Mar
4

Don’t Tell Me, We’re About to Go Over a Huge Waterfall. Yep. Sharp rocks on the Bottom? Most Likely. Bring it on.




Posted at 1:08 by Cerberus

The True Face of Satan according to every wingnut everywhere according to the long-standing and deeply held beliefs that the’ve had since about 11 o’clock last monday.

Tina Korbe, Assistant Malkin at Hot Air:
Georgetown co-ed*: Please pay for us to have sex … We’re going broke buying birth control**

So when we last left the intrepid Republicans on the contraception debate, they were busy trying to faceplant themselves so hard, their noses were perfectly flat.

Well, while I was off being detained on rumors of Columbian drug running
dashing and intrepid in my regular job, the Right decided to double down on the fail train and go “missing track ahead? That’ll be no threat to Full Throttle!”

First they had their achingly bad “forum on contraception” completely made up of skeezy old uncles you’d expect to see in a police line-up of the local pedophiles. Then King Rushbo, Lord of the Drug Mountain decided to come up from snorting some coke of the ass of an 8-year old Guatemalan boy to try and steal Michelle Malkin and Andrew Breitbart’s shtick and decided to smear whatever poor unlucky bastard ended up trying to report the reality counter to the latest right-wing obsession in congress (and the organization of this is totally not at all harassment intended to prevent the other side from having adequate defense of their position on a national level, no no no).

Enter in Sandra Fluke, who pointed out the no shit in the debate that contraception, especially female contraception, can be a pretty weighty expense and burden on women. Lord Rushbo decides to dedicate his show to calling her a slut, gets blowback, and now all of Wingnuttia is fucked.

They need to defend their lord and master, distributor of the Talking Points, but the tiny vestigal organ in their brains dedicated to self-preservation keeps trying to tell them that the faster they abandon this whole contraception tangent, the better chance they have of being able to endure as Professional Women Haters going into the future. Sadly, for them, Wingnuttia just can’t help itself. The rocks call to them, they must jump.

But Cerberus, you cry. We know all this. The comment threads have been blowing up with conversation about this while you’ve been off having your colon searched for drugs being devastatingly beautiful and clever.

Yes, of course, but… hmmm… uh… look over there a distraction!

Crap, you’re still here. Okay, fine, yeah, I’m a little late to the party. For those of you who’d like to skip it, please go to the bottom, where we’ll have a free additional bonus shorter.

For the rest, let’s dig in.

At a hearing of the House Democratic Steering and Policy Committee yesterday, a single witness — Georgetown law student and “reproductive rights activist” Sandra Fluke — told sympathetic policy-makers that the administration’s so-called contraception mandate should stand … because her peers are going broke buying birth control.

“Forty percent of the female students at Georgetown Law reported to us that they struggled financially as a result of this policy (Georgetown student insurance not covering contraception),” Fluke reported.

It costs a female student $3,000 to have protected sex over the course of her three-year stint in law school, according to her calculations.

“Without insurance coverage, contraception, as you know, can cost a woman over $3,000 during law school,” Fluke told the hearing.

Which is proposterous, wha ha ho ho, for I, upon this giant hoard of money have never had want for contraceptives when I needed it. All I did was have one of my slave butlers or maids walk on all fours to wherever they go and bring me back all I need. And besides how much contraception do you really need when you already have the wet suit and two dildos?

Craig Bannister at CNSNews.com did the math

Yeah… about that math…


Craig Bannister, CNS News (for when the 700 club is too staffed with liberal faggots for your tastes):
Sex-Crazed Co-Eds Going Broke Buying Birth Control, Student Tells Pelosi Hearing Touting Freebie Mandate***

$3,000 for birth control in three years? That’s a thousand dollars a year of sex – and, she wants us to pay for it.

Yes, us. Where do you think the insurance companies forced to cover this cost get the money to pay for these co-eds to have sex? It comes from the health care insurance premiums you and I pay.

Yes of course, Craig dahling, you personally are responsible for the compensation packages every employee everywhere earns as part of their health insurance. Only wingnut dollars matter, doncha know? So, only wingnuts can complain about “their money” going to things they don’t like, like women being allowed to go outside without male guardians, and the existence of black people, whereas liberals aren’t allowed to complain about their “so-called” money in the system going to things like endless war, free giveaways to conservative bullshit organizations, and massive subsidies of conservative states, districts, and people failed by conservative ideology.

Well, who am I to get in the way of a successful bullshit flinging strategy? Pray, continue!

“For a lot of students, like me, who are on public interest scholarships, that’s practically an entire summer’s salary,” she complains.

So, they can earn enough money in just one summer to pay for three full years of sex.

Luckily women, being inorganic lifeforms operating only on the tears of men forcibly cuckolded by the watching of bad chick movies, have no need for ordinary human concerns like food, shelter, running water, etc… during those summer months when, you know, they aren’t receiving salary because they aren’t in school and thus this is their only money for surviving those months.

And protip, Mr. “Mathematician”, $3,000 dollars in a 3 month summer is about equivalent to a $12,000 annual salary. Sure, there are many, many young people doing worse thanks to your conservative economic policies over the last 30 years, but it’s not like she and her ilk are living high off the hog on the public dime. Also, you’re once again claiming ownership of the money someone earned by their own degrading dehumanizing sweat in dead-end temporary jobs as your own.

Do you also go into banks and claim that all the money in their vault is yours because you also have a checking account?

And, yes, they are full years – since that could translate into having sex nearly three times a day for three years straight, apparently.

How do you even figure? Female birth control pills and contraceptions aren’t taken by use, but rather by month. They cost the same whether you are getting railed in an endless train or you spend your days hugging a moe body pillow and weeping.

I mean, the fact that your “math” produced the figure of every single college girl having sex three times a day, should have been the first clue that your calculations were off unless…

Oh.

Oh dear.

Craig, honey, sweetie, I know the internet is full of many strange and wonderful things, but everything on it isn’t real. Those “real life sluts, horny and waiting for you” are just actresses paid by companies to film basic scenes for people to use as fantasy to masturbate to. They aren’t real. Real young women aren’t like them.

I know, honey, it is disappointing. Now, when you get a little older, we’ll break the truth to you about Santa Claus and market forces.

At a dollar a condom if she shops at CVS pharmacy’s website, that $3,000 would buy her 3,000 condoms – or, 1,000 a year.

And everyone knows that the cheapest possible condoms, made with only the finest attention to detail that only second-hand rubber pushed through a rushed automation process in the third world can bring, are a girl’s best defense against unwanted pregnancies.

Not to mention that relying entirely on the good nature of her male partner for every penetrative sex session and only him for contraceptive needs, wouldn’t at all induce paranoia into sex sessions and be hard to handle if he decided to start bitching about how “wearing the condom makes him feel less” or “c’mon baby, i wanna feel you”.

And thankfully, everyone knows that there is no such thing as rape and thus a woman has no need for any protection against unplanned and unwanted penetrations. Especially since morning after-pills are so cheap and readily available to all college aged women. Especially since our culture is so sex-positive and never shames a woman who tries and take control of her own contraceptive or who seeks out immediate medical aid post-sex. Why said women are never publicly shamed as sluts by obsessed women-hating prudes who can only get a stiffie if women everywhere fear to ever have a sex life not personally approved by said dickwads.

And let’s not also forget that said condoms are so wonderfully reliable and best used as a single-line of defense, with no backup in case of failures. Why, things never end up leaking, breaking, or otherwise failing during sex. That certainly didn’t happen to my best friend, forcing me to send him a couple of hundred dollars so his partner could afford an abortion that wouldn’t at all have been needed if she could have been able to afford to keep taking her birth control pills reliably and they weren’t forced to use the cheapest possible condoms from CVS.

Luckily we don’t live in the horrifying, frightening world it would be if any of that was true. Damn, I bet in that world, the pill would run someone like $1,000 dollars a year or something else ludicrous like that!

(By the way, why does CVS.com list the weight of its condom products in terms of pounds?)

Gosh, why would an online store list the weight of its products? Thanks to the advent of teleportation technology, weight has ceased to matter in the calculation of shipping costs incurred what with CVS.com being an online store and whatnot.

So yeah, my guess would have to be that they are either an archaic throwback to the time when online retailers had to use trucks and delivery personnel to deliver their goods. Either that, or the far more likely option that they are simply trying to make it easier for their clientele to more easily be able to calculate how many gallons of sperm they down when they drink the contents of their used condoms like the cum-hungry sluts they are. This also makes it easy to report how much this translates into drained life force of conservative men everywhere for payment by Soros Bucks and the Grand Liberal Conspiracy to allow college-aged women to have a sexuality beyond what is dictated by 1000 year old male pedophiles.

Assuming it’s not a leap year, that’s 1,000 divided by 365 – or having sex 2.74 times a day, every day, for three straight years. And, I thought Georgetown was a Catholic university where women might be prone to shun casual, unmarried sex.

Well, maybe then, the Catholic Church should work more on actually getting their own fucking followers to follow their precepts rather than trying to use their positions as employers and taxpayers to try and strong-arm everyone everywhere into having sex in the same misery-inducing slow-suicide way as “good” Catholics.

Besides, maybe, these female law students could cut back on some other expenses to make room for more birth control in their budgets, instead of making us pick up the tab. With classes and studying and all that sex, who’s got time for cable?

And, let’s not forget about these deadbeat boyfriends (or random hook-ups?) who are having sex 2.74 times a day. If Fluke’s going to ask the government to force anyone to foot the bill for her friends’ birth control, shouldn’t it be these guys?

Just like there is no sex without penis, there is no contraception without the condom. The condom is the beginning and end of contraception, just like the penis is the beginning and end of sex.

And while it’s true that you and your rent boy can do just fine relying on condoms and shared costs, it gets a bit trickier for the heterosexual market.

But enough of this crazy person, let’s go back to the crazy person with tits… no, the one who also has a vagina, not just man-tits… there we go:

Returning to Tina Korbe, Hot Air

— and discovered that these co-eds, assuming they’re using the cheapest possible contraception, must be having sex about three times a day every day to incur that kind of expense. What Fluke is arguing, then, is that her fellow law students have a right to consequence-free sex whenever, wherever.

I know! Right? That dirty slut thinks that people should be able to have sex, that is a natural biological urge in humans, whenever they want with whoever they want consensually. And they should be able to do so at a rate of their choosing, rather than at a rate the pedophiles and sex offenders in charge of a local religion they don’t belong to think they should. And that they should be able to do that without being punished as the dirty evil sluts they are! Even those nasty evil ones who think that being part of a so-called “long-term monogamous relationship” or so-called “marriage” protects them from being sluts. We’re on to you, cockmongers! If you didn’t want to be punished for giving in to your sin urges, you should have just become dykes instead of heterosexuals engaging in penetrative sex, as God intended!

Wait, part of that, doesn’t quite sound right.

Why, exactly, especially if it costs other people something?

Seriously, I’m giving it about a week before wingnuts start arguing that salaries are illegal theft by entitled so-called “workers” from their glorious and beneficial employers.

When I can’t pay for something, I do without it. Fortunately, in the case of contraception, women can make lifestyle choices that render it unnecessary.

Yeah!

I’m not getting any, so you’re not allowed to get any either. People should just do without sex if they can’t afford it (or decide fuck it and just cut out the PIV entirely and up cunnilingus, anal, fingering, etc… instead). Sex is only a privilege for our Galtian overlords who will select those of us allowed to engage in it according to their whims, no one elses.

And let’s also forget those women who kinda, sorta, need The Pill to sort of counteract legitimate medical problems.

But really that is just a distraction from the fact that these people are literally arguing that people shouldn’t be allowed to get laid, anywhere, unless they are as well. That because they are going through a dry spell caused by their horrible personality and complete hostility to potential romantic partners, the rest of us must also remain at home flicking the little man in the boat and feeling miserable.

You know, we make fun of emo teenagers for universalizing their personal ennui with regards to relationships, but I don’t think even they at their worst argue that no one anywhere should be allowed to fuck unless Suzy takes them to the dance.

At one point, Fluke mentions a friend who felt “embarrassed and powerless” when she learned her insurance didn’t cover contraception. Can you imagine how proud and empowered that same friend would be if she learned she has the ability to resist her own sexual urges?

Yeah! Once she has mastered repression of her self even when she was in a long-term monogamous relationship or marriage (and we all know that men love nothing more than being told that they will never get to have sex again), she will be as healthy as the repressed heads of the Catholic Ch-

Ooh, ah, well, as sexually healthy as proud moral stalwarts like Ted Ha-

Er, how about as healthy as our good friend posting here at Hot Air, who is living such a free and happy life without sex she is… writing a whiny ranting post on how everyone should do without sex until she can find a boyfriend not turned off by her horns and complete hatred for anyone who dares have sex without her personal approval.

Also, yeah, I think you might be at least 50 years late to the fight on the grounds of “no one is allowed to have sex anymore”. I mean you got away with preaching “the fags can just live in the closet for the rest of their lives” because you know, middle America needed help clamping down their latent bisexuality and denying themselves, but now…?

I mean, sure, America does hate it some women something fierce, but Dude Nation also kinda wants to get laid as well and not have to worry if that’s going to be a roller-coaster ride of terror, counting, and continual arguments. And the fact that you are arguing that every single woman who puts out for a man is a slut who should be barred from sex is starting to clue in even the dimmest Jersey Shore member that the conservatives seem to be cutting off all non-self-serve options for getting their balls drained.

No, you’re sure you want to jump off that cliff? Okay, fine, I’ll just notify your next of kin.

Some little part of Fluke must recognize that it’s not … because she sought to bolster her argument with an example of an illness in which contraception might be a medically necessary treatment. Another friend of hers, she said, has polycystic ovarian syndrome, for which contraception is a common treatment. Some insurance programs that don’t cover contraception normally would nevertheless cover it as a treatment for PCOS — but other insurance programs wouldn’t. Fluke makes it sound like contraception is the only treatment for PCOS. In fact, it isn’t — and contraception is prescribed as a treatment only when the woman also wants to contracept. Fluke says her friend is a lesbian — and so wouldn’t need contraception. Why didn’t she opt for any of the other treatments, then?

Cause they don’t work as well, because they are more expensive, because they have side-effect lists that make one’s balls volunteer for gender reassignment surgery?

Also the fact that insurance companies like to play “maybe, maybe not” with various treatments including ones as common and simple as contraception coverage for PCOS is a strong argument for a truly universal health care system.

Hey, which party was it that was arguing strongly against that, calling it socialism and what not?

Ms. Fluke, I resent that you think women are incapable of controlling themselves, of sacrificing temporary pleasure for the sake of long-term success. You make us sound like animals, slaves to our instincts and able to be used, but we’re better than that. We’re persons, equal to men in dignity and love.

Yes, equal to men, so they are allowed their condoms.

Why they get to have them cheap and plentiful at the drug store so you can hide them under a pack of smokes or packet of chips when you are buying them from the bored and under-paid clerk. While you get to never have sex again. Well, certainly no penetrative sex… ever. Cause you know, you don’t stop needing contraception when you get married. Sure, you can do other stuff, like suck his dick while you make him a sandwich, so that at least his needs are still being met, and you get to engage in the exciting night time ritual of fending off his advances and coming up with ever more byzantine methods to prevent him from “sneaking in in the middle of the night”, which should keep your tiny lady brain to busy to even think about your base sexual needs.

I mean, you really should have thought of this before you chose to be straight. I mean, the dykes are having hella large amounts of sex. Like so-loud you can hear it through the walls sex. But you can listen from afar as you enjoy your Republican-demanded sexless marriage.

I mean, sure, you could just do other sex acts, or just decide to say fuck you to arbitrary sexual restrictions and fight tooth and nail against our anti-sex jihad.

But that would make Baby Jesus cry and maybe if you Catholic Bitches cared more about that, we wouldn’t have had to punish the rest of you as well.

BONUS SHORTER:

Shorter Charles C.W. Cooke, National Review:
My Contraceptive Haul

  • My ability as a wealthy man living in a metropolitan, liberal city to easily acquire free male contraception from LGBT and Women’s Health Centers, means those lying sluts must be lying about how expensive/difficult it is to acquire female contraception. Please do not let the fact that we are trying to actively eliminate these services at all diminish our argument.

Oh you think I’m kidding?

And the more tech savvy — or, perhaps, desperately mobile — can download the free “NYC Condom” app to their Windows, iPhone, BlackBerry, or Android smartphones and have its GPS service direct them to the nearest provider of free contraception with devastating accuracy. Never has a society been so precisely and easily led to safe sex.

Always Trust the Shorter****.


‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. Using nearly 4000 words and three sources to rant about a nearly week-old topic is invented by me. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™

*Seriously? Co-ed? Is there anyone alive who still calls women who attend college co-eds? Well, for someone who apparently still thinks the presence of women on college is somehow note-worthy, I’m sure the notion they have sex was enough to break their brains. But, good sir, surely women are kept in small, uncomfortable, and cloyingly perfumed boxes from the time of their unfortunate conception to breeding age, where they are sent to our officers at the Stepford Men’s Center? NO!?! Oh how society’s standards have fallen!

**It is staggeringly amazing how wingnuts have managed to claim personal credit for every monetary transaction everywhere, including taxes, salaries, and now even basic compensation packages given to students and employees as incentives for working for Company A instead of additional money. And they do this despite trying their damndest to give as little as possible to anyone who isn’t their own damn selves. I’m sure it’s only a matter of time before they start claiming you can’t use the money you made selling drugs to buy condoms, because they were responsible for that too. To be fair, at that point, they might actually have their first real point.

***If this title was any more packed with wingnuttery, I’d have to have it put down before it gave any of the other right-wing post titles rabies.

**** For those of you who say Cerberus, you sonuvabitch erotic firestarter, you never post any shorters for us to trust, may I just say, MUA HA HA HA HA HA!

203 Comments »

  1. John Revolta said,

    March 4, 2012 at 1:10

    Frist!!

  2. John Revolta said,

    March 4, 2012 at 1:14

    Also, yeah, WTF “co-eds”?
    Don’t forget “bra-burners”.

    Not to mention those confounded suffragettes. Harrumph.

  3. Andrew Breitbart said,

    March 4, 2012 at 1:18

    I’m still dead and getting deader by the minute.

  4. gocart mozart said,

    March 4, 2012 at 1:24

    I think that Mr. Brietbart is now coordinating G.O.P. election strategy from the Gates of Hell. If you have a better explanation, I’d like to hear it.

  5. Ronald Reagan said,

    March 4, 2012 at 1:29

    You think you’re dead, kid?

  6. Bozo the Cocksucker said,

    March 4, 2012 at 1:31

    Fuck you.

  7. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    March 4, 2012 at 1:39

    Neil and Jack and me, absent lovers, absent lovers.
    .

  8. wiley said,

    March 4, 2012 at 1:41

    Having watched the entire hearing held by my fellow Democrats; I was especially impressed with the rep from D.C. who pointed out that for most of human history, women died considerably younger than men due to pregnancy and complications of pregnancy. There’s an old saying that, “For every pregnancy a tooth.” because if a woman’s diet does not include enough calcium for her and the baby, that woman’s body will rob her bones and teeth for calcium for the baby. The same is true for all other nutrients.

    What if the topic were prenatal care? Would they argue that the woman should just let her pregnancy drain her body and kill her, if that’s what it takes to deliver a baby, no matter how healthy or unhealthy that baby might be?

    They appear to want us dead.

  9. wiley said,

    March 4, 2012 at 1:43

    When I say “baby” I’m referring to the later stages of a desired pregnancy. Once you decide to keep a baby and love it you relate to it as your “baby” and dedicate yourself to making and keeping it healthy and feel its presence deeply.

  10. Pupienus Maximus said,

    March 4, 2012 at 1:47

    Psychos. They’re all psychotic. I can find no other explanation.

  11. gocart mozart said,

    March 4, 2012 at 1:55

    “What if the topic were prenatal care?”

    I’ll be damned if Imagonna pay for some egotistical bitch who wants to reproduce just to get attention (and sometimes better parking spots) or because its the “in thing” among her peer group.

  12. Snorghagen said,

    March 4, 2012 at 1:55

    When I can’t pay for something, I do without it.

    When Tina Korbe can’t pay for sex, she does without it.

  13. animus said,

    March 4, 2012 at 1:57

    I’d ask how a $1 condom helps with irregular periods, but I’m afraid that someone would tell me.

  14. RWW said,

    March 4, 2012 at 2:06

    Since my employer-provided healthcare plan covers contraception as well as pre/post pregnancy and neonatal care I’m going to my employer on Monday and demand that the female workers at my office stop being paid to have sex with my goddamned money. When I’m fired for being a raving lunatic, I expect to sign up for wingnut welfare.

  15. Xecky Gilchrist said,

    March 4, 2012 at 2:07

    Someone cleverer than I said it best. “Republicans: governing like they’ve already repealed the 19th Amendment.”

  16. Xecky Gilchrist said,

    March 4, 2012 at 2:08

    Oh, and I like that the title is an Emperor’s New Groove line. Disney is kind of underrepresented on Teh Sadly.

  17. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    March 4, 2012 at 2:08

    I’d ask how a $1 condom helps with irregular periods, but I’m afraid that someone would tell me.

    I forget who said that, but every time that comes up, a winger gasbag gets their wings… and I agree.

    Fuck what the need is.

    Who fucking freaked the fuck OUT about “… government getting between you and your doctor”?! Well, what the fucking fuck is this? Same with ultrasounds, trans-vaginal or otherwise. FUCK THESE FUCKING FUCKS.
    .

  18. Xecky Gilchrist said,

    March 4, 2012 at 2:08

    I forget who said that, but every time that comes up, a winger gasbag gets their wings… and I agree.

    Amanda Marcotte, and I agree too.

  19. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    March 4, 2012 at 2:10

    … and you know who they DIDN’T invite to discuss this so-called “religious freedom” bullshit?

    Insurance carriers.

    Obviously, they would rather pay for the pill than the OB/GYN costs associated with pregnancy, no matter its outcome. Holy shit, Market Warriors… let these poor, put-upon insurers speak!
    .

  20. wiley said,

    March 4, 2012 at 2:12

    “The Emperor’s New Groove” is, indeed brilliant. Clouds and I have many occasions to say, “I’m a llama again!”

  21. Cerberus said,

    March 4, 2012 at 2:20

    “Then I put that box into another box and mail it to myself. And when it arrives, I smash it with a hammer! Or to save on postage…”

    Emperor’s New What Now?

    No, never heard of it.

  22. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

    March 4, 2012 at 2:23

    Where’s the condominium joke, damnit!
    ~

  23. wiley said,

    March 4, 2012 at 2:25

    Yesssssss. “Isthma’s secret lab” with the llama quotes is perfect.

  24. DrDick said,

    March 4, 2012 at 2:26

    I look forward to watching the Goober give head first over that cliff. It will also be amusing to watch the consternation when none of the wingnut males is ever able to get laid again.

  25. tigris said,

    March 4, 2012 at 2:26

    It comes from the health care insurance premiums you and I pay.

    And which, you know, SHE PAYS, which is the entire fucking point. The same is true of insulin, chemotherapy, every fucking treatment anyone gets paid for via insurance.

    So, they can earn enough money in just one summer to pay for three full years of sex.

    As long as they don’t eat, pay rent, etc. Of course not eating for three months would obviate the need for birth control, meaning even more money saved!

    In fact, it isn’t — and contraception is prescribed as a treatment only when the woman also wants to contracept.

    Thank you, Doctor Moron. Obviously this all just proves Obamacare leads to rationing health care and mindless pencil-pushers making decisions best left to real doctors, just like they warned us!

  26. Whale Chowder said,

    March 4, 2012 at 2:30

    If we’re gonna get after the slutty slut sluts for getting it on on our dime then we need to go after the dudes who loves ‘em a big ol’ piece of meat* to go with their cheddar-bacon slathered potato. Because bypass surgery ain’t cheap, motherfuckers, and I don’t want to pay for your lifestyle choices.

    * YOU know what I mean.

  27. zebbidie said,

    March 4, 2012 at 2:48

    If you get a woman pregnant, she gets 50% of your income for life. No exceptions, no backsies. If you try to sneak out of it, mandatory confinement to work camps where the value of your labour is used to support the little mite you fathered. And to help with locating Dad, compulsory DNA registration of all males at birth, routine DNA sampling by police at any time. Oh yeah, and drug-testing for all potential male parents, so that you don’t screw up said DNA before contributing it.

    Because how dare you have sex without suffering consequences.

  28. gocart mozart said,

    March 4, 2012 at 2:51

    I posted this at the CNS news site:
    “PregnancyI’ll be damned if Imagonna pay for some egotistical bitch who wants to reproduce just to get attention or just because its the “in thing” to do among her peer group.”

    Mangos are free for the picking and no moderation.

  29. wiley said,

    March 4, 2012 at 2:57

    The same is true of insulin, chemotherapy, every fucking treatment anyone gets paid for via insurance.

    I find myself wanting these people to get cancer and am concluding that these feelings are as much a part of defending my mental health as telling mental health professionals that when they pretend to know me better than I know myself that it only just goes to show how full they are of shit and themselves.

    In the abstract, I can feel sorry for them. In fact, though, they have made themselves mine/our enemies and I see no need to gloss over or minimize their hostility toward us at all—- that would be colluding in their attempts to diminish me/us. As much as women are told that it is our duty to understand/excuse/accept patriarchal rule, we must resist it MORE in order to just break even.

  30. Major Kong said,

    March 4, 2012 at 3:07

    Both of my (step) daughters have to use birth-control for medical reasons.

    Oh there is an evil part of me that wishes one of these self-righteous bastards would call them a “slut” or a “whore” because I would have an excuse to teach them a whole new level of pain.

  31. N__B said,

    March 4, 2012 at 3:08

    Gosh, why would an online store list the weight of its products? Thanks to the advent of teleportation technology, weight has ceased to matter in the calculation of shipping costs incurred what with CVS.com being an online store and whatnot.

    Actually, Cerb, it seems to me that if teleportation were invented, it would require energy at least roughly proportional to the mass of the object teleported.

    Great post as long as I overlook your laughable error about nonexistent technology.

  32. Major Kong said,

    March 4, 2012 at 3:09

    If teleportation were invented I’d be out of a job. So I hope they hold off for at least a few more years.

  33. N__B said,

    March 4, 2012 at 3:13

    Can’t make an omelet without breaking some fetuses.

  34. Bitter Scribe said,

    March 4, 2012 at 3:13

    Fluke says her friend is a lesbian — and so wouldn’t need contraception. Why didn’t she opt for any of the other treatments, then?

    Umm, because being a lesbian has nothing to do with how effective a given medication is?

    I’m just surprised they didn’t do the “hold an aspirin between your knees HURRRRR” thing.

  35. vortexgods said,

    March 4, 2012 at 3:20

    It’s interesting how much conservative men love condoms.

    Maybe that’s a good thing, because if some self-hating woman decides to have sex with a conservative, she’ll have less chance of picking up some nasty disease.

    Still, I admit I’m surprised.

  36. Cerberus said,

    March 4, 2012 at 3:29

    N_B:

    Damn you science!

  37. Fenwick said,

    March 4, 2012 at 3:37

    For those of you who say Cerberus, you sonuvabitch erotic firestarter, you never post any shorters for us to trust, may I just say, MUA HA HA HA HA HA!

    Ouch.

  38. N__B said,

    March 4, 2012 at 3:48

    Cerb blinded us with science!

  39. tigris said,

    March 4, 2012 at 3:53

    erotic firestarter

    The new radical Girl Scout agenda RULES.

  40. eddie said,

    March 4, 2012 at 4:02

    ^^ wot tigris said.

  41. Major Kong said,

    March 4, 2012 at 4:34

    It’s interesting how much conservative men love condoms goats.

    Fixed for more goatsex.

  42. N__B said,

    March 4, 2012 at 4:35

    Does anyone really know
    What time it is?
    Why Rs fuck goats
    Does anyone really care?

  43. S. cerevisiae said,

    March 4, 2012 at 4:45

    They really can’t help themselves, can they? Talking about those sluts, those dirty, filthy sluts. Those dirty nasty nubile college sluts. Those…

    …continued into the land of Aqualung…

    And the wingnuts are wondering why they are losing the support of women.

  44. vacuumslayer said,

    March 4, 2012 at 4:50

    Another interesting thing to me is that in Wingnut World, the worst thing you can be is a slut. Now, I, myself am not cut out for slutdom…don’t have the time or the inclination. But I am pro-slut. Because I don’t think anybody’s sex life is even remotely my business.

  45. Major Kong said,

    March 4, 2012 at 4:55

    These people are more obsessed with sex, and especially everyone else’ sex life, than anyone I’ve ever met.

  46. tigris said,

    March 4, 2012 at 4:55

    Plus they did the math, you can’t even fuck 3x a day for that cheap with lousy store brand condoms, making the pill the cost effective solution for the true slut. Fiscally conservative, that is.

  47. pkat12 said,

    March 4, 2012 at 5:19

    No birth control, no stiffi pills. How’s a virtuous woman supposed to fend off those fortified horny creepy old bastards.

  48. Nym said,

    March 4, 2012 at 5:20

    I’m just surprised they didn’t do the “hold an aspirin between your knees HURRRRR” thing.

    Already tried and failed.

  49. tigris said,

    March 4, 2012 at 5:39

    Why aspirin? Why not saltpeter? At least as effective.

  50. Snorghagen said,

    March 4, 2012 at 6:00

    These people are more obsessed with sex, and especially everyone else’ sex life, than anyone I’ve ever met.

    I can understand why wingnuts fixate on other people’s sex lives. Otherwise, they’d have to think about their own sex lives, and there’s a limit to the amount of horror and degradation the human mind can endure.

  51. g said,

    March 4, 2012 at 6:01

    What’s the deal, do they all just read the talking points and not bother with the actual transcript?

  52. g said,

    March 4, 2012 at 6:07

    Yes, us. Where do you think the insurance companies forced to cover this cost get the money to pay for these co-eds to have sex? It comes from the health care insurance premiums you and I pay.

    Isn’t he leaving out of the “you and I” the “and THEY”? The “co-eds” are also paying for premiums, and they may not like paying for his Lipitor.

    Does he object to paying for other peoples’ blood pressure meds? Broken legs? Insulin? Anti-fungal cream for athlete’s foot?

    Doesn’t this stupid ass motherfucker know this is how insurance works?

  53. Spengler Dampniche said,

    March 4, 2012 at 6:10

    Excellent post. Halfway through it, my soul died. But well-written.

  54. McJohn said,

    March 4, 2012 at 6:21

    Rush Limbaugh has now officially expressed regret for his choice of words, but he said he was trying to be “humorous”. I wouldn’t have credited him with the originality to re-cast “Geez, cantcha girls take a joke?” in even the slightest of camouflage, but apparently I underestimated him.

  55. Cerberus said,

    March 4, 2012 at 6:25

    Spengler-

    Thanks. I know what you mean about soul dying.

    Just writing the post nearly broke me, especially when Le Douche Craig started going on about how cheap CVS condoms are.

    Yeah, they’re cheap… for a damn steep price as my best friend found out when they became his only line of defense against getting his partner pregnant thanks to them not having enough money for her to stay on The Pill.

    Luckily they had me who currently had enough money to send to them so they could have an abortion (hey wingnuts, wasn’t there a time when you still bothered to pretend that being against abortions had to do with just wanting to stop them rather than with punishing “slutdom”? You might have given up the game just a little bit as of late.).

    But yeah, when he got to that part, I just wanted to punch him in the neck and had to step away for a little bit from the keyboard before continuing.

  56. Another Kiwi said,

    March 4, 2012 at 6:49

    Transcript of Fluke at the hearing
    Without insurance coverage, contraception, as you know, can cost a woman over $3,000 during law school

  57. jim said,

    March 4, 2012 at 6:51

    No surprise that this contraception business is making wingnuts lose their shit so bad: in political terms it’s Segregation 2.0, but Teh Gospel According To Reagan brooks no opposition … & in a time of Purity Purges noone dares defend sanity in CrazyTown … so yeah, basically they’re so fucked they need a pregnancy test. So to speak.

    If you’d asked me a year or so ago, I would have guessed that the Democrats would get massacred in 2012: poor economy, GOP resurgent in the wake of 2010, a stacked deck due to redistricting – & the bulk of seats being contested in November are the Democrats’ to lose. All the GOP would’ve had to do was run someone like Rubio pimping another bogus “Compassionate Conservative” scam like 2000 & spit “It’s The Economy, Stupid” back in Democrats’ faces 24/7, & an epic win would be, well, a slam-dunk.

    The folly of Misogynist Bishops On Parade, the Creepy Old White Dudes Forum in the Senate & Rush’s folly* in attacking Sandra Fluke make that scenario ever less likely, & the Republicans’ own stupidity in going Full Anti-Sex League looks like electoral suicide. Pretty hilarious to see commenters on the right screeching that Obama is just using this sexytime biz to distract everyone from Amerika’s impending destruction … because he apparently can control both the GOP & the Catholic bishops into dancing to his tune & making themselves look like woman-hating anti-sex scumbags. As Jedis go, THAT ONE is a most powerful wielder of midichlorians indeed.

    I am pro-slut. Because I don’t think anybody’s sex life is even remotely my business.

    Sexual gratification is the Tiger tank of liberal fascism!
    RAWR.
    ______________________________________________________

    * I think his apology is a serious tactical error: every good griefer knows that any display of contrition is Troll-AIDS; if you show Troll’s Remorse, you are admitting that you are a loser – & nobody wants to be associated with a loser. The non-apology (sorry that I used poor language when I called that bitch a slut) has failed to stop the hemhorraging of Rush’s already-shrinking popularity, & it looks like the boycotting will continue no matter what that pseudo-sentient gob of human suet says at this point.

  58. Chris said,

    March 4, 2012 at 6:55

    I think his apology is a serious tactical error: every good griefer knows that any display of contrition is Troll-AIDS; if you show Troll’s Remorse, you are admitting that you are a loser – & nobody wants to be associated with a loser. The non-apology (sorry that I used poor language when I called that bitch a slut) has failed to stop the hemhorraging of Rush’s already-shrinking popularity, & it looks like the boycotting will continue no matter what that pseudo-sentient gob of human suet says at this point.

    I agree with this. The right wing base wants the kind of person who’ll spend his days walking around shoving weaker kids into lockers just to show he’s boss, not a weak self-doubter who apologizes for it. Look at who they elect.

  59. Spengler Dampniche said,

    March 4, 2012 at 7:05

    I think what still has the power to shock me — and at this point it takes millions of volts — is the idea that these people are so bigoted against women they can’t even see how it could be offensive to anyone. It’s identical to the old guard Rhodesians who insist that the Keffirs are biologically inferior. They are so absolutely certain the darks aren’t capable of functioning, the idea that they should have equal rights is preposterous.

    By the same token (you see what I do there), the modern American conservative sees woman as chattel in a way that hasn’t been prevalent since the end of the Civil War. Voting rights aside, women were understood (by all but the upper class) to be more or less human. Less, but definitely human. The 18th century idea that they were essentially brood mares is long gone.

    Except not. Incredibly, they’re back. And it’s as if they didn’t notice we went anywhere while they were gone. The fist of vengeful wrath is all greased up with nowhere to go.

  60. wiley said,

    March 4, 2012 at 7:12

    Yeah. A lot of bullies real and imagined need to be given permission and justification for their verbal bullying, and often only experience the thrill vicariously because they know they’d get their ass kicked in a fair fight.

    I have a hunch that a lot of these online bullies imagine themselves to be formidable bad-asses while imagining that liberals are all complete pacifists, and I also have a hunch that that’s why carrying guns is so important to them. On some level, most of them probably understand that they’re not Rambo and never had a stand-up fight in their life.

  61. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    March 4, 2012 at 7:14

    Yes, us. Where do you think the insurance companies forced to cover this cost get the money to pay for these co-eds to have sex? It comes from the health care insurance premiums you and I pay.

    Isn’t he leaving out of the “you and I” the “and THEY”? The “co-eds” are also paying for premiums, and they may not like paying for his Lipitor.

    Does he object to paying for other peoples’ blood pressure meds? Broken legs? Insulin? Anti-fungal cream for athlete’s foot?

    Doesn’t this stupid ass motherfucker know this is how insurance works?

    It would almost be worth it if these bozos passed a law that would remove their boner pills from insurance plans.

  62. jim said,

    March 4, 2012 at 7:21

    the kind of person who’ll spend his days walking around shoving weaker kids into lockers just to show he’s boss

    St. jim (Lulz Be Upon Him) has expressed to me his occasional concern that he is being just such an intellectual bully whenever he wields the mighty Lulznir upon some poor wingnut. His means of dealing with such self-doubts, in his own words:

    “I find that a brief meditation on the misery, poverty & death that their reindeer games inevitably spawn in real life every time they’re put into practice is a most salutary panacea for such qualms, as well as an excellent incentive to double down on the bitchslapping. Not to mention how much jolly good fun it is to bitchslap assholes.”

  63. Another Kiwi said,

    March 4, 2012 at 7:22

    the modern American conservative sees woman as chattel in a way that hasn’t been prevalent since the end of the Civil War This is the weirdest bit of it all. I guess it’s just easier for the menfolks iffen you don’t have to think about anyone else

  64. Nym said,

    March 4, 2012 at 7:23

    “I cause nausea, cramps, and occasionally-fatal cases of dysentery. But you sir, have gone too far.”

  65. Nym said,

    March 4, 2012 at 7:24

    It would almost be worth it if these bozos passed a law that would remove their boner pills from insurance plans.

    In the spirit of the new ultrasound laws, it would be better if they passed one that meant they had to get a urethral swab for STIs every time they requested or re-filled a prescription for said boner pills.

  66. Joe Max said,

    March 4, 2012 at 7:27

    I second (or third) the cool reference to “Emperor’s New Groove”, one of the funniest Disney films in years, and one of the last “drawn” animation films made by the Mouse, the way animation ought to be done!

    Any film that features Eartha Kitt doing the villian voiceover… ooo, that VOICE…

  67. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    March 4, 2012 at 7:49

    St. jim (Lulz Be Upon Him) has expressed to me his occasional concern that he is being just such an intellectual bully whenever he wields the mighty Lulznir upon some poor wingnut.

    Don’t have any qualms, St. jim is like Beowulf, diving in the fetid swamp to wield Lulznir in the very lair of the beast. Never mind the mangoes, here’s the Sex Pistols, it’s the razor-toothed eels that infest the swamp that you dive into.

  68. Substance McGravitas said,

    March 4, 2012 at 7:57

    one of the funniest Disney films in years

    I just saw The Hunchback of Notre Dame recently and it is so so grim until the last few minutes. Happy ending! I laughed.

  69. Spiny Norman said,

    March 4, 2012 at 9:35

    “Is there anyone alive who still calls women who attend college co-eds?”

    No, there is not. That term of art is used exclusively by the drooling, brain-eating, undead who walk among us even today.

  70. boconn13 said,

    March 4, 2012 at 10:36

    Ahhhh…science, sweet science. Scientists have recently discovered a new element – Moronium – atomic number zero. While most humans have minute quantities in their brains, scientists have also discovered an entire sub-species of humans in whom Moronium has completly replaced all of their brain cells.

    You would think this sub-species is worried their liberal overlords will require forced contraception, and put a stop to their breeding entirely.

  71. Cargo said,

    March 4, 2012 at 15:39

    It’s like the entire Republican party forgot that women can vote. No doubt they’d prefer to repeal that too.

  72. an un-named republican stratigest chatting up a bag of money said,

    March 4, 2012 at 16:15

    Well sir, as Mr. Limbaugh has demonstrated, nothing fires up the leftys like sex.

    Exactly how do you think a Santorum presidential run will play out?

    Just saying, sir.

  73. Chris said,

    March 4, 2012 at 17:00

    I just saw The Hunchback of Notre Dame recently and it is so so grim until the last few minutes. Happy ending! I laughed.

    Possibly my favorite. Way adult themes, don’t know if I’d have liked it as much as a kid, but as things stand, great movie.

  74. Spengler Dampniche said,

    March 4, 2012 at 17:26

    Cargo said,

    March 4, 2012 at 15:39

    It’s like the entire Republican party forgot that women can vote. No doubt they’d prefer to repeal that too.

    http://www.lvrj.com/blogs/mitchell/Time_to_repeal_the_19th_Amendment.html

    You rang?

  75. paleotectonics said,

    March 4, 2012 at 17:26

    I don’t care if the contraception is being used for sex 2.74 times a day (what’s the .74? Venus butterfly?), it’s a part of women’s health, and it’s fucking* important. I don’t want to let the window get dragged to the right by continuously saying “Contraception is for more than sex”. Yes, very true. But contraception is also for sex. (Cue dramatic chipmunk.) Sex is a part of women’s health. QEdammitD. And one of the happier aspects of women’s health – some of the shit my wife has to go through yearly, I don’t have the balls for that.** Do they have a think tank just sitting around trying to fuck with women?*** When, in the last whatever years contraception has been covered without a whimper, did this suddenly become evidence that Satan has taken over the White House****.

    God, fuck these assholes with a ca.1846 whaler’s harpoon.

    *SWIDT
    **Mammograms? Holy FSM, looks like hell in a blender!
    ***Oh, yeah. Churches. Sorry, forgot.
    ****”Scary Black man in White House?” “Yep.” “We’re gonna have to listen to a bunch of human paraquats work out their daddy issues for the next four years?” “Probably.” “Bring it on.”

  76. Francisco Franco said,

    March 4, 2012 at 18:12

    I’m still dead too.

  77. rosebuddear said,

    March 4, 2012 at 18:18

    Is it ok if I say that that big Pill in the pic completely creeps me out?

    Which I would think it is supposed to haha. Sorry Cerb.

    Even my Dad, the staunch Republican, is completely squickied out by Rush Limbaugh’s comments re Sandra Fluke. He came over here this morning and called him “that crazy bastard”. I got most of a year to work on him re not voting for any of these pricks.

    Re the entire Republican party forgetting that women can vote.l’m sure they’d like to repeal that but we still can.

    My sister met George Senior in 1980. She was working as a waitress at the Beach Club in Palm Beach Florida. He was incredibly mean and rude to her and didn’t tip haha. He turned her from basically an apolitical person into a staunch Democrat. Her comment was “well I guess he thinks waitresses can’t vote.”

    Q. E. fuckin D. Indeed

  78. Savonarola said,

    March 4, 2012 at 18:22

    Me too. Really pisses me off that I’m a Mormon now.

  79. Torquemada said,

    March 4, 2012 at 18:22

    You think you got problems? I’m ghey.

  80. rosebuddear said,

    March 4, 2012 at 18:28

    Torq – you’re ghey? Well yeah you do got problems. You got all these bastards gunning for you backed up by the full weight of the bought and paid for MSM.

    For what it’s worth, I got your back and so does every right-thinking person in America.

    Oh crap look what I just said. All two or three of us. Sorry sweetie. haha,.

  81. Elvis said,

    March 4, 2012 at 18:33

    I’m still dead. Maybe.

  82. paleotectonics said,

    March 4, 2012 at 18:39

    Savonarola, you’ve had several hundred years of being feted by cherubs and praised by Augustinians. Perhaps they thought you were getting bored and needed a change in lifestyle. And sister wives.

  83. 100000 Dead Iraqis said,

    March 4, 2012 at 18:46

    I guess that whole “life is sacred” thing didn’t apply to us.

  84. rosebuddear said,

    March 4, 2012 at 18:51

    Why don’t you just pack up and head for the hills, little little man? I just had a REAL friend of mine die, and I’m in absolutely no mood for your bullshit.

    You are the one who has no respect for the dead. Using this guy’s death to push your bullshit political agenda. So FOAD.

    Oh and BTW, nothing about Andrew Breitbart in this thread. Fuck off, troll.

  85. Major Kong said,

    March 4, 2012 at 18:59

    So, if Breitbart was such a “patriot” how come he never served in the military? I suppose he had “other priorities”.

  86. Major Kong said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:03

    I killed a bunch of ‘em in ’91. Don’t recall seeing you there, by the way.

  87. Major Kong said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:06

    I know Breitbart certainly doesn’t.

  88. Major Kong said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:08

    Patriotism isn’t about serving in the military.

    No, of course not. Everyone knows it’s about plastering a flag decal on the back window of your F-250.

  89. Pupienus Maximus said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:10

    Eeewwwww did you make a stinker Bagoas? Oh, it wasn’t you, there’s a good boy.

  90. Andrew Breitbart said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:11

    Oh Petey! There is a “Patriot” down here that wants to have a word with you.

  91. rosebuddear said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:13

    Ok, mf. Let’s get the facts straight right now.

    Al-qaeda didn’t exist in Iraq until your hero GWB put them there, as you well know.

    How many Iraqis and Iranians did Saddam kill? I don’t know, but I do know that that the Iraqi people felt pretty peaceful under Saddam, it was US that stirred all that shit up. His regime was a pretty peaceful one, where women were allowed to work, drive, etc.

    It was GWB who stirred all that up, and now it’s all upset again.

    How could you? I am grieving, gdmit. I mean really, how could you so called “patriot” pete

  92. Just sayin' said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:15

    I didn’t laugh maliciously when Senator Kennedy died, even though he was a traitor.

    Yeah, I remember when Senator Kennedy was secretly selling missiles to Iran…

    Oh wait.. that was some other politician… now what was his name again?

    Anyway, HE was the REAL traitor, not Kennedy.

  93. N__B said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:16

    Pete – In your opinion, what makes a person a patriot?

  94. Major Kong said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:16

    Wow. You know they’ve got nothing when they have to resort to gay-bashing.

  95. Patriot Pete said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:17

    Look at my poopies. I SAID “LOOK AT MY POOPIES!”

  96. rosebuddear said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:21

    fuck off really you little needle dicked troll

  97. Major Kong said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:21

    This from the people who were shouting (about the uninsured) “Let him die!” at the GOP debate.

  98. Pupienus Maximus said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:24

    Why would would I put a decal on my gay priappus? That doesn’t even make sense.

  99. Patriot Pete said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:26

    I have consideration for all poopies. Liberals don’t.

  100. Substance McGravitas said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:26

    Paste-Pot Pete.

    Do not get high on your own supply.

  101. N__B said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:30

    Do not get high on your own supply.

    Now I’m going to be humming Air Supply all day. Thank you very much, Mr. McGravitas, if that is your real name.

  102. Major Kong said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:30

    It cost Iran an estimated 1 million casualties

    In which we assisted by giving Iraq satellite intelligence and on at least one occasion stand-off jamming of Iranian air defense radars.

  103. rosebuddear said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:32

    Again. Fuck off. Go away.. You think starting a war in in Iraq was a solution to that?

    oh and uh wikipedia for your source? good luck with that.

  104. Major Kong said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:32

    Not to mention that “We killed less Iraqis than Saddam” is faint praise indeed. That’s like saying you’re a better babysitter than John Wayne Gacy.

  105. paleotectonics said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:35

    As I said earlier, another scared little man working out his daddy issues, thought he found a real dad, one who would let him hammer boards together in the garage and not touch him at night.

  106. N__B said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:35

    That’s like saying you’re a better babysitter than John Wayne Gacy.

    It beats saying you’re not…

  107. Fenwick said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:38

    In which we assisted by giving Iraq satellite intelligence and on at least one occasion stand-off jamming of Iranian air defense radars.

    Not to mention the precursor chemicals necessary to produce the chemical weapons Saddam used.

  108. bbkf said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:42

    why does the big lebowski still make me laff so hard?

  109. N__B said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:43

    why does the big lebowski still make me laff so hard?

    Because bowling is inherently funny.

  110. bbkf said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:44

    ewww…srsly? i come back to an icky troll?

  111. Fenwick said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:44

    Also not to mention the US agricultural credits which allowed Saddam to divert funding to the war. Remember who was in charge of the US mission to provide the credits, and lay the groundwork for US-Iraqi liaison?

    Donald Rumsfeld.

  112. Major Kong said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:45

    why does the big lebowski still make me laff so hard?

    Because even a bad Coen brothers movie is still pretty damn good.

  113. bbkf said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:45

    Because bowling is inherently funny.

    yes, there is that…

  114. Substance McGravitas said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:47

    Because even a bad Coen brothers movie is still pretty damn good.

    The Ladykillers.

  115. bbkf said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:48

    so, since there’s like a gazillion comments for me to wade through, can you dudes tell me if anybody has opined that apparently a large amount of people have no idea how birth control works? and that you can’t pop it like pez to avoid making a babby?

    also, i’m sure it’s been said already, but fuck you, rush limbaugh, you worthless, bloated, evil, inhuman sack of rat excrement…

  116. Major Kong said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:49

    Hey, I even liked Hudsucker Proxy. Me and maybe three other people.

  117. Fenwick said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:50

    bbfk: If I remember rightly, you and hubbfk were headed to the neurologist last Thursday. Any closer to pinning down the cause? Has the pain lessened any?

  118. bbkf said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:50

    You liberals are boring. I’m going back to the real world.

    patriot pete is obviously unaware that this is the most happening hot tub party evar…

  119. bbkf said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:55

    yes, we went back to t denny sanford’s place in sioux falls on some of the worst roads imaginable…still no answers, but the neurologists there are insisting he goes to mayo and are going to nag his insurance company until they relent…which is awesome…so, hopefully, we’ll have an answer to all this in the near future…

    actually, this visit was a bit more hopeful, neurodoc was very reassuring that it is likely benign fasiculation syndrome and not something more serious, but that we definitely have to rule the big bad ones out…and since hubbkf has some symptoms that are unique, he really wants to know what the hell is going on…

    your memory is pretty good for an old duffer, fenny…

  120. Fenwick said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:56

    I even liked Hudsucker Proxy. Me and maybe three other people.

    I’m one of them.

  121. Pupienus Maximus said,

    March 4, 2012 at 19:56

    Hey, I even liked Hudsucker Proxy. Me and maybe three four other people.

    Fiksed for solidarity.

  122. N__B said,

    March 4, 2012 at 20:00

    Hey, I even liked Hudsucker Proxy.

    A fucking masterpiece.

    Me and maybe three other people.

    Me, Mrs__B, Ma__ and Pa__B…

  123. N__B said,

    March 4, 2012 at 20:01

    Also note that Patriots-Lose-To-Giants Pete couldn’t manage to answer a rather simple question from me.

  124. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

    March 4, 2012 at 20:03

    Hey, I even liked Hudsucker Proxy. Me and maybe three other people.

    I’m one of those. Love that flick.
    .

  125. Fenwick said,

    March 4, 2012 at 20:06

    your memory is pretty good for an old duffer

    Thanks. And yet I can feel it in definate decline, like my eyesight. Growing older sux.

    In my prime, my memory was razor-sharp. I used to exercise it vigorously. In the service, I memorized GSFG units and garrison locs down to regiment. By stuffing it into memory, I didn’t have to go to any Order of Battle references.

    I find this a consoling way to look at declining memory. It’s now like a sieve: The small stuff slips through … but the big stuff–the really important things in life–still remain.

  126. Jennifer said,

    March 4, 2012 at 20:09

    Haven’t read all the comments, so hopefully I’m not repeating what anyone else has said:

    They truly don’t understand how the pill works. Rush thinks it’s like Viagara – you only take it when you want to have sex. Like when Rush is hanging out with rentboys in the Dominican Republic.

    But more to the point, they’re fucking liars. They aren’t paying for anyone’s birth control. Taxpayers aren’t funding Sandra Fluke’s medical insurance, or that of her classmates. They’re paying for it. And the university they attend has decreed that even though the students are the ones paying for it, the university is going to dictate what care they can or cannot have with the insurance that the students are paying for.

    The same holds true for ANYONE getting health insurance through an employer. There are very few companies that pick up the whole tab anymore, and even then, they aren’t picking up the tab – the employees are. The employer is paying the employees a lower wage, and throwing in the insurance as part of the compensation package. “Compensation” means “I’m paying you this in return for your labor/services/etc.” So it’s not “the employer’s money” – it’s the employee’s. Employers are incentivized to provide part of employee compensation in the form of insurance – because they don’t have to pay payroll taxes on it. But only 4 short years ago, the Republicans were pretty clear on the fact that the insurance belongs to the employee as a part of their compensation for their work – that’s why Gramps McCain’s joke of a health reform “plan” included TAXING EMPLOYEES ON THE VALUE of the employer “provided” health insurance they receive.

    But now, suddenly, it’s all “oh, employers are GIVING this insurance to the employees, and it’s the employers’ money, and they should get to decide what it pays for.” No. FUCK NO. It’s not the employer’s fucking money. And I have old paystubs I could show to prove it, since I never once worked for anyone who paid all the premiums – it’s right there on the paystub, the amount that’s been withheld from your wages to pay for your “employer-provided” health plan. I could show other paystubs from other places, where I opted out of their shit health care coverage, and as a result, my take-home pay was higher. So tell me how the fuck it is that it’s not ME paying for my own fucking health care?

    And why the fuck is our entire media and political class too fucking stupid to point out this fact which renders the entire goddamned circus moot?

  127. tigris said,

    March 4, 2012 at 20:11

    I should have known that liberals would spew hatred when a great American voice is silenced by death.

    You point to two comments and that lets you tar one entire side of the political spectrum?

    I didn’t laugh maliciously when Senator Kennedy died

    lots of folks on your side were far more malicious than anything I’ve seen here, and far less honest, so do we judge you by them like you judge every one by the two mild comments that have so outraged you?

    even though he was a traitor.

    and there it is. You can’t even just rest on your indignantly self-claimed laurels, you have to do it the same sentence where you personally slander the dead guy whose treatment you were using to prop up your claim. Lovingly slandering him, I suppose, instead of hatefully pointing out the truth like LIBERALS when they say that Breitbart was no more honest or honorable than you are.

  128. tigris said,

    March 4, 2012 at 20:12

    Hey, I even liked Hudsucker Proxy. Me and maybe three other people.

    BROTHER!

  129. N__B said,

    March 4, 2012 at 20:15

    But now, suddenly, it’s all “oh, employers are GIVING this insurance to the employees, and it’s the employers’ money, and they should get to decide what it pays for.” No. FUCK NO. It’s not the employer’s fucking money.

    You’re right on the issues, but: the company I half-run pays for 100% of the health insurance premiums, and our salaries are almost exactly mean for the positions. My partner and I like to have some small piece of evidence that we’re running a better place to work than our competitors.

  130. Substance McGravitas said,

    March 4, 2012 at 20:15

    I still haven’t seen The Hudsucker Proxy but I know a bunch of people that like it, so I don’t think of it as having a bad rep… The Ladykillers, on the other hand, was terrible.

  131. N__B said,

    March 4, 2012 at 20:16

    The Ladykillers, on the other hand, was terrible.

    Pro: It made Tom Hanks look bad.

    Con: Everything else.

  132. Whale Chowder said,

    March 4, 2012 at 20:19

    Wow, I thought fer sure P00Ptriot Pete was a parody trool at first but his use of Whiskeypedia, complete with [citation needed] has convinced me he was for realz. LOL!

    In other news, the WA cock-uses were yesterday. I am greatly amused by the fact that they were apparently infested by obnoxiously vocal Paulbots but Rmoney got the votes. Paul couldn’t get over 25%.

  133. bbkf said,

    March 4, 2012 at 20:20

    Your mockery of Mr. Beitbart’s death sickens and disgusts me and dishonors America. A patriot’s voice is silenced and you laugh.

    oh, crap…now i’m going to have to go back and sift through teh comments, aren’t i?

  134. Jennifer said,

    March 4, 2012 at 20:21

    N_B – that’s great that your company does that, but…all it means is that you compensate your employees better than your competitors. It still comes down to whatever you are offering the employee as compensation for their work, it becomes THEIRS.

  135. Major Kong said,

    March 4, 2012 at 20:25

    your memory is pretty good for an old duffer

    I wish mine was that good.

    I can remember some cartoon I watched in 1967, but then I’ll be standing in the pantry scratching my head and wondering what I went in there to get 5 minutes ago.

  136. N__B said,

    March 4, 2012 at 20:26

    it becomes THEIRS.

    Absolutely. I know and want to know nothing about the insurance after the bill is paid. Except mine.

    Also, the ACA clause that eliminates pre-existing conditions doesn’t kick in for another 21 months, and at least four of the eight people in the office have pre-existing conditions. So we’re stuck with our current carrier until 1/1/14.

  137. Substance McGravitas said,

    March 4, 2012 at 20:29

    J. Neo Marvin pointed me to a respectful treatment of Breitbart’s death.

  138. Eric Whitney said,

    March 4, 2012 at 20:31

    Just stumbled across this blog. IT IS FABULOUS!
    I’ll be following it–very enlightening and entertaining.

  139. Jennifer said,

    March 4, 2012 at 20:31

    I should have known that liberals would spew hatred when a great American voice is silenced by death. You have no respect for common human decency or for the grief and suffering of Mr. Breitbart’s family and his many, many friends. I didn’t laugh maliciously when Senator Kennedy died, even though he was a traitor. A human life was gone and ALL human life is SACRED!

    Liberals have no respect for the dead. They have no respect for anything at all. Your mockery of Mr. Beitbart’s death sickens and disgusts me and dishonors America. A patriot’s voice is silenced and you laugh.

    I haven’t weighed in this here, “Pete,” because there’s been plenty of other places more populated by wingnuts where I can point out that Breitbart was a piece of human shit. Also, I’ve been trying to pace myself, because Breitbart is going to be dead for the rest of my life, and I’m going to get to enjoy that fact every single day for as long as I live. I couldn’t give two shits about the grief of Breitbart’s friends, because they chose to call a serial liar and horrible person their friend. I also have no sympathy for Breitbart’s wife, because she knew she was married to a douchebag, and was fine with that fact as long as it provided her with a cushy life. As for his children, though I’m sure they must be missing their father right now, they have been freed from being raised by a rageoholic with no scruples and in the long run will probably be much better off due to his absence from their lives.

    If Breitbart didn’t want people to call him what he was after he died, he should have tried to be a decent person. He didn’t. He was a destructive, rude, boorish man who would and did do anything to draw attention to himself and make a buck. And you bought into it.

    Wherever Breitbart is now, I’m sure he’s looking up at us…and laughing about how easily all the people like you who he was able to fool in life are so easily led by the nose from the other side of the grave. It’s one thing to be punked by someone who’s living. It’s completely another, much more pathetic thing, to be punked by someone who’s dead.

    There’s your eulogy, punk. Your great patriot is laughing at you from the grave.

  140. bbkf said,

    March 4, 2012 at 20:33

    Also, the ACA clause that eliminates pre-existing conditions doesn’t kick in for another 21 months, and at least four of the eight people in the office have pre-existing conditions. So we’re stuck with our current carrier until 1/1/14.

    hubbkf says that the teevee station (who pays 100% of his premiums) will be moving to a different plan that will cover treatment at the mayo…this will take effect after june first of this year, so we’re thinking if he can’t go now, we’ll just have to wait five months…but we’re going ahead with the appeals process based on principle, plus five months is a long fucking time to wait when there is concern that one could possibly have a life-threatening illness…

    BUT, i’m afraid that if we wait until after june 1, they will claim PRE-EXISTING…SORRY!!!

  141. rosebuddear said,

    March 4, 2012 at 20:48

    thank you Jennifer, for putting that piece of crap down. I knew somebody was going to come in here and do it magnificently, thought it might be you and now that’s been confirmed for me.

    I can still only take online or human interaction even, in small doses. Damn, I didn’t ever think grieving was going to be this long or hard. I have no experience with this, up to now, and hope to not again soon.

    Love you guys.

  142. bbkf said,

    March 4, 2012 at 20:50

    for petey:

    Early this morning, news broke that Sen. Ted Kennedy had passed away after serving in the U.S. Senate for nearly 50 years. Soon after, conservative commentator Andrew Breitbart began a sustained assault on Kennedy’s memory, tweeting “Rest in Chappaquiddick.”

    Over the course of the next three hours, Breitbart unapologetically attacked Kennedy, calling him a “villain,” “a big ass motherf@#$er,” a “duplicitous bastard” and a “prick.” “I’ll shut my mouth for Carter. That’s just politics. Kennedy was a special pile of human excrement,” wrote Breitbart in one tweet.

    linky for more…

  143. bbkf said,

    March 4, 2012 at 20:54

    I can still only take online or human interaction even, in small doses. Damn, I didn’t ever think grieving was going to be this long or hard. I have no experience with this, up to now, and hope to not again soon.

    hang in there, bud…one day you’ll wake up to find that the days and nights are no longer endless and that your life will resume some kind of normalcy…the best advice i got when my little brother died was, ‘the next month or so is going to be a fog…don’t make any decisions, don’t expect to be yourself (or any of your loved ones either), just get by however you can…give yourself the time…’

    for some reason it helped…hope it helps you too…

  144. gocart mozart said,

    March 4, 2012 at 20:59

    I lurv the Hudsucker Proxy

  145. gocart mozart said,

    March 4, 2012 at 21:02

    You too can convert a dead mormon to the gayocracy
    http://alldeadmormonsarenowgay.com/

  146. Andrew Breitbart said,

    March 4, 2012 at 21:17

    I miss you most of all Dennis, especially the way you would lick my balls you sexy devil.

  147. Nym said,

    March 4, 2012 at 21:20

    The Ladykillers.

    Was still pretty entertaining, though it will not hold up for half-a-century like the original.

  148. Pennis said,

    March 4, 2012 at 21:21

    I only want there to be a law requiring you sluts to film yourselves having sex because I believe in small government and personal liberty.

  149. gocart mozart said,

    March 4, 2012 at 21:28

    http://news.yahoo.com/ron-paul-no-federal-financial-aid-tornado-victims-102533838.html
    I’m confused. Don’t I also pay for all other people’s insurance coverage out of my own pocket or were the Limbough defenders just completely full of shit on that point also.

  150. Whale Chowder said,

    March 4, 2012 at 21:31

    Alt shorter Pennis: I have no idea what “equivalent” means.

  151. tigris said,

    March 4, 2012 at 21:45

    Also, the ACA clause that eliminates pre-existing conditions doesn’t kick in for another 21 months, and at least four of the eight people in the office have pre-existing conditions.

    Under HIPAA I don’t think you’d have to wait the whole 21 months, just until everyone’s had continuous coverage for whatever the exclusionary period is, which I believe is 12 months.

  152. bbkf said,

    March 4, 2012 at 21:47

    Alt shorter Pennis: I have no idea what “equivalent” means.

    well, ya know…sometimes logic is hard! but yeah…on the one hand we have bloated, hateful, awful piece of dung which had no qualms whatsoever about defaming people for a living, but then felt victimized and such whenever it was criticized…

    and on the other hand, we have jennifer who straight up says, blartblart was a piece of shit and i’m glad he’s dead and she’ll stand by those words instead of calling the wah!mbulance…that equals blartblart’s heinous and cowardly behavior…how?

  153. rosebuddear said,

    March 4, 2012 at 21:48

    hmmm thanks bbkf. I had another post to you but it got ate when the site went down for a few minutes.

    Fog – exactly. I’m just groping thru it. My boss says I’m very “professional” on the phone and he congratulates me. Ha. I wish. I’m just doing it by rote at this point.

  154. Major Kong said,

    March 4, 2012 at 21:51

    He was a destructive, rude, boorish man who would and did do anything to draw attention to himself and make a buck.

    Well yes, but in right-wing-bizarro-world that’s called “He told the truth about libs” or some such.

  155. bbkf said,

    March 4, 2012 at 21:53

    hmmm thanks bbkf. I had another post to you but it got ate when the site went down for a few minutes.

    Fog – exactly. I’m just groping thru it. My boss says I’m very “professional” on the phone and he congratulates me. Ha. I wish. I’m just doing it by rote at this point.

    just reading what you are going through makes my stomach hurt and makes me remember going through the loss of my brother and my dad…and sincerely hoping to never have to go through anything remotely like it again…and feeling awful whenever anybody goes through it…i’m glad you’ve got sadly to make you smile a bit though…there’s just something about this collected group of yahoos that is awesome…

  156. bbkf said,

    March 4, 2012 at 21:55

    feh…i have to appear on pbs this evening and i do. not. want. i had planned on spending the day on the couch mindlessly catching up with sadly and wearing ‘loungewear’ the entire time…damn…

    but, on the upside, since they’re are airing ‘pizza with father dom’ or somesuch, i believe i rallied the troops and our demand for pizza instead of regular pledge drive food will be met!!!

  157. rosebuddear said,

    March 4, 2012 at 21:56

    thank you honey. And I don’t sincerely want to put you through that all over again.

    the sadlies are the best, aren’t they?

    love

  158. bbkf said,

    March 4, 2012 at 21:58

    ahhhh…i find myself reliving it a lot anyhoo…but i find a steady diet of sadlyno and lifetime movies helps a lot…

  159. bbkf said,

    March 4, 2012 at 21:58

    lisa rinna is truly a horrible actress…

  160. Whale Chowder said,

    March 4, 2012 at 22:04

    Rosebuddear, I am sorry for your loss and wish you the best. The boyfriend of a dear friend of mine committed suicide when we were in college. It messed her up for a long time.

    Have patience with yourself, feel what you feel, but most of all don’t be shy about getting help and counseling to get through this. And know that it will get better.

  161. Jennifer said,

    March 4, 2012 at 22:11

    I couldn’t become what I hated most in Andrew Breitbart, because I’m not a liar and I would never, ever in a million years slander or smear a private person I’ve never even met to the public at large in pursuit of a political goal like he did to not only Shirley Sherrod, but also the majority of people who worked for ACORN and also to my friend Abraham Carpenter, no matter how much money might be in it for me. Those people all had/have families too, and Breitbart didn’t give a shit about damaging them, so I can’t see why anyone should give a shit now about telling the truth about Andrew Breitbart and who he was.

  162. Jennifer said,

    March 4, 2012 at 22:12

    bbkf – she’s being robo-controlled by a parasite that lives in her lips.

  163. Jennifer said,

    March 4, 2012 at 22:18

    Also, too, rosebuddear – hang in there. Whale Chowder is right – it does get better, in its own time. You just have to get through until that time comes around. Not easy I know, but it does help to know it won’t be this way for ever – that’s the whole purpose of the fog, so that once you get through it, you won’t be able to remember most of it. And that’s a real blessing.

  164. Golem Heart said,

    March 4, 2012 at 22:20

    “For over 20 years, I have illustrated the absurd with absurdity, three hours a day, five days a week. In this instance, I chose the wrong words in my analogy of the situation. I did not mean a personal attack on Ms. Fluke.”–Limbaugh

    This weak of an ass-covering should be expected of amateurs, not the best mouth on the team. Analogy? Rush’s audience does not tune in for analogies, announced or implied.

    He voices the collective id of American movement conservatives — that’s not an insult, it’s a tame rephrasing of what they say, in part, about him. They would not understand their “uncoordinated instinctual trends” (Wikipedia) as bad or in need of management. Quite the opposite.

    This is obviously a role than cannot be reconciled with satire, or with “illustrating the absurd with absurdity,” whatever Rush means by it. When your self-defensive reframing resembles a parody of the discourse of those you profess to despise, there’s a problem. Plain talk, unvarnished truth-telling, giving voice to the outrage of a silent and simple-good minority: these are not done with “anologies” so oblique that their existence and formulaic structure is not apparent at first hearing. Or “humor” so rarefied that its funniness is hypothetical, apparent only to a select few. Or non-attacks that have the structure and content of attacks. Wouldn’t these ploys be games for wankers who imagine they’re more clever than they are? Who would their audience be?

    Is it really possible, Rush, to tamp down untimely sleazy sex talk by stoking the fires of it from the highest bully-pulpit of conservatism? That’d require telegraphed use of rhetorical ploys, if any at all …

  165. Andrew Breitbart said,

    March 4, 2012 at 22:22

    Today I was “Lucky Pierre” with Saddam and Bin Laden.

    Tomorrow we are scheduled for the “Human Centipede”.

  166. vacuumslayer said,

    March 4, 2012 at 22:25

    Feed him.

  167. Jennifer said,

    March 4, 2012 at 22:33

    Tomorrow we are scheduled for the “Human Centipede”.

    Feed him.

    WIN.

  168. Golem Heart said,

    March 4, 2012 at 22:36

    When the human centipede is made of skeletons, all nourishment just kinda trickles down thru the ribcage, like that one skeleton in the Pirates of the Carribean drinkin red wine.

    Hardly what the good mad doctor had in mind.

  169. Person with a guilty conscience said,

    March 4, 2012 at 22:40

    I thought fer sure P00Ptriot Pete was a parody trool

    He was.

    rosebuddear: I feel like a total shit for inadvertently causing you pain. Hence my guilty conscience and this confession. I only wanted to try my hand at parody trolling as a difficult challenge. I hope you can find it your heart to forgive me.

  170. rosebuddear said,

    March 4, 2012 at 22:40

    Jennifer, Whale Chowder, et. al., thank you so much. Family and friends have been less than supportive, for some reason I don’t understand. I mean gee, it’s been a whole three weeks, and I should have sucked it up and moved on by now?

    This place has been helping me more than anybody.

    Oh and Andrew Breitbart? Jennifer was spot on. If you hate everybody, nobody will cry for you when you’re gone. Except for paid shills, of course.

  171. Major Kong said,

    March 4, 2012 at 22:43

    I only wanted to try my hand at parody trolling as a difficult challenge.

    It was a pretty darn good parody troll. Pretty much had me convinced.

  172. bbkf said,

    March 4, 2012 at 22:44

    It was a pretty darn good parody troll. Pretty much had me convinced.

    pretty much had me repulsed…

  173. rosebuddear said,

    March 4, 2012 at 22:44

    omg so Patriot Pete was a parody troll? Well Pete, if person with a guilty conscience is you, apology accepted.

    Parody trolling is fun, I know. The fact that you ran up against a person who is really hurting is not your fault.

    But don’t do it again, k? Promise me.

  174. Fenwick said,

    March 4, 2012 at 22:51

    Eric W.: We have fun in Sadlyville! I got hooked exactly the same way: Stumbled across it one day. I lurked for a while, then jumped in and I’ve been having fun ever since. Plus I learn all sorts of fascinating things when the thread goes off-topic. The people are patient and welcoming of new voices.

  175. bbkf said,

    March 4, 2012 at 22:53

    hey major, whilst we were in soo foo on thursday, we did not go to ‘carnaval’ because they do not open until four p.m. and since the roads were majorly shitty, we didn’t want to hang around too long and have to drive home in the dark…so we went to red lobster instead…even though i hate seafood and fish, i will go there for the garlic cheese biscuits…so, maybe next time…oooh! i believe i will be heading there with a buncha girlz to go see my nephew do his sit-down act in the final comedy competition in may…heh…those poor guachos will not know what hit them!

  176. Cerberus said,

    March 4, 2012 at 22:55

    All right, IP Proxy Dennis is gone and “Patriot Pete” is hopefully gone, certainly his messages on this post are gone.

    Since the whole “eulogy for the dead” circles around the toilet constantly, I’ll throw in some of my thoughts.

    A eulogy, and all other manner of respect for the dead is supposed to be a totaling of their lives, a celebration and acceptance of what someone was. The good in them and the good they did, the bad in them and the wrong they caused, the neutral in them, and the small things that helped define them. Certainly there is always respect given to direct family and close friends as they will each grieve in their own way and perhaps with them you’ll politely hold your tongue as they mourn “the greatest man they ever loved” and not mention his drinking problem to them.

    But that only extends so far. We would not expect a daughter who had been abused by her father to stand up and pretend he was a flawless figure when accounting his life. Similarly, public figures became something more as well, because more know of them than family and friends and so there are 2 eulogies, the one by family and friends and the public one where there is a total accounting of their lives, again, the good and the bad, and the small things that define or how that person impacted each person’s life for good or bad.

    And the Republicans have weaponized that, especially the natural inclination among those with empathy to stay their tongue on the bad, so as to show respect to close family and friends.

    Republicans take that deference and use it to hard-sell their recent dead as flawless angels of God, ask everyone to speak only good of the dead, and often demand simply unreasonable periods of “moratorium” on criticism against the figure even among those directly negatively impacted by them.

    It is the equivalent of a grandmother not just asking that the daughter abused by her father not speak ill of him at the funeral but for the rest of her life, and not just in the family making it a grim and hate-filled experience, but in all aspects of her life. That her writing a poetry book to work through said experiences was “dishonoring the memory”.

    And that would be one thing if Republicans and conservatives were consistent. If they demanded that every dead figure be white-washed (which is problematic and in the realm of rewriting history to begin with), but whenever it is some liberal figure, who actually did good in their life, actually did fight to help people and make their lives improve over the unending fight of the right-wing, there is nothing but hate. It is nothing but a hagiography of the human failings, or that which seemed bad to Republicans and again, the liberals are not allowed to speak to give a full account, buried under the avalanche of right-wing vitriol.

    Because how dare the liberals take this “family funeral” and try and “politicize” it to the public arena and thus disrespect the family and friends who are grieving. And again, liberals being creatures of empathy show deference.

    And what this means is that after every public figure’s death, the Right’s heroes are given white-washed histories so those who weren’t alive during the nightmare will generically think positive of them, while the Left’s heroes are left “controversial” and “obscure” and unworthy of a second-look at their actual actions and successes.

    And what’s even worse, is what happens next, the greatest insult to someone’s life. That is, the rewriting of histories to fit conservative narratives. Not only are right-wing heroes erased of humanity, given only positive accomplishments, their real world effects made more and more vague to protect the idea of “positivity” so that someone’s real life is erased for a Baby’s First History Book feel. But the Left’s heroes once their battles in life have been largely seen as a good thing, are reanimated and abused as gross insults to themselves, being called forth on behalf of conservatives who fought them tooth and nail in life and called them evil traitors in death, to argue how said well-regarded public figure who spoke out against conservatism would totally have supported current right-wing obsession X.

    So yeah, when any conservative anywhere starts pointing to private blog commentators venting the way X public figure impacted their life to the negative as proof that “liberals don’t respect the dead”, it is one more vicious obvious proof in the truism: IT’S ALWAYS PROJECTION.

    And part of the standard right-wing tactic of bullying the refs and abusing liberals’ senses of fair play and empathy in order to get undue deference to their various sociopathic desires.

    Sorry for the long comment.

  177. bbkf said,

    March 4, 2012 at 22:56

    bbkf – she’s being robo-controlled by a parasite that lives in her lips.

    ha! it must be catching because elizabeth berkely has the same lips and lack of skilz!!!

    bob, i love lifetime…and yes, i do know that i’m pathetic…

  178. bbkf said,

    March 4, 2012 at 23:01

    cerbs…have you watched the film ‘festen’?

  179. rosebuddear said,

    March 4, 2012 at 23:02

    cerb – s’ok. find some more of this stuff for us, would you?

    I really need a few more laffs.

    Agree with everything you just said.

  180. Cerberus said,

    March 4, 2012 at 23:06

    And it’s even worse when the reason said person is dead is because some right-winger shot them for being liberal.

    So after Dr. Tiller’s death, we got this endless dance of “it wasn’t us, but it’s great that he’s rotting in hell, and hey, you liberals aren’t allowed to use his death to talk about right-wing violence, the reproductive rights he spent his life fighting for, or actually talking about what its really like to be an ‘abortion doctor’ (cause it ruins our narrative that they are inhuman demons and thus make it easier to have them killed by our loonies.”

    And yet when someone who’s spent his life literally as a real-life troll doing nothing but trying to make other people’s lives worse due to the paranoid delusions brought on by their massive drug problems checks out because of the abuse they’ve heaped on their lives, we are expected to say nothing about the figure who wanted to see us all die and was willing to release the doctored video “evidence” to help ensure it.

    In short, fuck their abuse of the system. A fair hagiography of his life demands we talk about the bad and public as well as the shallowly supposed “good” he did in private, maybe, because people don’t want to speak ill of the dead.

    Sometimes a sonuvabitch dies. The fairest thing we can do is make an honest accounting of his impact, let it all be recorded and let their life stand on its actual merits, not what we think will trick some deity into letting them in the “good place”.

  181. Cerberus said,

    March 4, 2012 at 23:06

    bbkf-

    I have not. What’s it about?

  182. Golem Heart said,

    March 4, 2012 at 23:07

    Well-put and thought, Cerberus.

    Not that the point needs arguing, but Dennis’s calling you a charity case (presumably for your role at this blog) is wildly off the mark. You’re a fine fit at Sadly, No!, and everything is going swimmingly by standards that matter here. I hope you continue to practice Shorters, but they can function as headers to the verbosity you tend to generate, and I tend to read for fun (even if I don’t often comment on what you write).

  183. bbkf said,

    March 4, 2012 at 23:09

    it’s a danish film about a family gathering for the patriarch’s 60th birthday…all does not go as planned: wiki link

    your comments just made me think of it…for some reason, it’s a film i watch every time it’s on teh teevee…

  184. Cerberus said,

    March 4, 2012 at 23:10

    rosebuddear-

    Ok. I’ll try and put something up tonight.

  185. bbkf said,

    March 4, 2012 at 23:12

    Not that the point needs arguing, but Dennis’s calling you a charity case (presumably for your role at this blog) is wildly off the mark.

    i took it as an even deeper and widespread judgement and really wished it was possible to literally track someone down through their internet connection and physically punch them repeatedly in the face…

  186. bbkf said,

    March 4, 2012 at 23:14

    and, now i am going to be very highbrow and take a long bubble bath whilst perusing my copy of ‘the world of downton abbey’ and possibly my latest issue of vanity fair before i go and be all pbs-y…god, the tedious life of a local media star….

  187. Major Kong said,

    March 4, 2012 at 23:15

    hey major, whilst we were in soo foo on thursday, we did not go to ‘carnaval’ because they do not open until four p.m.

    There’s another place I like there called “Mama’s Ladas” that makes great enchiladas. In fact, that’s all that they make, but they’re really good.

    http://mamasladas.com/

  188. gaijinlaw said,

    March 4, 2012 at 23:17

    “women might be prone”

    Can’t tell if lame pun
    *squint*
    or Freudian slip.

  189. Fenwick said,

    March 4, 2012 at 23:17

    Like Whale, I sorta suspected Fake Pete was fake. I thought the faux ‘respect’ of using ‘Senator’ clashed too much with ‘traitor’ in the very same sentence. Plus taking the time to key ‘Senator’ and ‘Mr.’ seemed suspicious. He/she sustained it very well, imo, so major props for that sir or madam. Fake trolling is hard to pull off. I’ve failed several times.

  190. rosebuddear said,

    March 4, 2012 at 23:17

    thanks cerb – I could use a few laffs you know. and you do make me laff and it helps me.

    love

  191. Suezboo said,

    March 5, 2012 at 0:33

    I didn’t see the comment that Cerb – our own Cerb! – was a charity case.
    Good Grief – it was thanks to the pleading by certain commenters right here that she was promoted to be a contributor.
    And we were/are damn pleased with how that worked out. She has been a real find for the blog which that poor wee Belgian lad was trying to manage all by himself.
    OK, she can “go on a bit” but that’s her style and I, for one, am grateful we have her.

  192. Golem Heart said,

    March 5, 2012 at 0:57

    Suezboo, it was (at one time) the last comment in the last thread, and I’m afraid I made too much of it, but it bugged me.

  193. Bitter Scribe said,

    March 5, 2012 at 1:06

    I think we can all agree that calling a woman a slut and a prostitute is just knee-slappingly hilarious.

    I hope Rush tries that to the humor target’s face next time. Preferably when she is accompanied by a large, muscular husband, boyfriend, father or brother.

  194. Smut Clyde said,

    March 5, 2012 at 1:09

    Ah, the chivalric values of the South and its ‘honor culture’…

    Preferably when she is accompanied by a large, muscular husband, boyfriend, father or brother can of Mace or length of rebar.

  195. bbkf said,

    March 5, 2012 at 1:20

    There’s another place I like there called “Mama’s Ladas” that makes great enchiladas. In fact, that’s all that they make, but they’re really good.

    hmmmm…will give this place a go…

  196. Gerald Fnord said,

    March 5, 2012 at 1:45

    > And the more tech savvy — or, perhaps, desperately
    > mobile — can download the free “NYC Condom” app

    Now if some Dumbocrat suggested that people across the country should be just fine because they can get an application for the smartphone “anyone” can afford and which works only in New York City…well, that would be élitist flyoverism, but this is different because.

  197. exford legs said,

    March 5, 2012 at 1:48

    in the days before bloated West Hollywood trolls like Breitbart could claim macho warrior status merely by carrying someone else’s water and publishing someone else’s PR packages
    THIS while it’s here, THAT when it shoots into the stratosphere of awesome.

    rosebuddear, I am thinking of you. We are thinking of you, I expect. I’m impressed when one can quell troll titans* in your disposition

    *heartless sorts

  198. rosebuddear said,

    March 5, 2012 at 1:51

    thank you sweetie.l didn’t expect that, but it’s a nice bonus.

    looking forward to Cerb’s next demolishment of right wing crap.

  199. Cerberus said,

    March 5, 2012 at 2:03

    rosebuddear-

    As requested, a new post.

    And my limitless sympathies for what you’re going through. I haven’t lost any friends that way…yet…(knock on wood furiously), but I’ve done enough Suicide Watches over a number to fear that call.

    So BIG HUG!

  200. tigris said,

    March 5, 2012 at 3:17

    I mean gee, it’s been a whole three weeks, and I should have sucked it up and moved on by now?

    OH MY GOD. Please please please do NOT let such thought-free responses bring you down, no matter how closely related to you they are and no matter how sure of themselves they are because THEY ARE WRONG. It takes as long as it takes, and it is not wrong if as long as it takes is different for different people. It doesn’t sound like you’re letting it change the way you grieve, I just wanted to support you on this because YOU ARE RIGHT.

  201. Thread Bear said,

    March 7, 2012 at 18:23

    (taps mic)

    Is this thing on?

  202. Sadly, No! » Taming of the Slut said,

    September 25, 2012 at 9:18

    [...] course it is. King Rushbo helped lead everyone off the cliff in the first place by trying to Michelle Malkin Sandra Fluke in service to declaring the Pill an enemy of the People. And now that the drug-addled pederast has [...]

  203. Sadly, No! » Let’s Do the Time Warp Again! said,

    August 21, 2013 at 10:00

    [...] all began with this tweet by resident National Review shithead Charles C. W. Cooke Esq. (previously highlighted on this site arguing that contraceptives for people with vaginas must be easy to acquire because he could get [...]

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