Feb
10

How Bad Are the Election Prospects for the Republicans?




Posted at 17:21 by Cerberus

So bad, they are starting their “if we lose, it’s because black voodoo doctors stole the election” shtick at least 8 months early.

Gene Schwimmer, The American Genius:
Will We Have a ‘Fair’ Election in 2012?

    • Since there is absolutely nothing different about this election compared to previous years in terms of how insane the Republican candidates are, any failure of us to win is obviously due to election theft by the ghost of ACORN*. Also, this is why Republicans have to act even more like a bad Dickensian villain.

  • ‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. Being both lazy and unoriginal because I need to be out the door in 2 minutes is invented by Cerberus. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™

    *I must admit, I’m actually kind of amused that despite having an entire media in the tank for them, an entire police force in the tank to silence dissenting voices, a giant spread of voter suppression tactics, a free check to spend infinite anonymous money on elections, and of course, all the straight up theft shenanigans they’ve pulled in every election since at least 2000, the Republican candidates are so bad and turnout for them is so low that the Republicans are still worried it won’t be enough to get rid of the black man. That’s like sending the entire US military to take out 3 guys in a cave and ending up with only 4 survivors…and 3 of them are the cavemen.

    403 Comments »

    1. Major Kong said,

      February 10, 2012 at 17:24

      They must be worried if they’re already starting to cry “election theft!”.

    2. Nylund said,

      February 10, 2012 at 17:26

      remembering how wingnuts acted when 300 came out, they really do see themselves as the small group that must put a stop to the invasion by brown people.

    3. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 17:26

      Needs moar Yakkity Sax

    4. Helmut Monotreme said,

      February 10, 2012 at 17:42

      Those blowhards want a military coup so bad they can taste it.

    5. DrDick said,

      February 10, 2012 at 17:51

      Will We Have a ‘Fair’ Election in 2012?

      Not if the Republicans can help it, as they know they will lose by a landslide.

    6. Anonymous said,

      February 10, 2012 at 17:52

      “That’s like sending the entire US military to take out 3 guys in a cave”

      Reminds me of the tale of the British army patrolling the border with Scotland. One night the boys are gathered ’round the campfire when a Scot appears on a nearby hillside and moons the Brits. The captain said, “Lieutenant, take a squad up the hill and deal with that idiot!” The Lt. and a dozen men run up and over the hill and then a loud but unseen battle takes place – much shouting and clashing of swords. A while later the Lt. comes back alone, bleeding and with clothing slashed to pieces. “Sir,” he says, falling to the ground, “It was a trap. There were two of them.”

    7. DrDick said,

      February 10, 2012 at 17:53

      They must be worried if they’re already starting to cry “election theft!”.

      I think even the conservatives (or at least some of them) have enough sentience to recognize that they are royally fucked given that all their candidates are braindead whackaloons with the widespread popular appeal of AIDS and the plague.

    8. N__B said,

      February 10, 2012 at 17:57

      Isn’t Ricky Google in favor of AIDS? It’s god’s punishment on non-lovers-of-procreation or some such…

    9. tigris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 18:01

      “Hey, some professor has a C average at guessing elections, and he says Obama might lose if the economy gets worse!”

      GENIUS!

    10. tigris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 18:05

      Anonymous, PLEASE pick a nym of some sort. I have “Anonymous” kill-filed because that name is usually used by trolls, but now I have to autopsy to make sure I’m not missing what you say. This exposed me to near fatal quantities of troll spoor in the last thread. Maybe “not that Anonymous” or something? Anything?

    11. Mat said,

      February 10, 2012 at 18:09

      OMG, I actually read the linked essay. These wingnuts are sinking into a level of crazy that we could have never imagined even a couple of years ago. When one harbors such absolute certainty about everything one believes in, and yet everything one believes in so absolutely goes horribly wrong, by not accepting this and changing, an already fragile and misguided mind simply crashes, and apparently this is exactly the mindset we’re seeing now with far too many wingnuts confirms.

      It’s funny to a certain extent, yes, but how is all this widespread wingnut craziness going to manifest itself in the future? I wonder.

    12. smedley said,

      February 10, 2012 at 18:17

      I have been thinking lately (oh noes!) that this might be the year that the Republican nominee will NOT move to the center for the general election. Neither Gingrich nor Santorum would be physically capable of such; Rmoney’s instincts and long-time advisors might tell him he must, but his reputation might prevent it. Thoughts?

    13. Steerpike said,

      February 10, 2012 at 18:21

      I got off the boat and have had to spend the last 10 minutes peeling off leeches (closing pop-up windows). It’s not worth it, Sadlies!

    14. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 18:25

      I have been thinking lately (oh noes!) that this might be the year that the Republican nominee will NOT move to the center for the general election.

      Nah. They’ll pull a McCain and select a nutjob and go all mainstream.

      Of course, they’ll risk being killed in office, if they miraculously win…

      Mitt had already started to moderate some of his campaign commentary (you’ll notice he didn’t make a whole lot of outrageous news this week) until Santorum swept the board on Tuesday. He might have to fine tune his timing, but he can still move back center in time for the general, unless it goes to the convention

    15. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 18:26

      how is all this widespread wingnut craziness going to manifest itself in the future? I wonder.

      I don’t. I worry.

      It’s called Oklahoma City.

    16. Geds said,

      February 10, 2012 at 18:32

      Those blowhards want a military coup so bad they can taste it.

      Do they want it shoved down their throats in some way? By big, muscley men with long, heavy, well-oiled guns?

    17. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      February 10, 2012 at 18:39

      Snotymous, Nonnie, another nonnie, …
      ~

    18. Mat said,

      February 10, 2012 at 18:46

      Oh, I’m sure, actor212, right now, as we speak, in the deep woods of Ohio, Missouri, Alabama, et al., there are ultra-wingnutty militias preparing for Obamageddon. Just imagine a bunch of Promise Keepers armed with cheap, knock-off M4 rifles and camouflage Bibles, their plumber’s cracks glistening with sweat and feces as they hump their online-bought military packs filled with Slim Jims, vitamin water, and Glenn Beck-approved gold coins. Of course, they’d be much better armed if not for that fucking evil, government-mandated garnishing of their paychecks at Pep Boys to pay child support. Such is war, my friends, such is war.

    19. Bozo the Cocksucker said,

      February 10, 2012 at 18:52

      They got away with stealing the election in 2000. When it became clear that they’d feel no consequences from that…that was basically the moment America became untenable.

    20. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 18:53

      Of course, they’d be much better armed if not for that fucking evil, government-mandated garnishing of their paychecks at Pep Boys to pay child support.

      My concern is less about an armed assault as a lucky shot.

    21. smedley said,

      February 10, 2012 at 18:56

      Mat, most of those yahoos think the National Guard and the US Army will join them in overthrowing the Usurper-in-Chief. Just like the tax-protester who flew his plane into the IRS building thought he was igniting a widespread protest against Federal tax system……….

    22. Major Kong said,

      February 10, 2012 at 18:58

      right now, as we speak, in the deep woods of Ohio, Missouri, Alabama, et al., there are ultra-wingnutty militias preparing for Obamageddon

      Wolverines!

    23. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 19:04

      Just like the tax-protester who flew his plane into the IRS building thought he was igniting a widespread protest against Federal tax system……….

      Who?

      Oh yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! I forgot about him!

    24. Pryme said,

      February 10, 2012 at 19:04

      remembering how wingnuts acted when 300 came out, they really do see themselves as the small group that must put a stop to the invasion by brown people.

      That attitude *really* contradicts with the whole “A majority of America is CONSERVATIVE, DAMNIT” argument they’ve been peddling since the Clinton days.

      I mean which is it: are conservatives the righteous minority fighting for the soul of the country, or the moral majority trying to keep the sinister minority from destroying America from within?

    25. Pryme said,

      February 10, 2012 at 19:07

      These wingnuts are sinking into a level of crazy that we could have never imagined even a couple of years ago.

      1st Rule: Always Trust the Shorter.

      2nd Rule: Their reality will always surpass our satire.

    26. smedley said,

      February 10, 2012 at 19:14

      “Who?

      Oh yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! I forgot about him!”

      Of course you did. Right-wing domestic terrorist somehow was disappeared. Whocouldaknown?

    27. Chris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 19:15

      Off-topic:

      I step out for one hour to buy some food, and when I come back, the CPAC hotel’s got a non-trivial number of non-fans in front of it making it clear that they don’t like them. Also crossed an OWS type rally marching down Connecticut Avenue towards the hotel.

      Going to step back out in a few minutes to observe the situation. But something tells me this CPAC’s going to be much more fun than the last two.

    28. Bitter Scribe said,

      February 10, 2012 at 19:21

      My take-away from this idiot’s article was that he was praying the economy does not improve between now and Election Day.

      Yeah, all you unemployed, underemployed and afraid-for-your-job losers. Better you should suffer than we run the risk of having the darkie in the White House another four years.

      These assholes have been throwing charges of “treason” at their political opponents for decades. If this isn’t actual treason, what is?

    29. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 19:24

      the CPAC hotel’s got a non-trivial number of non-fans in front of it making it clear that they don’t like them. Also crossed an OWS type rally marching down Connecticut Avenue towards the hotel.

      Occupy did promise a march.

      And it’s no coincidence, I think, that the hotel WiFi has been, shall we say, spotty?

    30. Pupienus Maximus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 19:27

      Okay, I read the whole thing, heh. He does go about “temporary” fixes to improve the economic numbers but, quelle surprise, never describes what such a thing might look like, how we would recognize it. It gets more difficult in that such Democratic trickery, for which the R’s must be ever vigilant and block at any cost, will somehow magically spur the economy (allegedly the real one in which, btw, Rmoney worked – did he ever mention that?) then, after Obama steals the election magically slows the economy down again! That wouldn’t be trickery, that would be magic.

      My attempt at a not-so shorter: We should do whatever is best for the country, economically even though if the economy gets better Obama will win. Extending the payroll tax holiday would improve the economy BUT IT’S ONLY A TEMPORARY MEASURE, A TRICK TO MAKE THE ECONOMY BETTER TO ELECT OBAMA AND THE ECONOMY WILL SLOW DOWN AFTERWARDS. SOMEHOW. SO WE CAN SAY WITH A STRAIGHT FACE THAT WE ARE ACTING IN THE BEST INTEREST OF THE COUNTRY. BESIDES, GETTING RID OF THE BLACKETY BLACK SOCIAMALIST MUSLIN USURPER IS THE COUNTRY’S BEST INTEREST.

    31. St. Trotsky, Pope-in-Avignon said,

      February 10, 2012 at 19:27

      I mean which is it: are conservatives the righteous minority fighting for the soul of the country, or the moral majority trying to keep the sinister minority from destroying America from within?

      You’re really expecting them to explain which of the options they’ve double-thought their way into is the one they think the world really adheres to?

    32. eataTREE said,

      February 10, 2012 at 19:29

      Pardon the digression, but I am moved to observe that with this morning’s announcement regarding contraceptive funding, President Obama appears to have made a compromise that actually made both sides happy in a political dispute.

      This must be the happiest day of his life, or at least his Presidency.

    33. Thread Bear said,

      February 10, 2012 at 19:35

      OT, but it is nice to see, rare as it may be, that not ALL Republicans are hopeless.

    34. Major Kong said,

      February 10, 2012 at 19:40

      the CPAC hotel’s got a non-trivial number of non-fans in front of it making it clear that they don’t like them. Also crossed an OWS type rally marching down Connecticut Avenue towards the hotel.

      I was hoping more for an angry mob with torches and pitchforks.

    35. Substance McGravitas said,

      February 10, 2012 at 19:40

      The Christian view is that man is made in the image of God

      God is SUCH AN ASSHOLE.

    36. Bigby said,

      February 10, 2012 at 19:50

      Mat,
      No True Sothroner would collect a paycheck from Philly Jewbois Manny Moe and Jack to fund their Obaminsurrection…NAPA or maaaaybe Western Auto….but not The Pep Boys.

      Despite that:
      I know these guys they’re three good friends of mine
      Manny Moe and Jack
      They know what I’m after
      Manny Moe and Jack
      They Know what I’m after
      They’re Manny Moe and Jack

    37. Major Kong said,

      February 10, 2012 at 19:50

      The Christian view is that man is made in the image of God, hence human life is sacred.

      Disclaimer: Life is Sacred offer not valid for gays, brown people, liberals, urbanites, “non producers”, those people, residents of countries at odds with US foreign policy, subjects of US-friendly dictators, or members of that other Abrahamic religion you know, them.

      Some restrictions apply. Your mileage may vary.

    38. N__B said,

      February 10, 2012 at 19:51

      man is made in the image of God

      So…are we avatars or gravitars?

    39. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      February 10, 2012 at 19:55

      Anonymous said,

      February 10, 2012 at 19:38 (kill)

      Shorter Hideous Anonybeast: I hate teh wimmenz and teh gayz ’cause they’re all slutty sluts and I still can’t get laid.

    40. Thread Bear said,

      February 10, 2012 at 19:57

      So…are we avatars or gravitars?

      Ave Tars!

    41. Major Kong said,

      February 10, 2012 at 19:58

      Such a waste of perfectly good bandwidth.

    42. N__B said,

      February 10, 2012 at 19:59

      Ave Atque Tarry..

    43. tigris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 19:59

      Funny that the “sacred” view of sex encompasses sheets with holes, silent and subservient women as baby factories, and clergy abuse. Also: wow, straw man much?

    44. Pupienus Maximus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 20:00

      The Christian view is that man is made in the image of God

      There’s something I’ve always wondered about. If that is the case, what does god do with his penis? What is going on up there in heaven anyway?

    45. Major Kong said,

      February 10, 2012 at 20:02

      A lot of funny cat pictures could have been sent with the bandwidth that was wasted on the cut-and-paste job.

    46. smedley said,

      February 10, 2012 at 20:08

      Rachel Carson and Paul Erlich and Margaret Mead?

      The copy that is pasted expired circa 1970.

    47. Pupienus Maximus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 20:11

      Why does god even have a penis in the first place?

      ZOMG! I just proved that god masturbates! Masturbation is not a sin, it’s a fucking sacrament!

      .
      .
      .
      .
      .
      Sorry, women, only for men. If god had meant for you to masturbate he would have given you a PENIS.

    48. N__B said,

      February 10, 2012 at 20:12

      ZOMG! I just proved that god masturbates!

      And thus the Great Salt Lake and the Dead Sea.

    49. Bitter Scribe said,

      February 10, 2012 at 20:17

      Ordinarily I hate political maneuvering, but on the face of it, the Obama gambit on Catholic institutions and contraception looks brilliant. Women still get free coverage and if the bishops and their megaphones keep objecting, they look like even bigger assholes.

    50. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      February 10, 2012 at 20:17

      There’s something I’ve always wondered about. If that is the case, what does god do with his penis? What is going on up there in heaven anyway?

      Yeah, you know the whole God/Satan “battle of good vs. evil” thing?

      It’s a SWORDFIGHT!

    51. smedley said,

      February 10, 2012 at 20:21

      Can’t find the youtube, but I think it would rival the epic Tommy Lee versus Ron Jeremy COCKFIGHT.

    52. jim said,

      February 10, 2012 at 20:26

      Eccch, what a steaming pile.
      The boat – STAY ON IT IF YOU VALUE YOUR LUNCH.

      Yet another case where the inability to leave comments is, shall we say, not exactly an ineffable enigma. Dude’s pearls must be mashed into pearl-diamonds by now with all the clutching action going on.

      What’s that? You have a mathematical model that can predict who’ll be POTUS 75% of the time? Wowsers! You only chump it one in four times! Thing is, my cutting-edge “Try Comparing Their Total Campaign Fundraising, Dipshit” model is more like 93% accurate – & it’s so easy, even a wingnut can use it! Hmm … I wonder what it says things look like for the GOP right now?

      RUH ROH.

      Yes, people are leery of donating to incompetent venal fuckheads. Quelle Surprise!

      Nugget of truth = wingnuts are indeed having sleepless nights, haunted by the grim spectre of not enough economic misery to get them shoehorned into the big white building in DC.

      Funny thing is, if not for the Daddy Complex that makes them waste so much time & energy on trying to GET OBAMA OUT with nothing but a pack of recidivistic cretins to choose from, they could probably clean up big time down-ticket — if only they didn’t keep steadfastly nominating raging loons whenever & wherever possible while purging the few relatively human-like cadres they have left that don’t make them look entirely like the frickin’ Heaven’s Gate cult.

      Y’know, if the Repubs were really so ferschlugginer het up about the election getting stolen, they could always invite a team of international observers to check it out & see if … oh yeah, I forgot: RAGING XENOPHOBIA.

    53. Substance McGravitas said,

      February 10, 2012 at 20:32

      Manny Moe and Jack.

    54. Substance McGravitas said,

      February 10, 2012 at 20:33

      If that is the case, what does god do with his penis?

      How many angels can dance on the head of it?

    55. Chris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 20:33

      I was hoping more for an angry mob with torches and pitchforks.

      Tsk, tsk. So shrill. Don’t you know teabaggers are the only ones allowed to bring deadly weapons to political rallies?

      Not much controversial happening so far. The Occupy guys met up with the protestors that were already there, so it’s quite a crowd, and it’s not being quiet. They were on the hotel grounds protesting for a while after I got there: at some point, I guess the cops or hotel security had them move, and now they’re in the street and on the sidewalk. Not an inconvenience, though, as the cops have had that street blocked off since yesterday morning.

      So, lots of protesting, but pretty much business as usual. I do appreciate the fact that someone’s finally letting CPAC know how the city feels about them. Now if only we could teach them how to use the fucking metro properly.

    56. smedley said,

      February 10, 2012 at 20:39

      I just hope there are people in the White House watching CPAC on C-Span (down by the C-shore?) taking notes on what is being said. I would love to be on a speech-writing team that uses Senator Demented’s words, that Democrats and Republicans aren’t on the same team, against them.

    57. Chris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 20:46

      Back on topic: I am also amused at all this preemptive freaking out, almost as much as I am by the way they’re reacting to their candidates. Ah well, you reap what you sow.

      remembering how wingnuts acted when 300 came out, they really do see themselves as the small group that must put a stop to the invasion by brown people.

      As I recall, that battle ended with all 300 soldiers wiped out and the Persians continuing on unhindered, so it fell to the “boy lovers and philosophers” to PWN them, which they did, with a lot more success than the Warrior Culture.

      If they want to reenact Thermopylae, by all means, I suggest we let them.

      I have been thinking lately (oh noes!) that this might be the year that the Republican nominee will NOT move to the center for the general election. Neither Gingrich nor Santorum would be physically capable of such; Rmoney’s instincts and long-time advisors might tell him he must, but his reputation might prevent it. Thoughts?

      If it’s Romney, I think you may be right. The guy has such an awful reputation among conservative voters that odds are he’ll spend all his time trying to convince the psychos to turn out and vote, rather than convincing the middle voters who’re on the fence between him and Obama.

      Best case scenario is that the right’s gone so far it’ll hold the party hostage to its ideology in such a way that the party won’t be able to win elections.

    58. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      February 10, 2012 at 20:46

      Spam says spam spam spam.
      ~

    59. jim said,

      February 10, 2012 at 20:47

      The usual suspects will commence either ROFLing or BAAAAWING respectively the songs of their venerable & much-beloved “Obama caved in AGAIN, SHEEPLE!” mutual folklore ritual in 6 … 5 … 4 … main sequence activation confirmed … 3 …

    60. jim said,

      February 10, 2012 at 20:51

      Telephone Scatalogia went right off their winning streak of awesome albums after their guitar player OD’d.

    61. Lawnguylander said,

      February 10, 2012 at 20:53

      eataTREE said, February 10, 2012 at 19:29

      Both sides are happy? Planned Parenthood is happy, most every woman on birth control and those of us who sleep with them are happy but the bishops and other wingnuts are not happy at all. What do you mean by “both sides”?

    62. Chris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 20:54

      But why should we have a fetish about the element of consent in marriage

      Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the right wing.

    63. smedley said,

      February 10, 2012 at 20:57

      “If they want to reenact Thermopylae, by all means, I suggest we let them. ”

      Hey! Maybe they are……….

    64. St. jim, Patron Saint Of Bitchslapping said,

      February 10, 2012 at 20:59

      Some might argue that a Scroll-Troll that’s too mentally moribund to say anything of its own needs to take every single word it posts, carve it into an obelisk of obsidian with its snout, subsequently to commence using that obelisk as a suppository until the sweet dawn of inspiration arrives.

      Others may differ.

    65. El Manquécito said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:05

      Since you don’t believe in objective morals Bronze age goatherder superstition, why SHOULD a woman have to consent?

      Phizzed.

    66. Chris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:08

      El Manquecito beat me to it.

      Somehow, not believing in Bronze Age goatherder superstition (hell, most of us still do anyway, going off of the voter demographics…) translates to not believing in objective morals. Whatever you say.

    67. eataTREE said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:10

      Both sides are happy?

      The Catholic Health Association who actually represents the hospitals to whom this rule will apply is happy, as are various Catholic lay groups. This makes it as close to a “both sides happy” situation as you are likely to find in politics. I don’t consider the bishops to be a party to the dispute, any more than the FDLers who are trumpeting this as further proof that Obama is the caviest caver who ever caved are. Haters, on both sides, will hate, but the reachable parties were reached.

    68. Chris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:11

      Do you believe in objective morals? How? What do you base them off of? Is there any transcendent source?

      What do you base them off of? “Somebody in the Bronze Age wrote a book that said this is how the world should be, therefore it’s objective”? Yeah, that’s about as objective as things get…

      Still waiting on why consent should, objectively, be a criteria for sex.

      That’s because you’re a sociopath, dear.

    69. Major Kong said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:15

      Just as long as it’s not that other Ancient Near East civilization amirite?

    70. Substance McGravitas said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:16

      Still waiting on why consent should, objectively

      Gosh darn it I am in a bind. Objective? Commie don’t play that.

    71. Chris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:17

      Chronological snobbery is not an argument.

      Neither is “my book says so my book says so my book says so!”

      Though it’s nice to see that you have about as much regard for Ancient Near East civilizations as the average KKK member does for Kwanza or Chinese New Year.

      Funny, the average KKK member considered himself a devout follower of that Ancient Near East Civilization (hence “Christian Knights of the Ku Klux Klan.”) Why such snobbery and disregard towards an organization that only wanted to protect the values of that Most Objective Near East Civilization?

    72. Helmut Monotreme said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:17

      Chronological snobbery is not an argument.

      You better hope it is, otherwise people will realize Christianity Buddhism Judaism Zoroastrianism and Hinduism deserve the same amount of respect as Scientology, Mormonism, UFOs, and Objectivism, which is to say none at all.

    73. Substance McGravitas said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:18

      Chronological snobbery is not an argument.

      It pretty much IS in every sphere of knowledge that makes life worth living.

    74. eataTREE said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:18

      Dear Troll: My job title is not “Remedial Philosophy Instructor”, but if you think the available options in ethical systems are “Stone Tablets from God” or “Anything Goes”, you are behind about 2500 years in your reading and need to start in with Plato, so get cracking.

    75. Major Kong said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:22

      OK you win, muslims are evil.

      So I guess this means we’ll be ending all support for Saudi Arabia, Kuwait, Qatar, Oman, UAE and Bahrain and closing all military installations in those countries (lest our brave troops be infected by evil muslimy thinking).

      Yeah, thought so.

    76. Chris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:25

      Ah, here we go again. If we don’t want to ban Muslims from building mosques or stop and strip search every one of them at an airport, then we must be Secret Muslims. If we don’t want to allow Christians the right to dictate who does and doesn’t get to get married, then we hate Christians. Never mind that no one wants Christian churches banned or Christians strip-searched at airports, or that no one wants to allow Muslims to dictate who does and doesn’t get married either.

    77. Major Kong said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:25

      Let me guess. You’re an “isolationist” who wants to bomb Iran back into the stone age, preferably starting this afternoon.

    78. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:28

      The Christian view is that man is made in the image of God, hence human life is sacred.

      God totes needs Queer Eye For The Straight Guy, stat.

    79. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:29

      Since you don’t believe in objective morals, why SHOULD a woman have to consent?

      Because, subjectively, it’s her fucking body, you rape-endorsing idiot

    80. Chris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:29

      Nice non-sequitur, Chris. Now try making an actual argument.

      Like “All liberals love Muslims and hate Christians because shut up that’s why”? Like “my book says so therefore it’s true”? That kind of actual argument? But you’re doing so well! I don’t want to poach on your territory!

    81. g said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:30

      Hey, guess what? A politician finally stood up and called out another politician for beating up on the media!

      Mitch McConnell says Obama’s picking on Fox News!

      “At a time when nearly 13 million Americans are looking for a job and can’t find one, I think the president of the United States has higher priorities than picking on Fox News!”

    82. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:31

      ” I think the president of the United States has higher priorities than picking on Fox News!”

      Um, Yertle?

      I think you got this backwards.

    83. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:32

      OF course I’d like to know why YOU consider preemptive war and bombing of civilians to be evil (of course you could never bring yourself to use the word “sinful”). After all, if the other meat robots are stopping us from getting oil, shouldn’t we just bump ‘em off so our lives can be more convenient?

      Why is oil more important than lives, rape-lover?

    84. g said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:33

      STILL waiting to hear

      Good. You’ll learn patience.

      BTW -trolling doesn’t entitle you.

    85. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:33

      Anon, do us a favor:

      Go back to your little right-wing hellhole, and bring back a troll who can actually make a sensible argument, mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmK, little girl?

    86. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:39

      Welp, that’s it for Newt….

    87. Chris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:43

      Hmm. According to the Washington Times, Romney’s speech (can’t bring myself to actually watch ‘em) was basically him trying to convince CPAC that he was conservative enough.

      I happen to be the only candidate in this race — Republican or Democrat — who has never worked a day in Washington. [...] I don’t have old scores to settle or decades of cloakroom deals that I have to defend. [...] Any politician that tries to convince you that they hated Washington so much that they just couldn’t leave, well that is the same politician that tried to sell you a Bridge to Nowhere

      He’s talking to an audience of eager young conservatives who’re trying to network their way into the corridors of Washington power so that they’ll get to stay there for the rest of their lives. An enduring irony of CPAC.

    88. Nymstradamus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:43

      Well, I’m not going to declare victory yet in 2012. Nevertheless we are talking about wingnuts, creatures who whine and whinge even when they win.

      Therefore it’s time to bring out a bottle of my favorite beverage, vintage 2008:

      http://peterjsullivan.files.wordpress.com/2008/11/gop_tears.jpg

    89. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:46

      I happen to be the only candidate in this race — Republican or Democrat — who has never worked a day in Washington.

      FTFY, Mitt

    90. Substance McGravitas said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:46

      Brendan had a classic image.

    91. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:47

      …that is the same politician that tried to sell you a Bridge to Nowhere

      Why does Rmoney hate Sarah Palin?!

    92. vacuumslayer says it IS easy out there for a pimp said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:47

      They act like dumb people who desperately want to be thought bright;

      Says the copy-paster.

      It’s always projection. 1000% of the time. I grow weary of it.

    93. vacuumslayer says it IS easy out there for a pimp said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:48

      Brendan had a classic image.

      That is probably my favorite wingnut image.

    94. Major Kong said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:50

      An isolationist who wants all the troops brought home and the “defense” budget cut to the bone. And I believe preemptive war and mass bombings to be evil and sinful aggression.

      That makes you too liberal for the GOP and most of the Democratic party for that matter.

    95. Bitter Scribe said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:51

      Oh please, please, please, can we pass the hat for Newt? He’s got to stay in. C’mon, Tintin, set up a PayPal account or something. I’m in for $10.

      You’ve got to. This is a comedy blog, after all. It’s your sacred obligation.

    96. Substance McGravitas said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:53

      Oh please, please, please, can we pass the hat for Newt? He’s got to stay in. C’mon, Tintin, set up a PayPal account or something. I’m in for $10.

      You’ve got to. This is a comedy blog, after all. It’s your sacred obligation.

      Hmm, if Newt’s out I’m betting Santorum would get his votes, and more Santorum is more funny.

    97. tigris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:54

      I happen to be the only candidate in this race — Republican or Democrat — who has never worked a day in Washington

      Not for want of trying, of course, but as a CEO just how convincing does he find “I have zero job experience!” as a resume item in applicants?

    98. Bitter Scribe said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:54

      I happen to be the only candidate in this race — Republican or Democrat — who has never worked a day in Washington

      Because you FUCKING LOST AN ELECTION!

      Honestly, how dumb do these guys think we are?

    99. vacuumslayer says it IS easy out there for a pimp said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:55

      Santorum is now on record saying men are too emotional to be in combat. He didn’t put it exactly that way but he’s so dumb he understand that’s the argument he’s making.

    100. vacuumslayer says it IS easy out there for a pimp said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:56

      Honestly, how dumb do these guys think we are?

      As dumb as their base.

    101. Steerpike said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:56

      It’s OK for Grinchie to fade away again, now that Frothy is coming from behind.* As long as there’s a credible not-Romney (or “Mittn’t”) standing by to nip at his heels, the hilarity continues.

      *”Santorum” makes anything funny. Sort of like adding “…in bed!” at the end of any fortune cookie.

    102. Gingrich Central Command said,

      February 10, 2012 at 21:58

      We need more free media! Get me John King or some other CNN stooge on the phone, STAT!

    103. Substance McGravitas said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:00

      The thing that would be lost is the visual flair of the Gingriches. They really LOOK like the horrible awful petty disgusting power-hungry people parodied everywhere since the dawn of time.

    104. Smut Clyde said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:02

      BBBB found a Redstate mango in the previous thread:
      To say that Rick Santorum can’t win because he’s too socially conservative says the core of our beliefs is unacceptable to a majority of voters. I have a hard time believing that to be true.
      The mental preparation for self-protective denial is already beginning: “If we lose, SOMEONE ELSE CHEATED”.

      It brings to mind all the rat-fuckery this time of the cycle four years ago, when people were paid to flood left-leaning blogs with comments along the lines of “It’s all hopeless, the system is so corrupt that Republicans will rig the votes and buy the election so there’s NO POINT VOTING”.
      Evidently the tactic became so ingrained that this time they’re doing it to themselves.

    105. CRA said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:03

      “Remember when we all changed the English Language, and adopted comically elliptical euphemisms to avoid giving offense to those who take offense at plain truth plainly spoken?”–Anonymous

      Yeah, that was awesome. Good times.

      I liked it so much that I STILL call ‘em African-Americans, or blacks. Hell, I even use the pronoun “she,” or when I’ve got a wild hair, “he/she.”

      It’s all in fun. Some people call me Crazy C. Some can’t take a joke.

    106. Nymstradamus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:05

      I happen to be the only candidate in this race — Republican or Democrat — who has never worked a day in Washington.

      Oh, I’m sure there are plenty of Republicans and blue dog Democrats who have never worked a day in Washington D.C.

      Unlike Willard, though, they are office holders.

    107. Smut Clyde said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:06

      “Remember when we all changed the English Language, and adopted comically elliptical euphemisms to avoid giving offense to those who take offense at plain truth plainly spoken?”–Anonymous

      I don’t remember that. I’m always happy to call a scum-sucking douchebag, a scum-sucking douchebag.

    108. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:12

      Santorum is now on record saying men are too emotional to be in combat

      Well, you know, we get these monthly infections in the ditches that make us cry when we see giraffes.

      I once saw a zebra and went into hysterics.

    109. St. Trotsky, Pope-in-Avignon said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:13

      Really burns them up that we made them have to feel socially outcast if they say “nigger”, doesn’t it. That’s not how saying “nigger” was supposed to work at all!

    110. Major Kong said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:15

      Santorum is now on record saying men are too emotional to be in combat

      Hmmmmm. Noting a distinct lack of military service in Frothy’s biography. Not sure how he became such an expert on combat.

    111. St. Trotsky, Pope-in-Avignon said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:17

      Rick spent many years masturbating to the TV series Combat! So…

    112. Smut Clyde said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:19

      I once saw a zebra and went into hysterics.
      Was it this video?

    113. vacuumslayer says it IS easy out there for a pimp said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:21

      Hmmmmm. Noting a distinct lack of military service in Frothy’s biography. Not sure how he became such an expert on combat.

      Another chickenhawk? Noooooooooo.

    114. Pupienus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:23

      TPM has video

      http://2012.talkingpointsmemo.com/2012/02/union-protestors-try-to-occupy-cpac-victoria-jackson-watches-video.php?ref=fpnewsfeed

    115. Pupienus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:24

      And it’s got Victoria Jackson!

    116. vacuumslayer said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:26

      You all are going to feel so stupid when Victoria Jackson reveals herself to be the Andy Kaufman of her generation.

    117. tigris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:27

      “Remember when we all changed the English Language, and adopted comically elliptical euphemisms to avoid giving offense to those who take offense at plain truth plainly spoken?”

      Yeah, like how being an offensive asshole is now called “plain truth plainly spoken?”

    118. vacuumslayer said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:29

      comically elliptical euphemisms

      This seems very plain-spoken and not at all like you’re trying to sound smarter than you actually are.

      *headdesk*

    119. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:29

      Was it this video?

      TRIGGER!!!!!!

    120. Substance McGravitas said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:29

      You all are going to feel so stupid when Victoria Jackson reveals herself to be the Andy Kaufman of her generation.

      She’s “communism is good, Christianity is stupid” in one convenient package.

    121. Stag Party Palin said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:30

      Anonymous at February 10, 2012 at 17:52 – that was me. I would pick a day to have a Nym Fail when the *real* Anonymous ran out of toilet paper. I hope that some of you were able to fight your way past teh Dancing Badgers to feel the heat of my coruscating wit.

    122. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:32

      You all are going to feel so stupid when Victoria Jackson reveals herself to be the Andy Kaufman of her generation.

      Y’know, you’d like to think….

      But, nooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

    123. CRA said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:32

      Santorum, attempting to explain why he disagrees with Rome on health care reform:

      “I always say if your faith is true and your reason is right, then you’ll end up in the right place,” he said. “And of course why would God create something where reason would bring you one place and your faith would bring you another if your faith is true?”

      Good question, Ricky, why would God do that? Can we agree that He does that? I would say He does, and that this question has come up before. I bet there’s lots of top-shelf Catholic stuff Rick could read, if he wasn’t so busy burgling turds.

      Seriously, there’s something surreal about how he accidentally brings up a serious question (for people of faith) in the course of clumsily hustling an audience into thinking that screwing the needy is both conservative and Christian.

    124. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:36

      Mitt Romney, pornographer

    125. Chris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:37

      So, on this whole contraception thing, as well as Rick Santorum running on his religion, let me get this straight:

      The nativists spent damn near two hundred years screaming like banshees every time an Irishman set foot on the docks of New York because every one of them was a drone for the awful Catholic Church which was going to infiltrate America and start controlling politicians. Circa 1960, they finally get over their fear of finding a Catholic under every bed, and allow Catholics into the country club. Fifty years later, the Church actually is influencing policy at the highest levels in a way that would’ve been unthinkable as late as 1960. But now it’s all okay.

      Sorry, I’m not sticking up for the Know-Nothings or calling for a new era of anti-Catholic KKKness, but the irony of it’s just fantastic.

    126. Nymstradamus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:38

      Seriously, there’s something surreal about how he accidentally brings up a serious question (for people of faith) in the course of clumsily hustling an audience into thinking that screwing the needy is both conservative and Christian.

      Occupational hazard for GOP politicians who buy into their own BS.

    127. Nymstradamus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:40

      Occupational hazard for GOP politicians who buy into their own BS.

      Upon further reflection, it’s more of a multi-partisan hazard.

    128. Substance McGravitas said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:43

      Antisemitism is the antisemitism of the Catholic church. Always has been, always will be.

    129. Nymstradamus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:43

      Chris, Anti-Catholicism is the Anti-Semitism of the Left. Always has been ,always will be.

      So the Know Nothing Party was leftist? That’s interesting.

    130. Major Kong said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:44

      You all are going to feel so stupid when Victoria Jackson reveals herself to be the Andy Kaufman of her generation.

      Fixed for greater hilarity.

    131. Steerpike said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:46

      Chris, Anti-Catholicism is the Anti-Semitism of the Left. Always has been ,always will be.

      So the Know Nothing Party was leftist? That’s interesting.

      And the Klan! Wow, all these were lefties, hoocoodanode? Better alert Jonah

    132. Smut Clyde said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:46

      Anti-Catholicism is the Anti-Semitism of the Left. Always has been ,always will be.
      I thought that Anti-Semitism was the Anti-Semitism of the Left. Did I miss a memo?

    133. Major Kong said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:47

      “Remember when we all changed the English Language, and adopted comically elliptical euphemisms to avoid giving offense to those who take offense at plain truth plainly spoken?”

      You mean like “enemy combatant”, “precision strike”, “collateral damage”, “indefinite detention”? That sort of thing?

    134. Chris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:47

      Foiled again – I was just going to say that.

      DAMN YOU, Steerpike! DAMN you!

      Also yes, according to them, the KKK were lefties. Don’t laugh. It’s an article of faith.

    135. Interrobang said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:49

      I’m not sticking up for the Know-Nothings

      Even a stopped Know-Nothing is right twice a day? I dunno, I’m perfectly willing to be anti-Catholic (in the sense that the Catholic Church as an institution needs to be launched into the sun). Something about covering up a century worth of rapists, pedophiles, child abusers, kidnappers, and torturers, while lecturing the whole world about what great Moral Arbiters™ they are out of one side of their befanged mouths, while at the same time whining to anyone who’ll listen that “you can’t pin those crimes on us, we’re the Catholic Church and not answerable to your puny human laws, how are we spoze to know the difference between ‘a sin’ and ‘a crime’ anyway, huh?” out of the other.

      Which I guess brings us back to the concept of secular morality. It’s really damn simple. We’re social animals (beings, if that makes you feel less itchy in your longjohns), and we have to live alongside and cooperatively with one another if we want to survive, so people who do things to harm/hurt other people are not only jeopardising their standing as a group member, they’re jeopardising our collective survival.

      We’ve gotten a bit beyond the sort of “hurt me and I hurt you in retaliation” thing by developing cultures and societies and laws and things, but the basic principle is the same. And if you can’t get from “don’t risk getting put on an ice floe because no one else in the tribe can stand your shit any longer” to why rape is wrong, you probably don’t think women are people, in which case, you probably do belong on an ice floe somewhere, if only for the safety of 52% of the human tribe.

    136. Smut Clyde said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:50

      comically elliptical euphemisms to avoid giving offense

      Perhaps, if we ask nicely, Anonymous will provide us with examples of these euphemisms that are indeed shortened, elliptical versions of the original epithet.

    137. Major Kong said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:51

      Unfortunately global warming has made ice floes rather scarce these days.

    138. g said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:53

      He’s talking to an audience of eager young conservatives who’re trying to network their way into the corridors of Washington power

      Yeah, you almost sense the consternation in the wings. “He’s saying the wrong lines – that was for those OTHER rubes!”

    139. Substance McGravitas said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:53

      I’m perfectly willing to be anti-Catholic (in the sense that the Catholic Church as an institution needs to be launched into the sun).

      Don’t sugar-coat it with leftist euphemisms.

    140. Pupienus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:53

      You all are going to feel so stupid when Victoria Jackson reveals herself to be the Andy Kaufman of her generation.

      Hmmmm, similar stature, annoying voice, … You may be on to something.

    141. Pupienus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:55

      You mean like “enemy combatant”, “precision strike”, “collateral damage”, “indefinite detention”? That sort of thing?

      Enhanced interrogation.

    142. Steerpike said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:56

      I can’t wait for the Catholic Bishops demand that any politician who supports capital punishment, or even tolerates it, should be excommunicated, or, if not a Catholic, branded an anti-Catholioc hater, pilloried on Fox News, boycotted, targeted for electoral defeat and literally crucified, since the Pope has determined capital punishment is murder.

      I’ll be right over here, holding my breath.

    143. Pupienus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:56

      I’m not anti-Catholic. I’m anti-Catholics.

    144. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:56

      Chris, Anti-Catholicism is the Anti-Semitism of the Left. Always has been ,always will be.

      So Jews are the liberal fascists of the…wait, what?

    145. g said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:56

      Anti-Catholicism is the Anti-Semitism of the Left.

      So you admit that the Right is Anti-Semitic?

    146. Nymstradamus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:57

      Also yes, according to them, the KKK were lefties. Don’t laugh. It’s an article of faith.

      The Army of Northern Virginia was the Petrograd Soviet of its day.

    147. Chris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 22:58

      Even a stopped Know-Nothing is right twice a day? I dunno, I’m perfectly willing to be anti-Catholic (in the sense that the Catholic Church as an institution needs to be launched into the sun).

      I’m willing to be anti-Catholic in the sense of opposing the Catholic Church’s policies, its uglier side (cough cough child cough rape cough cough cough) and in the sense of not being a huge fan of the institution itself.

      I’m not willing to be anti-Catholic in the sense that everyone who practices the religion needs to be launched into the Sun… which is what “anti-Catholic” means in the Know-Nothing/KKK context. And that’s not on account of having been raised Catholic, I’m the same way with pretty much every belief system. So nah, I’m not going to give the KNs their “stopped but right twice a day” bonus points.

    148. Chris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:01

      “Its uglier side.” Hell. I should’ve just said “its crimes.” But what the hell.

    149. Pupienus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:02

      I’m shocked, SHOCKED to find CPACers trawling CL for gay sex. Shocking.

    150. Anonymous Gary Ruppert said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:05

      The fact is all liberals are ante-religion and support a secular government control of the free market solutions witch God has unalienably given to America. When Jeb Bush takes the oath of office in 2013 you libs will wish you had never been borne.

    151. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:05

      I’m shocked, SHOCKED to find CPACers trawling CL for gay sex. Shocking.

      Well, Santorum was scheduled to be there, what did you expect?

    152. anonymous in montana said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:08

      Them badgers is down in the crawlspace again.

    153. Major Kong said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:10

      The Soviet Union and Nazi Germany were “societies with laws and things” and they were extremely immoral anyway.

      Well the Soviet Union, sure, I’ll grant you that one.

      Nazi Germany, however, had prayer in public schools so they couldn’t have been immoral by definition.

    154. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:10

      The Soviet Union and Nazi Germany were United States is a“societiesy with laws and things” and they wereis extremely immoral anyway.

      You really need an editor. Or a cliffotine.

    155. Pupienus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:11

      whole category of potential humanity

      F’ed for reality.

    156. Smut Clyde said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:12

      What if a group of people decide that [...] those outside that group must be exterminated or exploited for their benefit?

      I am not sure how adherence to the Old Testament religious ethics previously espoused by Anonymous is supposed to discourage genocide.

    157. Substance McGravitas said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:13

      Also, very funny to hear that “collective survival” of humanity is the highest good from someone who know doubt supports slaughtering a whole category of humanity because they haven’t passed through the birth canal yet.

      Yes, I am in favour of destroying all potential humans.

    158. Major Kong said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:13

      Of course, the Soviet Union used to say that we were “decadent and immoral” what with our rock-and-roll and blue jeans and such.

    159. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:14

      Also, very funny to hear that “collective survival” of humanity is the highest good from someone who know doubt supports slaughtering a whole category of humanity because they haven’t passed through the birth canal yet.

      And yet, you managed to ooze thru and re-corporeate….

    160. Major Kong said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:14

      What if a group of people decide that [...] those outside that group must be exterminated or exploited for their benefit?

      There’s a group of Cherokee over here wondering the same thing.

    161. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:15

      I am not sure how adherence to the Old Testament religious ethics previously espoused by Anonymous is supposed to discourage genocide.

      Them old timey Jews wouldn’t hurt a fly. Just ask Joshua.

    162. Xecklothayyquou Gilchrist said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:15

      someone who know doubt supports slaughtering a whole category of humanity because they haven’t passed through the birth canal yet.

      Saying the government can’t stop women from aborting = wanting babies dead. Gotcha.

    163. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:16

      Hey, Anonymous?

      I need some coffee…could you go make a run on your way out, please?

    164. The Anonymous Truth said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:17

      Somebody needs to reread Mein Kampf to understand how the proper solutions can be implemented.

    165. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:17

      BTW, why stop at the birth canal? Peter Singer, a “bioethicist” says we can bump off children up until the age of about 4, along with the mentally retarded.

      So that’s two strikes against you. You’d better run.

    166. Nymstradamus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:17

      Trolls aren’t really human, right? I mean, all I see are just pixels.

    167. Pupienus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:18

      Assrocket:

      Meanwhile, President Obama is quietly staging a comeback. Optimism about the economy is growing at the same time that the Republican Party is, in most peoples’ eyes, making a fool of itself, so it is hard to identify the main cause of Obama’s resurgence.

      It aint just a river in Egypt, baby.

      The rest of it is sweet, sweet Schadenfreude! With a healthy side of delusion. The …. um, money shot:

      1) Barack Obama may be a horrible president, but he is the biggest moneybags in the history of politics. He will raise a billion dollars, plus his SuperPac. The Republican candidate, whoever he may be, will be swamped by Democratic Party, rich liberal and labor union money. And it is worth noting that a large majority of the GOP’s activists who now take such an arrogant attitude toward the Republican contenders will contribute little or nothing to the eventual nominee. 2) The press is now falling into ranks, forming a solid phalanx that will try to re-elect their candidate, no matter how disappointed in him they may be. For the next eight or nine months we will see the most nauseating political effort ever undertaken by the “mainstream” liberal press. 3) Sadly, the fratricidal Republican Party has blown its opportunity in the primary season to educate the American people on the economic and foreign policy fiasco that the Obama administration has be

    168. g said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:18

      Donald Trump is going to save Scotland from wind farms:

      “With the reckless installation of these monsters, you will single-handedly have done more damage to Scotland than virtually any event in Scottish history.”

      He’s apparently never heard of the Highland Clearances.

    169. gocart mozart said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:19

      http://www.lawyersgunsmoneyblog.com/2012/02/to-the-list-of-items-which-are-always-excellent-ideas
      The lamest thing ever and there is nothing like a good “knicker” joke to get the old white folks excited.

    170. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:19

      “With the reckless installation of these monsters, you will single-handedly have done more damage to Scotland than virtually any event in Scottish history.”

      He’s apparently never heard of the Highland Clearances.

      Or golf. Also.

    171. Chris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:21

      Cute the shrieks of “they’re not REALLY humans!”, which is the same thing Nazi Germany said about the Jews and mentally retarded and proves my point about the bankruptcy of secular morals in 5, 4, 3, 2…

      Every sperm is sacred!

      Wait, what?

      Okay, that’s enough out of the immature part of me. The point here, really, is that we have this infallible book, that tells us that abortions are –

      Wait, what’s that? Biblical law only requires a fine for a person who induces a miscarriage, which isn’t at all what it requires for a person guilty of murder, which would lead one to think that the Bible doesn’t actually consider abortion to be murder? But… that would only be possible if the Bible didn’t consider fetuses to be fully alive, or at least didn’t consider them worthy of the same protection that fully formed human beings get! How can this be? My bishop told me…

    172. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:21

      Trolls aren’t really human, right? I mean, all I see are just pixels.

      Nothing says “whore” like a troll willing to use terms like infanticide.

    173. Major Kong said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:21

      Somebody needs to read Mit brennender Sorge.

      It really doesn’t matter if Hitler was the biggest pagan who ever paganed, millions of Catholics and Lutherans were tripping over each other to see who could line up behind him the fastest.

    174. gocart mozart said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:22

      actor212 said,
      at 17:26

      “Needs moar Yakkity Sax”

      All of Life needs more Yakkity Sax.

    175. Pupienus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:22

      God seems to be okay with retroactive abortion. For the terrible crime of making fun of a guy’sd baldness, no less.

      Second Kings:
      2:23 And he went up from thence unto Bethel: and as he was going up by the way, there came forth little children out of the city, and mocked him, and said unto him, Go up, thou bald head; go up, thou bald head.
      2:24 And he turned back, and looked on them, and cursed them in the name of the LORD. And there came forth two she bears out of the wood, and tare forty and two children of them.

    176. tigris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:23

      Witch God! Damn, I love fake Gary.

    177. Chris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:24

      Somebody needs to reread Mein Kampf to understand how the proper solutions can be implemented.

      Why on earth would I read the shitty remake when I can just read the original in the book of Samuel?

    178. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:25

      Okay, that’s enough out of the immature part of me. The point here, really, is that we have this infallible book, that tells us that abortions are –

      Actually, the Bible is pretty liberal about abortions. If the mother’s life is in danger, in fact, an abortion is required

      Give a kick! God is a Democrat!

    179. Pupienus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:25

      It really doesn’t matter if Hitler was the biggest pagan who ever paganed,

      Except he wasn’t, not at all. Unless you consider Catholics pagans.

    180. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:26

      You seem to think you’re arguing with a Protestant.

      You’re not. You’ll have to do better.

      And you seem to think we give a goddamn rat’s ass, motherfucker!

    181. Substance McGravitas said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:27

      Unless you consider Catholics pagans.

      They worship all them saints! Of COURSE they’re pagans.

    182. Pupienus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:27

      Pupienus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:22 (kill)

      Sorry,for the elision, THAT really could use some Yakkity Sax.

    183. g said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:28

      You’ll have to do better.

      What a funny guy!!

    184. gocart mozart said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:28

      “Wait, what’s that? Biblical law only requires a fine for a person who induces a miscarriage, which isn’t at all what it requires for a person guilty of murder, which would lead one to think that the Bible doesn’t actually consider abortion to be murder? But… that would only be possible if the Bible didn’t consider fetuses to be fully alive, or at least didn’t consider them worthy of the same protection that fully formed human beings get! How can this be? My bishop told me…”

      You have to get a late 20th century edition of the Bible which revises the abortion thing, puts the gay thing in large boldface type and relegates the shellfish and pork admonitions to very fine almost invisible print.

    185. vacuumslayer said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:29

      abortion mills

      I’m wondering which Frank Luntz of the anti-choice brigade came up with this one.

    186. g said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:29

      abortion mills

      Is that where you spin them into gold? Or where you weave them into calico? Or where you grind their bones to make your bread?

    187. gocart mozart said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:31

      “Now how about the millions killed in abortion mills?”

      And they say American manufacturing jobs are a thing of the past.

    188. Pupienus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:32

      I’d LOVE human sacrifice shrines! Though to be honest, killing the like of you wouldn’t be so much a sacrifice as a boon.

    189. tigris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:32

      abortion mills

      grind slowly, but they grind exceeding fine.

    190. Chris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:33

      But thanks for bravely standing up for a few thousand people killed about 3,000 years ago.

      You’re welcome. Too bad those few thousand people didn’t have an Infallible God to tell their murderers that human life was sacred, eh? Eh?

      Now how about the millions killed in abortion mills?

      But what “objective” reason would I have for standing up for them? Your own infallible God tells me it’s not that big a deal. He tells me they’re not people like you and me. His church might disagree, but they’ve been having some trouble pointing to justification for that in the words of God.

    191. vacuumslayer said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:33

      Would you prefer human sacrifice shrines?

      No. I’d prefer “abortion clinics.” If abortion is as horrible as you think it is, there’s no need for you to use florid language to describe them.

    192. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:33

      Now how about the millions killed in abortion mills?

      Hey, has the birth rate in America changed since 1970?

      What’s that? No?

      So…millions, huh? You’d think that would have *some* impact on things…unless you’re suggesting that somehow the birth rate would have, ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, doubled, without Roe v Wade?

      So much for logic. Try again, numbnuts.

    193. gocart mozart said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:33

      grind slowly, but they grind exceeding fine.

      Makes the finest fetus flour.

    194. tigris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:34

      Baby sausages: so terbel juicy.

    195. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:34

      Remember, folks: taking human life is wrong, secular morality tells us that.

      Yes it is, but in your case, I’d probably get a Presidential pardon. I’ll risk it.

    196. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:35

      grind slowly, but they grind exceeding fine.

      Makes the finest fetus flour.

      And here I’ve been making coffee….

    197. General Consolidated Amalgamated Universal Abortion Mills Inc. said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:35

      Try our new Instant Abortion! Makes its own sauce!

    198. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:36

      The birth rate has remained the same only because of immigration from Latin America

      But wait! It’s poor minorities who are having all those abortions! So how can you be right AND wrong at the same time????

      Or could it be, those babies are being born later to women who choose to have them when they can afford them?

      Which is, you know, a fact….

    199. CRA said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:37

      “With the reckless installation of these monsters, you will single-handedly have done more damage to Scotland than virtually any event in Scottish history.”

      The history of Scotland began, for all intents and purposes, when Donald Trump bought land there to build a golf course.

    200. Pupienus Maximus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:38

      I am SO sorry for the eliminationist rhetoric. I must be worse than HITLER!

    201. gocart mozart said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:40

      “The birth rate has remained the same only because of immigration from Latin America. Without it we’d die off demographically like Europe is doing.”

      Do you have something against Catholic immigrants or are you referring to something else?

    202. CRA said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:42

      “I’m wondering which Frank Luntz of the anti-choice brigade came up with this one.”

      The Abortion Mills Brothers sold over fifty million records, and so it seemed wise to leverage the fame of their household name.

    203. gocart mozart said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:43

      “Asinine and content-free as usual. Point to somewhere in the teaching of the Church that says it’s OK to take human life in any situation except Just War (which AFAIC, it’s nearly impossible to wage a just war with such destructive modern technology as we have now) or self-defense.”

      The Great Flood
      Soddom and Gomorah
      The Crucifiction

      or is God the only one allowed to be a sociopathic killer?

    204. Pupienus Maximus said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:43

      The problem is, anonytwit, is who decides when a war is “just.” Why, one could even justify a crusade that way! Or a jihad. Or gassing and torching millions of people of a certain ethnicity.

      Perhaps tsam could tell us whether a war against bigoted, stupid, hateful, homophobic, christian supremacist turds (with my apologies to turds) is just.

    205. Smut Clyde said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:44

      If abortion is as horrible as you think it is, there’s no need for you to use florid language to describe them.

      That’s a “comically elliptical euphemism to avoid giving offense to those who take offense at plain truth plainly spoken”, VS.

    206. Thread Bear said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:44

      Although it is probably impossible to come up with accurate data on this, I would love to see a graph that compares the number of deaths of unborn as a percentage of total births starting 10 years prior to Roe v Wade and going through 10 years after, I’d really like to see if there is any significant bump after 1973. I mean, God has killed so many unborn children over the ages (it’s God’s will), perhaps abortion doctors are only doing God’s will.

    207. El Manquécito said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:44

      I was chewing on “ante-religion” and missed “witch God”.

      Let’s see, before religion, that was animism and before TV that was atavism, right?

    208. Chris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:45

      Point to somewhere in the teaching of the Church

      Again! Are we talking about the teachings of the Church, or the teachings God wrote down in the Bible? Does Infallible Objective Morality come from the Church, or does it come from God? Cause last I checked, “God” has an irritating tendency to outrank “Pope.”

      except Just War (which AFAIC, it’s nearly impossible to wage a just war with such destructive modern technology as we have now)

      Well that’s an ironic statement, considering that the last “Just War” the Catholic Church proclaimed was the Spanish Civil War, in which that destructive modern technology was put to tremendously good use with the full backing of the Catholic Church.

    209. tigris said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:45

      Without it we’d die off demographically like Europe is doing

      Huh, that looks kind of like a utilitarian argument about a subjective good.

    210. gocart mozart said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:47

      “we’re so spoiled and selfish in this country we can’t even be bothered to replace ourselves.”

      Shorter anon: White people don’t have enough unprotected sex.

    211. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:47

      No, those babies are never born. They were aborted.

      So you’re condemning to death all those babies who were born later in life?

      How Christian!

    212. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:49

      “The birth rate has remained the same only because of immigration from Latin America. Without it we’d die off demographically like Europe is doing.”

      Do you have something against Catholic immigrants or are you referring to something else?

      No, his racism is showing. He’s referring to the 12 million immigrants here without documents. Which means 6 million women. Which, if you think about it, means they’re responsible for something like ten million babies every year, according to the Klan member we’re baiting.

    213. S. cerevisiae said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:49

      Address my points, libs!

    214. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:50

      I point out that secular morality will lead to justifications of murder by redefining whole categories of human beings as “not really” human by a bigger and stronger group who will then kill them when convenient.

      You mean like how slaves were kept by good Christian people in the South?

    215. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:51

      It comes from God through the teaching of the Church.

      But hang on! If God didn’t write the Bible, and the Bible is objectively moral, then man must be objectively moral, and since abortion is perfectly legal in the Bible, abortion must be divine.

    216. vacuumslayer said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:51

      The term “abortion mill” is offensive for a billion different reasons. There was nothing “mill”ish about the clinic I went to, which was staffed with solemn, caring health professionals.

    217. gocart mozart said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:52

      Millions of living human sperm (human life) is killed every day, and that’s just by actor212. What about that anon? Oh the humanity!

    218. S. cerevisiae said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:53

      Ante-religion is a sect of Hold’emism.

    219. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:53

      Anonymous? We can spot you a teleprompter, if you’d like.

    220. Substance McGravitas said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:54

      Did the pope’s penis rise again?

    221. vacuumslayer said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:55

      And the abolitionist movement, btw, was a very Christian movement. That is not to say there weren’t non-Christians involved, but its early impetus came from believers.

      Anon has made the stunning discovery that sometimes individual Christians do good things.

    222. gocart mozart said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:55

      “The Pope is Christ’s representative on Earth.”

      Jesus needs a better HR Department.

    223. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:55

      Actor212 has made the stunning discovery that individual Christians sometimes commit sins.

      Oh, but it was sanctioned by the Southern Baptists, my friend.

      Using the Bible…

    224. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:56

      Millions of living human sperm (human life) is killed every day, and that’s just by actor212

      I’m down to thousands.

      Tennis elbow.

    225. St. Trotsky, Pope-in-Avignon said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:56

      We make jokes, that’s what we do. You are a joke, that’s what you do.

    226. Bitter Scribe said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:56

      You all are going to feel so stupid when Victoria Jackson reveals herself to be the Andy Kaufman of her generation.

      She’s going to get cancer?

    227. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:57

      Of course, those same Southern Baptists…you know, the guys you’re humping?…would call you a Papist and follower of the Anti-Christ, if you listened carefully enough….

    228. gocart mozart said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:57

      “Did the pope’s penis rise again?”

      Its funny to watch the faces of the nuns in the crowd. They are almost literally drooling.

    229. N__B said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:58

      My favorite philosopher is John Stuart Abortion Mill.

    230. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:58

      Yes, it does nicely point out the dangers of “Bible Alone”.

      So we’re agreed: men are infallible, so abortion is divine.

      I’m glad we’re cleared that up for you.

    231. actor212 said,

      February 10, 2012 at 23:59

      My favorite philosopher is John Stuart Abortion Mill.

      My girlfriend gave me a big ol’ abortion pepper mill.

    232. gocart mozart said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:00

      You all are going to feel so stupid when Victoria Jackson reveals herself to be the Andy Kaufman of her generation.

      “She’s going to get cancer?”

      No, but Jim Carrey will play her in a movie.

    233. actor212 said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:01

      Hey, Anonymous?

      This is AMERICA! We don’t take our marching orders from foreign leaders. Especially ones in dresses.

    234. vacuumslayer said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:01

      No, but Jim Carrey will play her in a movie.

      It just got way too surreal up in this joint.

    235. Smut Clyde said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:02

      Millions of living human sperm (human life) is killed every day, and that’s just by actor212
      Sperm death panels.

    236. tigris said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:02

      “Did the pope’s penis rise again?”

      Three days later.

    237. Mat said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:03

      A few minutes later, these very moral, very humanistic, very compassionate Leftists have dehumanized the unborn so much in their own minds they’re making jokes about killing them. QED.

      While you are erecting all these adorable straw men, perhaps you should dress them like the pope and have them wave at you. Or you can take them back into the sacristy and, you know, go all priestly on their bungholes.

    238. actor212 said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:03

      “Did the pope’s penis rise again?”

      Three days later.

      I thought that’s when he came?

    239. vacuumslayer said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:03

      “Did the pope’s penis rise again?”

      Three days later.

      zombie penis!

    240. Nymstradamus said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:04

      This is AMERICA! We don’t take our marching orders from foreign leaders. Especially ones in dresses.

      At least not since Margaret Thatcher.

    241. vacuumslayer said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:04

      Come to think of it, the Popes are all so fucking ancient, they do kind of shamble around like zombies.

    242. The New Confederacy said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:04

      The Pope’s penis shall rise again!

    243. actor212 said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:05

      Anonymous? How do you feel about oral sex, then? Because, you know, God has rules about anything besides ejaculations into vaginas…

    244. vacuumslayer said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:05

      This is AMERICA! We don’t take our marching orders from foreign leaders. Especially ones in dresses.

      At least not since Margaret Thatcher.

      YOU DON’T KNOW IF BEBE NETANYAHU SOMETIMES LIKES TO DRESS UP AND LOOK PRETTY. Stop making assumptions!

    245. Pupienus Maximus said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:05

      “The Pope is Christ’s representative on Earth.”

      So the kiddie fucking priests were carrying out Jesus’ will? Jesus was a pedo!!!!!

    246. gocart mozart said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:05

      Hayley Abortion Mills
      Why do you think they call it “The Parent Trap”

    247. actor212 said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:06

      Come to think of it, the Popes are all so fucking ancient, they do kind of shamble around like zombies.

      Insulting zombies is not something I would do ahead of the coming zombie apocalypse.

    248. Bitter Scribe said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:06

      I’m in favor of aborting trolls up to the 45th year BUT NO FARTHER.

    249. Pupienus Maximus said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:06

      I’m working on a design for stomping on prego women’s stomachs – a treadabortionmill.

    250. actor212 said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:06

      So the kiddie fucking priests were carrying out Jesus’ will? Jesus was a pedo!!!!!

      Well, you know, “Suffer the little children to come” and all that.

    251. vacuumslayer said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:07

      Insulting zombies is not something I would do ahead of the coming zombie apocalypse.

      Fuck, I’m sending all the zombies to the Zombie Abortion Mill.

    252. tigris said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:07

      I thought that’s when he came?

      It was forty days later that he poured out.

    253. Nymstradamus said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:07

      YOU DON’T KNOW IF BEBE NETANYAHU SOMETIMES LIKES TO DRESS UP AND LOOK PRETTY. Stop making assumptions!

      I stand correct, VS.

    254. Nymstradamus said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:08

      And I stand corrected.

    255. N__B said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:08

      The Heather Abortion Mill only pulls one leg off.

    256. actor212 said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:08

      We used ta get op at 3, go work at abortion mill until 2 th’ next morning, then make more fetuses and get op an hour before we went ta bed!

      Boot keds these days!

    257. Chris said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:08

      God didn’t “write” the Bible. The Bible is not a Christian Qu’ran. In can only be interpreted through the Holy Tradition and teaching of the Church (along with, in a proper context, things like the historical-critical method etc).

      Convenient, isn’t it? A human institution gets to rethink and review the Bible, and change what does and doesn’t apply when it’s no longer convenient (e.g. Old Testament laws against shellfish no longer apply, but somehow Old Testament laws against gayness still do?) Not that Protestants don’t do this too, of course. But it’s a hell of a way to run a system of “Objective” moral values.

      Speaking of which, that slavery-abolition you’re patting Christians on the back for? Took a hell of a long time for the Church to get around to condemning it, didn’t it? Slavery was supported by canon law as late as the thirteenth century. What changed? Did Objective Moral Law rule that one standard applied to Nineteenth Century Human Beings, but not Ninth Century Human Beings?

    258. gocart mozart said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:08

      Sperm death panels.

      The Tubesock Holacaust

    259. Mat said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:08

      Come to think of it, the Popes are all so fucking ancient, they do kind of shamble around like zombies.

      When you think about it, Pope JP II was probably dead by about 1985, but the Church carried him around a la “Weekend At Bernie’s” for many, many years.

    260. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:09

      God has rules about anything besides ejaculations into vaginas…

      Silly, it’s not about those rules, it’s about Teh Super Extra Smart Guys In Funny Hats’ rules. Y’know, the Church. And we all know exactly how they feel about non-vaginal sex with little kids. Bonus: there’s no risk of icky abortions.

    261. actor212 said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:09

      Nymstradamus said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:08

      And I stand corrected.

      N__B said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:08

      The Heather Abortion Mill only pulls one leg off.

      So she REALLY stands corrected…

    262. tigris said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:10

      I’m working on a design for stomping on prego women’s stomachs – a treadabortionmill.

      Hey, get a comically elliptical and we could start a gym!

    263. actor212 said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:10

      The Tubesock Holacaust

      Only on wash day.

      Until then, they’re like sea monkeys.

    264. wiley witch--- digital thief at large... said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:13

      Anonymous reeks of Dennis.

    265. Nymstradamus said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:14

      The Tubesock Holacaust

      First they came for in the argyles.

    266. Major Kong said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:15

      God seems to be okay with retroactive abortion. For the terrible crime of making fun of a guy’sd baldness, no less.

      Relevant:

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QFlrg22GjM8

    267. N__B said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:15

      Charles Babbage invented the first programmable abortion mill.

    268. Martin Luther said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:17

      God didn’t “write” the Bible. The Bible is not a Christian Qu’ran. In can only be interpreted through the Holy Tradition and teaching of the Church (along with, in a proper context, things like the historical-critical method etc).

      Ahem!

    269. St. Trotsky, Pope-in-Avignon said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:18

      Anonymous reeks of Dennis.

      Is it weird that when a new troll arrives, I don’t so much expect it to be an old troll, but a Sadlynaut that’s just gotten bored? Which I guess in the end is the same thing, just with the further suspicion that one of you is responsible.

    270. Bitter Scribe said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:18

      Just saw Breitbart at CPAC.

      THAT. GUY. NEEDS. HELP.

    271. Major Kong said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:20

      Meanwhile there are Christian sermons against slavery from as early as the fourth century.

      Apparently the Southern Baptist Convention circa 19th century didn’t get the memo.

    272. actor212 said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:21

      Chattel slavery was all but extinct by the High Middle Ages

      BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      Yes, this is why indentured servitude, nevermind actual honest-to-god slavery, was a feature of the English empire until they outlawed it in the 1800s.

      As I said earlier, could you go find an actual troll for us to beat up on? You’re kind of easy pickings….

    273. Substance McGravitas said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:21

      I don’t so much expect it to be an old troll, but a Sadlynaut that’s just gotten bored? Which I guess in the end is the same thing, just with the further suspicion that one of you is responsible.

      It’s a pretty reasonable call. Where’s Fenwick?

    274. actor212 said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:22

      Which I guess in the end is the same thing, just with the further suspicion that one of you is responsible.

      This one’s a little too specific in his subject matter, tho. Yes, anti-family autonomy, but Catholic-specific?

    275. actor212 said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:23

      Indentured servitude is NOT chattel slavery.

      I hate repeating myself but…

      BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!

    276. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:23

      It’s a pretty reasonable call. Where’s Fenwick?

      There is no way Fenwick would claim to be an isolationist…

    277. Nymstradamus said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:23

      Indentured servitude evolved into chattel slavery pretty damn quick in the U.S.

    278. eataTREE said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:24

      Troll, no one is really interested in hearing about the superiority of the moral system of a bunch of pedophile rapists, because it prima facie is a bad moral system.

      Your religious faction has lost all moral credibility in the West, and is rapidly losing what remains of its political power and social relevance. Can’t say as I’m sorry.

    279. actor212 said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:24

      When the ship arrived, the captain would often advertise in a newspaper that indentured servants were for sale

      I bet they even were displayed naked and in chains…

    280. actor212 said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:25

      Are you suggesting that an English indentured servant in colonial Virginia was the legal and social equal of an African slave?

      You know who else justified dehumanizing people on technicalities?

    281. Chris said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:26

      Chattel slavery was all but extinct by the High Middle Ages

      And yet on the books, it was still legit. No matter how rare it might have gotten, it was legally and morally okay to reduce another human being into slavery. As it had been for a long, long time. Why is that, exactly? And if it was immoral, as you appear to believe, why didn’t God or his representatives simply say so at the outset? (They certainly wasted no time telling us what they thought of gayness).

      Good for Christianity if Christianity evolved. Good for Christians if Christians learned not to be dicks (though as you point out, there was a relapse not long thereafter). There’s still nothing “objective” about a morality that needs that freaking long to discover that it was actually wrong on an issue as critical as slavery. Which brings us back to your original point.

    282. Major Kong said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:26

      Are you suggesting that an English indentured servant in colonial Virginia was the legal and social equal of an African slave?

      I’d say the fact that there were African slaves at that time pretty much proves that Chattel Slavery still, you know, existed.

    283. actor212 said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:26

      No less an authority than the United Nations equates indentured servitude with slavery:

      The Universal Declaration of Human Rights (adopted by the United Nations General Assembly in 1948) declares in Article 4 “No one shall be held in slavery or servitude; slavery and the slave trade shall be prohibited in all their forms”[34].

    284. Helmut Monotreme said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:27

      You know who else justified dehumanizing people on technicalities?

      Pretty much every conservative ever?

    285. actor212 said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:28

      I don’t know about you, but I don’t consider the 17th Century to be the Middle Ages.

      But YOU said…

      Chattel slavery was all but extinct by the High Middle Ages

      So, um, which is it? 15th Century or 18th?

    286. Nymstradamus said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:29

      I’d say the fact that there were African slaves at that time pretty much proves that Chattel Slavery still, you know, existed.

      Portugal and Spain were slave-trading nations, correct? Did they get the message allegedly from the Vatican regarding no chattel slavery?

    287. actor212 said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:29

      There’s still nothing “objective” about a morality that needs that freaking long to discover that it was actually wrong on an issue as critical as slavery.

      Psst. Galileo. Too.

      Also.

    288. actor212 said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:32

      Considering that no other society up until that point even bothered to question the morality of slavery doesn’t mean anything to you at all?

      Really, cuz, you know, China abolished it in the 9th Century.

    289. Nymstradamus said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:32

      Portugal ignored him.

      So I guess that the Portuguese royal family was excommunicated along with the Portuguese slave traders.

    290. actor212 said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:34

      Entirely personal and political pissing match that only incidentally had to do with science.

      Errrr, when the Church apoligized to him just, you know, in 1992, the Pope specifically cited the church wrongness in HIS SCIENCE

      I thought you were Catholic?

      Yet, here you are being lectured by a Lutheran on your own church!

    291. actor212 said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:35

      Really, cuz, you know, China abolished it in the 9th Century.

      But you said no culture had seriously moral qualms about it until the High Middle Ages, yet in the 9th Century, the emperor issued a decree banning slavery.

      So you lied. Again.

    292. actor212 said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:37

      On 31 October 1992, Pope John Paul II expressed regret for how the Galileo affair was handled, and issued a declaration acknowledging the errors committed by the Catholic Church tribunal that judged the scientific positions of Galileo Galilei, as the result of a study conducted by the Pontifical Council for Culture

      Me not seeing personal enmity. Me see Pope cite errors in science.

      And yes, the church was a patron of science: any science that supported its theology.

      Again, Lutheran lectures Catholic about his Anti-Christ…I mean, his religion.

    293. eataTREE said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:37

      Spin, troll, spin. Your club of creepy old men in dresses was engaged in a long-standing conspiracy to hide sex abuse and protect the abusers, a conspiracy that went to the highest level of the organization. The entire Western world understands this and this is why one is ever going to listen to you about what is or is not moral ever again.

    294. actor212 said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:37

      Do you know what Luther thought of homosexuality and birth control?

      His personal opinion has no importance in my relationship with Jesus, which was his point, asshole.

    295. actor212 said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:38

      Luther is not my Pope, and he never claimed to be. We have what you call free will.

      Pity you can’t know that freedom.

    296. Major Kong said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:40

      Say has anyone seen the Cathars lately? I can’t seem to find them anywhere.

    297. Le Anonymous Donalde said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:40

      How dare you to suppose it is me? I only troll in Tintin posts. Belgian-French fags are my raison d’etre.

    298. Chris said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:45

      Considering that no other society up until that point even bothered to question the morality of slavery doesn’t mean anything to you at all?

      Nope. Not when you’re claiming to be receiving your morality from a perfect God. If “objectivity” is your standard, then what was wrong then was just as wrong as it is now. For hundreds and hundreds of years, the Church simply didn’t think slavery was wrong.

    299. gocart mozart said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:48

      Do you know what Luther thought of homosexuality?

      I dunno, was it thinking about something like this?
      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-rbxov7CVi8

    300. El Manquécito said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:52

      I’m surprised nobody’s pointed out that it’s a tradition that goes back as far as Victorian England. You know, The Abortion Mill on the Floss.

    301. Snorghagen said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:54

      Yes, the Pope at the time that slavery was re-instituted (beginning at the Canary Islands) told Portugal to cut it out. Portugal ignored him.

      The 15th century popes have always been famous for their high moral standards.

    302. Nymstradamus said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:56

      So no word on whether the Portuguese nobility or slave traders were excommunicated for disobeying the Pope’s warning against the “reintroduction” of chattel slavery.

      Quelle surprise.

    303. Teh Parfaits said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:56

      Well, since [the Cathars] didn’t believe in reproducing….
      That was only us, you silly plonker.

    304. Major Kong said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:57

      “Today your Holiness, twenty thousand heretics were put to the sword, regardless of rank, age, or sex.”

      Letter from Papal Legate Arnaud Amalric to Pope Innocent after the siege of Beziers.

    305. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      February 11, 2012 at 0:59

      You seem to think you’re arguing poking an idiot with a Protestant stick.

      Yes. Do go on.
      .

    306. mingo said,

      February 11, 2012 at 1:04


      “The Pope is Christ’s representative on Earth.”

      Wrong.


      Indentured servitude is NOT chattel slavery.

      I hate repeating myself but…

      BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!

      oh, C’MON actor, those iz TOATALLY different words & stuff!

    307. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      February 11, 2012 at 1:06

      With the application of time, a fetus can become a baby.

      With the application of time, food can become shit.

      Why do people eat shit?
      .

    308. mingo said,

      February 11, 2012 at 1:07

      really, the only thing that needs be said to Mr. Smirky Condescension:

      fuck off, woman-hater

    309. wiley witch said,

      February 11, 2012 at 1:09

      Hey guys! Here’s a link to a petition to extend unemployment benefits for another year

      http://usaction.org/2012/01/tell-congress-extend-unemployment-insurance-now/

    310. Major Kong said,

      February 11, 2012 at 1:11

      You know who else wasn’t excommunicated?

    311. mingo said,

      February 11, 2012 at 1:13

      the guy that raped his 9 year-old stepdaughter?

    312. Snorghagen said,

      February 11, 2012 at 1:18

      The Pope is Christ’s representative on Earth.

      More proof that the deity has a sense of humor.

    313. wiley witch said,

      February 11, 2012 at 1:20

      It is as particularly persistent as Dennis and has the habit of calling out individuals by name to make one of it’s stupid “points”. It thinks it’s intelligent and debating with REALLOGIC ™.

    314. Nymstradamus said,

      February 11, 2012 at 1:25

      It is as particularly persistent as Dennis and has the habit of calling out individuals by name to make one of it’s stupid “points”.

      It doesn’t address me by my name. Not that I want it to.

    315. The Anonymous It said,

      February 11, 2012 at 1:33

      I will not put the lotion in the basket.

    316. CRA said,

      February 11, 2012 at 1:35

      “A few minutes later, these very moral, very humanistic, very compassionate Leftists have dehumanized the unborn so much in their own minds they’re making jokes about killing them. QED.”

      Now I feel I have to set the historical record straight.

      The Abortion Mills Brothers were SURVIVORS — four proud black babies who escaped the HOLOCAUST liberals had planned for them. They crawled out of an Abortionplex FunDumpster, up and over the side, and hit the ground PRODUCIN’ sweet pop music — never once setting foot on the Democrat welfare plantation.

      No sir, the Abortion Mills Brothers wore their gruesome band name as a badge of black pride.

    317. Snorghagen said,

      February 11, 2012 at 1:43

      The number of priests who engaged in sex abuse is actually below the average for the male population.

      And so the Catholic Church, valuing them for their scarcity, labored to protect and preserve them.

      - – - – - – - – - – -

      Snark aside, I really find it fucking revolting to see someone trying to make excuses for the Church on this particular issue.

    318. The Anonymous Priest said,

      February 11, 2012 at 1:50

      Priests need lovin’ too.

    319. Substance McGravitas said,

      February 11, 2012 at 1:54

      No they don’t. It’s in the rules.

    320. Bitter Scribe said,

      February 11, 2012 at 1:57

      As for Hitler (if that’s who you’re getting at) exactly what would that have accomplished except increased persecutions of Catholics in Germany?

      Increased?

      Catholics luuuuurve them some WWII revisionism about how they were oh so persecuted. Fact is, if you kept your mouth shut, unlike, say, Pastor Niemholler or Sophie Scholl, you were OK even if you went to Mass.

    321. tigris said,

      February 11, 2012 at 2:01

      A few minutes later, these very moral, very humanistic, very compassionate Leftists have dehumanized the unborn so much in their own minds they’re making jokes about killing them. QED.

      Aw, did trolly get trolled?

    322. Snorghagen said,

      February 11, 2012 at 2:32

      these very moral, very humanistic, very compassionate Leftists

      There are moral, humanistic, compassionate Leftists around here? Who the fuck let them in the door? I thought SN was strictly reserved for sociopathic degenerate vile reprobate skull-fucking neo-Stalinist anarcho-maniac Leftists dedicated to dragging all humankind into the unspeakable horror of eternal soul-annihilating bummeration.

    323. Substance McGravitas said,

      February 11, 2012 at 2:33

      Jonah adds to the Santorum joke total.

    324. vacuumslayer said,

      February 11, 2012 at 2:34

      There are moral, humanistic, compassionate Leftists around here? Who the fuck let them in the door? I thought SN was strictly reserved for sociopathic degenerate vile reprobate skull-fucking neo-Stalinist anarcho-maniac Leftists dedicated to dragging all humankind into the unspeakable horror of eternal soul-annihilating bummeration.

      Well, THANKS. That was supposed to be secret. Now every Tom, Dick and Hitler in Left-o-Sphere will want in.

    325. vacuumslayer said,

      February 11, 2012 at 2:35

      OK, I give up.

      YAY!!!

    326. El Manquécito said,

      February 11, 2012 at 2:41

      Roger “Abortion” Miller

    327. wiley witch said,

      February 11, 2012 at 2:42

      I thought SN was strictly reserved for sociopathic degenerate vile reprobate skull-fucking neo-Stalinist anarcho-maniac Leftists dedicated to dragging all humankind into the unspeakable horror of eternal soul-annihilating bummeration.

      seven outta eight ain’t bad

    328. Smut Clyde said,

      February 11, 2012 at 2:49

      Do you make up any credits if you ate the plums that were in the ice-box? AFAF.

    329. Pupienus said,

      February 11, 2012 at 2:54

      If teh Popo is Christ’s ambassador on urth, Jesus must have been a wild and crazy guy. I’m on my phone so I can’t be bothered to supply citations but many, some of dem old time popeys wuz boy raping, booze guzzling, wife fucking, party goddamn ANIMALS!

    330. Pupienus said,

      February 11, 2012 at 2:59

      Oh – and they were indiscriminate killers. Too. And caused more than one miscarriage. Also. And just killed teh pregos when convenient. And such as.

      Why oh why did it take so many centuries for people to tumble to the fact that the Catlick Choich is a thoroughly corrupt, evil, abusive outrage?

    331. Pupienus said,

      February 11, 2012 at 3:03

      OT
      I made Siri go to work on my shopping list. She did surprisingly well. “Garlic” she couldn’t get but she surprised me with “herbes do Provence.” So close!

    332. N__B said,

      February 11, 2012 at 3:15

      There’s a topic?

    333. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

      February 11, 2012 at 3:16

      @MK

      Nice try but I’m an isolationist.

      Why doesn’t he isolate himself?

    334. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

      February 11, 2012 at 3:17

      . “Garlic” she couldn’t get but she surprised me with “herbes do Provence.” So close!

      Herbes D’OH! Provence

    335. N__B said,

      February 11, 2012 at 3:22

      Why doesn’t he isolate himself?

      That’s the sin of Onan the Libertarian.

    336. Smut Clyde said,

      February 11, 2012 at 3:29

      Who spilled his seed on ground to which he held property rights, so it was OK.

    337. CRA said,

      February 11, 2012 at 3:32

      “Roger ‘Abortion’ Miller”

      That’s a stretch but you linked to “Dang Me” and that can’t be bad:

      Well here I sit high, gettin’ ideas
      Ain’t nothing but a fool’d live like this
      Out all night and runnin’ wild
      Woman sittin’ home with a month-old child

      Dang me, dang me
      Oughta get a rope and hang me
      High from the highest tree
      Woman would you weep for me?

    338. Snorghagen said,

      February 11, 2012 at 3:58

      some of dem old time popeys wuz boy raping, booze guzzling, wife fucking, party goddamn ANIMALS!

      Alexander VI! Probably my favorite Holy Father, though he’s got some tough competition.

    339. Atheism said,

      February 11, 2012 at 4:03

      “Herb Does Provence” is some seriously classy hot gay porn.

    340. tigris said,

      February 11, 2012 at 4:06

      Wow, Atheism is kink-ay.

    341. A Journal of the Plague Year said,

      February 11, 2012 at 4:09

      I thought SN was strictly reserved for sociopathic degenerate vile reprobate skull-fucking neo-Stalinist anarcho-maniac Leftists dedicated to dragging all humankind into the unspeakable horror of eternal soul-annihilating bummeration.

      Oh dear. I drop by for the needlepoint.

    342. vacuumslayer said,

      February 11, 2012 at 4:11

      D’oh! This is what happens when you go all in for a mediocre joke.

    343. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

      February 11, 2012 at 4:11

      That’s the sin of Onan the Libertarian.

      Some wag commenting at Wonkette dubbed Santorum supporters Lubertarians.

      “Herb Does Provence” is some seriously classy hot gay porn.

      How about some hot Mormon gay porn about butt-banging missionaries? “Latter Day Taints” would be a funny title.

    344. steerpike said,

      February 11, 2012 at 4:12

      From Subby’s Jonah linkee:

      Now, the race is just a mess. I feel like the revolver in reality’s hand is full of blanks, and anyone who thinks they know what happens next is stabbing in the dark.

      Because the ship of the GOP is sinking in a forest fire of confusion, and they are stumbling in the darkness, wandering in the desert, searching for a sugar daddy to ride to the rescue on a white stallion.

    345. steerpike said,

      February 11, 2012 at 4:18

      Did the troll finally run away? Or is it just at Vespers?

    346. vacuumslayer said,

      February 11, 2012 at 4:22

      I think it may be at Vapahs.

    347. kg said,

      February 11, 2012 at 4:33

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aVhRIOVNaDw&feature=youtube_gdata_player

    348. vacuumslayer said,

      February 11, 2012 at 4:35

      Is erectile dysfunction a disease?

    349. Bitter Scribe said,

      February 11, 2012 at 4:36

      And we renew our call to the Catholic faithful, and to all our fellow Americans, to join together in this effort to protect religious liberty and freedom of conscience for all.

      Just like they’ve joined together in following your prohibition on birth control in the first place, right?

    350. vacuumslayer said,

      February 11, 2012 at 4:36

      What about depression? Disease?

    351. N__B said,

      February 11, 2012 at 4:38

      Fuck the bishops. They get the same right to influence policy as anyone else: one vote each. They think the federal government follows their teachings? They’re wrong…again.

    352. vacuumslayer said,

      February 11, 2012 at 4:39

      Your “religious liberty” ends where they infringe on my health needs, full stop.

    353. CRA said,

      February 11, 2012 at 4:42

      Digby had some relevant thoughts, prior to Obama’s compromise: I have nothing to add:

      “Among other things, I am morally opposed to money being spent on wars and capital punishment. And yet I am inexplicably forced to pay for these things through my taxes. And when I hire someone to work for me, I must pay a share of taxes for these things on their behalf as well. I demand that I be allowed a ‘conscience’ exemption.

      It truly does pain me to participate in these activities. I’m not kidding. But for some reason I’m forced to pay for many things the government does that appall me. But my conscience isn’t given any special dispensation. And the funny thing is that Catholics who believe as I do — and there are many — aren’t given any dispensation for those beliefs either. The only area where religion trumps citizenship is when it comes to private sexual behavior. Isn’t that odd?”

      http://digbysblog.blogspot.com/2012/02/icymi-bishops-move-goalposts.html

    354. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

      February 11, 2012 at 4:51

      The Bishops just called your bluff:

      This would be a perfect opportunity for the president to sign an executive order expanding Medicare coverage for all. Now, THAT would be a fantastic development, but I’m not holding my breath.

      Just like they’ve joined together in following your prohibition on birth control in the first place, right?

      As someone who was raised in the one, holy, catholic and apostolic Church, then transitioned to apatheism by way of Shane MacGowan Catholicism, I think that the bishops are going to run into some serious intransigence among the rank-and-file regarding the contraception issue. For a taste of what could happen, one need look no further than the Republic of Ireland.

    355. Snorghagen said,

      February 11, 2012 at 4:58

      That’s treating something that’s not functioning as it should.

      Like a brain afflicted with acute delusional christiano-wingnutitis.

    356. St. Trotsky, Pope-in-Avignon said,

      February 11, 2012 at 5:00

      All medicine is elective medicine. Better you should suffer and die and be with God.

      Incidentally, that’s a call for you to go first.

    357. CRA said,

      February 11, 2012 at 5:05

      The president has framed the issue as encompassed by preventive care, and therefore savings, in cases where women and their doctors agree on such a course of action.

      “We also accepted a recommendation from the experts at the Institute of Medicine that when it comes to women, preventive care should include coverage of contraceptive services such as birth control. In addition to family planning, doctors often prescribe contraception as a way to reduce the risks of ovarian and other cancers, and treat a variety of different ailments. And we know that the overall cost of health care is lower when women have access to contraceptive services.”

    358. Pupienus Maximus said,

      February 11, 2012 at 5:13

      Carbonnade à la Flamande, using beef short ribs. I was in a bit of a hurry while shopping and the Snafeway had no Belgican beers so I picked up a 22 oz. Bridgeport Raven Mad Imperial Porter. UIt’s 50% whiskey barrel aged porter and 50% unbarreled stout. I had a sip or twenty – it should do just fine!

    359. Fenwick said,

      February 11, 2012 at 5:14

      I love Shorters, Cerb! Thanks muchly!

      Even on the long, detailed take-downs, Shorters serve a useful purpose: The serve as a ‘second headline’ boiling down the essence of the wingnuttery article to serve as an introduction to draw the reader into the detailed critque.

      I rate for Shorters!

      Never gonna ketchup, I fear. Lordy, this thread is already 400+ comments; you peeples are like bunnies in heat.

    360. wiley witch said,

      February 11, 2012 at 5:21

      My lazy food porn is fish, chips, green beans, and salad for the y chromosome, and a grainy bagel with peanut butter for myself. Is lazy. I really like lazy sometimes.

      Have link to pictures of naked Hollywood ladies over at my place.

    361. CRA said,

      February 11, 2012 at 5:29

      Anonymous, would you seek a conscience clause for Catholics who want to follow the Vatican in not supporting capital punishment? I don’t want my taxes to pay for that, either, but I can’t claim a religious objection.

      I would gladly help pay for certain types of “elective” medicine, including cosmetic plastic surgery. People who are maimed or deformed can be afforded greater quality of life, employability, and so on. This is precisely the sort of thing good government could help people with. Frivolous nose jobs, of course not.

      And generally, if something’s plausibly “preventive” care, as contraception so clearly is in some cases, then it is “elective” in a decidedly less pejorative sense.

    362. CRA said,

      February 11, 2012 at 5:32

      “For goodness’ sake, equating prevention of cancer with prevention of pregnancy? Really?”

      Not equating them. Sheesh. The drugs have multiple effects.

    363. Snorghagen said,

      February 11, 2012 at 5:37

      The same creep that wrote this:
      For goodness’ sake, equating prevention of cancer with prevention of pregnancy? Really?

      also wrote this:
      Birth control is elective medecine. It’s as ridiculous as mandating coverage of elective plastic surgery.

      …equating the consequences of bearing an unwanted child with the consequences of not getting a boob job.

      Charming.

    364. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

      February 11, 2012 at 5:41

      Conservatives love nothing better than a face full of santorum.

    365. wiley witch said,

      February 11, 2012 at 5:45

      I think people who want to get paid to do a job should just do the fucking job. There is always a noble way out of what one considers to be a compromising situation, and it usually involves accepting the consequences of opting out— like losing the job or not getting it in the first place. It seems anyone who worships someone they believe to have been crucified for the sake of all, should have no problem with a wee little sacrifice like limiting one’s employment options or quitting a job.

      Anyone else tired of hearing this lazy troll whine about whatever it pulled out of it’s ass last?

    366. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      February 11, 2012 at 5:47

      Anonymous is Rick Santorum, btw.
      .

    367. Snorghagen said,

      February 11, 2012 at 5:51

      I’m equating demanding the “right” to sterile sex to wanting a facelift, yes.

      Sterile sex? Does that require the use of 10% bleach?

    368. Pryme said,

      February 11, 2012 at 5:51

      Anyone else tired of hearing this lazy troll whine about whatever it pulled out of it’s ass last?

      Ever since the whole “intelligence and religious beliefs are the exact same thing” mindset became obvious.

    369. St. Trotsky, Pope-in-Avignon said,

      February 11, 2012 at 5:57

      I’m tired of it being so lazy as to not even develop its own goddamn name. Also, tired of it breathing. Taking in oxygen is an elective bodily process, and it both picks my pocket and breaks my leg in demanding I allow it to inhale my oxygen and expel carbon dioxide, a poison.

    370. CRA said,

      February 11, 2012 at 5:59

      “However we are REQUIRED to pay taxes to the State, by teaching of the Church,”

      The church’s teaching fails to explain why you’re not cooperating materially with evil in such cases.

      The church is just being pragmatic by not aligning itself against the workings of modern nation-states. Under different circumstances you’d be instructed otherwise, just as under different circumstances all sorts of people might be excommunicated, ostensibly for violating church teachings.

      Sure, the plastic surgery we agree on is elective. You can elect to live with a cleft palate, or half your face burnt off, or you can elect to have surgery at someone’s expense.

      If you’re on a drug that causes horrific birth defects, you can elect to take a contraceptive, or you can use the rhythm method. You could also abstain, I suppose. But I think quality of life includes non-procreative sex.

    371. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      February 11, 2012 at 5:59

      I’m tired of it being so lazy as to not even develop its own goddamn name.

      Really, but it being RIck Santorum, he probably feels like it’d be a venial sin to not use his real name.
      .

    372. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

      February 11, 2012 at 6:01

      Wiley, there’s a killfile plugin if you want to abort all of the troll’s comments.

    373. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

      February 11, 2012 at 6:03

      Really, but it being RIck Santorum, he probably feels like it’d be a venial sin to not use his real name.

      Have you seen what his real name means? It’s probably a mortal sin to use it, because BUTTSEX!!!

    374. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      February 11, 2012 at 6:10

      I care what you have to say, and really, imma let you finish, but… naw, on second thought, enjoy the deep squats of badgers.
      .

    375. Pupienus Maximus said,

      February 11, 2012 at 6:13

      At last I see! Anonytwit is in the “no true Catholic” ward.

    376. John Revolta said,

      February 11, 2012 at 6:18

      Holy crap. I turn my back for 12 hours and there’s 400 comments? You bastids.

      Must be some serious trollin’ goin’ on. Well, here goes……………………..

    377. Christopher said,

      February 11, 2012 at 6:22

      Since there is absolutely nothing different about this election compared to previous years in terms of how insane the Republican candidates are, any failure of us to win is obviously due to election theft by the ghost of ACORN*.

      Okay, I didn’t see a single word in there about voter fraud or stolen elections.

      All I saw was a guy saying “I have compelling evidence that the American election system is an utter sham that completely fails to work as advertised. Now, what does this mean for our chances in November?”

      Honestly, his actual point was “The opposing party is going to try to increase their election chances by passing popular but ultimately bad legislation. We have to find a way to stick to our principles without alienating the voters” which seems less crazy and more, um, completely normal and reasonable.

      And, actually, I’m really not convinced the Republican Party HAS gotten any crazier. I guess the last batch of Presidential candidates knew how to hide their insanity a little bit better, but are they actually worse than the last batch?

    378. St. jim, Patron Saint Of Bitchslapping said,

      February 11, 2012 at 6:25

      Ah, so the dolt CAN speak after all. So easy to draw vermin out of the shadows when you prick their delicate egos.

      Big vocabulary, big pride, tiny anachronistic ideas.

      Not to mention plenty of non-answers & “NO U!” every time big bad reality comes a-calling.

      Yes, abortion jokes are proof of the unspeakable evil of the lefty crowd that believes women actually own their own bodies. Also, to judge by “His representative on Earth,” Jesus was a Hitlerjugend fanboy & enjoys protecting serial child rapists in his spare time (at least, until they finally get caught & called out on it – then it’s time to BLAME TEH HIPPIES & THEIR UNCHRISTIAN FREE LOVE MADNESS!)… oh, & one teeny-tiny amendment needs to be inserted: fewer priests HAVE BEEN CAUGHT diddling teh kiddies than in the general male population (I’m sure his both knowing all your dirtiest secrets & literally having the power to damn you to an eternity in hellfire couldn’t possibly influence your decision to tell the cops what he really is, right?).

      So yeah, yet more fail – which is a shocker coming from the simpering gobshite with the gall to cite Mother Church’s vigorous support for science through the long ugly centuries of the Dark Ages that they kept alive & well long after real progress should’ve begun by jailing, censoring or simply barbecuing anyone who got out of line – an awful lot of folks like Giordano Bruno found out the hard way just what awesome science lovers the Vatican Mafia were. Just imagine where we’d all be today if the Renaissance of the Ninth Century had been encouraged to flourish instead of being strangled in its cradle … so to speak.

      Oh, & please kindly ignore the Final Solution to the pagan problem that was enacted with such joy by the Lambs O’ God for centuries on end: hey, if those silly girls didn’t want to be burned alive by the hundreds of thousands, they should’ve just joined the same insane cult that thought burning people alive was jolly good fun – too bad they were terminally infected with basic human decency & thus beyond the reach of God’s Sweet Love™.

      Ditto the pointless marathon psychosis of human misery & death that was the Crusades.

      Ditto the Reichskonkordat (note that Goebbels was excommunicated not for aiding & abetting genocide or aggression, nor for being an apologist for torture, but for the vile crime of marrying a Protestant). Pay no attention to the guy solemnly sprinkling holy water on Stuka dive-bombers behind the curtain, sheeple!

      Ditto the decades-long roar of silence while staunchly Roman Catholic death-squads were happily ripping fetuses out of the wombs of peasant women in Central & South America, or throwing their babies in the air & catching them on their bayonets, as part of their personal exercise in ethnic cleansing. Boys will be boys, amirite?

      CHOOSE LIFE … & if those nasty whores die from complications that the doctors saw coming a mile away, well heck, it’s Magog’s Will, so STFU about us restricting access to your icky elective surgery, sinner! That stupid bitch who dies in horrific agony from her ectopic pregnancy just needs to understand that PREGNANCY IS NOT A DISEASE.

      Fact: the best way to lower abortion rates is via contraception.
      Fact: most Catholics who oppose abortion also oppose contraception.

      “Credibility? We don’ need no steenking credibility!”

    379. Snorghagen said,

      February 11, 2012 at 6:38

      And, actually, I’m really not convinced the Republican Party HAS gotten any crazier.

      Perhaps you’ve been in a coma since 2008.

    380. Nym said,

      February 11, 2012 at 6:40

      The usual suspects will commence either ROFLing or BAAAAWING respectively the songs of their venerable & much-beloved “Obama caved in AGAIN, SHEEPLE!”

      [forced to create a nickname because of the shitty Anon]

      I notice ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© hasn’t posted. I suspect he’s just priapic.

    381. Major Kong said,

      February 11, 2012 at 6:53

      Jeez! I fly all the way from Edmonton to Memphis and he’s still trolling?

    382. Substance McGravitas said,

      February 11, 2012 at 6:56

      Jeez! I fly all the way from Edmonton to Memphis and he’s still trolling?

      Who cares? You have FOOD again.

    383. jim said,

      February 11, 2012 at 7:05

      I think ittdgy(superscript orgy) sometimes goes overboard with the “Bush 2.0″ business, but he also makes some damn good points – & anyway, saying Barack Obama is the greatest POTUS of the 21st Century is pretty much damning with faint praise, given the competition.

    384. N__B said,

      February 11, 2012 at 7:06

      I fly all the way from Edmonton to Memphis and he’s still trolling?

      The RCC hasn’t given him permission to stop. Or, for that matter, to wipe his ass.

    385. Spengler Dampniche said,

      February 11, 2012 at 7:07

      Helmut Monotreme said

      Those blowhards want a military coup so bad they can taste it.

      This.

    386. Snorghagen said,

      February 11, 2012 at 7:14

      The RCC hasn’t given him permission to stop. Or, for that matter, to wipe his ass.

      Ass-wiping is a purely elective process.

    387. N__B said,

      February 11, 2012 at 7:16

      Ass-wiping is a purely elective process.

      Always with the santorum.

    388. Whale Chowder said,

      February 11, 2012 at 8:57

      Always with the santorum.

      As an elective procedure it’s not covered by your insurance.

    389. Nym said,

      February 11, 2012 at 10:26

      jim: Oh, I find President Obama very frustrating– and sadly, he may be one of the better presidents in my lifetime to date.

    390. Fenwick said,

      February 11, 2012 at 10:55

      From Sub’s Jonah link….

      Romney often sounds like HAL refusing to open the bomb-bay doors

      Epic fail.

      My nomination for the most ironically-named bloodsoaked megalomanic in all of recorded history is Pope Innocent the Third. (But it’s all okay, y’unnerstand, because he was Bishop of Rome, God’s Vicar on Earth.)

      Troll has major problems with logical consistency. Also with facts. Also with gaping holes in his arguments, so big that people could drive Mack trucks through. Lotta Mack trucks in this strand! (Special props to Chris.)

      I feel humble to be considered as a possible fake Anonymous. I’ve not yet tried my hand at extended Fake Trolling. Mainly because I’m not fast enough to dodge the Mack Trucks. I doubt I could sustain Fake Trolling as long as Real Troll has done: Now there is one evasive (and oblivious) d00d!

      Speaking of faux trolling, total props to Not Gary! TWO deftly concealed jokes. Much laughter in Baltimore.

      This is yet another Fun Thread to read. You are on a roll, peeples!

    391. g said,

      February 11, 2012 at 11:13

      Back here after an evening grooving to Hugh Masekela performing.

      Is the fucking troll still here?

    392. Anonymous also said,

      February 11, 2012 at 12:02

      MY POOPIES STICK TO THE WALL!!!

    393. Hogeye Grex said,

      February 11, 2012 at 12:04

      Say has anyone seen the Cathars lately? I can’t seem to find them anywhere.

      I think God is still sorting them out.

    394. Hogeye Grex said,

      February 11, 2012 at 12:11

      God didn’t “write” the Bible.

      And yet somehow it has the magical ability to be the only possible source of objective morality? Even though it is only the work of man?

      Riiiiiiiight.

      Which is it?

    395. Cerberus said,

      February 11, 2012 at 13:18

      Drive by cleanup one. I’m sure, he’ll have some more filth to smear on the walls by morning.

    396. Suezboo said,

      February 11, 2012 at 13:41

      Hugh Masekela = SAfrican icon.Therefore, obligatory Oh Wow! to you, sir.

    397. Smut Clyde said,

      February 11, 2012 at 14:17

      From Sub’s Jonah link….
      Romney often sounds like HAL refusing to open the bomb-bay doors

      Oh dear. Freudian slip? Or is it just that Mr Popular-Culture-references knows little even of popular culture, except through summaries and Cliff Notes?

    398. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      February 11, 2012 at 14:57

      Cheese, glorious cheese!
      .

    399. actor212 said,

      February 11, 2012 at 15:16

      Wow! You kids…clean up this mess!

    400. CRA said,

      February 11, 2012 at 16:46

      “Back here after an evening grooving to Hugh Masekela performing.”

      Did he play “Grazing in the Grass”? He wouldna hafta, but I for one would appreciate it.

      The Friends of Distinction version is better than most of their tracks:
      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wxVLHaHUI4E

      The F.o.D. interests me because they’re so obviously an attempt to replicate the Fifth Dimension. They can’t hold a candle to ‘em tho. The F.o.D. cover of “Light my Fire” is unlistenable. The Fifth Dimension could’ve slam-dunked it. With the help of a good arranger, of course.

    401. Matt said,

      February 11, 2012 at 18:45

      Given that the modern GOP standard for “election fraud” is “brown and/or poor and/or female people voting”, I’d say they’ll be “victims” of tons of it…

    402. g said,

      February 11, 2012 at 20:15

      Did he play “Grazing in the Grass”? He wouldna hafta, but I for one would appreciate it.

      Encore. Coal Train was awesome.

    403. sparks said,

      February 12, 2012 at 4:33

      Roger “Abortion” Miller

      Forceps may cause a rent
      Plan B will cost you 50 cents
      Go hock your jewels and furs
      I never use no coathangers

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