So I have this new theory about Gary Ruppert, the conservative troll who tirelessly cuts’n'pastes GOP blast faxes into our comments section every day.
I believe that “Gary” is actually a 10-year-old Mexican boy named Guillermo Ruperto whose family got caught sneaking across the US-Mexico border, and who now must work as GOP political operatives to earn their citizenship in a trial run of Bush’s Guest Worker Program.
Above: The real Gary Ruppert sez, “El hecho
es que Presidente Bush es un gran jefe.”
You can just imagine the wacky exchanges that occur on a daily basis, can’t you?
KARL ROVE: Young Gary, have you posted my faxes onto those lefty blogs yet?
GARY: Sí, Señor Rove. But I aym so confused. How cayn I raynt about how bad Hollywood elites are een one sayntaynce, and thayn support geeving thaym a tax cut een the nayxt? Eet makes no saynse!
KARL ROVE: It doesn’t have to “make saynse,” you little bastard! Have you seen the people we’re trying to appeal to here? They have a total of three brain cells and two teeth!
GARY: Yays, Meester Rove. *sigh* “The fact is that the Democrats are the party of defeat who hate the troops…”