Shorter George F. (and you know what that stands for but if you don’t it ends in “wad”) Will, The Liberal Bastion of Columnists Charles Kraphammer and Michael Gerbilson
Can Romney turn this contest around?
- The real victim of racism in America is Mitt Romney.
When conservative white male pundits write about race issues, you are pretty much guaranteed that you’re going to get some version or other of the “blacks are the real racists” meme that they hold so dear to their hearts. You can expect an anecdote about a poor rich white frat boy who has some disabled black lesbian professor’s boot on his neck. Along with that will be the required observation on the unjustness of black rappers being able to say nigger when a poor white man can’t even perform in a minstrel show in blackface without being convicted of a hate crime and executed by lethal injection in Blackville, New Blackedonia.
But Will, who is the poster child for the tragedy of diminished white entitlement, has a new spin. It’s not the blacks who are racists against whites. No, it’s the whites who have now turned racist against themselves. According to Will, the American electorate is now mostly composed of self-loathing whites that would prefer to keep a blackity-black President in the White House rather than to admit that electric cars are a failure and vote for the white guy. (Seriously, Will’s biggest complaint about Obama in this column is plug-in cars.)
In the midst of this hilarity that attributes Mitt’s declining numbers to white-on-white racism there is another gem. Whereas most people talk about Jackie Robinson as a milestone in our progress against racism, Will instead finds the real milestone to be another black baseball-playing Robinson, namely Frank Robinson, a black manager of the Cleveland Indians. And it wasn’t hiring him that was the milestone. No, no siree:
[A]n even more important milestone of progress occurred June 19, 1977, when the Indians fired [Frank Robinson]. That was colorblind equality.
Yes, let’s celebrate the importance of firing a black man as the true milestone. I mean, after all, black men had never been fired before that and had been cruelly denied the white privileges of homelessness, unemployment, and poverty. For fuck’s sake, this must be the single most absurd thing to ever appear within the pages of the WaPo and you have to wonder whether in the next paragraph Will is going to claim that the true measure of racial equality is when we get can back to stringing black men up from tree limbs. Really. Or maybe the next milestone is when we stop depriving white people of being able to go to movie theatres and ride on buses with their own kind.
I should stop here but, this being Sadly, No! and my desire to humiliate this bow-tied fuckwad not being yet slaked, I want to go back to the electriccarpocalypse that Will thinks is the slam dunk reason for deposing Obama.
Tesla joins California-based Fisker, another floundering would-be maker of high-end rides for rich people, which has received a $529 million DOE loan.
Sadly, No!. The DOE authorized that amount but had only loaned $193 million before further loans from the DOE were cut off to the company last May for failure to meet milestones. So either the WaPo has no fact checkers, Will hasn’t heard about Google, or Will is a lying scumbag. I’ll take door number three, Monty.