The Solanum tuberosum commonly has its largest growth underneath itself.
Adam Hasner, American Reverse Spew:
Conservatism Set Me on the Pro-Life Path
If there is one word to describe this nascent year in conservatism, it’d be batshit. If two, it’d be fucking batshit, but before this turns into a Monty Python skit, let’s skip straight ahead and note that beyond the usual doubling down of crazy, the season has been dominated by an incredible amount of dishonesty.
Now, dishonesty and wingnuts go together like Republicans and double wetsuit dildos, but even for our annually fact-challenged, there has been a noticeable increase in the usual areas. Projection has skyrocketed to accommodate their candidates realizing that the 27% are pretty much the only Republican primary voters left. And Republican candidates realizing that they no longer need to pretend to value truth to our bought-and-sold media have begun openly spinning their preferred model of reality as if the internet didn’t make it embarrassingly easy to disprove their fantasies.
Hell, one can say that we’ve gotten so used to conservatives defaulting to dishonesty as a first recourse, that it is rather shocking when they deliver some long lost honesty, much like a sickening flower blooming once every thousand years.
So it is, with this quaint post by Republican Senatorial candidate and professional tater lookalike, Adam Hasner.
I thought the interview with Anne Conlon was both impressive and instructive, and it stirred in me some thoughts about abortion in America, on this, the day of the annual March for Life in Washington.
Ah, right, the 39th anniversary of Roe v Wade has many conservatives reflective on how they always seem to be decades behind an issue they already decisively lost, but are still fighting anyways.
As a Jew, I can appreciate the evolution of Conlon’s — and others’ — thought process on the issue of abortion. And I know first hand what it’s like to disagree with family and friends on this fundamental issue.
I attended public schools growing up, and while the Jewish faith is theologically and historically a pro-life faith, the strong strain of secularism within Judaism has taken many in the religion away from its pro-life roots.
Well, he’s a conservative. He couldn’t have a post that was entirely honesty, so he sells a quick lie to keep his hand in and signal the mouth-breathers that he isn’t some traitor who acknowledges the sky is blue.
As the son of liberal Democrats, I didn’t inherit my pro-life views or have them engrained in me by schooling or my institutions of faith.
I have listened to the stories of people explaining how viewing an ultrasound for the first time or the experience of becoming a father or a mother can solidify a belief in the sanctity of life. I have not experienced this either.
And yet I still arrived at the conclusion that every life is sacred from conception until natural death. That is because we cherish life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness in this country, and those rights should extend to every life, born and unborn.
Except women, of course.
But I have to hand it to him, a conservative not pretending that his “deeply held beliefs” has any connection to some sort of “profound event” often with a wink and a nod suggesting that evil liberal abortionists have never done something as profound as “seen an ultrasound”?
So Mr. Hasner, if not those things, what was it that made you such a staunch forced-birther? Will you spin some story about Planned Parenthood and Hitler? Seeing an aborted fetus reanimate itself and beg for the rescinding of established medical ethics and law? The gun currently being held against your head by a fanatical “pro-life” terrorist?
I arrived at these conclusions because, before I ever really thought of the abortion issue, I was a conservative.
Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you that rare and delicate thing.
Naked honesty from a conservative.
Appreciate this gem, for we will not see its like for many a day hence.
I came of age during the Reagan Revolution, steeped myself in conservatism, and registered as a Republican at age 18. Being pro-life isn’t just a moral issue for me; it’s a historical and constitutional one. Understanding the creation of Planned Parenthood and the pro-abortion movement helped shape my view. But I’m pro-life because I was conservative first. I wonder how many other people out there can say the same.
I have a much deeper faith today, and I find pride and comfort in Judaism’s historical defense of life. But I know that conservatism helped set me on the path.
He’s anti-choice because he was a conservative and being a conservative means you buy whatever half-formed insane nonsense is presented to you as the price of the tribe. And those beliefs are now dear to him, because being fanatically anti-woman is how you show membership to the tribe, to question it is to question the tribe.
If this seems suspiciously like a cult, then you should be ashamed of yourself!
Cults get better hats.
That’s why I recoil whenever I hear people — even those within my own party — say we need to get away from social issues.
Yeah! How dare we get away from social issues I only care about because I was told being conservative meant I had to care about those issues and conservatives are nothing if not firm believers in the practice of sunk costs?
Not changing even when reality and the will of the people say otherwise is the hallmark of a great man…or someone incapable of handling the task of dressing and feeding themselves daily. One or the other.
Or that we’re “on the losing side” of the marriage debate, or the sanctity of life argument. The defense of life just doesn’t “move voters,” I’ve heard more than one consultant say.
I hope that never becomes the majority view in our movement. If it does, we will never earn the right to be the governing majority in America, nor will we deserve to. I will continue to speak clearly and consistently on the connection between our moral values and economic prosperity.
Yeah, how would we ever manage to hold the governing majority in America if we cater to petty things like “the will of the people”? Or acknowledge that spewing archaic shit people thought settled decades ago just makes people less keen on electing us to positions of power?
The real path to power is to espouse reviled and bigoted beliefs long past their for-sale date. For instance, have you ever considered that the real path to power lies in ranting about the perfidy of the Irishman?
The anniversary of Roe v. Wade is a grim observance. It marks an uncorrected mistake in American history. If the conservative movement ever stops being the home of the pro-life movement, this grim observance — and its consequences — will mark many more anniversaries.
I’m not sure that sentence manages to actually successfully say anything.
But I guess you needed to demonstrate your fealty to the crazy train after basically spending a post noting that the only reason you are a “firm believer in this moral cause” is because you fear getting off this train is the fastest route to ending up on those lists “perfectly legal and not at all connected to the lone-wolf terrorist” “pro-life” organizations like to circulate with the home addresses and daily schedules of “enemies”.
It’s okay, just wink once for “he’s got a gun against my head” and I’ll totally come help you, once I’m done making a sandwich.
Now, what mustard goes best with rye?