2012 at 12:53

    For some reason the Red States bring to mind the association between religious fervour and parasite infestation*.
    Personally I blame the lack of government oversight over the Godmeat industry, allowing all manner of infected godmeat to enter the food chain.

    * Physical parasites, as opposed to the mental kind.

  16. Martin said,

    October 30, 2012 at 15:03

    Social Darwinist Paradise can be nothing BUT a compliment imo!

  17. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    October 30, 2012 at 15:24

    One of the problems with Cerb’s posts is they are so damned comprehensive. Even with these delusional poop-filled right-wing screeds that wanders all over the place, Cerb manages to beat down every little thing for the stupid shit that it is. Well anywho, here’s my little bit of kicking at the demolished edifice of their all-wrong-all-the-time worldview:

    But perhaps that depends on whether you envision being poor for as long or as short a time as possible. If it’s the former, a Scandinavian safety net has obvious advantages. If the latter, however, the chief consideration will be opportunities for jobs, new enterprises, and affordable housing. If red states, lightly taxed and regulated, provide more of these opportunities than blue ones, they will attract more people seeking to get out and stay out of poverty.

    It’s been a while so forgive me if I’m doin’ it rong, but (pdf warning) Sadly, No!

    Eight states, primarily in the Mideast and New England regions, have consistently higher upward and lower downward mobility compared to the nation as a whole.

    Nine states, all in the South, have consistently lower upward and higher downward mobility compared to the nation as a whole.

  18. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

    October 30, 2012 at 15:27

    Nine states, all in the South, have consistently lower upward and higher downward mobility compared to the nation as a whole.

    That’s the goal of our plutocracy.
    ~

  19. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    October 30, 2012 at 15:28

    The only other problem with Cerb’s posts is that all the awesome makes me feel bad about not hanging around here as much as I should.

  20. CRA said,

    October 30, 2012 at 15:33

    Jonathan Cohn of The New Republic argues that it’s getting easier, but more alarming, to differentiate Blue from Red America.

    Nevermind his point, I like this construction:
    It’s getting easier, but more alarming, to X

  21. Helmut Monotreme said,

    October 30, 2012 at 15:56

    It’s getting easier, but more alarming, to X

    It’s getting easier but more alarming to canoe in Times Square.
    Yep, it woks.

    It’s the perfect intro for clueless people who notice the train that everyone has been warning them about for a long time is getting really fucking close and standing on the tracking is looking less fun every minute.

  22. Bozo the Cocksucker said,

    October 30, 2012 at 16:08

    Wait, is the Tripod thing not a joke? That’s a thing that happened? Like it’s 2002?

  23. tigris said,

    October 30, 2012 at 16:08

    Did he not even notice how he morphed “growing more slowly” to people “fleeing” in some sort of “blue-state exodus”? I bet I’m healthier and prettier than he is, too.

  24. Bitter Scribe said,

    October 30, 2012 at 16:28

    “Leave the social safety net up to the states” is Wingnut Bullshitese for “throw an inadequate amount of money at them and leave it up to them to sort it out. Or not.”

  25. CRA said,

    October 30, 2012 at 16:36

    “Leave the social safety net up to the states” is Wingnut Bullshitese for “throw an inadequate amount of money at them and leave it up to them to sort it out. Or not.”

    Yup. I find one part of the con especially galling: states are different, see, so naturally they require different solutions to every problem, and who better to know those differences than the locals? … It’s superficially appealing. Choice devolves to you, because you’re super. Don’t look behind the curtain …

    Except sometimes (disaster relief, anyone?) problems aren’t all that local. Sometimes local quirks and knowledge are best as the dressing on a meal served up by specialists not closely associated with Rhode Island. Is heart disease gonna be any fucking different if I move there? Does the hurricane even know what we call this place?

  26. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    October 30, 2012 at 16:46

    Just want to emphasize the unstated MASSIVE GOATSE-LIKE HOLE in Voegli’s argument – that folks are moving to red states for a shot at a better life – or something. That it’s Bumfuck County in the Deep South that is where folks are going to have their breakout careers in whatever.

    You know – the American Dream. Where kids born in LA long for the day they can be discovered and catapulted to the nation’s consciousness in some mid-west farm town. Where bright and ambitious folks leave New York for the Bible Belt, because if they can make it there, they can make it anywhere.

  27. tsam said,

    October 30, 2012 at 17:25

    Well, I propose that we do leave safety nets to the states for a while. Let’s see how the wingnuts respond to what Kansas and Oklahoma and Alabama do about social welfare.

    I think it will be the same as it is now: The affluent hold it up as a shining monument to all that’s great about America, and the victims, starving and doing without basic needs will blame Mexicans, gays, liberals and everyone else for their problems. So I guess we should just do it and put the money into education and infrastructure.

  28. Thread Bear said,

    October 30, 2012 at 17:54

    So, red states that rely on abstinence only education and provide no access to birth control are outbreeding the blue states. Wow, that’s a huge surprise.

  29. Thread Bear said,

    October 30, 2012 at 18:00

    Where kids born in LA long for the day they can be discovered and catapulted to the nation’s consciousness in some mid-west farm town.

    Gonzo: I’m following my dream too, I’m going to Bombay, India to become a movie star.

    Kermit: Gonzo, you don’t go to Bombay to become a movie star. You got to where we’re going, Hollywood!

    Gonzo: Sure, if you want to do it the easy way.

  30. Pupienus said,

    October 30, 2012 at 18:07

    I am astonished to find no allusions to or citations of Idiocracy.

  31. The Absurd Anton Von Leevenhoek said,

    October 30, 2012 at 18:13

    * Physical parasites, as opposed to the mental kind.

    That book freaked me right the fuck out when I read it. I think I was about 10 or 11 though, I should read it again.

  32. The Absurd Anton Von Leevenhoek said,

    October 30, 2012 at 18:17

    Also, too: I haz a confuzed: was Herpicane Serndy a “hurricane,” a “superstorm,” a “megastorm,” or a “frankenstorm”? All the weatherjerks calling it different things is making me unsure of exactly how scareded I’m s’posed to be.

  33. Lurking Canadian said,

    October 30, 2012 at 18:18

    Nine states, all in the South, have consistently lower upward and higher downward mobility compared to the nation as a whole.

    That’s just cheating. Everybody knows facts can be used to prove anything that’s even remotely true.

    The only fair way to argue is to start with your conclusion and work backwards, especially if you drew the conclusion from a holy book, like Leviticus or Atlas Shrugged.

  34. Bitter Scribe said,

    October 30, 2012 at 18:24

    Nine states, all in the South, have consistently lower upward and higher downward mobility compared to the nation as a whole.

    Mobility is socialism.

  35. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    October 30, 2012 at 18:27

    [Nym reset]

    Maybe this guy’s just confused by all the “mobility” language — he thought they were talking about “mobility scooters” and the south totally has way moar free-keep-the-gobmint-outta-my-medicare scooters. Winnars!

  36. Thread Bear said,

    October 30, 2012 at 18:29

    Nine states, all in the South, have consistently lower upward and higher downward mobility compared to the nation as a whole.

    That can’t be true – How, then, do you explain all o’ them there MOBILE homes!!!

  37. Helmut Monotreme said,

    October 30, 2012 at 18:41

    That can’t be true – How, then, do you explain all o’ them there MOBILE homes!!!

    Also everyone in the third biggest city in Alabama that gets out and isn’t a complete shut in, is by definition socially Mobile.

  38. MMM said,

    October 30, 2012 at 18:52

    Speaking as a resident of the Blue State of Washington, I say:
    Ha HA! We win! SUCKAZ!

  39. Pupienus said,

    October 30, 2012 at 18:58

    I don’t care about pollution
    I’m an air-conditioned gypsy
    That’s my solution
    Watch the police and the taxman miss me
    I’m mobile

  40. N__B said,

    October 30, 2012 at 19:03

    The mob be illin’.

  41. bbkf said,

    October 30, 2012 at 19:09

    •Okay, maybe so-called studies have shown that people living in blue states live longer, live healthier, have more money and new industries, are happier, and generally better looking than our conservative paradise red states, but… Um, er, we’re still outbreeding you suckers. Also racist old people retire with us, so fuck science, conservative policies FOREVAH!

    uhhh…i hate to burst cerb’s bubble, but is she NOT aware of the factual information we learned yesterday from one ‘aloha kid’:

    It’s a known fact, conservatives are twice as… shall we say; satisfied and satisfying, therefore happy in life. We’re also healthier and better looking.
    Look it up o’ bitter one.

    i exhort her to bookmark that for future reference…

  42. bbkf said,

    October 30, 2012 at 19:12

    oh, and before i forget come people in nodak aren’t that bright…

  43. bbkf said,

    October 30, 2012 at 19:14

    The one “looks more and more like Scandinavia

    to be fair, around here the people do look and sound like scandahoovia…

  44. bbkf said,

    October 30, 2012 at 19:21

    and flocking to states rendered ghastly dystopias by ignoring it.

    oh my effing bob…my mom and dad retired to lillian al when my dad got sick…they built a big ass house in one of the new developments…their reasoning for going there? a)it’s where her parents retired to and grandpa needed care after grandma died and b)fucking cheap to live because you, know, shit for services = low, low taxes and c)pretty fucking warm

    the downside as they soon discovered was having to rely on volunteer emergency services…with lots of olds moving in who couldn’t physically provide the emergency services…this turned into a clusterfuck movement to incorporate lillian…which went over like a lead balloon…

  45. VCarlson said,

    October 30, 2012 at 19:24

    When bbkf quoted “aloha kid,”

    We’re also healthier and better looking.

    why did I think of this?

  46. bbkf said,

    October 30, 2012 at 19:27

    The only other problem with Cerb’s posts is that all the awesome makes me feel bad about not hanging around here as much as I should.

    sounds like mommy needs to give dkw a spanking…

  47. bbkf said,

    October 30, 2012 at 19:31

    why did I think of this?

    why did i think of geroge tierney from greenville south carolina?

  48. tigris said,

    October 30, 2012 at 19:41

    Why did I think of Cletus on The Simpsons?

  49. Snorghagen said,

    October 30, 2012 at 19:51

    Nine states, all in the South, have consistently lower upward and higher downward mobility compared to the nation as a whole.

    The problem is that we have the wrong attitude toward the concept of ‘downward mobility’. We should think of it as gently sinking down onto a grassy, sunlit meadow – a pleasant place to stretch out and relax where you can enjoy the comforts of deprivation, hardship, and helplessness.

  50. bbkf said,

    October 30, 2012 at 19:53

    Why did I think of Cletus on The Simpsons?

    u r old skool?

  51. N__B said,

    October 30, 2012 at 19:55

    It’s lurve!

  52. Lurking Canadian said,

    October 30, 2012 at 19:56

    a pleasant place to stretch out and relax where you can enjoy the comforts of deprivation, hardship, and helplessness.

    Lucky bastards don’t even have to pay taxes! Just work their twenty-five hours at Walmart, then spend the rest of the week drinking forties and watching TV while trying to stay alive on a diet of Ritz crackers and ramen.

    Not like those hard-working types on Wall Street who are busting their humps for eighty hours a week, earning a piddling $10000/hr, including the time spent drinking whiskey sours at the peeler’s trying to land the big clients. Where is the compassion for them?

  53. VCarlson said,

    October 30, 2012 at 20:05

    Not like those hard-working types on Wall Street who are busting their humps for eighty hours a week, earning a piddling $10000/hr, including the time spent drinking whiskey sours at the peeler’s trying to land the big clients. Where is the compassion for them?

    You forget the soul-killing stress of being referred to as “fatcats” while being given our money and not being held responsible for causing disaster.

  54. Anonymous said,

    October 30, 2012 at 20:05

    Move to Spain or Greece where massive unemployment now exists? Greece whose next most popular business after tourism is tax evasion. What an idjit! Also, he fails to mention that a major factor in red state population increase is Latino immigration (legal and illegal over the last 30 years to service the low-wage, agricultural industries.( in addition to the other reasons you mentioned).

  55. Helmut Monotreme said,

    October 30, 2012 at 20:06

    The problem is that we have the wrong attitude toward the concept of ‘downward mobility’. We should think of it as gently sinking down onto a grassy, sunlit meadow – a pleasant place to stretch out and relax where you can enjoy the comforts of deprivation, hardship, and helplessness.

    I agree. The tea party and the one percent should totally create a permanent underclass of Americans, totally inured to hardship and suffering, unbothered and unfazed by poverty and hunger, able to live off the land wherever they are.

    Once millions of people don’t think twice about sleeping outdoors and eating rats and crickets if they have to, I’m sure they will look at their fellow Americans with only the purest benevolence, and never ever think about improving their lot in life by any other means than education, thrift and hard work.

    Clearly those in such a noble condition of poverty would never look at their fellow Americans with envious eyes and would respect every law of the land from vagrancy and littering ordinances up to those regarding robbery theft and murder.

    What could possibly go wrong?

  56. Suezboo said,

    October 30, 2012 at 20:18

    OK, tippytoeing onto thin ice here.
    I’ve been following this Sandy thing pretty closely and somewhere I read about these Oh Wow! heroes who were guarding the Tomb of the Unknown Warrior all through the terrible weather.
    My question is why? WTF? The tomb has no live people in it and those Brave Soldiers should be off helping live people, IMO.
    I see it as yet another instance of the USA’s military worship which amounts almost to a religion as wide-reaching as Exceptionalism. One cannot say anything against teh sacred troops, not even about their behaviour when abroad, the sexual assault rate on women and gay troops etc. And no-one can suggest cutting the Defence budget or scaling back on the military in any way.I think it’s a really unhealthy and worrying trend in American thought which does not bode well for the US or us furriners.Remember Eisenhower !
    /Ducks and covers.

  57. jamal said,

    October 30, 2012 at 20:20

    Popenführer Benjie ist so prowd of them hillbilly vimens who reproduct zo much. Got in himmel will reward.

  58. vacuumslayer said,

    October 30, 2012 at 20:22

    Power’s back! Woo-hoo! Now I can go back to worrying about the election.

  59. bbkf said,

    October 30, 2012 at 20:24

    OK, tippytoeing onto thin ice here.

    i see those strawberries and cream put you in a fine fettle, young lady! uhhh, no need to tippytoe around here…i think you will find that most will agree with you…i know i do…

  60. bbkf said,

    October 30, 2012 at 20:26

    Power’s back! Woo-hoo! Now I can go back to worrying about the election.

    yay! amazing the things you need power for in’it? and quit worrying about the election…it will be OKAY…any moment now, mitt is going to verbally massacre the bit of surge he has going now and even the most die hard wingnuts are going to NOT go to the polls because even they couldn’t bring themselves to vote for him after THAT…

  61. Suezboo said,

    October 30, 2012 at 20:29

    bbkf, From your lips to G-d’s ear.

  62. vacuumslayer said,

    October 30, 2012 at 20:32

    yay! amazing the things you need power for in’it? and quit worrying about the election…it will be OKAY…any moment now, mitt is going to verbally massacre the bit of surge he has going now and even the most die hard wingnuts are going to NOT go to the polls because even they couldn’t bring themselves to vote for him after THAT…

    As long as Mittens remains white, Obama remains black and the raison detre of every wingnut remains to “stick it to liberals,” they will vote and they will vote in droves. They always do.

    The most dedicated group of voters in this country is also the dumbest and meanest.

    I want to move.

  63. Marion in Savannah said,

    October 30, 2012 at 20:34

    Suezboo said,
    October 30, 2012 at 20:18

    What you said. At least twice, perhaps thrice.

  64. tsam said,

    October 30, 2012 at 20:35

    Speaking as a resident of the Blue State of Washington, I say:
    Ha HA! We win! SUCKAZ!

    From the deep red side of the Blue State of Washington, I ask: What did we win? I’ll call R74 approval a win…if it happens.

  65. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    October 30, 2012 at 20:37

    I thought the best part about the whole soldiers/tomb/rain thing was that the photo that initially went viral was old and not from herpicane serndy. And yeah, no need to tippytoe about such like that ’round these parts as far ask I can tell.

  66. jim the heretical anti-cliff lemming said,

    October 30, 2012 at 20:41

    Yeah, I can troll this:

    jim2011
    a few seconds ago

    Arguing that an area’s lower wages, shorter lifespans & declining
    standards of living are justified by its rising population is an
    interesting approach, but one that lacks something I like to call
    “logic.” By this standard, Africa in the 1980s was a paradise, while
    Scandinavia today is a dystopian hellscape. In the wake of its
    disastrously mismanaged fast-track shift to a Free Market economy,
    Russia today is struggling with the effects of decline in both lifespan & population, but I doubt even the most rabid Freeper would characterize Boris Yeltsin or Vladimir Putin as liberals.

    The thesis that growing population in “Red” states is a vindication of
    their conservativism barely qualifies as low comedy. Warm weather
    year-round in southern “Red” states + demographics dictating ever more
    seniors = those states will continue to see growth. Note too that the
    epic “exodus” cited is a canard: in reality, American mobility is now
    historically low, & has been declining for many years.

    The post conveniently omits to mention that low taxes in GOP states are
    kept low by the simple expedient of fiscal parasitism at the expense of
    Democratic states – & it’s very interesting indeed that there’s been
    a roaring silence on the Right concerning the yearly fortune in taxes
    that “Blue” states pay to subsidize “Red” ones.

    Also omitted is the fact that the majority of population growth in America
    is among minorities – who tend to vote Democratic … a trend that’s
    quickly turning “Red” states into “Purple” ones & threatens to exile
    the GOP from national power for good unless it finds a functional
    replacement for its increasingly obsolete Southern Strategy & learns
    to adapt so as to serve those minorities’ needs.

    For “serve those minorities’ needs,” read “make it impossible for melanin-enriched Americans to vote.” This cunning plan is guaranteed to work & cannot possibly go wrnog!

    *crosses fingers, hopes fucked up paragraph/line formatting is limited to preview*

  67. tsam said,

    October 30, 2012 at 20:42

    OK, tippytoeing onto thin ice here.

    Nah, I don’t think so. I get your point about endangering the lives of military personnel by having them stand in a huge storm and guard a commemorative rock. It does speak to the silly degree to which we romanticize the military and all the goofy traditions and ceremony attached to it. But then we romanticize bikers and gangsters and old west outlaws and depression era bank robbers and serial killers, so…go figure.

  68. bbkf said,

    October 30, 2012 at 20:42

    The most dedicated group of voters in this country is also the dumbest and meanest.

    i know…but hang in there dearest girl…you too, suezboo…i like to think that a lot of those undecideds will do the right thing…but then again, i’m cranked up on zoloft…

  69. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    October 30, 2012 at 20:46

    i like to think that a lot of those undecideds will do the right thing

    I have never been able to understand how anybody is an “undecided” voter. I think you have to actually be really, really trying to be that pigfucking ignorant at this point.

  70. Substance McGravitas said,

    October 30, 2012 at 20:50

    I have never been able to understand how anybody is an “undecided” voter. I think you have to actually be really, really trying to be that pigfucking ignorant at this point.

    Voter turnout might get over 60% this time!

  71. bbkf said,

    October 30, 2012 at 20:50

    I think you have to actually be really, really trying to be that pigfucking ignorant at this point.

    or like hubbkf and just trying to mindfuck people…also, too, i think there’s a certain amount of lesser of two evils going on with them…but definitely a healthy does of pigignorance…

  72. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:04

    To clarify: I have no such hope that those ignorant pigfuckers are even capable of “doing the right thing” — but I’m a cynical bastard.

  73. 'natch said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:05

    omg bamz is saying socialist stuff on teevee

  74. Smut Clyde said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:11

    The one “looks more and more like Scandinavia

    Does that include the ladies playing topless netball in the park? AFAF.

  75. Pupienus said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:13

    I hate Mara Eliason with passion of several supernovae. This morning she said that Rmoney’s continued upside down approval indicates that they haven’t successfully countered the Obama campaign’s attack ads. Fuck you, you fucking fuck. Right – nobody has an opinion they did not receive. Thanks for showing us what regard you hold for us st00pid non-villagers. ESADIAF please, post fucking haste. And fuck NPR for their cowardly, weaseling fail at journalism. Goddamn I despise those sniveling, arrogant shitwads.

  76. Pupienus said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:15

    And by “regard” I mean “contempt.” But you knew that.

  77. bbkf said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:16

    To clarify: I have no such hope that those ignorant pigfuckers are even capable of “doing the right thing” — but I’m a cynical bastard.

    fwiw…

  78. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:19

    fwiw…

    That person is an inane wanker.

  79. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:21

    Voter turnout might get over 60% this time!

    I hear the other 40% are gonna magically appear and all vote for Jill Stein then no brown foreign people will ever be killed again and it will be unicorns and sparkleponies for everyone!

    It’s gonna be awesome.

  80. bbkf said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:22

    I hate Mara Eliason with passion of several supernovae

    i was digging the HELL out of kerri miller this morning…she was pretty much, ‘eh…you didn’t answer the question’ and ‘how is that hard to give an honest answer to?’ she was interviewing congressman paulson and opponent brian barnes from mn’s fighting 3rd…i think candy crowley gave some interviewers some balls!

  81. bbkf said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:22

    That person is an inane wanker.

    damn…have a beer…beer and tranqs…is there nothing they can’t fix?

  82. vacuumslayer said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:25

    All’s i know is looking forward to my wine this evening.

  83. vacuumslayer said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:26

    WHICH I WILL *NOT* BE BUTTCHUGGING. I savor my Riunite Peach.

  84. bbkf said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:28

    WHICH I WILL *NOT* BE BUTTCHUGGING. I savor my Riunite Peach.

    haha…peaches and herb…i am leaving the office now to go to lovely detroit lakes mn for hubbk’s station’s ‘fall preview’…how exciting, eh?!?

  85. vacuumslayer said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:29

    Well, what is does the “Fall Preview” entail?

    PS–Given “Nashville” a try yet?

  86. tigris said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:40

    Also omitted is the fact that the majority of population growth in America
    is among minorities – who tend to vote Democratic … a trend that’s
    quickly turning “Red” states into “Purple”

    Also that internal migration from blue states to red ones is usually to blue cities.

  87. Pupienus said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:40

    Hey – I have been to Detroit Lakes. Don’t remember a damn thing about it.

  88. Bitter Scribe said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:43

    I have never been able to understand how anybody is an “undecided” voter. I think you have to actually be really, really trying to be that pigfucking ignorant at this point.

    Didn’t a movie come out a year or two ago starring Kevin Costner, or someone equally lame, as not only the last undecided voter in America, but the one whose vote would decide the presidential election? For some strange reason it sank into such instant obscurity that I can’t even remember the name.

  89. tigris said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:43

    I have never been able to understand how anybody is an “undecided” voter. I think you have to actually be really, really trying to be that pigfucking ignorant at this point.

    You know, I can actually imagine some poor single parent working a couple jobs who’s just too busy to pay any real attention, who maybe has friends and family on both sides so is hearing stuff that can’t easily be reconciled.

  90. Pupienus said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:44

    vs – they have clips of the upcoming PBS shows, that’s all. Teh Ho will prolly bring the DVD home – I can give you a review if you like or you can just wait until your station puts their promos together. If your station is worth diddly, they will send you a promo e-mail/flyer/thing. You ARE a member, yes?

  91. Another Kiwi said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:51

    Re the soljers guarding the tomb. They have said that the don’t put the guards at risk and have ways to keep guard without getting kilt. There was a picture going around of them in pouring rain but it was taken in September on a normal sort of day.
    Not to say that I don’t agree about the over militarisation of your society, it is unhealthy. We are not so much in NZ but there is a subset of or society who would just lurve them some armee.

  92. Marion in Savannah said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:51

    it sank into such instant obscurity that I can’t even remember the name

    Teh Great Gazoogle whispered in my ear that it might be “Swing Vote.” I recall the ads on the teebee and they were horrendous.

  93. Substance McGravitas said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:52

    They have said that the don’t put the guards at risk and have ways to keep guard without getting kilt.

    Of course. Lasers.

  94. bughunter said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:54

    TFQ from Cohn’s TNR article:

    The result of this divergence is that one half of the country looks more and more like Scandinavia, while the other increasingly resembles a social Darwinist’s paradise.

    Translated: Blue states look more like 1st world European democracies, while Red States look more like 3rd world kleptocracies.

    In just about every way, the conservative states resemble third world nations: they’re predominantly agricultural and mineral extraction economies, they have large populations of people in poverty, high birth rates, high infant mortality rates, high violent crime rates, the largest concentrations of wealth and the most corruption.

    But somehow, according to Voegeli, the high birth rates make red states superior, to the exclusion of all the other qualities.

  95. Another Kiwi said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:54

    Ever heard of seals? Yeah baby! And they work for herrings

  96. tsam said,

    October 30, 2012 at 21:57

    Most people are as attentive to politics as we are. I’m always tempted to look down my nose at them, but they sure seem happier to me. The unfortunate thing about is that the right wing shit machine has invaded that oblivious space. You ask 100 people what they think about the deficit, and I think 20 of them would have no idea what the deficit is, 20 of them would give a simple explanation of Keynesian economics and advise us not panic about it just yet, and 58 would wring their hands and regurgitate the concern trolling that they keep hearing every time a Democrat gets into office. The remaining 2 will answer pie and be punched in the grill by the nearest short tempered asshole.

  97. tsam said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:01

    In just about every way, the conservative states resemble third world nations

    Don’t forget camo clothing, long and gross beards, a dialect of the language that reveals them to be simpletons, kitchens full of open-and-eat food, extra Walmarts, false bravado, and an overinflated sense of self worth that compensates for being unable to come to terms with the fact that they suck at life.

  98. tsam said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:02

    Most people are NOT, btw. I meant not. Obummer is in are base fuckin with our speechez

  99. tsam said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:02

    Red State: Honey Boo Boo.

    CHECKMATE.

  100. vs only buttchugs classy wines like Riunite Peach said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:08

    To be fair, Honey Boo Boo supports Obama.

    Pup, I am not. I should remedy that, huh?

  101. Denis said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:09

    Most people are as attentive to politics as we are. I’m always tempted to look down my nose at them, but they sure seem happier to me. The unfortunate thing about is that the right wing shit machine has invaded that oblivious space. You ask 100 people what they think about the deficit, and I think 20 of them would have no idea what the deficit is, 20 of them would give a simple explanation of Keynesian economics and advise us not panic about it just yet, and 58 would wring their hands and regurgitate the concern trolling that they keep hearing every time a Democrat gets into office. The remaining 2 will answer pie and be punched in the grill by the nearest short tempered asshole.

    Here we go with the Jesusland whining again like we saw from the unhinged Left back in 2004.

    tsam sounds like he wants to slit somebody’s throat.

  102. tsam said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:09

    I kinda do. Where you at, Pennis?

  103. tsam said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:10

    Good lord–did I just make an overt threat on a snark blog?

  104. Bitter Scribe said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:10

    tsam sounds like he wants to slit somebody’s throat.

    Can he start with yours?

  105. tsam said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:16

    Honey Boo Boo supports Obama.

    I think she supports the junk food industry.

  106. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:18

    You know, I can actually imagine some poor single parent working a couple jobs who’s just too busy to pay any real attention, who maybe has friends and family on both sides so is hearing stuff that can’t easily be reconciled.

    If they are too busy to pay attention and getting conflicting messages they probably just won’t vote.

  107. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:20

    It can’t be coincidence that the troll shows up right after the mention of “ignorant pigfuckers.” It probably has a google alert setup.

  108. Bitter Scribe said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:21

    I think the real problem with indecision comes at the bottom of the ballot, not the top. I’m cranked enough about politics to waste half my life on this board, but even I consider myself informed only down to the state rep level. Once you start talking judges and county board members, it’s good night nurse. Even if you set out to inform yourself, info is not easy to come by.

  109. bughunter said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:35

    an overinflated sense of self worth that compensates for being unable to come to terms with the fact that they suck at life

    No, USian red states seem to have that all to themselves. Most real third world natives I’ve met tend to be quite humble. Except for the kleptocrats themselves, but then I’ve met fewer of those.

    Faux Nooze has convinced the US third world state residents that they’re elite, when in reality they’re serfs. In real third world countries, the serfs know they’re serfs.

  110. Pupienus said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:37

    Nate Silver tweets:

    Nate Silver @fivethirtyeight

    CAN’T BELIEVE METOROLOGISTS USED MATH AND SCIENCE TO PREDICT THIS STORM. THEY MUST BE MAGIC WIZARDS.

  111. jim the heretical anti-cliff lemming said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:39

    facepalm.jpg

  112. Pupienus said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:39

    Pup, I am not.

    YOU ARE DEAD TO ME.

  113. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:44

    I think the real problem with indecision comes at the bottom of the ballot, not the top. I’m cranked enough about politics to waste half my life on this board, but even I consider myself informed only down to the state rep level. Once you start talking judges and county board members, it’s good night nurse. Even if you set out to inform yourself, info is not easy to come by.

    Here in Oregon we do all our voting by mail (I voted a week ago), one of the nicest things about this is that you can take your time, sit down on the couch with a beer, your ballot, and the voter’s pamphlet and learn all about the various measures and candidates. And you can grab the laptop if you need more info.

    Our voter’s pamphlet also includes “arguments in support” and “arguments in opposition” — essentially small paid blurbs — for each candidate and measure. Handily they also print who paid for them. That may be the most helpful thing in deciding some of the more obscure stuff — if ranching and mining groups love a measure and environmentalists and teachers unions hate it you get an idea of what’s up.

  114. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:48

    CAN’T BELIEVE METOROLOGISTS USED MATH AND SCIENCE TO PREDICT THIS STORM. THEY MUST BE MAGIC WIZARDS.

    Little effeminate Jewish magic wizards even!

  115. Smut Clyde said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:49

    Oh this giant ass whistle in my hand?

    This is what butt-chugging leads to.

  116. Bitter Scribe said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:49

    Here in Oregon we do all our voting by mail

    I’m jealous. Illinois has early voting but there’ll still be a line, probably.

  117. Pryme said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:51

    facepalm.jpg

    Oh the delicious double-irony: The man who failed to act criticizing a president who’s decided not to wait until drowning people are crying for help on a news broadcast, and the fact that this man worked for a president who’s entire foreign policy can be summed up as, “Fire! Aim..Ready?”

    Garfield (the cat) was right.

  118. vs only buttchugs classy wines like Riunite Peach said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:56

    Dear Non-Existent Lord,

    Please help me to be strong and resist the temptation of the slutty Halloween candy, sitting here before me.

    I need to save some for the children.

  119. tigris said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:58

    We go out to eat on Halloween. Then buy sale candy.

  120. vs only buttchugs classy wines like Riunite Peach said,

    October 30, 2012 at 22:59

    YOU ARE DEAD TO ME.

    Dude. I am not worried. If I get desperate, I can always whip out some food talk or some nice man-candy. I CAN WIN YOU BACK.

  121. Bitter Scribe said,

    October 30, 2012 at 23:01

    We go out to eat on Halloween.

    Just be careful if you drive. We did last year and I goddamn near hit a bunch of trick-or-treaters who dashed in front of my car, on a four-lane highway. Whatever candy was on the other side, I sure hope it was worth it.

  122. Bitter Scribe said,

    October 30, 2012 at 23:02

    I refuse to look up that story about Brownie. If someone sought him out and asked for comment, that’s one thing. If he just piped up because he thought we needed his Voice of Experience…

  123. tigris said,

    October 30, 2012 at 23:02

    Yeah, there are kids everywhere here. Apparently it’s not contagious, though.

  124. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    October 30, 2012 at 23:03

    Garfield (the cat) was right.

    I’ll have to trust you on that — Garfield is way better without Garfield

  125. Substance McGravitas said,

    October 30, 2012 at 23:03

    I need to save some for the children.

    Just accept the trick.

  126. vs only buttchugs classy wines like Riunite Peach said,

    October 30, 2012 at 23:05

    Just accept the trick.

    Ooh. I could go for a little song and dance. Some softshoe…

  127. tsam said,

    October 30, 2012 at 23:10

    <em?Here in Oregon we do all our voting by mail (I voted a week ago), one of the nicest things about this is that you can take your time, sit down on the couch with a beer, your ballot, and the voter’s pamphlet and learn all about the various measures and candidates. And you can grab the laptop if you need more info.

    US TOO! Vote by mail RULES.

    Also, gay marriage is on our ballot by referendum (we COULD be the first state to approve it by popular vote, since the hatemongers have been relatively quiet this time), and legalizing marijuana (to a sort of complicated but useful degree) is also up for referendum.

    This could be awesome as fuck. Or disappointing as fuck.

    Washington, however, does a pretty lousy job of phrasing the ballot initiatives on the actual ballot. They also do a crappy job of writing the pamplet, though they do list supporters on each side of initiatives, so in most cases it’s pretty easy to tell if you’re looking down the barrel of another Eyman fuckjob.

    For those that don’t know, Tim Eyman is the very epitome of a loudmouthed tax rebel teabagger. He started with an initiative to wipe out taxes on vehicle licensing–the annual renewals. Then he started a PAC, then he got caught using money from his PAC to buy himself some righteous gear.

  128. Bitter Scribe said,

    October 30, 2012 at 23:10

    Just accept the trick.

    Just please don’t be one of those people who responds to “Trick or treat?” with “Where’s the trick? I’ll take the trick!” My sister does this to little kids all the time and thinks it’s so clever. They hate her for it.

  129. tsam said,

    October 30, 2012 at 23:14

    They hate her for it.

    The toilet paper and egg industries love her for it, though.

  130. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    October 30, 2012 at 23:14

    slutty Halloween candy

    I’m disappointed that there isn’t any good slutty candy for me — I mean you and Pup get “Big Hunk” and “Sugar Daddy” and WTF do I get?

    No, “Bit-O-Honey” does not count.

  131. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    October 30, 2012 at 23:19

    … legalizing marijuana (to a sort of complicated but useful degree) is also up for referendum.

    This could be awesome as fuck. Or disappointing as fuck.

    Here also. Too. There hasn’t been any (that I’ve seen) of the “OMG that scary marry wanna turns kids into gay heroin addicted homeless people” tv ads that were all over the place last time full legalization came up for vote. Could be that people are more accepting of the possibility now that we’ve had medical use for a while and the world hasn’t ended. We’ll see.

  132. Substance McGravitas said,

    October 30, 2012 at 23:20

    Don’t want Big Turk? Or Collon?

  133. Bitter Scribe said,

    October 30, 2012 at 23:20

    I’m disappointed that there isn’t any good slutty candy for me — I mean you and Pup get “Big Hunk” and “Sugar Daddy” and WTF do I get?

    Hershey’s Kisses?
    Kit-Kats?

  134. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    October 30, 2012 at 23:21

    Oh, and be careful — if you mess around too much with slutty candy you’ll end up with Sour Patch Kids.

  135. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    October 30, 2012 at 23:23

    Hershey’s Kisses?

    Gramma kisses are NOT sexay!

    Kit-Kats?

    See, even the furries get their own slutty candy!

  136. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    October 30, 2012 at 23:24

    Ah, thankfully teh wackypedia is relevant to multiple topics as usual.

  137. tigris said,

    October 30, 2012 at 23:28

    Sweet Tarts.

  138. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    October 30, 2012 at 23:29

    Sweet Tarts.

    !!!

    I’ll be in my bunk.

  139. tsam said,

    October 30, 2012 at 23:34

    Here also. Too. There hasn’t been any (that I’ve seen) of the “OMG that scary marry wanna turns kids into gay heroin addicted homeless people” tv ads that were all over the place last time full legalization came up for vote. Could be that people are more accepting of the possibility now that we’ve had medical use for a while and the world hasn’t ended. We’ll see.

    Same here. It’s quiet. TOO quiet.

    There are some commercials that contend that you can vote down gay marriage and not be anti-gay. Like saying you don’t support the Voting Rights Act and aren’t anti-black…

  140. Pupienus said,

    October 30, 2012 at 23:36

    Fuckbum is not candy.

  141. Pupienus said,

    October 30, 2012 at 23:38

    Heh. Clackamas county 404 page. Don’t tell what’s his name, our one time cryptozoologist.

  142. Oregon Beer Snob said,

    October 30, 2012 at 23:43

    Don’t tell what’s his name, our one time cryptozoologist.

    HTTP Status 404 ISREAL!

    Think of all the good error pages we could come up with for “Status 417: Expectation Failed”

  143. Smut Clyde said,

    October 30, 2012 at 23:48

    Error 404 – You’re looking for something that may not exist.

    Inquiring minds are wondering what Pupienus was searching for. “Tasteful Hallowe’en Costumes”?

  144. vacuumslayer said,

    October 31, 2012 at 0:11

    Have you guys seen what Chris Christie said about the Prez and Romney? There are Romney campaign staffers who are committing suicide was we speak.

  145. Another Kiwi said,

    October 31, 2012 at 0:19

    When Christie gives you the full-body smash, you stay smashed.

  146. Spearhafoc, who waits dreaming in his house at R'lyeh said,

    October 31, 2012 at 0:24

    So, Disney bought Star Wars. Huh.

  147. Another Kiwi said,

    October 31, 2012 at 0:27

    The best bit is watching the Fux Friends people’s little souls shrivel even more as Christie says it.

  148. N__B said,

    October 31, 2012 at 0:31

    I was worried yesterday that Christie might break loose from his moorings and smash half the coast.

  149. Pupienus said,

    October 31, 2012 at 0:31

    When Christie gives you the full-body smash, you are pancaked. Flatter than a chewing gum wrapper. 2d’ed. Sent to Flatland. Tunred into veneer under a toxic waste dump. One thin wafer.

  150. Pupienus said,

    October 31, 2012 at 0:32

    There’s going to be another Star Wars film.

    NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

  151. Substance McGravitas said,

    October 31, 2012 at 0:40

    It now occurs to me that Jar-Jar Binks is a great Hallowe’en costume.

  152. Another Kiwi said,

    October 31, 2012 at 0:41

    Relax Pup, they are promising to have Leia in a slave girl costume at least once in every movie.

  153. Spearhafoc, who waits dreaming in his house at R'lyeh said,

    October 31, 2012 at 0:47

    Lucas is only on as a “creative consultant” and not the director or writer, leaving the possibility that it might not completely suck. I’m not saying it won’t be terrible, but there’s now a chance it could be good to watchable. Disney has certainly made decent movies more recently than LucasFilm has.

    There also might be a chance that the first theatrical versions of the original trilogy might get proper DVD releases. Who knows?

  154. Smut Clyde said,

    October 31, 2012 at 0:50

    There’s going to be another Star Wars film.

    One every few years! The Franchise Strikes Back! What fun!

  155. Smut Clyde said,

    October 31, 2012 at 0:51

    watching the Fux Friends people’s little souls shrivel

    OK class, which logical error has AK committed here?

  156. kg said,

    October 31, 2012 at 0:52

    Relax Pup, they are promising to have Leia in a slave girl costume at least once in every movie.

    uhmm…

  157. Spearhafoc, who waits dreaming in his house at R'lyeh said,

    October 31, 2012 at 0:52

    Man, I’m talking like I’m some sort of Star Wars fan. I don’t care as much as I may have seemed to in my last post.

    Doctor Who 4evar!

  158. Smut Clyde said,

    October 31, 2012 at 0:52

    Yeah, there are kids everywhere here. Apparently it’s not contagious, though.

    You and partner should avoid them anyway, just in case.

  159. Smut Clyde said,

    October 31, 2012 at 0:53

    Doctor Who 4evar!
    Now there’s some IP for Disney to buy….

  160. Another Kiwi said,

    October 31, 2012 at 0:58

    uhmm Pup’s checking her costume. His is better.

  161. tigris said,

    October 31, 2012 at 1:06

    It now occurs to me that Jar-Jar Binks is a great Hallowe’en costume. animated special. WITH EWOKS.

    You and partner should avoid them anyway, just in case.

    Oh, we do. Like the mewling, pullulating plague.

  162. tigris said,

    October 31, 2012 at 1:09

    Now there’s some IP for Disney to buy….

    CTHULHURELLA!

  163. bughunter said,

    October 31, 2012 at 1:14

    I would like to buy Joseph O’Shaughnessy of Downers Grove, Illinois a beer.

    Polls are extremely difficult to analyze.

    You need a Ph.D. in statistics, a knowledge of the political spectrum, a clear sense of when someone is lying to you.

    You need an understanding of why the very people who are determined to keep groups of cells alive have no hesitation about killing large numbers of living adults for scarcely any reason at all.

    You need to know why a man who lies to the public on a national stage should be tied with a man who has shown a tendency not only to be honest but far too trusting of other politicians.

    You need to know why people vote for people who think that the rich are abused but the homeless and unemployed are pampered.

    You need to know why some vote for people who would deny assistance for the veterans whom they voted to send to war.

    You would like to know where huge amounts of money are found to elect someone who thinks that the world was created 6,000 years ago. And you’d like to know…what does that rich political supporter expect of a troglodyte in return?

    You need to know why someone in a religion thinks that if the government does not incorporate their theological viewpoint into legislation that they are somehow being persecuted by government. .

    You need to know how people can daily watch greed and apathy and bigotry and ignorance and then vote for it on one lone day in November.

    Actually, now that I think of it, polls are easy. People are difficult.

    This comment is in response to today’s Krugman post.

  164. Spearhafoc, who waits dreaming in his house at R'lyeh said,

    October 31, 2012 at 1:21

    The copyright issues surrounding Lovecraft’s creations are muddled. Cthulhu et al. are effectively public domain but there could still potentially be lawsuits surrounding ownership.

  165. Occupy Avians said,

    October 31, 2012 at 2:22

    Damn you, M. Bouffant, for being FRIST! to point out that Balkin’ Country pedantry.

    What would Malkin be Balkin’ At? Not at dressing up in a faux cheerleader outfit to taunt libs w/ her stiff dancing and cheering skills.

    Not at Stalkin’ (Malkin Balkin’) liberal children who dare to question American exceptionalism and suggesting they be retroactively aborted and/or starved.

    Not at torturing “towel heads” or rounding up Japanese for concentration camps in WW II in the name of safety.

    I guess Malkin would be Balkin’ at the prospect of an America where old people had a social safety net and didn’t have to eat pet food or scavenge for food out of trash cans. As would our distinguished friends (including Obama) who endorse the goals of Simpson-Bowels.

  166. VCarlson said,

    October 31, 2012 at 3:01

    There also might be a chance that the first theatrical versions of the original trilogy might get proper DVD releases. Who knows?

    I heard a presentation wherein someone with far too much time to devote to the subject informed us that Lucas tweaked each and every release* of the SW movies (back when there were only 3).

    *Theatrical release, commercial tape, consumer tape, boxed set …

  167. Major Kong said,

    October 31, 2012 at 3:07

    Well, that was a fun 9- hour drive to Memphis. At least the weather improved once I got out if Ohio.

  168. Pupienus said,

    October 31, 2012 at 3:52

    Vie the Dutch version of The Onion: Romney, campaigning in the wake of megastorm Sandy, “Are you better off than you were four years ago?”

  169. ckc (not kc) said,

    October 31, 2012 at 4:01

    …can’t have too many goobers. (How the heck does this damn condom go on, anyway?!)

  170. ckc (not kc) said,

    October 31, 2012 at 4:16

    ps ..very disappointed – no Dr. Seuss

  171. tensor said,

    October 31, 2012 at 4:38

    It is “difficult,” writes Cohn, “to find any indicator of well-being in which red states consistently do better than blue states.” Because his article doesn’t mention the demographically stagnating blue states and burgeoning red ones…

    Other folks have pointed out this is very strange “logic,” and it would be, even if it was true. Growth rates of 5.9% (or even MA’s 3.1%) are hardly “stagnating,” especially when they occur amongst the wealthiest and best-educated segments of our national population.

    Also, Mr. Voegeli Mendacity conveniently does not quote the actual title of the original article, for some strange reason:

    Blue States are from Scandinavia, Red States are from Guatemala

    Ouch! That will leave a mark!

  172. Smut Clyde said,

    October 31, 2012 at 4:44

    Has Jonah Goldberg written any columns yet advising New Yorkers to evolve gills?

  173. tensor said,

    October 31, 2012 at 5:26

    Loadberg was too busy walking his dog fleeing in abject terror from the very thought of volunteering to go fight in the wars he advocated to ask his readers to write something and send it to him.

  174. Pupienus said,

    October 31, 2012 at 7:02

    Has Jonah Goldberg written any columns

    The data is highly equivocated.

  175. Smut Clyde said,

    October 31, 2012 at 7:07

    Vote Zomney! (stoled from Mick Farren).

  176. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    October 31, 2012 at 8:24

    Relax Pup, they are promising to have Leia in a slave girl costume at least once in every movie.

    Uh, you should know that’s not Pup’s bag by now, old chum!

  177. Another Kiwi said,

    October 31, 2012 at 9:01

    THAT’S the joke.

  178. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

    October 31, 2012 at 11:45

    A killing joke.
    ~

  179. Another Kiwi said,

    October 31, 2012 at 12:26

    Some of that Jaz

  180. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

    October 31, 2012 at 12:28

    I woke up at 5 AM and couldn’t go back to sleep.
    ~

  181. Thread Bear said,

    October 31, 2012 at 12:48

    My mother who’s been a lifelong Republican has been muttering this whole election cycle “I don’t know why anyone would vote for Romney.” Well, I think I figured it out this morning. My current schedule has me coming in to work obscenely early in the morning. The plus side is there’s very little traffic. So this morning, driving along a stretch of four lane road I had a car come up behind me and get right on my back bumper and stay there for several miles. There ware no other cars around and he had a whole other lane to use to go around me, but he just rode along maybe two feet off my backside. Naturally, I thought to myself “this guy’s a real dick!” Eventually he did pull into the passing lane and go around me. As he did so I saw that lettering across his rear window proclaimed that “Romney Rulz”. Right then and there I came to the conclusion that people vote for Romney because they are real dicks.

  182. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    October 31, 2012 at 14:02

    Happy Hallowe’en Sadlies! I hope your cosplay holiday is filled with the slutty versions of stereotypical dress and that the guys wearing them remembered to wax their backs.

  183. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    October 31, 2012 at 14:07

    TB,

    What I do when being tailgated is slow down. If someone is following you at an unsafe distance, reducing your speed is the only sensible thing to do.

  184. vacuumslayer said,

    October 31, 2012 at 14:13

    As he did so I saw that lettering across his rear window proclaimed that “Romney Rulz”. Right then and there I came to the conclusion that people vote for Romney because they are real dicks.

    I’d say they’re more like dildos, since some real dicks are actually kinda neat.

  185. vacuumslayer said,

    October 31, 2012 at 14:14

    HAPPY HALLOWEEN, EVERYBODY!

  186. CRA said,

    October 31, 2012 at 14:46

    “What I do when being tailgated is slow down. If someone is following you at an unsafe distance, reducing your speed is the only sensible thing to do.”

    The problem with speeding up to increase the gap is that either the tailgater will speed up as well, or another asshole will merge into your lane to close the gap you’ve opened.

    All this is even more inexplicable when you consider that nearly everyone has been party to a rear-ender type accident. They learn nothing?! I wish they’d suck on a tailpipe.

  187. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    October 31, 2012 at 15:30

    I suspect that most tailgaters honestly don’t realize what they are doing. When you get pulled over for speeding, the first question is “Do you realize how fast you were going?” It’s a real question because most people actually don’t know.

    Driving divorces you so far from reality – being in a little box hurtling 100 km/hr with so little sensation of actual movement. And even with the worst drivers, the vast majority of the time they get to where they are going without incident. It’s eerie and totally conducive to irrational behaviour.

    I learned to drive with a two second following distance – although due to the unrealness of driving that has been creeping lower and lower over time. I mean, I haven’t hit anyone yet – so one second should be ample!

    Anyways, that distance gets increased by up to a second if the guy in front of me is a lane-weaving tailgater. Same with the guy behind. Equivalent to the adjustment I make for bad weather.

  188. Major Kong said,

    October 31, 2012 at 15:31

    My car has a very bright rear foglight. I find it makes a great tailgater harassment device.

  189. Major Kong said,

    October 31, 2012 at 15:38

    Mind you if I’m driving my “airport car”, a rusty 94 Buick Roadmaster, I just dare them to hit me.

  190. Bitter Scribe said,

    October 31, 2012 at 16:14

    I blame NASCAR. It seems like half the drivers out there consider themselves race-car drivers and think their balls will drop off if they let you in front of them.

  191. Thread Bear said,

    October 31, 2012 at 16:19

    Binders Full of Women

  192. CRA said,

    October 31, 2012 at 16:45

    Driving divorces you so far from reality [...] It’s eerie and totally conducive to irrational behaviour.

    Right, but on the plus side, the unreality seems to help me to stay calm and video-gamey as surprises unfold. I’ve been able to react quickly and appropriately in cases where fear and panic would be warranted. 30 seconds later I realize I could’ve been killed, and begin to feel something.

    I remember spinning out of control on a slick mountain road: finally the car stalled in the wrong lane, facing the wrong way, on a blind hairpin turn, on the edge of a cliff. But that’s a good outcome.

  193. Origami Isopod said,

    October 31, 2012 at 17:16

    World’s Shittiest Website: “Sandy Leads to Surge in Unscientific Hurricane Profiteers.” Can’t click through right now, happily. Maybe the nanny filter at work has some taste after all.

  194. vacuumslayer said,

    October 31, 2012 at 17:24

    I’m in a good mood. You couldn’t pay me to click to NRO right now.

  195. Bitter Scribe said,

    October 31, 2012 at 17:28

    I remember spinning out of control on a slick mountain road: finally the car stalled in the wrong lane, facing the wrong way, on a blind hairpin turn, on the edge of a cliff. But that’s a good outcome.

    Once I lost control of my car on a snow-slick two-lane highway and it started to drift into the path of an oncoming semi. As I fought to get back into my lane, I remembered that the week before, I had written a news brief for the little rag I worked for at the time about a fatal accident at that exact spot.

    I remember calmly thinking, “I wonder if anyone at the funeral will realize the irony.” The next instant I had the car under control and back on my side of the road. I didn’t feel really scared until I got home.

  196. CRA said,

    October 31, 2012 at 17:49

    World’s Shittiest Website: “Sandy Leads to Surge in Unscientific Hurricane Profiteers.”

    Related at Regretsy: Healing through tragicrafting: Hurricane Sandy edition

  197. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 18:01

    found this amusing…

  198. Pupienus said,

    October 31, 2012 at 18:03

    I don’t know the twit Romney spox on NPR this morning but he’s pretty funny. “They put together a 16 page glossy brochure. Romney has a 59 point plan he bioled down to 5 points. 16 page glossy thing doesn’t mean squat compared to a 59 point plan.

    The host plays a clip of Obama berating Rmoney for not mentioning the vets or or armed servicecritters during the foreign policy debate. Rmoney toady: “That’s a cheap shot. He’s had the opportunity to be CinC but when he was running four years ago there were questions about his CinC chops. It’s unfair of him to be so partisan about it!”

    *Sentences inside quotation marks are paraphrased by me. I am aware of all Internet traditions.

  199. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 18:09

    East-coasters are SOCIALISTS regardless of party affiliation. No one in California has ever shut down their business and demanded a government handout when an earthquake or tsunami was on the way.

    The east coast expects their government handouts every few months (with increasing frequency) now. The east coast loves its coal-fired electricity-powered iShit. Reap. The. Whirlwind.

  200. Spooky Beer Snob said,

    October 31, 2012 at 18:17

    Moar info about the Star Wars travesty.

  201. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 18:21

    <i.Well, what is does the “Fall Preview” entail?

    PS–Given “Nashville” a try yet?

    ooooh…it was verra verra excitin’…we watched some clips from their local productions about state parks, some upcoming subjects of their local production ‘postcards’ and the grand finale was their mini-documentary on we-fest…which is a pretty big deal…hubbkf won two three-day passes for which he is incredibly pumped because he has developed an inexplicable crush on hairy underwear (carrie underwood) and her song ‘blown away’…

    i have to admit that i haven’t checked out nashville yet…times, channel, etc. plz?

  202. CRA said,

    October 31, 2012 at 18:22

    No one in California has ever shut down their business and demanded a government handout when an earthquake or tsunami was on the way.

    “An earthquake warning system is a system of accelerometers, communication, computers, and alarms that is devised for regional notification of a substantial earthquake while it is in progress. This is not the same as earthquake prediction, which is currently incapable of producing decisive event warnings.“–Wikipedia

  203. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 18:22

    Burn coal
    De-fund infrastructure
    ????
    PROFIT

  204. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 18:27

    Hey – I have been to Detroit Lakes. Don’t remember a damn thing about it.

    ha! you must have been to the we-fest then…most people don’t remember anything after that 3 day bingefest…here’s how number one son summed it up when i texted him that his dad won tickets for this year:

    Oh ew i’d rather go to rehab instead of wefest because its still miserable alcoholics but you dont have to listen to unbearable music of feel left out because they missed out on real country

    you can see how any mother would be continually charmed by such a sunny personality….

    also, too…just found out yesterday that a dear friend has finally made the move to dl into a kick-ass lake front condo…i hear they have a phenomenal july fourth celebration on the lake…any ideas of where i’ll be this year? and as far as towns up there go, i would rather live in nearby pelican rapids…totes charming main street and a shockingly diverse population…which i didn’t realize until hubbk’s boss said he thought pelican rapids is a great town…except for all the spics…which was said totally deadpan…and then we all cracked up because, you know…that’s pretty much how good murkins would classify it…

  205. Spooky Beer Snob said,

    October 31, 2012 at 18:29

    Happy Samhain everybody!

    Be sure to drink plenty of aleStingy Jack approves.

  206. Scareded Beer Snob said,

    October 31, 2012 at 18:34

    I’ve been to Detroit Lake many times but never to Detroit Lakes.

  207. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 18:35

    CRA, I had intended the disparity between meteorological and seismic predicting to be a joke. Thanks for the Wikipedia link anyway.

    Really, though, Jay Leno will give his monologue seconds before much of California is underwater whereas Stewart, Colbert et al called in a “snow day” last week.

    It is a difference in perspective.

  208. Angelino said,

    October 31, 2012 at 18:38

    What’s a snow day?

  209. SexyHoneyBadger Beer Snob said,

    October 31, 2012 at 18:39

    Here is an alternate theory of the Jack O’Lantern origin.

  210. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 18:42

    I recall the ads on the teebee and they were horrendous

    well, duh…because KEVIN COSTNER…

  211. lobbey said,

    October 31, 2012 at 18:43

    I’m in a good mood. You couldn’t pay me to click to NRO right now.

    Its dead right now anyway. Jonah forgot to feed the hamsters before running away.

  212. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 18:44

    Pup, I am not. I should remedy that, huh?

    YES! operators are standing by…or i can just give you a shout out during then next pledge drive…that would be awesome!

  213. CRA said,

    October 31, 2012 at 18:45

    It is a difference in perspective.

    Well now I don’t know if you’re getting serious. My guess is no.

  214. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 18:48

    Just be careful if you drive. We did last year and I goddamn near hit a bunch of trick-or-treaters who dashed in front of my car, on a four-lane highway. Whatever candy was on the other side, I sure hope it was worth it.

    THEY SHOULD NOT PUT TRICK OR TREATER CROSSING SIGNS IN HIGH TRAFFIC AREAS!!!

  215. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:00

    Well now I don’t know if you’re getting serious. My guess is no.

    Why’s that? I mentioned some non-serious comedy television, but I’m deadly serious about their reliance on coal-fired electricity. Also serious about how we don’t need it here in California to produce television comedy.

  216. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:00

    “I don’t know why anyone would vote for Romney.”

    grrrr…read a letter to teh editor in this week’s hooterville indigestion that opined that liberals hate romney and continually lable him as ‘unlikable’ because of: his moviestar handsomeness and that he MADE HIS MONEY ALL BY HIMSELF…

    i live in a vast area of dense stupidity and for the life of me, i have no idea how i have not bashed my forehead to a gooey gel with all the desk/forehead contact at high velocities which is required of me each and every motherfucking day…

  217. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:00

    ooooh…i hear chris christie is officially moving halloween…i think this just means that he needs time to replenish the halloween candy he has undoubtedly stress eaten…

  218. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:04

    re: chris christie’s sudden man-crush on obama…it always amazes me how a good old fashioned natural disaster suddenly puts the kabosh on federal government hating…

  219. Whale Chowder said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:05

    I had intended the disparity between meteorological and seismic predicting to be a joke.

    Not a joke to these guys.

  220. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:08

    Why’s that? I mentioned some non-serious comedy television, but I’m deadly serious about their reliance on coal-fired electricity. Also serious about how we don’t need it here in California to produce television comedy.

    to be fair, all that’s really needed to produce television comedy is a bag of tits, an ugly guy and a precocious child…

  221. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:12

    okay, now i’m all caught up…time to go chow down in the break room…featuring killer chili, boo baked potatoes and slimy salad bar…

    also, too…the local baptist church just had an ad for their religious halloween party this evening which is described thusly:
    Hallowlujah Party this Wednesday, October 31, from 6-8pm. This is a safe alternative to the many scary Halloween activities. The event is open to the public and there is no charge for this event.
    The party will feature a wide variety of games and fun activities including face painting. This year it will also feature a photo booth so you will have a memento of this year’s costume. There will be variety of candy and prizes including RC cars to be given away. Every child who attends will leave with a full bag of candy.
    A supper will be served for children and adults throughout the evening. Everyone is invited to come and enjoy the fun. Since this is a Christian alternative party, please no scary costumes or, if possible, remove them at the door.

    sounds like a swelluva time, don’t it?

  222. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:12

    You had me at “bag of tits”.

  223. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:17

    East coast coal-burners complaining about the weather = FAIL

  224. tigris said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:30

    There are only 2 states with no coal-fired electricity generation, both of which are east coast states and both of which were affected by the weather. All the other states burn at least some coal, but a lot of the states affected get the majority of their electricity from natural gas.

  225. Substance McGravitas said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:31

    East coast coal-burners complaining about the weather = FAIL

    Mini __B has a lot to answer for.

  226. Thread Bear said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:32

    Christian alternative party, please no scary costumes or, if possible, remove them at the door.

    Yep, it’s a Christian party. They want all kids to get undressed before they enter. Sounds like it might just be specifically a Catholic party to me.

  227. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:33

    California is pretty dependent on electricity imports as well – FERC calls it a quarter of electricity used in state. I wonder if that imported power is subject to the RPS, I suppose our Anonymous power supply mix expert can tell us.

  228. Thread Bear said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:35

    Although, I must say that the invitations I sent out had a similar line:

    “Please, ladies, wear sexy something costumes and, if possible, remove them at the door.”

  229. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:45

    ooooh…i hear chris christie is officially moving halloween…i think this just means that he needs time to replenish the halloween candy he has undoubtedly stress eaten…

    He’s spending so much time at the storm-ravaged areas so he can “salvage” candy supplies from evacuated houses. Caramels with sea-salt, anyone?

  230. Substance McGravitas said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:45

    California is pretty dependent on electricity imports as well

    We screwed them but good! Ha! Ha!

  231. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:45

    Okay, did a bit of digging. This is a wiki link, because someone’s actually crunched a few numbers[1]:
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_U.S._states_by_carbon_dioxide_emissions

    The smallest carbon footprints by state are: DC, NY, VT, RI, ID, and then CA, It’s 2007 data but looking at EPA’s most recent pdf data indicates that the relative rankings aren’t going to change much.

    [1] And while I don’t mind doing a bit of research, dividing one number by another is just too much work.

    TL;DR version – Anonymous troll is full of shit. Quelle Surprise.

  232. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:46

    East coast coal-burners complaining about the weather = FAIL

    Kindly go fuck yourself, oh chickenshit anonymous commenter.

  233. Whale Chowder said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:49

    “Please, ladies, wear sexy something costumes and, if possible, remove them at the door.”

    Let me know how that works for ya. Also, pics or it didn’t happen.

  234. tigris said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:50

    The smallest carbon footprints by state are: DC, NY, VT, RI, ID, and then CA

    The wiki link has CA as second biggest CO2 emitter after TX…?

  235. Devlishly Handsome Beer Snob said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:50

    sounds like a swelluva time, don’t it?

    I hope you’ll attend this delightful party tonight and wear the scariest ugliest costume imaginable — you’re s’posed to do that so that the devils and demons that walk the earth this night won’t recognize you and cart you off to hell.

    I mean if they want you to take off your costume they’re either pervs, or demons, (or pervy demons!) obviously and you’ll need to loudly berate them for their evil ways.

  236. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:52

    Note: Smallest per-capita footprints of course.

  237. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:53

    I was looking at California’s dependence on coal-fired electricity (thanks, tig), and it seems that California is average (~20 percent). I’ve never lived in California beyond sight of a NG-fired power plant or two (seriously), but it seems that coal is part of the mix. Also, some states have an above-average coal mix (duh).

    No state, ISO, or public utility (outside of WV) claims that coal is the source of its electrical generation. Odd, that.

  238. tigris said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:53

    OK gotcha

  239. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:54

    “Please, ladies, wear sexy something costumes and, if possible, remove them at the door.”

    oh, i don’t know…my ‘sexy abraham lincoln’ costume gets decidedly unsexier when it is removed…

  240. Marion in Savannah said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:54

    sounds like a swelluva time, don’t it?

    The little church down the street for us does the same thing, and the neighborhood is alive with children. Last year 2 little stalking horses came up my driveway to knock on the door to see if those weird old white folks knew what day it was. They got goodie bags, and hurtled back down the driveway screaming “THEY’VE GOT CANDY!!!111!!!”

    We were inundated. Apparently church parties are healthy affairs…

  241. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:55

    oh, i don’t know…my ‘sexy abraham lincoln’ costume gets decidedly unsexier when it is removed…

    Do NOT look up Abraham Lincoln on Urban Dictionary.

  242. Marion in Savannah said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:56

    FROM us, goddamn it, FROM us…

  243. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:56

    Yes, Tigris, the most populous state is also the “second biggest CO2 emitter”. This is a surprise?

  244. tigris said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:57

    No state, ISO, or public utility (outside of WV) claims that coal is the source of its electrical generation. Odd, that.

    The DOE tracks electrical generation by source for each state, and the information is on their site. Typically lags a year or so, but I suppose that would be hard to avoid,

  245. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 19:58

    No state, ISO, or public utility (outside of WV) claims that coal is the source of its electrical generation. Odd, that.

    i know our coal fired plant across the border in fair south dakota, is proud to be a coal burner and has made humongous strides in burning cleaner…also utilizing wind energy…because that is one thing we have plenty of out here on the high plains…lots and lots of wind…which reminds me, last night, we also watched a bit of ken burns’ ‘dust bowl’…i’ve always known i would make a shitty pioneer, but know now that i would make an equally sucky dust bowler…my shit would have been freaked within a week…

  246. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:00

    Kindly go fuck yourself, oh chickenshit anonymous commenter.

    Kindly drown. I’ve been throwing potshots or lurking at S,N! for a very long time. Google says it predates your comments, so…

  247. Marion in Savannah said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:05

    I’ve been throwing potshots or lurking at S,N! for a very long time.

    I guess we’ll just have to believe that, because “Anonymous” shows up pretty often… That’s always you? Damn, you do keep busy around here.

  248. tigris said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:05

    No, but is it then surprising to you that another populous region also emits CO2? And much of it at a rate comparable to California?

  249. Bitter Scribe said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:14

    re: chris christie’s sudden man-crush on obama…it always amazes me how a good old fashioned natural disaster suddenly puts the kabosh on federal government hating…

    I wonder if there’s more to it. He pointedly distanced himself from Romney. Think he doesn’t believe in Romney’s chances?

  250. Substance McGravitas said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:19

    Obviously the places you want destroyed are the places with the best public transportation infrastructure. Stands to reason.

  251. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:23

    I guess we’ll just have to believe that, because “Anonymous” shows up pretty often… That’s always you? Damn, you do keep busy around here.

    Well … Almost everyone (pseudonymously) commenting at S,N! didn’t exist last year, or in ’08 or ’04 . . .

    I thought y’all were trolls.

  252. Pryme said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:25

    Is anyone else hearing Draco Malfoy’s Dad’s voice when they read Annoying Mouse?

  253. Another Kiwi said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:26

    I saw a person dressed as the Terry Pratchett DEATH walking along the road in Kiwiland last night. Well, I hope it was someone dressed up.
    This post was made with extra coal.

  254. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:27

    Tigris, I had assumed you “easters” were dependent on coal. Thanks.

    The rest o’ you, eat a dick.

  255. Cleverly Costumed Beer Snob said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:27

    Well … Almost everyone (pseudonymously) commenting at S,N! didn’t exist last year, or in ’08 or ’04 . . .

    WTF?

  256. Pupienus said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:31

    I’ve been to Detroit Lake many times but never to Detroit Lakes.

    Went out Clackamas River Rd. to Detroit Lake for our (probably) last ride of the season a week or so ago. I was gobsmacked.

  257. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:32

    I wonder if Anonymous troll from the first days of Sadly felt the same way about New Orleans and Katrina – due to all the derricks and refineries in the region.

    Wait, what was that about California again?

  258. Pryme said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:33


    Well … Almost everyone (pseudonymously) commenting at S,N! didn’t exist last year, or in ’08 or ’04 . . .

    WTF?

    Annoying’s obviously a fan of LL Cool J.

    Mark it down, Libs!

  259. Substance McGravitas said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:33

    A positive:

    Still dealing with Sandy. Back soon.

  260. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:34

    I’m the anon upthread that pissed you off.

    I was wondering if coal-fired electricity sounds like a good idea. Does it cause or exacerbate storms like Sandy?

  261. Renewably Fueled Beer Snob said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:35

    Oregon is a good place to live for more reasons than just beer.

  262. VCarlson said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:35

    The problem with speeding up to increase the gap is that either the tailgater will speed up as well, or another asshole will merge into your lane to close the gap you’ve opened.

    Or it could be a cop psyching you into speeding up so as to allow for the issuing of a speeding ticket. Happened to a college roomie of mine, back in the day.

  263. Pupienus said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:39

    Driving divorces you so far from reality

    Driving makes you stupid. (sorry, no link to be found)

  264. Renewably Fueled Beer Snob said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:40

    Also, too: Oregon’s only coal plant is set to shut down in 2020

    The debate has already played out for Oregon largest utility, Portland General Electric, which has agreed to shut its coal plant in Boardman — the state’s only coal-fired plant and its largest stationary source of air pollution — in 2020 rather than spending hundreds of millions of dollars on additional pollution controls there.

  265. tigris said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:41

    Anonymous, you’re welcome, but perhaps if you hesitated before kicking folks you wouldn’t have stirred up the anger you did. Victim blaming rarely makes friends, all the more when it’s not supported by facts.

  266. Unscented Beer Snob said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:42

    Driving makes you stupid. (sorry, no link to be found)

    Riding the bus in a college town makes you hate the inventors of “Axe body spray” with the burning rage of a millions suns.

  267. Substance McGravitas said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:43

    Driving makes you stupid.

    It’s true. I am a much better person when taking the bus to work.

  268. VCarlson said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:44

    Renewably Fueled Beer Snob: I just discovered, when I searched for “coal power hawaii,” that the single coal plant in HI claims (as of 2010, the date of the article I turned up) to be “renewable energy.” And we all know stuff found on the intarwebs (and/or in print) is always true. I hope Oregon requires its power plants to be more honest.

  269. Another Kiwi with extra coal said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:46

    Driving divorces you so far from reality

    Driving makes you stupid. (sorry, no link to be found)

    Both conditions are exacerbated by being in a large arse SUV. (Links in drowned servers)

  270. Marion in Savannah said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:54

    To achieve maximum stupidity drive a Hummer. It’s like carrying a neon sign that says “I’ve got lots more money than brains.”

  271. VCarlson said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:55

    Riding the bus in a college town makes you hate the inventors of “Axe body spray” with the burning rage of a millions suns.

    My deepest sympathies. What is it with teenage* boys and powerful perfumes? Are their olfactory senses deadened, and they can only smell really intense levels of scent?

    *Not just teenagers. I used to work with a guy who must have bought his cologne by the gallon. He moved in his own personal scent zone. Fortunately, our building was a single story, and I never had to ride in an elevator with him.

  272. Major Kong said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:57

    Coal power is only bad if someone wants to charge their electric car with it. Otherwise it’s great because jobs! Shut up libs!

  273. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:58

    Thanks again, tig. That’s not some online sarcastic bullshit. I had assumed that my non-coal lifestyle applied to the rest of us (that don’t comment at Sadly, No!) living far outside of coal country, but it doesn’t.

    The rest of you, again, eat a dick. You weren’t here in 2006, were you?

  274. Pupienus said,

    October 31, 2012 at 20:59

    To achieve maximum stupidity drive a Hummer. It’s like carrying a neon sign that says “I’ve got lots more money than brains PENIS.”

    Fiksd for veracity.

  275. Marion in Savannah said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:01

    Thanks, Pup. You’re right, of course.

  276. VCarlson said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:01

    It’s like carrying a neon sign that says “I’ve got lots more money than brains.”

    Also, IMO, “I have masculinity issues.”

  277. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:03

    Thanks again, tig. That’s not some online sarcastic bullshit. I had assumed that my non-coal lifestyle applied to the rest of us (that don’t comment at Sadly, No!) living far outside of coal country, but it doesn’t.

    It’s nice to see that you can admit when you are wrong. Now do you have anything to say to all those folks flooded out of their homes, you know the ones you told to Reap. The. Whirlwind.?

  278. Ancient Beer Snob said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:08

    The rest of you, again, eat a dick. You weren’t here in 2006, were you?

    You keep saying this. You have no fucking idea what you’re talking about.

    Also, too, &c: DIAF.

  279. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:14

    DKW, I won’t be guilted into sympathy for anyone. I see “Tsunami Zone” signs every day when I wake up and look from my bedroom window. Fact.

    I was wrong about the energy mix in the NY metro. Let me know when someone wants an apology.

    Stop. Burning. Coal.

  280. Doc Logan said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:15

    Apparently Dr. Seuss and George A. Romero were separated at birth.

  281. Bitter Scribe said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:17

    Riding the bus in a college town makes you hate the inventors of “Axe body spray” with the burning rage of a millions suns.

    I dunno. I was kind of forced to start using that stuff—it’s the only deodorant my supermarket sells in a small size for gym bags and travel—and I don’t think it’s so bad. If you stood under the spray for half a minute, sure, you’d reek, but that applies to pretty much any personal care product.

  282. jim the heretical anti-cliff lemming said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:19

    Hallowlujah

    Translation: Since we stole every OTHER holy-day from you disgusting pagans, can we have Samhain too? LOL, just kidding – we’ll steal it & bastardize it beyond recognition whether you like it or not, because JESUS!

    Also, perhaps Anon might want to stop & think about just how moral high ground can be claimed whilst simultaneously mocking dead, injured & homeless people. Or for that matter, how credible concern-trolling over dirty energy is while wasting energy pissing about on the Interwebs in a hive of snark & villainy like this.

    PROTIP: there is no such thing as a truly 100% “clean” source of energy – all forms of power generation eventually degenerate their output into heat energy, & it’s excess heat that’s making the polar icecap go byebye.

    The Second Law Of Thermodynamics: we’re soaking in it.

  283. Substance McGravitas said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:20

    You weren’t here in 2006, were you?

    I was fucking your dad,
    Just one among many,
    Cuz your mother’s a whore
    And I hadn’t a penny.

  284. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:24

    DKW, I won’t be guilted into sympathy for anyone.

    I can see that. Sociopaths are incapable of guilt, let alone sympathy. But I wasn’t here way back in Ought Four, so wevs.

    You said something pretty horrible based on “facts” which were incorrect. But it’s us that ought to “eat a dick” because we got offended by you. Nice.

  285. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:24

    You keep saying this. You have no fucking idea what you’re talking about.

    OBS presence here before or around 2006 = 0

    I didn’t “keep saying this”. Maybe someone should check the archives.

  286. Minty Fresh Beer Snob said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:27

    OBS presence here before or around 2006 = 0

    OK, one more before the killfile is engaged:

    Nyms are known to change, anonymous wankstain.

    Yay for killfiles!

  287. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:29

    DKW, what was it that I said based on incorrect facts that I didn’t retract?

    I’m HAPPY to retract that which I was wrong about because I learned. Yeah, I’ve been here a while, but could could be wrong on some basic assumptions.\

  288. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:29

    And it’s been FIVE LONG YEARS[1]
    Since I’ve done your loving mom
    Yelling PENIS
    At places so random
    You know I still love your
    Mother though she’s quite fat
    It’s been FIVE LONG YEARS
    And your mom is where it’s at.

    [1] Give or take

  289. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:33

    Can you killfile Anonymous?

  290. Major Kong said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:33

    So why is the Romney campaign running ads in Ohio that say “stop Obama’s war on the coal industry”?

  291. Substance McGravitas said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:34

    Can you killfile Anonymous?

    Of course. Why couldn’t you?

  292. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:40

    To recap:

    Anonymous: East coasters are rich complaining about superstorms while burning coal. You’d never see anything like that in Cali.
    S,N! Commentariat: Affected states have similar supply mix and per capita carbon footprint to California.
    Anonymous: My bad. I didn’t know that northeastern states had phased out coal or that California imports all sorts of dirty electricity. In the meanwhile, east coasters can still drown. I’m not sorry.

    Do I have that right?

  293. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:45

    SMG, I’ve never killfiled on WordPress. I guess my question should have been “Can you killfile this Anonymous

    Why are my comments disturbing those that must have badgered prior Anonymi?

  294. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:51

    The rest o’ you, eat a dick.

    no thank you…i’m trying to quit…

    Stop. Burning. Coal.

    some. of. us. are. trying. to…it. doesn’t. happen. over. night…

  295. Substance McGravitas said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:51

    SMG, I’ve never killfiled on WordPress. I guess my question should have been “Can you killfile this Anonymous

    You can killfile any consistent name, and as Anonymi are pretty easy to live without it’s not a big deal.

    Why are my comments disturbing those that must have badgered prior Anonymi?

    Because you’re trolling.

  296. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:56

    Stop. Burning. Coal.

    DKW, northeastern states have not “phased out coal” for electricity generation. My utility company is required to generate at least one-third of its electricity from renewables by law.

    The law on energy mix for New Jersey, please?

  297. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:57

    Coal power is only bad if someone wants to charge their electric car with it. Otherwise it’s great because jobs! Shut up libs!

    so, we have a fairly large ottertail power plant on the south dakota side of big stone lake…good neighbors, big employer, vital to economy…they were going through the process of building ‘big stone ii’…in a depressed economy such as ours and with the thoughts of an influx of workers, businesses were extremely happy since many of them were around for the boom time of big stone i…uh, oh! megaliberals got into the mix and organized many, many protests consisting of large groups of people bussed in from metro areas…big stone ii is no longer*…thanks, fuckers!

    *the only thing that can be seen as an upside is that crazy local editor’s friend who is a notorious slum lord in the twin cities came out here and fleeced some homeowners out of their houses (mostly olds who were already in the nursing home, assisted living or what have you), further fleeced contractors to do the work in fixing them up (using supplies from the hardware store he ‘bought’ and has since foreclosed on) and now all these houses are in foreclosure as well…many lives messed up…also, said slumlord now has cancer and no pot to pee in…is that considred karma?

  298. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:59

    My deepest sympathies. What is it with teenage* boys and powerful perfumes? Are their olfactory senses deadened, and they can only smell really intense levels of scent?

    ugh…the only thing worse is being with these said teenage and tweeners in a closed classroom the period after lunch…

  299. Smut Clyde said,

    October 31, 2012 at 21:59

    all forms of power generation eventually degenerate their output into heat energy, & it’s excess heat that’s making the polar icecap go byebye.

    Do you want the normal Explaining Voice lecture about the role of solar irradiation in the global energy budget, or the Economy-size version?

  300. Whale Chowder said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:01

    To achieve maximum stupidity drive a Hummer.

    Yesterday I saw a bright yellow Suburban H2 with a “Who is John Galt” window decal.

    I’ve never wanted to key a vehicle so badly in my life.

  301. Major Kong said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:03

    I’m confused. My conservative friends assure me that global warming is a hoax. Why do we need to stop burning coal?

  302. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:04

    The law on energy mix for New Jersey, please?

    Just stop. Seriously. New Jersey’s solar RPS is the strictest in the world driving REC market (S-REC) with prices that boggle the minds of anyone not in Ontario. The current RPS 20% by 2020.

  303. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:07

    DKW, I won’t be guilted into sympathy for anyone. I see “Tsunami Zone” signs every day when I wake up and look from my bedroom window. Fact.

    yeah…i don’t get what that proves, but the fact is that pretty much every state and/or country in the world has some sort of weather that will and can cause hideous destruction…there’s only so much that can be done to mitigate mother nature…and when it happens, the decent thing is to sympathize, because bob only knows when it could be your turn…

    also, fun fact! i did not know that too some extent (or maybe only in the mind of ken burns et al) that the dust bowl was to a large extent exacerbated by man…who knew?!?!

  304. tigris said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:07

    What does it matter? Do we hear about an earthquake or tsunami and say “sucks to be you, shouldn’t have built on a fault/coastline?” Jesus.

  305. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:08

    I’m confused. My conservative friends assure me that global warming is a hoax. Why do we need to stop burning coal?

    well, i’m glad i’m not the only one confused by anon’s ‘argument’…i thought perhaps i had missed something while snarking…

  306. Pupienus said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:08

    While walking Bagoas something came to mind and I don’t recall if I said it in the buttchugging thread. So, if one were to use a variety of German sparkling wines you would be having buttsekts.

    Thank you very much.

  307. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:09

    What does it matter? Do we hear about an earthquake or tsunami and say “sucks to be you, shouldn’t have built on a fault/coastline?” Jesus.

    or…mudslide…sucks to be you! shouldn’t have built your house dangling over a cliff!…oh, wait…i have said that…but yeah, natural disasters HAPPEN…

  308. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:10

    While walking Bagoas something came to mind and I don’t recall if I said it in the buttchugging thread. So, if one were to use a variety of German sparkling wines you would be having buttsekts.

    Thank you very much.

    the speed of your wit and the depths to which you will ponder something is truly awe-inspiring…

  309. Pupienus said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:13

    Do we hear about an earthquake or tsunami and say “sucks to be you, shouldn’t have built on a fault/coastline?” Jesus.

    Not exactly. What Rmoney says is “time to invest in home repair businesses to get that sweet government money that is best sent to the private sector. Xenu (or whatever)”

  310. Bitter Scribe said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:14

    Yesterday I saw a bright yellow Suburban H2 with a “Who is John Galt” window decal.

    I’ve never wanted to key a vehicle so badly in my life.

    Oh, please, that would be piling on. I still can’t stop snickering every time I see one of those things. Of all the asinine things to waste money on…

  311. Pupienus said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:14

    Smut – two words should suffice: closed system.

  312. Pupienus said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:15

    One can never ponder overly re teh buttseks.

  313. Pupienus said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:16

    Tiresome troll is tiresome.

  314. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:17

    Incidentally, the California Law is 20% now, 33% in 2020. In New York, which you’re happy to see underwater it’s 30% by 2015.

  315. Another Kiwi with extra coal said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:17

    I find that the worst bit is the looks from fellow bus passengers when I am convulsed by my own humour when thinking up a witticism for threads from two week beforehand.

  316. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:18

    From DKW’s link:

    Governor Corzine has established a goal of meeting 20% of New Jersey’s energy needs through energy efficiency and conservation gains by 2020.

    Good luck with that, Governor, um, Corzine.

  317. Smut Clyde said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:20

    What I do when being tailgated is slow down.

    Gilbert Shelton recommends “releasing from a pressurized tank a slippery, foul-smelling mixture of used motor oil and liquid pig feces”.
    He also recommends concealing a supercharged 6.7L Wildebeest-Cosworth V-8 engine within one’s Citroen 2CV.

  318. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:23

    Ok, New Yorkers, I’ve got other things to do in this time zone. You live by fossil fuels and can’t survive without them. Maybe you can tell me how you pump water out of your subways and power your elevators without burning coal later.

  319. Helmut Monotreme said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:24

    Listen jackass, the percentage of Americans living in the Hurricane affected zone that have controlling interest in utility companies, or set regional energy policies, is within a rounding error of zero. If you were one of the first people to understand global warming, congratulations, help yourself to a cookie. If you have, as by your comments you surely must have, managed to not burn any fossil fuel, or bought any product containing plastic made from fossil fuel, or eaten any food grown with fossil fuel based fertilizer or harvested with fossil fuel powered farm equipment, or bought power made by burning fossil fuel, well then congratulations, write a freaking book, but your heroic effort doesn’t seem to have slowed any storms or saved any polar bears.

    In the meantime those of us whose leverage is limited to a vote once in awhile and growing a garden, don’t really appreciate your comments. I have been aware of and alarmed by, global warming for more than a decade, I bike to work when I can, I wear sweaters rather than turning up the heat in my apartment, I vote for canditdates that have at least a nodding acquaintance with science. And all of that means precisely dick. The half of the country that votes republican plus the NIMBY votes they get from those on the fence do a fine job of stalling investment in alternative energy.

    And all of this conveniently ignores the elephant in the room of overpopulation. We are currently at unsustainable levels of resource use, and barring drastic fundamental changes in the way we eat live and work, society wide, we are headed for an unpleasant crash. So yes, I see the light at the end of the tunnel and I am aware it is an oncoming train, but I got nothing. I can’t stop it, I can’t reverse it, and I can slow it down by a factor of about one in 6,000,000,000. So if you have big ideas to save the world let’s hear them, otherwise I have an idea, you can take your solar powered, holier than thou, elitist bullshit and put it where the sun doesn’t shine.

  320. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:27

    Do you just like being wrong all the time? Although I concede that the new bill has the RPS at 22.5% by 2021.

    http://www.njleg.state.nj.us/2012/Bills/S2000/1925_R4.PDF

  321. VCarlson said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:28

    Addressing the middle distance, I’d like to note that one of the hallmarks of trollishness is, when certain behaviors are pointed out as trollish, to just keep doing it.

  322. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:33

    I’ve got other things to do in this time zone. You live by fossil fuels and can’t survive without them

    grizzly adams, is that you? i would daresay that the majority of americans ‘live by fossil fuels’…i mean, duh…it has to be used…and you’d be preaching to the choir in that respect here, in case you haven’t noticed…i know i certainly couldn’t get by without fossil fuels…i live in the middle of nowhere, so driving is a necessity…i don’t know why you are getting off on this asinine and annoyingly sanctimonious bent you’re on, but i am cranky enough to day and you are wearing quiiiiiiite thin…

  323. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:37

    In This Thread, natural gas is not a fossil fuel.

  324. tigris said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:39

    http://blogs.kqed.org/climatewatch/2011/10/19/californias-dirty-secret-the-five-coal-plants-supplying-our-electricity/

    So it’s possible NYC gets less power from coal than LA.

  325. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:43

    DKW, lying is your thing, right? Searching for “22.5″ in that returns what result?

  326. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:44

    Don’t. Natural Gas.Drill.

  327. tigris said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:44

    Of course it’s a fossil fuel, but it’s cleaner than coal. Ideally we’d get as efficient as possible and use renewables as much as possible, but as pointed out by Helmut it’s a societal issue, not a personal one.

  328. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:44

    Working. Koch. Industries.

  329. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:46

    Stop. NG Drilling. Now.

  330. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:47

    oh, fuck me…i FINALLY got my wordpress blog to autopost to facebook!!! hallefuckinglujah!

  331. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:49

    Cleave. S,N! Libya. Intervention.

    Game. On.

  332. El Manquecito said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:50

    Terriific. Finally get back on the toobz just in time for seniority/purity trolling.

  333. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:50

    Game. On.

  334. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:51

    Beep. From. Kim.

  335. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:52

    Obama. Lies.

  336. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:53

    Flying. Monkey. NOW.

  337. jim the heretical anti-cliff lemming said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:53

    Heckuva damage-control job, Brownie!

  338. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:54

    Do this, also too Now.

  339. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:55

    Gorbachev sings: tractors! Turnips! Buttocks!

  340. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:57

    No mountaintop removal.

  341. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 22:58

    Blitzkrieg bop!

  342. El Manquecito said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:00

    Or whatever this is. Sheesh

  343. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:01

    Stop continental drift!

  344. tigris said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:02

    Terriific. Finally get back on the toobz just in time for seniority/purity trolling.

    Says the filthy guy who just started posting tomorrow.

  345. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:03

    Leave Britney alone!

  346. Seismically Active Beer Snob said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:03

    Sorry Canuckistanis.

  347. Substance McGravitas said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:08

    Earthquake scientists. Put ‘em ALL in jail.

  348. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:09

    Gorbachev sings: tractors! Turnips! Buttocks!

    i smell a hit!!!

  349. Butch Pansy said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:11

    How long does it take to get tenure around here? When do my benefits kick in? Do I get holiday pay on holy days ?

  350. VCarlson said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:13

    Earthquake scientists. Put ‘em ALL in jail.

    ALL scientists. All they do is tell people things they don’t want to hear. Jailing them will, of course, ensure none of it happens. /snark

  351. Substance McGravitas said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:13

    Hey, all of Science Made Stupid is online! I recommend page 38 for dolts who don’t understand how earthquakes happen.

  352. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:15

    DKW, lying is your thing, right? Searching for “22.5? in that returns what result?

    Totally lying. You have to be able to add. 2.5% in 2000, an extra 0.5% every year until 2006, then one percent until 2012, etc etc. Although to be fair, I didn’t add it up myself and counted on the various reports about Jersey SB1925 to be accurate.

  353. tsam said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:16

    Things were going so well at bag of tits. Then troll threw a bag of dicks in it. WTF

  354. CRA said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:17

    I’m glad I spent the last four or five hours working, not checking in here. How tedious.

    I figured someone who’d type this (Anonymous said, October 31, 2012 at 18:09), in earnest or in trollmode, might well think that earthquakes can be predicted. Now I see the wisdom of having disengaged.

  355. Anonymous said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:18

    . . i would daresay that the majority of americans ‘live by fossil fuels’…i mean, duh…it has to be used…and you’d be preaching to the choir in that respect here

    Stop. Burning Coal. I’m not preaching to every choir–just those that are whinging about coal-driven climate change while they’re drowned by the results (i.e. trolling).

  356. El Manquecito said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:19

    Says the filthy guy who just started posting tomorrow.
    Got me there. El Sucio qui ya empazo escribir mañana.

  357. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:19

    Oh BTW, yes. Jersey’s RPS dates from 1999, meaning they were legally mandating renewables FIVE LONG YEARS before California. Although I suppose in this case, having been somewhere earlier than others doesn’t count for anything.

  358. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:26

    And let me reiterate – not only does California still have a handful of coal fired plants (although I concede they are all small) – she imports a pile of coal-fired electricity. Like enough to make the coal %age in the overall supply mix about the same as in NYISO.

  359. bbkf said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:27

    Stop. Burning Coal. I’m not preaching to every choir–just those that are whinging about coal-driven climate change while they’re drowned by the results (i.e. trolling).

    oooohhhhh…so, what’s getting your shit all up in our grills today is that in aught-six or aught-four or in years past, some posters here were whinging about coal driven climate change? and now that there has been a hellacious act of nature and some here have been affected by it (damn whingers!) that you are claiming some sort of superiority at perceived hypocrisy? is that what all this is about?

  360. tsam said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:32

    Heckuva damage-control job, Brownie!

    The guy is even incompetent at criticizing! What an asshole. What a maroon. What a nincompoop.

  361. Another Kiwi with extra coal said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:33

    But but but he knows about horses!!

  362. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:33

    Also ZOMG – Jersey’s renewable standard is an RES while California’s is an RPS. Since Anonymous is a stupid idiot, he probably doesn’t know what that means. What it means is that picking Jersey as an example of a jurisdiction not committed to renewables is about as wrong as a person can get. Like Paul Ryan level of wrong.

  363. Tipped Over Beer Snob said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:37

    what’s getting your shit all up in our grills today

    I certainly hope everybody’s grills remained upright and undamaged after the franken- mega- super- shit-storm.

  364. VCarlson said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:41

    The guy is even incompetent at criticizing! What an asshole. What a maroon. What a nincompoop.

    But it got him some attention! And I guess that’s what his puny spirit needs.

  365. VCarlson said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:46

    I certainly hope everybody’s grills remained upright and undamaged after the franken- mega- super- shit-storm.

    Maybe that’s why Certain Sites are down – they’re too busy filing for aid for their toppled grills to pay attention.

  366. Whale Chowder said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:57

    The guy is even incompetent at criticizing! What an asshole. What a maroon. What a nincompoop.

    I had to look twice to see if you were criticizing Brownie or Anonymous.

  367. Whale Chowder said,

    October 31, 2012 at 23:57

    Also, new post.

  368. Cerberus said,

    November 1, 2012 at 0:01

    Anon has a long history of being here for two posts. And if he has any desire to stay longer, he might try acting less like banhammer bait.

  369. Anonymous said,

    November 1, 2012 at 0:02

    But it got him some attention! And I guess that’s what his puny spirit needs.

    That’s why she or he posted anonymously! To get some attention. It totally makes sense, right?

  370. Anonymous said,

    November 1, 2012 at 0:03

    Thanks, DKW.

    Also, new post.

  371. Anonymous said,

    November 1, 2012 at 0:05

    Anon has a long history of being here for two posts.

    No, Cerb, this Anon has been here longer than you have. I rarely comment though.

  372. Cerberus said,

    November 1, 2012 at 0:07

    Dude, I have access to your comments and IP address.

    Let me put this gently.

    No. You. Haven’t.

  373. Nym said,

    November 1, 2012 at 0:30

    As a Californian myself, lemme just say I would not cry if Anon got 3rd-degree burns over 50% of his body during a Santa Ana-fueled wildfire.

  374. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    November 1, 2012 at 0:49

    Sorry for the boring troll feederies, but renewable energy is a thing I sort of do for a living. Also, don’t want to be too down on CA. 33% is a strong RPS. Also, they’ve given thought to grid integration with an energy storage standard. Plus some excellent work on distributed community energy projects. Also the phase out of once-through-cooling, something that is unthinkable in my jurisdiction of Ontario. But not exactly a great high horse to lecture others about coal fired power.

  375. The Dark Avenger said,

    November 1, 2012 at 13:04

    Even here in the buckle of the California Bible Belt in the southern San Joaquin Valley, they’re putting in solar farms on otherwise unused land and other places.

Leave a Comment

  • Things of Interest

  • Meta Goodness

  • Clunkers

  • httpbl_stats()