Is It Possible For “Webelos” To Be Any Gayer?
Shorter Chuck “Walker, Texas Gay-nger” Norris, Ammoland:
Is Obama Creating a Pro-Gay Boy Scouts of America?
- Obama has bribed the CEO of Ernst & Young to turn all the boys in the Boy Scouts gay.
The best part of Norris’s rant is what he thinks are the bribes that Obama has paid James Turley, the Ernst & Young CEO, to turn the Boy Scouts, and all your children in the Boy Scouts, gay. Now, keep in mind that we’re talking about the CEO of Ernst & Young here, a guy who probably trades in his Maybach for a new one each time it gets soiled by a few raindrops and who, it is safe to say, never has to worry whether he can afford another bottle of the 1998 Petrus at lunch.
So, it is particularly hilarious to see that Norris believes that Obama can induce him to make the Boy Scouts gay by inviting him to one state dinner, putting him on the President’s Export Council, and giving him a seat on another advisory panel. Seriously, these three things are the “perks and favors” with which, according to Norris, Obama “prodded” him to turn the Boy Scouts gay. I mean if that’s all that it takes, what the fuck does he think Turley would do for a cabinet position? Personally give David Axelrod a blow job during each daily press briefing?
I realize that for Norris, whose income these days is probably just enough to keep him in cold wieners and warm Budweiser, might himself be willing to go gay for a relatively small perk, but that hardly means that someone who still has a real career can be so easily induced.
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™
If you ask me “Texas Ranger” has a kind of rainbow sound to it. Of course, to paraphrase some comedian thirty years ago in an HBO special I barely remember, “I’m from New York. When I see a muscular guy in cowboy boots, he’s the one I think is gay.”
best toiletshop ever.
I mean they’re not called we-blows for nuttin’
just sayin is all
There are now merit badges for buttsecks.
I thought entertainers were s’posed to “just shut up” about politics?
Yes, CN should “Shut up and kick something”
So, it is particularly hilarious to see that Norris believes that Obama can induce him to make the Boy Scouts gay by inviting him to one state dinner, putting him on the President’s Export Council, and giving him a seat on another advisory panel. Seriously, these three things are the “perks and favors” with which, according to Norris, Obama “prodded” him to turn the Boy Scouts gay.
I’m sure Chuck thinks he’s also getting a steady supply of catamites.
Oh, great. We have 2 little newbies in the cubes outside my office and they now think that the old broad in the office has lost her mind because she’s cackling like a crazy woman… What kg said about the best toiletshop ever, x2.
Cubing the newbies.
Oh, great. We have 2 little newbies in the cubes outside my office and they now think that the old broad in the office has lost her mind because she’s cackling like a crazy woman… What kg said about the best toiletshop ever, x2.
When you finally seduce them to the Sadly Side, they’ll understand.
Is it a coincidence that as Chuck Norris turned to punditry America got more and more gay-friendly?
This is the very thing that PATRIOT Chuck Norris is complaining about!!!
Cub Scouts, not Boy Scouts, Chuckie.
Chuck’s gettin’ blasted in the comments. I bet it feels just like when those producers had him “audition” early in his career…
I have no doubt that the boy scouts are teaching boys to be gay. Why, I overheard a scoutmaster teaching a bunch of lads how to pitch a tent!
The comments on the original article are awesome. My only gripe, somebody says that Chuck Norris never made a good movie or TV show in his life. BS. He was in the greatest martial arts movie ever, Enter the Dragon–in which Bruce Lee kicks his ass.
Why, I overheard a scoutmaster teaching a bunch of lads how to pitch a tent!
They’re supposed to be cheerful. Which means gay!
And obedient!
And clean!
Chuck’s gettin’ blasted in the comments.
Damn, is he ever! Sweet to read.
The BSA apparently can’t tell the difference between gays and pedophiles. I say “apparently” because I can’t tell if this is a cynical attempt to conflate the two, as the Catholic clergy so often does to deflect outrage over pedophile priests.
Enter the Dragon–in which Bruce Lee kicks his ass.
Especially when he rips part of the front of chuck’s sweater off him! That was AWESOME!
as the Catholic clergy so often does to deflect outrage over pedophile priests.
Oddly enough, it sort of works among people who have to buy velcro fastening shoes.
Chuck starts fourteen paragraphs with “Is it a coincidence that …” (and a fifteenth features it a few words further in).
Yes, Chuck, fifteen times yes? What he never bothers doing is establishing Turley’s views prior to receiving Favors ‘n’ Perks from Obama. If Turley has been this way prior, why then the F&Ps might be for other purposes than perverting the Boy Scouts, or just part and parcel of being in Turley’s circle, which is more rarefied and liberal than Chuck’s.
“These Turley-Obama cords, connections and correlations are only the tip of the iceberg.” — Because Chuck has 50% more irrelevant cords, connections, and correlations! but no iceberg. He’s got fifteen cubes he’s calling iceberg tips, and they’re melting as we speak.
I think that Chuck is jealous that his involvement with the BSoA is not as high-level as Turley’s or Obama’s. Maybe the org does not want to consign itself to a dwindling wingnut ghetto by embracing bigotry and being associated with cretinous clowns. I dunno.
From Chuck;
If two people think so much alike, you can bet that one person isn’t thinking.
Thank you for confirming my suspicion that the vast and overwhelming majority of conservative voters aren’t thinking at all.
If two people think so much alike, you can bet that one person isn’t thinking.
HE STOLED THAT FROM EMERSON OR THOREAU OR SOME SMARTY PANTS WRITER TYPE
I’m kidding, he probably stole it from a modern statesman like Rush.
So he has the same opinion/theory as a 14-year-old “rising conservative star” from You Tube.
We had a mayor here in Spokane for a while who was a Scoutmaster. He was also a pedophile. He was also gay. He was also installed to give the local ruling family a parking garage for their upscale mall for free. He also tried to criminalize teen on teen sex while in the state legislature. He also talked an awful lot about family values and such. He was Sherrif’s deputy for a long time. Through and through Republican. His downfall was when he was caught using his royal mayorly computer to have sexytalk with underaged males.
I’m guessing Jim West and Suck-a-Chub Chuck would have been thick as thieves. Fortunately, Jim West died of (hopefully excruciating) cancer.
Typical libtard homophobia!
Say, ain’t that Norris feller one o’ them elitist Hollywood actor types?
Say, ain’t that Norris feller one o’ them elitist Hollywood actor types?
He’s no actor.
Webelos gay? Who’d a thunk it? When I was in Webelos and then in Boy Scouts, we’d always joke that Webelos was short for “We Blow Loyal Scouts”.
Seriously, though, as an Eagle Scout, I do hope that the Boy Scouts will become gay friendly. Growing up in an area with a reasonable amount of fundie-antics occurring and also being not the most stereotypically proto-masculine of boys (I was a nerd and hence more interested in books than sports), Boy Scouts was an excellent environment to explore my more athletic and out-doorsy side while still being rewarded (yeah merit badges!) for being smart. It also gave me a chance to interact more with other boys (outside of my fellow nerd-herd, I generally interacted with girls because they were less threatening and, speaking as a heterosexual, a helluva lot easier on the eyes!) as well as to interact with other people who were religious but whose religious views differed from my own. In short it was a really good social experience for me.
Hence, it has pained me to see the anti-gay direction the organization took (it wasn’t like that when I was in Scouts … or at least not obviously so), and I would love to get back into the organization if it is a friendly place to be: if it’s not friendly to boys who differ from the typical straight Christian boy by being, well, not straight, how friendly could it be to boys who differ in other ways?
I don’t have time to wade through infested waters to get rotten mangos, so I am not following the link now, but I do hope the BSA is turning around and becoming more like the girl scouts in this regard (and I do hope that the girl scouts will do more and more out-doorsy stuff to teach girls that it’s ok to be a girl and be sporty, out-doorsy, etc.).
Why, I overheard a scoutmaster teaching a bunch of lads how to pitch a tent! – B^4
I remember one time my dad and I purchased a new tent (made in Korea) that was particularly fancy and complicated, so we had to turn to the manual to figure out how to pitch the thing. Someone really goofed in the translation because the heading for the directions was “erection instructions”.
Say, ain’t that Norris feller one o’ them elitist Hollywood actor types?
Him and John Wayne and Ronald Reagan and Charlton Heston and Clint Eastwood and Bruce Willis and Sylvester Stallone and Mel Gibson and Jon Voight and Ben Stein and Fred Thompson and Ahnuld the Governator. Yep, that’s Liberal Hollywood.
Air Force survival school got camping out of my system for life. I happen to think indoor plumbing was a really great invention.
Since I took survival training at Happy Camper Camp in McMurdo Station Antarctica, I can pitch a tent in a blizzard.
Today I learned that there is a beetle called the “cockchafer.” (I am processing an artist’s papers, and he had a fine captioned photo of a cockchafer clipped from Nat. Geo.) Wikipedia provides some colorful paragraphs:
Collecting adults was an only moderately successful method. In the Middle Ages, pest control was rare, and people had no effective means to protect their harvest. This gave rise to events that seem bizarre from a modern perspective. In 1320, for instance, cockchafers were brought to court in Avignon and sentenced to withdraw within three days onto a specially designated area, otherwise they would be outlawed. Subsequently since they failed to comply, they were collected and killed. (Similar animal trials also occurred for many other animals in the Middle Ages.)[3]
In some areas and times, cockchafers were even served as food. A 19th century recipe from France for cockchafer soup reads: “roast one pound of cockchafers without wings and legs in sizzling butter, then cook them in a chicken soup, add some veal liver and serve with chives on a toast”. And a German newspaper from Fulda from the 1920s tells of students eating sugar-coated cockchafers. A cockchafer stew is referred to in W.G. Sebald’s novel The Emigrants.
How could I have missed: Children since antiquity have played with cockchafers.
so THIS is where everybody’s at…g dang it! i just posted some choice ‘one l two ns’ word salads from yesterday on the last post…jeepers…
Someone really goofed in the translation because the heading for the directions was “erection instructions”.
Well, I dunno. In the building trades, there are people who unironically describe themselves as “erection specialists.” They have a number of magazines and journals with titles like that. At a glance I pegged them as skyscraper guys.
And so the fuck what if he was, you gigantic bearded prick? Go roundhouse yourself in the FACE.
Stupid tagfail
Speaking of Scouts, I enjoyed Moonrise Kingdom. See it if you like that Wes Anderson quirky crap.
I wanna believe that when “erection specialists” of any kind hold a conference, the bar for dick jokes is set very high. You gotta bring your A-game.
On the Saturday Night Live episode that Gerald Ford’s press secretary guest-hosted, Gilda Radner did an Emily Litella rant on “presidential erections.” It was originally going to be about, you know, but the censors made them change it to buildings.
hahahahahah…i love this comment excerpt written by an eagle scout:
also, mayor r.t. ryback is chewing joe soucheray’s ass on the air…today is turning out to be the most AWESOMEST EVAR!
oooh…now mayor r.t. ryback just swore on the air! twice!
It was originally going to be about, you know, but the censors made them change it to buildings.
We’re a stolid people who need a proper excuse to talk about a president’s penis for twenty-odd years.
So Chuck Norris got the memo that said “Oh Boy, SCOTUS of America is to be our big target today”, and ran with it in the completely wrong direction.
More genius: http://www.lawyersgunsmoneyblog.com/2012/06/disbelief/comment-page-1#comment-287928
People threatening to move to Canada over Healthcare Reform being declared Constitutional.
i’m off to work at the club…looking forward to the olds coming out in force to eat ALL U CAN EAT SHRIMP to be bitching up a storm about the socialism which took place today…i shall have a large martini for all of you…
LOL at those moving-to-Canada tweets.
Sidebar add or link there: “Man Magically Cured of Erectile Dysfunction After Drinking Wife’s Breast Milk”
Cured by magic, or as if by magic?… Either way, I think he is just the sorta guy that gets turned on by drinking his wife’s breast milk. That’s all that does it for him anymore. Trying to imply there’s a folk remedy here is just naive.
I really wish the BSA would catch up with virtually every other Scout movement in the fucking world and drop the sexism, homophobia and atheist-bashing. Makes the rest of us look bad…
By law this must be posted every time Chuck Norris starts babbling about the gays, but if this doesn’t seriously ping your gaydar you’re probably still dreaming that nice Anderson Cooper will someday marry your daughter:
Chuck Norris, clearly auditioning for the Village People
Chuck doth protest too much, yadda yadda etc. etc. and so forth.
People threatening to move to Canada over Healthcare Reform being declared Constitutional.
They’re moving to the country they use as an example of just how scary and evil socialized medicine is to argue against a health plan that has almost no social aspect to it whatsoever…
SUPER GENIUSES!
Conservatives trying to move to Canada are in for a big surprise. You can move to a new home there but your money, in the form of tax returns, still belongs to Uncle Sam. And if you try to take your money out of the US there’s a pretty heavy penalty, or is it tax, for doing so. And you have to renounce your US citizenship. Which should tell us just how “patriotic” they really are.
I s’pect Chuck is angry because Mormon domination of the BSA is threatened.
Wingnut welfare is possible for a has-been-actor & clapped-out Kung Fu jerk.
Even here there is gum to be cleaned off sidewalks and such.
Sub, jim, DKW, Lurking Canadian: If you come in contact with any of these illegal immigrants flooding your borders and stealing your jobs and getting all that free health care and welfare, I hope you treat them accordingly. I suggest you build a dang fence.
Enter the Dragon–in which Bruce Lee kicks his ass.
It was Way of the Dragon, actually. Enter… is where Bruce Lee kicks the asses of Sammo Hung and Jackie Chan way back before anyone really knew who they were.
Oh, and there is of course much wailing and gnashing of teeth from wingnuts on Twitter. I sort of wish one of them would choke on their own tongue.
Even here there is gum to be cleaned off sidewalks and such.
I think Singapore has dealt w/ that problem. But if you don’t want to go that route, all the clowns invading you (not actually likely to happen) will probably be competent to scrape gum, so at least there’ll be work for them.
a cynical attempt to conflate the two, as the Catholic clergy so often does to deflect outrage over pedophile priests.
Relevant.
Especially when he rips part of the front of chuck’s sweater off him! That was AWESOME!
Yeah, you could have cut the sexual tension with a knife. No wonder Chuck doth protest too much.
The photoshop is great, he looks like “Streetwalker, Texas Ranger”.
Someone at FearRepublic has figured it out! Roberts changed his vote when Sandusky was convicted. Out of fear. Of something. They didn’t specify.
Here’s the full whatever on the Roberts blackmail.
The fact is, America is now in the hands of the leftist redistributionists. US PATRIOTS must rise up and remove the illigitimit ueslurpers of the hard, far left and replace the SUmpreme Court with a panel of balanced viewpoints, since none of them udnertsnat the cositiution, and the poriginal intent of NO TAXES and FREEDOM
ueslurpers of the hard, far left
Hm, all reports I had were that Roberts, Scalia, Thomas all swung to the right.
…but then perhaps Gary has “inside the beltway” information.
*Ahem*
remove the illigitimit ueslurpers
Isn’t U.E. Slurper a 7-Eleven mascot?
After some extensive research, I think I may have found the cause of Norris’ ire.
Here’s the full whatever on the Roberts blackmail.
Ruh roh. When the tape isn’t brought forth I bet there will be a missing, presumed dead, SS agent.
Chuck Norris is a fag. I installed two-way mirrors in his pad in Brentwood, and he come to the door in a dress
The fact is, Hitler made heath care free just before he killed all the Jews. Obama will do the same to all the white people.
The fact is, the liberals are the gay ones.
Socialism.
Hitler.
Unconsitutional.
Tax.
Obama is raising taxes on the middle class and liberals cheer? How hippocratical.
If two people think so much alike, you can bet that one person isn’t thinking.
So who thought that one up for you, Einstein?
Socialism.
Hitler.
Unconsitutional.
Tax.
US
PATRIOTS.
That’s why.
What are they gonna regulate next, LIEBERALS?
DAT PHOTOSHOP … also, DEM COMMENTS!
Seems the mythical power of NorrisBeard avails him not a jot in Ammoland.
I suggest you build a dang fence.
Why bother? Can’t imagine too many Good Ole Boyz will last to the end of one good stiff Manitoba winter.
Irony Alert: Algore is now officially fatter than EVAR!
You don’t really come here for the hunting, now do you.
Hoo boy, Chuckles is getting the snot round-house kicked out him in the comments. That is justice my friends.
Chuck Norris is a fag. I installed two-way mirrors in his pad in Brentwood, and he come to the door in a dress
I thought that was John Wayne. Man, I can’t keep up with these guys anymore!
(BTW — so what? Lots of guys like to watch their buddies fuck… I know I do!)
Wow… that reads weird if you don’t know the context.
whoa…the weather channel is in meltdown mode over the extreme heat in the nether regions of the u.s…it’s almost as if it has never been hot there before…don’t they know algore is fat?
extreme heat in the nether regions of the u.s.
After reading this, I may never have sex again.
Also, blogwhore: Mini__B is showing furry tendencies.
“Also, blogwhore: Mini__B is showing furry tendencies”
Can he give us an unbiased review of “Ted?” I don’t trust the anti-furry MSM.
They’ll pry the broccoli from my cold dead hand!
Are there/were there *any* Reich Wing members of the entertainment community that aren’t/weren’t philosophically stunted blowhards and know-nothings? Even Johnny Ramone seemed to praise Reagan as a response to the liberal wing wanting to help and always having a “cause” they expected everyone to get on board for.
Nowadays, it seems the selfishness as a virtue crowd and the permissiveness of Hollywood backlash creates strange bedfellows. Conservative eye candy Heather Locklear bangs bad boy rocker Tommy Lee…Kid Rock and the Motor City Meltdown man like swimming against the tide as if that makes them trail blazers rather than merely casting their lot with fear- and hate-mongers.
I love the remarkably sage wisdom and clarity from a Craig T. Nelson who declared without a trace of irony that, ” “I’ve been on food stamps and welfare and nobody helped me out”.
Hm, all reports I had were that Roberts, Scalia, Thomas all swung short, shriveled and always to the right.
Fiqt
Also–I’ve missed this place.
And we’ve missed you, dude. Where da fuck you been?
Where da fuck you been?
Finding work. Losing work. Finding it again. Seems like I’m good now!
I’ve been lurking though, don’t worry.
*Ahem*
Spear–I had no idea you lived in Canada. Where in Canada? How does this tie in with your obsession with Mistress Christina and her heavenly breasts?
Kid Rock and the Motor City Meltdown man like swimming against the tide as if that makes them trail blazers rather than merely casting their lot with fear- and hate-mongers.
You mean covering Skynard songs DOESN’T make one a trail blazer? Shit. I better rethink my next music project.
N__B, you n00b.
You can’t call it a ‘blogwhore’ if you don’t post the link.
~
Can he give us an unbiased review of “Ted?”
Sure. Can you understand his emphatic gibberish?
Mel Gibson and Jon Voight and Ben Stein
That would make for a great Lethal Weapon-Anaconda type documentary about Intelligent Design.
Wait – that’s a PHOTOSHOP?!!??!
“Can you understand his emphatic gibberish?”
Maybe. If it is emphatic, it is prolly urgent. There are only a handful of urgencies in a wee one’s world. The most urgent of the urgencies is hunger. But, that doesn’t help me to determine if “Ted” is worth seeing. Most movie critics write gibberish, but I can’t remember any “emphatic” gibberish.
You mean covering Skynard songs DOESN’T make one a trail blazer?
Shhhh. Don’t tell Larry Cordle.
There are only a handful of urgencies in a wee one’s world.
In general, maybe. He seems to think everything’s urgent except when he suddenly stops and stares at a toe (sometimes his, sometimes mine) for two minutes without blinking.
That would make for a great Lethal Weapon-Anaconda type documentary about Intelligent Design.
If I begin attempting to wrap my head around the confluence of disturbations this thing brings to mind, my head will splode.
…
He seems to think everything’s urgent except when he suddenly stops and stares at a toe (sometimes his, sometimes mine) for two minutes without blinking
well at least he isn’t practicing masturbatory navel gazing…i hear that’s bad…
I don’t know about you but it’s usually not my navel I’m gazing at while I’m mastur…um, forget I said anything.
do whales even HAVE navels?
Hey as long as you don’t have issues looking into a blue diamond then you’re probably ok.
Ha ha, Whale Chowder has the least-sexy navel around.
do whales even HAVE navels?
OMG
He seems to think everything’s urgent except when he suddenly stops and stares at a toe (sometimes his, sometimes mine) for two minutes without blinking
Kids learn more in their first few years than in the rest of their lives, or something like that, so I guess staring at that toe is a cognitive explosion now unfathomable to us as adults.
Now we stare because of psychedelics, or an artistic temperament, or often dumbly without seeing.
tigris, please. NSFW warnings cost nothing!
OMG
yes, that is quite the navel…
also, too…whaley will prolly be in his bunk for a while…
Kids learn more in their first few years than in the rest of their lives, or something like that, so I guess staring at that toe is a cognitive explosion now unfathomable to us as adults.
True. He’s learned (without any help) to simulate getting stoned by twirling in place until he’s dizzy.
do whales even HAVE navels?
Sounds like somebody’s got to watch some teevee!
Welcome back, Esteev. We may not have any “fatted calf” for the prodigal, but there’s always plenty of POOP!
http://wonkette.com/476891/rep-jean-schmidt-has-public-orgasm-over-incorrect-cnn-health-care-scoop
mean jean delivers
OMG
Oooh, baby!
Typical government worker, idling and orgasming on the job.
Excuse me a minute.
Toronto. I’d say “Leafs Suck!”, but that would require me to care about hockey.
Typical government worker, idling and orgasming on the job.
“Working in the pubic sector…”
http://wonkette.com/476891/rep-jean-schmidt-has-public-orgasm-over-incorrect-cnn-health-care-scoop
BLERGH.
BLERGH.
Like a Wonketteer said, there’s not enough brain bleach in the multiverse.
PENIS
Based on the trailers I saw, I WILL be going to see Ted.
You got Mila Kunis (OMG SO FUCKING HOT), and the Family Guy guy, who I think is incredibly funny.
You got Mila Kunis (OMG SO FUCKING HOT), and the Family Guy guy, who I think is incredibly funny.
mark wahlberg, also too…ted can only be a win/win…
i might barf: soucheray and his callers are praising krauthammer and his recent output of poopy…
Just saw Ted. Most of the humor is a wee bit advanced for mini__B but not TOO far advanced. Most excellently juvenile.
Most of the humor is a wee bit advanced for mini__B but not TOO far advanced.
Mini__B is not amused by POOP, so I fear he’s left his McFarlane days behind. So to speak.
So Boner is appealing DOMA to the supremes. Apart from the hilarity of the admin arguing against while hacks hired by Speaker Boner argue for, it’s pretty fucking disgusting. I am almost tempted to see what GayPutzRiot has to say in praise of the blessed conservatives using him as a political football. Almost.
It’s funny because it’s cruel!
A marked deck?
In MY Free Market Casino?
It’s more likely than you think … as in 100% likely.
Went back to PJMedia today to see how my personal source of wingnut news is faring. Sure enough, major case of Teh Sadz.
“Your Own Private 21 Tax Salute: The clock is ticking on ObamaCare, the mother, grandmother, and great aunt of all taxes.”
“Standing Athwart ‘Fundamental Transformation:’ After yesterday’s ObamaCare decision, it’s time to man up and realize we’re in the fight of our lives — and one with no pre-ordained guarantee of victory.”
“Justice Roberts’ Reckless Restraint: Was this capitulation? Is he irrational or cowardly? Off his meds? You decide.”
“ObamaCare Ruling: Pure Fraud And No Due Process: Led by Chief Justice Roberts, the Supreme Court has decided that Americans have no right to due process.”
“A Modest Proposal: The chief justice threw down the gauntlet on Thursday to those of us who support limited government.”
“The Supremes Got It Fundamentally Wrong: The Court has issued a ruling with terrible implications for the future.”
“SCOTUS & Obamacare: The Search For A Silver Lining: Did John Roberts hand the president a legislative victory in one hand and political doom in the other?”
“What Should Americans Do After The Supreme Court ObamaCare Ruling? We can still reclaim our freedoms.”
They are truly in full freakout and meltdown mode. I don’t think they were even this mad when the ACA actually passed – probably because they were hoping for something like this to go their way. No, I won’t actually click on any of the articles, but the titles and shorters are delicious enough.
Think my favorite is this one, though:
“Did President Obama Just Win Re-Election? Four reasons why the SCOTUS decision on Obamacare might give the president’s re-election chances a big boost.”
NO PRE-ORDAINED GUARANTEE OF VICTORY IS THEFT!
“Did President Obama Just Win Re-Election?”
Wow … PJM actually referred to Obama as “President,” for real?!?
It’s official.
“Your Own Private 21 Tax Salute: The clock is ticking on ObamaCare, the mother, grandmother, and great aunt of all taxes.”
If you never paid taxes of various kinds, and understood them only in some abstract sense, and very dimly at that, you might write this sentence and mean it. You’d need to know ObamaCare as a placeholder noun, bereft of meaning.
The “X, Y, and Z of all taxes” construction should be done better, or not at all. Not to mention the 21 gun salute thing. Lo, a human named Robert Kimball produced this sentence and declared it good. I feel as yucky and alienated as a Watcher Out of Time.
It’s official.
Glenn Beck’s face about covers it.
Their reactions just feel different this time. When we passed the ACA, it was all “YOU THINK IT’S OVER? IT’LL NEVER BE OVER! I’LL GET YOU NEXT TIME!” That’s been going around this time too, but it feels like there’s a lot more depression and resignation mixed in. Less “Wolverines!” and more “We’re doomed!”
Just thought you’d like to see what I have to put up with at work. I copied this from the airline pilot forums.
Here’s a link to the original:
http://www.airlinepilotforums.com/cargo/68388-interesting-drone-article.html#post1222039
Sub, jim, DKW, Lurking Canadian: If you come in contact with any of these illegal immigrants flooding your borders and stealing your jobs and getting all that free health care and welfare, I hope you treat them accordingly. I suggest you build a dang fence.
I’m going to push for a law that all obnoxious white people with bad hair will need to present citizenship papers on demand.
Glenn Beck’s face about covers it.
Now I want to print up some motel-toilet-seat wraps with Beck’s face next to “Sanitized for your protection.”
Hey Sadlies, just back from job training on how to sell wind-up clacker teeth, nose candy dispensers & etc. and had to share this story from the road trip:
On the way back home yesterday, in the wake of our glorious victory, I stopped to fill up at Sulphur Springs, Texas, where gas is currently going for the low low price of $2.93 per gallon. While I was filling up, a black gentleman walks up to look at the pump and says, “I just want to check what they’re getting for premium since it’s $2.93 for regular.” We start up a conversation along with some folks at the next pump over – the guy says he’s from Oklahoma and gas is still way higher there; the woman at the next pump over says it’s been going for $3.29 in Dallas, I remark that it’s just under $3 in Arkansas, and the guy from Oklahoma is getting agitated because it’s so much higher where he’s from. Finally I said “it’s amazing what having the president announce he’s going to investigate speculation in the oil market will do for prices, isn’t it? They started going down the very next week, and so far, they’re down by a dollar.” The guy from Oklahoma vigorously agrees, and looking out of the corner of my eye I can see I’m getting the stink-eye from pretty much every Texan filling up around me, I suppose for the cardinal sin of letting on to the black guy that I didn’t consider the president to be illegitimate because he’s black. Or whatever. I suppose the only reason none of them went full wingnut on me is that they were still reeling from the shocked butthurt of the SC decision. But it did effectively end the conversation with everyone other than myself and dude from OK.
nose candy dispensers
Is coke still a going concern?
.
When we passed the ACA, it was all “YOU THINK IT’S OVER? IT’LL NEVER BE OVER! I’LL GET YOU NEXT TIME!” That’s been going around this time too, but it feels like there’s a lot more depression and resignation mixed in
You think it’s beginning to actually finally fully sink in that a shiny new round of fragging other folks’ kids for a cheap thrill war-chubby, funnelling MOAR gratuitous cosmic fucktons of graft & bailout dosh to the usual criminal corporatist detritus unto infinity, mandatory school sermons as to how a totally civilization-destroying Armageddon is both unavoidable & beautiful or why Darwin was possessed by Satan, & weekly visits from the cheerful speculum-jockeys of Supreme Elder Romney’s GodLaw™ Uterus Police isn’t exactly a delectable menu to be offering to Amerika in 2012?
Some might argue they’re thoroughly enjoying shitting in the republic’s cornflakes (& its future) far too much to even so much as slow down, let alone stop. Some might also very much prefer to see that tendency cease indefinitely.
Lucidity has consequences.
Naw, jim, they won’t change. The ones who, during those town hall meetings, screamed “they’re not listening to us!” when what was actually goingon was they weren’t getting their way, are true believers. Lucidity is not one of their virtues – not to imply they have any virtues to begin with.
There are a couple spots of sunshine though. Independents are slightly more approving of the SC decision than not. And about 50% now think the Rs are deliberately sabotaging the recovery, which they are. One can hope that strategy will turn out to be a self-hoisting petard of awesome potency.
Fuck! Teh Ho swapped my glasses for the rose tinted pair! Never mind the above.
I suppose the only reason none of them went full wingnut on me is that they were still reeling from the shocked butthurt of the SC decision. But it did effectively end the conversation with everyone other than myself and dude from OK.
They weren’t protected by the anonymity of the internet.
BTW, the ONLY thing that could make that pshop better?
If you could see the Hello Kitty panties pooled around his ankles.
Ugh, gotta work outside all day- summer fundraiser and all. I think I’m gonna f-in’ melt.
I need a job selling clacking teeth…
If you could see the Hello Kitty panties pooled around his ankles.
Pooling the panties…
Testing irrigation backflows in 108F… Yee-the-fuck-HAW.
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On a related note, Shorter: The Virgin Ben, “This is the greatest outrage since Dred Scott was forced to accept free room and board!”
Actual Quote which is sillier:
“This is the greatest destruction of individual liberty since Dred Scott. This is the end of America as we know it. No exaggeration.”
http://littlegreenfootballs.com/article/40546_Health_Care_Mandate_Upheld_by_Supreme_Court?tw_p=twt
Panty pool doesn’t pay as well as the regular kind, but it sure as hell is more fun!
Panty pool doesn’t pay as well as the regular kind
Regular = pocket?
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Also too http://tbogg.firedoglake.com/2012/06/28/wingnut-classics-illustrated/
Just finished reading the Fortune article linked from here. I wasn’t sure what to think about the Fast-n-Furry-ous “controversy” before but I sure am now.
SPOILER ALERT: It’s a fucking Republican witch hunt. Again.
“This is the greatest destruction of individual liberty since Dred Scott.”
Does this mean that in 140 years there’s going to be a controversial artist named ACA?
Ahem.
“Fast-n-Furry-ous”
I dunno what would constitute a federal furry sting operation, or how it could go horribly wrong, but there seems to be comedic potential in the idea.
I would love to see a zombie type horror film, but with furries instead. “shoot him in the head its the only way to stop ’em!”, or “once they’ve yiffed you, you only got live 3-4 hours before your’re sewing your own fursona!”
there seems to be comedic potential in the idea.
There was, but not in the way you’re thinking.
I would love to see a zombie type horror film, but with furries instead. “shoot him in the head its the only way to stop ‘em!”, or “once they’ve yiffed you, you only got live 3-4 hours before your’re sewing your own fursona!”
THAT is SHEER fucking GENIUS.
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Just finished reading the Fortune article linked from here. I wasn’t sure what to think about the Fast-n-Furry-ous “controversy” before but I sure am now.
SPOILER ALERT: It’s a fucking Republican witch hunt. Again.
I read that too and as well as “Golly gee willikers, the Republicans were lying????” The thing that was most disturbing was the internal strife in the ATF team. What fucking awful people, “Mah authoritah is moar important than catching the bad guys” and suspects who turned out to be FBI informants? No one would believe it in a movie,
THAT is SHEER fucking GENIUS.
Yes, but what if the furry scene peters out before it gets made?
What am I saying, it’s probably gonna metastatize & rule the world.
A wayward astronaut will heard to say, “you damned furry … furries!”
So if hate witch Malkkkin receives any government assistance for that fire situation surrounding her home, she’s going to be drug tested and vaginally probed first, right?
Oh, RWW, now I have to schedule another ECT session.
Indeed this was the death of individual liberty. I hope you all like Canadian-style waiting lists and some federal dipshit denying you life saving care because its just too expensive and you’re too old anyway.
Even the Canadians, under Stephen Harper, are starting to abandon socialized medicine, and the NHS in the UK is being privatized bit by bit.
Meanwhile we are going backwards
a federal furry sting operation
I imagine that would involve a platypus.
I hope you all like Canadian-style waiting lists and some federal dipshit denying you life saving care because its just too expensive and you’re too old anyway.
I imagine I’d like it every bit as well as some for-profit dipshit denying me coverage because I’m poor. Funny how Canadians are overall pretty damned satisfied with their miserable, horrible health care coverage. Dumbass.
The thing that was most disturbing was the internal strife in the ATF team.
Well that and the lack of support and help from the federal prosecutors. “Yeah, we’re not going to try to prosecute that, come back with more evidence.”
Then why is the current Canadian government, both at the federal and provincial level, increasingly privatizing their system bit by bit? The UK is doing the same. There is now a nascent but booming for private healthcare system in the UK.
Yeah and the gun (not) laws in AZ. Phew I like this socialanist hell-hole sometimes
The power has been out here in Columbus since yesterday. They’re saying it could be 5 – 7 days. This sucks.
Indeed this was the death of individual liberty.[…] the NHS in the UK is being privatized bit by bit.
Individual liberty: dead, or just having a wee lie down?
There is now a nascent but booming for private healthcare system in the UK.
“Nascent,” is it?
Hey, we have an expert here!
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“It’s well known that Roberts, unfortunately for him, has suffered from epileptic seizures. Therefore he has been on medication. Neurologists will tell you that medication used for seizure disorders, such as epilepsy, can introduce mental slowing, forgetfulness and other cognitive problems. And if you look at Roberts’ writings you can see the cognitive disassociation in what he is saying.”
– Michael “Ooga Booga” Savage quoted at Salon
Of course government services have never been privatized anywhere for any reason but because privatization is better and cheaper for the citizens.
There are no historical examples of powerful interests seeking privatization of government services or assets because doing so would benefit them alone. Such people bray the loudest and longest for privatization because they care alot. Their pro-privatization expenditures are a form of charity, a gift to us all, and not merely selfish investments they hope to see repaid many times over.
/snark off.
I have decided that since corporations are people, I am going to look up all the corporations that are based in Arizona and order anything they have that might be useful to me. When the bills come I will then refuse to pay them until they can come up with a valid birth certificate or passport to prove they are US citizens. If they fail to do so, I will call Jan Brewer and demand they be arrested and deported!
Then why is the current Canadian government, both at the federal and provincial level, increasingly privatizing their system bit by bit?
I could address the provincial part, if you told me which province you were talking about.
At the federal level, the answer is easy. Stephen Harper is a US-style conservative, ideologue and control freak. The nationwide electorate is split into three roughly equal pieces. About 33% of the population votes for Harper because they hate taxes, dark-skinned people and fags. The rest of the population votes for ANYBODY BUT FUCKING HARPER, but because the Liberals and NDP can’t get their shit together and unify, Harper wound up with parliamentary majority, which allows him to do whatever he likes for the next four years or so.
I’m not going to say “nobody” voted Conservative because they want to privatize healthcare nationally, but probably you could fit them all into a phone booth, or a board room at the Fraser Institute.
Oh, and speaking as a Canadian who recently survived a life-threatening illness absolutely free of charge…yeah, you can keep your “freedom” with my blessing.
Well summarized LC. Speaking as someone whose family and friends have had some serious surgery in the last 4 years, We are fine with socialnism, thanks
I have also been waiting a very long time for the Tea Party Clowns and their pet congress critters to start screaming for the privatization of the FDIC and FLIC federal insurance programs. I mean, after all, it’s all sociilesm and evil gubmint run insurance programs. And we all know that the gubmint can’t do insurance any where near as efficiently as the private sector. Why are those poor ol’ banksters mandated to have federal insurance? Sounds uncostitushanal to me!
FSLIC.
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Is there anyone who thinks, had Obama failed to pass health care, that Romney wouldn’t be running promising to achieve EXACTLY what we got? With conservatives cheering for exactly what they now decry?
Is there anyone who thinks, had Obama failed to pass health care, that Romney wouldn’t be running promising to achieve EXACTLY what we got? With conservatives cheering for exactly what they now decry?
Likely, at least.
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FSLIC.
What are you, a federal insurance pendant* or something?
* I just spell it that way to further annoy pedants.
What are you, a federal insurance pendant* or something?
Har! I have to search for ways to contribute, y’know. 😉
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Someone just e-mailed ma a nice pshop based on the movie poster for Abraham Lincoln Vampire Killer. This one features Mitt Romney Job Killer. It is very well done. I did a quick Google so I could add a link, but was unable to find it.
Har! I have to search for ways to contribute, y’know. 😉
And I do my best to help out by supplying a constant barrage of typos. 🙂
E-mail me that photoshop, and I’ll host it for ya.
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The power came back on. We’re doing the Snoopy dance here.
We’re doing the Snoopy dance here.
Do do do
Do do do
Do do
Do do do do
Dah dah dah dah dah dah
Dah dah dah dah dah dah
I’m gonna do the poontang dance, and see if it works any better than Rick Perry’s multi-million dollar prayer rally.
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I seem to have a talent for finding the dead zones at S,N!
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I seem to have a talent for finding the dead zones at S,N!
JP, you are likely to be eaten by a grue…
Dead? This is when it’s best!!
Whoa, leave your fantasies out of it, old chum!
Christ, another coattail-riding legacy schmuck deciding to bag some tea. I heard about this idiot in an e-mail from a wingnut former co-worker. The grifters are trying to get “Sheriff Joe” some cashola by flogging “Fast and Furious”.
A goddamn sucker’s born every minute.
not the most reverential nickname for your coke dealer
nose candy dispenser
not the most reverential nickname for your coke dealer
Independent pharmaceutical sales contractor
Entrepreneur.
AND job creator!
Woohoo! *runs naked through thread* Mine! ALL MINE!
Mine! ALL MINE!
Relevant:
Provider of greenhouse gas-free energy.
Wake up, y’all.
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Christ, another coattail-riding legacy schmuck deciding to bag some tea.
Here’s an (The?) e-mail from JPS IV.
Third-gen legacy schmuck.
Are you Easterners dead from the heat?
Gotta love how “patriot” JPS IV thinks it’s Marine “Corp,” not “Corps.” Maybe he thinks they’re real capitalists.
Not dead but experiencing something of a yen for the fjords.
Keep this up, and I’ll rub pixels of my sweaty moobs across your screens!
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Alive and well but a tad depressed of a Sunday evening. Cold, bored and nothing to tell you. Small sigh.
I’m not dead yet!
Yay Major…was just reading about your situation. I guess we got lucky and had that weather pass to the north, or not get started until it was west of us.
I did find evidence of rain this morning, and thought, what the hell is this?
…
Jeffraham, what did we possibly do to deserve that?
…
Oh and the final of the Euro is just about to start.
…
And now I will take a naked lap around the place…
…
weeeeeeeeee!!!!
…
I’m in the Florida panhandle managing a blueberry harvest and it’s just regular hot here, mid-nineties. No power failures. My brother was driving up I-81 through all that storminess and said it was impressive.
El Manq, I didn’t know that they grew blueberries in FL. not that I am surprised, just thought of them as a more northern plant. We are at body temperature with healthy humidity in south central indiana.
…
Jeffraham, what did we possibly do to deserve that?
Abandoning me here, by myself!
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Hurry-cayne done knocked ova mah char-coal greyulh!
Abandoning me here, by myself!
We’ve all been there at one time or another, though I have never considered to respond with the Nuclear option.
…
I just missed the first goal, but thanks to the replay tech i got to see it ESP1 ITA 0.
…
we have not yet hit ninety degrees here in mn, but it is effing hot out there…hubbkf and i are spending the day in of doors…also, too…it’s noisy out there what with teh fourth right around the corner and south dakota with it’s legal fireworks too…
Oh, hey. Go, Espana !
2-0 ESP
…
So, Spain is going for the European championship twice record, huh? Great work! And the World Cup is theirs also, too.
Man Italy is getting SPANKED.
Spain just scored its fourth goal. What a thumping.
Wow. Left the severe storms of DC to reach the severe storms of rhode island. Wtf. Is it me?
Left the severe storms of DC to reach the severe storms of rhode island.
Are you in Providence?
Really close. About 10 minutes outside our new Newport-area home.
That’s a nice area. I usually drive down to Newport when I have a weekend layover in Providence.
My bras are blue.
whoa…twins hit 4 home runs today…they are on their way to winning their third game in two days…wth?
Good for bbkf, who is an American & watching baseball instead of decadent Euro “football.”
Major Kong, is there anywhere you havent been? Occupational perk, I guess.
Only sport I watch is dressage.
VS, stay inside, or Mike Wankum may be reporting about you:
Whenever I watch dressage, they call me a Peeping Tom.
Fucking lightning! How does it work?!
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Major Kong, is there anywhere you haven’t been? Occupational perk, I guess.
I haven’t seen much of Asia. Guam is about as far West as I’ve made it. I’ve never been to Africa and I’ve only seen parts of South America.
But yes, it has been my great privilege to see places that others have only read about and I count myself very fortunate.
I’ve been to paradise but I’ve never been to me.
Happy Canada Day to all DominionSadlies.
Dominion the 145-year-old hipster – did the face-eating psycho thing more than a year before bath salts were a meme.
Obligatory Canuckistan Content goes right about here!
Good for bbkf, who is an American & watching baseball instead of decadent Euro “football.”
ho, ho! i even drank a fine amurkin alcoholic beverage and we also shot off a super loud firework…we also went to the inlaw’s for dinner which included grilled meat, cole slaw and corn on the cob…this must stop or before you know it i will be inquiring how to get my free hoveround…
This post is Zalgon 26 McGee approved.
Happy Canada Day to all you Canuckstanis !
May you have an even happier Canada Day when you get rid of that neocon jerk, Harper.
Are Canadians in general still happy to be a Dominion or do you have an active Republic-wanting faction, like Oz?
Man Italy is getting SPANKED.
We watched the game sitting in an outdoor cafe/pizzeria in a campo in Venice. We’d been here the night Italy beat Germany, and the place was hopping. Waiters and staff all craning their necks to see the TV, everyone shouting and cheering.
What a contrast! By about half-time, when it was quite obvious what the outcome would be, suddenly none of the Italians were paying attention to the TV. It was like, “Game? What game?”
three teenagers were shocked by lightning in Rhode Island.
They must have lived extremely sheltered lives.
Are Canadians in general still happy to be a Dominion or do you have an active Republic-wanting faction, like Oz?
Once you knock over one dominion, the rest tend to fall over in orderly rows.
Are Canadians in general still happy to be a Dominion or do you have an active Republic-wanting faction, like Oz?
I think for most people the issue is very unimportant. Even after the prorogation mess, people were mad at the GG, but I don’t remember anybody blaming the dead hand of the monarchy.
the dead hand of the monarchy.
our free hand of the marketplace scoffs at your dead hand of the monarchy…
They must have lived extremely sheltered lives.
Insulated from reality, you might say.
Once you knock over one dominion, the rest tend to fall over in orderly rows.
I thought the dominion theory was debunked in Viet Nam.
Hey, guess what? Today’s Welcome Back to Pottersville’s 4th anniversary.
My personal dominion theory is that they make shitty pizza.
But they make great elephant scabs.
We may not have any “fatted calf” for the prodigal, but there’s always plenty of POOP!
Why do think I came back? For the snark, sure. But the POOP! Ahh, the POOP.
Insulated from reality, you might say.
Some may say “protected” from reality. It being too real to deal with sometimes…
My personal dominion theory is that they make shitty pizza.
Dominiono’s Pizza?
Some may say “protected” from reality. It being too real to deal with sometimes…
one word: alcohol…
What about Dominatrix’s pizza?
and way to come back and break the thread, esteev! nicely done!
Why is everything italicized? Oh, WordPress. Somethings never change.
Sometimes alcohol is the answer!
Sometimes alcohol is the answer!
what do you mean, sometimes? which i would have italicized, but oh well…
Well if I can’t break the bank, I’ll try for the thread!
My apologies. Where were we?
I thought we were on vacation in Italicy.
I thought we were on vacation in Italicy.
gosh, i wish i would have thought to bring my umlaut!
I hear the weather in Boldivia is wonderful this time of year.
i am trying to utilize a favicon that i made, but stupid wordpress (or my stupid theme) won’t let this happen…any thoughts sadlieswhoarewaysmarterthanmewhenitcomestocomputers?
All of the opinions expressed here are slanted.
I would have expected that the bias would have been to the left
All of the opinions expressed here are slanted.
Such bias on display!Bite me, HT.
Now no one can complain that Sadly, No! only writes to the left.
Or is the writing supposed to look normal because our entire worldview leans left?
So have my rusty tag skillz inadvertently made us centrists?
???p?sn?uo? ?sn? ?,? ?ou
???p?sn?uo? ?sn? ?,? ?ou/i
!!!111!!!?
???p?sn?uo? ?sn? ?,? ?ou
No thanks, Ive had my coffee.
I didn’t break it. Nobody saw me. You can’t prove a thing.
g dang it! i love living in the boonies…
breaking news in big stone county: six head of cattle are on the loose…if you find them, please call…
They were last seen boarding a flight to India…..
“breaking news in big stone county: six head of cattle are on the loose…if you find them, please call…”
I’ve herd nothing about them……….
“breaking news in big stone county: six head of cattle are on the loose…if you find them, please call…”
Maybe we should organize a steakout……..
Relevant:
“breaking news in big stone county: six head of cattle are on the loose…if you find them, please call…”
Area china shop owners are requested to close for the day………….
It could be the work of the Bovine Liberation Front.
I see your big stone county news and raise you BIG news.
He had heard the man was told to stay in the terminal and not board the plane. Clark saw him sitting outside the gate as he boarded.
bet this d00d feels dumb now…
six head of cattle are on the loose
I bet they’re headed for Canada because of the individual mandate.
Oh wait, they’re probably smarter than that.
bet this d00d feels dumb now…
Jesus Christ, he didn’t make an accusation, he didn’t even make a statement, he just asked a joking question. The only person who should feel dumb is whatever idiot employee escalated it. The fact that they publicly blamed and punished the passenger for it is outrageous.
bet this d00d feels dumb now…
Pilots are, like, so divas.
bet this d00d feels dumb now…
i say this only as one who has flapped her yap at the wrong time/place/person and have been deeply chagrined at the results…
Nu thred