Ooh…Elephant Talk! That works on a couple of levels, well done.

I can almost feel sorry for Bill Buckley. He must feel like a community pillar whose son walks around town doing shitty gangsta impressions or talking in leetspeek.

“My goodness, Jeremy, what are we to do with you?”

“Yo dawg, don’t be frontin’! Ya’ll need to deep-dope chill with a kind bud! Lawlzers! Poor people suck!”

So rare to see King Crimson lyrics. Thank you. That said, I think this bit is more apt;

Babble
burble
banter
bicker bicker bicker
Brouhaha
balderdash
ballyhoo

As a libertarian, I don’t think doctors should be convicted of drug trafficking for prescribing pain medication unwittingly to drug abusers.

Dammit, what is this Sullum guy doing at Townhall? Ever since “Shorter Jacob Sullum” has made its appearance, the summary has implied a not-completely-batshit point of view. The man has even written a column noting that an unconstitutional powergrab by the executive is still wrong if the executive is Republican. Again, there’s probably something loopy I’m missing in the original article but I can agree with the basic point above. That doesn’t sound like a competent doctor, but it doesn’t sound like a case for a drug trafficking conviction either.

MTV should be ashamed of itself.

But can I think Colson is still batshit crazy?

I’m sure it’s been asked many times in the past — how do you guys read these columns (or even skim them) in such volume and frequency and have not yet shot yourselves in the head? I want to do that just by reading the names of the columnists BEFORE I even read their content.

I think you should consider drinking every night until you pass out — I hear it kills fewer brain cells than what you do in this exercise.

lookin’ out for ya,

ooo. I read the Colson column. Batshit isn’t the word here.

He does display the standard rightwing lack of self awareness though; decrying thecoarsening of culture while somehow avoiding the role he and his buddies played in starting the whole coarsening of the culture at the highest levels, all those years ago.

(expletive deleted) Chuck, you (expletive deleted) sniffing (expletive deleted) bag.

Shorter John Stossel: Schools should be run more like a Costco.

So… they should pay better than prevailing wages, provide decent benefits, and allow unions?

The fact that MTV should be ashamed of itself is good for Bush and the Republicans in the upcoming elections.

Jeez. Ok, I understand that Muslims scare them. And I get it that gay peeps terrify them. And it’s clear that mexicans frighten them. And sure, they never got over it when society decided that racial bigotry wasn’t cool. I get all that, I understand they live every day traumatized that life in America has become something other than a fifties “Leave it to Beaver” fantasy. But here’s what I don’t get. I don’t get why after all this time they are still so strung out over Janet Jackson’s boob. Was it a particularly scary boob? It sure looked like a normal boob to me. I like to think I’m a bit of an expert on boobs, and I got over Janet’s right one in about thirty seconds. I’d like to somehow get a message to America’s Right Wing Culture Warriors that it was just a boob. One boob. Out of a possible two! On one woman’s chest. On TV. For a couple seconds. Like three years ago. You can begin to heal now, guys…

mikey

Why we don’t believe you
By Mary Katharine Ham
Monday, August 28, 2006

Does the mainstream press ever wonder why conservatives distrust them so much?

If so, they need look no further than the “fauxtography� scandals of the last couple of weeks. Conservative bloggers have been hard at work sniffing out suspected fakery and staging in the photos sent back on the newswires from the Israel/Hezbollah conflict, and the investigation got pretty smelly.

First, there was Reutersgate, in which the international news organization had to pull a photo and fire a freelance photographer because he clumsily Photoshopped thicker smoke into the skyline of Beirut.

This incident got bloggers wondering what other photographic evidence of Israeli aggression had been Photoshopped or staged into existence, and just how complicit the news media was in the fakery. They came up with a photo by the same Reuters photographer, in which he had added flares to a photograph of an Israeli plane, and called them missiles.

But that was just the beginning. There was Green Helmet Guy, who seemed to be ever-present at the sites of Israeli “atrocities,� always making the most of the evidence of civilian casualties. He even played director to international news crews and photographers, showing them how to get the best shots of Lebanese casualties.

Then there was the “Passion of the Toys,� in which brand-new toys—poignant symbols of childhood innocence—seemed to keep popping up, perfectly framed by the destruction of war, yet strangely unscathed by it.

Oh, but it doesn’t stop there. Later came the “unluckiest multiple home owner in Lebanon,� photographed on several occasions, weeping in front of her several homes, bombed by several Israeli airstrikes. Then, we have the New York Times’ pieta, in which a rescue worker was carelessly identified as a victim of an airstrike when, in fact, he had been injured while working in the area. And, the flaming tire atrocity. And, the time Hezbollah bombed an Israeli ship in Australia.

Finally, this week, there was the ambulance attack that maybe wasn’t. There’s strong evidence to suggest that the two ambulances allegedly hit by Israeli airstrikes on July 23 were not exactly pulverized by missiles, as we were led to believe.

Reuters fired its fake photographer, which was the correct response to such deception. But, beyond that, there has not been much comeuppance for photographers and reporters involved in airbrushed, faked, and staged news.

The mainstream media’s response to the allegations from blogs has been more along the lines of Greg Mitchell’s, editor of Editor & Publisher, a trade magazine whose mission it is to cover “all aspects of the North American newspaper industry, including business, newsroom, advertising, circulation, marketing, technology, online and syndicates.�

Mitchell’s response to accusations from bloggers—instead of answering the charges and refuting evidence—was to get very defensive, claim that “rightwing bloggers� were only attempting to smear photojournalists as a group, and then proceed to smear rightwing bloggers as a group for daring to point out the dishonesty of some photojournalists, and raise questions about how business is conducted in the Middle East.

You can see Mitchell’s response to the accusations, here and here. You can see the deconstruction thereof, here and here. All are worth a read to really understand how the mainstream media deals with accusations of fraud, and how cavalierly it tosses aside some of its most avid consumers’ concerns. Here’s a typical paragraph from one of Mitchell’s pieces:

Time does not permit a point by point documentation of the dozens of ludicrous, or at least completely unproven, examples of doctored or staged or otherwise manipulated photos on the Web. Have no fear, I will soon return to this subject, but in the meantime, feel free to plunge into the blogosphere. If you go deeply enough, you may feel you are back on the Grassy Knoll. One of the most-linked sites in this controversy, EU Referendum, goes so far as to suggest that a kind of Hollywood “film-set” was improvised at the site of the Qana killings “for the benefit of both Hezbollah and the media.”

I would highly recommend you go through the links I’ve listed above and decide for yourself whether the accusations are “ludicrous,� particularly the video of a Hollywood film-set improvised at the site of the Qana killing, “for the benefit of both Hezbollah and the media.�

Instead of addressing concerns and refuting evidence, Mitchell calls bloggers a bunch of Grassy Knoll-ers intent on discrediting “the media as a whole.� This is not the way to win trust with your audience.

Mitchell then went on to discredit himself within the space of just a couple hours.

On Friday, the Confederate Yankee blog brought attention to a column Mitchell had written in 2003, in which he confessed to making up news as a young reporter. He had been sent out to do a story on Niagara Falls, and found himself unable to talk to tourists to get quotes. So, he sat on a bench and made the quotes up. He confessed his journalistic sin in the wake of the Jayson Blair scandal.

Many other blogs picked up on the 2003 column, suggesting that Mitchell might be sympathetic to faked news because he himself had been a faker.

Several hours after Confederate Yankee’s post went up, that blogger noticed the text of the 2003 article had been changed. The lede had gone from this:

Since the press seems to be in full-disclosure mode these days, I want to finally come clean. Back when I worked for the Niagara Falls (N.Y.) Gazette (now the Niagara Gazette), our city editor asked me to find out what tourists thought about an amazing local event: Engineers had literally “turned off� the famous cataracts, diverting water so they could shore up the crumbling rock face. Were visitors disappointed to find a trickle rather than a roar? Or thrilled about witnessing this once-in-a-lifetime stunt?

To this (additions in bold):

Since the press seems to be in full-disclosure mode these days, I want to finally come clean. Back in 1967, when I was 19 and worked for the Niagara Falls (N.Y.) Gazette (now the Niagara Gazette) as a summer intern, our city editor asked me to find out what tourists thought about an amazing local event: Engineers had literally “turned off” the famous cataracts, diverting water so they could shore up the crumbling rock face. Were visitors disappointed to find a trickle rather than a roar? Or thrilled about witnessing this once-in-a-lifetime stunt?

The column had been edited, without notation, within a couple of hours of bloggers calling attention to it, to emphasize Mitchell’s youth and inexperience at the time of his ethical faux pas. Luckily, several bloggers and the Internet preserved the original piece.

So, it seems someone went back and altered a three-year-old column to reflect more positively on Mitchell, once it got a bit of attention from the “Grassy Knoll,� “rightwing bloggers.� Makes all those “ludicrous� accusations of dishonesty of the mainstream press seem not so ludicrous, doesn’t it?

Mitchell now has not just his industry’s malfeasance to answer for, but his own malfeasance, which he admitted to in a 2003 column, and which was then compounded when someone altered his three-year-old copy to protect him.

Changing copy three years after it has been published, without providing a “correction� or “clarification� note, is entirely unethical by the very standards of the newspaper industry Mitchell is charged with covering. Dan Riehl, another blogger, has evidence that Mitchell may have been altering copy in his latest E&P column, as well.

Rightwing bloggers are predisposed to distrust the media, as are most conservatives. The fauxtographers and defenders like Mitchell are giving us no reason to be encouraged. The mainstream press’ stock is in credibility. The right course is to answer, quickly and thoroughly, any credible charges against them, so as to preserve that stock.

Instead, with the notable exceptions of David Perlmutter and Jim Pinkerton, the mainstream media seems content to blame it all on the Grassy Knoll while half of its readers find news coverage is greener on the other side.

This is why we don’t believe you.

Just in case anybody asks, I so didn’t get that King Crimson reference, no siree.

Shorter Kathleen Parker: If local governments handed out compact fluorescent light bulbs, we might be able to forgo further sacrifices in energy consumption.

Commie.

(Seriously? I think every building should be outfitted with solar panels. By mandate if necessary. Solar power may not be enough for large power companies, but if everyone had panels on their houses, it would certainly lighten up the strain on the grid, lessen our uses of fossile fules/nuclear power, and be a lot cheaper in the long run. When I get a house, we’re having solar panels put in.)

I agree TC, “batshit” is not the word, although “bullshit” would certainly work.

MTV is the easiest and most obvious target for cultural wingnuts to bitch about, despite the fact that its products (including the channel and its shows as well as the artists they promote) are distributed by companies owned by the very same people who hold the purse strings of the Republican party.

Not only that, but the fact that MTV has been successful because its sleazy and lowbrow programming appeals to lots of people is a perfect example of the free market in action, the same free market that gives all these wingnuts wet dreams. Greed is the one variable they never assume, and then when it materializes as a culture of excess, they pretend to be outraged.

What is more representative of the free market than some spoiled rotten fifteen year old bitching at her mom because the $10,000 dollar dress she’s going to wear to her $200,000 Sweet sixteen party makes her look fat? And do you think that those are the children of Democrats running around Laguna Beach?

Colson just wants to bitch at MTV, and he doesn’t even explain how it’s all liberals fault. God forbid he suggest that the people who run the megacorporation that owns MTV do something about their programming. After all, that might cut into their bottom line, which means less money for the Republican party, and less cash for ‘think tanks’ and crappy online opinion journals.

Um.. can you guys give Marie a guest post or something, so that she isn’t monopolizing the entire comments section? Not that we don’t love to hear from her, but that was long and dull, and not even her own words. It lacked that “down to earth” writing style we’ve all grown to admire.

Also, Travis, nice shorter on the Malkin column. It actually made me click over and read the column (for once), because I thought there’s no way that anyone, even someone as crazy as Malkin, could write a column like that. How naive I was.

Shorter Marie Jon’: I’m unaware that nobody reads my cut-and-pastes.

This is why we don’t believe you.

I WISH I understood this. Don’t believe us at all? Just don’t believe our photos?

Marie, instead of just pasting in an extremely one-sided and poorly thought out piece by the somewhat unhinged Mary Ham, why don’t you go ahead and explain to me why these photos matter? What does it mean? Does it mean that no innocents died in Lebanon? Does it mean that there was no bombing? That cluster bomblets aren’t still killing children? You guys keep pounding away at this as if it has some profound meaning. Pardon me for being a little slow on the uptake, but what point are you trying to make by repeatedly emphasizing doctored photos? Is the entire Right Wing now completely enraptured by journalistic integrity? If so, will you disown Bill O’Reilly? To me, independent photogs ‘Shopped their photos, got caught, got fired and life went on. Why is this still something worth yelling about?

mikey

Shorter Mary Katherine Ham: (was this really from Marie Jon’? Oh, nurse, it hurts right…here.”

I once saw a picture that was Photoshopped. Therefore, every picture that contradicts Republican talking points must be Photoshopped, because cameras are Liberal. Oh, and I came up with a leaden, stilted term for it that I would like you all to start using. Thank you.

Shorter Marie Jon’: I think someone cares why Mark Katherine Ham doesn’t believe the news.

Marie Jon’,

Since we know you are reading this, would you please, just this once, tell us what the heck that apostrophe is doing on your name?

You see, I have trouble taking your criticism of people’s writing seriously when your very name fails to follow any know rules of punctuation.

I can’t believe I’m the only pro-Williams man here. He makes perfect sense.

The only thing that was missing was a Kent Brockmanesque “Come on, people, it’s in Revelations!”

Stossel meant that schools should be run like Wal-mart. But Wal-mart isn’t exactly popular right now.

Oh, and read the comments to Stossel’s junk. Priceless!

Parents who home educate love their children immensely and love to teach them the best of the best.

No, Lee, a majority home-school so their kids don’t get exposed to science and other things that might conflict with their religious views.

X amount of money per student given to the teacher of the parents’ choice and we would see the incompotent teachers without classes

Too easy.

My daughter loves her all girl school because boys aren’t constantly misbehaving and posturing just to show off.

Riiiiiiight.

I refuse to destroy my kids, either spiritually, academically, or socially, by subjecting them to the incomptency and downright evil of the union-controlled government school system.

Did some teacher give this kid an “F” when he was little, or what?

Oh, man, why couldn’t Marie have posted Mary Katharine Ham’s previous column: “So You Think Social Conservatives Can’t Dance? They Really Can.”?

(No, seriously, that’s the title!)

At least some of us would have been tempted to read that one. C’mon Marie. Get to know your audience.

Why does Marie’s site have a picture of Jeff Bridges with a towel over his head?

shorter me: “I too would have a witty comment, but I’m busy peeling the cookie layers off my Big Ed’s.”

Shorter Robbie: if you think Malkin’s screed on ambulances is crazy, she devoted half her day fabricating a Bay Area hit-and-run spree as a terrorist attack.

Shorter Sleshinger: I’ll rail on mortgage loans no one buys anymore.

Marie Jon’ said,
August 30, 2006 at 19:27

Why we don’t believe you
By Mary Katharine Ham
Monday, August 28, 2006

“…Rightwing bloggers are predisposed to distrust the media, as are most conservatives…�

That’s cute. So self-congratulatory. And so nonsensical.

Yes we’ve seen the keen and incisive treatment they’ve accorded the many distortions, omissions, slant, and outright lies we’ve heard so very often on Fox Spews (a “media” component). (eg, everyone else records Bush’s ratings in the shitter at 32%; Fox says “president’s support leveling off.â€?)

Your RW bloggers are the media, TOO. And same as everybody else, rightwing bloggers are sellin something. “Fair and balanced�? Just because they say so? Isn’t that exactly your gripe with accepting MSM at face value?

And incidentally, “conservatives� don’t exist. They were all purged from the Republican Party long ago, and if they exist at all, have gone into hiding.

Look up the definitions of “conservative� and “fascist.�

Marie, instead of just pasting in an extremely one-sided and poorly thought out piece by the somewhat unhinged Mary Ham, why don’t you go ahead and explain to me why these photos matter? What does it mean? Does it mean that no innocents died in Lebanon? Does it mean that there was no bombing? That cluster bomblets aren’t still killing children? You guys keep pounding away at this as if it has some profound meaning. Pardon me for being a little slow on the uptake, but what point are you trying to make by repeatedly emphasizing doctored photos? Is the entire Right Wing now completely enraptured by journalistic integrity? If so, will you disown Bill O’Reilly? To me, independent photogs ‘Shopped their photos, got caught, got fired and life went on. Why is this still something worth yelling about?

Mikey, forgive me if I am pounding on the obvious here, but the thing is, the wingnuts — or rather, their Rovian Puppetmasters — realize that the photo doctoring doesn’t matter, because the events really did happen and really were horrific. So they are playing “Look, a monkey!” with the small subset of photos that were or may have been manipulated. They — by which I mean the Rove-level Controllers, not necessarily the Marie Jon’-level operatives — are skillful at diverting attention this way. Put the press on the defensive, keep the noise level high to dorwn out the signal, and pretty soon, you’ve distracted the public from the underlying reality that is so bad for your cause.

Two sad reasons why this works so well: (1) The public is susceptible to it. Being distracted is easy; weaning yourself away from the distraction to focus on the real issues, that’s hard. It takes critical thinking, a resource for which the U.S. appears to have no strategic reserve. (2) There is always someone willing to do something stupid, like doctoring a photo for effect, and hand them the ammunition they need for their “ooh, shiny!” shotgun.

When are you guys going to get around to trying this one?

Hey Dan. That makes sense, in a more general explanatory sense. But it really doesn’t answer my question. If it’s all about “Look, a Monkey!” kind of distraction, they can do so much better than doctored wire photos. I mean, if I was on their team I’d be using israel’s “right to self defense” and the respective histories of Israel (Within hours of being overrun in ’73) and Hezbollah (20 years ago resposible for some serious bombings). I mean, it’s at least in the ballpark. They keep hammering away at these photos, and it sounds stupid because it’s all intro with no conclusion. If the presentation of doctored photos is important, then it shouldn’t be dificult to say WHY it’s important. Or maybe it’s just me…

mikey

L’heure de Vérité a sonné

Jon’ is French. My names Not Marie John.

By the way, I’m not going to have much time to chat with on the blog. I’m back in class . I also work in ER. I came back to the blog as courtesy to Brad and Gavin. They gracious loves to display my picture. You might catch me to WBAL radio from time to time. I’m invited as a guest. I hope to talk about the “Freedom Walk “in remembrance of 9/11. I also write for the Blue and The Gold Star families of Modesto. http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2005/09/11/AR2005091100508.html
— http://www.americasupportsyou.mil/freedomwalk/ _ http://www.renewamerica.us/columns/jon/060820

I have given you excellent materials to listen or view. For gosh sakes, get back to loving your country as well as the “God this country was founded on.”

Later,
MJ

http://www.einnews.com/norway/newsfeed-norway-accidents

Marie Jon’ Now boarding: Air-Infidel Airlines 27 Aug 2006 05:41 GMT
… American roots breaks into his pitch as planes roar by and fly overhead: “This is … those blond-haired, blue-eyed, one-legged, vegetarian, oboe-playing, Lutheran Norwegians who everybody knows were definitely candidates … terrorists who strap bombs to themselves, or crash planes into buildings, but to the rest …

Whoa, MJ’ can speak Freedom!

Bet she doesn’t do that in her columns — great way to get fired….

If it’s all about “Look, a Monkey!� kind of distraction, they can do so much better than doctored wire photos. I mean, if I was on their team I’d be using israel’s “right to self defense� and the respective histories of Israel (Within hours of being overrun in ‘73) and Hezbollah (20 years ago resposible for some serious bombings).

Mikey, they do use those things to some extent, but those concepts do require some actual thought, so they are not suitable for all audiences. The whole point is about framing the “debate” (such as it is). If you can focus the discussion on the trivial, you don’t ever have to address the non-trivial.

OK, that’s not really MJ’ right? I know all the arguments here, but there is no way that “They gracious loves to display my picture.” was written by a native English speaker.

And Jon’ isn’t any sort of French I know. If it were really French, the name would be Marie-Jean, which would be fine, but even the Frenchies don’t go sticking random apostrophes at the end of words.

Furthermore, “God this country was founded on.â€? Like, a different God than other countries have been founded on? Cause that’s not what you hear in church much these days. I assume.

Mikey, they do use those things to some extent, but those concepts do require some actual thought, so they are not suitable for all audiences. The whole point is about framing the “debate� (such as it is). If you can focus the discussion on the trivial, you don’t ever have to address the non-trivial.

Well, you probably think that fags should teach our kids to be commies.

Actually, I’m a big fan of specialized education. Fags should teach our kids anal sex and cross dressing, while commies should teach wealth redistribution and Empowering the Proloteriat 101…

mikey

You’re right, Stacy. It would be Jean. Good catch there.

Then again, we have JonBenet but without an accent.

Whoa, MJ’ can speak Freedom!

Perhaps. But can she speak English?

MJ’: “I also work in ER.”

Which is why Noah Wiley went to Africa, got malaria, and died!

And now you know… The rest of the story.

Just for fun, I looked in my Petite Larousse dictionary (1794 pages of it) to see what Jon’ might be an abbreviation of. Here are the jon- words:
jonc
joncacees
jonchaie
jonchee
joncher
jonchets
jonction
jongler–to juggle
jonglerie
jongleur–minstrel
jonque–junk (as in Asian sailboat)
jonquille–narcissus flower

Hmmmm.

These are words with a D this time.

It would be Jean.

It would be, if she were male. Since she’s (supposedly) not, it would be Jeanne. And it would not be pronounced ‘jon’ anyway. So whoever that is doesn’t speak Freedom very well.

Eeps. I forgot to say that the Shorter Kathleen Parker actually inspired me to go over there to read the whole thing. Just to see if she was really that vacuous. And wonder of wonders, she was! Honestly, I’m such a fangirl of hers, I could almost see reading her work in every Clownhall. Well, I could see it if I were really high or something.

Thanks, Travis!

Actually, I’m a big fan of specialized education. Fags should teach our kids anal sex and cross dressing, while commies should teach wealth redistribution and Empowering the Proloteriat 101…

Just like a liberal. Suggest fags or commies and he automatically has the budget for both. No sir, fags OR commies, and no trying to sneak in a welfare queen.

Well, maybe so, but she has a positive impact on my jonque…

mikey

Some people of a theological bent see the current mess as a sign of God’s imminent apocalyptic plans for us. And they may well be right.

That is solid-gold comedy right there.

They gracious loves to display my picture. You might catch me to WBAL radio from time to time. I’m invited as a guest. … ”

Er, that’s they graciousLY love to display your picture. And we might catch you ON WBAL radio. Sheesh. Couldn’t they find someone with better grammar to write for TownHall?

Btw, we’re up to 2 for 2 w/ Jacob Sullum. It’s only a matter of time before he leaves the Republican party.

Bill O’Reilly: I am an independent American who sees fault on both the left and the right.

That’s today’s silver medal winner.

I also work in ER.

Bullshit. It’s Emergency Department, ED, and if you start nattering about “ER” they give you the ol’ STFU-eye. Mention “Dr. House” and they strap you on a gurney, roll you into the towel closet, and leave you there.

From Virgin Ben:

If the terrorists achieve global sharia, then they will have won. If they erect a mosque on the ruins of the World Trade Center, then they will have won. They will not stop until they achieve their goals. We must not stop until we have shattered their dreams forever.

This is what I don’t get. “Global sharia” — HOW? Exactly how are the Islamonaziüberpoopyfascists going to take over the world? Give me specifics here. If the INUPFs pose the same existential threat that the Axis powers did, then why isn’t the entire economy focused toward defeating them? Where’s the draft? Where are the victory gardens and the ration cards? Why is that all we’re asked to do is shop and vote Republican? If that’s all it takes to ward off the INUPF threat, then it must not be all that much of a threat after all.

Pick one or the other. It’s an existential crisis, requiring a meaningful commitment from all members of society, or it’s a war of choice, requiring no sacrifice from anyone other than those poor bastards getting shot at. (Not to mention the shooter-at-ers, and their “collateral damage.”) Plus — tax cut!

This is all very, very stupid.

V.Ben and I agree. Bipartisanship roolz!

If i ever read another Ben Shapiro article the terrorists will have won.

Shorter Marie Jon’: 1500 words… written by someone else.

Ha, Righteous Bubba, my logical skillz run rings around you; hire gay communists! You and your false dichotomies.